January 4, 2022 • 55 mins
Wild house party w/ fictional characters.
Window cleaners/Xmas conspiracy/afraid of heights.
Imposter contest final round.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:02):
Welcome back to another episode of Alchemy this I'm your host,
Kevin Pop. Yes, that Kevin Pop? What is that? Well?
When I was five or six, when I was embedded
and couldn't sleep, my imaginary friend was a long shadow
was cast on my wall and ceiling who I named
the finger because of its shape. I don't remember it's
(00:24):
speaking ever, but whenever I saw it, it made me happy.
Now you go, hello, huh and that's not fair, you fuck,
but I digress. That's I mean, you're about a shower
in no particular order. Let's quickly check in with the
craik Atkowski for his favorite side dish to bring to
holiday party's corner. Cacao beer bread, beer bread, beer bread.
(00:49):
It's so easy, it's uh. It's a can of beer.
The shittier the beer, the better the bread. I usually
go Budweiser, Uh, and self rising flour and a ship
load of butter. You don't need yeast sad of butter.
You mix it all together and uh, it's uh. It's
(01:09):
a holiday standard for me. So what are the exact
measurements I should be getting for the butter and all that? Or? Uh?
Did I say a shload? That's technical it should be
marked on the stick. And now let's check out the
(01:31):
Chrissovardo first Year in Review report. Captain Chris, oh, thank you,
thank you so much. Um Year in Review. Uh, some ups,
some downs, yeah, one of those. Some personal growth, a
(01:53):
lot of surfing. M HM said. By personal growth, of course,
you mean you're like six three and a half now.
I grew, which is so strange. It's so strange. Um
lost a lot of weight while eating a lot of pie.
Maybe I have a a bug in me or maybe
you know, maybe there's enzymes in pumpkin that because I'm
(02:15):
way underweight, which I talked about all the time, but
it's just it's concerning its cocin. We established there's no
pumpkin and pumpkin pie. I thought what we said there
was no pie in pumpkin pie. But I will say this,
you know what I mean? Come on. Hanging out with you,
with you guys, with everybody and all the fans and
everything has been really really fun. It's been really really
(02:36):
nice connecting with people on on Reddit and on Instagram
and just fucking riffing with you guys. It means everything
to me. So that's it. I love everybody. Thank you,
damn good report. Thank you. Hey, there's a tool sing
all the way. Are you better at gift giving or receiving?
I'm probably better at gift giving, actually, And uh, I
(03:00):
enjoyed that. I don't need anything, man, I don't. I
am very quick to show my face when oh, thank you,
this is very nice. Um, and it's I'd rather just
be like, do you want something and then we go
get it together, because you're not great when the gift
is shitty, yeah, and it doesn't. I don't. I just
(03:24):
I don't. Yeah, I'm not a birthday person. I kind
of hate it. So I remember somebody gave me a
book once and I was just like, what, we really
don't know each other and and I was like, I
don't want to put that pressure on somebody to be
trying to guess. Is that a teacher that gave you
a book was a good friend? And uh, yeah, that
was like that. Anymore, I have the book. We're still
(03:45):
we're not friends, but not the friends nice and last,
but may you wake up with a headless reindeer in
your bed If you think at least it's Joey Greer
Schlong Alterations expert, please tell us a secret you've shared
with one. Oh my gosh, okay, so we gotta look
kiss just a secular share with no one is I
(04:06):
have been doing my own kind of body modifications on myself,
and I was gonna do it unveiling a couple of
years from now when everything was like tip top. But
actually the software that's coming out and the rt xpans
are so insane that I was able to kind of
get upgrades that I was looking for down down the
road now. But the lower come on at the lower
(04:27):
half of my body. Damn all of our things. Suggestions
cock Titty are gathered from listener emails or from our
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of the show, enjoy exclusive content like standalone bonus scenes
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(04:50):
over to Patreon dot com slash alchemy. This suggest a
scene via email, Yes, please head on over to alchemy.
This email at gmail dot com. That's talking see anyone
comes from listener Andrew Grimes, who wrote, well, hello there,
(05:10):
suggestion you all go to a wild house party as
your favorite fictional characters Thanks Andrew from Montreal. What time
is everyone's gonna get there? Do you think to the party?
Are you talking to me? Sure? I'm so weak I
(05:33):
need to rest in the dream chamber before I can
answer any questions. Can you Can you tell me? Who's
the time people are expected at the party? Five? Five thirty?
I don't know. I believe the invites said five. You
(05:54):
should like to six? I should like to. Did you
want something? Oh? I'm so nervous. This is such a
big night. You look at the chips. This is gonna
(06:16):
be great. Say no, what were you gonna say? I
was gonna say, you look great? What's this? This is
just a ballgown? It's just a very expensive ballgown. This
is this is your This is your dream, your favorite
novel come to life. I know what's my favorite novel?
Say for me? You will say it together? One to try.
(06:41):
You know what earlier I said ball gowned? Interesting? I
didn't even notice. I know it's so straight? Was okay?
So you are going to wear this? Tucks right? Let
me turn around? Turn around? Do I look like the gutspeak? Oh?
You do? Look you look great? You look great? Um?
Should we have a quick little you know touch base
(07:03):
you and I before the guests get here. Sure, yeah,
that's good, good idea. Um. I will try not to
drink too much tonight. I will try not to drink
too much tonight. Okay, um, And then I'll give you one.
Maybe you can give me one perhaps perhaps maybe not
(07:25):
so flirty with the hands this tonight with our guests.
I will not be flirty with the hands with our
guests tonight, thank you. I will not call out my
partner for chores he doesn't do in front of guests.
That would be helpful. Now, what's the dress again? Nine? Uh?
(07:53):
Marvin Street? There should be five numbers. I shouldn't be four. Right,
Let me look, are you fourteen eighty nine one Marvin Street?
Are you sure it's one? Or is it? I? Is
it a one? Or at nine? No? One? Or an? I?
Is it a nine? Wait? You know you're right? Fourteen
eighty nine? I Marvin Street. Ship got damnage on the
(08:16):
part of town. God, damn it. Cheese. Yeah, that's east side.
Anytime an address inside and I that's east side. That's
east side. Man, it's always you said calibrating GPS. I
mean at least you're you're We're in good hands with
your tesla. Right, No, yeah, I don't even need to
drive this thing. Check this out, hands off ship. Oh
(08:40):
look right I went. I went through the windshield, Holy ship,
holyhet Tesla. Stop test. You gotta take my deer stalker hat.
You gotta go with Sherlock hopes to this party. Maybe
what I'm doing you dying, You gotta there's gotta be
(09:04):
there's gotta be a Sherlock comes at the party. No,
you can't know gremlin. Can't they give me Gremlin down?
The cant goes to showing on Elementary. My dear has died.
Oh good, Oh hey, come on in. Hi. You're a
(09:29):
grim Are you like a two characters in one? Have
you seen this sequel? Yeah? Grimlins t there's like a
different person out Are you crying? Crying? Terry died? Okay?
Oh character just like no, no, please come to come
(09:58):
this way. Dead man. Get botties out there the weekend.
We'll grab it. We'll grab him, grab himself. Well tortilla.
Oh no, he's Sherlock. He's alive. The test I said
(10:30):
I was dead. Take the hat, take the heat you sure?
Here's here? Sit down here, sit down, all right there
I feel glass in my intestines. You're really playing this up. Okay,
there's water. I'll get your water. Do you want it?
(10:53):
I'm with somebody you know you can just get I'll
grab it. Okay, I'll get it. This water is coming
right out of me. Oh God, you're finding would do about? Yeah? Alcohol?
I was at the door, hold on all right on
(11:13):
the count three one two three? Hello? Wellcome ah, jeez,
I don't mean to bother anybody. I hate to be
a paste. I understand there's burning murder. Oh, get in here.
Do you know who he is? Darling? I'm missing it
a little bit. I dressed in all white. I hope
(11:35):
that fits the theme. But I have come from another universe. Anyways,
where's the body? Right this baby? Did you to listen
to a who done it for me? No? I'm not
all surprises, no telling. Oh my gosh, he's such a
good gift giver. Okay, this is the body, everybody, this
(11:56):
is the detective. I'm not dead. This man does not
appear to be dead. Can I ask one question? Who's
the host or hostess? Okay? And when this man first arrived,
was he in the shape that he's in now? Um?
(12:19):
Um This is like a pretzel kind of questions. Can
I ask where you got those shoes? Why? Yes, you can,
but I will never tell fair. Are you hiding something, sir?
M I don't know how to answer these questions. I'm guilty.
I did it. I did it. Well, nobody's been a yeah.
(12:43):
I mean, it looks like the damage just from the
inside of the test loud. So there's not much we're
gonna be able to do about that, you know what
I mean. So I know you weren't the driver, sir,
but there's nothing we can really do insurance wise to
have testing still bleeding. I'm still bleeding. But I just
(13:03):
felt so bad about the accident. I thought I just
could take it, take that to the shop and get
an estimate. I was thinking. I was thinking, I had
a weird thought, what if we arrested the tesla? Well,
that is an interesting thought, and that a correction. If
(13:25):
I should be so bold, each lieutenant, I'd like to
be kicked, he said, someone you could talk to about that.
I don't know, but I was thinking maybe the tesla
because it's artificial intelligence, it's kind of like a person,
and it committed the murder, and and I like what
your heads at and your shoes? As I mentioned, let
(13:47):
me have a conversation with the tesla. Sure? Is this
the tesla here? Sir? Sorry? And you own this body shop?
Are you just working both? You know what I mean?
I go, I own it? Did work? You know it's
(14:07):
employee owned? Yes? Yes, so you know it's employee owned.
How you doing? Is that a cousin of yours? He
goes with the Instead of a cousin, last name, he
goes last name cousin. It's Is it possible for me
to have a few minutes with the test? Sure? But
what's up with all the shoes you got in that bag?
(14:29):
What's going on with that? I like shoes, big fan?
Can I ask what you got? Joy? Yeah? These are sketches,
are they? I hear? Those are very comfortable? Really? Come?
How would you pay? Would you show you own? Rounding
up by probably fair enough? Round up by two? Said? Yeah?
(14:51):
They usually come and pass. All right, I'm gonna go
ahead and speak with tesla. Now if I make cousin
super good? Yea, sir, h greetings Tesla. My name is
Lieutenant Columbo. I hate the value. I hope it's a
good time, not a bad time. I noticed you got
a little extra smile there in the front Tesla fin
(15:16):
number three two six to nine TLC at your service.
That's about seven letters and numbers. Shy of an actually
move in, but let's go with it. Um, can you
tell me the last thing you remember before the accident?
M I have video for the for it. If you'd
(15:37):
like to watch, even better, let's watch together. Shall we
play any popcorn? I hate to be a pen No, no,
of course not popcorn? On, Mr Stan, we have an issue.
It looks like the tesla's being accessed remotely some video
footage from the accident about two weeks ago. Should allow sure? Okay,
(15:59):
Mr co in a little slow, Mr Stand, I'm gonna
drop you down to access it again. Mr Say, I'm
gonna need that. I'm gonna need an answer soon, sir,
because these people there, they are trying to access that now, Sir,
allow it. Okay, coming in a little slower there, sir. Okay,
Mr Stan, We're just gonna rewrote that of power back down. Okay,
let's go into the protocol now, sector four nine. Sorry,
(16:19):
I'm sorry. Did somebody eat my sandwich? Did somebody eat
my sandwich? Mr? Stan I'm gonna take my computer below
my desk right now. I'm just gonna spit them. Okay,
this is an announcement for the whole crew. All right.
I don't know which one of you fire whispers. It's
just I don't want you to think this is a series. Okay,
are still talking about steaks, but a roast beef? Stand
(16:43):
went them? Right? I need to know the protocol access
now allow it, allow it. I will take your tongue.
They've already accessed it. I'm not able to stop it,
but I might be able to modify some of the images.
Uh my my, I'm want to find some images. Okay,
I can make one of the people that can make
(17:04):
one of the people look like a Gromlin. Cramlin. Cramlin
access Cramlin. Keep going through menophiles now accessing aperture ratio.
Make a little more light apertures light. Okay, thank you
all for staying out for the movie. Any at all? Feedback?
You can give us a course as the producers. WI
your feedback. Man, all those damn cookies you gave us
(17:26):
for stale as hell? Right? Well? Can I ask you,
sir a little follow up to the cookie question? What
did you think of the movie Gramlins? Well, I'll tell
you right now. I really couldn't tell you because I
was choking down those goddamn stale cookie and I getta
saw you that the title was slightly off. Wait, do
we see Gramblins? Because I haven't taken for Gromblins. Gromlins? Right?
(17:48):
That that is? Uh? That is next door? This is
the I just sat there two hours of Gramblins. I
didn't even realize it. Yeah, but how were those cookies? Though?
They were tearle Yeah right, I mean, god damn, I
had like seventeen of them, and each one kept getting worse,
driving me out, man, driving me out. You know, if
(18:08):
you're gonna be will sit through two hours of ship
you might as well make it so that it tastes good,
you know what I mean? Exactly? Okay, thank you all
for sticking around after the screening of Gromlins. If you
have anything that second, this is Gromlins, Yes, it's Gromlins.
Can I have a ticket to see Gramlins? Motherfuck? Yeah? Sorry,
(18:31):
that's next door. I don't know, darling. Maybe next year
we don't throw a party, but that's our thing, is
it all right? I forgot I brought bread beer bread,
and I've seen one, seen two comes from Pat who
(18:56):
wrote hello again, dear Alchemist. No matter how many bad
scenes of Jeff, since I keep pouring into your figurative mailbox,
the show keeps going. There's no stopping it. Huh. I
better up my game. Here's my next idea for a
scene in the form of three seemingly unconnected things window cleaners,
Christmas conspiracy, afraid of heights. Thank you for all the laughs, giggles,
(19:19):
cackles and accidental yucks TOI vo of Finland. So you
don't have to worry when you're up here, because we're
latched in from the top, and then we have a
secondary latch in case the first lets go. So if
this thing, I just want to thank you for like
giving me this opportunity. Uncle. I know I spent some
time in prison, and I know I haven't been a
(19:42):
great person. Thanks for seeing the good of You did
your time already, right, So don't you don't need to
bring it up anymore. You did your time. Are we
done up here? Are we done up here? Terry? Just
hold on right? So, yeah, well you did your time.
I don't want you, don't don't call me uncle. I
don't want people to think this is like a favorite,
you know. Just call me, call me Larry, you know, Larry. Okay,
(20:06):
thanks Larry, Thanks Terry, you okay, Terry. Gosh, I'm gonna
unhook and then I'm gonna try to walk to you. Okay,
I'm gonna don't. Why are you guys? Guys, guys, guys,
look look at the window. What the fund is happening there?
(20:28):
Look at what's going on. We're not supposed to look
in the windows. That's that's the window washers code. I know.
But there's a guy that is damn unhooking. Knock at
the window. Okay, I'm just gonna unhook. Why are you? Okay, okay, okay, okay, yeah,
I think they can see me. But what I'm telling
you is the Christmas party is tonight. Everyone's coming. You've
(20:51):
got to come. Uh. There's all kinds of surprises apparently.
And even though this fucking variant is scaring people, I say,
you make it. And uh, Marty, Marty, I got fired
two months ago, right, I feel like they owe you.
So they do. They owe me. They owe me back pay,
(21:13):
they owe me a bonus, they owe me severance plus them.
I'm not going to that fucking Christmas party. Glenn. What
are you doing here? Uh? What's happened? Uh? Oh? Hello, hello, Frank,
just stop by. Let's see my old friend Marty. Okay,
(21:33):
do you have a gun on you? Why do you
need one? No? I don't need one. When should I
call security? Well? What is going on here? Glenn? Look, Frank?
Uh Marty. Marty called me to come by so he
could tell me about this Christmas party. It could have
it could have been a text. It could have been
(21:54):
a zoom, now that I think about it. But I
showed up. I showed up to Marty's office at the
place that fired me two ago. Larry. Look, look, Terry
get in. Put your hands like this around the window.
Looks a gun. It's really against the wind against the
window washers code. I shouldn't be doing this. There's a gun.
How can you tell the outside of the rig? I'm one, Terry.
(22:21):
Interest won't even cover this. Terry get in? Why are
you holding on with one hand? Use salt hands my
other hand, other hand? Why are you hopping? And just
stop hopping? Terry, Terry, Terry at least okay, now both
hands are off. Don't don't. Don't, don't, Terry, give me
your hand. What the fund is happening? Larry? What that guy?
(22:50):
We have to go. I can't go back, man, I
can't go back. Didn't do anything? So big big party
to night? Huh, Frank sparing no expense? You know that?
And you know do you need? Yeah, Marty, you gotta
be is your office, Marty? Yeah, we need the office.
I will say this one. After all those uh, those cuts,
(23:12):
we had a little more coin in the coffers to
throw a bigger party. So oh did you Yeah, that's true.
There's gonna be a three hour Yankee swap tonight. Marty.
You have a hi. Frank Glinton? Yeah therese Look who
stopped by Clinton? Frank? Is this everything okay for right now? Yeah?
(23:36):
Hey Marty? Oh what are you doing? Frank? Um? There's Wellington? Yeah, sorry, guys,
we we have to evacuate the building. There's been an accident.
What kind of accident? What happened Wellington? Um? One of
the window washers? Wellington? Just tell us when the window
(23:56):
washers fell or was pushed off the window washing or
was pushed We don't know, I mean, Glenn, I'm sorry,
there's nothing we can do about. The car was completely totaled,
and since we've had to work for two months, he
fell on my fucking car. I was just gonna gonna
(24:17):
be here for fifteen minutes to run up to listen
to the Marty stupid pitch about going to the holiday party.
I don't know why didn't you just text me, Glenn, dude, relaxed, man, relax,
Let me get you a Budweiser. Okay, you just you
had a stressful day. You had a stressful day. There
you go, there you go, cheers, cheers. Thanks Anton. You
(24:38):
know I've been thinking, you know I do that sometimes
that you're known for your thoughts. Anton, I was thinking,
Christmas sounds a lot like miss miss m hm and
what what is miss miss? And you tell me what
(25:01):
do we call? What we what do we? Yeah? Like
the opposite of a win win is a miss miss.
I didn't even think about it that way. I didn't
even think about it that way. It's a miss miss.
You guys talking about miss miss? Come one, come on,
come on it, Glenn. This is my is my neighbor
turned best friend turned competent partner, bro Hog Buddy Brog. Yeah,
(25:27):
he's got some thoughts, glim, he's got some thoughts. Did
you give me his name or you just described your
relationship to him? Describe the relationship? No names, no names?
All right, Okay, what I'm about to tell you, what
I'm about to show you is that where are you?
I'll tell you, I'll tell you go co co co?
The hell? Are you? What are you? What are you
doing here? What is going on here? Nothing? Let's go
this guy? Who's this guy? Who's this new face here? Okay, Sarah,
(25:51):
how are you? Who's this guy? What is he? Just? Dealer? Sarah?
Let's just go outside? Can we go outside? But he
had drugs on him right now? He names Zach? Huh Zack? Yeah,
my name turned out of packing. All right? Are you?
Why do you need one? What that? Come and say that? Right?
(26:13):
I'll just finished my Budweiser and get out of here. Okay,
God damn it, God damn you know, Glenn, I'm starting
to think, you know I do that from time to time. Yeah,
you know, you're no good for no one I think
about that? You ever think about that? Maybe you you
just bring ship everywhere you go. Look, I had a
(26:36):
rough day, all right. A man fell to his death
onto my new car. I took it to the Tesla
dealership and they didn't want to handle it because some
other guy had gone through the window of the previous
card and there not a guy dressed up the real Columbo.
The real Columbo was there. Fired two months ago? All right?
(26:57):
You you you your your girlfriend left you two and
a half months ago. It's coincidental your family stopped talking
to you two and three. Listen. There's no comfortable way
to say this, but I feel like you're gonna get
fired soon, and maybe the best time for me to
(27:19):
also say goodbye. I feel like, Susanne, a package deal
might be best for you to for a fresh start,
to begin a new life without me or the job. Susan,
where is this coming from. I've got a good job,
I work with I worked with Barty, Frank and Wellington
and Therese, I'm out. Let's go maybe just there. Maybe
(27:47):
who is I can't learn any more names? Maybe Sarah,
thank you for meeting me. As you know, I'm Terse,
I'm I'm Marty's secretary. Marty and Glenn used to work together,
and you guys know Glenn somewhat well. Obviously, Susan, you
(28:08):
used to date clan and Sarah Glenn was at your
house or your neighbor's house. Why am I here? Well,
I mean it makes sense for her. Why am I here? Okay?
Because you've had contact with Glann? Is that right? Briefly? Yeah?
I mean that's enough. Briefly? Is still contact? Is this
a Clamdia thing? No, it's not a Clamdia thing. Okay,
(28:31):
it's it's worse. What there's so many much worse things
than lamydia. I mean, you know many, there's so many
more worse things. Three. Okay, if someone instead of giving
you chlamydia gave you a live shark, if if like
you know, the SD was live sharks, Okay, that's fine. Okay.
(28:54):
Another one might be um if it was literal fire,
if it was actual fire on the crotch, they think, okay,
are those are legitimate? These are? No one else gonna
back me up on this seriously? Like this, listen, I
asked you both here because I need to tell you
that you're both in danger. In what way are we
(29:15):
in danger? Glenn has seemed Glenn's got off the deep edge.
He is he carrying a gun? We think he is.
Now Some sources say they saw a shiny metal things
sticking out of his back pocket. Well, the sources are okay,
it's just I'm breaking some codes by saying this. But Larry,
(29:35):
our window guy, we've been kind of seeing each other,
which no one knows because he's an outside worker and
I'm an inside worker. So he's through the window where
he's never supposed to look. Speaking of breaking codes, shiny,
how do you do? Are you kidding? Are you on Instagram?
I don't have Instagram? Seriously, you don't have Instagram? Don't.
(29:58):
You don't have a smartphone, so you have a stupid fountain? Great? Hello,
I like you. That was really rude. How could I
get a six pack of Budweiser? Yeah, rough day, buddy.
Oh man, the worst I just found out from a
former lover that I got live sharks. That's the worst
thing in the world. Yeah, now I gotta I gotta
(30:19):
call all my other lovers and tell them that I
have live sharks. Sorry about that, man. Yeah, they're tiny,
they're tiny, but they're live and they're sharks. Hey, my
name is Garland. By the way. Uh, I'm trying to
how about what are you Garland? Just trying to get
to know all my customers. It's nice. It's nice six
pack for nine and nine. Let me just reach in
(30:40):
my back pocket. Oh wait, that's not my wallet. There
is a gun ho alright, looks like it's free. What no, No,
I wouldn't do that, Frank, Frank, turn on the news.
Turn I don't know where Marty is. This just uses office.
Turn on the news. Glenn has gone crazy. He's holding
(31:01):
up a liquor store. Right now. I was I was working.
I was working as normally. I was looking under my
desk for for the Marbles brother. As you can see,
right in front of the slurpiece stand the gunmen who
were calling Frank uh from a former witness that was
(31:25):
inside and then quickly ran out of this. Why would
Gli be using your name's slander me a bit because
I fired him. It was legitimate. I'm gonna go outside, Okay,
I gotta analyst myself. Businessman. It's a former businessman. Now,
I assure you, Garland will be here. Garland has never
(31:48):
missed a drug deal, and I don't think it's about
to miss one today, So we can all just relax
like nice casual drug dealers. Garland should be here, you know,
I gotta any fun fact while we wait for Garland. Uh,
did you know that buildings don't have a thirteenth floor?
So if you're working on the fourteenth floor, my buddy
(32:08):
Marty works on the fourteenth floor, you're actually on the
thirteenth floor. That is a fun fact. All right. How
have you been selling drugs? I've been in the drug industry,
let's say, on and off? None of your business. Oh god,
you gotta give me one second. My smartphone is going off.
Oh looks like there's a hold up at the liquor store. Interesting, alright,
(32:32):
and you get the alerts notifications, yeah, all of them
for every No, Garland, I am not trying to rob
you on, just trying to find my wallet. You can
have my firstborn. No, No, I don't want that. I
don't want that. Here's my shirt, take it. Don't don't
keep that on, none of those yours. Just don't, dude. Look,
(32:54):
I just want to pay for the six of Bude
Wiser like a responsible man. All right, lieutenants, it looks
like he has one hostage. There might be someone in
the bathroom. We don't know yet, but so far it's
only it's only the assailant and the hostage. I understand
he's no one dead yet, no one's homicide. Why was
I call you and someone might be dead in the bathroom? Sir? Okay?
(33:22):
Should I take the Duffel bags of shoes or see
a little pale? Have you had your temperature taken recently?
I haven't known. Do you want to sit down? Maybe
have a juice box? Sure? Sure? Hey, maybe I should
go into the story. All right, Thank you, sir Susan
for being here, and and thank you Marty for being here.
Not YouTube were his closest friends. Obviously you're a coworker, Marty. Sarah,
(33:44):
you're his ex girlfriend. Perhaps you can speak some sense
into him. Now, I have a bullhorn here? Uh, Sarah, Susan,
Why am I here? I always that like, Sarah, you're
just here for I don't know. I just I had
a moment with him and then my life was in
and I'm trying to get him a moment. It was
a brief, very that counts. Here's the bullhorn. Say go ahead,
(34:09):
it's all you go, um good goods. Just a friend, Glenn, Yes, yes,
stop being such a fucking asshole. Come outside? Who is
that is? It's mo fucking scene too. SAMEE three comes
(34:39):
from ALcom Nicholas, who wrote, how wonderful, Kevin, You're not dead?
Good for you? What about the offer to alcho many
acts to join a recording session? Yeah yeah, Nick? What
about it? Any who seene suggestion? Impostor contest final round?
(35:00):
Love Nick? Well, all contestants please come to Auditorium A
for the final drawing. That's all contestants, please me come
to Auditorium A for the final drawing. Very good luck man,
good luck sent to you, sent to you. Okay, this
looks yeah, this is a this is a Okay, okay, Wow,
(35:24):
let's get crowded. Anybody bring any extra tap shoes, any
extra tap shoes? I misplaced my tap shoes. You forgot
your tap shoes? For it? I just say, louis right,
I'm just I mean that could be grounds for elimination
(35:45):
from the contest, you know, like we were all told
to bring tap shoes. Shit. Okay, Well, good luck out there. Yeah,
good luck to you. What don't you be? Good luck
to you. There's there's like two hundred of us in
the final round for some reason. Why didn't you buy
this at all? But he doesn't work for me. He's
not on payroll. Louis like you are. It just wants
(36:06):
some respect. You you how about earning earning respect? I
got a job. I'm gonna window Washton job. I can
go right back to Louis. All right, okay, I got sorry?
Can I just crawl all the contestants here for a second?
It is everyone in this section right, We're gonna be
moving the tap section to the front. Okay, so everyone's
(36:26):
gonna have to tap first and then we'll be moving down. Okay,
thank you. This final is gonna last forever. You have
to watch two hundred guys do a tamparantine separately side
shoeing you. Maybe I could use your tap shoes after
you're done. I'm an eleven and a half twelve? Are
(36:47):
those uh? Are those capsios? Yeah? Nice leather? Is nobody
have tiny feet? You know? I used to do the
single screw, but I just feel like I get or
play with with the with the three screws, you know, right? Right?
So who who do you think the impostor is? It's
(37:10):
not me, I'm not. I'm exactly who. I've somebody who
knows about Capecio, somebod who owns Copeio. Certainly wouldn't be
the impostor. It's two of us though, huh around you
know my uncle, you say you could tell a lot
by looking into someone's eyes. I think he can. Yeah,
(37:32):
the window to the soul proverbia. Ah yeah's been a
lot of eye contact here. Listen, young man, let me
tell you a few life lessons. I think you're dying soon.
I am put those tap shoes down. Okay, I'm listening.
All right. Let's just tell you a couple of sayings, okay, proverbs,
(37:57):
some advice that you could take with you. Well, sorry interrupt,
Just need to check the bed pans. Just give a
quick look. See lou whom dumpsy doodle and it's been
a busy boy. Thank you. Okay, they'll just replace this
with a fresh one. Sorry interrupt. Do you want to
wipe it? Tracy, I'm gad Okay, I gotta keep going
(38:22):
to have rehearsal. He look at me in my in
a chorus line the show or just that's the hard
part about deathbed wisdom, Like they never talked about like
how much how much they're pooping and being themselves, you know,
so it kind of it kind of undercuts all the
wisdom you're getting you know, I think about that movies, right,
all these great characters and stuff in cinema, and let
(38:43):
we never see them us the restroom. Surely they gotta go.
You know what about bat Batman, he has some bad
strimp right, Are we gonna lose respect for him if
we see him on the can like those tights? Cannot
be easy to get out, right, right, Give me all
your money, money, give me all your money, kid? Oh shit, Batman? Yeah, please,
(39:12):
Batman see me. I think himself, I think smell. You know.
I gotta say impostor or not or whatever these competition
(39:33):
is about. You are one of the most real, real
people I've ever spoken to in my whole life. It's
nice to you to say, let me just get a
point of quarification for this competition. So the person who
is the impostor wins all the money. Right. If you've
never done an impostor contest before, no, no, it was
your first one, my first one. Yeah, good job getting
(39:54):
into the finals. Yeah, thank you. You know. The funny thing,
I was actually as as at a Mexican restaurant and
this lady was to be at the bar. She's looking
at me, right, and so I'm looking at her, and
she's looking at me. I'm looking at her, and I'm
thinking this is going somewhere. And she comes up to
me and says, would you want to be a part
of an imposter competition? Usually, yeah, I had no idea.
So yeah, So from the initial group of twenty thousand,
(40:16):
you know, when we started this whole thing ten months ago,
when now we're down to the top two hundred, you know,
everybody's gonna do a Taprootine also remembered their shoes, you know. Yeah,
and then there's uh, there's what there's about two hours
of intense trivia. I'm sorry, so you're not allowed to
leave the auditorium once you're inside. Understand you need to
(40:37):
find something. But now I'm sorry. So yeah, you know
we got we got one here, we got one here,
all right, so I'm sorry. That's ground for explosion. Your shoes,
turn around, your back, yeah, get off me, all right,
get out of here. That's one ninety nine. Now we're
now one nine. Actually worked for that guy. Should I
(40:59):
go out here? All right? Come out here? That's one testants.
Twenty minutes later, that's uh sixteen left moss contestants left
that feels like we're down to a manageable number, but
(41:21):
a lot of us are still the impostors make their
way backstage. See Christ, back here we go. Okay, good luck,
good luck. This is the this is the slam poetry portion.
Is that right? Yeah? Yeah? Oh man, that's that two
hours of intense trivia that we just got through. That
(41:41):
with one of you is number seven. We need number seven.
That's me. I'm number seven. Seven. I never got your name?
Uh two? Seven follow me plays? Okay, Okay, I'm gonna
walk you backstage. Okay, you've been wired already, right terriff. Okay,
(42:05):
hold on a second, right there, tell me I've got
seven here? Are you ready? I'm nervous. You better be nervous.
Can I give you one piece of advice? Sure? When
you get out there, look the audience, picture them naked
and don't ship yourself. Okay, seven go m M good
(42:29):
afternoon everyone, Peace of me. Next, it looks like we're
down to fifteen. Wait what wait? Am I done? Can
I happen to the margharita? Oh? Look who's back? Is
it a champion? I mean? Or there? Listen, I'm still
(42:53):
your boyfriend. That's what I am. I'm your boyfriend when
I'm when when am I to the competition? I was
your boyfriend, and now that i'm back, i'm your boyfriend.
When I met you here as a strange lady, and
I gave you an opportunity to go into that impostor competition,
I knew immediately that we're going to have a long
standing relationship. That was clear in our person. Can I
(43:17):
get you friend Margarita as well? Yes? Please rim on
the salt, I mean salt on the rim. I have
a cousin who but yes, please, yeah, I assume salt
on the rim. Yeah, what's going on here? I'll be back, beautiful,
just banter, just a fun time. Casting associate, I can't
(43:38):
tell you. I can tell you you have you have
to watch the show. I can assume based on that
outburst you lost. You have to watch the show. I
don't know. I'm with a live feed, so I mean,
I knew you lost from showed up. But I was
trying to be playful. And am I talking? Who am
I talking to right now? Casting associate or my girlfriend?
You're talking to me? That's what I thought. That's right,
(44:00):
You're you're seven, Right, you're seven? I thought you were
the impostor the whole time I had money on you.
Holy funk, Tommy and seven impost It wasn't a real
person the whole way through. Well, clearly you were, but
I didn't think you were. You let me down, man,
I let mother Margarita. Do your friends need some too?
(44:24):
Coming up? Yeah, i'll have Can you ram some salt
for me and get me another maga? Of course, I'll
be right back. Maybe you're the impostor, Denise, Well, I
didn't compete. What the fuck is everyone here at this
(44:46):
Mexican restaurant is an impostor. The bartender is an impostor.
These two idiots there impostors. You're all impostors. I'm the
only real thing here. This turn real awkward, But I
still want to wait for that drink. You and they
and they have a TV here playing the episode live.
(45:07):
We're gonna find out who the impostor was right now,
live great great constipation in the nation sensation. Alright, alright,
looks like we're down to three. Hey guys, just me
Ryan Sea Christ you want to say, I'm so happy
(45:28):
to talk to three finals right now. It's the same.
We're gonna such a great time so just just be up,
be happy, okay. And I've been for a long time.
I've been here longer. I do a morning show three
am to three pm, and then I come here from
three oh one to six on one, and then I
do a nighttime show from six oh three to ten
oh three, and then I gotta do the morning show overseas,
(45:48):
which is from ten o five over alright, and then
I take a sixteen nap and then yeah, you don't
need to say all that for the TV. Okay, you
got it. Man. I love my job. I'm not running
from anything. Yeah, I'll take a tink fries please, Larrie
(46:08):
number number two. Hey, my my real name is Simon.
I know Simon the finale, you know. Yeah, man, Simon,
we were I thought we had a connection, like a
(46:30):
real friend. No. I was laughing at you the entire time,
my friend. What should I say? My enemy that I vanquished? Well,
five thousand dollars, that's exciting for I. I've been bost Yeah,
and yet you still found your way into this jack
(46:51):
in the box. Yes, I did interesting, Simon. All those
conversations we had, all those weeks, none of them were real.
Jog my memory. Um, well we talked about my uncle
on his deathbed. Yea, sometimes those moments can not be
as impactful as they shou that was real. I assumed
(47:12):
that was a made up story, Like why why would
you tell me your uncle was shifting himself while I
was dispensing that wisdom, young man, Do me a favor.
Don't tell anyone about miss soiling the bed over and
over again. That's okay, Just can you go now? No, no,
I got one more advice for you. I'm sorry. It's
(47:35):
just room four to I. Yes, it is great, nurse,
this is the patient here. Yeah, that's okay. I got
to see the man who was dropping loads in that
pan uh. I'm a doctor. Get on the ground, okay, okay, right, okays,
(47:56):
good club, Russ is good, all right, grip. I just
wanted to see the face of the man who's dropping
some loads. Okay, I gotta do my round. I mean
I that was a traumatic moment for me, and I
thought you didn't tell me that. The whole thing, the
doctor holding you at gunpoint, that does make the story
more exciting and more plausible. I have your fry and
(48:16):
your Dr Pepper, can you can you you have a
card or oh gosh, I actually have a coup I
have two coupons. I have one free Fry and one
Cooper and a track in the box. I guess you
really could have used that half billion dollars. Did you
see the face of the cash you want to pull
up copons out? He's so disgusted with me, you know,
(48:38):
I'm disguised with me, because what's the point of being real?
It doesn't pay. It doesn't pay, sir. This says no
loud pronouncements here at the track of the box. I'm sorry, Hey, Simon,
best of luck or whatever. Thank you, sir? What sorry, sir?
(49:01):
One more thing before you leave? Oh no, no, the
you know you sir? You are a one million customer,
so you win. Yeah, yeah, the previous guy had paid
to buy one. We get half a million dollar prize
for you today. We got quite a win for Yeah.
(49:23):
There you go. Collectively, I have one a million dollars.
Excuse me, sir, could you step aside while I take
a photo of at this one, I was just watching
all this confetti falling from them from the sky. We
produced so much easier than that hellish last ten months
doing the contest that is our show today and ladies
and jetlemen. Let's thank all of our alchemists, shall we,
(49:45):
starting with Mr Chris Alvarado. Chris, I mean thank you.
You know, sometimes there's a combination of alchemists that just
it just there's a different feeling, you know, And today
was one of those stuff. It's it's it's exciting, it's
a loopy, it's it's a fever dream, you know. And
I'm just happy to be sick with the boys today.
(50:08):
That's That's sounded weird that so thank you for that. No,
it sounded beautiful. Um, all right, let's thank you, Mr
Toole saying also for being here during this busy holiday season.
Thank you very much for having me always fun. I
agree with everyone everything Chris said. And I also enjoyed
playing with everybody when we are are shirtless, so it's
(50:31):
a lot of fun shirts and skins. Craigkowski, thank you
so much for being so much fun. Has one winds down.
I did accomplish my goal of reading a book a week,
so I'm about to hit fifty three books to to
close out the year, and so the only plausible goal
(50:52):
for two I think it's a book a day. So
I'm going for I was gonna say no books in
the new year. M that also, that also is a
way that I could go. That's gonna be harder. You
have to do something about this. I have a million
questions which we won't do now, but like, that's fucking fascinating.
How about this? Is it? Was it worth it? Are
(51:14):
you glad you did it? That is real? Yeah, I
think a tool could pull off notebooks a day. That's
that's a lot of reading. You're also you're writing a
lot of thank you cards as well, Like, that's really
(51:36):
good person. That's a full time dad. Joey Gerstein, thank
you so much, bunny Boy, thank you, you know, wishing
everyone happy holidays, safe holidays, and most importantly, if you're
gonna get tested for tiny sharks, make sure there's a
marine biologist on hand. Very helpful. Uh, thank our engineering
(52:01):
Proves of the Stars, Mr Dugbane. Five folks and I
heard media from host Kevin Polla. Remind you please be
kind to each other. It's the easiest choice. Write a
review if you have some extra time. If you don't,
thank you anyways, until next time. This is
Welcome back to another episode of Alchemy this I'm your host,
Kevin Pop. Yes, that Kevin Pop? What is that? Well?
When I was five or six, when I was embedded
and couldn't sleep, my imaginary friend was a long shadow
was cast on my wall and ceiling who I named
the finger because of its shape. I don't remember it's
(00:24):
speaking ever, but whenever I saw it, it made me happy.
Now you go, hello, huh and that's not fair, you fuck,
but I digress. That's I mean, you're about a shower
in no particular order. Let's quickly check in with the
craik Atkowski for his favorite side dish to bring to
holiday party's corner. Cacao beer bread, beer bread, beer bread.
(00:49):
It's so easy, it's uh. It's a can of beer.
The shittier the beer, the better the bread. I usually
go Budweiser, Uh, and self rising flour and a ship
load of butter. You don't need yeast sad of butter.
You mix it all together and uh, it's uh. It's
(01:09):
a holiday standard for me. So what are the exact
measurements I should be getting for the butter and all that? Or? Uh?
Did I say a shload? That's technical it should be
marked on the stick. And now let's check out the
(01:31):
Chrissovardo first Year in Review report. Captain Chris, oh, thank you,
thank you so much. Um Year in Review. Uh, some ups,
some downs, yeah, one of those. Some personal growth, a
(01:53):
lot of surfing. M HM said. By personal growth, of course,
you mean you're like six three and a half now.
I grew, which is so strange. It's so strange. Um
lost a lot of weight while eating a lot of pie.
Maybe I have a a bug in me or maybe
you know, maybe there's enzymes in pumpkin that because I'm
(02:15):
way underweight, which I talked about all the time, but
it's just it's concerning its cocin. We established there's no
pumpkin and pumpkin pie. I thought what we said there
was no pie in pumpkin pie. But I will say this,
you know what I mean? Come on. Hanging out with you,
with you guys, with everybody and all the fans and
everything has been really really fun. It's been really really
(02:36):
nice connecting with people on on Reddit and on Instagram
and just fucking riffing with you guys. It means everything
to me. So that's it. I love everybody. Thank you,
damn good report. Thank you. Hey, there's a tool sing
all the way. Are you better at gift giving or receiving?
I'm probably better at gift giving, actually, And uh, I
(03:00):
enjoyed that. I don't need anything, man, I don't. I
am very quick to show my face when oh, thank you,
this is very nice. Um, and it's I'd rather just
be like, do you want something and then we go
get it together, because you're not great when the gift
is shitty, yeah, and it doesn't. I don't. I just
(03:24):
I don't. Yeah, I'm not a birthday person. I kind
of hate it. So I remember somebody gave me a
book once and I was just like, what, we really
don't know each other and and I was like, I
don't want to put that pressure on somebody to be
trying to guess. Is that a teacher that gave you
a book was a good friend? And uh, yeah, that
was like that. Anymore, I have the book. We're still
(03:45):
we're not friends, but not the friends nice and last,
but may you wake up with a headless reindeer in
your bed If you think at least it's Joey Greer
Schlong Alterations expert, please tell us a secret you've shared
with one. Oh my gosh, okay, so we gotta look
kiss just a secular share with no one is I
(04:06):
have been doing my own kind of body modifications on myself,
and I was gonna do it unveiling a couple of
years from now when everything was like tip top. But
actually the software that's coming out and the rt xpans
are so insane that I was able to kind of
get upgrades that I was looking for down down the
road now. But the lower come on at the lower
(04:27):
half of my body. Damn all of our things. Suggestions
cock Titty are gathered from listener emails or from our
patron v I p s to become a patron support
of the show, enjoy exclusive content like standalone bonus scenes
recorded just for you, or video of what's happening right now,
available only to you and several other perks. Head on
(04:50):
over to Patreon dot com slash alchemy. This suggest a
scene via email, Yes, please head on over to alchemy.
This email at gmail dot com. That's talking see anyone
comes from listener Andrew Grimes, who wrote, well, hello there,
(05:10):
suggestion you all go to a wild house party as
your favorite fictional characters Thanks Andrew from Montreal. What time
is everyone's gonna get there? Do you think to the party?
Are you talking to me? Sure? I'm so weak I
(05:33):
need to rest in the dream chamber before I can
answer any questions. Can you Can you tell me? Who's
the time people are expected at the party? Five? Five thirty?
I don't know. I believe the invites said five. You
(05:54):
should like to six? I should like to. Did you
want something? Oh? I'm so nervous. This is such a
big night. You look at the chips. This is gonna
(06:16):
be great. Say no, what were you gonna say? I
was gonna say, you look great? What's this? This is
just a ballgown? It's just a very expensive ballgown. This
is this is your This is your dream, your favorite
novel come to life. I know what's my favorite novel?
Say for me? You will say it together? One to try.
(06:41):
You know what earlier I said ball gowned? Interesting? I
didn't even notice. I know it's so straight? Was okay?
So you are going to wear this? Tucks right? Let
me turn around? Turn around? Do I look like the gutspeak? Oh?
You do? Look you look great? You look great? Um?
Should we have a quick little you know touch base
(07:03):
you and I before the guests get here. Sure, yeah,
that's good, good idea. Um. I will try not to
drink too much tonight. I will try not to drink
too much tonight. Okay, um, And then I'll give you one.
Maybe you can give me one perhaps perhaps maybe not
(07:25):
so flirty with the hands this tonight with our guests.
I will not be flirty with the hands with our
guests tonight, thank you. I will not call out my
partner for chores he doesn't do in front of guests.
That would be helpful. Now, what's the dress again? Nine? Uh?
(07:53):
Marvin Street? There should be five numbers. I shouldn't be four. Right,
Let me look, are you fourteen eighty nine one Marvin Street?
Are you sure it's one? Or is it? I? Is
it a one? Or at nine? No? One? Or an? I?
Is it a nine? Wait? You know you're right? Fourteen
eighty nine? I Marvin Street. Ship got damnage on the
(08:16):
part of town. God, damn it. Cheese. Yeah, that's east side.
Anytime an address inside and I that's east side. That's
east side. Man, it's always you said calibrating GPS. I
mean at least you're you're We're in good hands with
your tesla. Right, No, yeah, I don't even need to
drive this thing. Check this out, hands off ship. Oh
(08:40):
look right I went. I went through the windshield, Holy ship,
holyhet Tesla. Stop test. You gotta take my deer stalker hat.
You gotta go with Sherlock hopes to this party. Maybe
what I'm doing you dying, You gotta there's gotta be
(09:04):
there's gotta be a Sherlock comes at the party. No,
you can't know gremlin. Can't they give me Gremlin down?
The cant goes to showing on Elementary. My dear has died.
Oh good, Oh hey, come on in. Hi. You're a
(09:29):
grim Are you like a two characters in one? Have
you seen this sequel? Yeah? Grimlins t there's like a
different person out Are you crying? Crying? Terry died? Okay?
Oh character just like no, no, please come to come
(09:58):
this way. Dead man. Get botties out there the weekend.
We'll grab it. We'll grab him, grab himself. Well tortilla.
Oh no, he's Sherlock. He's alive. The test I said
(10:30):
I was dead. Take the hat, take the heat you sure?
Here's here? Sit down here, sit down, all right there
I feel glass in my intestines. You're really playing this up. Okay,
there's water. I'll get your water. Do you want it?
(10:53):
I'm with somebody you know you can just get I'll
grab it. Okay, I'll get it. This water is coming
right out of me. Oh God, you're finding would do about? Yeah? Alcohol?
I was at the door, hold on all right on
(11:13):
the count three one two three? Hello? Wellcome ah, jeez,
I don't mean to bother anybody. I hate to be
a paste. I understand there's burning murder. Oh, get in here.
Do you know who he is? Darling? I'm missing it
a little bit. I dressed in all white. I hope
(11:35):
that fits the theme. But I have come from another universe. Anyways,
where's the body? Right this baby? Did you to listen
to a who done it for me? No? I'm not
all surprises, no telling. Oh my gosh, he's such a
good gift giver. Okay, this is the body, everybody, this
(11:56):
is the detective. I'm not dead. This man does not
appear to be dead. Can I ask one question? Who's
the host or hostess? Okay? And when this man first arrived,
was he in the shape that he's in now? Um?
(12:19):
Um This is like a pretzel kind of questions. Can
I ask where you got those shoes? Why? Yes, you can,
but I will never tell fair. Are you hiding something, sir?
M I don't know how to answer these questions. I'm guilty.
I did it. I did it. Well, nobody's been a yeah.
(12:43):
I mean, it looks like the damage just from the
inside of the test loud. So there's not much we're
gonna be able to do about that, you know what
I mean. So I know you weren't the driver, sir,
but there's nothing we can really do insurance wise to
have testing still bleeding. I'm still bleeding. But I just
(13:03):
felt so bad about the accident. I thought I just
could take it, take that to the shop and get
an estimate. I was thinking. I was thinking, I had
a weird thought, what if we arrested the tesla? Well,
that is an interesting thought, and that a correction. If
(13:25):
I should be so bold, each lieutenant, I'd like to
be kicked, he said, someone you could talk to about that.
I don't know, but I was thinking maybe the tesla
because it's artificial intelligence, it's kind of like a person,
and it committed the murder, and and I like what
your heads at and your shoes? As I mentioned, let
(13:47):
me have a conversation with the tesla. Sure? Is this
the tesla here? Sir? Sorry? And you own this body shop?
Are you just working both? You know what I mean?
I go, I own it? Did work? You know it's
(14:07):
employee owned? Yes? Yes, so you know it's employee owned.
How you doing? Is that a cousin of yours? He
goes with the Instead of a cousin, last name, he
goes last name cousin. It's Is it possible for me
to have a few minutes with the test? Sure? But
what's up with all the shoes you got in that bag?
(14:29):
What's going on with that? I like shoes, big fan?
Can I ask what you got? Joy? Yeah? These are sketches,
are they? I hear? Those are very comfortable? Really? Come?
How would you pay? Would you show you own? Rounding
up by probably fair enough? Round up by two? Said? Yeah?
(14:51):
They usually come and pass. All right, I'm gonna go
ahead and speak with tesla. Now if I make cousin
super good? Yea, sir, h greetings Tesla. My name is
Lieutenant Columbo. I hate the value. I hope it's a
good time, not a bad time. I noticed you got
a little extra smile there in the front Tesla fin
(15:16):
number three two six to nine TLC at your service.
That's about seven letters and numbers. Shy of an actually
move in, but let's go with it. Um, can you
tell me the last thing you remember before the accident?
M I have video for the for it. If you'd
(15:37):
like to watch, even better, let's watch together. Shall we
play any popcorn? I hate to be a pen No, no,
of course not popcorn? On, Mr Stan, we have an issue.
It looks like the tesla's being accessed remotely some video
footage from the accident about two weeks ago. Should allow sure? Okay,
(15:59):
Mr co in a little slow, Mr Stand, I'm gonna
drop you down to access it again. Mr Say, I'm
gonna need that. I'm gonna need an answer soon, sir,
because these people there, they are trying to access that now, Sir,
allow it. Okay, coming in a little slower there, sir. Okay,
Mr Stan, We're just gonna rewrote that of power back down. Okay,
let's go into the protocol now, sector four nine. Sorry,
(16:19):
I'm sorry. Did somebody eat my sandwich? Did somebody eat
my sandwich? Mr? Stan I'm gonna take my computer below
my desk right now. I'm just gonna spit them. Okay,
this is an announcement for the whole crew. All right.
I don't know which one of you fire whispers. It's
just I don't want you to think this is a series. Okay,
are still talking about steaks, but a roast beef? Stand
(16:43):
went them? Right? I need to know the protocol access
now allow it, allow it. I will take your tongue.
They've already accessed it. I'm not able to stop it,
but I might be able to modify some of the images.
Uh my my, I'm want to find some images. Okay,
I can make one of the people that can make
(17:04):
one of the people look like a Gromlin. Cramlin. Cramlin
access Cramlin. Keep going through menophiles now accessing aperture ratio.
Make a little more light apertures light. Okay, thank you
all for staying out for the movie. Any at all? Feedback?
You can give us a course as the producers. WI
your feedback. Man, all those damn cookies you gave us
(17:26):
for stale as hell? Right? Well? Can I ask you,
sir a little follow up to the cookie question? What
did you think of the movie Gramlins? Well, I'll tell
you right now. I really couldn't tell you because I
was choking down those goddamn stale cookie and I getta
saw you that the title was slightly off. Wait, do
we see Gramblins? Because I haven't taken for Gromblins. Gromlins? Right?
(17:48):
That that is? Uh? That is next door? This is
the I just sat there two hours of Gramblins. I
didn't even realize it. Yeah, but how were those cookies? Though?
They were tearle Yeah right, I mean, god damn, I
had like seventeen of them, and each one kept getting worse,
driving me out, man, driving me out. You know, if
(18:08):
you're gonna be will sit through two hours of ship
you might as well make it so that it tastes good,
you know what I mean? Exactly? Okay, thank you all
for sticking around after the screening of Gromlins. If you
have anything that second, this is Gromlins, Yes, it's Gromlins.
Can I have a ticket to see Gramlins? Motherfuck? Yeah? Sorry,
(18:31):
that's next door. I don't know, darling. Maybe next year
we don't throw a party, but that's our thing, is
it all right? I forgot I brought bread beer bread,
and I've seen one, seen two comes from Pat who
(18:56):
wrote hello again, dear Alchemist. No matter how many bad
scenes of Jeff, since I keep pouring into your figurative mailbox,
the show keeps going. There's no stopping it. Huh. I
better up my game. Here's my next idea for a
scene in the form of three seemingly unconnected things window cleaners,
Christmas conspiracy, afraid of heights. Thank you for all the laughs, giggles,
(19:19):
cackles and accidental yucks TOI vo of Finland. So you
don't have to worry when you're up here, because we're
latched in from the top, and then we have a
secondary latch in case the first lets go. So if
this thing, I just want to thank you for like
giving me this opportunity. Uncle. I know I spent some
time in prison, and I know I haven't been a
(19:42):
great person. Thanks for seeing the good of You did
your time already, right, So don't you don't need to
bring it up anymore. You did your time. Are we
done up here? Are we done up here? Terry? Just
hold on right? So, yeah, well you did your time.
I don't want you, don't don't call me uncle. I
don't want people to think this is like a favorite,
you know. Just call me, call me Larry, you know, Larry. Okay,
(20:06):
thanks Larry, Thanks Terry, you okay, Terry. Gosh, I'm gonna
unhook and then I'm gonna try to walk to you. Okay,
I'm gonna don't. Why are you guys? Guys, guys, guys,
look look at the window. What the fund is happening there?
(20:28):
Look at what's going on. We're not supposed to look
in the windows. That's that's the window washers code. I know.
But there's a guy that is damn unhooking. Knock at
the window. Okay, I'm just gonna unhook. Why are you? Okay, okay, okay, okay, yeah,
I think they can see me. But what I'm telling
you is the Christmas party is tonight. Everyone's coming. You've
(20:51):
got to come. Uh. There's all kinds of surprises apparently.
And even though this fucking variant is scaring people, I say,
you make it. And uh, Marty, Marty, I got fired
two months ago, right, I feel like they owe you.
So they do. They owe me. They owe me back pay,
(21:13):
they owe me a bonus, they owe me severance plus them.
I'm not going to that fucking Christmas party. Glenn. What
are you doing here? Uh? What's happened? Uh? Oh? Hello, hello, Frank,
just stop by. Let's see my old friend Marty. Okay,
(21:33):
do you have a gun on you? Why do you
need one? No? I don't need one. When should I
call security? Well? What is going on here? Glenn? Look, Frank?
Uh Marty. Marty called me to come by so he
could tell me about this Christmas party. It could have
it could have been a text. It could have been
(21:54):
a zoom, now that I think about it. But I
showed up. I showed up to Marty's office at the
place that fired me two ago. Larry. Look, look, Terry
get in. Put your hands like this around the window.
Looks a gun. It's really against the wind against the
window washers code. I shouldn't be doing this. There's a gun.
How can you tell the outside of the rig? I'm one, Terry.
(22:21):
Interest won't even cover this. Terry get in? Why are
you holding on with one hand? Use salt hands my
other hand, other hand? Why are you hopping? And just
stop hopping? Terry, Terry, Terry at least okay, now both
hands are off. Don't don't. Don't, don't, Terry, give me
your hand. What the fund is happening? Larry? What that guy?
(22:50):
We have to go. I can't go back, man, I
can't go back. Didn't do anything? So big big party
to night? Huh, Frank sparing no expense? You know that?
And you know do you need? Yeah, Marty, you gotta
be is your office, Marty? Yeah, we need the office.
I will say this one. After all those uh, those cuts,
(23:12):
we had a little more coin in the coffers to
throw a bigger party. So oh did you Yeah, that's true.
There's gonna be a three hour Yankee swap tonight. Marty.
You have a hi. Frank Glinton? Yeah therese Look who
stopped by Clinton? Frank? Is this everything okay for right now? Yeah?
(23:36):
Hey Marty? Oh what are you doing? Frank? Um? There's Wellington? Yeah, sorry, guys,
we we have to evacuate the building. There's been an accident.
What kind of accident? What happened Wellington? Um? One of
the window washers? Wellington? Just tell us when the window
(23:56):
washers fell or was pushed off the window washing or
was pushed We don't know, I mean, Glenn, I'm sorry,
there's nothing we can do about. The car was completely totaled,
and since we've had to work for two months, he
fell on my fucking car. I was just gonna gonna
(24:17):
be here for fifteen minutes to run up to listen
to the Marty stupid pitch about going to the holiday party.
I don't know why didn't you just text me, Glenn, dude, relaxed, man, relax,
Let me get you a Budweiser. Okay, you just you
had a stressful day. You had a stressful day. There
you go, there you go, cheers, cheers. Thanks Anton. You
(24:38):
know I've been thinking, you know I do that sometimes
that you're known for your thoughts. Anton, I was thinking,
Christmas sounds a lot like miss miss m hm and
what what is miss miss? And you tell me what
(25:01):
do we call? What we what do we? Yeah? Like
the opposite of a win win is a miss miss.
I didn't even think about it that way. I didn't
even think about it that way. It's a miss miss.
You guys talking about miss miss? Come one, come on,
come on it, Glenn. This is my is my neighbor
turned best friend turned competent partner, bro Hog Buddy Brog. Yeah,
(25:27):
he's got some thoughts, glim, he's got some thoughts. Did
you give me his name or you just described your
relationship to him? Describe the relationship? No names, no names?
All right, Okay, what I'm about to tell you, what
I'm about to show you is that where are you?
I'll tell you, I'll tell you go co co co?
The hell? Are you? What are you? What are you
doing here? What is going on here? Nothing? Let's go
this guy? Who's this guy? Who's this new face here? Okay, Sarah,
(25:51):
how are you? Who's this guy? What is he? Just? Dealer? Sarah?
Let's just go outside? Can we go outside? But he
had drugs on him right now? He names Zach? Huh Zack? Yeah,
my name turned out of packing. All right? Are you?
Why do you need one? What that? Come and say that? Right?
(26:13):
I'll just finished my Budweiser and get out of here. Okay,
God damn it, God damn you know, Glenn, I'm starting
to think, you know I do that from time to time. Yeah,
you know, you're no good for no one I think
about that? You ever think about that? Maybe you you
just bring ship everywhere you go. Look, I had a
(26:36):
rough day, all right. A man fell to his death
onto my new car. I took it to the Tesla
dealership and they didn't want to handle it because some
other guy had gone through the window of the previous
card and there not a guy dressed up the real Columbo.
The real Columbo was there. Fired two months ago? All right?
(26:57):
You you you your your girlfriend left you two and
a half months ago. It's coincidental your family stopped talking
to you two and three. Listen. There's no comfortable way
to say this, but I feel like you're gonna get
fired soon, and maybe the best time for me to
(27:19):
also say goodbye. I feel like, Susanne, a package deal
might be best for you to for a fresh start,
to begin a new life without me or the job. Susan,
where is this coming from. I've got a good job,
I work with I worked with Barty, Frank and Wellington
and Therese, I'm out. Let's go maybe just there. Maybe
(27:47):
who is I can't learn any more names? Maybe Sarah,
thank you for meeting me. As you know, I'm Terse,
I'm I'm Marty's secretary. Marty and Glenn used to work together,
and you guys know Glenn somewhat well. Obviously, Susan, you
(28:08):
used to date clan and Sarah Glenn was at your
house or your neighbor's house. Why am I here? Well,
I mean it makes sense for her. Why am I here? Okay?
Because you've had contact with Glann? Is that right? Briefly? Yeah?
I mean that's enough. Briefly? Is still contact? Is this
a Clamdia thing? No, it's not a Clamdia thing. Okay,
(28:31):
it's it's worse. What there's so many much worse things
than lamydia. I mean, you know many, there's so many
more worse things. Three. Okay, if someone instead of giving
you chlamydia gave you a live shark, if if like
you know, the SD was live sharks, Okay, that's fine. Okay.
(28:54):
Another one might be um if it was literal fire,
if it was actual fire on the crotch, they think, okay,
are those are legitimate? These are? No one else gonna
back me up on this seriously? Like this, listen, I
asked you both here because I need to tell you
that you're both in danger. In what way are we
(29:15):
in danger? Glenn has seemed Glenn's got off the deep edge.
He is he carrying a gun? We think he is.
Now Some sources say they saw a shiny metal things
sticking out of his back pocket. Well, the sources are okay,
it's just I'm breaking some codes by saying this. But Larry,
(29:35):
our window guy, we've been kind of seeing each other,
which no one knows because he's an outside worker and
I'm an inside worker. So he's through the window where
he's never supposed to look. Speaking of breaking codes, shiny,
how do you do? Are you kidding? Are you on Instagram?
I don't have Instagram? Seriously, you don't have Instagram? Don't.
(29:58):
You don't have a smartphone, so you have a stupid fountain? Great? Hello,
I like you. That was really rude. How could I
get a six pack of Budweiser? Yeah, rough day, buddy.
Oh man, the worst I just found out from a
former lover that I got live sharks. That's the worst
thing in the world. Yeah, now I gotta I gotta
(30:19):
call all my other lovers and tell them that I
have live sharks. Sorry about that, man. Yeah, they're tiny,
they're tiny, but they're live and they're sharks. Hey, my
name is Garland. By the way. Uh, I'm trying to
how about what are you Garland? Just trying to get
to know all my customers. It's nice. It's nice six
pack for nine and nine. Let me just reach in
(30:40):
my back pocket. Oh wait, that's not my wallet. There
is a gun ho alright, looks like it's free. What no, No,
I wouldn't do that, Frank, Frank, turn on the news.
Turn I don't know where Marty is. This just uses office.
Turn on the news. Glenn has gone crazy. He's holding
(31:01):
up a liquor store. Right now. I was I was working.
I was working as normally. I was looking under my
desk for for the Marbles brother. As you can see,
right in front of the slurpiece stand the gunmen who
were calling Frank uh from a former witness that was
(31:25):
inside and then quickly ran out of this. Why would
Gli be using your name's slander me a bit because
I fired him. It was legitimate. I'm gonna go outside, Okay,
I gotta analyst myself. Businessman. It's a former businessman. Now,
I assure you, Garland will be here. Garland has never
(31:48):
missed a drug deal, and I don't think it's about
to miss one today, So we can all just relax
like nice casual drug dealers. Garland should be here, you know,
I gotta any fun fact while we wait for Garland. Uh,
did you know that buildings don't have a thirteenth floor?
So if you're working on the fourteenth floor, my buddy
(32:08):
Marty works on the fourteenth floor, you're actually on the
thirteenth floor. That is a fun fact. All right. How
have you been selling drugs? I've been in the drug industry,
let's say, on and off? None of your business. Oh god,
you gotta give me one second. My smartphone is going off.
Oh looks like there's a hold up at the liquor store. Interesting, alright,
(32:32):
and you get the alerts notifications, yeah, all of them
for every No, Garland, I am not trying to rob
you on, just trying to find my wallet. You can
have my firstborn. No, No, I don't want that. I
don't want that. Here's my shirt, take it. Don't don't
keep that on, none of those yours. Just don't, dude. Look,
(32:54):
I just want to pay for the six of Bude
Wiser like a responsible man. All right, lieutenants, it looks
like he has one hostage. There might be someone in
the bathroom. We don't know yet, but so far it's
only it's only the assailant and the hostage. I understand
he's no one dead yet, no one's homicide. Why was
I call you and someone might be dead in the bathroom? Sir? Okay?
(33:22):
Should I take the Duffel bags of shoes or see
a little pale? Have you had your temperature taken recently?
I haven't known. Do you want to sit down? Maybe
have a juice box? Sure? Sure? Hey, maybe I should
go into the story. All right, Thank you, sir Susan
for being here, and and thank you Marty for being here.
Not YouTube were his closest friends. Obviously you're a coworker, Marty. Sarah,
(33:44):
you're his ex girlfriend. Perhaps you can speak some sense
into him. Now, I have a bullhorn here? Uh, Sarah, Susan,
Why am I here? I always that like, Sarah, you're
just here for I don't know. I just I had
a moment with him and then my life was in
and I'm trying to get him a moment. It was
a brief, very that counts. Here's the bullhorn. Say go ahead,
(34:09):
it's all you go, um good goods. Just a friend, Glenn, Yes, yes,
stop being such a fucking asshole. Come outside? Who is
that is? It's mo fucking scene too. SAMEE three comes
(34:39):
from ALcom Nicholas, who wrote, how wonderful, Kevin, You're not dead?
Good for you? What about the offer to alcho many
acts to join a recording session? Yeah yeah, Nick? What
about it? Any who seene suggestion? Impostor contest final round?
(35:00):
Love Nick? Well, all contestants please come to Auditorium A
for the final drawing. That's all contestants, please me come
to Auditorium A for the final drawing. Very good luck man,
good luck sent to you, sent to you. Okay, this
looks yeah, this is a this is a Okay, okay, Wow,
(35:24):
let's get crowded. Anybody bring any extra tap shoes, any
extra tap shoes? I misplaced my tap shoes. You forgot
your tap shoes? For it? I just say, louis right,
I'm just I mean that could be grounds for elimination
(35:45):
from the contest, you know, like we were all told
to bring tap shoes. Shit. Okay, Well, good luck out there. Yeah,
good luck to you. What don't you be? Good luck
to you. There's there's like two hundred of us in
the final round for some reason. Why didn't you buy
this at all? But he doesn't work for me. He's
not on payroll. Louis like you are. It just wants
(36:06):
some respect. You you how about earning earning respect? I
got a job. I'm gonna window Washton job. I can
go right back to Louis. All right, okay, I got sorry?
Can I just crawl all the contestants here for a second?
It is everyone in this section right, We're gonna be
moving the tap section to the front. Okay, so everyone's
(36:26):
gonna have to tap first and then we'll be moving down. Okay,
thank you. This final is gonna last forever. You have
to watch two hundred guys do a tamparantine separately side
shoeing you. Maybe I could use your tap shoes after
you're done. I'm an eleven and a half twelve? Are
(36:47):
those uh? Are those capsios? Yeah? Nice leather? Is nobody
have tiny feet? You know? I used to do the
single screw, but I just feel like I get or
play with with the with the three screws, you know, right? Right?
So who who do you think the impostor is? It's
(37:10):
not me, I'm not. I'm exactly who. I've somebody who
knows about Capecio, somebod who owns Copeio. Certainly wouldn't be
the impostor. It's two of us though, huh around you
know my uncle, you say you could tell a lot
by looking into someone's eyes. I think he can. Yeah,
(37:32):
the window to the soul proverbia. Ah yeah's been a
lot of eye contact here. Listen, young man, let me
tell you a few life lessons. I think you're dying soon.
I am put those tap shoes down. Okay, I'm listening.
All right. Let's just tell you a couple of sayings, okay, proverbs,
(37:57):
some advice that you could take with you. Well, sorry interrupt,
Just need to check the bed pans. Just give a
quick look. See lou whom dumpsy doodle and it's been
a busy boy. Thank you. Okay, they'll just replace this
with a fresh one. Sorry interrupt. Do you want to
wipe it? Tracy, I'm gad Okay, I gotta keep going
(38:22):
to have rehearsal. He look at me in my in
a chorus line the show or just that's the hard
part about deathbed wisdom, Like they never talked about like
how much how much they're pooping and being themselves, you know,
so it kind of it kind of undercuts all the
wisdom you're getting you know, I think about that movies, right,
all these great characters and stuff in cinema, and let
(38:43):
we never see them us the restroom. Surely they gotta go.
You know what about bat Batman, he has some bad
strimp right, Are we gonna lose respect for him if
we see him on the can like those tights? Cannot
be easy to get out, right, right, Give me all
your money, money, give me all your money, kid? Oh shit, Batman? Yeah, please,
(39:12):
Batman see me. I think himself, I think smell. You know.
I gotta say impostor or not or whatever these competition
(39:33):
is about. You are one of the most real, real
people I've ever spoken to in my whole life. It's
nice to you to say, let me just get a
point of quarification for this competition. So the person who
is the impostor wins all the money. Right. If you've
never done an impostor contest before, no, no, it was
your first one, my first one. Yeah, good job getting
(39:54):
into the finals. Yeah, thank you. You know. The funny thing,
I was actually as as at a Mexican restaurant and
this lady was to be at the bar. She's looking
at me, right, and so I'm looking at her, and
she's looking at me. I'm looking at her, and I'm
thinking this is going somewhere. And she comes up to
me and says, would you want to be a part
of an imposter competition? Usually, yeah, I had no idea.
So yeah, So from the initial group of twenty thousand,
(40:16):
you know, when we started this whole thing ten months ago,
when now we're down to the top two hundred, you know,
everybody's gonna do a Taprootine also remembered their shoes, you know. Yeah,
and then there's uh, there's what there's about two hours
of intense trivia. I'm sorry, so you're not allowed to
leave the auditorium once you're inside. Understand you need to
(40:37):
find something. But now I'm sorry. So yeah, you know
we got we got one here, we got one here,
all right, so I'm sorry. That's ground for explosion. Your shoes,
turn around, your back, yeah, get off me, all right,
get out of here. That's one ninety nine. Now we're
now one nine. Actually worked for that guy. Should I
(40:59):
go out here? All right? Come out here? That's one testants.
Twenty minutes later, that's uh sixteen left moss contestants left
that feels like we're down to a manageable number, but
(41:21):
a lot of us are still the impostors make their
way backstage. See Christ, back here we go. Okay, good luck,
good luck. This is the this is the slam poetry portion.
Is that right? Yeah? Yeah? Oh man, that's that two
hours of intense trivia that we just got through. That
(41:41):
with one of you is number seven. We need number seven.
That's me. I'm number seven. Seven. I never got your name?
Uh two? Seven follow me plays? Okay, Okay, I'm gonna
walk you backstage. Okay, you've been wired already, right terriff. Okay,
(42:05):
hold on a second, right there, tell me I've got
seven here? Are you ready? I'm nervous. You better be nervous.
Can I give you one piece of advice? Sure? When
you get out there, look the audience, picture them naked
and don't ship yourself. Okay, seven go m M good
(42:29):
afternoon everyone, Peace of me. Next, it looks like we're
down to fifteen. Wait what wait? Am I done? Can
I happen to the margharita? Oh? Look who's back? Is
it a champion? I mean? Or there? Listen, I'm still
(42:53):
your boyfriend. That's what I am. I'm your boyfriend when
I'm when when am I to the competition? I was
your boyfriend, and now that i'm back, i'm your boyfriend.
When I met you here as a strange lady, and
I gave you an opportunity to go into that impostor competition,
I knew immediately that we're going to have a long
standing relationship. That was clear in our person. Can I
(43:17):
get you friend Margarita as well? Yes? Please rim on
the salt, I mean salt on the rim. I have
a cousin who but yes, please, yeah, I assume salt
on the rim. Yeah, what's going on here? I'll be back, beautiful,
just banter, just a fun time. Casting associate, I can't
(43:38):
tell you. I can tell you you have you have
to watch the show. I can assume based on that
outburst you lost. You have to watch the show. I
don't know. I'm with a live feed, so I mean,
I knew you lost from showed up. But I was
trying to be playful. And am I talking? Who am
I talking to right now? Casting associate or my girlfriend?
You're talking to me? That's what I thought. That's right,
(44:00):
You're you're seven, Right, you're seven? I thought you were
the impostor the whole time I had money on you.
Holy funk, Tommy and seven impost It wasn't a real
person the whole way through. Well, clearly you were, but
I didn't think you were. You let me down, man,
I let mother Margarita. Do your friends need some too?
(44:24):
Coming up? Yeah, i'll have Can you ram some salt
for me and get me another maga? Of course, I'll
be right back. Maybe you're the impostor, Denise, Well, I
didn't compete. What the fuck is everyone here at this
(44:46):
Mexican restaurant is an impostor. The bartender is an impostor.
These two idiots there impostors. You're all impostors. I'm the
only real thing here. This turn real awkward, But I
still want to wait for that drink. You and they
and they have a TV here playing the episode live.
(45:07):
We're gonna find out who the impostor was right now,
live great great constipation in the nation sensation. Alright, alright,
looks like we're down to three. Hey guys, just me
Ryan Sea Christ you want to say, I'm so happy
(45:28):
to talk to three finals right now. It's the same.
We're gonna such a great time so just just be up,
be happy, okay. And I've been for a long time.
I've been here longer. I do a morning show three
am to three pm, and then I come here from
three oh one to six on one, and then I
do a nighttime show from six oh three to ten
oh three, and then I gotta do the morning show overseas,
(45:48):
which is from ten o five over alright, and then
I take a sixteen nap and then yeah, you don't
need to say all that for the TV. Okay, you
got it. Man. I love my job. I'm not running
from anything. Yeah, I'll take a tink fries please, Larrie
(46:08):
number number two. Hey, my my real name is Simon.
I know Simon the finale, you know. Yeah, man, Simon,
we were I thought we had a connection, like a
(46:30):
real friend. No. I was laughing at you the entire time,
my friend. What should I say? My enemy that I vanquished? Well,
five thousand dollars, that's exciting for I. I've been bost Yeah,
and yet you still found your way into this jack
(46:51):
in the box. Yes, I did interesting, Simon. All those
conversations we had, all those weeks, none of them were real.
Jog my memory. Um, well we talked about my uncle
on his deathbed. Yea, sometimes those moments can not be
as impactful as they shou that was real. I assumed
(47:12):
that was a made up story, Like why why would
you tell me your uncle was shifting himself while I
was dispensing that wisdom, young man, Do me a favor.
Don't tell anyone about miss soiling the bed over and
over again. That's okay, Just can you go now? No, no,
I got one more advice for you. I'm sorry. It's
(47:35):
just room four to I. Yes, it is great, nurse,
this is the patient here. Yeah, that's okay. I got
to see the man who was dropping loads in that
pan uh. I'm a doctor. Get on the ground, okay, okay, right, okays,
(47:56):
good club, Russ is good, all right, grip. I just
wanted to see the face of the man who's dropping
some loads. Okay, I gotta do my round. I mean
I that was a traumatic moment for me, and I
thought you didn't tell me that. The whole thing, the
doctor holding you at gunpoint, that does make the story
more exciting and more plausible. I have your fry and
(48:16):
your Dr Pepper, can you can you you have a
card or oh gosh, I actually have a coup I
have two coupons. I have one free Fry and one
Cooper and a track in the box. I guess you
really could have used that half billion dollars. Did you
see the face of the cash you want to pull
up copons out? He's so disgusted with me, you know,
(48:38):
I'm disguised with me, because what's the point of being real?
It doesn't pay. It doesn't pay, sir. This says no
loud pronouncements here at the track of the box. I'm sorry, Hey, Simon,
best of luck or whatever. Thank you, sir? What sorry, sir?
(49:01):
One more thing before you leave? Oh no, no, the
you know you sir? You are a one million customer,
so you win. Yeah, yeah, the previous guy had paid
to buy one. We get half a million dollar prize
for you today. We got quite a win for Yeah.
(49:23):
There you go. Collectively, I have one a million dollars.
Excuse me, sir, could you step aside while I take
a photo of at this one, I was just watching
all this confetti falling from them from the sky. We
produced so much easier than that hellish last ten months
doing the contest that is our show today and ladies
and jetlemen. Let's thank all of our alchemists, shall we,
(49:45):
starting with Mr Chris Alvarado. Chris, I mean thank you.
You know, sometimes there's a combination of alchemists that just
it just there's a different feeling, you know, And today
was one of those stuff. It's it's it's exciting, it's
a loopy, it's it's a fever dream, you know. And
I'm just happy to be sick with the boys today.
(50:08):
That's That's sounded weird that so thank you for that. No,
it sounded beautiful. Um, all right, let's thank you, Mr
Toole saying also for being here during this busy holiday season.
Thank you very much for having me always fun. I
agree with everyone everything Chris said. And I also enjoyed
playing with everybody when we are are shirtless, so it's
(50:31):
a lot of fun shirts and skins. Craigkowski, thank you
so much for being so much fun. Has one winds down.
I did accomplish my goal of reading a book a week,
so I'm about to hit fifty three books to to
close out the year, and so the only plausible goal
(50:52):
for two I think it's a book a day. So
I'm going for I was gonna say no books in
the new year. M that also, that also is a
way that I could go. That's gonna be harder. You
have to do something about this. I have a million
questions which we won't do now, but like, that's fucking fascinating.
How about this? Is it? Was it worth it? Are
(51:14):
you glad you did it? That is real? Yeah, I
think a tool could pull off notebooks a day. That's
that's a lot of reading. You're also you're writing a
lot of thank you cards as well, Like, that's really
(51:36):
good person. That's a full time dad. Joey Gerstein, thank
you so much, bunny Boy, thank you, you know, wishing
everyone happy holidays, safe holidays, and most importantly, if you're
gonna get tested for tiny sharks, make sure there's a
marine biologist on hand. Very helpful. Uh, thank our engineering
(52:01):
Proves of the Stars, Mr Dugbane. Five folks and I
heard media from host Kevin Polla. Remind you please be
kind to each other. It's the easiest choice. Write a
review if you have some extra time. If you don't,
thank you anyways, until next time. This is
Alchemy This News
Host
Kevin Pollak
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