Good Children

Good Children

Childhood best friends Joe Hegyes and Andrew Muscarella reminisce on their daffy and deranged childhoods growing up as closeted queer kids on Long Island. With sound bites from over two decades of archival footage and banter only 23 years of friendship can foster, you'll laugh, cry, and grow up all over again alongside these Good Children. Join the Patreon community for an exclusive bonus episode every week! For advertising opportunities please email PodcastPartnerships@Studio71us.com We want to make the podcast even better, help us learn how we can: https://bit.ly/2EcYbu4 Privacy Policy: https://www.studio71.com/terms-and-conditions-use/#Privacy%20Policy

Episodes

From The Archive: Who Drank At My 17th Birthday Party?

June 25, 2025 • 48 mins
ONE WEEK UNTIL WE'RE BACK WITH NEW EPISODES! Thanks for your patience <3 In the meantime, find us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/c/goodchildrenpod This week, travel back to a cold case from 2013 in which 12 beer cans were discovered at Joe's 17th birthday party. HOSTS: Joe Hegyes & Andrew MuscarellaLISTEN: https://linktr.ee/goodchildrenFOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/goodchildrenpod https://www.instagram....
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From The Archive: Bear in the Woods (S4E7)

June 18, 2025 • 92 mins
Thank you for your patience as we plan our next season, we'll be back shortly with brand new episodes starting in July! (Happy Pride Month, am I right?) Until then, join us for a weekend in nature that changed our lives forever.* *a few weeks. Join the Patreon community for a brand new episode every Thursday night: patreon.com HOSTS: Joe Hegyes & Andrew Muscarella FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: @goodchildrenpod @joehegyes @andrewm...
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From The Archive: Chimes and Punishment (S4E10)

June 11, 2025 • 80 mins
Did you know acapella groups participate in violent hazing rituals? This week we're taking it back to last summer, when Andrew revealed the traumatic story behind his barefooted days as a Loyola Chime.  P.S.: We're taking a short break! Join the Patreon community for a brand new episode every Thursday night: patreon.com HOSTS: Joe Hegyes & Andrew Muscarella EDITOR: Kenzie Edmondson FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: @goodchildrenpod @jo...
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From The Archive: HOW TO PUT YOURSELF OUT THERE (S2E1)

June 4, 2025 • 86 mins
Throwing it back to when we tried to be an educational podcast: "Let's learn to put ourselves out there together: from using the internet to gain notoriety as a middle schooler, to dealing with bullying and humiliation in high school, this episode gets traumatic. The boys talk about body image, their first gay dates, their most embarrassing moments, childhood crushes (Sharkboy), fear of rejection/failure lol, and the full-body expe...
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FROM THE ARCHIVE: You Get To Exhale Now, Totino (S3E21)

May 28, 2025 • 68 mins
Today we're taking it back to a particularly vulnerable conversation on sex. P.S.: We're taking a short break! Join the Patreon community for a brand new episode every Thursday night: patreon.com HOSTS: Joe Hegyes & Andrew Muscarella EDITOR: Kenzie Edmondson FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: @goodchildrenpod @joehegyes @andrewmuscarella  FOLLOW US ON TIKTOK: @goodchildrenpod @bequietjoe @andrew_musky Learn more about your ad choice...
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FROM THE ARCHIVE: Boys State (S2E25)

May 20, 2025 • 55 mins
Let's travel back to two summers ago when Andrew shared his military camp story with the world for the very first time. P.S.: We're taking a short break! Join the Patreon community for a brand new episode every Thursday night: patreon.com HOSTS: Joe Hegyes & Andrew Muscarella EDITOR: Kenzie Edmondson FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: @goodchildrenpod @joehegyes @andrewmuscarella  FOLLOW US ON TIKTOK: @goodchildrenpod @bequietjoe @a...
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FROM THE ARCHIVE: Meet You At The Mall (S1E1)

May 14, 2025 • 40 mins
Today we're taking it all the way back to our very first episode, back when we were two delusional twinks with a dream and chronic acid reflux. P.S.: We're taking a short break! Join the Patreon community for a brand new episode every Thursday night: patreon.com HOSTS: Joe Hegyes & Andrew Muscarella EDITOR: Kenzie Edmondson FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: @goodchildrenpod @joehegyes @andrewmuscarella  FOLLOW US ON TIKTOK: @goodchil...
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When Podcasting Works Out

May 7, 2025 • 79 mins
Today we're celebrating our three year anniversary with a retrospect on all of the historic moments and people we've had the pleasure of experiences in our time as podcasters.P.S.: We're taking a short break! Join the Patreon community for a brand new episode every Thursday night: patreon.com HOSTS: Joe Hegyes & Andrew Muscarella EDITOR: Kenzie Edmondson FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: @goodchildrenpod @joehegyes @andrewmuscarella  ...
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I Hate Birthday Parties

April 30, 2025 • 76 mins
HAPPY 29TH BIRTHDAY TO OUR FEARLESS LEADER: Andrew Thee Muscarella. Today we're talking all things birthday. PLUS: Meet Garrett! Join the Patreon community for a brand new episode every Thursday night: patreon.com HOSTS: Joe Hegyes & Andrew Muscarella EDITOR: Kenzie Edmondson FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: @goodchildrenpod @joehegyes @andrewmuscarella  FOLLOW US ON TIKTOK: @goodchildrenpod @bequietjoe @andrew_musky Learn more a...
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Gays in Spring

April 23, 2025 • 72 mins
This week we talk about the worst season of all time: spring. Join the Patreon community for a brand new episode every Thursday night: patreon.com HOSTS: Joe Hegyes & Andrew Muscarella EDITOR: Kenzie Edmondson FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: @goodchildrenpod @joehegyes @andrewmuscarella  FOLLOW US ON TIKTOK: @goodchildrenpod @bequietjoe @andrew_musky Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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An Episode About Sleep

April 16, 2025 • 67 mins
WE'RE WEBBY NOMINATED VOTE HERE PLEASE!Grab your PJs. Close your eyes. No seriously—close them. This week, we’re diving under the covers to talk about the one thing we all want more of and still somehow sabotage nightly. Join the Patreon community for a brand new episode every Thursday night: patreon.com HOSTS: Joe Hegyes & Andrew Muscarella EDITOR: Kenzie Edmondson FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: @goodchildrenpod @joehegyes @andrew...
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Our Favorite Subject

April 9, 2025 • 83 mins
WE'RE WEBBY NOMINATED VOTE HERE PLEASE!This episode is all about something we hold very dear to our hearts. It's long. It’s short. It’s complicated. It’s the root of wars, poems, traffic violations, and bad decisions made in locker rooms, dorm rooms, and boardrooms alike. Join the Patreon community for a brand new episode every Thursday night: patreon.com HOSTS: Joe Hegyes & Andrew Muscarella EDITOR: Kenzie Edmondson FOLLOW US ...
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The Hunger Games Made Me Not Suicidal

April 2, 2025 • 74 mins
WE'RE WEBBY NOMINATED VOTE HERE PLEASE!This week, for the third time, we are bringing you back to the woods of Long Island, 2012, as Joe and Andrew partake in a life-or-death battle against fellow high schoolers in a dramatic re-enactment of The Hunger Games. Join the Patreon community for a brand new episode every Thursday night: patreon.com HOSTS: Joe Hegyes & Andrew Muscarella EDITOR: Kenzie Edmondson FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM:...
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Can A Zoo Be Ethical? And Other Moral Debates You Expect From This Podcast

March 25, 2025 • 80 mins
This week we take a very serious look at zoos as Andrew presses Joe on the ethical boundaries of zookeepers and Joe argues for the proper care and conservation of endangered species. No, we’re not kidding, that’s what the episode is about. Join the Patreon community for a brand new episode every Thursday night: patreon.com HOSTS: Joe Hegyes & Andrew Muscarella EDITOR: Kenzie Edmondson FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: @goodchildrenpod ...
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The Midwest Is the Europe of America

March 19, 2025 • 75 mins
This week we bring you along for the ride of a lifetime as we talk through our most recent set of live shows in the midwest. From a rental car debacle that almost ended in disaster to an elevator experience some could describe as impossible, we made it through by the skin of our teeth and the synthetic fibers of our Chappell Roan wigs. Join the Patreon community for a brand new episode every Thursday night: patreon.com HOSTS: Joe...
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You (Might) Have A Phone Addiction

March 12, 2025 • 82 mins
This week we talk about our very complicated relationship to the internet, dating back to the dawn of social media and all the way up to the present day, where it’s lowkey our entire livelihood (and what that means for our mental health). We also talk about the addictive quality of going viral and how we secretly compare ourselves to each other. What happens when you think don’t measure up to your best friend? Join the Patreon com...
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Well, Well, Wellness

March 5, 2025 • 79 mins
Today we tackle wellness culture: from experiments in goop to cauliflower crust ending with some positive affirmations by Pharrell Williams. Join the Patreon community for a brand new episode every Thursday night: patreon.com HOSTS: Joe Hegyes & Andrew Muscarella EDITOR: Kenzie Edmondson FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: @goodchildrenpod @joehegyes @andrewmuscarella  FOLLOW US ON TIKTOK: @goodchildrenpod @bequietjoe @andrew_musky ...
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Jon Lovett on Math, Chipotle, & Long Island

February 26, 2025 • 75 mins
Today we're joined by Gay Long Island Podcast Royalty: Jon Lovett. From a career in political speechwriting to a stint on Survivor, Jon traces his life back to his roots: a suburban upbringing on Long Island, New York.  Join the Patreon community for a brand new episode every Thursday night: patreon.com HOSTS: Joe Hegyes & Andrew Muscarella EDITOR: Kenzie Edmondson FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: @goodchildrenpod @joehegyes @andrewm...
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The Body Keeps The Score, And, Girl, We’re Getting Our Ass Beat

February 18, 2025 • 90 mins
LAST CHANCE Tickets for Indianapolis, Chicago, and Madison HERE!! TW: Diet Culture, Body Image, and, girlllll, just some typical self-hating gays. Today we move through our journeys with fitness as we giggle and gab about workout classes. From the dark room of SoulCyle to the comfort of an at-home workout, we’ve pretty much tried everything once. Certified Personal Trainer & Fitness Coach, Andrew, talks about his complicated rela...
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If You’re In Your Darkest Hour: Click On This

February 12, 2025 • 76 mins
This week, we are back on the timeless subject of Valentine’s Day. Joe and Andrew discuss angel food cake, the devil, Instagram flirting tactics, Hailee Steinfeld, Hailee Steinfeld’s dad, Sia’s Jamaican patois, and the mental and emotional state of one of our perpetually Valentine-less hosts, who will remain unnamed. Tickets for Indianapolis, Chicago, and Madison HERE!! Join the Patreon community for a brand new episode every Thu...
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