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May 6, 2015 • 37 mins

Celebrities' post-childbirth weight loss has become a standard feature of tabloids. Cristen and Caroline examine our collective fixation on these new moms' bodies and how it skews non-celebrity perceptions on how women should expect to look after they're done expecting.

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Episode Transcript

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Speaker 1 (00:03):
Welcome to Stuff Mom Never Told You from how Supports
dot com. Hello, and welcome to the podcast. I'm Kristen
and I'm Caroline. And in part two of our Mother's
Day Week, we're talking about post pregnancy weight loss. In

(00:23):
our last episode, we talked about celebrity culture and baby
bump watches, and today we're talking about another growing aspect
of tabloid celebrity culture, which is the post pregnancy weight
loss watch. Yeah, this is yet another but related obsession

(00:44):
with monitoring women's bodies. Women we don't know in real life,
although as we'll talk about it certainly does bleed into
real life out of the pages of the tabloids. Um.
I mean, celebrity women themselves are sort of damned they do,
they're damned if they don't. If they gain too much
weight during pregnancy, they're out of control, they're sloppy. If

(01:05):
they don't gain enough weight, they're not taking care of
themselves and they're being selfish and not taking care of
their future children. But I think when overall, when we
when we have this discussion, we need to keep in
mind that generally the celebrities who we are judging have
enough money to hire professional chefs and trainers that allow

(01:28):
them to meet crazy expectations that women's bodies should look
a certain way in a certain period of time post pregnancy. Well,
and I think too that this whole post pregnancy weight
loss fascination obviously goes along with a tabloid and paparazzi
culture and that being more present than ever before via

(01:49):
celeb blogs and social media. And I think it also
is an extension of how we love a magical makeover.
We love before and after. So we now have so
many photo galleries on so many websites and also featured
in print of the female celebrity before she had the baby.

(02:12):
You know, at her at her largest point during pregnancy,
and then now look at her on the beach. You
can't even tell she had a baby. How did she
do it? I mean? But that's key though to this discussion,
whether it's about baby bumps or post pregnancy weight loss,
is almost erasing. Is this this pursuit of eracing any

(02:34):
evidence that a baby was had? And yes, I'm looking
at you, Victoria's Secret Angels. That's like a huge discussion.
It seems like every year when that Victoria's Secret fashion
show rolls around, some angel three hours ago popped out
a baby, and people are like, Oh, good for her,
Look at her. You can't even tell look at those abs.

(02:55):
Oh my god, where's the pooch? It doesn't exist. That
baby just sort of evaporated out of her wound and
came back together outside of it. And of course the
sub the subtext of that is and ladies, you can
do that too. Yeah, but I mean even celebrities are
sort of tisk tisking other celebrities. So there was an
in style photo gallery, one of three billion out there

(03:16):
on the internet that featured celebrities before and after pictures,
and one of the celebrities in the gallery was Rebecca
Remain when she was pregnant with her twins, and the
accompanying text UH talked about how she she got this
phone call from supermodel L the Body McPherson one day
and she says, L told me, listen, you have a

(03:37):
nice body. You should really take care of it. That
was the best advice I ever got until then. It
never occurred to me to work out. I have a
lot of questions regarding that. Um, but yeah, I was
as surprised to read that as you were, Caroline, because
I don't know if that was Rebecca remains subtle way
of throwing shade at El McPherson for calling her and

(03:58):
having the cajones to say that. Um. But the entire thing, though,
the entire tone of this in Style and so many
of these other galleries is applause for these women of
look at them. So it's just looking fantastic, just looking great.
She did pilates, she takes long walks around her California ranch,

(04:19):
the hikes. She only eats spinach. It's perfect. I mean.
And this also, I mean, the Kardashians are a controversial
family for us to even mention on this podcast. I
know that because when we posted a photo of Kim
Kardashian on our Facebook page, Heavens, the comments section was

(04:42):
a little disturbing. But they are important to talk about
in this conversation because, I mean, the focus on their
bodies pre and post childbirth has been horrendous. There was
one incident with Courtney card Ashian when Okay, Tabloid magazine

(05:03):
just photoshopped her body completely, erasing all of the weight
that she had gained, and she even came out and
said that he I haven't lost all that weight that
was a total photoshop job. Well yeah, because I think
they published that like five days after she'd given birth
to her baby, and so she's like, no, hello, no,
this magazine. I never spoke to this magazine. They never

(05:25):
took these pictures of me. They just totally in photoshop
shaved off part of my body. And of course I
just wonder if this is part of an effort. I wonder,
but I sort of know that this is an effort
to just get moms in line at the checkout counter
to be like, oh my god, she just had that
baby four hours ago and she's already lost the weight.
How did she do it? I'm going to buy this

(05:46):
magazine to find out. I mean, it's it's sort of
a cheap trick to try to do that. And then,
of course, say what you will about Kim Kardashian or
any of the Kardashians for that matter, but these women
do not deserve the body abuse that they've suffered, particularly Kim,
because the abuse that she suffered, I mean it was
this constant, never ending barrage of fat shaming both during

(06:10):
and after her pregnancy, to which I say, could you
people please lay off? She is a very short person.
And wait shows up very easily on really short people.
But again it's part of that whole applause factor. E
featured a story headlined Kim Kardashian Unhappy with post baby body,
with so many exclamation points, and it talks about how

(06:32):
the mom of one is determined to lose fifteen to
twenty pounds to get her pre baby body back. And
that's that's everything. All of those magazines out there were
talking about the crazy workouts to try to get your
body back. Well, think about that language, get your body back. No,
you didn't. You give birth to a baby, you didn't like,
your body didn't leave you. You're not somehow disconnected from

(06:54):
your body. I mean, I understand what that means. But
I'm just saying, when you pay attention to this language,
like we talked about in the baby Bump episode, how
the tabloid term showing off, showing off. Anytime a pregnant
woman exits her house, she's showing off. She's not just
going to the grocery store. And it's a similar kind
of thing. As soon as women have a baby, they're

(07:16):
immediately trying to get this runaway body back. You know,
we mentioned Kate Middleton in our in our first episode,
and she is no stranger to being on the receiving
end of all this body judgment. Um was she was
totally put under a microscope both during her pregnancy because
apparently her baby bump was too small by tabloid standards,

(07:37):
and then of course the post baby body policing she
faced for her post baby bump. And it actually, though hope,
you know, filled me with hope. She that actually faced
a bit of a backlash. It sort of was sparked
by this British news anchor who posted a picture of
herself two months after having a baby, and it's like, look,
this is what you look like after baby. You just

(07:58):
pushed out of human Just screw everybody else. Yeah. I
remember very clearly in her first publicity photos after having
Prince George, she's wearing this blue dress and you can
see the outline of her stomach and she still has
the bump. And I remember reading probably a post on

(08:20):
Jezebel or someplace like that saying thank God for this
photo of showing they're like, I'm so glad that she
came out in public while she still had this bump,
because everyone thinks that it just disappears. But no, your
bunner was. There was a human in there hanging out, burrowing,

(08:42):
and the burrow doesn't just magically go away. Also, I'm
not a doctor. Clearly I think you got you got
a little burrow. No, But I mean I think it's
crazy that that. I think you can argue that much
of our human population has either been pregnant or been
around a pregnant person and should logically know and understand

(09:02):
or at least have it makes sense in your brain
that that baby bump doesn't just go away magically. But
we somehow hold famous people to this expectation that they're
all going to look like a Victoria's Secret Angel after
they give birth, and it's just not reality. And this
is something that also came up more recently when a
Fox News anchor made a whole bunch of nasty comments

(09:25):
about the body of pop star and new mom Kelly Clarkson,
and people, thankfully we're super vocal in their displeasure with
how like gross and tacky he was, and he ended
up apologizing because I mean, at that point, you have
to You've been a jerk and now the whole world
is calling you on it. But still I mean, that
is just an example of the fact that everybody's looking,

(09:47):
everybody's judging, and they think they have a right to
for some reason. Well, this also prompts a deeper look
into this fixation that we clearly have on weight, babies
and and these women's bodies, because along with all of
these semi horrific before and after photo galleries on in

(10:08):
Style and other places, there are plenty of think pieces
as well trying to analyze our celebrity pregnancy weight obsession,
and honestly, they're probably warranted considering that level of shaming
that we've been talking about. And it's a similar theme
that comes up as our previous episode focusing on the

(10:28):
baby bump. Are we just uncomfortable with what pregnancy means?
Do we just want no evidence that these women had
sex whatsoever, but we want them to be sexualized. We
just don't want to think about them in the context
of sex for the sake of procreation, right, Yeah, I
think that has a lot to do with it, and
Katie Gentile, writing for Daily Based in January, wrote, it

(10:52):
is chilling to watch the culture become more and more
obsessed with babies, while the evidence of how these babies
are created, it is removed from public view. It's like, okay, well,
you can be a pre pregnancy hot sexual being. During
pregnancy you're allowed to have a very cute, well accessorized
baby bump in in modest, not too sexy clothes, and

(11:16):
then post pregnancy you need to get rid of any
uh flappy skin evidence that you ever created a human Well,
and you mentioned too, how having the celebrity pregnancies are
obvious tabloid fodder because it instantly provides at least nine
months worth of related news in quotes. And the postpartum

(11:39):
weight is part of that because now that the baby
has gone well, we can still talk about estimations of
how much weight did they gain? And it's interesting that
the weight almost becomes its own entity, like how much
money did they make last year? How much weight did
they gain? Well, it's in the same way of compartmentalized

(12:00):
thing these women into bumps, into weight, into they are
they're fully human beings anymore, They're just these parts of themselves. Yeah,
and then those parts are used to sell us diet
and fitness tips that at best are unrealistic and at
worst are unhealthy. And then we blame the regular women

(12:22):
around us on the street or in our lives for
failing if they can't achieve that post baby supermodel status.
And so there's this sort of equation that happens between
empowerment with weight control and making yourself smaller. It's that
whole getting your body back is supposed to be empowering.
And while yes, is exercising and eating right and and

(12:45):
feeling good about yourself empowering absolutely, but is forcing yourself
to go into overdrive to an unhealthy extent to make
yourself smaller when dude, you just created a human Well,
because it's not about health, it's about a thin ideal
as empowerment, and the this culture celebrates that so much.

(13:09):
This was something I was reminded of during this past
year's Golden Globes when Rosamund Pike start of Gone Girl,
arrived in this Alexander Way gown that had side cutouts,
and it wasn't shocking necessarily, but it was daring, every
single fashion person said, because she had had a baby

(13:32):
five weeks previous, and so they were saying, well, this
is a daring choice for a woman who has so
recently had a baby to make, because she's really putting
a lot of her body on this play. It's like
people are freaking out. It's like no, no, no, we
don't want you to let us into your lives like that,
like post nude when you're at your quote unquote normal

(13:52):
weight or normal body, or when you you have the
big bump and you can do it to me more style, right,
but like, oh, I don't want to accidentally maybe see
a stretch mark like that might be t m I
for me. So what is this cycle of pregnancy and
judgments and backlash? Repeat? What is that doing to us?
Not just celebrities, but how is that impacting just humans

(14:16):
with bodies walking around? Well? I really liked author Claire
Misco's post over at Fusion Talking. She leads off by
talking about that Fox News anchors comments about Kelly Clarkson's weight,
and she says that awful comments like this really end
up reinforcing our own negative feelings, and so I thought
her post was so on point and so depressing all

(14:38):
at the same time. She says the whole thing mimics
the internal dialogue that millions of smart, accomplished, bona fide
feminist women have with ourselves, and she talks about the
cycle of feeling bad because we don't think we're thin
enough or fit enough, and then we feel even worse
for getting caught up in that, you know, dumb internal dialogue.

(14:58):
We feel like we should be above that at and
beyond that. She says, the anchor's words, his unkind words themselves,
remind us all, even those who those of us who
feel like we're confident and we can rise above all
of that junk, they remind us that no matter how
hard we work, whether it's working on our outside or
working on our inside or both, there's a very real

(15:21):
cloud of appearance based judgment hanging over us. And she says,
it's not in our heads. People, not only this news anchor,
He's just one of a million people all over the
place are looking at your pregnant body or your post
pregnant body, or you're never been pregnant body, and hurling
judgments at all the time. And it's a terrible reminder
of that. Yeah. I mean, if we try to post

(15:43):
this as a chicken egg kind of thing, I don't
necessarily think that celebrity culture is to blame. I don't
think that that's the chicken that laid the egg. I
think that it's a reflection of our collective scrutiny, and
tabloid culture is capitalizing on that and absolutely fanning the
flames in quote unquote real life. And we're gonna talk

(16:06):
more about that in the experience of I r L moms,
moms not living in Hollywood and wearing Alexander Waite gowns
when we come right back from a quick break, now,
I should emphasize the Rosmund Pike and other other women

(16:26):
who have children who do wear Alexander wang gowns are
not not real moms, just me, you know, women who
aren't necessarily going to be in the spotlight of celebrity tabloids,
or women who don't have the money to pay chefs
and trainers every day. Yeah, and this was something that

(16:48):
Bethany Newmeyer was writing about in April over the Huffington's
post about how she faced a list of terrible comments
from people who work and learned about the health of
her fetus because she was apparently too thin in their eyes,
And she posted a photo of herself and yeah, I
mean she was literally like a you know, a rather

(17:10):
thin person with a basketball on the front of her.
But that's also how pregnancy goes for some bodies. Everybody
has a different body. But she pointed out that it's
not only that she was critiqued for being too thin.
Other people did tell her, God, you're so fat. I know,
I know, I can't win. You know you can't um
And a lot of this our perceptions about ourselves and

(17:32):
about other women is really tied up in our own
attitudes towards weight, fat, food, confidence, and beauty overall. And
this paper in Social Science and Medicine in February two
thousand looked at what affects weight management and weight concerns
during the so called motherhood transition, when you're going from

(17:53):
being pregnant to going to have the baby actually in
your arms, and they found that, not surprisingly, your pre
pregnancy attitudes towards your weight, towards really weight and body
fat in general ended up being the main influence on
their attitudes towards weight and physical activity and diet, and

(18:15):
on postpartum weight outcomes the most, and only a few
of those thirty six women interviewed in that study diverged
from their pre pregnancy attitudes towards weight, diet, and exercise.
And the Journal of Reproductive and Infant psychology took it
further in one study publish in two thousand five looking

(18:35):
at the effects of disordered eating habits, and this is
something that we've touched on before an earlier podcast, and
it found that moms with eating disorders were likelier than
the comparison group to view the external world as negative
and critical about what the study authors described as their
new maternal selves, which is kind of heartbreaking. And I

(18:59):
do know of women who definitely feel that level of
scrutiny and are very uncomfortable with the pregnancy weight gain
and want it just like it made them feel like
completely different humans. Yeah, exactly, and when when they compared
the moms who had disordered eat eating habits to moms

(19:21):
in the comparison group, those moms seemed quote better able
to prioritize and tolerate their baby's dependency on their bodies,
and they discussed breastfeeding in relation to the needs of
their child rather than their own needs. Unlike circling back
to tabloids, basically every story about a new mom that's
ever been written which frames breastfeeding is like a quick

(19:44):
fix to lose weight. Oh yeah, if you read any
of those stories about well, how did she get back
to that pre baby body which apparently went on vacations.
I don't know, Chicabo and all of them always say, well,
eye breastfed. So I just dropped the weight. And it's like, yeah,
and we'll we'll touch on we'll we'll get into you
know what realistic expectations for weight loss are, and we

(20:05):
will touch on breastfeeding. But you just can't look at
it as a magic fix like that you have to
be able to take care of yourself and your new baby. Well,
it's just unhealthy to promote breastfeeding, not as oh, this
is a choice that you can have, this is how
it may or may not impact your health, your baby's health,
but rather as a weight loss tip that seems not
so healthy. And now we're going to mention the old panopticon,

(20:30):
Jeremy Bentham's famed panopticon that we discussed in our episode
on slut shaming. And the panopticon is this idea that
we are constantly being surveiled not only by everyone around us,
but also too by ourselves. Yeah, and this is definitely

(20:51):
a relevant philosophy when it comes not only to weight
and body image, but to pregnancy too. And this is
coming from a chapter in the book Weighty Issues, Fatness
and Thinness of Social Problems by John Germov and Lauren Williams.
And they're really talking about dieting and weight overall in
general as it pertains to women and women's body image specifically.

(21:13):
But I think so much of it ties so easily
into this discussion about post pregnancy weight. So they start
off by talking about dieting being a primarily female act.
It's something normal that women are expected to do. They're
expected to limit food intake and to be dissatisfied with
their bodies. And so they ask, like, who's normalizing this,
and they say that, you know, it's the media, it's fashion,

(21:35):
it's the fitness industries. And they point out that there's
this discourse surrounding the beauty myth and the thin ideal
um that at first glance is sort of evidence of
this level of patriarchal oppression over women. But the authors say,
we think there's a little bit more to it than that. Yeah,
as they start to peel this onion, there's this layer

(21:58):
of women's excess being measured by appearance, and they write
it's probably not by accident that women's appearance norms have
intensified with the political and economic gains made by women
in advanced industrialized societies. And it was really fascinating how
they noted that, particularly for say, quote unquote first wave

(22:22):
feminism in the early twentieth century, late nineteenth century, Uh,
women's suffrage was very much aligned with health, physical health
and exercise and those kinds of regimens because they saw
that as sort of part of our liberation. And there

(22:44):
is still jumped to today, there is still this I
don't know, there's still lots of body politics obviously embedded
in these conversations we have about feminism. Yeah, and so
you know, they've talked about body image, body expectation, especially
as women advanced through through an in society. But the
people profiting off of this thin ideal in in our

(23:07):
case today, we're talking about tabloids and gossip blogs profiting
not to mention fashion and fitness industries, but to do this,
you standardize a thin ideal of beauty that the majority
of women can never attain, they right, but you make
it look so appealing that they actually seek it out.
And in in this case, that goes back to that
photoshop to cover image of Courtney Kardashians, so that if

(23:30):
you're that harried mom and the checkout line, you might
want to pick up that magazine to get those elusive
answers like, oh, maybe it is easy for some people
to just drop this weight. Oh I will almost always
if there's a grocery store line, I will pick up
and US Weekly and look at it. If I go
on a long trip. That is my guilty pleasure look

(23:50):
at those tabloids because they are so I mean, And
even with all the pregnancy body stuff and even being
a feminist and being totally aware of what's going on
in these magazines, I still look at them absolutely. And
it's all part of what Jermov and Williams talk about
in this chapter about women policing other women as well.

(24:12):
It's not just you know, the male gaze that is
at fault here. Yeah. They call it being the bearers
of our own surveillance. Yeah. And they found that for
many women, being critical of other women's bodies served to
boost their own self esteem. Like one woman they quoted
who said, it makes you feel better if she's got

(24:34):
something wrong. It makes you realize she's not perfect. And
I'm just wondering, is that why we love the before
and after baby pictures so much, like, look at her,
she gained a bunch of weight. She's not perfect or
she hasn't lost it all yet, she's not perfect. Into that,
I say, let's all just acknowledge straight up that nobody's perfect.
Let's not have to tie that into trying to tear

(24:55):
someone down to make the realization. Well, and then we
get into this so called cult of thinness, possibly creating
a gateway toward cosmetic surgery as well. Um, there's an
analysis which found that plastic surgery can, beyond signifying oppression quote,
enable some women to alleviate the unbearable suffering and reappropriate

(25:19):
formerly hated bodies. And this was something that post baby
Gwyneth Paltrow actually discussed um, saying that she was open
to the idea of a post breastfeeding breast lift. Yeah.
And I mean when I tried to google, because I
tried to look for the actual quote that she made
in the magazine about being open to it or having

(25:40):
done it or thinking about doing it, and I couldn't
even I couldn't even wade through all of the gossip
blogs that were just talking about did she didn't she
look at these pictures to her boobs look the same
as they did back when she was like sixteen. I
don't think so, and it's like, ah, please, let's drop it.
So like I couldn't. I couldn't even find the actual

(26:01):
article where someone actually interviewed her and got a quote,
because it was just full of nothing but trash blogs
posting pictures of her body and commenting. It's like we
secretly hope it's true or not so secretly, so that
we can have something else, especially for Gwyneth Paltrow, we
can have something, something else to poke at. But let's
get real. Let's step away from the tabloid aisle, and

(26:25):
let's get real in terms of bodies post pregnancy. And
this is coming not from US Weekly, but thankfully from
the National Library of Medicine's Medline Plus. Okay, so we
have some facts, not before and after photos, some actual facts. Yeah.
And so they emphasize setting appropriate expectations, don't get ahead

(26:47):
of yourself when it comes to losing weight. You have
to be kind to yourself. And I think that's true
of every aspect in life, including your post baby life.
So they lay out sort of a weight expectations timeline
that you should plan to hit your you pregnancy weight
or thereabouts about six months post delivery. And they point
out that on average, women lose half their baby weight

(27:08):
so to speak, by six weeks post baby, while the
rest of it comes off gradually over the next several months.
And they also point out hopefully, which I was like, huh, yeah,
good point, you'll basically lose ten or so pounds or
right out of the gate thanks to just birthen your child.
So so there's ten pounds right off the top. And

(27:30):
they emphasize, as do several other sources, that you should
aim for a weight loss of about one and a
half pounds a week without dropping below your minimum calories
for the day. But do not exert any effort to
shed weight too quickly. Give yourself, they say, until you're
six weeks check up before you actually try to lose weight.

(27:54):
If you're breastfeeding, wait until your baby is at least
two months old to give it a go. And why
because your body needs to recover. It's just done this
pretty incredible thing that also was pretty tough on your body,
and losing too much weight too fast can hamper the process.
And also if you are breastfeeding, it could diminish your

(28:14):
milk production. And speaking of breastfeeding, like we mentioned earlier,
be careful treating it like some kind of miracle weight
loss solution, because yes, it burns calories, but that also
means that you need to make those calories up, because
a breastfed baby needs up to eight hundred fifty calories
a day. Oh, that's so cute to sift. It's adorable.

(28:35):
It's not like they're doing a lot of workout. I
know it's true, And those eight hundred fifty calories come
from you. That's right, not me. But you can not know,
not me, you're not you're not taking any of my calories.
All right, step off. But you also have to face
this new reality because you've got to get out of
your mind the celebrity magazine jargon of getting your body back,

(28:58):
because the thing is a like christ and said, it
didn't go anywhere. It's just that it's changed. After you
have a baby, you might forever have a slightly softer tummy,
you might have stretch marks on a larger waistline. This
isn't fodder for you to hate yourself or resent yourself
or feel guilty about not looking a certain way that

(29:18):
you did beforehand. This is the body that you know
carried a baby and it took. It took some some
abuse at that baby's expense, including the physical stuff that
goes into creating that post baby pooch. It is not fat,
just in case you're wondering. It's caused by the separation
of the outermost abdominal muscles, which in turn causes the

(29:42):
connective tissue to stretch sideways and get thinner, and that week,
all connective tissue is holding up organs instead of stoming muscles.
So please be gentle with yourself. As someone who's never
carried a child, I ask you all to please be
gentle with yourselves. And that goes for exercise as well
as sex. Be gentle, let your body heal as you

(30:02):
do that. And at one point while we were researching Caroline,
I was tempted to start poking around for well, what
is the average amount of weight someone gains while pregnant?
And I stopped myself because the answer is it doesn't
really matter because everybody is different. Every Body is different,
and we tend to forget that, and we tend to
forget that, Oh, people lose weight at different rates. People

(30:25):
have different kinds of pre and post pregnancy diets. Some
people might have had a c section versus a vaginal delivery,
and that's going to impact your recovery as well. So
instead of seeing it as a weight lost journey, as
we were so often primed to do, maybe we should
think about it more in terms of just the recovery period. Yeah,

(30:47):
well yeah, And I mean we need to definitely hear
from moms who've been through it and and how long
it took them to recover, you know, if at all,
did you just jump back into work and things like
that or did you take your time? And some moms
that we can turn to are circling back to those
celebrity moms. I think people like Kristen Bell and Olivia

(31:08):
Wilde have some good perspective, including even Jennifer Love Hewitt,
who has been a victim of a whole lot of
celebrity magazine taunting over the years. For instance, Hewett says,
you have to eat to feed your baby. She says,
you know, body sho's get you down. Sometimes I'm not
going to lie. I've had days where I'm like, Okay,
I wish this was easier, but it's not and that's okay.

(31:33):
And Kristin Bell points out, Yeah, change is hard no
matter what it is, especially when it's weight gained. But
you know, it's easy to focus on the negatives and
completely disregard the fact that you're making another human. You're
participating in the most beautiful cycle that this earth will allow.
Who cares if you put on weight for a while.
And Olivia Wilde said, I don't want to waste my
time striving for some subjective definition of perfection in regard

(31:58):
to this drive to erase all what she calls physical
evidence of the child bearing experience. So, I mean, it's
it's great that you know, in a culture that also
celebrates and uplifts celebrities to the level of being role models,
that there are some celebrity mom role models out there
who are keeping it real and would like us to

(32:19):
maybe keep it more real as well. So I definitely
want to hear from some people who have experienced this
as well, or even been close observers partners of people
who have been pregnant. We want to hear from you
as well. Mom Stuff at how stuff works dot Com
is our email address. You can also tweet us at
mom stuff podcast or messages on Facebook. And we've got

(32:43):
a couple of messages to share with you when we
come right back from a quick break. Well, I have
a letter here from tell Us about our episode on
social justice. She says, I, for one, do believe the
internet based activism is vital, especially now with so many
causes to follow and with most of the world being
connected to the web. As someone who actively participates in

(33:06):
Black Lives Matter activism and actions in New York, Twitter
was imperative. I used it to find locations of actions,
follow updates from when people took to the streets. As
the group marches, someone is usually tweeting the cross streets,
and to boost reliable sources and people. The use of
Twitter and Facebook is also useful with the education based
activism that I'm involved in, which is based on abolishing

(33:29):
the education crisis that is a result of institutionalized racism,
the school to prison pipeline and the defunding of our
public schools no thanks to Governor Cuoma, we have a
lot of work to do. And finally, as a person
who is also active in non GMO anti mon Santo,
anti big organic activism, social media is also useful to

(33:49):
stay on top of legislation, brand buyouts, and brands to
support or boost. As these are my main campaigns that
I personally work on in person and around on the web.
I could never deal agitimize those who were unable to
get to the streets themselves. On the topic of political correctness,
I do think it's gotten to a level of ridiculousness,
but I continue to express my feelings as I'm allowed

(34:11):
to by being an American. I myself just always probe
and question people about their opinions when I think they're
being closed minded or passing microaggressions because some people honestly
don't know because of their lifestyle. As a young, impoverished, feminist,
bisexual woman of Irish and Caribbean descent, I have a
lot under my belt to ask people to check their
privilege about. But again, there's a fine line. So thanks

(34:34):
alas well. I gotta let her here from Jessica about
our science fiction and social justice episode, and she writes,
I'm an English teacher and wrote my master's thesis on
feminist dysk topic fiction, exploring futures where women's body's, sexuality
and reproduction were the subject, if not the foundation of
an authoritarian government's control. The Handmaid's Tale was mentioned in

(34:56):
your episode and was the key stone piece of my thesis.
More than that, though, the book completely changed my life.
I was in the Navy when I first read it,
and in my early twenties trying to figure out what
to do after my four years was up. A friend
lent me the book, and after reading it, I knew
I wanted to talk about it, think about it, write
about books for a living. I wanted people to be

(35:17):
as inspired by literature as I was. That ended up
leading me to teaching, which is a profession I truly love.
I use science fiction and fantasy, as well as graphic
novels in my classes all the time. One of the
most delightful things I've seen in some of my younger
students is that through y a dystopic fiction, they're more
aware of who they are and what they want to
be now and as adults, these novels give them away

(35:39):
to have a voice and an opinion on subjects of race, gender, class,
environmental protections, and governance which may seem otherwise too far removed.
Reading about the possibility for change through the lens of
disaster can really motivate an invested reader to action, and
that to me is why the dystopias are so fascinating.
They aren't just about the disaster, they're about overcoming it.

(36:01):
This is such a great topic and I would love
to see you do your summer reading episode on science fiction.
A few suggestions from a specifically feminist perspective I would
add would be a Woman on the Edge of Time
by Marge Piercy and Walk to the End of the
World by Susie McKee Sharnas. Thanks so much for your
great show, and thanks for teaching Jessica, and also for

(36:24):
your great suggestions. And I gotta tell you listeners, we
have been getting lots of request for us to do
our summer reading episode on science fiction, so have your
voices be known. Let us know and if you have
suggestions for books or authors in that genre you want
us to talk about, please email us Mom Stuff at
how Stuffwork dot com is the address and blink so
all of our social media as well as all of

(36:46):
our blogs, videos and podcasts, including this one with our sources.
So you can read more about the post pregnancy weight
lost madness around us. Head on over to Stuff Mom
Never Told You dot com. For more on this and
thousands of other topics, visit how staff works dot com.

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