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November 12, 2021 46 mins

For this Feminist Movie Friday, we dig into the 2017 film Deidre and Laney Rob a Train and talk about high school, sisterhood, family, parentification, single motherhood, mean girls, robbing trains and all the pressure. 

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Episode Transcript

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Speaker 1 (00:05):
Hey, this is Annie and Samantha and welcome to Stephane.
Never told your protection of I Heart Radio. For today's
a feminist Movie Friday. We're talking about the twenty seventeen
drama comedy crime film which is a fun um Dedra

(00:30):
and Laney Robert Train directed by Sydney Freeland, who is
a trans and Navajo director, and written by Shelby Farrell.
It stars Ashley Murray as Did Tanner, Daniel Nicolay as
Mary Gold Tanner, and Rachel Crowe as Laney Tanner. And
Freeland was born on a Navajo reservation in New Mexico

(00:50):
to a Navajo father and Scottish mother. And if you
haven't seen it yet, you can watch it on Netflix.
It's really fun. I really enjoyed the music and the visuals.
We were talking about that before Santa, that we both
really enjoyed it. Yeah, So watching it, I was like,
I get a little wary coming into teen dramas, especially
when I know, oh no, they're already set up to fail,

(01:12):
essentially like the family, the background, what's happening, And I'm like,
I don't like these stories. They made me feel phils
And as I've told you recently, for some reason, I'm
really sensitive, but everything right now. But it was so good,
it was so like uplifting. Just go ahead and put
this in. We do not condone crying of any soul.

(01:33):
We're not saying that you know, this should have happened
or whatnot, and that it was right or wrong. Just
you know, we enjoyed it for what it was we did.
I love that. Like you're imagining the headline the next day,
it is going to be smimty condoned. I'm just saying
there's too much of that past background and juvenile court

(01:53):
and juvenile at risting. Hey no, no, no, don't do it.
But I get it, but but don't do it. I thought,
I'm interested to hear your thoughts because there are some
things I was like, if that's Samantha has some some
few points on this, um, I will say, And I'm
curious about this as well. Um, it did not make
me miss high school at all, Like, not at all, right,

(02:16):
I do. I think it's really interesting. I love she
shares Amida, who has her own podcast and it is
a comic icon as well. And she was in another
recent show that I was like, she is so perfect
and her role in This made me like, think of
there's always hopefully. I'm really this is my hope is
that there's hopefully there's one who really seeks to help

(02:40):
the students out. And she's jaded and she was like,
I don't claim this whatever, But at the same time,
she knows the backgrounds and loves these kids as well
as the the woman who helps Laney and I we're
talking about it, but who helps Laney in the pageant?
I was like, huh, she's not the bad white woman
character you're I was anticipating. But yeah, I did find

(03:04):
that interesting. But I thought it was so kind. The
movie was a very kind conversation about that. But yes,
high school in itself like oh yeah, because they're jerks,
Like that's kids are mean. High school is just a
like rough, stressful, dramatic time. There's all these choices that

(03:25):
are being asked of you when you really are still
young and don't know what you want right right. I
just that was one of the first things so clearly
I was like, Wow, I really didn't. I don't miss this, right.
I think there's a lot to be said. Again, I
want to talk about it. This is a lead up,
So if you want to watch this before we start,

(03:47):
uh into our plot. You should go watch it because
obviously we're gonna spoil the hell out of it, but
in itself that I love the sister aspect, and I
guess you have to have the bad friendships so for
a lot of these plots to see the goodness of
the sister friendship, which is a whole different level. Yes,
and that's that's something we'll be talking about obviously perhaps um.

(04:09):
But before we do that, we did want to go
over the plot. So the movie centers on the Tanners,
who are a multiracial family. You've got the mother, Marigold,
father Chet, who is sort of has been out of
the picture. He shows up for a lot of it.
And then the children Dear Laney and Jet, and after
their mother is taken to jail, Deirdre and Laney decide

(04:32):
to almostly Deirdre, who convinces Laney Um decide to rob
trains to prevent Laney and Jet from being placed into
foster care and to make enough money to bail their
mother out of jail. Right. So, Dedra is a smart
high school senior who sells answers to chemistry tests to
make money in the hopes of going to college, and

(04:52):
she also expands that business as well. She also is
the valedictorian f y I and is trying desperately the
gain in college. Uh, just put that in there. She
along with her mother, also helps raise her younger siblings,
Laney and Jet. So if we talked about prognification here
it is. Once her mother is arrested after throwing an
expensive TV on the floor while working at her retail job,

(05:14):
and it's of course all seen and taped and recorded,
which makes it even worse. Is up to Dedre to
figure things out, especially when it seems that Jel is
proving to be a break from her mom's a single parenthood,
you know. And it's kind of comical in that manner,
but I've actually heard this for of those like I
actually have three meals, I actually get to sit, I

(05:37):
actually get I have to exercize, Like I don't like
the environment, but compared to what it was, hey, um So,
looking into her backyard, Dietre gets the idea to rob
trains to raise money to bail their mom out of jail.
Actually this was after her dad shows her video of

(05:57):
a train robbery with the main investigating or detective White dude. Yes,
he's the bad guy in this one. She thinks about
the side, but she knows how these trains work. Maybe
come for her. Here we go, Yes, here we go.
So Deeja convinces Laney to help her in this venture

(06:17):
of robbing trains and they do like a lot of
practices and planning and they bond as they're doing all
of this stuff. And Laney there's this whole subplot where Laney,
who was very shy um she gets picked on, has
this one friend, Claire, and not a great friend. What
do you mean an abusive toxic Friendship's a very toxic friendship.

(06:40):
It was one where I was like, is this ever
going to redeem itself? No? Okay. So Laney gets in
to the Miss Idaho pageant thinks in part to the teacher,
which really makes her friend Claire matt because Claire wanted
Laney to support her, I guess, always being kind of
the second fiddle in this relationship. Laney gets the impression

(07:01):
that her mom isn't supportive either, because her mom won
this Miss Idaho pageant and according to her, was like
going to get this reality TV so from it, but
then got pregnant and couldn't do it anymore, and Laney
really interprets that as you know, basically, their kids ruined

(07:22):
your life and we shouldn't try because we're never gonna
make it are That's what she's getting the message she's
picking up and this all infuriates Deirdre. So Dedre makes
her intermission to build up Landy's self confidence so she
doesn't always succeed. Um. Laney's friend, Claire friend and heavy
heavy quotes, continues to torment her, undermining her at every

(07:46):
turn and even tripping her and giving her a bloody nose.
Yes not cool, so I Meanwhile, Dedre, who now has
to take care of her siblings, Uh, this is a
lot of school all show impart to the fact that
she's robbing trains really concerning several folks. Again, the school counselor,
who we love, looking to help her become successful into

(08:07):
and going into college again as a way to just
for herself in a different, better school because she's got
some type of success in helping kids in going into college. Yes,
the counselor finds Dedre out and Dedre blackmails convinces her
to help them rob trains so that Dedre can afford college.
Essentially though it was this whole thing. I love this

(08:30):
movie too much. And with Yes, it kind of kind
of unfolds because they made a few mistakes, not realizing
everything that they needed to do, even though qubabe a
bit of the good planning. Yes. Um. As they're trying
to figure out everything, cop comes through, realizes, hey, teenage
kids because they accidentally got caught, and but you can't
see their faces. How you see is the back of them.

(08:53):
After realizing, hey, what is this? Oh, hey comes to
check on her, comes in, sees all the boxes, realizes
what's going on and Didra convinced her? Hey, the other
valid Victorian? Do you really want something about cast I
are just spoken and for some reason that tickled me.
It may be very Giggle was like, that's hilarious. I
don't know why, but apparently talking about cast irons or

(09:15):
valed dictorians speeches, it's funny. Um, But trying to talk
about how this other girl is not as good or
this other person is not as good as she would
be as a valed Victorian. So the counselor agrees to
be quiet about it and let her know what's going
on with this other dude that's investigating, who obviously has
a chip on his shoulder because every time someone says
Mr is like, I'm detective yes, um, which yes, so

(09:40):
now Detra's counselor is someone involved? Um? And then of
course a Didra hides the information from Laney that this
cop has come around the schools to try to figure
this out, and the dad who works for the company
also figures it out after realizing, huh, that's a gift
I gave to my child which appears out of where
it is part of the evidence of some teenagers are

(10:02):
doing something here dot dot dot um. And by the way, yes,
he is a felon. That's part of the reasons he's
not around the family. And then also he's just kind
of like the deadbeat dad that is not around the family.
And after he feel like figures it out, Oh yes,
he figures this out. He shows up at their home

(10:22):
just in time for our CPS visit, but because he's
not supposed to be there, pretends to be the uncle,
charms the CPS worker in the entire time. Pretending to
be the uncle, confronts Nada and Laney about what they've
been doing, and reveals the lady that the cops are
on their trail. Of course, yes, because Laney was very
reluctant about this whole thing, and it's kind of been like,

(10:44):
you know, any sign of trouble, we're out. And Dietrich
did not tell her that this was happening. So their
dad checked hangs around and gives them some tips and
starts working with them about robbing these trains, kind of
trying to take over the situation, claiming credit for Dietrich's work,
which is sort of a scene throughout this um of

(11:06):
taking credit for other people's work. Dedre reluctantly agrees to
accept his help, and they cook up an even bigger scheme.
But as all of this is happening, the cop is
closing in and decides to interview the students. Deirdre and
Laney get into a fight when Laney realizes that Dedra
has been setting aside money for college for her college

(11:27):
and intends to keep robbing even after they have enough
to pell out their mom, because Laney was like, once
we get enough for her to get out of jail,
we're done. And I did like this quote with the
cop where they're interviewing Didra and he finds out she's
the Valuedctorian, and he says, we're interviewing the valued ctorian.
Why are we interviewing the valedictorian? Where I was like,

(11:49):
why would you the smart person good at robbing thing? Right?
So in all of those it's obviously a small community,
very compact community, because the cop knows who they are.
He's the one that tries to deescalates the situation with
the mother when she first got arrested. So it's it

(12:10):
isn't interesting like home. We feel where they're trying to
care for each other and truly understand what was happening.
Um maybe it's compaganda. I don't know, but it did
feel nice to see that aspect of them caring for
the people in their community. Um And during this entire time,
as she's trying to think of the bigger heist, we
see Landy coming apart. Uh, lady is not doing too well.

(12:34):
She is trying to just she's just over it, ready
to rebel, moving on. Um Andy to realizees maybe she
doesn't want all of this anymore. Maybe seeing what's happening
in the bigger and bigger like they're all already in
felony level of trouble, but it's getting worse. UM and
hijacking things that are like, hey, we're talking about possibly
stealing literally meant money, which is way above the high

(12:57):
level federal crimes, so maybe we need to read think
some things. And after the boy that her ex boy
is what we're calling, who she calls against her and
the funnily like he's just a white cute boy that
she calls all of these things who he talks about
how he sells out of his grandma's radic like he's like,
who do you think I am? Practice? Like really, I'm

(13:23):
not that cool. I do this on eBay. And so
she decides to take the money, all the money and
finally bail her mom out after making sure her mom
knew that she was not happy. Um, and we had
this whole unveiling of what her mom does. But first
the CPS worker realizes that something is amiss. Uh comes
to confront the dad who she was like, I thought

(13:45):
he was the one, but instead he's like, oh wait,
let me do this and takes jet away runs away
with him. DeAndre again comes and has this confrontation with
the mom, and the mom talks about what's happened, like
she had saved all this money for her college, was
so proud of her. Got into a really bad accident
because she was so tired from working so much, and

(14:06):
therefore lost all of the money and then went into
even more debt. Uh watched there was like a teenage
pregnancy show that really just triggered her to the point
that she had her breakdown and lost it, and to
the point that the shot decided to charge her with
terrorism on top of theft, so that the head had

(14:27):
a federal consequence to that. So yeah, it was the
whole thing. And I was like, oh, and by the way,
the mom I know her from playing the main character
in Flash and I love her character and Flash, Yeah, yeah, yeah,
I thought that scene was really beautiful because until that point, Um,
it's not that you didn't as the audience, have sympathy

(14:49):
for the mom, but you're kind of like, what is happening, Yeah,
clearly your children need help, and and she was just
so like yeah, I can hear, I'm good, and then
you the scene was just really moving because it was
the money she had made from the Miss Idaho pageant
and she'd put it away and this was her like

(15:09):
explained like I never regretted you. Everyone told me it
was like a regret that I didn't get this reality show,
but I was never regret for me. And then just
having this like montage of her coming home every day
and checking the balance of how much money was in
there and she would just contribute to it no matter what,
and being so tired, and like coming home to fights

(15:31):
or too just children who had wanted nothing to do
with her. And you know, not that it's not painted
in a way like the children were terrible. It's just
what motherhood is. But she being a single mom and
being so tired, and that's why she got in the
accident and then to lose all of it after all
that time. It's really it was really well shot and

(15:53):
really really beautiful. I thought, yeah, the Flashbox, she did
a great job because you kind of already knew the story.
You'd already seen the played out. The mom was always missing,
so they would impose, like the mud, where was the mother,
and here was the mother though she was in the background,
or though she was tired, though she was she was
always there, but they just didn't see it from that perspective.
So I thought that was beautifully shot. They did a

(16:15):
great job with that, Yeah, and it was really sad.
Sometimes she'd come home and she'd be so happy, like
she'd be looking at how much money is it? It
be so happy that she comes in and her children
like are all fighting and she doesn't forget it and
hear what this um? But yeah, yeah, I thought I
really liked that scene. Okay, So the cops come down

(16:47):
to arrest Laney at the pageant um, which de Dreff
finds out about through the school counselor. Um Laney gets
in a fight with her friend Claire, and Laney is arrested.
Dedre reaches out to their dad for help, and the
counselor and the local police officer work on getting Laney out.
Deja tries to provoke the train cop who has a record,

(17:10):
and so Laney thinks that des is trying to get arrested,
but she she escapes from the school counselor and the
cop who helped her joins Dedre and she demands that
they do this together, and Deere reveals like she's planning
on recording him, like sort of losing his and then
getting him in trouble because he has his record. So

(17:31):
they succeed in this um Dedre provokes him, Laney films it,
but later the cops he's not willing to give up
and he takes Jet hostage, but their dad, Chet shows
up and punches the cop in face to free him,
and the whole thing gets recorded and the cop is
placed under arrest and Dedre negotiates with the owner of

(17:54):
the train company. Right. So, in this I think one
day waited forget to talk about is Dad, who continues
to say throughout I'm a better father when I'm gone.
When I'm not there, Um, I'm just around if you
need me, And it's obvious that he does love his children,
like as bad as it seems, Freeland never really gets
to that. He's so toxic type of level, and he

(18:16):
does run away though, after taking Jet coming to the
pageant to support his daughter, he decides he's going to
run away because that's what he does, arguing with the
toy that his son, who obviously adores him, gave to
him and to protect him, and he's arguing like, but no,
I'm a better father when I'm away though, and then
when Dietrich reaches out, he comes back and he's like,

(18:36):
it's my time, I can do this. Um, so he
does redeem himself to that certain point. But he also
does tell them, hey, isn't your DNA to be a criminal,
which doesn't really sad to me in every way it
could be. But again he does redeem himself trying to
come see him, although the ending was super weird where
he misses her. So their mom returns home just in

(18:58):
time to make sure that family doesn't get separated by
CPS because CPS has discovered everything. She charges with Dedra,
even though she is an adult eighteen year old, for
leaving the children with the father. Although as a CPS worker,
this is not how this works, but I think it
was intended. And if we want to look at history, yes,
social work and CPS has really harmed the Native American

(19:19):
community a lot. And there's still a lot to be said,
and there's a lot of leeway that gets too much
authority to CPS, especially when it comes to indigenous families
in the US. That's the side point. But I will
just say what this looks like. But you see that
happening and everything gets resolved and it's beautiful. Everybody hugs
their family comes together love it. Didra like we flashed

(19:43):
forward four months? Did packs and gets ready for college
to a tearful family goodbye. Uh, the sibling relationship between
the two sisters is really beautiful. She passes a train
and watches and thinks about her past and her future. Uh,
we to see yes, Like I said, the weird scene
the dad shows up too late to say goodbye, there's

(20:05):
a little bit of disappointment, but kind of like hey,
and then we know that there's an attraction between the
mom and dad still, so who knows what's going to
happen there and the story. Then we see, like an
end credit scene, the counselor, who is really motivating the kids,
talking about going to college and how she's going to help.
Kind of brings up the whole train robbing thing, which

(20:27):
lady laughs about. And yes, everybody's motivated, and we're all
going to pretend every single one of them went to
college and happily ever after. Yeah. Yeah, I mean it
was a nice touch because that whole time I kept
thinking like, oh, I don't leave. It's complicated, but you
get it. But I kept being like, oh no, totally.

(20:47):
Even then at the credit scenes, she's like, no, that's nice,
but she walks away. Yes, yes, yes, yes, I mean,
she went through some things with them, through some things obviously, Yeah,
And I will give it to the casting. I don't

(21:09):
know who casted them, but it was very diverse group.
I love that it was told from this perspective, from
dangerous perspective. I do love that we have a multicultural diversity.
That the villains in this movie, if there was real villains,
would have been the white men. And I see that, uh,
and in government in itself, and just a downfall of

(21:31):
a single motherhood and the constant like push back as
well as she does have a conversation about the how
she was saving money, not necessarily just for college, but
to actually apply, and they have this conversation about, like,
you could apply to the IVY leagues. You have money
to do that, and y'all it is we know this
if you've gone through the college process. And I'm guessing
it's even worse today. I don't know. It costs a

(21:53):
lot of money. I had to limit myself to sending
out I think three applications because it was like seventy
five dollars pop. M hm. At that point in time,
I was like, what is this nonsense? And as a
high schooler who whose family could not afford to do that.
I'm like, what it is set up? It is a
rigged system in a conversation, But I think Freeland has

(22:16):
done a great job and of making this in a
positive note with addressing some of the things within it. Again,
the diversity in its beautiful. I love that they are
not playing up the disgusting Hollywood tropes in that you
even though she is a main friend, she's not the blonde,
perfect shaped eight like obviously twenty five year old pretending

(22:39):
to be a high schooler who is the mayor. Like,
I like this level of like, huh, they're just kiss
this is this is what high school looked like, not
this whole supermodel level of high school. I really appreciated
that as well. Yeah, I thought that it was fun
in that sense where there were a lot of tropes

(23:01):
that I was expecting to play out one way and
then they didn't. And that was one and a lot
of people wrote about how they appreciated the body diversity
of that because she was you know, an average in
heavy quotes, but like you know, average body size for
a young girl. And there were just so many things

(23:22):
that I kept because I've seen I haven't seen a
ton of high school movies. I've seen enough, and I
would do all these tropes that you just know, and
I kept waiting for them to play out that way,
and they didn't, and I did, like, you know, it
was tackling a lot of pretty heavy stuff, but it
did it in a manner that felt hopeful and lighthearted.

(23:44):
Which you can have various conversations about those kinds of things,
but it was nice to have a presentation of it
that was not so like everything is the worse and
it's going to ruin all of your relationships and your
family sucks. I think. I think one of the things
I really appreciated about the movie is there's a lot
of traumatic experiences for childhood, and she addressed all of
these and she didn't go to in depth, but she

(24:06):
also was really careful not to trigger to me, for
those who may have experienced these things. Don't get me wrong.
If you're triggered, you're triggered, and it happens, and it
won't happen. You have no control about that. You have
no control in being triggered. Let's just be honest. We
really wish you could, because I would like to be
able to not have to you know, go through a
moment of like complete breakdown when I'm eating a certain
type of foodbare like, oh my god, I remember this

(24:28):
from my past. That was not a good moment. It
would be great if I didn't have to experience that.
But I think she has a great making sure to
keep it lighthearted. And I think that again, this is
considered a teen movie. Didn't realize this, uh, But because
of that, she wanted to tackle enough but not overwhelmed
where it's causing more trauma, which is what happens with

(24:49):
a lot of these movies in general. And again, when
we talk about inappropriate laughter and when we say inappropriate
meaning you find this inappropriate, but for us, this is
how we cope, I think this is kind along those
same lines in that field. Yeah. And also we did
pick out this movie because of his Native American Heritage Month,
and this is one of the top rated films and

(25:11):
I see why, and I love it, and I'm really
sad that it took me to go down this list
during this month to actually see this movie. Yes. Yes,
And one of the things that's really important about this
movie is that it was because so often indigenous stories
are told by people who are not Indigenous, but this

(25:32):
was an Indigenous person who was directing it and a
transperson who was directing it. Then you could just feel that.
And I thought throughout all of it, and I did.
We'll talk about that a little bit more in a second.
I did want to talk about the family aspects and
the sisterhood aspect, but first we did mention earlier pornification,

(25:53):
and that's an episode we've done in the past, um
that a lot of people. It resonated with a lot
of people, and that was something And I was watching
this always like yes, do you dress so like having
to play this role of taking care of your younger
siblings and having to take on these responsibilities on top
of like trying to get to college and on top

(26:14):
of like making money to college, all of this stuff,
and it just made me think of like this whole
idea of the hustle and how girls and women are
really being expected to do it all. Like no one's asking, right,
are you? Like is this too much? Is it? We're
just being expected? Like that's the level is you better

(26:37):
handle your own stuff and if you can't, that's on you, right,
Like what we see is the very like small slim
bit of the mother where she's just working and you
don't know what's happening to where we realize what she's
done trying to do for the family. Um. And then
we come to the father who literally has not paid
any child supports but hands over thirteen dollars. Yeah, but

(26:59):
we all so see that he leaves toys on the
train track for his son like it's it's very cute
the way he does it. Again, that does not absolve
him from what he is uh done in the past
and continues to do uh for the to the kids essentially.
But yeah, and we do see that breakdown as the
oldest sibling taking care of her her family, taking care

(27:21):
of her siblings, trying to find her own way in life,
really trying to come out of something that's that she
wants the more in that conversation, and then having the
breakdown of being an eighteen year old and figuring out
how to get out of a thing that she doesn't like,
but also being loyal to her family, so that divide
with her like taking the money and trying to make

(27:42):
more money and then getting caught up in making that
money is this whole big thing, and it is that
that is the complication, and that is part of that
conversation we had about promnification, feeling guilty when you're older
because you are trying to take care of yourself and
that is so unnatural. So that conflict and we do
get to see that, especially when it comes down to it.

(28:03):
And I think they did a smart job in making
this like two older sisters, because the whole complex, and
she would even more complex to have an older brother
and an older sister, because that complicated of who's going
to be the caretaker is often laid on the girl
no matter what typically, and especially when it comes to healthcare, childcare,

(28:23):
all of that. Yeah. Yeah, And I mean when I
was watching it, I just kept thinking, like, you're so smart,
She's so smart that she's bored. She made I was like, daily,
that's really good. Yes, but like as you said that,
there were just all these things where she was set
up to fail, all these obstacles working against her, and

(28:48):
it's just watching it, I was just exhausted, Like this
is way too much. I could not imagine trying to
figure out how to pay for the bills with the
power going off, how to fight off CPS two, keep
your family together, So being the caretaker and constantly being
there as well as realizing I need to do this
for my mom who seems to not care. I don't

(29:09):
know what's happening, but she seems to not care. On
top of the fact that she's trying to live her
own life, which she really had high hopes for which
was dashed within a day. And I think it's also
like this conversation for her to not be her mother.
So when Dedra is talking to Laney about her I
don't understand why this pageant is a big deal for you.

(29:31):
We need all these other things we need to think about,
you know, the basic needs of our home. And then
hearing what happened between her mother and Laney, and then
hearing what's happening between Laney and the friend, and realizing
the bigger you know, casualty in this level for her, like, oh,
she is already low in confidence, but now we're really
killing her spirit. And I'm part of this because I'm

(29:54):
not I'm kind of putting on the mother phase of
doing my own things and trying to do to care
for the bab knees. Once again, is that bigger conversation
in homes that are financially and economically. In trouble is
that you can't get to these bigger knees, these these
emotional traumas because you're trying to care for the basic needs,

(30:14):
and it becomes problematic in itself. And though they are
doing the damned best they can, they're still that giant
part missing and it can go awry. Mm hmm. Yeah.
Watching it, I I just felt like, even though they
went about it in such different ways, the mom and
Didre had kind of the same, like this ambition of

(30:37):
like more, and for Deedre, I feel like she lost
for a minute, she lost herself in it where she
was just like we could keep going um and she
had to have that kind of human moment with her
sister where she was like, no, we were just going
to do this to get her mom out, like I
thought we were going to stay together. But I do

(30:57):
think that narrative was really really interesting. I think that
there was that whole kind of narrative of pushing marginalized
communities into crime for this basic survival and then blaming
these communities for it, because I mean, what else were
they gonna do? Like like when that guy says like, oh,

(31:20):
it's about Victorian, why would it ever be the v Victorian. Well,
there's so much working against you, right, then this is
option for you, and especially like for children for trying
to keep their family together. I don't know, I just
felt so it made sense, like your options are so few,

(31:45):
then rob train. Right. This is the whole conversation with
this as well, when we're talking about marginalized communities and

(32:05):
again what I've seen and I don't think we have
anybody in our listenership that would ever argue that these
possibilities could happen. But the fact of the matter is
when the cards are stacked against you, there's only so
much you can do. And of course this was the overarching,
like obviously sarcastic response of we're gonna rob a train,

(32:27):
you know, because that sounds ridiculously like implausible. But when
I see oftentimes and it's not necessarily that they're just
going for needs, it is literally a conversation of I
don't understand why we can't do this, but they can.
And it's this conversation that I've had for a long time,

(32:48):
and then within my social work community of like part
of this problem is, yeah, these kids are angry. The
movie in itself was like finding basic needs, realizing they
can do it, realizing they can get away with it.
So going for the more uh for this specific plot.
But what I've seen specifically in marginalized communities is that
they are angry because they're not afforded that same level

(33:08):
of privilege, and so they will do what they can
to try to equal it out or even it out
with no regards to others, because there's no regards to them.
You know, there's just this pattern of this conversation that
we have to have that, Yeah, when you talk about
what is happening, and it feels so when someone is robbed,
it feels like you're being violated. I get it, I

(33:30):
see it. But when we talk about the underlying issues
of some of the things that are being stolen are
iPhones and and silly things, but at the same time
it's like, but it's a luxury, but at the same time,
it's a status. And there is also this conversation of
how we are pitting are because against each other when

(33:51):
it comes to items like this, as well as the
fact that people are tired of having to do the basic.
I get tired of doing the basic. I am fairly privileged.
I get it. But as the person who was doing
three jobs at one point in time, I was really
wishing I could have been that one person was like, Man,
where's my uncle. Where's my dead uncle? Who's gonna give
me a hundred thousand bucks? Uh? Because he's dead now,

(34:13):
Like I really wish I could have had that one.
But the fact of the matter is I don't. I
don't want anyone to die. But all of that to
say is that there is that level of like, yeah,
you have a whole level of privilege when things are
not equal, and then because it's not equal, you're not
able to meet the equity that needs to happen in
order for things to be balanced out because equal no
longer becomes the even playing field. It just makes you

(34:36):
realiended some more and hope you can be okay again
being a conversation and we're making this a really big thing,
and I get really needed about it. I know I do.
But there's this conversation of yes, we are creating and
fostering a community and an environment that says this is
your only option. Good luck with it, survive. Yeah, And

(34:59):
I mean this was a it, like we said in
a lighthearted movie. And I think that there are considerations
to keep in mind. But the way it was, I
think it was beautiful and it presented all this all
these issues in a way that didn't feel so like upsetting.
But at the end and they were like confronting the
cop and recording, and I was like this terribly, Like

(35:22):
I was scared because of our real world issues and
how that could have gone. And I kept thinking, you know, yeah,
this is these kids did this because they thought they
had to, and then they could have died for it, right, Yeah,
I found that interesting with the fact that again I
think it also equates to the one with a superiority

(35:45):
complex really needing to solve a crime and gave no
care to who it was affecting. And when he makes
the statement of it doesn't matter, all I need is
that arrest, which is yeah, it's an implication too. Yeah,
that's the belief of a lot of law and order.
And that's part of the problem as well, which is
also when we talk about the loss of life in

(36:06):
general and then talking about well, they shouldn't have done
these things, but like, but no matter what they did,
they didn't deserve to die. They didn't deserve that. What
is happening and it's kind of that same lines of, uh,
I assume you're a bad person because people in your
life are bad people, or and or whatever the situation
may have been. The system is corrupt, so therefore I

(36:28):
will I will use my assumptions on you, and that
will be law, that will be the instatement. And I
think again they did play this out well as well
as the fact that, like I did see a feeling
I don't know about you. When Dejo walks away from
the white cop, the white cop looks really confused, and
she looks like she feels guilty for ruining his job.
And I don't know if that's the case, but she

(36:50):
has a weird look. It's not satisfaction. It's not satisfaction.
When I my first take was it was like confusion,
like she didn't know how to feel. But yeah, it
wasn't satisfaction. It was definitely more of a mess of emotions,
I think again having to do what she had to do.

(37:12):
Mm hmm oh. And then I did want to briefly
touch on We've talked a little bit about single motherhood
throughout this, but I do think I appreciated the way
um this movie presented the complexities of that, like you
had the prunification aspect, but she also saw the mother's
side and you understood it like it you get, yeah,

(37:35):
doing what she had to do, doing what she had
to do, doing the best she could a lot of things,
and the systems set up against her. But yeah, it's
just when you see that scene when she finally was
like no, I was saving up for this, and he
just thought, Wow, even in this little montage, I'm exhausted
for you, like so much that is being put on

(38:01):
put on her getting it's just constant having to fight
in having to work and having to do all this
stuff and being tired, right, it's kind of the vibe.
I I think it's an interesting concept to be able
to see the main point of view for the sibling.
So it's setting up for Didre and her sister as

(38:22):
the main characters, and then you see like the peripheral
oh yeah, yeah, yeah, as a kind of like, hey,
it's not as completely as this as well as the side.
I think it's a reminder for Dedra, which is not
for everyone, that she does have people there for her.
She just it's a different way than what she needs sometimes, right, right,
And that's not to say, like, as we said that
portification episode, that that can have major issues and long

(38:46):
term impacts. But I liked that they presented the single
mother is like, well, this is what she was dealing
with two Like, it was very complex and I thought
very fleshed out of like they all had these things
that they were dealing with, and there's is a complicated
conversation again when you don't have outside support, and we've
talked about that and what does this look like and

(39:07):
doing your damned this so that you can keep the
family together. Yes, yes, um, And speaking of I mean,
one of the most beautiful aspects that we've been talking
about it was this bond of the sisters throughout the
movie and seeing it grow. And I did really love
how we got to see them kind of like be
happy with each other and build each other up, and

(39:27):
then they'd have these fights, and it was really nice
to see them like makeup from the fights as well,
Like it was always a pretty like, oh, no, I've
done wrong, I want to make up for it, which again, yet, look,
these are teen kind of comedy drama movies, so that
doesn't always happen in real life. But it was nice.
It was like refreshing to see this sister relationship bloom

(39:51):
and have them support each other and really like fill
in the gaps of where the other person was missing
and like needed that support. It was really really really lovely.
I thought it was. Yeah, yeah, yeah, definitely the heart
of the movie. I would say though, it was I
feel like the mother at that and that was that

(40:11):
was good. That was good. And then yes, representation, as
we said this was it was refreshing also to see
this an Indigenous story that was told from an Indigenous voice,
because that doesn't happen often enough. And I did think
that was interesting as well, because there was a theme,
as I said, throughout the movie of um taking credit

(40:34):
for other people's work and what other people have done,
and I thought that was that was pretty fascinating because
that has been what has happened a lot when it
comes in terms of these Indigenous stories and who's making
them and who's getting the credit for them. But you
see like Dedre and Laney be like, no, you're taking

(40:56):
credit for what I've done. You're taking credit for all
the work that I've put into something. And I was like, yeah,
I think they did. Again, we talked about how the
school like really looked like an actual what I would
have thought of as the high school when I saw
as a high schooler instead of the glam squad that

(41:16):
was like territorially around. I definitely had a friend like
Claire definitely did not to that extreme, but Boo like
trying to like gaslight me and so that that could
be her, you know, hype girl essentially and never really
being the center of anything and everything like that wasn't lovely. Um,
it wasn't in high school tho. It was more middle school.

(41:37):
But like seeing that as a representation, but yeah, I
think like having those kind of like looks and seeing
what was happening with that, it was it was good
to see in that level, Like not necessarily like I
don't want everybody to be like high school is awful,
but insentially like the actual look of the high school.
They actually used the real people what you would see

(41:58):
instead of this glam looking squad. And yeah, like everybody
being represented well and like the diversity throughout. So it
was nice to see that on top of yeah, yeah,
and I think plenty of storylines, Like I said, they
didn't go how I thought, and they kind of resolved
in a way that felt more realistic in comparison to

(42:19):
these high school films, glam films that you're talking about,
where I was like, yeah, yeah, get you're getting to
fight at pageant. Yeah, uh, that seems about right. Yeah,
And I did appreciate that as well. And I thought
it was a pretty accurate depiction of high school, uh
in a lot of ways. And it was interesting to

(42:40):
see Laney, like she's struggling with this self confidence and
like being in this pageant and kind of figuring out
like her personality through that, or at least the personality
like she'd been too afraid to perhaps show in front
of people. And I did want to touch on two
before we finish up here. I think that shame was

(43:03):
a big theme throughout this of where you live and
where you go to school and where you work and
what you can afford and like what money offers you.
And I just thought that was pretty powerful like throughout it,
like I feel like there were a lot of things
in the family they didn't share because of shame, because

(43:24):
they were ashamed, Like the mom was ashamed of what
she felt was like too little she could offer, and
Dedre was kind of ashamed because she wanted to go
into this you know, big college or nice college and
get out of where she was when she she wrote
on her like application like anywhere two hundred miles from
here or something like just a lot of a lot

(43:45):
of this shame and how it kept a lot of
the characters quiet about things that you know, if they
hot and felt shame of it, and then they could
have talked about it and then maybe they wouldn't have
had these issues. But it's all so like the shame
is a lot of societal stuff like right, well, I

(44:06):
mean we definitely touch on a little bit. Again they
don't go too deep, but like about mental health with
the mother having a breakdown and what that looked like
and we didn't know exactly why, and honestly, when you
first meet the mom, you really think there may be
a psychiatric level of needs that we don't understand. They're
not going to talk about, but we see what that
goes through. And then the shame that Laney has called

(44:27):
out for her mom's actions at one point in time,
Laney being shy and really trying to find any competence
whatsoever to be seen in general. Again, she talks about
how she just doesn't know anything, she's not good at anything.
You have the teacher trying to encourage her. I will say,
I feel like that was the biggest fantasy level that
everybody in the school was supportive of them. I was like, well,
you know that's not always true, especially of those who

(44:49):
are in the marginalized community. But I do love that this.
I wish it was a thing, right right, Yeah, but yeah,
we both really enjoyed this movie. We recommend it. You
have Netflix, it's on there. Um, it's yeah, it's a
it's a fun watch. It's not that long if you're

(45:11):
looking for something, it's not trauma, and it's like you
can you can sit and enjoy and laugh like it's
a it's a thing, and then just have a moment.
You do have a little bit of willing suspicion of
disbelief there, a little bit like I said, I guess
I'm too caught up in that world. I'm like, that's
not how I turned out. Yeah, for sure, there were
moments where I was like, oh no, but that's true

(45:33):
with a lot of the things. But that doesn't make
it any less as good as it is. Like we
would tend to recommend, yes, go check it. Out and
then let us know your thoughts and also what movie
should we watch next? Keep coming. Yes, you can evail
us at Steff Media, Mom Stuff and I Hurt Me
here dot com. You can find us on Twitter at
moms podcast or on Instagram with stuff Whatever told You. Thanks,

(45:54):
It's always to our super producer Christina. Thank you and
thanks to you for listening Stuff whenever told you His
protection by Heart Radio from all podcast on my Heart
Radio is via her radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever
you listen to your favorite shows,

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