Ep. 3 - Strengthening Faith & Quieting The Critics | Amy Hafner

In this episode of “The Bounce Back,” Andrea Vecchio talks to Amy Hafner about her discovery of self and faith after years in the public eye through her marriage to Major League Baseball player Travis Hafner. She recounts the moment she read an article titled “MLB’s Most Tradable Wives” on which her name was listed, and what she learned about self-worth and not allowing other people’s opinions to define her. Amy talks about life lessons from her husband, her initial resistance to religious faith, and how to embrace acceptance of self.

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
This is FCB Radio. We're realClock Lives. Visit us online at FCB
radio dot com. We mission wehold Back the I'm Andrea Echio. You're

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listening to the bounce Back the podcast. If we can change one person's life
for the better by sharing our story, then it's a story worth telling.
Life is a mixed bag and there'sso much of the good stuff all around
us, but it's the failure,pain and setbacks that can make us feel
stuck. The teachable moments come fromhow we bounce back from our struggles.

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You're about to listen to an incrediblestory and lessons learned from the bounce Back.
I'm very excited to talk to myguest today on the bounce Back Podcast
because we've known each other through quitea few decades of life, and somehow
all of our conversations led us tosolving all of the problems in the world.
You know how those talks go aboutlove, life and all its mysteries.

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Her own bio describes her as lovingGod first, a boy mom,
an MLB wife, and a womanwho took her love for all things organic
and turned that into a profitable skincarebusiness. My friend Amy Hafner. Thank
you for sharing the microphone with methe day. Literally, this is so
fun. We're on a smaller microphonetoday. Sometimes there are technical issues,

(01:42):
but I hope everybody can hear yourmessage loud and clear because you have such
a great one. There are alot of things to talk about, Amy,
but let's I want to start herebecause it says it in your bio.
Let's talk about the MLB wife thing. First, your husband, Travis
Haffner, who spent many years withthe Cleveland Indians and also with a couple

(02:04):
other teams. I think he waswith the Rangers and then with the Yankees.
Um, what has your relationship likebeen like with the term m LB
wife. Well, you know,it's it's so funny because it's such a
funny term. And you know,do I you know, you call yourself
this, but you don't really feellike I'm My friends call me. They're

(02:25):
like you're Amy from the block.You know. Right now, I have
my my hat on, I wearsweatpants. So it's it's really interesting.
Um, but it's it's been afun, fun experience. Like you know,
no one's ever gonna feel bad foran MLB wife by any means.
It's really it's you get to experienceso many different things and travel and see

(02:46):
so many different things, and I'vehad such a great experience. I think
my experience, as you know,my husband playing baseball was so different from
so many because you know, I'mfrom Cleland. He spent ten years in
Cleveland. I got to be inmy hometown and I didn't really have to
do a lot of the traveling ortrades or you know, anything like that.

(03:09):
So I got to actually be likewhere my friends were and where my
family was, and so it wasa great, great experience. Obviously,
with anything, there's pros and cons. But you know, so when you
when your husband struggles with injury,I mean, that's no fun by any
means, or you know, notknowing towards the end of his career obviously

(03:29):
he was a free agent one year. Not knowing where you're going and trying
to plan and having kids, that'sthat's always interesting and fun to do.
But because like when your life isin the public eye, yeah, then
you have people who want to pryinto that or give you their opinion or
ask a lot of questions that normallywould be like private family business. But

(03:53):
when you're on a public platform,they're sort of this and I know this
just even from my years of doingtelevision. There's just this something I think
in the public's eye, they justbe like, well, they know you,
and they know a little bit ofyour business, so they ask a
little bit more about your business thatmaybe they wouldn't normally ask if you weren't

(04:14):
in the public eye. Right,Yeah, there was definitely. I think
the hardest thing was always, youknow, with media, with anything like
that, there was always things thatweren't true or things that maybe were hurtful
or where you could take them,you know, one way or the other.
But I remember one article being writtensaying when Travis was hurt and she's

(04:38):
like and there was a grandma ora lady who chimed it and basically said
his wife must not be a goodcook or must not be feeding them.
And I had to laugh and Iwas like, well, that's kind of
true, so maybe she's got apoint, but very yeah, I don't
know how he connect the dots withthat well for her, but I thought
it had it was a very validpo well. I think like, especially

(05:00):
in Cleveland, with your last name, that becomes familiar and it's unique.
There aren't. I don't know ifthere are any other half nurse in the
Cleveland area. In North Dakota.You have to go to North Dakota,
Okay, So it can carry someweight, right, And like you said,
there are perks from the like gettinginto restaurants or getting a little extra

(05:20):
special attention, or getting good concerttickets. But at the same time,
I know you and it's not justa last name or your spouse's job that
you want to be defined by.So did that start to at some point
play a role for you of wantingto make sure that you were your own

(05:42):
person, separate from the baseball worldand separate from your husband's job, because
it wasn't your job, right,and it was it was odd being just
oh, that's Travis's wife, Likethat's how I was known as Travis's wife.
You know what what do I do? I'm just Travis's wife. And
you get you can get caught up, and you can get you can feel

(06:03):
like what is my purpose? Likewhat am I really doing? Am I
just a wife? Now? Awife is a really important job and I
don't want to discredit being a wifeby any means. Getting to serve my
family and serve. My husband is, you know, my number one always,
so I don't think. And Ihad to kind of make that realization

(06:25):
because at first, you know,I went to college, I had a
job, and then the next thing, I know, we get married and
I go down a part time andthen, you know, leave my job
so I can I don't want tosay, follow him around, but be
there for him when he needs it. And it was hard for me because
I had always like I got myfirst job when I was thirteen, and
I was like, I have towork. I have to do this.
I have to you know, Idon't want to be worthless, Like I

(06:46):
felt worthless if I didn't make moneyor have an income, and I thought
that that But then you know,going through this this growth or this transition
that I've made. Now on theother side, I think that that was
maybe one of the best things beinga wife, being a mom, being

(07:06):
you know, part of this familyis there's nothing more fulfilling to me in
some ways. Now, does thatmean that I don't have another outlet?
Does that mean that that is mysoul title? No, I'm not.
I'm not defined by that title byany means, but that is a super
important thing but yes, I havebranched out a little bit here and there.

(07:27):
So yeah, and I want toat some point get into that part
of it. You part of yourbranching out was that you and I know
you don't really necessarily like the Spotlight. Like you and I had a talk
show and you would come on everyFriday, we would do a segment because
you were really involved with the Clevelandapl and so you would do a segment

(07:48):
every week to try to find adog a home. But initially you were
like, I don't know how Ifeel about having a microphone put on me
and having a camera like in myface. That just wasn't really initially your
jam. So now in your lifewhere I've seen you take the stage right,
you are starting to travel and speakand spread positive messaging, especially because

(08:13):
your faith became stronger, which we'llget into that too. But I want
to back track because before you wellbefore you started doing that, I think
you know, you were a youngperson with a life in the spotlight and
people writing about you or giving opinionsabout you, and so you had this

(08:37):
moment, a big moment when youwere a younger woman, and you now
have spoken about it on stage Isaw your talk about this specific topic,
and I'm hoping that you'll talk aboutit because I think there were there are
a lot of strong messages in therefor women, and certainly on the self
worth issue. And that was youwere reading an article about MLB's Hottest Wives,

(09:05):
I believe, And then I'm goingto turn it over to you to
talk about what happened when you werereading that article, because this is a
talk that you sometimes give on stage. It's a it's a really important one.
I love sharing this. It's sofunny that I say now that I
love sharing it because it was probablyone of the darkest, saddest moments,
and it's so I feel bad evensaying that it was such a dark moment

(09:28):
of my life, because if Ilook at it, you know, it
shouldn't have been. So there wasan article. I was surfing the internet,
like you said, one night andone of one of the girls had
sent me the article because a girlon our team had been voted like top
twenty five, like hottest Wives,and we were, you know, it's
kind of fun, you know,we were joking around about it, and

(09:48):
you know, obviously she was beautifulgirl. But on the side, it
said there were like related articles,and one of the articles said top twenty
five most tradable wives, and Iwas like, well, what's that?
And I clicked on it and itprefaced an article it would show a picture
of a beautiful wife, like ayou know, a playmate or a maxim
model or a supermodel, and thenit would show a picture of just like

(10:11):
a wife that wasn't worthy, wasn'tpretty, or this is what the article
deemed they you know, wouldn't weren'tgood enough for their husband, their husband
should trade them in for a bettermodel, you know, basically. And
I was like, who would writethis article? I was so angry about
it. And I was like,you know, scrolling through it, and
I saw a girlfriend of mine onthere, and my girlfriend was gorgeous.

(10:33):
I'm like, how is she onthere? This is the dumbest article I've
ever read. And I got tonumber thirteen and there I was, and
it was a picture of me andI with Travis, and I just remember
being like everything that I had,where I felt like my worth was to

(10:56):
be his wife, was stripped ofme. And I remember reading the common
months below, and I'm sure youcould imagine what they said, but they
weren't kind by any means. Theyyou know, said really horrible things.
And I just remember in that momentcrying. And it was like two in
the morning because we stayed up reallylike you know, in baseball, and
I literally got out of my bed, went into my closet and like curled

(11:18):
up in a ball and just startcried. I like cried for four hours,
and I didn't leave the house forfour days. I was. I
even said to Travis, and I'mso embarrassed that I said this, but
I said, you know, ifyou want to divorce me, I would
totally understand why because I felt likeso unworthy for him. And it's really

(11:39):
interesting and I guess we can getinto this later, like where that has
taken me in such a horrible,evil moment where I felt absolutely like useless
based on stranger's opinions, right becauseyou went down that rabbit hole, yep,
which is so toxic to go down. Right. It's like with every

(12:00):
comment you read and it's digging atyou, they're taking stabs at you,
like the thing that makes part ofwhat makes you who you are. You
can't, we can't and you're beautiful, by the way, but we can't
change the way. Well, Iguess sometimes you can. People conte like
they look like a totally different person. That's not you, though, right
and so, but with every nastycomment, like it's this weird thing,

(12:24):
like you think people would say,just shut it off and don't read it,
but when you start reading it,you can't stop it. It's almost
like it's a very unhealthy addiction inthat moment. Right, So, how
much up into that moment had youever struggled with self worth? So when

(12:45):
I was a little girl, Iwas a total tomboy. And my probably
awkward stage lasted longer than like mostpeople, probably from about third grade to
my senior year in high school.You know, I cut my own bangs.
You know it was I was lookingat old pictures of myself. I'm
like, oh my goodness, likewhat happened I had those pictures so like

(13:07):
my seventh grade picture, like,oh my gosh, we all have those,
girl. But you know, Iwas. I loved to like I
love to have fun like with myfriends, like I love to play kickball,
and I was. I was atomboy. Um and then so I
always did struggle with that. Iwould say, I remember being a little
girl and my mom had just likecut my hair super short, and somebody

(13:28):
asked me, like, are youa boy or a girl? And I
was like, you know, that'slike the worst thing that you could say
to like an eight year old girl. Um. And then you know,
going to college, you know,I won't say that it was you know,
I just became beautiful or something.I think it was a combination of
alcohol and hormones. But you know, I learned how to like do my

(13:48):
hair, and I, you knowwhatever, I took a little bit better.
I dressed a little bit different andwhat are those college outfits? By
the way, And on a totalside note, I look back, I'm
like I was was it ivies andlike cut off? Yes, I wear
I don't know. We was likewe were like it was not good fashion,
but we sort of were cute.Then it definitely wasn't sexy noah,

(14:11):
which I suppose is probably good.We didn't really need to be sexy when
we were eighteen years old, asI do it. But yeah, so
but then, you know, fromwhere I was to then in college,
I felt I thought I became cuteand that's where I really based my foundation
was like, Okay, now I'mcute, so now I'm worthy of whatever,

(14:33):
and and I was so messed up, but you know it felt good
at the time. You're like,yeah, hey, I'm cute. Now
I can get a date. Butyeah, and getting attention, right,
it was about getting a different kindof attention, not the little girl who
was like are you a girl ora boy? Suddenly then it was attention
from boys who were like, youlook hot, right, and so then

(14:54):
it becomes this sort of warped versionof what self worth is about, right,
m So you then we backtrack.You're in the closet, you're crying.
You have somebody who puts you onthis awful list, which is terrible
that those things are even written,but that is life today because there are

(15:15):
people who are that way and theywrite that stuff. And you say to
your husband, you can divorce meif you want, which I'm sure he
was probably like, what what areyou saying? And Travis is so great,
I mean, he was just like, that's the stupidest article. First
of all, why are you readingthat? Second of all, it's not
true. So he's just and youknow, obviously he's a baseball player.

(15:37):
I'm sure he's had a million.You know, he's had any article written
about him from like that he wason steroids too, that he's you know,
washed up to whatever it could be, and so he's he's kind of
dealt with that. And not tosay that you know, even he enjoys
it or it's great or anything likethat, but he just stays away from
it. So I shouldn't have beenreading it in the first place, because

(16:00):
that stuff is just out there.But you know, I'm really glad that
I did. What then, doesTravis teach you when those difficult moments happen,
or when there are people from theoutside who have negative things to say,
Like if he's able to stay prettygrounded and focused and not have that

(16:22):
affect him as much, what haveyou learned from him? Yeah, you
know, just he is so humble. He is the most humble person that
I've ever met. And it justreally how to carry yourself. I mean,
he is you know, he isobviously a great baseball player, but

(16:45):
he is the most amazing husband andhe really is my best friend. And
just watching him go through the motionsand just stay in the same and not
to say like when he was hurtthat it didn't he wasn't having a hard
time with that, Like he wasn'tlike it's sunshine and roses. But he
always treated his family the same.And you know, and he really he's

(17:07):
just mentally strong. He really is. He's just a tough person and he's
a hard worker and he focuses onwhat he can control. And I don't
know, I've he's taught me somuch. I can't say enough good things
about my husband. But he justhe really is. He's just got it,
like he's just got it together inthat way. Not that he's perfect

(17:30):
and he would tell you like,oh, I'm definitely not perfect, but
he he understands what his job is. He's he does his job because he
loves to do his job, notfor any other attention or anything like that.
Yeah, I can't remember what yearit was, but I remember the
location. So this was a numberof years ago. You and I were

(17:52):
sitting at a restaurant called Strip Steakhousein Avon, Ohio. We were at
a high hop table and we weredrinking a bottle of red wine, probably
a cab and I'm sure it wassomething really awesome. And you said to
me, so, Andrea, Ifound God. And you were right,

(18:17):
and you said, I know,I know, I grew up Jewish.
I'm the Jewish girl who found Godand Jesus. And I think like when
we find something profound in our life, it's usually at a time when we've
been depleted or we're struggling with something. Because that's a big statement to make.

(18:40):
Can you kind of talk about whatwas going on and happening in your
life up until this point when youhad this like profound discovery in your life.
Yeah, so it was I foundGod, I could say the last
year of Travis's career, and youknow, maybe it was that that kind
of pushed me that way. Iwill say. In two thousand and nine,

(19:07):
C. C. Sabathia got traded. Mike brought Michael Brantley and Matt
Laporta to Cleveland, and Matt Laporta'swife, Dara, became one of my
really good friends. I worked outwith her, we traveled together, and
she's what they call uh I thinkit's a PK, a pastor's kid,
and I I just remember having conversationswith her and they were just different.

(19:30):
They were deep, they were youknow, I don't know, and she
had I don't want to say shehad it all together, because you know,
she still had emotions and feelings andall that kind of stuff, but
there was just a piece in herthat I could not put my finger on.
And then her mom would come in, and you know, sometimes they
would come over, you know,if we were on the road, we
would kind of be together, andshe I can't really explain it. There

(19:55):
was just something different about them.And for four years she invited me to
Bible study and she knew I wasJewish. I'm like, um, I'm
a Jewish girl, Like what areyou doing inviting me in Bible studies?
I don't want to go to Biblestudy? Right? But she was so
kind and she would always say like, Amy, I know this may not
be your thing, but I wantyou to feel invited and no pressure.
And really, you know I jokethat I say, like why is she

(20:17):
invited me to Bible studies? ButI always felt like when she would say
that, like that was so nice, like wow, like thanks for including
me, Like you know, Iprobably will say no, but it's just
nice that you even thought of invitingme and gave me the opportunity to say
no. And she did that forfour years. Now, Like I would
have given up on myself after youknow, like two invites. I don't

(20:38):
know, yeah, but she thenwhen Travis went to their spring training was
in Tampa, when we were inTampa, that's where they're from, That's
where their their churches. It's calledGrace Family Church, and she called me.
Her mom called me because Dara wasactually in Arizona with Matt for spring
training for the Indians and invited meto come. And I don't know what

(21:03):
happened, but I just was likeyeah, and I think I even said
it, and I was like whatI just said, yes, Like now
I'm committed. Now I gotta go. No, but I really did.
And this family had been so goodto me. I knew that this was
important to them and I wanted togo and support them. So I asked
Travis to go, and we wentup. So you were going to be
nice, not because there was somethingelse happening where you're like, I think

(21:27):
this might be good for my soulright now. Now. Yeah, it
was kind of nice. I wasgoing to be nice. And we walked
in and you know, there's Iknow, there's one church that we go
to in Cleveland as Grace Church inMiddleburg, which we absolutely love Pastor Jonathan
and then Journey Church. There's actuallya lot of great churches in the Cleveland

(21:48):
area, but I had never beento a non denominational Christian church. You
know, it was either you wereJewish or you were Catholic. That was
kind of it. And I rememberwalking in and you kind of warned me,
like, you know, it's goingto be very different from you know,
your synagogue experience. And there's likesmoke machines and lights, and you
know, like there's this rock bandand it's the best music, like like

(22:12):
they can sing, like like there'sthe Atrito that there's like there's like you're
Canter who like crack his boys cracksand he's singing and Hebrew. I mean
it's like, wow, this isamazing. But I do remember walking in
and I definitely my heart was guardedand I was just like, Okay,
is this a cult? This isa cult? I am walking into a

(22:32):
cult. What is happening here?This is not how we talk about God
or celebrate God. Like this islike a big show. And there was
a song um that played. Itwas Carrie Joe and she's a big Christian
singer, but it was called Ohthe blood of oh the blood which it
talks about the gift of Jesus's blood, and I thought it was so weird.

(22:52):
I was like so grossed out andthere was like red graphics on the
screen and I remember listening to itand just kind of like brushing it off,
and I just I would take thename Jesus out of everything. I
was like, Okay, it's justGod, because I believe in God,
like I can believe in God.And the message was actually on tithing,
which is it's a money message.So they were talking about money and um

(23:15):
Debbie, which is Dara's mom.You know, it was like, you
know, we only talk about thisonce a year and kind of like trying
to you know, she didn't wantme to have like a bad taste in
my mouth from church, like oh, they're only after money kind of thing.
But I joke that if you wantto get a Jewish girl to understand
Jesus, you've got to talk aboutmoney because it makes so much sense.
I'll let you say that, likewe like save me, like galancing our

(23:38):
check, like the stocks. Youknow, I'm so stereotypical in that way,
but it was it was, youknow, they take verses from the
Bible, I mean, and theseare verses that you know, there's a
lot of verses improverbs, which isKing Solomon, you know, who was
King David's son if you know thehistory, but he was like the richest
king. He built God temple.I just remember the story about too and

(24:03):
my kid bible, the two womenwho came to King Solomon and they had
a baby, and each one ofthem claimed it was the baby and he
said, I don't, I'll doI'll cut the baby in half. And
then the woman who was like,no, please don't was the real mother.
That's what I remember from my kids, my little kid Bible. Yeah,
well, King Solomon prayed for wisdom, like he didn't rich as he
wanted wisdom, and God was likeso impressed by that that he gave him

(24:26):
not only wisdom but like a tonof money. But anyways, he wrote
proverbs, which is a cool,really unbelievable. A lot of quotes are
based like if you look on quotes, it's really a proverb, but you
don't really even know that it's aproverb. But I totally lost my train
of thought. But basically there wereproverbs talking about money and they just made

(24:48):
so much sense. And I waslike, wow, that's really wise.
Oh that's really good. And Travisand I drove home. We came back
and well, we drove home andI asked him, Hey, do you
want to go back next Saturday?We're going to say night church because we're
really wild. You want to goback next Saturday? Oh my my,
how times changed right right from clubsin downtown Cleveland to church on a Saturday

(25:10):
night. And we went back andthat same song, that Oh the Blood
song came up, and I rememberthere's one line that said, oh what
love? No greater love, grace? How can it be that in my
sin? Yes, even then hegave his life for me. And I
don't know what happened in that moment. You know, I'm not all like

(25:34):
fu foo spirit e by any means, but something happened in that moment,
and I and I didn't. Iwasn't. I mean, I cried when
that article was written, but Iwas a tough girl, Like I wasn't
a big cry baby type person.I mean, you could probably assesst to
that, but I lost it,like just started sobbing. I was in
my head. I was like getit together, Amy, Like why are

(25:56):
you crying why are you? Likethis is a stupid song, Like what
is going on? And at theend they always ask would anybody like to
give their life to Christ? Andyou know, you pray this prayer and
kind of thing, and you're supposedto everybody's eyes are supposed to be closed
and you can raise your hand ifyou want to give your life to Christ.
And this is a huge church.I mean, there's got to be

(26:18):
a couple thousand people in there rightthen. And I remember just kind of
like one eye open because I didn'twant what. I was like, what
if there's a Jewish person in herewho sees me? You know, like
I felt so horrible kind of doingit. What do they think they're going
to be, like traitor? Idon't know. I just I remember that
being really hard for me, andI just kind of like under the seat,

(26:42):
kind of like stuck my hand outso nobody could see it. And
I remember praying in my head thinkingI said this. I said, all
right, Jesus, I'll give youone chance. And I was like,
don't say that to Jesus because he'lltake that one chance and he'll just do
something crazy. And he put somany people in our path that year that,

(27:03):
as we say, minister to me, like just told me the truth
and just spoke life into every situation. That it just transformed my life now
looking back now, it was theperfect year because end of baseball. Leaving
baseball is always an interesting transition,and a lot of people really struggle with
it because it is a huge partof your life, and a lot of

(27:25):
people can become defined by whether it'sbaseball or television or running a law firm,
I don't know, whatever it is. When you have a big career,
especially on a big platform, Yeah, you become defined by it,
right, and you're so used tothat lifestyle and that it's just it's a
big change, and I was nervousabout it, to tell you the truth,

(27:49):
but finding God that last year.Not to say that I there's never
a day where I'm like, oh, I baseball was so fun or you
know, I don't miss it atall, but it really brought a whole
new purpose, in a whole newfoundation in my life and that I didn't

(28:10):
have before. Would you say thatyou were spiritually depleted before this, I
don't know. We'll call it maybeon a weight beginning in your life,
right, So I would say Iwas very anti religious, like I was
Jewish, but I was Jewish becauseit was my fame, like my family.
I hated going to temple. Ihated like I didn't really I'm anti

(28:33):
establishment, like I hate rules.I'm not a rule follower. I don't
like rules. But yeah, thatand for me, that would spiritually deplete
me, you know, like,oh, if you do this, you're
you know, going to Hell oryou know, whatever it is. And
I what I really liked about thistype of atmosphere. It was more about

(28:53):
having a relationship with God than reallyand letting God do the work through you,
not because somebody told you to doit, but because like that's what
you feel, you know, that'swhat you've come to your own conclusion on.
But having this relationship with God,and it sounds so funny. It's
like, will do you sit downand talk to God? Well kind of
yes, I mean that's the bestway I can explain it. So yeah,

(29:17):
I guess I would say I wasspiritually depleted in some ways at zero,
you know, spirituality. I wouldsay, I've known you for a
long time, so we were friends. You're younger than me, but we
were friends when we were in ourtwenties still and I said in this intro,
and it was true, like youand I would often find ourselves,

(29:37):
whether it was at the end ofthe night after our party or we went
to dinner, but we somehow siton the floor or maybe a comfortable chair.
And I said, you know,we solved all the problems of the
world, meaning we just would havereally deep, thoughtful conversations. So I
think you're a person who's always haddepth and texture and substance to your life.

(29:59):
I'm you know, then when yourfaith and religion became strong and you
look back at the growth that's happenedto you, how has it changed enhanced?
What have you in your life?Like how do you feel different today
when you reflect back on where youcame from? Yeah, And I would

(30:21):
just say my foundation is different.So like my foundation is now not on
world like the world, you know, not on the way that I look,
or money or this and that,And my foundation is really on like
who Jesus says I am? Andwhat I know? You know, we're
here for such a short time.You know, our time on earth is

(30:45):
so short, and you know thedeath rate is one hundred percent, Like
we're all going to die, andI think that was a huge fear of
mine as well. The year beforethat happened, Travis's dad passed away from
prostate cancer. I lost my momand I just remember in that moment,
I actually did go and talk tothe priest and the rabbi and said,
okay, so now what happens?And you know, just really, you

(31:07):
know, those deep type of conversationslike really, what does happen? And
we don't think about eternity? Youknow, we think about right now,
and but what is that going tolook like? Because you are going to
have to face that someday And youknow, where do I want to put
my faith and where do I wantto put my trust? But you know
when Jesus is kind of my foundation. He's my cornerstone, is what they

(31:30):
say in the Bible. I mean, I not to say that I'm perfect,
because I definitely am not. Istill have some It's so funny because
I still struggle with some of thesame stuff that I did like ten years
ago, and I'm like, gosh, we're still here, Like why am
I still struggling with this? Youknow? And I suffered with really bad
anxiety for a couple of years andjust fear. And that was actually after
I became a Christian, but justknowing I believe that the Bible is the

(31:56):
truth, and like it doesn't change. I believe that that's the truth.
And if I stand on that promise, I don't believe that God can lie.
Then I know it's taken care of, and so it just changes my
outlook on everything. I think it'sinteresting too when you talk about having lost
your parents in your lives and wego, Okay, we know death is

(32:17):
a sure thing, and so thenthere's this fear, right because there becomes
this like, well, we cansometimes fear what we've never seen. We
know what we were raised to believe, right, we know we were raised
to believe there's heaven, but Ithink it's human nature to go but is
there really? Like okay, soif we died, like, is it

(32:37):
really just all over? And Iguess we wouldn't know because it would just
be dead and it would be allover. But there's this like hope that
there's something else. So you believein heaven? Yes? And did you
always were you always certain or doyou think in strengthening your faith you became

(33:01):
more certain, like you actually believedit because it's one thing to say I
believe there's a heaven. It's anotherthing to like, really truly with your
whole heart and soul belief. AndI will say, like, even being
a Christian, you still have momentsof doubt. But doubt they say,
you know, there's belief and thenthere's unbelief, and doubt is kind of

(33:22):
it actually feel like translated, itmeans like the bridge. So it's okay
to doubt, It's okay to havequestions, it's okay to seek. I
mean, I think that's where Godwants us to be, Like, Okay,
I have a little bit of doubt, let me dig into it and
let God work. You know.It's it's cool how many miracles that I
have been able to witness in thepast, you know, five years I've

(33:45):
been a Christian now five years.You know how many miracles, like things
that I can't explain that really havestrengthened my face faith other people's testimonies,
like the stories that I have heard, like the stories that you know obviously
you're you're podcasting about. I meanthose stories that can't there's just we can't
explain it. There's so many thingson this earth that you know, I

(34:07):
know that we have science, andI know that we have all of that
kind of stuff, but there's somany things that we can't explain, like
how can we explain love? Howcan we explain like and that's really you
know, Christians, I know thatthey get a bad rap. Religion in
general gets a bad rap because peopleare still sinners and we're still not perfect.

(34:28):
But if you really look at theroot of Christianity, it's all about
loving other people and not being focusedon yourself, about serving other people.
And you know, sometimes it's likeyou know, you see, it's like
people get to give these opinions likeoh, we're not going to watch this
show because it's you know, X, Y and Z, or we're not
going to do this. And I'mnot saying that you know, they should

(34:50):
or shouldn't. But at the rootof it, what the one commandment when
Jesus comes back. You know,there's all these commandments. There's actually like
seven hundred laws and the Jewish religionlike that they wrote like you know,
you have to bathe a certain day. There's like crazy laws that you have
to follow. But Jesus came backand said like basically the whole, all
the laws can be summed up,and to love your neighbor as yourself.

(35:14):
And don't you think that's kind ofa basis really of any religion too,
is to love other people, totreat other people with love and respect.
I mean I don't, I can't, you know, talk about other religions,
but I definitely know that that's whatChristianity is about. So yeah,
Well, do you think that youa person can have strong faith without signs?

(35:42):
I feel like sometimes like as humans, we always give me a sign,
show me a sign, then Iknow I'm on the right path.
Do you think you can still havefaith without being given a sign? Yes?
Yeah, and um, I definitelyjust I mean if you walk outside,
or you see a sunset, oryou just you look out. How
the human body is made? Imean I don't know, like really what

(36:07):
how you couldn't believe in something likeoh, yes, the atmosphere just like
gave us a heart that pump.I don't know anatomy very well. I
can't correct this part. I didnot do well in my science classes.
Helped me science and math and bodywork, but like like a balance to
check checkbook, just like you.But that's about it right, like just
the integrated things like just that hadto be planned by a genius, you

(36:31):
know, like, oh my goodness, I think you know, I mean,
and this could be a whole otherdebate we want to get into because
somebody would you know me, getinto science and say, you know,
they need the proof of it.There are I met an atheist the other
day and I always thought, ohman, that would it was an interesting
conversation. I think sometimes when itcomes to faith and religion and beliefs,

(36:52):
we have to be open to havingconversations with each other without passing judgment and
without force seeing our ideas on eachother, but to come from a place
of respect. That's what I thinkis the most interesting thing about talking to
people who have different beliefs and outlooks. Right is too sometimes first just listen

(37:14):
and then communicate our thoughts without judgment, right, And I think you're right.
Listening is the most important thing becauseI sometimes I'll talk my I don't
know if you ever do this.You talk yourself into something, you talk
yourself out of something. In Christianity, there's like a ministry called apologetics,
and the most famous I think apologeticis ken Ham. He's actually in the

(37:35):
Cincinnati area and he's like a biochemist and he built there's a museum and
it's lex Sington, but it's theArc. He recreated the Arc and you
can go there. And he onYouTube he actually debates Bill ny And you
know, Bill Nye is extremely smartand no science guy. He's the science
guy. I mean, who didn'tgrow up watching Bill Night. But it's

(37:57):
so interesting and you know, I'mnot the person to debate that. I
mean, my faith really just comesfrom my heart. I'm not that smart
by any means, but it's sointeresting to watch them really talk through everything,
and it's it's really cool. Amy. Let me ask you this,

(38:22):
do I mean, I know whatI think the answer is, and I
know there's an obvious answer to anybodywho's going to hear this question. But
just given the context of your lifeand the blessings that have come your way,
does money by happiness well to acertain extent, yes, But I

(38:42):
remember before Travis and I built ourLake Road we bought we built a home
in Avon Lake on Lake Road.It was a gorgeous home. We sold
it actually last year, but Iremember we went around to a whole bunch
of papses before beautiful homes on thelake, and not all of them,
but a lot of them. Wewould walk into the master bedroom when we

(39:06):
walk into the closet and we wouldsee half of the clothes are gone,
like either the husband's clothes or thewife's clothes were still there. And you
know, sometimes you see pictures turnedover, and you know, I don't
want to be gossipy or make assumptionsor anything like that, but you know,
in my mind, I just rememberthinking, like these people had everything,

(39:28):
like they had a marriage, becauseyou know, when you're a little
girl, like you want, youthink your husband's going to make you have
Like you're gonna be happy when youhave a husband, you know, or
you're gonna be happy when you havekids, or you're gonna be happy when
you have money or this amount ofmoney or this amount of money. So
money can definitely buy happiness, butto a point. And actually King Solomon

(39:49):
and Ecclesiast he says like he hadbeen chasing everything under the sun, and
no matter what it's like, youkeep out one pair of shoop while he
didn't buy shoes, but I'm saying, like I bought one pair of shoes
and then a few days later,want another pair because stuff can't really fill
us. We're not created like that, because you would access to buying stuff
like does the Lubutan bag really makeyou happy? Or is it just momentary

(40:13):
happiness? And then are you justwanting something else? Just want something else?
Yeah, it will never fill you, It really won't. Do you
have a new relationship with material thingsthe like twenty six year old in you
to the now you know, wiserversion of you, Yeah, and being
like really honest. So I didn'tgrow up with a lot of money by

(40:36):
any means. One year, mydad we actually lived in the budget in
It's not like something else, it'soff a four eighty. It's kind of
in like not the greatest neighborhood.And you know, my mom was think
my parents got divorced, so therewasn't a lot of money. And then
when Travis signed his big deal,I think I want, like I want

(40:57):
a little crazy and for a coupleof years and you know, had access
to buy, you know, prettymuch whatever I wanted. And I thought
in that moment, you know,I was like, oh, I'm so
like this is great, this isawesome. But it never lasted and it
really, I can't. I can'texplain it. It really wasn't. You

(41:19):
know. You think, well,that's gonna be great, and I'm sure
like listeners are like, well thatI'm grateful girl. You know, like
you think it's gonna be great,but it really it's just stuff, right,
because that girl who could buy thoseexpensive things was also the girl sitting
in her closet crying because somebody saidsomething so repulsive and nasty. Right.

(41:40):
And then you know, now gettingto this point wanting to be more generous,
I you know, you start tosee things and you start to see
the world and you know, likewhat I thought was great, and really,
what where I want to focus myattention. It's different. It's just

(42:04):
different. And we have seven adoptedkids from all over through Compassion International.
And I did not know that that'swonderful. No, we adopted them.
Maybe, well, it's been aprocess. Every time we go to there's
a band called Hillsong and it's aChristian band and if you've never heard them,
they're amazing and just listen to onesong. They're so good. But

(42:28):
we would go to concerts and they'rebig organization that they represent as Compassion International
and it's children from all over theworld who really have nothing, and I
have. I have a bunch ofGrace Grace Keisha, Maya, Fabio,
Naspi Eric, I think that's seven, and but my favorite the one and

(42:50):
she's nine, and she just shewrites really well. Her name is Grace.
I have two Graces in Africa andI send them. You can send
them extra money so you can sendthem a family gift or like a personal
gift like that just goes to them. And it was Christmas or her birthday
or something. And I sent them, her family a gift and her a

(43:10):
gift, and she sent me apicture of what she bought. And I've
done this, you know, gosh, I've had them for three years,
I think two or three years.And the first letter that I got she
wrote me she was like, Amy, thank you so much, like you
could tell how happy she was inthis. And she had a picture holding
two goats, and she bought twogoats and a bag of cement to finish

(43:34):
their house or to finish something intheir house. And then I just actually
got a letter from her this weekand she bought a mattress. She had
never had a mattress, and Ithink there's nine kids in her family and
she bought nine dresses. I don'tthink they were all girls, so I'm
not going to say. And thenanother bag of cement and some food obviously,
but I was just like, Wow, we have so much. And

(44:00):
how did it make you feel whenyou read that letter and saw those pictures
and what she purchased with the money. Well, you know, now I'm
emotional now. I cry all thetime, so I definitely cried. But
it just I was just so gratefulthat like, God put me in an
up, gave me this opportunity tohelp. And you know, not that

(44:21):
I don't ever, you know,go out to a nice dinner or you
know, I whatever, But really, I think what God is showing me
is I have enough. I haveway more than enough. I don't need
more money. I need to bemore generous with that money. And I
don't know what that's going to looklike in the next, you know,
forty years. I'm like, howold am I? I'm almost forty.

(44:43):
I'm like, how old am Igoing to live? How long? We
don't know? I know, you'reright, you don't know it. So
you make the most of every day, yeah, and you try to you.
You told me before we started thatyou started working with a life coach
and decided to adopt a mission statementfor yourself, which is such a great
idea. I feel like if weall did that, it could keep us
on track, especially as you meantyou had mentioned me off, I set

(45:07):
off cameras, off microphone and seethat's the TV part of me coming out
that you are a yes person.So it's really great for a yes person
if you develop a mission statement andthen make when you are asked to do
something, you refer back to thatmission statement to say, if I say
yes, is it fulfilled? That? Like? What is your mission statement?
So helping or empowering people to livea healthier life with a sovereign spirit,

(45:34):
sound soul and strong body. Soyeah, when I look at there's
so many amazing opportunities and things,and I love to I love to work,
like I've always loved to work.But if I'm going to say yes
to something, I'm obviously saying noto something else. So like if I
say yes to going here, wellI'm saying no to spending time with my
family. Or if I say yesto you know, doing this undertaking,

(45:58):
well then I can't do this undertaking over here, and not to say
that there isn't a need for it, because and I think some people are
really good at seeing needs like,oh, yes, there needs to be
a you know, healthy organic restaurantover here. There definitely needs to be
one. But that doesn't mean thatthat's what God wants me to do.
So when I when something comes across, you know, my plate, I

(46:22):
look at it and I'm like,okay, is it doing what my mission
statement has? You know, itdoesn't line up such a great idea I
do. I think that would besomething important for all of us to do.
You mentioned that you love to work, but you don't have to work,

(46:42):
right, You don't have to workfor money. You don't have to
work to pay the bills. Youdon't have to work to put a roof
over your head or to put foodon the table. But you decided to
launch a business. And what wasthe motive behind that? And the reason
behind that? So well, Isaid spirit, soul, and body.
So that was like sovereign spirit,sound, soul, strong body. I've

(47:07):
always been into healthy living. WhenI was twelve years older, he was
like the sickest kid and had todo My dad actually helped re like build
my gut, my immune system.So like I was drinking organic milk in
nineteen ninety two before, like thatwas a big thing. So I've been
on that that path for a longtime. But I kind of got the

(47:31):
order out of whack. So Iwould say like out of control, like
I'm going to control every piece offood that goes into my mouth, everything
that I drank, and it ledme to so much anxiety, like oh
my gosh, I'm going to diebecause there's Wi fi in this house or
you know it. And it causedme to have anxiety. So what I
realized I was doing was I wasfocusing so much on my body, wasn't

(47:53):
focusing on my spirit. So spiritis obviously your relationship with God and what
God says. Your soul is kindof your mind and your heart and how
you process all of that, andthen your body obviously you want to take
care of all of those things.But but I am really into that.
And um, I love skincare.You and I always like we would like

(48:14):
try I cranes, sample everything.I know. It's so weird that like
I'm like, oh, let's trythis skincare. I don't know, we
just we've always kind of loved thatkind of stuff we have and sometimes spent
money on things that I don't know, we were bamboos old. I think
YEA into some products for sure.Right look back, You're like, what
was I doing? Oh what Icould do with that? Now I spent
that money on that. Yes,I know, but I found a product

(48:37):
that I was using. The productI was just a customer I was buying.
You know, it's a direct salescompany, a social marketing company,
and I was just kind of acustomer I was. I would say I
would never ever do anything like that, Like, yeah, that is so
we you're I'm gonna sidebar you're aboy mom three. So I just like,
we don't know if the microphone willpick it up, but we're going
to hear a little feet. Ifyou hear footsteps, that's totally normal this

(49:00):
They're not screaming, so we're good. But I yeah, So I started
using this product, and I startedresearching because I'm a researcher, and I
started like digging into this company andjust saw that they were doing amazing things
to help the environment, to helppeople all over the world, to help
animals, and I love their products. So I was like, you know

(49:21):
what, I don't know who thatis that. I think Love was a
product too. He does, butI really really loved Love the product.
So I started. I was like, you know what, maybe I'll try
this, And I didn't really haveany plans for it to like blow up.
I was like, oh, I'llget a discount. That'll be great.
I know my friends will like allsupport me. Andrea, thank you

(49:43):
for the Rose facial oil. Ilove the Rose facial oil. I have
not had like major breakout since I'vebeen using it. I think it's just
a process of like I'm massaging.I know i'm sidebarring here and I'm in
a fangirl out on products, whichI know you have to go soon.
So but I think it's like justthe process of like really like massaging the
skin. Like if you're putting ina facial oil. A lot of people

(50:05):
think, like, oh my god, in oil, it's gonna make me
break out, But I'm kind ofobsessed with that product. It's one of
my favorite things that you sell.I do love it, but um yeah,
and then it kind of blew up, you know. And it's so
funny because I have I have apretty large team now and I have like
how many, um, about fourhundred and thirty Okay, so this just
started a couple of years ago.Yeah. Yeah, that's a big team,

(50:29):
amy, and it's it's a lotof fun. I love the girls,
I love working with them, Ilove meeting new people. I love
training, you know. And Ialways said I wanted somebody in Hawaii.
So like, you know, ifI ever had a big team there,
I could fly to Hawaii. AndI finally, um, I have a
consultant Hawaii now. But she's there. They have a big military base there

(50:52):
and so she won't be there verylong. But yeah, yeah, that's
okay, she was there. Yougot it. You had somebody, even
if it was just for a coupleof months. Yeah. And it's really
cool because it allows me to meetso many people. And in my root
is always you know, to spreadlove, you know, and to love
other people. Um and uh yeah, so that's that's happening, you know.

(51:16):
That's it. And where Well,we've got another little visitor joining us.
But he's just walking through. You'regoing to go into the garage.
He's gonna gode his bike around it. Okay, that's that's your little list
one right, Yes, that's isthat trip that's not knocks like trip?
And then Knox. Okay, allright, well before we go, I

(51:36):
always end every podcast asking everyone thesequestions. So I want you to fill
in the blanks on these questions becausethe the podcast is called The bounce Back,
and I do too. It camefrom my sister was the one who
came up with it because we weretalking about actually, one of my goals
is to do a Ted talk,and so I was I've applied for ever

(52:00):
all of them. We'll see.I'm pretty close with one right now,
and I'm hoping I'm going to getit. It's just like a bucket list
in life. And so I calledmy sister a couple of years ago when
I was applying for another one andI was trying to come up with a
topic. And then I was like, what do you you've heard me talk
before? What do you think mybiggest strength is? She goes, well,
I just feel like you're all aboutthe bounce back. So she was
the one who kind of came upwith that phrase, and then as it

(52:22):
sat on my brain, I thoughtthat would be cool to do a podcast
because I'm always interested in people's riseafter they fall, because I think as
human beings, at some point weall fall. But the lesson is the
work that was put into rising again, and you know, the bounce back.
Usually you have to do a lotof work self work to bounce back.

(52:45):
Although we rise and we fall rightand then we go through it all
again. But that being said,these questions kind of tap into what you've
probably learned through your life journey andyou are bounced back after you fall.
So if you can fill in theblanks on these, I know I can

(53:06):
bounce back from my challenges when whenyou know I'm like so slow, I
want to give a really good answer. When I put my faith in in
God. Okay, I'm the bestversion of myself when when I'm loving others,

(53:29):
I feel most vulnerable. When Iknow it's a big one. Um,
I would say when I am reallyhonest with myself. That takes a
lot of courage to be honest withourselves, right, like truly honest with

(53:52):
ourselves. Yes, Um, Ipractice self worth by doing what so I
do read the Bye well every dayand I journal and I write a little
bit, so I really my timespent there, I can really break things
down and get connected, Okay,and I find clarity when Oh I'm kind

(54:17):
of like you. I love goingfor walks. What's cool about you know,
we have this house in Fearview Park. I'm so close to the metro
parks, and I love we areso lucky in Ohio that we have the
metro parks. I feel like,to me, the metroparks are like the
closest I get to God. Sincewe're talking about faith in the religion,

(54:37):
like that is my time to totallyfeel connected, just because like we live
on the most beautiful planet we do. I mean, I'm sure there are
a lot of there. Maybe thedepth of the Solar system we can't get
into. There are probably others likeit, but it's just so gorgeous,
and so when you see all that'screated and you feel connected with it,

(54:59):
it's a great place to find clarity, isn't it, Yes, ma'am?
Yeah, I mean there are goodconversations that can happen out there. Well,
Amy Haffner, I appreciate you takingthe time and sharing your lessons and
sharing your stories because I know someof them are really like raw and vulnerable

(55:19):
and private and personal. So butthere's a lot that you've learned about yourself
to share with other people through them. So thank you for the hell.
Thank you so much for having me. I'm just so proud of you,
Andrea. I love you so much. I love you too, and I'm
proud of you too. And ifyou want that role facialle I was talking
about, just look up at organicAmy on Instagram and you can find it

(55:42):
that way. Just a little plugfor that, because I do love it,
all right, girl, Thank youso much, thank you, thank
you for listening to this episode ofthe bounce Back. It would mean so
much to me if you would subscribeto my podcast and rate it on iTunes
five stars would be amazing. Youcan find it on Spotify and Apple Podcasts.
Search The bounce Back and click subscribe. The FCB Radio Network first class broadcasting worldwide