January 3, 2022 • 14 mins
SMNTY rings in the new year chatting about goals, traditions, identity, and what we're excited about and keeping an eye on for 2022.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:05):
Hey, this is Danny and Samantha, and welcome to stuff
I've never told you proectually. I heart radio. Do you
throw yourself off by the introduction? I threw myself off
on the introduction? You know. I have to still write
(00:25):
it down, even though we've been doing this many years,
and I still mess it up, and sometimes I'll even
mess up my name, and so for a while I
was right, that's amazing. I still write it down to
even though I'm not the one that's doing the introduction
at all. I never do well. I appreciate that. I
(00:45):
appreciate that a lot. Well. Okay, off on that start,
wonderful start. As this comes out, it is officially January two,
which some have that correct me because I wrote down
already making that mistake. Granted we're recording previously to this,
(01:06):
so it's okay, yes, thank you, thank you. I'm sure
it will happen plenty, even though two is my favorite number. Yes, yes, yes,
So we're hoping you're all doing well and you had
a nice New Year's um and so yeah, cheat, we
are recording this December, so it's like a message from
(01:28):
the past. But what do you suspect do you have
any plans that you're gonna do on New Year's Eve
or New Year's Day, How do you think you're going
to spend it? I have no idea because there are
so many ups and downs and new things that are
happening for this year. I've already kind of shared that
this is my first time that I'm gonna be spending
with my partner's family for Christmas, and it feels weird.
(01:51):
So I've never done holiday exchange, essentially where you go
with your partner to whatever. He came with me to Thanksgiving.
I'm going with him to Christmas. But since his family
lives out of state, of course you wouldn't do it extended,
and my family do not a lot of states. They
just get one day visit. So I have no idea
(02:11):
because we have no plans, and you and I are
trying to make sure that we do have some time
off from the typical recording schedule. So who knows. But
my favorite thing to do is to sit on the
couch with my dog. I think last year I was
wearing a comfy so we'll see how cold it is
(02:31):
this year, whether I find a onesie comfy or my robe,
which I do look like a nice suburban mother in
my robe, something along those lines, drinking a little bit
of champagne just to say Happy New Year, on the couch,
do some texting, going to bed. That's what I assume
(02:52):
is going to happen. Do you ever do anything on
the day? Uh? So you and I have done this,
but yeah, Typically I will go out and search for
the typical US tradition of getting colored greens, black eyed peas,
corn bread. What's the other one? Usually it's a pork yes,
some kind of pork dish or such. Uh, And I
(03:13):
will go and search for that. So whether it's going
to restaurant, a barbecue restaurant, which we I have a
favorite here that I go to and we're going to
pick up food to bring it, I do go into
search for that. That is my tradition. Yeah, yeah, I
anticipate something similar. I like, I have a I have
a thing with numbers, and also I'm very sentimental, so
(03:36):
I usually try to choose the movie that meant the
most to me that year, the year I watched that,
So it ends right around midnight, and then I watched
the movie that I want that is my favorite movie,
or the movie that I'm like into the most right
then to start the new year. It doesn't have to
(03:59):
happen right at midnight, but the day of I watched it.
It's the first movie I watched Lately. I have been
getting mac and cheese. Ye already got it? Start this tradition.
We did. Yes, Yeah, we were at a local bar
and I don't know why, I just got it in
(04:19):
my head that I needed mac and cheese. Now it's
just become I need mac and cheese. Were at a
local bar on like New Year's near New Year's near
New Year's Eve. It was the day before. Was it
the day before? Because we had made it plans we had, yes,
and we were doing a gift exchange. Yeah, that's the
year I gave you that doll size mattress. Actually, I
(04:40):
have an echo show that shows all my pictures from
like my little Amazon photo. This is not a sponsor Amazon's.
I know the devil, so we're not gonna go to
into it. However, that picture from the bar that we
took pops up pop up right now, that's so cute.
It was. This is me ignoring your comment about you
(05:00):
a gift. Fair enough. She did not like it. It
was a joke. I thought it was hilarious. Um, I
appreciated it. Yeah, and then we usually send pictures of
each other, of ourselves and onesies to each other or
something like that, and then the next day I also
make the traditional Southern meal, but I've started doing it
(05:22):
in soup form because I'm just like one person, so
it's easier for me to make it. Also with the
supply chain stuff, I've already got all the ingredients because
they're all can stuff, so I don't have to worry
about it. But it's just yeah, colored greens, black eyed peas,
and sausage and then a hash champagne. That's usually I
mean in my college years, it was usually a day
(05:43):
of um being hungover, but now it's not more of
a relaxing Yeah, I watched what movies I like? I'll
play like, I'll probably play the last was too. I
like to start with my favorite things at first day. However, yes,
because we live in such a right now, everything feels
up in the air and scary, and every time you
think something is getting better, it gets worse. And last
(06:04):
year we had an insurrection right after the New year. Like,
uh it is. It has become something that I'm like oh,
just please don't something. Do you have any like goals
(06:30):
or anything you're looking forward to. I'm I'm I'm being
open about like everybody, beat chill with the resolutions and goals.
Be easy on yourself. You can still make them. I
can't control anything you do, nor what I want to,
but I'm just saying I think it's okay to do
something that um like mine for instance, is going to
(06:53):
be take better care of yourself. And I have kind
of some specifics around that, because I know if you
don't have a specific I'll never do it. But I
just kind of really let a lot of things go
through this pandemic, which I think, again, it's stressful and
that's okay, but my body is starting to it is
speaking up about its happy. Welcome to my world. Yeah,
(07:16):
I think I don't really have I've never done the goals.
Of course, when I was younger, thinking I wanted to
have a relationship and be the perfect woman, I had
all of these traditions that I pulled from different things
around the world, and I'll go, well, let me try this,
maybe this is a better luck. But for me, I
(07:36):
think I want to definitely I've been talking about this
and I've started to get a little more prepped up
into finding identity stuff. I've started experimenting with actual Korean
food and creating it myself, and I stay delving into
those memories again. So I think I'm going to try
to do more. I've already got my little list of
things that I want to try. Whether I throw it
(07:59):
out into maybe telling my story, connecting with people about it.
That's that would be a bigger goal for me, to
truly sit down with it instead of being so fearful
of it. And then part of that also accumulates to
being lost, feeling lost a lot, so trying to kind
of focus in on that and just just allow it
(08:21):
to be there. I will say I've taken some time
off from being retraumatized because when I was working in
social work, I was so traumatized all the time that
actually words, I'm like, oh, I don't have to think
as deeply into this or have to live in this
as much. So I've kind of just taken a break
from that, including like anything too familiar that was from
(08:41):
my job in social work or from my own trauma
past I was trying to ignore all together. So it's
really trying to dig into that a little more because
I think I'm in a better trauma related space as
versus to the regular social stress anxiety thing that we
I think y'all will be able to kind of get
a preview of soon, but I think I'm in a
(09:05):
better place to search those questions for myself at forty
and yeah, just realizing loving being able to be at
forty and feeling like, Okay, I still feel like I'm
twenty two, which is why we talked about, you know,
my first episode of Are We Failures, because it's it's
like I may have aged out on some of the
things I still continue to do or haven't done, but
(09:28):
being happy and where I am um with that and
still trying the new things even though it feels tiresome. Yeah,
and were triggering, Yeah, Yeah, I mean it's always like
big proponents of self care and taking care of ourselves.
(09:49):
But on a entertainment note, I'm really looking forward to
Spider Verse the sequel, thanks to everyone who sent me messages.
I'm looking forward to the last of as TV show obviously,
and all the Star Wars and Marvel stuff, So that's
that's exciting. We did want to quickly go over some
(10:11):
things we're watching out for as we go into one
of the big ones being an unfortunately abortion. Yes, we've
already talked at length. I guess the last year that
we can say that was happening, but we're still very
much keeping an eye out for what's going to happen
in the future because it also does affect the Bonds
(10:32):
Against Women's Act. I was just thinking about that recently,
UM and funding in general, and we already know conversations
about the High Amendment that's been had, the conversation about
the gag rule which has been appealed but still in
place for states, and we know all of that, but
definitely watching to see what the Supreme Court is gonna do.
Definitely watching to see if President Biden is going to
(10:53):
to uh expand the Supreme Court, what that looks like.
We're gonna see if the testimonies of Kavanaugh and co
and Barrett actually hold to their word saying that it
didn't need to be changed since it was already established.
But we know there's a lot of backtracking to that.
UM her insensitive conversations about adoption. I'm not gonna flye.
(11:17):
It triggered me. It triggered me a lot, and there's
a lot of bigger conversations I want to have about that,
but yeah, it's it's interesting to see. And we are
very cautious excited about the FDA ruling, cautious about what
that looks like when the Supreme Court does decide to
tackle the Mississippi law. Also very nervous about what's gonna
(11:37):
happen at state level because we know, again we talked
about it previously. We are we Annie and I are
in Georgia, which is a southern state, though you know
we all we did we were blue, essentially saying that
we as a state gave votes to Biden. So that
was delightful, but we already know things are changing. So yeah, nervous, yes, Well,
(11:59):
speaking of that, we have Stacy Abrams running for governor. Yes, yes, yes, yes,
I started her campaign and announced it as a governor
finn only enough. David Purdue is back as well, who
felt miserably in his Senate run, thank god, and I
(12:20):
say miserably in that he really didn't know what to
do with the Trumpian I guess tactics that weren't working
in Atlanta because the black women and women of color
in Georgia fought fiercely and victoriously to rally the people essentially,
(12:42):
no matter whatever big things. But well, we'll I'm interested
to see how he does it because I think he's
coming back as a trumpion essentially, and I say that
not condescendingly, but kind of doing the platform of promising
to bring Trump back. So that's his tactics. So it'll
be interesting to see what goes out essentially. But yeah,
(13:02):
I think we all, as a community of sminthy maybe
this is just too much of a generalization, are pretty
big fans of Stacey Amrams. Maybe it's just me. I
feel like it's not. Um So very excited to see
what happens. Hopefully we're gonna make a big turnaround. Also
coming up in a probably a few weeks, our friend
Melody is coming back with some exciting news. You've been
(13:25):
listening to us talking about voting in Georgia for the
last year. So excited. Yes, yes, so look after that,
also related, we are going to be watching what happens
with the Voting Rights Acts and all that stuff around
that and jerryman ring. Yeah, I mean, these are just
the things on on top of our mind right now.
There's a lot going on that we're gonna be talking
(13:46):
about and listeners. As always, we want to know what
you want to hear, what's on your mind, what should
we be discussing. Um You can email us at Stephidia
Mom stuff at I Heard media dot com. You can
find us on Twitter at Mom's podcast or on Instagram
and stuff I've never told you. Thanks. It's always to
our super producer Christina. Thank you, thank you and happy
(14:06):
in your years and thanks again for listening. Steph I
never told you. The substection of ihiar radio. For more
podcast my Heart Radio, visit the radio app, Apple Podcasts,
or wherever you listen to your favorite shows
Hey, this is Danny and Samantha, and welcome to stuff
I've never told you proectually. I heart radio. Do you
throw yourself off by the introduction? I threw myself off
on the introduction? You know. I have to still write
(00:25):
it down, even though we've been doing this many years,
and I still mess it up, and sometimes I'll even
mess up my name, and so for a while I
was right, that's amazing. I still write it down to
even though I'm not the one that's doing the introduction
at all. I never do well. I appreciate that. I
(00:45):
appreciate that a lot. Well. Okay, off on that start,
wonderful start. As this comes out, it is officially January two,
which some have that correct me because I wrote down
already making that mistake. Granted we're recording previously to this,
(01:06):
so it's okay, yes, thank you, thank you. I'm sure
it will happen plenty, even though two is my favorite number. Yes, yes, yes,
So we're hoping you're all doing well and you had
a nice New Year's um and so yeah, cheat, we
are recording this December, so it's like a message from
(01:28):
the past. But what do you suspect do you have
any plans that you're gonna do on New Year's Eve
or New Year's Day, How do you think you're going
to spend it? I have no idea because there are
so many ups and downs and new things that are
happening for this year. I've already kind of shared that
this is my first time that I'm gonna be spending
with my partner's family for Christmas, and it feels weird.
(01:51):
So I've never done holiday exchange, essentially where you go
with your partner to whatever. He came with me to Thanksgiving.
I'm going with him to Christmas. But since his family
lives out of state, of course you wouldn't do it extended,
and my family do not a lot of states. They
just get one day visit. So I have no idea
(02:11):
because we have no plans, and you and I are
trying to make sure that we do have some time
off from the typical recording schedule. So who knows. But
my favorite thing to do is to sit on the
couch with my dog. I think last year I was
wearing a comfy so we'll see how cold it is
(02:31):
this year, whether I find a onesie comfy or my robe,
which I do look like a nice suburban mother in
my robe, something along those lines, drinking a little bit
of champagne just to say Happy New Year, on the couch,
do some texting, going to bed. That's what I assume
(02:52):
is going to happen. Do you ever do anything on
the day? Uh? So you and I have done this,
but yeah, Typically I will go out and search for
the typical US tradition of getting colored greens, black eyed peas,
corn bread. What's the other one? Usually it's a pork yes,
some kind of pork dish or such. Uh, And I
(03:13):
will go and search for that. So whether it's going
to restaurant, a barbecue restaurant, which we I have a
favorite here that I go to and we're going to
pick up food to bring it, I do go into
search for that. That is my tradition. Yeah, yeah, I
anticipate something similar. I like, I have a I have
a thing with numbers, and also I'm very sentimental, so
(03:36):
I usually try to choose the movie that meant the
most to me that year, the year I watched that,
So it ends right around midnight, and then I watched
the movie that I want that is my favorite movie,
or the movie that I'm like into the most right
then to start the new year. It doesn't have to
(03:59):
happen right at midnight, but the day of I watched it.
It's the first movie I watched Lately. I have been
getting mac and cheese. Ye already got it? Start this tradition.
We did. Yes, Yeah, we were at a local bar
and I don't know why, I just got it in
(04:19):
my head that I needed mac and cheese. Now it's
just become I need mac and cheese. Were at a
local bar on like New Year's near New Year's near
New Year's Eve. It was the day before. Was it
the day before? Because we had made it plans we had, yes,
and we were doing a gift exchange. Yeah, that's the
year I gave you that doll size mattress. Actually, I
(04:40):
have an echo show that shows all my pictures from
like my little Amazon photo. This is not a sponsor Amazon's.
I know the devil, so we're not gonna go to
into it. However, that picture from the bar that we
took pops up pop up right now, that's so cute.
It was. This is me ignoring your comment about you
(05:00):
a gift. Fair enough. She did not like it. It
was a joke. I thought it was hilarious. Um, I
appreciated it. Yeah, and then we usually send pictures of
each other, of ourselves and onesies to each other or
something like that, and then the next day I also
make the traditional Southern meal, but I've started doing it
(05:22):
in soup form because I'm just like one person, so
it's easier for me to make it. Also with the
supply chain stuff, I've already got all the ingredients because
they're all can stuff, so I don't have to worry
about it. But it's just yeah, colored greens, black eyed peas,
and sausage and then a hash champagne. That's usually I
mean in my college years, it was usually a day
(05:43):
of um being hungover, but now it's not more of
a relaxing Yeah, I watched what movies I like? I'll
play like, I'll probably play the last was too. I
like to start with my favorite things at first day. However, yes,
because we live in such a right now, everything feels
up in the air and scary, and every time you
think something is getting better, it gets worse. And last
(06:04):
year we had an insurrection right after the New year. Like,
uh it is. It has become something that I'm like oh,
just please don't something. Do you have any like goals
(06:30):
or anything you're looking forward to. I'm I'm I'm being
open about like everybody, beat chill with the resolutions and goals.
Be easy on yourself. You can still make them. I
can't control anything you do, nor what I want to,
but I'm just saying I think it's okay to do
something that um like mine for instance, is going to
(06:53):
be take better care of yourself. And I have kind
of some specifics around that, because I know if you
don't have a specific I'll never do it. But I
just kind of really let a lot of things go
through this pandemic, which I think, again, it's stressful and
that's okay, but my body is starting to it is
speaking up about its happy. Welcome to my world. Yeah,
(07:16):
I think I don't really have I've never done the goals.
Of course, when I was younger, thinking I wanted to
have a relationship and be the perfect woman, I had
all of these traditions that I pulled from different things
around the world, and I'll go, well, let me try this,
maybe this is a better luck. But for me, I
(07:36):
think I want to definitely I've been talking about this
and I've started to get a little more prepped up
into finding identity stuff. I've started experimenting with actual Korean
food and creating it myself, and I stay delving into
those memories again. So I think I'm going to try
to do more. I've already got my little list of
things that I want to try. Whether I throw it
(07:59):
out into maybe telling my story, connecting with people about it.
That's that would be a bigger goal for me, to
truly sit down with it instead of being so fearful
of it. And then part of that also accumulates to
being lost, feeling lost a lot, so trying to kind
of focus in on that and just just allow it
(08:21):
to be there. I will say I've taken some time
off from being retraumatized because when I was working in
social work, I was so traumatized all the time that
actually words, I'm like, oh, I don't have to think
as deeply into this or have to live in this
as much. So I've kind of just taken a break
from that, including like anything too familiar that was from
(08:41):
my job in social work or from my own trauma
past I was trying to ignore all together. So it's
really trying to dig into that a little more because
I think I'm in a better trauma related space as
versus to the regular social stress anxiety thing that we
I think y'all will be able to kind of get
a preview of soon, but I think I'm in a
(09:05):
better place to search those questions for myself at forty
and yeah, just realizing loving being able to be at
forty and feeling like, Okay, I still feel like I'm
twenty two, which is why we talked about, you know,
my first episode of Are We Failures, because it's it's
like I may have aged out on some of the
things I still continue to do or haven't done, but
(09:28):
being happy and where I am um with that and
still trying the new things even though it feels tiresome. Yeah,
and were triggering, Yeah, Yeah, I mean it's always like
big proponents of self care and taking care of ourselves.
(09:49):
But on a entertainment note, I'm really looking forward to
Spider Verse the sequel, thanks to everyone who sent me messages.
I'm looking forward to the last of as TV show obviously,
and all the Star Wars and Marvel stuff, So that's
that's exciting. We did want to quickly go over some
(10:11):
things we're watching out for as we go into one
of the big ones being an unfortunately abortion. Yes, we've
already talked at length. I guess the last year that
we can say that was happening, but we're still very
much keeping an eye out for what's going to happen
in the future because it also does affect the Bonds
(10:32):
Against Women's Act. I was just thinking about that recently,
UM and funding in general, and we already know conversations
about the High Amendment that's been had, the conversation about
the gag rule which has been appealed but still in
place for states, and we know all of that, but
definitely watching to see what the Supreme Court is gonna do.
Definitely watching to see if President Biden is going to
(10:53):
to uh expand the Supreme Court, what that looks like.
We're gonna see if the testimonies of Kavanaugh and co
and Barrett actually hold to their word saying that it
didn't need to be changed since it was already established.
But we know there's a lot of backtracking to that.
UM her insensitive conversations about adoption. I'm not gonna flye.
(11:17):
It triggered me. It triggered me a lot, and there's
a lot of bigger conversations I want to have about that,
but yeah, it's it's interesting to see. And we are
very cautious excited about the FDA ruling, cautious about what
that looks like when the Supreme Court does decide to
tackle the Mississippi law. Also very nervous about what's gonna
(11:37):
happen at state level because we know, again we talked
about it previously. We are we Annie and I are
in Georgia, which is a southern state, though you know
we all we did we were blue, essentially saying that
we as a state gave votes to Biden. So that
was delightful, but we already know things are changing. So yeah, nervous, yes, Well,
(11:59):
speaking of that, we have Stacy Abrams running for governor. Yes, yes, yes, yes,
I started her campaign and announced it as a governor
finn only enough. David Purdue is back as well, who
felt miserably in his Senate run, thank god, and I
(12:20):
say miserably in that he really didn't know what to
do with the Trumpian I guess tactics that weren't working
in Atlanta because the black women and women of color
in Georgia fought fiercely and victoriously to rally the people essentially,
(12:42):
no matter whatever big things. But well, we'll I'm interested
to see how he does it because I think he's
coming back as a trumpion essentially, and I say that
not condescendingly, but kind of doing the platform of promising
to bring Trump back. So that's his tactics. So it'll
be interesting to see what goes out essentially. But yeah,
(13:02):
I think we all, as a community of sminthy maybe
this is just too much of a generalization, are pretty
big fans of Stacey Amrams. Maybe it's just me. I
feel like it's not. Um So very excited to see
what happens. Hopefully we're gonna make a big turnaround. Also
coming up in a probably a few weeks, our friend
Melody is coming back with some exciting news. You've been
(13:25):
listening to us talking about voting in Georgia for the
last year. So excited. Yes, yes, so look after that,
also related, we are going to be watching what happens
with the Voting Rights Acts and all that stuff around
that and jerryman ring. Yeah, I mean, these are just
the things on on top of our mind right now.
There's a lot going on that we're gonna be talking
(13:46):
about and listeners. As always, we want to know what
you want to hear, what's on your mind, what should
we be discussing. Um You can email us at Stephidia
Mom stuff at I Heard media dot com. You can
find us on Twitter at Mom's podcast or on Instagram
and stuff I've never told you. Thanks. It's always to
our super producer Christina. Thank you, thank you and happy
(14:06):
in your years and thanks again for listening. Steph I
never told you. The substection of ihiar radio. For more
podcast my Heart Radio, visit the radio app, Apple Podcasts,
or wherever you listen to your favorite shows
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