Episode Transcript
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It's ready. Are you welcome to stop? Mom? Never told you?
From House top works dot com. Hello and welcome to podcast.
This is Molly and I'm Kristen Kristin our question for
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the day, Can you have an orgasm during choldbirth? Yes
you can? And uh, I bet people did not expect
you to say that, but that is uh the unexpected
answer that a few women are coming up with. And
because this is such sort of a sensational question, that's
why we decided to cover it. There are lots of
things to talk about regarding childbirth, and people probably don't
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think the orgasms are the number one thing to discuss,
but I think that, uh, this is a pretty interesting
uh finding and this idea gain traction a few years
ago with a documentary called Orgasmic Birth. And when you
title a documentary orgasmic birth, you better believe that some
major media outlets are going to pick up on it,
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one of which was did this segment on orgasmic Birth?
And I think the ABC ended up actually airing the
entire documentary, which was filmed by a childbirth educator named
Deborah Pascali Bonro and Orgasmic Birth is about eleven women
who have natural childbirth and a lot of the women
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choose to have their children have their babies in a
birthing pool, so they're in this it looks kind of
like a large hot tub at their house, and they
experience very pleasurable sensations some would describe as orgasms while
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having a baby. And this childbirth educator said that this
is something that's more common that we know. That's why
she made the documentary to bring awareness to this issue
and to tell women that, you know, child could feel
really good. Another O B g U I n Dr
Christian Northrop said that an orgasm during labor is basic
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science because the baby's coming down the same way the
penis came up to create the baby that they're they're
activating the same point inside the vagina. And you know, plus,
you had all these hormones that are going through your
body during childbirth, and it's it's no wonder then that
some women experience really pleasurable sensations. Yeah. North Rope describes
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these hormones that are released hearing childbirth as molecules of ecstasy,
and she's talking specifically about prolactin, oxytocin and beta and doorphins,
and Northrop is right, those those hormones are released in
a woman's body as the baby comes out of the
birthing canal. But whether or not they're molecules of ecstasy
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for every person, every woman um has probably a lot
of women out there who have had children might attest
is up for debate. Of course, when aired this orgasmic
birth segment, it created a lot of controversy. The New
York Times covered it, uh newspapers abroad covered it. Everyone
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was talking for briefly at least about this orgasmic birth
because and a lot of people were saying, these women
are crazy. But I watched footage from orgasmic birth and
lo and behold, these women do appear to be having orgasms,
and I think you know that it's definitely happening. That's
not necessarily up for debate. It's the question of whether
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or not orgasmic birth is something that should go hand
in hand with these natural birthing processes, right. Because Pascale
Bonner said that one of her missions for making the
documentary it was to show how the hospital experience should
be improved to help decrease pain for laboring women. Nor
Throb the jo and I mentioned earlier, carried on to
that and said that women need to learn how to relax,
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face their fears, lose their inhibitions so that childbirth can
become more pleasurable. And in Stroller Derby had a really
interesting response to that documentary that said, it's really misleading
to women to show that natural childbirth and orgasmic childbirth
go hand in hand. That if you just learn how
to relax and maybe do a little yoga and you
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choose to have a baby at home, these are all
different issues that you have to consider just on their own.
But she's saying, if we teach them and how to
make those decisions and then they have to expect that
everything will be great and they're going to have an
orgasm and it's just gonna be you know, roses that
that's misleading to women too, and so that was sort
of I think what the outcry about the movie was
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about is does it uh sensationalized natural childbirth? And you know,
is this even something you'd want? Do you should be
discuss it? You know. On the New York Times article
that Kristin mentioned, there were like six d comments on
this piece, and one of them was shows why are
we discussing this in polite society? So hopefully that person
isn't listening to the podcast. Right. The very concept of
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experiencing something we would link with with sexual activity with
a newborn baby just seems wrong to people, and so
that's why it generated so so much controversy. And in
response to all of those comments on the New York
Times coverage on the story about the Orgasmic Birth documentary,
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one of the women featured in the documentary, named Tamara Lartner,
wrote in to clarify things a little bit, because when
you watch her in the documentary, you see her husband
kissing and caressing her, and they're having these very intimate
moments while she's in the birthing pool, and then all
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of this builds up to an orgasmic experience for her.
But she writes in to say that there were chunks
of time when there was no touching. But I was
really surprised to learn that what I was taught was
actually true, and that kissing brings both of contractions and
eases the pain of them. It's not that just by
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you know, having these having all of those caresses, those
tender caresses. It was some kind of bedroom experience. There
was still the pain of contractions going along with that.
And she also goes on to say that the orgasmic
experience that she had did not feel like the climax
of sex, but rather sensations which were something different than
sex but similar enough that I feel okay using the
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word orgasmic. It was a wonderful feeling. And that's what
was really interesting to me and reading a lot of
these articles Christian, is that the article would always start
with the term orgasmic birth, and then by the end
of the article they were just calling it a pleasurable birth,
you know, and and like that woman said, it would
necessarily it wasn't equivalent to sexual satisfaction, but it was,
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you know, really really pleasurable and uh and it was
just really weird how it would start off very much
equated with sex and it would end with I gave
birth away. I wanted to. I felt good about it. It,
you know, it wasn't as bad as everyone said. And
that's why I think, uh stroller Derby was sort of
raising these questions of, yes, we can educate women that
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childbirth isn't something to be feared, but we don't have
to jump automatically to oh, my gosh, this is gonna
be awesome. Well, and Deborah Pascali Bona, who filmed the
Orgasmic Birth documentary, says over and over again, the point
of the documentary isn't to build up some expectation in
women's minds that they should have some kind of explosive
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orgasm as a baby is exiting their vagina, but rather
that there should be more options available childbirth options available
for women, particularly in the United States, instead of automatically
going to the hospital, laying down on your back and
having to go through this intensive she called a time
managed childbirth experience, and that when women are provided more
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natural options, for instance, not having to be on their
back but maybe allowed to be on all fours, or
being able to be submerged in a warm birthing pool,
things like that, that it can reduce the pain that
we associate with childbirth. That's what she said. The lesson
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to take away is, but I don't think I mean
this sounds this might be the strangest sentence I've said,
But I don't think we should minimalize women who have
said they've experienced no orgasm when giving birth. And I'm
thinking of one article from the Times in the UK
that had a woman's uh testimony of having an orgasm
and she you know, was sort of laboring with adula
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and having you know, sort of doing it her own way,
and she says it was exactly like having sex, that
that was the feeling she was getting. She said her
husband was just staring at her because he knew what
she was, what what was going on there and um,
she said that after the birth she wanted to share
with people what had happened at the moment she told
you know, the first friend, they were like, oh my gosh,
you're crazy. And uh, I think that any time we
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hell of woman, oh my gosh, you're crazy in regards
to childbirth, that can be kind of, I don't know, damaging.
So um, while I don't think we should say that,
you know, every woman is ever going to have an orgasm,
she said that it was really reassuring after viewing the
documentary to know she wasn't alone and having this out of,
out of body experience when she gave birth. So while
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this idea of an orgasmic birth, it's very controversial and
I'm sure that a lot of women who are listening
to this right now probably think this is the nuttiest
thing we have ever talked about. But from a more
clinical perspective, there are some O. B. G. Byans who
say that when you allow birthing to happen more naturally
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and not under such time time managed restraints, restraints as
they are in hospitals, that it does allow the experience
to be more pleasurable. For instance, in that Times article
that you're talking about Molly Um, Sheila Kinsinger, who is
a social anthropologist specializing in birth and the author of
New Pregnancy and Childbirth, says that when a baby said
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reaches a perennium, it stimulates an audit a neurotic response
known as the Ferguson's reflex. That is, if it isn't
destroyed by her being told how and when to push
And doing a little research, yes, the Ferguson's reflex does happen,
but whether or not that erotic response all is in
suit um would also be up for debate. And then
we also found a study called from from Psychoprophylactic to
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Orgasmic Birth that also describes how those quote unquote Molecules
of Ecstasy. That Dr Northrop, the O B. G. I.
N who's associated with the Orgasmic Birth documentary, was talking
about how those that range of hormones that are released
during childbirth can possibly produce those pleasurable feelings. Right. She
(10:51):
That article talks a lot about sphinkers and how all
of your sphincers when they are relaxed. Uh, it's it's
much better. And when you're being when you're having a
very stressful childbirth, that's going to close the sphincters and
make things harder on you, and learning how to relax
will make the whole process go quicker more easily. May
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I read a quote of course? Okay? Uh? The the
author Barbara A. Hoteling writes, this exquisite hormonal orchestration unfolds
optimally when birth is undisturbed, enhancing safety for both mother
and baby. Science is also increasingly discovering what we realize
as mothers, that our way of birth affects us life
along both mother and baby than an ecstatic birth. A
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birth that takes us beyond ourself is the gift of
a lifetime, which sounds great, you know for someone who's
never had a had a baby, an ecstatic birth that
takes me beyond myself. Well, that sounds much better than
you know, painful hours of screaming and sweating, And she
points out that such births are possible in the hospital. Yeah,
but you know, if you can work with a doctor
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with the midwife to create atmospe here that you need
and want, that that is possible. And you know, there
are a lot of aspects that I hope will continue
to discuss about childbirth and birthing plans and how we
want the process to go um in future episodes of
the podcast. But uh, we decided to start this way
just because it is so it's so extreme, the idea
of no sensational I mean, people freaked out when they
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a couple of years ago when that documentary came out.
And I think that you and I would both agree, Molly,
after reading all of these sources, that really that stroller
Derby stance of not discrediting the women who report having
these orgasmic experiences steering birth, but also not creating this
false expectation that that's what birthing should be like. One
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natural birth specific specifically should be like, might be the
way to go. Yeah, I think that that was a
really nice stance to take. And uh, you know, I
guess at that point this is the point where we'd
open it up to listeners. Uh. And and judging from
the New York Times comments that we and we mentioned earlier,
you know, I feel like we have an idea of
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how it will go. They're gonna be those people who say,
I can't believe you did this episode, and they're gonna
be the people who said this happened to me. And
it's it'll be interesting, I think, to see how it
shakes out. So Mom Stuff, how stuffworks dot Com is
the email, And while you're at it, let us know
what other aspects of childbirth were interested in. And while
we're While we're here, Christo, you might as well read
(13:24):
a few emails we've received. Sure, all right, I have
one here from Dana and it's about the nanny podcast.
She writes, I'm a twenty five year old female that
grew up with Nanny's and I think it was a
positive experience. I didn't come from a wealthy family, but
I had two parents that worked very hard to provide
enough for a good education and home life growing up.
(13:45):
My parents were both very career oriented, and my mother
was not going to stay home with my sister and I.
We lived outside of San Diego for some time. In
our house was a constant in and out of living
Hispanic nanny's. My sister and I loved it and quickly
learned to speak Spanish. However, that only lasted a year
and we were off to Arkansas, where we all still reside.
Even though my mother worked from an office in the house,
she could not work sixty plus hours a week and
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travel constantly, plus take care of two young girls plus
around a household, so we had lived out nanny's. I
think the overall experience was positive. I don't feel like
my mother was threatened by these nannies, and my sister
and I got to experience adults outside of our family,
often from different racial and economic backgrounds. I truly believe
this helps shape our open minded find aness and social
acceptance of anyone. Overall, I think what I came away
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with from this experience was that you could have children
and a career. My mother is the most wonderful woman
in the world to me, and I respect her imensely
for showing me that I could do anything in my life.
So thank you for that. Well, I've got one here
from Jessica, and this was in response to our episode
on female playwrights, and she talks a lot about UM
the fact that revivals, the popularity of revivals are one
(14:51):
reason why UM female written and direct place aren't necessarily
getting as much circulation as they could be. But she
also talked stout some fun facts about lady playwright. So
I thought our listeners might enjoy. So she says, across
the country, Sarah Rule was the third most produced play
right in the two thousand nine two thousand ten season,
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two out of the ten Qult surprises for drama winners
from two thousand to two thousand nine or women, and
the most expensive musical ever made, spider Man Turn Off
the Dark, was written by a woman. So thanks for
those fun facts, Jessica. And of course, if you have
anything you'd like to send our way, email us at
(15:34):
mom Stuff at how stuff works dot com. You can
also head over to our Facebook page hit us up there,
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Stuff Podcast. And then, last, or not least, if you'd
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over to our blog It's Stuff mom Never told you
at how stuff works dot com for moralness and thousands
(15:58):
of other topics. Is it how stuff works dot com.
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