December 20, 2019 • 32 mins
Ron and Carolina take a bittersweet trip down memory lane with some of their favorite moments from Season 2.
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Speaker 1 (00:04):
Romberg Podcast. Hello everyone, this is Ron Burgundy and boy
do we have a treat for you. I'm, of course
joined by Carolina. Carolina, how are you today? I'm good.
I'm good. I love your sun dress. Thank you. It's
(00:24):
um it's very sunflowery, Yes it is. Did you do
the embroidery yourself? No, I bought it at a store.
Why why? I think it's actually a high level of craftsmanship.
I'm being serious. I know, I'm just suspicious. No, you
shouldn't be. Um. We are so excited that you're listening.
(00:45):
I mean, we're always excited that you're listening. We can't
believe that you're listening. We are still in disbelief. But
today today's show is really special. It is. It is
basically a best of season two special episode featuring favorite
moments from throughout the season, and we've cultivated uh, what
(01:05):
would you say, We've curated a fabulous panache? Is pinach?
Pinash is also a food? Right? Yes, it's you. I'm
thinking of a grenache. Oh, anyway, this is a This
is a collection of real special gems from throughout season two.
We've thrown them all in the little goodie bag here.
(01:26):
Ron really wanted to do a blooper reel. I did, because,
let's face it, whenever I go to a major motion picture,
I usually show up at the last fifteen minutes to
watch the blooper reel with the crowds. Oh god. I mean,
the thing is that we didn't have that many bloopers,
so you were I could see that you're trying to
plant someone. I wanted something in that same family. You
(01:48):
pushed me off that chair, yeah, and little things like that.
So um So, anyway, we've cobbled some things together and
this is a this is the showing of that work.
Um Now, I know that Carolina. You know, throughout both
our seasons, you've you've done a lot of fact checking
on the show, and we've received tons of letters that
(02:12):
it's subpar, subpar um And that's not me trying to
be catty. That's just a statement effect. But here's the
good news. The cavalry road into town to save Carolina's
sweet booty. Uh, we've got a system now that's even better.
Listen to this. Hey, Google, what's the capital of California? Wait?
(02:40):
Did you really not know that? You know? The point
is Google did? Okay, So what if I didn't. Huh
what if you didn't. We now have a fool proof
fact check system with Google Assistant. That's what we need
to focus on. Okay, no quid pro quo here, Yes
maybe we Okay, get back into the Best of Please
(03:03):
enjoy this Best of season two. Ron Bergundy Podcast Today.
Does that sound right? Today? That reading of today? Yeah,
it's exactly how it's pronounce Today, we are interviewing a
woman who is very important. She's a very very smart woman.
(03:24):
She's um, this episode is on. I'm going to own up.
I forgot who were interviewing today? Are you serious? I
have a feeling it's not Ruth Bader Ginsburg. You tried her, right, Caroline?
Did you try her? We tried with Peter Ginsberg. But
her business manager said, um, this is weird. She said
(03:46):
you two had a falling out. I was I was confused.
She said you two were no longer on speaking terms.
You heard that right? For two whole years. If you
if you came to the Saddle Creek Diner on a
Monday morning, you'd see me and baby Ruth in a
corner eating breakfast and talking shop. You're talking shop. You
wouldn't understand it. Carolina. Okay, it's lost stuff, all right?
(04:08):
Did you understand it? Not really? But I let her talk,
and boy can she talk. She can talk you through
the Saddle Creek's Lumberjack special for sausage links and to
pancake piles. Later, she's still going on. And I'm sorry
to ask you, but why did you guys stop hanging out? Um?
I would say, scheduling conflicts. Well, I mean after we
(04:31):
had a huge fight, she said that she couldn't see
me anymore. So that was our scheduling conflict. Oh got it?
So yeah, if I saw today, I feel like bygones
would be bygones. So exactly how did you guys leave it?
Word for word? Well, if memory serves, she said something like,
if you start a food fight in this diner, I
(04:52):
will never speak to you again. And you started a
food fighting the diner. Yes we did, or I did?
Who can remember the specifics anymore. It's it's hard to
have a food fight when you're the only one throwing food.
You know, it feels like you're the apple in that situation.
But to get people to join, you have to just
(05:13):
throw more food. I mean omelets, jellos, a cup full
of eyes. I mean, nothing was getting this crowd going.
How old do you think most of the how old
were the most of the people in the dining Oh,
I mean everyone was in there early to late seventies
except for one grand kid. Yeah, so that's probably not
the best participants for our food fight, you know what
I mean. Ruth knows that I'm here if she every
(05:34):
wants to rekindle our friendship. I'm available for breakfast literally
every morning. Well, actually we record the podcast in the morning.
Any morning works. There is literally nothing going on in
my life right now that I would prioritize over breakfast. So, uh,
I just want to let that lie. Yeah, I'm out there.
(05:57):
Here we are with a real life brainy in the studio,
doctor Millstein, the brain scientist. He knows what's inside your brain.
Pretty crazy stuff. Let me ask you this question. I
know there's a lot of information on the amount of
sleep we get, right, So why do I need fourteen
hours of sleep every night? Is that? Do you get
(06:19):
fourteen hours of sleep at least at least that's a
lot of sleep. That's uh, you might want to would
you say that's a borderline too much? I would that
would be a concern. Oh, I thought I was doing great.
Yet you always say I need to make sure I
get my fourteen and I'll say I nailed it last night.
I got sixteen and a half. So that's not that's
not the way to go, right. So sleep is definitely
(06:40):
very important for the brain, but we're looking at more
the right amount as opposed to too much or too little,
So fourteen would be you want to check in with
your personal doctor. So during sleep, what does the brain do.
It's recharging, regenerating, just literally resting. So it's it's actually amazing.
What we've learned is that it's not just resting, it's
actually going through almost like a program, a sequence. And
(07:02):
so one thing that's amazing is that when you're asleep,
your brain actually shrinks down to about six of its
current size and squeezes out of the brain cells trash, toxins,
and waste, and it squeezes all that out into that
empty space. And then where does that go? So then
fluid comes up from your spinal cord and washes your brain,
so every night you have a brainwash. So that's why
(07:24):
it's so important to sleep. And then that waste in trash.
This is true I can show you a picture. This
is yeah, this is this is cutting edge, just getting
into the medical textbooks. So the brain shrinks, shrinks down
down to it. It sounds like a horror movie, but
it's real. Is there any chance that when the brain
expands back that it would go it would start to
(07:47):
explode out of your head. Uh, that's not a concern. No,
But but it's a it's a dynamic process. It's pulse
eights and it squeezes out all that trash and toxins
and waste out of curiosity. What if you have a
final cord injury? Would that affect the process? That's a
great question. So that is a concern, is that anyone
who has a spinal cord. Why was her question so
(08:07):
great and mine wasn't so great? I should have said
that you had that was a great question to go ahead?
Both great. Yeah. Um, the concern can be that if
that fluid is not making its way to the brain,
that the washing might not be as as effective, and
so you could keep toxins inside your body. So what
we're learning is is that even things like dementia, which
(08:27):
is very complex, or someone losing their memory. That's why
sleep is so important is because that build up of
toxins and trash, we need to wash it out every
night while we're sleeping. God, is this why there's a
new trend to drink your own spinal cord fluid. I
haven't heard that. I think that would not be a
good idea, because I could have sworn that's you know
a lot of professional athletes are now drinking their own
spinal cord fluid. Yeah, I haven't heard that, but that
(08:51):
it would not be a good idea, Okay, And so
during sleep time, what is the average man's risk for
being incepted? Incepted meaning like the movie Inception Inception. I
actually haven't seen that movie. So you mean you mean
someone sneaking into your brain and planting like bad ideas
inside your head A lot of times when Ron makes
(09:14):
a mistake, he says, oh, I was incepted, right right.
The statistics on that I'm not aware of. I would
say they're extremely low to zero. But I would say that, well,
what we can learn while we're sleeping is pretty interesting
because Inception is based on a true story. So I
don't know if it's said that, but i'd like doctor,
(09:34):
I'd like you to tell that to Chris Nolan. Uh,
one area though, the is you can there's some interesting
research you might be able to learn while you're sleep.
Maybe a word here that you might process it yea
like a foreign language or so that that's CPR foreign language.
I wish that was true. But it seems like maybe
you could learn a word here and then it would
be fun to take CPR and a foreign language, because
(09:56):
then you'd kill two birds with one stone. That's a
good idea. I popped it on your list. So you're
having a dream. Let's say you die in your dream.
Does that kill you like in Freddy Krueger's Nightmare on
Elm Street. No, that does not. That does not kill you. No,
if you die in your dream, yes, so yeah, your
dreams are not not based on what happens in your
(10:17):
and what's going to happen to you in your day
to day. That is a relief. That is an absolute relief. Um.
The other day I forgot to have my cup of
morning Joe, right, and wouldn't you know it, I punched
a hole through this wall. Uh, what what the heck
is that about not getting that morning caffeine? Yes, well,
(10:41):
caffeine is something that is very helpful in you know,
it wakes you up. People can help them with their mood.
So it's possible that if you had a bit of
a mood, SWEE had a bit of a mood swing
about your your morning morning coffee there, because I'm getting
fourteen hours of sleep and it takes me, what would
you say, another three hours it out of my groggy state. Yeah.
(11:01):
I don't usually understand what you're talking about until three
cups of coffee. Yes, but you've said some really sweet things,
and then after coffee you say, I become a normal
rational heat exactly. We are joined right now by our
cyber security expert, UH, Richard Greenberg. Richard, thank you for
(11:24):
for joining us here on the podcast on the weekends. Richard,
I like to mess around with my CB equipment. Um,
you know, I have one in my truck, uh, and
I just drive around for hours talking to my pals.
I've got the Muskrat, Howler, dan Zoid, Gruving, Gary, all
good buddies in my convoy. And if if you're ever
(11:46):
out on the road, my handle is frog Penis. Uh.
That's a long it's a long, funny story. I don't
have time to get into anyway. Is my CB radio
safe from hackers? CB is open so anybody can get on,
but there's not a whole lot you can do with
it unless it's connected to one of your networks internally,
which is most likely not the case. Some people have
(12:08):
actually done that, but I've seen your truck or your vehicle.
Then it's contained Roger that. Yeah, I'll tell you, Richard,
sometimes I can be a real ratchet, real ratchet John there.
I'll be talking to claw Humper, buzz Ball and Dr
Nathaniel Fernald doing double nickels on the dimes, saying, hey, muskrat,
what's your twenty next thing? You know, I got some
(12:29):
mama bear on my donkey. Okay, this is a cyber
security expert. He doesn't work with CB radios. And I've
told you before not everyone understands CBE radio lingo. Come on,
CAROLINEA quit acting like a lot lizard. Okay. You told
me that a lot lizard is CB radio lingle for prostitute,
and it is absolutely not okay to call me that.
It also doesn't make any sense in this context. Ten four.
That was out of line. I apologize, Richard gets it though.
(12:53):
Ten four ten four. See I'm just glad internet hackers
can't mess with my CB radio. That's that's a release. Yeah,
but that is an open line of communication absolutely, so
watch what you say or not. Yeah. Joining us here
in studio is Liz or childcare expert Liz. Thank you
for coming on the podcast today. Liz, what's a trick
(13:16):
or um on terms of how to talk to children
that more you see most people do wrong? Is that
too broad up a question? Oh no, that's pretty top
of mind for me. Um. So adults parents are blowing
it constantly. There are two things that when I see
parents doing that I know is really well meaning. I
get really excited about how to gently adjust them out
(13:38):
of the habits. And the first is when parents say
use your words when their child is having a tantrum
or struggling. The parent is trying to say, hey, we
can talk this out. I'm here, I can listen to you.
But what they're actually saying is, you know that hardest
thing for you to do, the most difficult way that
you have to communicate, Use that right now while you're
(14:01):
in a panic and you're crying and you're struggling. Um. So,
instead of saying use your words, I'll advise parents to
offer their kids what they know their kids are trying
to say in that moment. This is helping me so
much because Ron was having a tantrum earlier today and
I did, I was, I was, I said your words,
(14:21):
and he was having it was there was he was
trying to formulate the words, but they weren't coming. Now,
I see that was me. Let's walk through that. Let's
do a do over on Ron's tantrum and walk through
what maybe you could do the next time to help
you guys stay connected in that really hard moment. Is
that okay? Okay? Yeah, sure. So Ron's crying R I'm
(14:46):
just gonna let him go. So what I would say
right there, Ron, I see you looking for your bag
of the kibble, and you seem really frustrated that you
can't find it. Would you like some help so we
can look for your killed together? It's good. Yeah, Ron,
(15:06):
I still see that you're looking at your kibl I'd
like to help you, but it's up on a high
shelf for you. M hm. Partying is embarrassing by your face. Sorry,
that is sort of usually where it ends. I usually
lash out and I always apologize. My rule is seven days.
(15:32):
I have to apologize within seven days, and I wait,
I waited out and sometimes it doesn't come, but sometimes
it does, and sometimes it comes at the eleventh hour,
end of day six, exactly the day we are going
to do some audience participation. That's right now. I see
that some of you have written to us on the
(15:53):
internet asking for advice from your good old pal Ron. Yeah.
We actually have quite a lot of questions to get
through today. Okay, Well, everyone comes to me for advice,
love advice, fashion advice, raccoon advice. You name it, so
I'm kind of used to it. Um, what what's raccoon advice? Oh?
You know, I give advice on how to get them
(16:15):
into your house and domesticate them. Great at Jared Stephen
rode In. He says, me and my girlfriend are in
the middle of a fight. What's something I can say
that will end the dispute? Calmly m hmmm. Well, I'm
glad you asked this, Jared. You know, I love stopping
a fight. I in fact, I always wanted to be
(16:38):
one of those security guys on the you know Jerry
Springer show, Carolina, you know who jumps in when the
is hitting the fan. And just pulls the brawl apart. Yeah. So,
you know, sometimes I break up a fight before it
even happens. I'll just walk into crowded bars and I'll yell, hey,
cool it. Oh wow. I mean I guess that could
(17:00):
resolve a dispute that's about to start. Okay, but this
guy is just asking how to end an argument with
his significant other, right again, great question. Listen, if you
want your partner to remain calm, you have to remain calm.
It takes two to tango. You know what. That's actually,
that's that's good advice. I completely agree. Yeah, no, it's
(17:23):
pretty simple, simple blueprint. I mean, you should just calmly
say to your girlfriend in almost a whisper, listen, honey,
you're being crazy. Okay, you're losing your marbles. If you
keep backs in this way, you're gonna land yourself in
the cuckoo's nest. No, absolutely not run. You cannot call
(17:45):
women crazy? Well, then how should we tell them to
calm down? No, you should never tell a woman to
calm down? Well, then how will I let them know
when they're being hysteria? Avoid all of these words, all
of these sentences. M h geez, you know. It's just
it's so much easier dealing with raccoons than it is
dealing with people. Don't you agree? No, No, this is
(18:12):
Ron Burgundy. You're listening to, of course, a special episode
best of season two. Um. Some great memories here, great memories,
even though I gotta say there's a bit of a
bummer that we had to drive all the way in
here to record these intros and outros. Well, you had
me canceled to vacations and they were both on the
(18:33):
wrong dates. What are you gonna do? What are you
gonna do? This business is a fickle mistress, I guess.
I mean, we could have planned it out better. Yeah, well,
that's why I don't take any vacations ever. I'm on call,
ready to go. Literally told me that you're out of
the country. Last night, when I told you we had
(18:56):
this tomorrow, you said, I can't amount of the country.
I know, I was hoping you would. I was hoping
you would take the bait and cancel it reschedule, But no,
I wasn't. I was lying. Yeah, I see that now. Well, regardless,
we're here right. We had mentioned this before. We have
(19:17):
a new piece of technology in the studio, The Google
Home device, which you implied was a better employee. No,
I didn't imply I said it. Okay, well I have
been coming around to it, you know. No, it's not
a human that works from eight am to eight thirty
pm and was called with no lunch breaks, no lunch breaks,
(19:41):
and on Christmas you called me saying you had a
bad dream, and then on my way there you said
you were at Panda Express. But look, this could be
more helpful to us because watch, hey, Google, what are
some nearby restaurants. I found a few restaurants near you.
It actually is super helpful. Can do anything. It can
(20:02):
show you where the closest Panda expresses and then you
won't have to call me. I still might call you, though,
just for backup. I don't think Google needs backup. I
think it's it's got you. You know. It's interesting because
sometimes they have celebrities do the voice for it. That's
so cool. Yeah, and I don't know if I told
(20:23):
you this, but I was up for the voice of
that thing, and I would have crushed it. Yeah maybe,
but no, I lost out to get this. Guess who
I lost it to. You're gonna believe this. It's a
total I roll John Legend him, but he's a tough competition.
(20:44):
You think I don't know that. I mean, the man
has a voice of an angel and a wife with
a social media presence that's nothing less than delightful. But
let me ask you, does John Legend have any experience
as a newscaster? Does he not that I'm aware of?
Does Google? Thing is supposed to give you information and
news and play music? Right? I mean, the last time
(21:05):
I checked, that's the job of a broadcaster. I'm a broadcaster,
not some guy with oscars and Grammys and a beautiful
genius wife who has great personality and just totally nails
it on social media. I mean, doesn't John Legend have enough?
He's very talented and nice, Nice Carolina. Let me show
you I can do this. Ask me a question like
(21:28):
I was Google. Okay, um, hey, Ron, what's the closest
yoga studio? You have several options? I've sat that you're
on your phone? Also, do you really think yo guys? Enough? Okay?
That's in? Is that like a golemn invitation? I have
(21:51):
no idea. I made a choice during the audition, and
I I totally blew it. It is weird, right, it's yes,
strong but wrong against John Legend. I don't think I
didn't even have a chance. It's unsettling. Um, we should
move on. Actually, yes, let's uh well, let's get back
(22:13):
here with more of best of Season two special episode
and we are back with the Ron Burgundy Podcast. Today
we have Roni Ganosh in the house. Los Angeles magazine
calls her the star Somali A. I call her RONI, Yes,
(22:38):
what do you What do you think of a nice Burgundy?
And I'm not just talking about the wine. Let's just
put the chateau away for a little bit while you
sober up. I think that we have to get through
the inter you know, I feel like we barely got
to talk about I love Lucy. Are you a Lucy
or an Ethel? Because I'm a Samantha and Caroline it
(23:00):
as a Miranda. No, I'm not. That's you're mixing up shows.
I'm and for the record, I'm Charlotte. Which question should
I answer? Lucy or Ethel? You know the chocolate machine, right,
the conveyor belt, all the chocolates. When we're getting a
little often, I wish there's no right or wrong answer.
(23:21):
Maybe a Lucy. I'd like to be a lucy Oh wow,
well it looks like are you okay? Are you? Are
you going to take a little nap? Do you do
you guys ever wonder what any of it all means? Okay, no,
I think why don't you get your head off the table.
You're gonna fall out of your chair. Just sit back.
(23:43):
Do you guys have any more Yeah, yeah, no, we do,
we do. We definitely have a few more questions. Okay, hey, hey, hey,
come on, come on, you got it. Just Ronni didn't
see that, did she. No, you're a good run. Don't worry.
You got it? Oh yeah, ship shape? All right? Where
(24:08):
are my notes? Yeah, they're right in front of you.
Sometimes I just sit on the floor of my shower
and I just think, wow, who turned off the dance music?
There wasn't any dance music playing. I don't know. I
want to put on the new song by Degrees. They
aren't abandoned anymore. That's not true. That's not true. You
(24:32):
just don't listen to their music anymore. You know what,
Let's get back to viticulture vida who yeah, um, RONI yes, run.
Here's the thing. We only got so much time on
this big blue marble, and I mean, it just keeps
(24:56):
spinning and spinning and spinning. What's your question? I'm gonna
get to it. Four eyes. Sorry, why did I say that?
Because I'm glasses all right, I don't I like your glasses.
I apologize. That was uncalled for. It's okay, you don't
think at emotional. They just discovered a black hole, you know,
(25:22):
that was cool. Yeah, but we're all we're all heading
for that black hole. That's the thing and I can't
stop thinking about. All right, Yeah, you might see a
nap or so. Anyway, you're my best friend. Whom Who
am I looking at? I could be looking at Carolina.
(25:45):
You're both my best you're you're both my best friends. Ronnie,
you're my new best friend, and you're a little I
get get a good feeling about you. So I'll put
you number one best friend, Carolina number two. Thank you?
But um woy okay, cool, Oh it's been a long
(26:09):
day for you. Come on, ah gosh, if you want
to read some advertisements, let's get to some mad copy. Ronnie,
(26:29):
do you have time to stay? I think she has
to go because she was just here for the interview. Okay,
I just wonder if you walk at that door, Ronny. Sorry,
I gotta go. I will never speak to you again.
I'm so sorry. I will never speak to you. Wow.
Well it's been really nice. Oh you're doing it. Yeah,
I gotta go. Okay, but I'll see you around. Yeah,
(26:52):
famous last words. Bye bye, Ronnie. Nice to me. You.
Thank you so much for coming on the podcast. It
was really amazing. Right, do you want I have a
couple of bottles of Chateau Diane if you want to
take on your way. She just need that, right, okay,
but thank you. Okay, we'll get the door. Sorry, she wait, Ronnie.
(27:17):
She was my best friend and you're my enemy. And
as promised, we are joined by feminist icon Glorious Steinham. Gloria,
I just have to ask you this coming out of
the gate. What's up, my lady. It's an honor, Gloria.
(27:37):
You you worked undercover as a playboy bunny when you
were a journalist. Um, during that experience, did you run
into any misogyny? Misogyny? Well, probably not because they were
not smart enough to know what the word was, so yeah,
tell me about it. It was. It was just wall
to wall exploitation. It was an assignment to write an
(28:01):
article and X was a I had invented a background
of being a secretary and wanting a more interesting job
because the advertisements for being a bunny said that this
was a glamorous, wonderful job. But the bunny mother who
interviewed me said, honey, if you can type, you don't
want to work here. That should have been a warning.
(28:23):
That should have been warning. Was that in Was that
in Chicago? No here in New York? And yet I
don't know if people even know what Playboy magazine is nowadays,
you know, you know, I'm sorry to say that that
now here in Manhattan a Playboy club has just opened,
even though it was given up as totally out of date,
(28:48):
even by Hefner. So I'm not quite sure how the
one here is able to call itself a Playboy club,
but it's pretty crazy that they just opened it a
few months ago. Well, I used to have I had
a subscription for as long as I can remember. And
I'm not just saying this because I'm talking to you.
I read it strictly for the articles. Uh, you know,
(29:11):
they had a formula even in the articles that in
no way were women allowed to win. I mean that
was was Hefner's formula. You know, whatever was printed or
whatever was photographed, it had to be clear that men
were dominant. Holy smokes, you and a sat in pajamas? Huh? Well,
(29:33):
I do think he was kind of pathetic and insecure,
you know what. I once gotten a fist fight with
him at the Playboy Mansion. No kidding. Well, they lost
my car. The valet lost my car, and so I
had to spend three weeks at the Playboy Mansion. Um,
it was. It was the worst three weeks of my
(29:55):
life because of all the Missalgermy. Yeah, all right, this
has been the best of season two. Uh. That was
a real fun stroll down memory lane, wasn't it, Carolina?
(30:19):
I had the best time. It really reminded me of
some past trauma I've had on this shell, some joy somewhere,
some past trauma. Hey, it's I've ever promised you a
rose garden? Well, you actually did say that I would
be getting a rose garden. I did. You said, don't
(30:39):
worry about it. Don't worry about it. At some point
in time, you will be getting a rose garden. And
I have yet to deliver on that promise. Um, but
I'm gonna put that on my to do list, my
honeydew list, except I don't have a honey to hand
it to me. So with that, we put old season
(31:03):
two into the time capsule and send it off and
chuck it over the edge of the ship and let
that corked bottle bob to some unknown shore. That's beautiful.
I mean this will be recording released but right, but
still it's fun to give it some sort of mystique. Um,
(31:24):
thanks again for listening. Uh this is Ron Burgundy uh
on behalf of Carolina saying so long shalom and that
Easter podcast. Hey Mama, Hi, don't tell you b
Romberg Podcast. Hello everyone, this is Ron Burgundy and boy
do we have a treat for you. I'm, of course
joined by Carolina. Carolina, how are you today? I'm good.
I'm good. I love your sun dress. Thank you. It's
(00:24):
um it's very sunflowery, Yes it is. Did you do
the embroidery yourself? No, I bought it at a store.
Why why? I think it's actually a high level of craftsmanship.
I'm being serious. I know, I'm just suspicious. No, you
shouldn't be. Um. We are so excited that you're listening.
(00:45):
I mean, we're always excited that you're listening. We can't
believe that you're listening. We are still in disbelief. But
today today's show is really special. It is. It is
basically a best of season two special episode featuring favorite
moments from throughout the season, and we've cultivated uh, what
(01:05):
would you say, We've curated a fabulous panache? Is pinach?
Pinash is also a food? Right? Yes, it's you. I'm
thinking of a grenache. Oh, anyway, this is a This
is a collection of real special gems from throughout season two.
We've thrown them all in the little goodie bag here.
(01:26):
Ron really wanted to do a blooper reel. I did, because,
let's face it, whenever I go to a major motion picture,
I usually show up at the last fifteen minutes to
watch the blooper reel with the crowds. Oh god. I mean,
the thing is that we didn't have that many bloopers,
so you were I could see that you're trying to
plant someone. I wanted something in that same family. You
(01:48):
pushed me off that chair, yeah, and little things like that.
So um So, anyway, we've cobbled some things together and
this is a this is the showing of that work.
Um Now, I know that Carolina. You know, throughout both
our seasons, you've you've done a lot of fact checking
on the show, and we've received tons of letters that
(02:12):
it's subpar, subpar um And that's not me trying to
be catty. That's just a statement effect. But here's the
good news. The cavalry road into town to save Carolina's
sweet booty. Uh, we've got a system now that's even better.
Listen to this. Hey, Google, what's the capital of California? Wait?
(02:40):
Did you really not know that? You know? The point
is Google did? Okay, So what if I didn't. Huh
what if you didn't. We now have a fool proof
fact check system with Google Assistant. That's what we need
to focus on. Okay, no quid pro quo here, Yes
maybe we Okay, get back into the Best of Please
(03:03):
enjoy this Best of season two. Ron Bergundy Podcast Today.
Does that sound right? Today? That reading of today? Yeah,
it's exactly how it's pronounce Today, we are interviewing a
woman who is very important. She's a very very smart woman.
(03:24):
She's um, this episode is on. I'm going to own up.
I forgot who were interviewing today? Are you serious? I
have a feeling it's not Ruth Bader Ginsburg. You tried her, right, Caroline?
Did you try her? We tried with Peter Ginsberg. But
her business manager said, um, this is weird. She said
(03:46):
you two had a falling out. I was I was confused.
She said you two were no longer on speaking terms.
You heard that right? For two whole years. If you
if you came to the Saddle Creek Diner on a
Monday morning, you'd see me and baby Ruth in a
corner eating breakfast and talking shop. You're talking shop. You
wouldn't understand it. Carolina. Okay, it's lost stuff, all right?
(04:08):
Did you understand it? Not really? But I let her talk,
and boy can she talk. She can talk you through
the Saddle Creek's Lumberjack special for sausage links and to
pancake piles. Later, she's still going on. And I'm sorry
to ask you, but why did you guys stop hanging out? Um?
I would say, scheduling conflicts. Well, I mean after we
(04:31):
had a huge fight, she said that she couldn't see
me anymore. So that was our scheduling conflict. Oh got it?
So yeah, if I saw today, I feel like bygones
would be bygones. So exactly how did you guys leave it?
Word for word? Well, if memory serves, she said something like,
if you start a food fight in this diner, I
(04:52):
will never speak to you again. And you started a
food fighting the diner. Yes we did, or I did?
Who can remember the specifics anymore. It's it's hard to
have a food fight when you're the only one throwing food.
You know, it feels like you're the apple in that situation.
But to get people to join, you have to just
(05:13):
throw more food. I mean omelets, jellos, a cup full
of eyes. I mean, nothing was getting this crowd going.
How old do you think most of the how old
were the most of the people in the dining Oh,
I mean everyone was in there early to late seventies
except for one grand kid. Yeah, so that's probably not
the best participants for our food fight, you know what
I mean. Ruth knows that I'm here if she every
(05:34):
wants to rekindle our friendship. I'm available for breakfast literally
every morning. Well, actually we record the podcast in the morning.
Any morning works. There is literally nothing going on in
my life right now that I would prioritize over breakfast. So, uh,
I just want to let that lie. Yeah, I'm out there.
(05:57):
Here we are with a real life brainy in the studio,
doctor Millstein, the brain scientist. He knows what's inside your brain.
Pretty crazy stuff. Let me ask you this question. I
know there's a lot of information on the amount of
sleep we get, right, So why do I need fourteen
hours of sleep every night? Is that? Do you get
(06:19):
fourteen hours of sleep at least at least that's a
lot of sleep. That's uh, you might want to would
you say that's a borderline too much? I would that
would be a concern. Oh, I thought I was doing great.
Yet you always say I need to make sure I
get my fourteen and I'll say I nailed it last night.
I got sixteen and a half. So that's not that's
not the way to go, right. So sleep is definitely
(06:40):
very important for the brain, but we're looking at more
the right amount as opposed to too much or too little,
So fourteen would be you want to check in with
your personal doctor. So during sleep, what does the brain do.
It's recharging, regenerating, just literally resting. So it's it's actually amazing.
What we've learned is that it's not just resting, it's
actually going through almost like a program, a sequence. And
(07:02):
so one thing that's amazing is that when you're asleep,
your brain actually shrinks down to about six of its
current size and squeezes out of the brain cells trash, toxins,
and waste, and it squeezes all that out into that
empty space. And then where does that go? So then
fluid comes up from your spinal cord and washes your brain,
so every night you have a brainwash. So that's why
(07:24):
it's so important to sleep. And then that waste in trash.
This is true I can show you a picture. This
is yeah, this is this is cutting edge, just getting
into the medical textbooks. So the brain shrinks, shrinks down
down to it. It sounds like a horror movie, but
it's real. Is there any chance that when the brain
expands back that it would go it would start to
(07:47):
explode out of your head. Uh, that's not a concern. No,
But but it's a it's a dynamic process. It's pulse
eights and it squeezes out all that trash and toxins
and waste out of curiosity. What if you have a
final cord injury? Would that affect the process? That's a
great question. So that is a concern, is that anyone
who has a spinal cord. Why was her question so
(08:07):
great and mine wasn't so great? I should have said
that you had that was a great question to go ahead?
Both great. Yeah. Um, the concern can be that if
that fluid is not making its way to the brain,
that the washing might not be as as effective, and
so you could keep toxins inside your body. So what
we're learning is is that even things like dementia, which
(08:27):
is very complex, or someone losing their memory. That's why
sleep is so important is because that build up of
toxins and trash, we need to wash it out every
night while we're sleeping. God, is this why there's a
new trend to drink your own spinal cord fluid. I
haven't heard that. I think that would not be a
good idea, because I could have sworn that's you know
a lot of professional athletes are now drinking their own
spinal cord fluid. Yeah, I haven't heard that, but that
(08:51):
it would not be a good idea, Okay, And so
during sleep time, what is the average man's risk for
being incepted? Incepted meaning like the movie Inception Inception. I
actually haven't seen that movie. So you mean you mean
someone sneaking into your brain and planting like bad ideas
inside your head A lot of times when Ron makes
(09:14):
a mistake, he says, oh, I was incepted, right right.
The statistics on that I'm not aware of. I would
say they're extremely low to zero. But I would say that, well,
what we can learn while we're sleeping is pretty interesting
because Inception is based on a true story. So I
don't know if it's said that, but i'd like doctor,
(09:34):
I'd like you to tell that to Chris Nolan. Uh,
one area though, the is you can there's some interesting
research you might be able to learn while you're sleep.
Maybe a word here that you might process it yea
like a foreign language or so that that's CPR foreign language.
I wish that was true. But it seems like maybe
you could learn a word here and then it would
be fun to take CPR and a foreign language, because
(09:56):
then you'd kill two birds with one stone. That's a
good idea. I popped it on your list. So you're
having a dream. Let's say you die in your dream.
Does that kill you like in Freddy Krueger's Nightmare on
Elm Street. No, that does not. That does not kill you. No,
if you die in your dream, yes, so yeah, your
dreams are not not based on what happens in your
(10:17):
and what's going to happen to you in your day
to day. That is a relief. That is an absolute relief. Um.
The other day I forgot to have my cup of
morning Joe, right, and wouldn't you know it, I punched
a hole through this wall. Uh, what what the heck
is that about not getting that morning caffeine? Yes, well,
(10:41):
caffeine is something that is very helpful in you know,
it wakes you up. People can help them with their mood.
So it's possible that if you had a bit of
a mood, SWEE had a bit of a mood swing
about your your morning morning coffee there, because I'm getting
fourteen hours of sleep and it takes me, what would
you say, another three hours it out of my groggy state. Yeah.
(11:01):
I don't usually understand what you're talking about until three
cups of coffee. Yes, but you've said some really sweet things,
and then after coffee you say, I become a normal
rational heat exactly. We are joined right now by our
cyber security expert, UH, Richard Greenberg. Richard, thank you for
(11:24):
for joining us here on the podcast on the weekends. Richard,
I like to mess around with my CB equipment. Um,
you know, I have one in my truck, uh, and
I just drive around for hours talking to my pals.
I've got the Muskrat, Howler, dan Zoid, Gruving, Gary, all
good buddies in my convoy. And if if you're ever
(11:46):
out on the road, my handle is frog Penis. Uh.
That's a long it's a long, funny story. I don't
have time to get into anyway. Is my CB radio
safe from hackers? CB is open so anybody can get on,
but there's not a whole lot you can do with
it unless it's connected to one of your networks internally,
which is most likely not the case. Some people have
(12:08):
actually done that, but I've seen your truck or your vehicle.
Then it's contained Roger that. Yeah, I'll tell you, Richard,
sometimes I can be a real ratchet, real ratchet John there.
I'll be talking to claw Humper, buzz Ball and Dr
Nathaniel Fernald doing double nickels on the dimes, saying, hey, muskrat,
what's your twenty next thing? You know, I got some
(12:29):
mama bear on my donkey. Okay, this is a cyber
security expert. He doesn't work with CB radios. And I've
told you before not everyone understands CBE radio lingo. Come on,
CAROLINEA quit acting like a lot lizard. Okay. You told
me that a lot lizard is CB radio lingle for prostitute,
and it is absolutely not okay to call me that.
It also doesn't make any sense in this context. Ten four.
That was out of line. I apologize, Richard gets it though.
(12:53):
Ten four ten four. See I'm just glad internet hackers
can't mess with my CB radio. That's that's a release. Yeah,
but that is an open line of communication absolutely, so
watch what you say or not. Yeah. Joining us here
in studio is Liz or childcare expert Liz. Thank you
for coming on the podcast today. Liz, what's a trick
(13:16):
or um on terms of how to talk to children
that more you see most people do wrong? Is that
too broad up a question? Oh no, that's pretty top
of mind for me. Um. So adults parents are blowing
it constantly. There are two things that when I see
parents doing that I know is really well meaning. I
get really excited about how to gently adjust them out
(13:38):
of the habits. And the first is when parents say
use your words when their child is having a tantrum
or struggling. The parent is trying to say, hey, we
can talk this out. I'm here, I can listen to you.
But what they're actually saying is, you know that hardest
thing for you to do, the most difficult way that
you have to communicate, Use that right now while you're
(14:01):
in a panic and you're crying and you're struggling. Um. So,
instead of saying use your words, I'll advise parents to
offer their kids what they know their kids are trying
to say in that moment. This is helping me so
much because Ron was having a tantrum earlier today and
I did, I was, I was, I said your words,
(14:21):
and he was having it was there was he was
trying to formulate the words, but they weren't coming. Now,
I see that was me. Let's walk through that. Let's
do a do over on Ron's tantrum and walk through
what maybe you could do the next time to help
you guys stay connected in that really hard moment. Is
that okay? Okay? Yeah, sure. So Ron's crying R I'm
(14:46):
just gonna let him go. So what I would say
right there, Ron, I see you looking for your bag
of the kibble, and you seem really frustrated that you
can't find it. Would you like some help so we
can look for your killed together? It's good. Yeah, Ron,
(15:06):
I still see that you're looking at your kibl I'd
like to help you, but it's up on a high
shelf for you. M hm. Partying is embarrassing by your face. Sorry,
that is sort of usually where it ends. I usually
lash out and I always apologize. My rule is seven days.
(15:32):
I have to apologize within seven days, and I wait,
I waited out and sometimes it doesn't come, but sometimes
it does, and sometimes it comes at the eleventh hour,
end of day six, exactly the day we are going
to do some audience participation. That's right now. I see
that some of you have written to us on the
(15:53):
internet asking for advice from your good old pal Ron. Yeah.
We actually have quite a lot of questions to get
through today. Okay, Well, everyone comes to me for advice,
love advice, fashion advice, raccoon advice. You name it, so
I'm kind of used to it. Um, what what's raccoon advice? Oh?
You know, I give advice on how to get them
(16:15):
into your house and domesticate them. Great at Jared Stephen
rode In. He says, me and my girlfriend are in
the middle of a fight. What's something I can say
that will end the dispute? Calmly m hmmm. Well, I'm
glad you asked this, Jared. You know, I love stopping
a fight. I in fact, I always wanted to be
(16:38):
one of those security guys on the you know Jerry
Springer show, Carolina, you know who jumps in when the
is hitting the fan. And just pulls the brawl apart. Yeah. So,
you know, sometimes I break up a fight before it
even happens. I'll just walk into crowded bars and I'll yell, hey,
cool it. Oh wow. I mean I guess that could
(17:00):
resolve a dispute that's about to start. Okay, but this
guy is just asking how to end an argument with
his significant other, right again, great question. Listen, if you
want your partner to remain calm, you have to remain calm.
It takes two to tango. You know what. That's actually,
that's that's good advice. I completely agree. Yeah, no, it's
(17:23):
pretty simple, simple blueprint. I mean, you should just calmly
say to your girlfriend in almost a whisper, listen, honey,
you're being crazy. Okay, you're losing your marbles. If you
keep backs in this way, you're gonna land yourself in
the cuckoo's nest. No, absolutely not run. You cannot call
(17:45):
women crazy? Well, then how should we tell them to
calm down? No, you should never tell a woman to
calm down? Well, then how will I let them know
when they're being hysteria? Avoid all of these words, all
of these sentences. M h geez, you know. It's just
it's so much easier dealing with raccoons than it is
dealing with people. Don't you agree? No, No, this is
(18:12):
Ron Burgundy. You're listening to, of course, a special episode
best of season two. Um. Some great memories here, great memories,
even though I gotta say there's a bit of a
bummer that we had to drive all the way in
here to record these intros and outros. Well, you had
me canceled to vacations and they were both on the
(18:33):
wrong dates. What are you gonna do? What are you
gonna do? This business is a fickle mistress, I guess.
I mean, we could have planned it out better. Yeah, well,
that's why I don't take any vacations ever. I'm on call,
ready to go. Literally told me that you're out of
the country. Last night, when I told you we had
(18:56):
this tomorrow, you said, I can't amount of the country.
I know, I was hoping you would. I was hoping
you would take the bait and cancel it reschedule, But no,
I wasn't. I was lying. Yeah, I see that now. Well, regardless,
we're here right. We had mentioned this before. We have
(19:17):
a new piece of technology in the studio, The Google
Home device, which you implied was a better employee. No,
I didn't imply I said it. Okay, well I have
been coming around to it, you know. No, it's not
a human that works from eight am to eight thirty
pm and was called with no lunch breaks, no lunch breaks,
(19:41):
and on Christmas you called me saying you had a
bad dream, and then on my way there you said
you were at Panda Express. But look, this could be
more helpful to us because watch, hey, Google, what are
some nearby restaurants. I found a few restaurants near you.
It actually is super helpful. Can do anything. It can
(20:02):
show you where the closest Panda expresses and then you
won't have to call me. I still might call you, though,
just for backup. I don't think Google needs backup. I
think it's it's got you. You know. It's interesting because
sometimes they have celebrities do the voice for it. That's
so cool. Yeah, and I don't know if I told
(20:23):
you this, but I was up for the voice of
that thing, and I would have crushed it. Yeah maybe,
but no, I lost out to get this. Guess who
I lost it to. You're gonna believe this. It's a
total I roll John Legend him, but he's a tough competition.
(20:44):
You think I don't know that. I mean, the man
has a voice of an angel and a wife with
a social media presence that's nothing less than delightful. But
let me ask you, does John Legend have any experience
as a newscaster? Does he not that I'm aware of?
Does Google? Thing is supposed to give you information and
news and play music? Right? I mean, the last time
(21:05):
I checked, that's the job of a broadcaster. I'm a broadcaster,
not some guy with oscars and Grammys and a beautiful
genius wife who has great personality and just totally nails
it on social media. I mean, doesn't John Legend have enough?
He's very talented and nice, Nice Carolina. Let me show
you I can do this. Ask me a question like
(21:28):
I was Google. Okay, um, hey, Ron, what's the closest
yoga studio? You have several options? I've sat that you're
on your phone? Also, do you really think yo guys? Enough? Okay?
That's in? Is that like a golemn invitation? I have
(21:51):
no idea. I made a choice during the audition, and
I I totally blew it. It is weird, right, it's yes,
strong but wrong against John Legend. I don't think I
didn't even have a chance. It's unsettling. Um, we should
move on. Actually, yes, let's uh well, let's get back
(22:13):
here with more of best of Season two special episode
and we are back with the Ron Burgundy Podcast. Today
we have Roni Ganosh in the house. Los Angeles magazine
calls her the star Somali A. I call her RONI, Yes,
(22:38):
what do you What do you think of a nice Burgundy?
And I'm not just talking about the wine. Let's just
put the chateau away for a little bit while you
sober up. I think that we have to get through
the inter you know, I feel like we barely got
to talk about I love Lucy. Are you a Lucy
or an Ethel? Because I'm a Samantha and Caroline it
(23:00):
as a Miranda. No, I'm not. That's you're mixing up shows.
I'm and for the record, I'm Charlotte. Which question should
I answer? Lucy or Ethel? You know the chocolate machine, right,
the conveyor belt, all the chocolates. When we're getting a
little often, I wish there's no right or wrong answer.
(23:21):
Maybe a Lucy. I'd like to be a lucy Oh wow,
well it looks like are you okay? Are you? Are
you going to take a little nap? Do you do
you guys ever wonder what any of it all means? Okay, no,
I think why don't you get your head off the table.
You're gonna fall out of your chair. Just sit back.
(23:43):
Do you guys have any more Yeah, yeah, no, we do,
we do. We definitely have a few more questions. Okay, hey, hey, hey,
come on, come on, you got it. Just Ronni didn't
see that, did she. No, you're a good run. Don't worry.
You got it? Oh yeah, ship shape? All right? Where
(24:08):
are my notes? Yeah, they're right in front of you.
Sometimes I just sit on the floor of my shower
and I just think, wow, who turned off the dance music?
There wasn't any dance music playing. I don't know. I
want to put on the new song by Degrees. They
aren't abandoned anymore. That's not true. That's not true. You
(24:32):
just don't listen to their music anymore. You know what,
Let's get back to viticulture vida who yeah, um, RONI yes, run.
Here's the thing. We only got so much time on
this big blue marble, and I mean, it just keeps
(24:56):
spinning and spinning and spinning. What's your question? I'm gonna
get to it. Four eyes. Sorry, why did I say that?
Because I'm glasses all right, I don't I like your glasses.
I apologize. That was uncalled for. It's okay, you don't
think at emotional. They just discovered a black hole, you know,
(25:22):
that was cool. Yeah, but we're all we're all heading
for that black hole. That's the thing and I can't
stop thinking about. All right, Yeah, you might see a
nap or so. Anyway, you're my best friend. Whom Who
am I looking at? I could be looking at Carolina.
(25:45):
You're both my best you're you're both my best friends. Ronnie,
you're my new best friend, and you're a little I
get get a good feeling about you. So I'll put
you number one best friend, Carolina number two. Thank you?
But um woy okay, cool, Oh it's been a long
(26:09):
day for you. Come on, ah gosh, if you want
to read some advertisements, let's get to some mad copy. Ronnie,
(26:29):
do you have time to stay? I think she has
to go because she was just here for the interview. Okay,
I just wonder if you walk at that door, Ronny. Sorry,
I gotta go. I will never speak to you again.
I'm so sorry. I will never speak to you. Wow.
Well it's been really nice. Oh you're doing it. Yeah,
I gotta go. Okay, but I'll see you around. Yeah,
(26:52):
famous last words. Bye bye, Ronnie. Nice to me. You.
Thank you so much for coming on the podcast. It
was really amazing. Right, do you want I have a
couple of bottles of Chateau Diane if you want to
take on your way. She just need that, right, okay,
but thank you. Okay, we'll get the door. Sorry, she wait, Ronnie.
(27:17):
She was my best friend and you're my enemy. And
as promised, we are joined by feminist icon Glorious Steinham. Gloria,
I just have to ask you this coming out of
the gate. What's up, my lady. It's an honor, Gloria.
(27:37):
You you worked undercover as a playboy bunny when you
were a journalist. Um, during that experience, did you run
into any misogyny? Misogyny? Well, probably not because they were
not smart enough to know what the word was, so yeah,
tell me about it. It was. It was just wall
to wall exploitation. It was an assignment to write an
(28:01):
article and X was a I had invented a background
of being a secretary and wanting a more interesting job
because the advertisements for being a bunny said that this
was a glamorous, wonderful job. But the bunny mother who
interviewed me said, honey, if you can type, you don't
want to work here. That should have been a warning.
(28:23):
That should have been warning. Was that in Was that
in Chicago? No here in New York? And yet I
don't know if people even know what Playboy magazine is nowadays,
you know, you know, I'm sorry to say that that
now here in Manhattan a Playboy club has just opened,
even though it was given up as totally out of date,
(28:48):
even by Hefner. So I'm not quite sure how the
one here is able to call itself a Playboy club,
but it's pretty crazy that they just opened it a
few months ago. Well, I used to have I had
a subscription for as long as I can remember. And
I'm not just saying this because I'm talking to you.
I read it strictly for the articles. Uh, you know,
(29:11):
they had a formula even in the articles that in
no way were women allowed to win. I mean that
was was Hefner's formula. You know, whatever was printed or
whatever was photographed, it had to be clear that men
were dominant. Holy smokes, you and a sat in pajamas? Huh? Well,
(29:33):
I do think he was kind of pathetic and insecure,
you know what. I once gotten a fist fight with
him at the Playboy Mansion. No kidding. Well, they lost
my car. The valet lost my car, and so I
had to spend three weeks at the Playboy Mansion. Um,
it was. It was the worst three weeks of my
(29:55):
life because of all the Missalgermy. Yeah, all right, this
has been the best of season two. Uh. That was
a real fun stroll down memory lane, wasn't it, Carolina?
(30:19):
I had the best time. It really reminded me of
some past trauma I've had on this shell, some joy somewhere,
some past trauma. Hey, it's I've ever promised you a
rose garden? Well, you actually did say that I would
be getting a rose garden. I did. You said, don't
(30:39):
worry about it. Don't worry about it. At some point
in time, you will be getting a rose garden. And
I have yet to deliver on that promise. Um, but
I'm gonna put that on my to do list, my
honeydew list, except I don't have a honey to hand
it to me. So with that, we put old season
(31:03):
two into the time capsule and send it off and
chuck it over the edge of the ship and let
that corked bottle bob to some unknown shore. That's beautiful.
I mean this will be recording released but right, but
still it's fun to give it some sort of mystique. Um,
(31:24):
thanks again for listening. Uh this is Ron Burgundy uh
on behalf of Carolina saying so long shalom and that
Easter podcast. Hey Mama, Hi, don't tell you b
Host
Will Ferrell
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