November 8, 2025 • 52 mins
Episode: 2025.11.08
The Living Full Out show with Nancy Solari encourages you to exceed expectations. Life often challenges us to go further than we ever thought possible — to rise above self-doubt or uncertainty and discover new strength within ourselves. Join Nancy as she explores how pushing past your limits can help you break through barriers and live full out with courage and confidence.
Our first caller, Megan recently accepted a new nursing position and is preparing to move to a new state. She asked Nancy for advice on how to make a new city feel like home without an established social network. Nancy encouraged Megan to take small, bold steps — to join local hobby groups through sites like Meetup.com, be approachable in public spaces, and build connections at work by inviting coworkers to explore new places together. She reminded Megan that openness and initiative are key to forming meaningful relationships and turning a new environment into a supportive community. Tune in to hear Nancy’s heartfelt advice for anyone starting over in a new place and looking to build a sense of belonging.
Our inspirational guest, Derek Stefureac, shares his journey of resilience and renewal after being diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. Once a stand-up comedian and performer, Derek began experiencing unexpected health issues that eventually led to his MS diagnosis. Facing mobility challenges and uncertainty about his future, he chose to approach life with courage and optimism. Despite the setbacks, Derek found purpose in helping others and proving that determination can outshine any diagnosis. Tune in to hear how Derek continues to live boldly and inspire hope through every challenge.
Perhaps you’re facing your own moment of uncertainty or feel limited by your circumstances. Remember that exceeding expectations begins with believing you can. By challenging yourself to go further and refusing to settle, you too can break through your own barriers and live full out.
#LivingFullOut #NancySolari #DerekStefureac #ExceedingExpectations #Resilience #Inspiration #Motivation #LifeCoach #PersonalGrowth #OvercomingChallenges #Mindset #SelfDiscovery #InnerStrength #Determination #Courage #LiveFullOut #PositiveChange #Purpose
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/living-full-out-show--1474350/support.
The Living Full Out show with Nancy Solari encourages you to exceed expectations. Life often challenges us to go further than we ever thought possible — to rise above self-doubt or uncertainty and discover new strength within ourselves. Join Nancy as she explores how pushing past your limits can help you break through barriers and live full out with courage and confidence.
Our first caller, Megan recently accepted a new nursing position and is preparing to move to a new state. She asked Nancy for advice on how to make a new city feel like home without an established social network. Nancy encouraged Megan to take small, bold steps — to join local hobby groups through sites like Meetup.com, be approachable in public spaces, and build connections at work by inviting coworkers to explore new places together. She reminded Megan that openness and initiative are key to forming meaningful relationships and turning a new environment into a supportive community. Tune in to hear Nancy’s heartfelt advice for anyone starting over in a new place and looking to build a sense of belonging.
Our inspirational guest, Derek Stefureac, shares his journey of resilience and renewal after being diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. Once a stand-up comedian and performer, Derek began experiencing unexpected health issues that eventually led to his MS diagnosis. Facing mobility challenges and uncertainty about his future, he chose to approach life with courage and optimism. Despite the setbacks, Derek found purpose in helping others and proving that determination can outshine any diagnosis. Tune in to hear how Derek continues to live boldly and inspire hope through every challenge.
Perhaps you’re facing your own moment of uncertainty or feel limited by your circumstances. Remember that exceeding expectations begins with believing you can. By challenging yourself to go further and refusing to settle, you too can break through your own barriers and live full out.
#LivingFullOut #NancySolari #DerekStefureac #ExceedingExpectations #Resilience #Inspiration #Motivation #LifeCoach #PersonalGrowth #OvercomingChallenges #Mindset #SelfDiscovery #InnerStrength #Determination #Courage #LiveFullOut #PositiveChange #Purpose
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/living-full-out-show--1474350/support.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
You're listening the Living Full Out with Nancy Solari. As
a professional motivational speaker, Nancy can assist you to blow
through your setbacks and start living full out. If you
have an inspirational story you want to share, email us
at connect at livingfollout dot com. Once again, here's Nancy.
Speaker 2 (00:19):
Welcome to the Living Full Out Show. My name is
Nancy Solari, and today we'll be talking about exceeding expectations. Now,
sometimes those are what others want us to do or
be or become right. But other times we put these
little weights of the world on our own shoulders. We
have large aspirations and I think the winning moments are
(00:41):
what we learn along the way. Even the times we
fail are times that we can rebound and climb back
to the top of that mountain and say we did it,
we conquered it.
Speaker 3 (00:51):
But today we are going to be.
Speaker 2 (00:53):
Talking about expectations and how to make sure that they're
serving us, not pulling us backwards, but leaving us into
an inspirational place. Now, our inspirational guests coming up, though,
Derek Steffree act he is amazing, okay to have multiple
sclerosis but yet be a runner that is not common
(01:14):
and his journey is one where running was not always
his thing, but he found that it gave him clarity,
It helped him to get to know his body better.
And I think as we all go through this journey
of life, we want to be more centered, we want
to kind of feel comfortable in our skin, and he
is a great example of that. So you're really gonna
(01:34):
love his interview. I want to make sure though, that
beyond today's show, that you know that you can go
to the app store and get the Living Full Out
Show app. It's free and listen to us anytime you want.
Will be right there beside you every step of the
way in your motivational journey. And also if you want,
go to our website, Livingfullout dot com. We've got the
(01:54):
twenty four hour station and you can listen to shows
over and over again.
Speaker 3 (01:58):
If you're just.
Speaker 2 (01:59):
Doing some domestic duties around the house, will be there
to keep you inspired. Now, our producer is reaching out
to me. Here, we have a caller in the line.
Let's go check in with them. Hello, welcome to the
Living Full Out Show.
Speaker 4 (02:11):
Hi Nancy, I'm Megan. I had a question. I recently
got a new job and so I'm moving, So I
was wondering what advice do you have for making a
new place or a new city or town feel more
like home and more comfortable, especially when you don't start
with like a big social networker knowing a lot of people.
Speaker 2 (02:35):
Well, first of all, congratulations on the new job. That
is so exciting. What are you going to be doing.
Speaker 4 (02:43):
I'm a nurse, So I got a new job on
a surgical oncology for Okay.
Speaker 2 (02:49):
Well, if I need a nurse, I know where to
find one, right, thank you for a Megan. Yeah, okay, Well,
so here's the thing. I actually am quite a bit
of an expert at this moving thing because I've done
that a lot myself. And you know, there's many different
ways that you can meet people. Of course, if you
go to a church, or you go to a community center,
(03:10):
or if you you know, want to join the clubs
of some kind. There's a site that I've used quite
a bit called meetup dot com. Have you heard about that? Yeah, okay,
so meetup dot com and there's other ones like it
that's just been around a long long time, and you
can go on there and you can find groups of
(03:30):
different hobbies that you have, like I'm a karaoke nut,
and so there was a time a couple of years
back where I was just kind of looking to open
up my friendship base, kind of like you are, and
I went and found some karaoke groups and now they
are some of my best friends.
Speaker 3 (03:46):
And you can do.
Speaker 2 (03:47):
Cooking groups and volleyball whatever it is that you want
to do. And the other thing too is being open
to people talking to you. And what I mean by
that is you're not going to know anyone. And I know,
when you go to eat, it might be tempting to
talk on the phone to you know, a friend that
you've had talked to in a while from your old
you know, your old hometown. But if you go eat
(04:10):
and you're on the phone, you're less approachable. And so
I find that when I've gone to New towns, it
really helps to just kind of not be on the phone,
maybe read a looking at a book, or you know,
allow yourself to have somebody to come up to you
and say hi, you know, welcome. You know is that
you know is this seat taken right? Who knows? You
(04:32):
might get a friend and a significant other all in one,
you know what I mean. The other thing too is
be bold to make friends at work. You know, it
wasn't too long ago in my neighborhood that I was
and this is I've lived here for a while. But
there was a gal and I was trying to do
something and she helped me get this really large box
(04:55):
into a trash can and I could have gone easily
on my way. I found out in doing that that
she had just moved there, and I was like, hey, would.
Speaker 3 (05:04):
You like to exchange numbers?
Speaker 2 (05:06):
You want to go to lunch now that I lived here,
But I was gifting kind of that alive branch that
you know, I'm happy to be your friend. And it
can be on the reverse. You can go to work
and you can meet people, but if you don't put
yourself out there, they're not going to know. So you
could say to somebody, hey, I'm trying to get to
know some new places here. You know, anybody available on
(05:29):
the weekend, I'd love to go on a hike. I'd
love to check out a new restaurant. And you know,
sure enough, someone is going to say, yeah, I'd love
to do that. But you just kind of kind of
put yourself out there. What is it about going to
this new town that intimidates you the most.
Speaker 4 (05:47):
I don't know. I think I am more kind of
a person who likes to remain to themselves a little bit,
and so I've kind of worked a little bit last
few years to branch out and open up to more
people and stuff. But I think it's also just going
to a different state and kind of a different region
in the country that I'm maybe not used to and
(06:09):
not used to kind of I guess the vibe.
Speaker 2 (06:13):
Well, and do you have any hobbies that you enjoy?
Speaker 4 (06:17):
Yeah, I like to read, and I like running and
stuff like that.
Speaker 2 (06:21):
So so it's possible that there's running groups, yeah, right,
group book clubs.
Speaker 3 (06:28):
Right.
Speaker 2 (06:29):
And the thing is, sometimes when you go to a
new city, you don't want to have to be on
right that on moment. Right, It's okay to let yourself
kind of wander around, you know, kind of soak up
the new vibe, right, the culture of the area, and
(06:50):
don't put so much pressure on yourself that you have
to acclimate so quickly and personally. I mean, this could
be your forever location. You might move again, right, you
might find yourself even moving home. So I would just
try to look at this less intimidating less scary and
(07:12):
more as an adventure, and you know, keep your eye
on the ball of why you're there in the first place.
You're there because of nursing, and why did you go
into nursing.
Speaker 4 (07:28):
I like helping people, and I enjoy the person aspect
of nursing, but along with that, I like the like healthcare,
sciencey side of it. So it was kind of a
best of both worlds of a lot of people interaction
and helping people feel better while also learn a lot
about medicine.
Speaker 3 (07:48):
And you know, it's interesting.
Speaker 2 (07:51):
We've interviewed a lot of guests over the years, and
so many of our guests who have been in hospital
and rehabilitation centers, the nurses, the doctors, but mainly the
nurses oftentimes have become like very good friends of theirs.
And I actually think given the industry, given the lane
(08:15):
that you're in, and how when somebody's at their most vulnerable,
you know you're there for them, you're their their line
of support. I actually think you're going to learn a
lot about your new town. I think you know, as
you move along, you're going to find that you know,
some of these patients that you work on may even
(08:36):
be your friends.
Speaker 3 (08:38):
But just keep your.
Speaker 2 (08:38):
Mind open, keep your heart open, keep that sense of adventure.
Even if you're not the loudest person in the room,
you know, just kind of absorb this time. Time goes
so fast and something is leading you there. It may
be the purpose of being a nurse and the impact
(08:59):
that you're going to make all the patients that you serve.
It may be that your best friend of all the times,
of all the friends you've ever known, your best friend
is there. You just haven't met that person yet yet.
It might mean that there's love waiting for you there,
you just don't know it yet. So sometimes when we
move to a new town, it's kind of this, I
(09:21):
wonder what's going to happen. I'm so excited to see
what's going to happen, right, So go into it with
that excitement, and I think kind of the nerves and
the loneliness will will dissipate over time. But let that excitement,
that zest for life and adventure be er your go to. Okay, hell,
(09:43):
thank you so much for calling in and again check
out that meetup dot com.
Speaker 3 (09:47):
I think you'll really enjoy it.
Speaker 4 (09:48):
Okay, well, do thank you so much.
Speaker 3 (09:50):
You got it.
Speaker 2 (09:51):
I actually really appreciate that she asked that question, because
the thing is, it can be intimidating when we have
change happening in our life, when we feel like, okay,
everything is like stable and good in my life, and
then all of a sudden switch, something new happens and
we have to, you know, kind of pivot. But I
(10:12):
also look at those as opportunities for how inspiration can
come into your life in the most unexpected ways. So
when we talk today about exceeding our expectations, part of
that is getting out of our shells, out of our boxes,
coloring outside the lines from time to time, because you
want to make sure that life is playful, that it's fun,
(10:35):
that you always keep in your heart, that inquisitive side,
that laughter, that desire to want to go out there
and just live up life to all it can be.
So we'll be coming right back with Derek Stefuriac again,
a story you don't want to miss.
Speaker 3 (10:52):
Stay tuned.
Speaker 5 (11:01):
Life looks a little different during these times. We're doing
our best to keep our minds and bodies strong, and
getting a flu shot helps us stay healthy so we
don't miss out on what matters, like having game night
at home. Yeah, can't do that, we'll sick with the flu.
(11:24):
Now imagine family movie night that your daughter can't live without. Well,
that's ruined. And don't forget your uncle's socially distanced cookouts.
See that's why it's important to be at our strongest.
(11:45):
Every year, millions of people in the US get the flu,
especially now. No one has time to miss out on
moments that matter. So get your flu shot. Find out
more and get my flu shot dot org. Brought to
you by the AMA CDC and the AD Council.
Speaker 6 (12:00):
Don't you wish your life came with a warning app?
Speaker 7 (12:03):
Stop that dog does not want to be pettitive.
Speaker 6 (12:07):
Just a little heads up before something bad happens.
Speaker 7 (12:10):
Move your coffee cup away from your computer.
Speaker 2 (12:13):
Oh no, no, no.
Speaker 6 (12:14):
No, so you can have more control.
Speaker 7 (12:16):
Stop you're texting your boss by mistakes.
Speaker 8 (12:21):
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a few healthy changes like managing your weight, getting active,
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Speaker 6 (12:37):
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Speaker 8 (12:39):
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Speaker 7 (12:44):
Is loose on that cat. Young.
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Speaker 8 (12:48):
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prediabetes dot org? Brought to you by the AD Council
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Speaker 5 (13:00):
Hehu oh brah, that's buzzed. Oh yeah, yeah, he's starting
with the woots.
Speaker 9 (13:05):
And now a speech.
Speaker 10 (13:07):
I just want to say that friendship is about heart,
heart and brain.
Speaker 11 (13:12):
Who's with me?
Speaker 2 (13:13):
Good thing is he knows when he's buzzed, and my
brain is saying when it's time to go home, Somebody
call me a ride. Love that guy, me too.
Speaker 8 (13:21):
Know your buzzed warning signs, call for a ride when
it's time to go home.
Speaker 6 (13:25):
Buzz Driving is drunk driving. A message for NITZA and
the AD Council. True what you're out?
Speaker 7 (13:34):
You got me?
Speaker 12 (13:35):
Galaxy safe once again.
Speaker 13 (13:38):
In the pretend universe, kids play with pretend guns. In
the real world, it's up to us to make sure
they don't get their hands on a real gun. If
you have a gun in the house, keep it locked, unloaded,
and storage separately from ammunition. Safegun storage saves lives. Learn
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That's Nfamilyfire dot Org. Brought to you by N Familyfire,
Brady and the AD Council.
Speaker 14 (13:59):
Adopt Us Kids presents what to expect when you're expecting
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Speaker 10 (14:05):
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(14:27):
to the mall with Becca. Another word you might hear
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Speaker 14 (14:39):
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Thousands of teens in foster care will think you're rad
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the US Department of Health and Human Services, adopt Us Kids,
and the AD Council.
Speaker 1 (15:00):
You're listening to living full out with Nancy Soilary. As
a life coach, Nancy can teach you how to stay
strong under pressure and work through challenges you face. Being
legally blind, Nancy inspires others to be resilient and overcoming
obstacles and live full out. You could ask Nancy for
advice in your life on relationships, finance, business, health, and more.
(15:22):
Just call in at eight hundred three three three zero
zero zero one. Once again, that's eight hundred three three
three zero zero zero one. Now here's Nancy.
Speaker 2 (15:33):
Welcome back. I'm Nancy Silary and this is the Living
Full Out Show, and today we're talking about exceeding expectations.
And as promised, I brought your inspirational guest today, Derek Stifuriac.
And I don't want to give his whole journey away,
but I'll let you know it's relatable and in some
cases maybe not. You'll know what I mean. Welcome Derek
to the show.
Speaker 3 (15:54):
Thank you, so happy to have you.
Speaker 7 (15:57):
Now.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
I would have loved to have been friends with you know,
growing up. But most of all I think of that
sixth grade you you know what I'm talking about, championship
in baseball, The moment, oh, the big moment.
Speaker 3 (16:12):
Yes, and you stuck out, not.
Speaker 15 (16:14):
Only struck out, took a called third strike. I didn't
even swing.
Speaker 2 (16:19):
Ugh, And okay, I'm not bringing this to you on
the interview to make you feel bad years later. But
the truth is moments like that, isn't it interesting how
they just stay with us, Like why can't we let
them go? Why can't we just let that little boy
(16:40):
run and have a good time? But the truth is
you you, even at that age, wanted to taste success.
You wanted to taste winning. And I know that as
you went along in your life as many do you know,
fourteen on where you started drinking, you start smoking. Yeah,
(17:02):
had a bit of a rough patch with driving under
the influence. How many of those did you get in college?
Speaker 15 (17:10):
Three if you can believe it, three times? Yeah, wow, Yeah,
at age eighteen, at age nineteen, and at age twenty
twenty one. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (17:22):
So when you were kind of in that moment, I'm
sure your parents were not super proud at that moment.
And here you are, here, you are, you know, just
trying to figure out like what am I meant to do?
What am I meant to be? What I think is
interesting is comedy was always you know, you were kind
of the jokester and a little little kiddo, right joking
(17:42):
throughout your life. And you decided although your parents wanted
you to get a degree, and you got a degree,
finally you stopped drinking.
Speaker 3 (17:50):
You got a degree in engineering, but.
Speaker 2 (17:53):
You decided, I want to bite that apple, I want
to taste my dream. What made you finally switch from
engineering to comedy.
Speaker 15 (18:02):
It'd been in my head since as far back as
I can remember that all I loved doing was making
people laugh, and that I just wanted to be a comedian.
I wanted to be like David Letterman, like hosts that
Late Night with Derek Spiiak and all that. But I
went through college and did all that, and my parents
(18:22):
told me I could always fall back on it. And
when I was twenty six, there was a stand up
comedy club that offered a stand up comedy class and
at the end of the class you would do your
five minute bit. And I did that, and man, it
totally opened my It was so exhilarating and so like
I felt like this is what I was meant to do.
(18:42):
That I started working more on comedy, and eventually a
year later, I got to quit my job to do
this college game show, tour around to different universities and
do a little kind of a game show for kids
in the dorms. But it was performing in that And
(19:03):
after that I met up with a guy who had
an act and we ended up traveling all over the
world and it ended up landed me in Las Vegas,
a two person comedy act. It was more variety comedy
where we dressed up like in little costumes and danced around.
Speaker 2 (19:18):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (19:19):
What was the act called.
Speaker 15 (19:21):
It's called the Quiddler's qu idb l e r S.
But yeah, wow, that is today there's like a kind
of a comedy troupe that's been around for about thirty
years now.
Speaker 2 (19:32):
Wow, and you even got another gig where you're doing
the same comedy act but around burlesque dancers. I mean
that must have been kind of exotic and fun at
the same time.
Speaker 15 (19:44):
And not a bad gig for a twenty eight year
old single guy to be the comic relief in a
show with you know, a dozen French burlesque dancers.
Speaker 6 (19:52):
Yeah, could be.
Speaker 2 (19:53):
Could be harder days really, And in fact, love found
you around that time. Although you weren't boast a data dancer,
you did, but ended up.
Speaker 3 (20:03):
Having your daughter.
Speaker 2 (20:05):
And yeah, was being a father something that you thought
would be in your cards in your life.
Speaker 15 (20:12):
I yes, always in the back of my mind, but
not in the front of my mind and not when
it happened, and that kind of thing. I didn't feel
prepared and.
Speaker 2 (20:22):
That.
Speaker 15 (20:23):
But the relationship with her mother and I didn't work out.
And in the beginning there those feelings of fatherhood and
all of that stuff and taking care of my daughter
really grew like stronger than I thought. I mean I
thought real hard for custody and that kind of stuff,
and yeah, it changes you. I held my daughter right
(20:46):
when she was born and like two minutes old in
my hands and her little body there, and it really
it's powerful.
Speaker 3 (20:54):
You know, that's amazing.
Speaker 2 (20:55):
Now, you weren't in a costume in that moment, right
you were?
Speaker 13 (20:57):
You were you?
Speaker 3 (20:58):
Okay?
Speaker 2 (20:59):
No, I mean it'd be a little weird if Elvis
was holding your daughter, you mean Elis.
Speaker 15 (21:06):
But the local newspaper though.
Speaker 2 (21:09):
That part is true, always thinking, Derek, always thinking. I
admire that well. I mean, even as of today, you know,
you and I doing this interview here, you are traveling
and doing your thing, and you know, one of the
things that is so impressive about your story is just
that you are willing to try. You're willing to put
(21:30):
yourself out there. And we're talking today about exceeding expectations.
And you were always looking to be, you know, the
best father you could be, even though you it wasn't
It was unplanned, and you didn't know what it was
all going to look like and be like. And you're
saying with you know, going after comedy, you know, you
didn't know if you would be the starving comic or
(21:51):
if it would work out. And you know, if you're
having to hear a couple I told you so is
from your parents, right. But ultimately the day came when
the left side of your body went numb.
Speaker 3 (22:03):
What was that?
Speaker 15 (22:06):
Yeah? By at this time, I had gone back. I
fell back at my engineering career after my daughter was
born and I was raising her. That the nine to
five engineering job worked out a lot better for raising
a kid. I was raising around my own back then.
And I was at my office and thirty nine years
(22:27):
old and just sitting talking to a colleague and my
left foot out of nowhere went totally numb, like you
could smash it with a hammer. And I wouldn't feel it,
and I'm like, well, that's weird. My fot's a little numb.
Shortly after, within seconds, the numbness went up my calf,
to my knee, to my thigh and now here, I am,
my leg is like rigid in like stupor, like the
(22:50):
deepest sleep numbness you could feel. And it kept growing
up the left side of my body, to my orso
and then to my left arm. And at this time
I thought I was having a stroke, and I told
my colleague, I'm like, you got to call nine one one.
I'm either having a heart attack or a stroke. I
can't feel the left side of my body, you know.
So she freaks out, runs out in the hall to
(23:12):
dial nine to one to one, and then within about
forty five seconds to a minute, it just all receded
and went back and I was back to normal.
Speaker 3 (23:23):
Now I want to pause.
Speaker 2 (23:25):
I want to pause here because you know that that
is freaky. That I mean, I can I can super
picture you thinking, oh my god, almost I'm I'm I
got my daughter. I can't.
Speaker 3 (23:38):
I can't have a stroke.
Speaker 2 (23:39):
I am dying.
Speaker 3 (23:41):
I can't die. So Derek, stay.
Speaker 2 (23:43):
With us, because what you learned was a game changer
in your life, but it brought a lot of purpose
to your life. So everybody more with Derek SYDERIACI shortly
stay with us. It is so amazing what comes ahead.
Speaker 3 (23:58):
Stay with us today.
Speaker 16 (24:04):
In school, I learned a lot. In chemistry, I learned
that no one likes me. In English, I learned that
I'm disgusting, and in Physics, I learned that I'm a loser.
Speaker 17 (24:16):
Today, in school, I learned that I'm ugly and useless.
In jim I learned that I'm pathetic in a joke.
In History today, I learned that I'm trying.
Speaker 4 (24:26):
Today.
Speaker 18 (24:26):
In school, I learned that I have no friends. In English,
I learned that I make people sick, and at lunch
I learned that I sit on my own because I smell.
In chemistry, I learned.
Speaker 17 (24:38):
That no one In Biology, I learned that I'm fat
and stupid, And in math I learned that I'm trash.
Speaker 16 (24:46):
The only thing I didn't learn in school today, The
only thing I didn't learn today.
Speaker 3 (24:49):
The only thing I didn't learn is why no one.
Speaker 19 (24:52):
Ever helps kids witness bullying every day. They want to help,
but they don't know how teach them how to stop
bullying and be more than a bystander at Stop Bullying
dot gov. A message from the AD Council.
Speaker 2 (25:04):
I'm Nancy Silary, certified Life and Business Coach. I want
to invite you to the Personal Development boot Camp. During
the boot camp, we're.
Speaker 20 (25:11):
Going to be looking at taking those insecurities that you
have and getting rid of them. We're also going to
look at ways in which you can thrive and live
a life full of purpose. Go to Livingfullout dot com
forward Slash boot Camp Livingfullout dot com Forward Slash boot
Camp to sign up. I believe in you and here's
to you living your life full out.
Speaker 21 (25:40):
They'll challenge your authority.
Speaker 5 (25:42):
I know.
Speaker 21 (25:44):
They'll try to break your will. They'll push you to
the edge of your sanity because that's what kids do.
But this car is your territory, not theirs. Defend it.
Who makes the payment, who cleans it, who drives it?
(26:05):
You do, That's who And in here your word is law.
So when you say you won't move until everyone's buckled up,
you won't budge an inch until you hear that clear.
Never give up until they buckle up. A message from
(26:26):
the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration and the ad Council.
For more information, visit safercar dot gov. Slash kids buckle up.
Speaker 12 (26:34):
Seven million children suffer from asthma, more than any other
chronic disease. Most asthma attacks are caused by allergic reactions
to allergens, including those left behind by cockroaches and mice.
In fact, eighty two percent of US households contain mouse allergens,
and cockroaches are found in up to ninety eight percent
of urban homes. How can you protect your family find
(26:56):
out at pestworld dot org. A message from the National
Pest Management Association and the American College of Allergy, Asthma,
and Immunology.
Speaker 10 (27:04):
It's slipping, coffit CHECKI cop to doctor.
Speaker 21 (27:07):
Knowlne share.
Speaker 11 (27:08):
I get it, slip it, cuff it, check it. Twice
a day, I get it, slip it, cuff it, check
it in the morning and before dinner. I get it,
flip it, cuff it, check it, and share it with
my doctor. Nearly one in two US adults have high
blood pressure. That's why it's important to self monitor your
blood pressure and for easy to remember steps. It starts
(27:30):
with a monitor.
Speaker 17 (27:31):
Now that I know my blood pressure numbers, I talked
with my doctor.
Speaker 6 (27:35):
We're getting those numbers down.
Speaker 4 (27:36):
Yeah, it's slipping.
Speaker 13 (27:37):
Coffit check cop to doctor knowlne share.
Speaker 11 (27:41):
Be next to talk to your doctor about your blood
pressure numbers. Get down with your blood pressure. Self monitoring
is power. Learn more at Manage your BP dot org.
Brought to you by the AD Council, the American Heart Association,
and the American Medical Association in partnership with the Office
of Minority Health and Health Resources and Services Administration.
Speaker 1 (28:04):
You're listening to Living Full Out with Nancy Solari. With
Nancy's expertise, you'll learn how to embrace your potential and
strive for success. If you have a question or need
further support, send us an email at connect at Livingfoullout
dot com. Now here's Nancy.
Speaker 2 (28:22):
Thank you so much for joining us today. I'm Nancy
Silari and this is the Living Full Out Show, and
today we're talking about exceeding expectations and we are continuing
our conversation here at Derek Stafuriak. And honestly, one of
the things, Derek that I think is just so impressive
is how you kind of took that moment when you
(28:45):
know your foot was going numb. It was your arms
were going numb, your leg is going numb, you think
you're having a stroke. It all of a sudden goes away.
And there would have been actually a lot of people
that would have just said that was weird and went
on in their day, like I've got a lot to do,
because a lot of people put their health on the
(29:05):
back burner. But you didn't do that. You were insistent
of somebody's got to take me to the doctor. And
when they took you, what did they find out?
Speaker 15 (29:15):
Well, for that first appointment, they didn't find out. They
referred me to a neurologist. And then I went to
one neurologist. He thought it might be my grains. That
didn't like. I know, I'm not a medical doctor, but
it didn't feel like, man, I want to get a
second opinion. That doesn't make a lot of sense to
me in that And after a second opinion and some
(29:38):
more testing, I was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis.
Speaker 2 (29:43):
And that that is terrifying. I mean, I actually have
a really good friend who has it. It can be
so many different It's not the same for everybody, right,
the symptoms are similar bit different. Yeah, had you known
what that was? I mean, or did that just sound
like noise, Like what is that?
Speaker 15 (30:00):
Oh well, I didn't know. I had heard of it,
of course, but no one in my family or my
circle of friends or coworkers or anything has MS or
so I just knew it was one of those incurable
diseases that they abbreviate with letters. That's real bad. That's
all that was my feeling, like, oh man, I don't
know what this is, but I know it's not good,
(30:21):
you know.
Speaker 2 (30:21):
And and for those of us are an audience who
may not know what MS is, can you share with
us what it is? But also you know where the
lesions were on your body?
Speaker 15 (30:34):
Yeah, yeah, for sure. It's a it's an autoimmune disease
where my white blood cells are attacking my nervous system
and eating away kind of the insulation around the nerves,
which makes communication between your brain and the rest of
your parts more difficult. And that's why a lot of
the problems with MSS. People have trouble walking, have a
(30:56):
lot of trouble swallowing, vision, problems going to the through,
problems like a whole post of things that your nervous
system controls. And it's all these scars that occur in
your brain and in your spinal cord and in mind.
They noticed like a jelly bean sized scar right and
(31:16):
at the top of my spinal cord, and that was
making a communication to the left side of my body harder.
Speaker 22 (31:23):
And it's you know, wow, yeah.
Speaker 3 (31:27):
I mean that that is scary. Again.
Speaker 2 (31:29):
You've got your daughter to take care of, You've got
bills to pay, right, and what.
Speaker 3 (31:34):
Is this going to look like?
Speaker 2 (31:36):
And truly, at that time, you were still smoking, right,
you were kind of doing all your good and bad behaviors.
And what I find is so interesting, though, is you
decided to give up smoking. But it was because of
the words of your doctor. What did he say to you?
Speaker 15 (31:55):
Oh, he said, the fastest way to a wheelchair for
you it is to continue smoking. And this was powerful.
I mean yeah, that really scared me more than more
than anything, even more than the incident of half my numbness.
I thought, Man, I'm so much to do, and I
(32:19):
my daughter's eight years old, you know, and I just
that motivated me like nothing else. I quit smoking, started jogging,
And when I started jogging, I realized that I had
a limb. I never jogged, so I didn't know I
had this MS symptom of my left leg not really
working well until I tried to start jogging, and after
(32:41):
about five ten minutes of running, my leg would get
very weak and drag behind me, like like egor going
to get brains, you know, just this leg trying to
pull my leg behind me. And I remember thinking right away,
like this is that wheelchair calling you? Like it was
(33:03):
almost like if you could imagine a figurative wheelchair grabbing
my leg and holding me back, like come on, we're
sitting you down and I'm trying to run, like no way, dude,
We're going forward. Wow.
Speaker 2 (33:18):
You know, Derek, I can hear that emotion in your
voice because it really could have gone either way. It
really could have been a life sentence in that wheelchair
if you had not given up smoking, if you had
not tooken taken the initiative to run even when your
leg was dragging. And I think sometimes it's so easy
(33:40):
in life to.
Speaker 3 (33:41):
Just give up.
Speaker 2 (33:41):
It's so easy to settle, and you were not going
to do that.
Speaker 3 (33:45):
And again, you.
Speaker 2 (33:47):
Know the mysterious sides of life. Right, Having your daughter
in your life gave you that purpose. That boy in
sixth grade was hungry for winning hungry for purpose. The
comedian in you was hungry to inspire, to make a difference.
(34:07):
But sure enough, running actually led you down your path
of purpose in what way?
Speaker 15 (34:15):
Well, at first it was you know, running running to walk,
like your first swim lesson is just don't run, you know,
and then you can get on to whatever different kind
of things. But mine was I remember thinking like, all right,
my leg's weak. Okay, if you just run more and
your brain is firing neurons and signals down there thousands,
(34:39):
tens of thousands of times a day, it's got to
make that connection better. And there was no in my
head when I started living like that. There was no
way that I was thinking like, all right, I guess
the mess has me. I might as well sit back
and see what the pharmaceuticals can do. Because it's over.
I can't run. I never thought that, you know. I
(35:00):
just kept focused forward and we're going to do this.
Speaker 2 (35:05):
But I mean, today you've run how many marathons? I
mean seriously, you went from like limping to what.
Speaker 15 (35:12):
Yes, to you know what? Tomorrow I'm going to run
the Chicago Marathon and that is will be my forty
second twenty six point two mile run marathon.
Speaker 2 (35:26):
Yeah, I mean that's impressive seven years. One of my
very favorite movies is Forrest Gump, and I feel like
I'm talking to to Derek and Forrest at the same time.
Speaker 15 (35:39):
Really, I feel that way.
Speaker 7 (35:41):
Derek.
Speaker 15 (35:42):
Yeah, I even have images of like, you know, when
he's a little kid and he runs and the braces,
the braces are breaking off of his legs, you know,
a little longer for me. But uh uh, I really
felt it that way, like I had broken through in
just the joy of even being able to run.
Speaker 2 (36:03):
Now along the path here though, because you have, you know,
become healthier, and you've done so much and you know
you're running and you're just doing it despite still having
MS that hasn't gone away. It would be so easy
to stop injections, stop the medications. And you even contemplated that.
(36:25):
And I think a lot of people sometimes, you know,
give up on taking their pills. Oh no, I'm fine,
I'm over it.
Speaker 15 (36:31):
I'm good.
Speaker 3 (36:32):
Why have you not?
Speaker 17 (36:33):
Yeah?
Speaker 15 (36:35):
Uh, Because I don't know, That's the thing. I really
don't know. I wish sometimes I wish there was ten
different alternate universes and I could just run in this universe,
or I could just take my medicine in this universe,
or if I could just eat well in this one,
if I could, you know, and all these different things
to see what it is. But in the end it
(36:57):
you know, we can't do that. And since I don't know,
I'm going to do everything I can. Whatever I'm doing
right now, the combination of everything is working so well
that it's a little scary to try to not do that.
Speaker 2 (37:11):
I think it's smart. If it's what's the old saying,
if it's not broken, don't fix it.
Speaker 3 (37:16):
Yeah, right, And again, you're no stranger to crowds.
Speaker 2 (37:22):
Right there you were dancing doing your comedy, you know,
surrounded by beautiful women, right and you know again that
the cheering of you playing sports as a little guy.
Even though that you had that one moment, right you,
still we were doing it. Oh yeah, but you got
somebody reached out to you not too long ago who
(37:43):
heard about your MS story and that touched you.
Speaker 6 (37:47):
Why.
Speaker 15 (37:50):
Ah, you know, for most of the time where I was,
you know, doing my running and getting my health better,
it was all just just me, you know, And I
didn't even know if people were noticing. It wasn't even
a thing. It was just like, Hey, this is really
working for me and this is really great. And I
(38:10):
almost wish my doctor would ask me like, hey, you
need to tell people, you know, let's let's dive into
more of your health type of stuff. And I don't know,
it didn't really happen that way. This person that reached
out to me, I guess it really touched me deeply
because this lady had been diagnosed with MS just before
(38:34):
reaching out to me, Like she got home from her
doctor appointment with that diagnosis, she went on to Google
and she typed in the MS two like to to marathon,
and in her head was like, yeah, I wonder if
I could warn a marathon or MS as that affects that.
And she saw an article about me, reached out to
me and we started talking and I don't it just
(38:56):
touches my heart. She told me that she was really
depressed and then she read my story and had a
lot of hope and yeah, it's just powerful feeling.
Speaker 3 (39:13):
You know.
Speaker 2 (39:13):
It's it's interesting how in life it isn't about a
home run as a six year old sixth grade I mean,
and it isn't about you know, being on stage and
looking good and being the star, right it's more important
about knowing that you're impacting someone else's life. I mean,
(39:34):
wouldn't you say, that's the greatest applause you could have?
Speaker 15 (39:39):
You know, I used to think the best feeling was
making a crowd laugh, even just another person just joking around.
That bills me so full of dopamine or whatever chemical
it is. But I'd say having someone tell you that
inspire them and give them hope. That what was the
laughter thing out of the water. It's such a a
(40:02):
whole body is flooded with whatever these feel good things are.
That my eyes. I'm crying right now.
Speaker 2 (40:08):
Perfect I know you are, I know you are.
Speaker 22 (40:11):
You know what.
Speaker 2 (40:13):
MS picked on the wrong man. But in some ways
it was a great gift. Look at all the purpose
at birthed, and I am so proud of you, and
our entire community will google you, will look you up,
we'll cheer you on. And I so appreciate you sharing
your story with us today. Thank you so much, Thank you, Ansie, really,
(40:36):
thank you. Here's a tissue, okay, And for everybody we
are going to be coming right back and today it
is about exceeding expectations. Just when you think you know
what you're meant to do. Put on that seat belt,
because life will guide you just like a magnet. You
will be guided to what you're meant to do in life,
(40:56):
and then you're living full out.
Speaker 3 (40:59):
Stay with us.
Speaker 9 (41:06):
To some people, the sound of a baby babbling doesn't
mean much, but that's not necessarily true. By six months,
they're combining vowels and consonants talk, By nine months, they're
trying out different kinds of sounds, and by twelve months
(41:28):
they're babbling. Is beginning to take on some meaning, man,
especially if there's no babbling at all. Little to no
babbling by twelve months or later is just one of
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intervention can make a lifetime of difference and unlock a
(41:49):
world of possibilities. Take the first step at Autism speaks
dot org, a public service announcement brought to you by
Autism Speaks and the Aduncil.
Speaker 23 (42:01):
Most of us like to be out in the sun.
That's why sunscreen and other safety measures are key to
protecting your skin from aging and cancer. The FDA recommends
using a sunscreen with a sun protection factor or SPF
A fifteen or higher. Also look for broad spectrum.
Speaker 6 (42:17):
On the label.
Speaker 23 (42:18):
That means both harmful ultraviolet A and B rays are block.
UVA rays age the skin. UVB rays burn and both
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use it wrong. Don't need sunscreen on a cloudy day? Wrong,
eighty percent of UV rays still get through the haze.
Only use sunscreen at the beach, Nope, anytime you're outside,
(42:41):
UB rays attack the skin, so you need protection and
you have to reapply sunscreen every two hours. Remember SPF
plus broad spectrum he for healthy fun in the sun.
Visit www dot FDA dot gov slash sunscreen for more information.
A message from the US Food and Drug admans.
Speaker 24 (43:01):
Right now, our country feels divided, but there's a place
where people are coming together.
Speaker 15 (43:06):
I gotta tell you. I was nervous to talk to
someone so different than me.
Speaker 3 (43:10):
Me too, But I'm glad you are.
Speaker 24 (43:12):
Love has no labels and one small step are helping
people with different political views, beliefs, and life experiences come
together through conversation and it feels good.
Speaker 15 (43:21):
Wow, your story is so interesting.
Speaker 5 (43:24):
Yeah.
Speaker 24 (43:26):
When people actually sit down, talk and listen to one another,
they can break down boundaries and connect as human beings.
At Love Hasno Labels dot com slash one small Step,
you can listen to amazing, life changing conversations and find
simple tools to start a conversation of your own.
Speaker 3 (43:42):
I know one thing.
Speaker 15 (43:42):
This conversation gives me hope.
Speaker 24 (43:44):
It gives me a lot of hope to take a
step toward bringing our country and your community together by
having the courage to start a conversation. At Love has
No Labels dot com slash one small Step. A message
from story Core Love has No Labels and the ad Council.
Speaker 6 (44:02):
All right, grew, Let's get her dug.
Speaker 7 (44:07):
Honey, you want to give me a hand.
Speaker 6 (44:08):
I'm planning that tree you remember.
Speaker 22 (44:10):
No matter how large or small your digging project may be,
no matter how urban or rural, you must always call
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(44:32):
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do this or this, make sure you do this. For
(44:54):
digging projects big or small, make the call to eight
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Speaker 2 (45:02):
When it comes to exceeding expectations, you want to go
after life with vigor, with heart, and you want to
know that although things may not always land and turn
out exactly like you expected, what's riddled in there is
the unexpected and sometimes those are the biggest treasures of
all because maybe, just maybe you're meant to be and
(45:24):
do something that isn't top of mind, something that you
haven't planned, and your greatest rewards are right ahead of
you as you live full out.
Speaker 1 (45:37):
You're listening to Living Full Out with Nancy Solary. As
a professional motivational speaker. Nancy can assist you to blow
through your setbacks and start living full out. If you
have an inspirational story you want to share, email us
at connect at livingfullout dot com. Once again, here's Nancy.
Speaker 2 (45:57):
It is so nice to be here with all of
you today, Nancy Silary, and this is the Living Full
Out Show, and today we're talking about exceeding expectations and
I'll tell you what it's really humbling actually to be
sometimes me because in my world obviously I'm here with
you doing this show. And it's sometimes interesting because behind
(46:20):
the scenes, I have to do a lot of prep work.
I will research my guests, I'll watch videos of them,
I'll sometimes talk to them ahead of time, but I've
got to have their story in my brain from A
to Z because I can't look at note cards being
legally blind, and quite frankly, I always want to make
sure that every interview is truly a conversation, just the
(46:44):
two of us hanging out talking out their life's journey.
But it does take with prep and even when I'm
out and about and some of you may or may
not know, I actually host two TV shows. One is
nonprofit MVP. You can go to nonprofit at MVP dot
com to learn more about that, or the Living Full
Out TV show, and that is The Livingfulloutshow dot com.
(47:08):
And what's kind of fascinating about doing the TV shows
is you know, around me there's multiple cameras, there's a
production team, there's hair and makeup and all these things
that man, I wish I could see it, but I can't.
And it's always kind of interesting, especially when I'm in
hair makeup and somebody's like, oh wow, that looks great,
(47:30):
or I love the eyes, and I'm thinking, man, I
wish I could see it. But life isn't about seeing
literally scene. It's about soaking up the moment. It's what
you hear, it's what you taste, it's what you smell,
it's what you touch. All of those build the moments.
So even though I can't see the cameras, the crew,
(47:53):
the makeup, I can hear the laughter. I can hear
people saying, oh my gosh, I'm so excited or that
was so fun, or I want to do it again.
Speaker 3 (48:03):
You know, I can.
Speaker 2 (48:04):
I can hold the camera, I can, you know, touch
the mic. And that experience, believe it or not, is
just as grand as if I could see it. But
there is this little thing called expectations, right that we
have for ourselves and sometimes what others have for us.
And I know that when I pop down in that chair,
(48:26):
and sometimes oftentimes when we're doing shows, I mean I
might sit down and interview five people in a row,
and that's you know, anywhere between five to six hours
in a chair interviewing, and I'm present with the person.
I'm interviewing again, I'm hearing, I'm tasting, I'm smelling everything
around me. But then I get done with the day
(48:47):
and I turn around to you know who, my staff,
and I'll be like, gosh, what how'd it go? Which
show is your favorite? And how did I do? And
you know, could have done anything differently because I always
want to cut up my game and be the best
I can be, right, and you know, I get different
answers and different words of advice and tips. And then
(49:08):
it isn't until after editing that I get emailed the episodes,
and that is a moment that is I'm kind of
on the edge of my seat. I'm kind of nervous
because I have these expectations for what I hope it
came out to be. How I sounded, how I did,
did the guests have an emotional moment? Did we laugh
or would we have a good time? And if I
(49:30):
was the audience, if I was you, would I even
enjoy it? And sometimes we have to be on that
edge of our seat. We have to sometimes go back
and rather than holding on to the expectations of the moment,
actually going back after and rewatching ourselves listening. It's really humbling,
(49:51):
I'll tell you. But I sit there and I and
I'm almost smiling inside because I think of ten year
old Nancy who had this dream watching Oprah doing her
talk show, thinking, boy, wouldn't that be great? Would that
be a great career. I wonder how she got that gig.
Now I'm just a ten year old, you know, enjoying
(50:12):
my ice cream, thinking I want to do that when
I'm older, you know. And so it is interesting sometimes
when I'm watching the episodes back after they've been edited
and ready for airing, and I smiled because I think, wow,
I have exceeded my expectations. I can't see it. I'm
just listening to it, smelling it, tasting it, touching it,
(50:35):
but it is. It's the wildest dreams that that ten
year old could have ever imagined. And I want you
to think about where in your life are you living
your wildest dreams. Is there something that you always wanted
to do growing up? Is there a hobby that you
once had that life got busy and you kind of
let that go. I really encourage you today to be
(50:59):
the day that you pick that hobby back up, that
you say to yourself, well, gosh, it's never too late
to be, It's never too late to try. And then
even when you do those hobbies, you take those actions
in life rather than just letting them roll by. I
promise you, I want you to have someone record it,
(51:21):
tape it, I want someone to write about it, and
then I want you to go back and relive it.
And I guarantee you you are going to be so
proud and you're going to exceed your own expectations. Now
make sure that beyond today's show that you go to
the Living Full Out Show app. It's in the app store,
because we want to make sure that you are motivated
(51:42):
at the gym, in the car, on a road trip. Also,
we want to hear from you. If you have an
inspirational story and would like to be a guest on
the show, reach out to us at connect at livingfollout
dot com. Let us know what you went through, how
you got through it, most of all, what you learned,
and of course your contact information, and we'd love to
(52:02):
get in touch with you and perhaps have you as
an inspirational guest on the show. Please know that I
believe in you so much. I know every day gets
a little bit twisting in its own way.
Speaker 3 (52:13):
But you can do this.
Speaker 2 (52:15):
You can live full out.
Speaker 1 (52:27):
Thank you for listening to the Living full Out Show
with Nancy Silari. To learn more about this program, visit
livingfullout dot com for the latest episodes. Connect with the
Living full Out community by following us on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram,
and subscribing to our YouTube channel. Here's to you, Living
full Out.
You're listening the Living Full Out with Nancy Solari. As
a professional motivational speaker, Nancy can assist you to blow
through your setbacks and start living full out. If you
have an inspirational story you want to share, email us
at connect at livingfollout dot com. Once again, here's Nancy.
Speaker 2 (00:19):
Welcome to the Living Full Out Show. My name is
Nancy Solari, and today we'll be talking about exceeding expectations. Now,
sometimes those are what others want us to do or
be or become right. But other times we put these
little weights of the world on our own shoulders. We
have large aspirations and I think the winning moments are
(00:41):
what we learn along the way. Even the times we
fail are times that we can rebound and climb back
to the top of that mountain and say we did it,
we conquered it.
Speaker 3 (00:51):
But today we are going to be.
Speaker 2 (00:53):
Talking about expectations and how to make sure that they're
serving us, not pulling us backwards, but leaving us into
an inspirational place. Now, our inspirational guests coming up, though,
Derek Steffree act he is amazing, okay to have multiple
sclerosis but yet be a runner that is not common
(01:14):
and his journey is one where running was not always
his thing, but he found that it gave him clarity,
It helped him to get to know his body better.
And I think as we all go through this journey
of life, we want to be more centered, we want
to kind of feel comfortable in our skin, and he
is a great example of that. So you're really gonna
(01:34):
love his interview. I want to make sure though, that
beyond today's show, that you know that you can go
to the app store and get the Living Full Out
Show app. It's free and listen to us anytime you want.
Will be right there beside you every step of the
way in your motivational journey. And also if you want,
go to our website, Livingfullout dot com. We've got the
(01:54):
twenty four hour station and you can listen to shows
over and over again.
Speaker 3 (01:58):
If you're just.
Speaker 2 (01:59):
Doing some domestic duties around the house, will be there
to keep you inspired. Now, our producer is reaching out
to me. Here, we have a caller in the line.
Let's go check in with them. Hello, welcome to the
Living Full Out Show.
Speaker 4 (02:11):
Hi Nancy, I'm Megan. I had a question. I recently
got a new job and so I'm moving, So I
was wondering what advice do you have for making a
new place or a new city or town feel more
like home and more comfortable, especially when you don't start
with like a big social networker knowing a lot of people.
Speaker 2 (02:35):
Well, first of all, congratulations on the new job. That
is so exciting. What are you going to be doing.
Speaker 4 (02:43):
I'm a nurse, So I got a new job on
a surgical oncology for Okay.
Speaker 2 (02:49):
Well, if I need a nurse, I know where to
find one, right, thank you for a Megan. Yeah, okay, Well,
so here's the thing. I actually am quite a bit
of an expert at this moving thing because I've done
that a lot myself. And you know, there's many different
ways that you can meet people. Of course, if you
go to a church, or you go to a community center,
(03:10):
or if you you know, want to join the clubs
of some kind. There's a site that I've used quite
a bit called meetup dot com. Have you heard about that? Yeah, okay,
so meetup dot com and there's other ones like it
that's just been around a long long time, and you
can go on there and you can find groups of
(03:30):
different hobbies that you have, like I'm a karaoke nut,
and so there was a time a couple of years
back where I was just kind of looking to open
up my friendship base, kind of like you are, and
I went and found some karaoke groups and now they
are some of my best friends.
Speaker 3 (03:46):
And you can do.
Speaker 2 (03:47):
Cooking groups and volleyball whatever it is that you want
to do. And the other thing too is being open
to people talking to you. And what I mean by
that is you're not going to know anyone. And I know,
when you go to eat, it might be tempting to
talk on the phone to you know, a friend that
you've had talked to in a while from your old
you know, your old hometown. But if you go eat
(04:10):
and you're on the phone, you're less approachable. And so
I find that when I've gone to New towns, it
really helps to just kind of not be on the phone,
maybe read a looking at a book, or you know,
allow yourself to have somebody to come up to you
and say hi, you know, welcome. You know is that
you know is this seat taken right? Who knows? You
(04:32):
might get a friend and a significant other all in one,
you know what I mean. The other thing too is
be bold to make friends at work. You know, it
wasn't too long ago in my neighborhood that I was
and this is I've lived here for a while. But
there was a gal and I was trying to do
something and she helped me get this really large box
(04:55):
into a trash can and I could have gone easily
on my way. I found out in doing that that
she had just moved there, and I was like, hey, would.
Speaker 3 (05:04):
You like to exchange numbers?
Speaker 2 (05:06):
You want to go to lunch now that I lived here,
But I was gifting kind of that alive branch that
you know, I'm happy to be your friend. And it
can be on the reverse. You can go to work
and you can meet people, but if you don't put
yourself out there, they're not going to know. So you
could say to somebody, hey, I'm trying to get to
know some new places here. You know, anybody available on
(05:29):
the weekend, I'd love to go on a hike. I'd
love to check out a new restaurant. And you know,
sure enough, someone is going to say, yeah, I'd love
to do that. But you just kind of kind of
put yourself out there. What is it about going to
this new town that intimidates you the most.
Speaker 4 (05:47):
I don't know. I think I am more kind of
a person who likes to remain to themselves a little bit,
and so I've kind of worked a little bit last
few years to branch out and open up to more
people and stuff. But I think it's also just going
to a different state and kind of a different region
in the country that I'm maybe not used to and
(06:09):
not used to kind of I guess the vibe.
Speaker 2 (06:13):
Well, and do you have any hobbies that you enjoy?
Speaker 4 (06:17):
Yeah, I like to read, and I like running and
stuff like that.
Speaker 2 (06:21):
So so it's possible that there's running groups, yeah, right,
group book clubs.
Speaker 3 (06:28):
Right.
Speaker 2 (06:29):
And the thing is, sometimes when you go to a
new city, you don't want to have to be on
right that on moment. Right, It's okay to let yourself
kind of wander around, you know, kind of soak up
the new vibe, right, the culture of the area, and
(06:50):
don't put so much pressure on yourself that you have
to acclimate so quickly and personally. I mean, this could
be your forever location. You might move again, right, you
might find yourself even moving home. So I would just
try to look at this less intimidating less scary and
(07:12):
more as an adventure, and you know, keep your eye
on the ball of why you're there in the first place.
You're there because of nursing, and why did you go
into nursing.
Speaker 4 (07:28):
I like helping people, and I enjoy the person aspect
of nursing, but along with that, I like the like healthcare,
sciencey side of it. So it was kind of a
best of both worlds of a lot of people interaction
and helping people feel better while also learn a lot
about medicine.
Speaker 3 (07:48):
And you know, it's interesting.
Speaker 2 (07:51):
We've interviewed a lot of guests over the years, and
so many of our guests who have been in hospital
and rehabilitation centers, the nurses, the doctors, but mainly the
nurses oftentimes have become like very good friends of theirs.
And I actually think given the industry, given the lane
(08:15):
that you're in, and how when somebody's at their most vulnerable,
you know you're there for them, you're their their line
of support. I actually think you're going to learn a
lot about your new town. I think you know, as
you move along, you're going to find that you know,
some of these patients that you work on may even
(08:36):
be your friends.
Speaker 3 (08:38):
But just keep your.
Speaker 2 (08:38):
Mind open, keep your heart open, keep that sense of adventure.
Even if you're not the loudest person in the room,
you know, just kind of absorb this time. Time goes
so fast and something is leading you there. It may
be the purpose of being a nurse and the impact
(08:59):
that you're going to make all the patients that you serve.
It may be that your best friend of all the times,
of all the friends you've ever known, your best friend
is there. You just haven't met that person yet yet.
It might mean that there's love waiting for you there,
you just don't know it yet. So sometimes when we
move to a new town, it's kind of this, I
(09:21):
wonder what's going to happen. I'm so excited to see
what's going to happen, right, So go into it with
that excitement, and I think kind of the nerves and
the loneliness will will dissipate over time. But let that excitement,
that zest for life and adventure be er your go to. Okay, hell,
(09:43):
thank you so much for calling in and again check
out that meetup dot com.
Speaker 3 (09:47):
I think you'll really enjoy it.
Speaker 4 (09:48):
Okay, well, do thank you so much.
Speaker 3 (09:50):
You got it.
Speaker 2 (09:51):
I actually really appreciate that she asked that question, because
the thing is, it can be intimidating when we have
change happening in our life, when we feel like, okay,
everything is like stable and good in my life, and
then all of a sudden switch, something new happens and
we have to, you know, kind of pivot. But I
(10:12):
also look at those as opportunities for how inspiration can
come into your life in the most unexpected ways. So
when we talk today about exceeding our expectations, part of
that is getting out of our shells, out of our boxes,
coloring outside the lines from time to time, because you
want to make sure that life is playful, that it's fun,
(10:35):
that you always keep in your heart, that inquisitive side,
that laughter, that desire to want to go out there
and just live up life to all it can be.
So we'll be coming right back with Derek Stefuriac again,
a story you don't want to miss.
Speaker 3 (10:52):
Stay tuned.
Speaker 5 (11:01):
Life looks a little different during these times. We're doing
our best to keep our minds and bodies strong, and
getting a flu shot helps us stay healthy so we
don't miss out on what matters, like having game night
at home. Yeah, can't do that, we'll sick with the flu.
(11:24):
Now imagine family movie night that your daughter can't live without. Well,
that's ruined. And don't forget your uncle's socially distanced cookouts.
See that's why it's important to be at our strongest.
(11:45):
Every year, millions of people in the US get the flu,
especially now. No one has time to miss out on
moments that matter. So get your flu shot. Find out
more and get my flu shot dot org. Brought to
you by the AMA CDC and the AD Council.
Speaker 6 (12:00):
Don't you wish your life came with a warning app?
Speaker 7 (12:03):
Stop that dog does not want to be pettitive.
Speaker 6 (12:07):
Just a little heads up before something bad happens.
Speaker 7 (12:10):
Move your coffee cup away from your computer.
Speaker 2 (12:13):
Oh no, no, no.
Speaker 6 (12:14):
No, so you can have more control.
Speaker 7 (12:16):
Stop you're texting your boss by mistakes.
Speaker 8 (12:21):
Oh well, life doesn't always give you time to change
the outcome, but pre diabetes does. With early diagnosis and
a few healthy changes like managing your weight, getting active,
stopping smoking, and eating healthier, you can stop pre diabetes
before it leads to type two diabetes.
Speaker 6 (12:37):
It's easy to learn your risk.
Speaker 8 (12:39):
Take the one minute test today at do I have
prediabetes dot org warning the cap.
Speaker 7 (12:44):
Is loose on that cat. Young.
Speaker 6 (12:47):
Oh don't wait.
Speaker 8 (12:48):
You have the power to change the outcome. Visit Do
I have prediabetes dot org today? That's do I have
prediabetes dot org? Brought to you by the AD Council
and its pre diabetes awareness partners.
Speaker 5 (13:00):
Hehu oh brah, that's buzzed. Oh yeah, yeah, he's starting
with the woots.
Speaker 9 (13:05):
And now a speech.
Speaker 10 (13:07):
I just want to say that friendship is about heart,
heart and brain.
Speaker 11 (13:12):
Who's with me?
Speaker 2 (13:13):
Good thing is he knows when he's buzzed, and my
brain is saying when it's time to go home, Somebody
call me a ride. Love that guy, me too.
Speaker 8 (13:21):
Know your buzzed warning signs, call for a ride when
it's time to go home.
Speaker 6 (13:25):
Buzz Driving is drunk driving. A message for NITZA and
the AD Council. True what you're out?
Speaker 7 (13:34):
You got me?
Speaker 12 (13:35):
Galaxy safe once again.
Speaker 13 (13:38):
In the pretend universe, kids play with pretend guns. In
the real world, it's up to us to make sure
they don't get their hands on a real gun. If
you have a gun in the house, keep it locked, unloaded,
and storage separately from ammunition. Safegun storage saves lives. Learn
how to make your home safeer it Nfamilyfire dot Org.
That's Nfamilyfire dot Org. Brought to you by N Familyfire,
Brady and the AD Council.
Speaker 14 (13:59):
Adopt Us Kids presents what to expect when you're expecting
a teenager learning the.
Speaker 10 (14:05):
Lingo Today, I'm going to help parents translate teen slang. Now,
when a teen says something is on fleek, it's exactly
like saying that's rad. It simply means that something is
awesome or cool. Another one is toats. It's exactly like
saying totally, just shorter, as in I totes love going
(14:27):
to the mall with Becca. Another word you might hear
is jelly. Jelly is a shorter, better way to say jealous,
as in Chloe, I am like so jelly of your
unicorn phone case.
Speaker 14 (14:39):
You don't have to speak teen to be a perfect parent.
Thousands of teens in foster care will think you're rad
just the same. To learn more, visit adopt us Kids
dot org. A public service announcement brought to you by
the US Department of Health and Human Services, adopt Us Kids,
and the AD Council.
Speaker 1 (15:00):
You're listening to living full out with Nancy Soilary. As
a life coach, Nancy can teach you how to stay
strong under pressure and work through challenges you face. Being
legally blind, Nancy inspires others to be resilient and overcoming
obstacles and live full out. You could ask Nancy for
advice in your life on relationships, finance, business, health, and more.
(15:22):
Just call in at eight hundred three three three zero
zero zero one. Once again, that's eight hundred three three
three zero zero zero one. Now here's Nancy.
Speaker 2 (15:33):
Welcome back. I'm Nancy Silary and this is the Living
Full Out Show, and today we're talking about exceeding expectations.
And as promised, I brought your inspirational guest today, Derek Stifuriac.
And I don't want to give his whole journey away,
but I'll let you know it's relatable and in some
cases maybe not. You'll know what I mean. Welcome Derek
to the show.
Speaker 3 (15:54):
Thank you, so happy to have you.
Speaker 7 (15:57):
Now.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
I would have loved to have been friends with you know,
growing up. But most of all I think of that
sixth grade you you know what I'm talking about, championship
in baseball, The moment, oh, the big moment.
Speaker 3 (16:12):
Yes, and you stuck out, not.
Speaker 15 (16:14):
Only struck out, took a called third strike. I didn't
even swing.
Speaker 2 (16:19):
Ugh, And okay, I'm not bringing this to you on
the interview to make you feel bad years later. But
the truth is moments like that, isn't it interesting how
they just stay with us, Like why can't we let
them go? Why can't we just let that little boy
(16:40):
run and have a good time? But the truth is
you you, even at that age, wanted to taste success.
You wanted to taste winning. And I know that as
you went along in your life as many do you know,
fourteen on where you started drinking, you start smoking. Yeah,
(17:02):
had a bit of a rough patch with driving under
the influence. How many of those did you get in college?
Speaker 15 (17:10):
Three if you can believe it, three times? Yeah, wow, Yeah,
at age eighteen, at age nineteen, and at age twenty
twenty one. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (17:22):
So when you were kind of in that moment, I'm
sure your parents were not super proud at that moment.
And here you are, here, you are, you know, just
trying to figure out like what am I meant to do?
What am I meant to be? What I think is
interesting is comedy was always you know, you were kind
of the jokester and a little little kiddo, right joking
(17:42):
throughout your life. And you decided although your parents wanted
you to get a degree, and you got a degree,
finally you stopped drinking.
Speaker 3 (17:50):
You got a degree in engineering, but.
Speaker 2 (17:53):
You decided, I want to bite that apple, I want
to taste my dream. What made you finally switch from
engineering to comedy.
Speaker 15 (18:02):
It'd been in my head since as far back as
I can remember that all I loved doing was making
people laugh, and that I just wanted to be a comedian.
I wanted to be like David Letterman, like hosts that
Late Night with Derek Spiiak and all that. But I
went through college and did all that, and my parents
(18:22):
told me I could always fall back on it. And
when I was twenty six, there was a stand up
comedy club that offered a stand up comedy class and
at the end of the class you would do your
five minute bit. And I did that, and man, it
totally opened my It was so exhilarating and so like
I felt like this is what I was meant to do.
(18:42):
That I started working more on comedy, and eventually a
year later, I got to quit my job to do
this college game show, tour around to different universities and
do a little kind of a game show for kids
in the dorms. But it was performing in that And
(19:03):
after that I met up with a guy who had
an act and we ended up traveling all over the
world and it ended up landed me in Las Vegas,
a two person comedy act. It was more variety comedy
where we dressed up like in little costumes and danced around.
Speaker 2 (19:18):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (19:19):
What was the act called.
Speaker 15 (19:21):
It's called the Quiddler's qu idb l e r S.
But yeah, wow, that is today there's like a kind
of a comedy troupe that's been around for about thirty
years now.
Speaker 2 (19:32):
Wow, and you even got another gig where you're doing
the same comedy act but around burlesque dancers. I mean
that must have been kind of exotic and fun at
the same time.
Speaker 15 (19:44):
And not a bad gig for a twenty eight year
old single guy to be the comic relief in a
show with you know, a dozen French burlesque dancers.
Speaker 6 (19:52):
Yeah, could be.
Speaker 2 (19:53):
Could be harder days really, And in fact, love found
you around that time. Although you weren't boast a data dancer,
you did, but ended up.
Speaker 3 (20:03):
Having your daughter.
Speaker 2 (20:05):
And yeah, was being a father something that you thought
would be in your cards in your life.
Speaker 15 (20:12):
I yes, always in the back of my mind, but
not in the front of my mind and not when
it happened, and that kind of thing. I didn't feel
prepared and.
Speaker 2 (20:22):
That.
Speaker 15 (20:23):
But the relationship with her mother and I didn't work out.
And in the beginning there those feelings of fatherhood and
all of that stuff and taking care of my daughter
really grew like stronger than I thought. I mean I
thought real hard for custody and that kind of stuff,
and yeah, it changes you. I held my daughter right
(20:46):
when she was born and like two minutes old in
my hands and her little body there, and it really
it's powerful.
Speaker 3 (20:54):
You know, that's amazing.
Speaker 2 (20:55):
Now, you weren't in a costume in that moment, right
you were?
Speaker 13 (20:57):
You were you?
Speaker 3 (20:58):
Okay?
Speaker 2 (20:59):
No, I mean it'd be a little weird if Elvis
was holding your daughter, you mean Elis.
Speaker 15 (21:06):
But the local newspaper though.
Speaker 2 (21:09):
That part is true, always thinking, Derek, always thinking. I
admire that well. I mean, even as of today, you know,
you and I doing this interview here, you are traveling
and doing your thing, and you know, one of the
things that is so impressive about your story is just
that you are willing to try. You're willing to put
(21:30):
yourself out there. And we're talking today about exceeding expectations.
And you were always looking to be, you know, the
best father you could be, even though you it wasn't
It was unplanned, and you didn't know what it was
all going to look like and be like. And you're
saying with you know, going after comedy, you know, you
didn't know if you would be the starving comic or
(21:51):
if it would work out. And you know, if you're
having to hear a couple I told you so is
from your parents, right. But ultimately the day came when
the left side of your body went numb.
Speaker 3 (22:03):
What was that?
Speaker 15 (22:06):
Yeah? By at this time, I had gone back. I
fell back at my engineering career after my daughter was
born and I was raising her. That the nine to
five engineering job worked out a lot better for raising
a kid. I was raising around my own back then.
And I was at my office and thirty nine years
(22:27):
old and just sitting talking to a colleague and my
left foot out of nowhere went totally numb, like you
could smash it with a hammer. And I wouldn't feel it,
and I'm like, well, that's weird. My fot's a little numb.
Shortly after, within seconds, the numbness went up my calf,
to my knee, to my thigh and now here, I am,
my leg is like rigid in like stupor, like the
(22:50):
deepest sleep numbness you could feel. And it kept growing
up the left side of my body, to my orso
and then to my left arm. And at this time
I thought I was having a stroke, and I told
my colleague, I'm like, you got to call nine one one.
I'm either having a heart attack or a stroke. I
can't feel the left side of my body, you know.
So she freaks out, runs out in the hall to
(23:12):
dial nine to one to one, and then within about
forty five seconds to a minute, it just all receded
and went back and I was back to normal.
Speaker 3 (23:23):
Now I want to pause.
Speaker 2 (23:25):
I want to pause here because you know that that
is freaky. That I mean, I can I can super
picture you thinking, oh my god, almost I'm I'm I
got my daughter. I can't.
Speaker 3 (23:38):
I can't have a stroke.
Speaker 2 (23:39):
I am dying.
Speaker 3 (23:41):
I can't die. So Derek, stay.
Speaker 2 (23:43):
With us, because what you learned was a game changer
in your life, but it brought a lot of purpose
to your life. So everybody more with Derek SYDERIACI shortly
stay with us. It is so amazing what comes ahead.
Speaker 3 (23:58):
Stay with us today.
Speaker 16 (24:04):
In school, I learned a lot. In chemistry, I learned
that no one likes me. In English, I learned that
I'm disgusting, and in Physics, I learned that I'm a loser.
Speaker 17 (24:16):
Today, in school, I learned that I'm ugly and useless.
In jim I learned that I'm pathetic in a joke.
In History today, I learned that I'm trying.
Speaker 4 (24:26):
Today.
Speaker 18 (24:26):
In school, I learned that I have no friends. In English,
I learned that I make people sick, and at lunch
I learned that I sit on my own because I smell.
In chemistry, I learned.
Speaker 17 (24:38):
That no one In Biology, I learned that I'm fat
and stupid, And in math I learned that I'm trash.
Speaker 16 (24:46):
The only thing I didn't learn in school today, The
only thing I didn't learn today.
Speaker 3 (24:49):
The only thing I didn't learn is why no one.
Speaker 19 (24:52):
Ever helps kids witness bullying every day. They want to help,
but they don't know how teach them how to stop
bullying and be more than a bystander at Stop Bullying
dot gov. A message from the AD Council.
Speaker 2 (25:04):
I'm Nancy Silary, certified Life and Business Coach. I want
to invite you to the Personal Development boot Camp. During
the boot camp, we're.
Speaker 20 (25:11):
Going to be looking at taking those insecurities that you
have and getting rid of them. We're also going to
look at ways in which you can thrive and live
a life full of purpose. Go to Livingfullout dot com
forward Slash boot Camp Livingfullout dot com Forward Slash boot
Camp to sign up. I believe in you and here's
to you living your life full out.
Speaker 21 (25:40):
They'll challenge your authority.
Speaker 5 (25:42):
I know.
Speaker 21 (25:44):
They'll try to break your will. They'll push you to
the edge of your sanity because that's what kids do.
But this car is your territory, not theirs. Defend it.
Who makes the payment, who cleans it, who drives it?
(26:05):
You do, That's who And in here your word is law.
So when you say you won't move until everyone's buckled up,
you won't budge an inch until you hear that clear.
Never give up until they buckle up. A message from
(26:26):
the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration and the ad Council.
For more information, visit safercar dot gov. Slash kids buckle up.
Speaker 12 (26:34):
Seven million children suffer from asthma, more than any other
chronic disease. Most asthma attacks are caused by allergic reactions
to allergens, including those left behind by cockroaches and mice.
In fact, eighty two percent of US households contain mouse allergens,
and cockroaches are found in up to ninety eight percent
of urban homes. How can you protect your family find
(26:56):
out at pestworld dot org. A message from the National
Pest Management Association and the American College of Allergy, Asthma,
and Immunology.
Speaker 10 (27:04):
It's slipping, coffit CHECKI cop to doctor.
Speaker 21 (27:07):
Knowlne share.
Speaker 11 (27:08):
I get it, slip it, cuff it, check it. Twice
a day, I get it, slip it, cuff it, check
it in the morning and before dinner. I get it,
flip it, cuff it, check it, and share it with
my doctor. Nearly one in two US adults have high
blood pressure. That's why it's important to self monitor your
blood pressure and for easy to remember steps. It starts
(27:30):
with a monitor.
Speaker 17 (27:31):
Now that I know my blood pressure numbers, I talked
with my doctor.
Speaker 6 (27:35):
We're getting those numbers down.
Speaker 4 (27:36):
Yeah, it's slipping.
Speaker 13 (27:37):
Coffit check cop to doctor knowlne share.
Speaker 11 (27:41):
Be next to talk to your doctor about your blood
pressure numbers. Get down with your blood pressure. Self monitoring
is power. Learn more at Manage your BP dot org.
Brought to you by the AD Council, the American Heart Association,
and the American Medical Association in partnership with the Office
of Minority Health and Health Resources and Services Administration.
Speaker 1 (28:04):
You're listening to Living Full Out with Nancy Solari. With
Nancy's expertise, you'll learn how to embrace your potential and
strive for success. If you have a question or need
further support, send us an email at connect at Livingfoullout
dot com. Now here's Nancy.
Speaker 2 (28:22):
Thank you so much for joining us today. I'm Nancy
Silari and this is the Living Full Out Show, and
today we're talking about exceeding expectations and we are continuing
our conversation here at Derek Stafuriak. And honestly, one of
the things, Derek that I think is just so impressive
is how you kind of took that moment when you
(28:45):
know your foot was going numb. It was your arms
were going numb, your leg is going numb, you think
you're having a stroke. It all of a sudden goes away.
And there would have been actually a lot of people
that would have just said that was weird and went
on in their day, like I've got a lot to do,
because a lot of people put their health on the
(29:05):
back burner. But you didn't do that. You were insistent
of somebody's got to take me to the doctor. And
when they took you, what did they find out?
Speaker 15 (29:15):
Well, for that first appointment, they didn't find out. They
referred me to a neurologist. And then I went to
one neurologist. He thought it might be my grains. That
didn't like. I know, I'm not a medical doctor, but
it didn't feel like, man, I want to get a
second opinion. That doesn't make a lot of sense to
me in that And after a second opinion and some
(29:38):
more testing, I was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis.
Speaker 2 (29:43):
And that that is terrifying. I mean, I actually have
a really good friend who has it. It can be
so many different It's not the same for everybody, right,
the symptoms are similar bit different. Yeah, had you known
what that was? I mean, or did that just sound
like noise, Like what is that?
Speaker 15 (30:00):
Oh well, I didn't know. I had heard of it,
of course, but no one in my family or my
circle of friends or coworkers or anything has MS or
so I just knew it was one of those incurable
diseases that they abbreviate with letters. That's real bad. That's
all that was my feeling, like, oh man, I don't
know what this is, but I know it's not good,
(30:21):
you know.
Speaker 2 (30:21):
And and for those of us are an audience who
may not know what MS is, can you share with
us what it is? But also you know where the
lesions were on your body?
Speaker 15 (30:34):
Yeah, yeah, for sure. It's a it's an autoimmune disease
where my white blood cells are attacking my nervous system
and eating away kind of the insulation around the nerves,
which makes communication between your brain and the rest of
your parts more difficult. And that's why a lot of
the problems with MSS. People have trouble walking, have a
(30:56):
lot of trouble swallowing, vision, problems going to the through,
problems like a whole post of things that your nervous
system controls. And it's all these scars that occur in
your brain and in your spinal cord and in mind.
They noticed like a jelly bean sized scar right and
(31:16):
at the top of my spinal cord, and that was
making a communication to the left side of my body harder.
Speaker 22 (31:23):
And it's you know, wow, yeah.
Speaker 3 (31:27):
I mean that that is scary. Again.
Speaker 2 (31:29):
You've got your daughter to take care of, You've got
bills to pay, right, and what.
Speaker 3 (31:34):
Is this going to look like?
Speaker 2 (31:36):
And truly, at that time, you were still smoking, right,
you were kind of doing all your good and bad behaviors.
And what I find is so interesting, though, is you
decided to give up smoking. But it was because of
the words of your doctor. What did he say to you?
Speaker 15 (31:55):
Oh, he said, the fastest way to a wheelchair for
you it is to continue smoking. And this was powerful.
I mean yeah, that really scared me more than more
than anything, even more than the incident of half my numbness.
I thought, Man, I'm so much to do, and I
(32:19):
my daughter's eight years old, you know, and I just
that motivated me like nothing else. I quit smoking, started jogging,
And when I started jogging, I realized that I had
a limb. I never jogged, so I didn't know I
had this MS symptom of my left leg not really
working well until I tried to start jogging, and after
(32:41):
about five ten minutes of running, my leg would get
very weak and drag behind me, like like egor going
to get brains, you know, just this leg trying to
pull my leg behind me. And I remember thinking right away,
like this is that wheelchair calling you? Like it was
(33:03):
almost like if you could imagine a figurative wheelchair grabbing
my leg and holding me back, like come on, we're
sitting you down and I'm trying to run, like no way, dude,
We're going forward. Wow.
Speaker 2 (33:18):
You know, Derek, I can hear that emotion in your
voice because it really could have gone either way. It
really could have been a life sentence in that wheelchair
if you had not given up smoking, if you had
not tooken taken the initiative to run even when your
leg was dragging. And I think sometimes it's so easy
(33:40):
in life to.
Speaker 3 (33:41):
Just give up.
Speaker 2 (33:41):
It's so easy to settle, and you were not going
to do that.
Speaker 3 (33:45):
And again, you.
Speaker 2 (33:47):
Know the mysterious sides of life. Right, Having your daughter
in your life gave you that purpose. That boy in
sixth grade was hungry for winning hungry for purpose. The
comedian in you was hungry to inspire, to make a difference.
(34:07):
But sure enough, running actually led you down your path
of purpose in what way?
Speaker 15 (34:15):
Well, at first it was you know, running running to walk,
like your first swim lesson is just don't run, you know,
and then you can get on to whatever different kind
of things. But mine was I remember thinking like, all right,
my leg's weak. Okay, if you just run more and
your brain is firing neurons and signals down there thousands,
(34:39):
tens of thousands of times a day, it's got to
make that connection better. And there was no in my
head when I started living like that. There was no
way that I was thinking like, all right, I guess
the mess has me. I might as well sit back
and see what the pharmaceuticals can do. Because it's over.
I can't run. I never thought that, you know. I
(35:00):
just kept focused forward and we're going to do this.
Speaker 2 (35:05):
But I mean, today you've run how many marathons? I
mean seriously, you went from like limping to what.
Speaker 15 (35:12):
Yes, to you know what? Tomorrow I'm going to run
the Chicago Marathon and that is will be my forty
second twenty six point two mile run marathon.
Speaker 2 (35:26):
Yeah, I mean that's impressive seven years. One of my
very favorite movies is Forrest Gump, and I feel like
I'm talking to to Derek and Forrest at the same time.
Speaker 15 (35:39):
Really, I feel that way.
Speaker 7 (35:41):
Derek.
Speaker 15 (35:42):
Yeah, I even have images of like, you know, when
he's a little kid and he runs and the braces,
the braces are breaking off of his legs, you know,
a little longer for me. But uh uh, I really
felt it that way, like I had broken through in
just the joy of even being able to run.
Speaker 2 (36:03):
Now along the path here though, because you have, you know,
become healthier, and you've done so much and you know
you're running and you're just doing it despite still having
MS that hasn't gone away. It would be so easy
to stop injections, stop the medications. And you even contemplated that.
(36:25):
And I think a lot of people sometimes, you know,
give up on taking their pills. Oh no, I'm fine,
I'm over it.
Speaker 15 (36:31):
I'm good.
Speaker 3 (36:32):
Why have you not?
Speaker 17 (36:33):
Yeah?
Speaker 15 (36:35):
Uh, Because I don't know, That's the thing. I really
don't know. I wish sometimes I wish there was ten
different alternate universes and I could just run in this universe,
or I could just take my medicine in this universe,
or if I could just eat well in this one,
if I could, you know, and all these different things
to see what it is. But in the end it
(36:57):
you know, we can't do that. And since I don't know,
I'm going to do everything I can. Whatever I'm doing
right now, the combination of everything is working so well
that it's a little scary to try to not do that.
Speaker 2 (37:11):
I think it's smart. If it's what's the old saying,
if it's not broken, don't fix it.
Speaker 3 (37:16):
Yeah, right, And again, you're no stranger to crowds.
Speaker 2 (37:22):
Right there you were dancing doing your comedy, you know,
surrounded by beautiful women, right and you know again that
the cheering of you playing sports as a little guy.
Even though that you had that one moment, right you,
still we were doing it. Oh yeah, but you got
somebody reached out to you not too long ago who
(37:43):
heard about your MS story and that touched you.
Speaker 6 (37:47):
Why.
Speaker 15 (37:50):
Ah, you know, for most of the time where I was,
you know, doing my running and getting my health better,
it was all just just me, you know, And I
didn't even know if people were noticing. It wasn't even
a thing. It was just like, Hey, this is really
working for me and this is really great. And I
(38:10):
almost wish my doctor would ask me like, hey, you
need to tell people, you know, let's let's dive into
more of your health type of stuff. And I don't know,
it didn't really happen that way. This person that reached
out to me, I guess it really touched me deeply
because this lady had been diagnosed with MS just before
(38:34):
reaching out to me, Like she got home from her
doctor appointment with that diagnosis, she went on to Google
and she typed in the MS two like to to marathon,
and in her head was like, yeah, I wonder if
I could warn a marathon or MS as that affects that.
And she saw an article about me, reached out to
me and we started talking and I don't it just
(38:56):
touches my heart. She told me that she was really
depressed and then she read my story and had a
lot of hope and yeah, it's just powerful feeling.
Speaker 3 (39:13):
You know.
Speaker 2 (39:13):
It's it's interesting how in life it isn't about a
home run as a six year old sixth grade I mean,
and it isn't about you know, being on stage and
looking good and being the star, right it's more important
about knowing that you're impacting someone else's life. I mean,
(39:34):
wouldn't you say, that's the greatest applause you could have?
Speaker 15 (39:39):
You know, I used to think the best feeling was
making a crowd laugh, even just another person just joking around.
That bills me so full of dopamine or whatever chemical
it is. But I'd say having someone tell you that
inspire them and give them hope. That what was the
laughter thing out of the water. It's such a a
(40:02):
whole body is flooded with whatever these feel good things are.
That my eyes. I'm crying right now.
Speaker 2 (40:08):
Perfect I know you are, I know you are.
Speaker 22 (40:11):
You know what.
Speaker 2 (40:13):
MS picked on the wrong man. But in some ways
it was a great gift. Look at all the purpose
at birthed, and I am so proud of you, and
our entire community will google you, will look you up,
we'll cheer you on. And I so appreciate you sharing
your story with us today. Thank you so much, Thank you, Ansie, really,
(40:36):
thank you. Here's a tissue, okay, And for everybody we
are going to be coming right back and today it
is about exceeding expectations. Just when you think you know
what you're meant to do. Put on that seat belt,
because life will guide you just like a magnet. You
will be guided to what you're meant to do in life,
(40:56):
and then you're living full out.
Speaker 3 (40:59):
Stay with us.
Speaker 9 (41:06):
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Speaker 23 (42:01):
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That's why sunscreen and other safety measures are key to
protecting your skin from aging and cancer. The FDA recommends
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Speaker 6 (42:17):
On the label.
Speaker 23 (42:18):
That means both harmful ultraviolet A and B rays are block.
UVA rays age the skin. UVB rays burn and both
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use it wrong. Don't need sunscreen on a cloudy day? Wrong,
eighty percent of UV rays still get through the haze.
Only use sunscreen at the beach, Nope, anytime you're outside,
(42:41):
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Visit www dot FDA dot gov slash sunscreen for more information.
A message from the US Food and Drug admans.
Speaker 24 (43:01):
Right now, our country feels divided, but there's a place
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Speaker 15 (43:06):
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Me too, But I'm glad you are.
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Love has no labels and one small step are helping
people with different political views, beliefs, and life experiences come
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Speaker 15 (43:21):
Wow, your story is so interesting.
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When people actually sit down, talk and listen to one another,
they can break down boundaries and connect as human beings.
At Love Hasno Labels dot com slash one small Step,
you can listen to amazing, life changing conversations and find
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I know one thing.
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This conversation gives me hope.
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It gives me a lot of hope to take a
step toward bringing our country and your community together by
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Speaker 6 (44:02):
All right, grew, Let's get her dug.
Speaker 7 (44:07):
Honey, you want to give me a hand.
Speaker 6 (44:08):
I'm planning that tree you remember.
Speaker 22 (44:10):
No matter how large or small your digging project may be,
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(44:54):
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Speaker 2 (45:02):
When it comes to exceeding expectations, you want to go
after life with vigor, with heart, and you want to
know that although things may not always land and turn
out exactly like you expected, what's riddled in there is
the unexpected and sometimes those are the biggest treasures of
all because maybe, just maybe you're meant to be and
(45:24):
do something that isn't top of mind, something that you
haven't planned, and your greatest rewards are right ahead of
you as you live full out.
Speaker 1 (45:37):
You're listening to Living Full Out with Nancy Solary. As
a professional motivational speaker. Nancy can assist you to blow
through your setbacks and start living full out. If you
have an inspirational story you want to share, email us
at connect at livingfullout dot com. Once again, here's Nancy.
Speaker 2 (45:57):
It is so nice to be here with all of
you today, Nancy Silary, and this is the Living Full
Out Show, and today we're talking about exceeding expectations and
I'll tell you what it's really humbling actually to be
sometimes me because in my world obviously I'm here with
you doing this show. And it's sometimes interesting because behind
(46:20):
the scenes, I have to do a lot of prep work.
I will research my guests, I'll watch videos of them,
I'll sometimes talk to them ahead of time, but I've
got to have their story in my brain from A
to Z because I can't look at note cards being
legally blind, and quite frankly, I always want to make
sure that every interview is truly a conversation, just the
(46:44):
two of us hanging out talking out their life's journey.
But it does take with prep and even when I'm
out and about and some of you may or may
not know, I actually host two TV shows. One is
nonprofit MVP. You can go to nonprofit at MVP dot
com to learn more about that, or the Living Full
Out TV show, and that is The Livingfulloutshow dot com.
(47:08):
And what's kind of fascinating about doing the TV shows
is you know, around me there's multiple cameras, there's a
production team, there's hair and makeup and all these things
that man, I wish I could see it, but I can't.
And it's always kind of interesting, especially when I'm in
hair makeup and somebody's like, oh wow, that looks great,
(47:30):
or I love the eyes, and I'm thinking, man, I
wish I could see it. But life isn't about seeing
literally scene. It's about soaking up the moment. It's what
you hear, it's what you taste, it's what you smell,
it's what you touch. All of those build the moments.
So even though I can't see the cameras, the crew,
(47:53):
the makeup, I can hear the laughter. I can hear
people saying, oh my gosh, I'm so excited or that
was so fun, or I want to do it again.
Speaker 3 (48:03):
You know, I can.
Speaker 2 (48:04):
I can hold the camera, I can, you know, touch
the mic. And that experience, believe it or not, is
just as grand as if I could see it. But
there is this little thing called expectations, right that we
have for ourselves and sometimes what others have for us.
And I know that when I pop down in that chair,
(48:26):
and sometimes oftentimes when we're doing shows, I mean I
might sit down and interview five people in a row,
and that's you know, anywhere between five to six hours
in a chair interviewing, and I'm present with the person.
I'm interviewing again, I'm hearing, I'm tasting, I'm smelling everything
around me. But then I get done with the day
(48:47):
and I turn around to you know who, my staff,
and I'll be like, gosh, what how'd it go? Which
show is your favorite? And how did I do? And
you know, could have done anything differently because I always
want to cut up my game and be the best
I can be, right, and you know, I get different
answers and different words of advice and tips. And then
(49:08):
it isn't until after editing that I get emailed the episodes,
and that is a moment that is I'm kind of
on the edge of my seat. I'm kind of nervous
because I have these expectations for what I hope it
came out to be. How I sounded, how I did,
did the guests have an emotional moment? Did we laugh
or would we have a good time? And if I
(49:30):
was the audience, if I was you, would I even
enjoy it? And sometimes we have to be on that
edge of our seat. We have to sometimes go back
and rather than holding on to the expectations of the moment,
actually going back after and rewatching ourselves listening. It's really humbling,
(49:51):
I'll tell you. But I sit there and I and
I'm almost smiling inside because I think of ten year
old Nancy who had this dream watching Oprah doing her
talk show, thinking, boy, wouldn't that be great? Would that
be a great career. I wonder how she got that gig.
Now I'm just a ten year old, you know, enjoying
(50:12):
my ice cream, thinking I want to do that when
I'm older, you know. And so it is interesting sometimes
when I'm watching the episodes back after they've been edited
and ready for airing, and I smiled because I think, wow,
I have exceeded my expectations. I can't see it. I'm
just listening to it, smelling it, tasting it, touching it,
(50:35):
but it is. It's the wildest dreams that that ten
year old could have ever imagined. And I want you
to think about where in your life are you living
your wildest dreams. Is there something that you always wanted
to do growing up? Is there a hobby that you
once had that life got busy and you kind of
let that go. I really encourage you today to be
(50:59):
the day that you pick that hobby back up, that
you say to yourself, well, gosh, it's never too late
to be, It's never too late to try. And then
even when you do those hobbies, you take those actions
in life rather than just letting them roll by. I
promise you, I want you to have someone record it,
(51:21):
tape it, I want someone to write about it, and
then I want you to go back and relive it.
And I guarantee you you are going to be so
proud and you're going to exceed your own expectations. Now
make sure that beyond today's show that you go to
the Living Full Out Show app. It's in the app store,
because we want to make sure that you are motivated
(51:42):
at the gym, in the car, on a road trip. Also,
we want to hear from you. If you have an
inspirational story and would like to be a guest on
the show, reach out to us at connect at livingfollout
dot com. Let us know what you went through, how
you got through it, most of all, what you learned,
and of course your contact information, and we'd love to
(52:02):
get in touch with you and perhaps have you as
an inspirational guest on the show. Please know that I
believe in you so much. I know every day gets
a little bit twisting in its own way.
Speaker 3 (52:13):
But you can do this.
Speaker 2 (52:15):
You can live full out.
Speaker 1 (52:27):
Thank you for listening to the Living full Out Show
with Nancy Silari. To learn more about this program, visit
livingfullout dot com for the latest episodes. Connect with the
Living full Out community by following us on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram,
and subscribing to our YouTube channel. Here's to you, Living
full Out.
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