Choose your Joneses

Make sure you compare yourself to the right people

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:03):
Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of iHeartRadio. Good Morning,
This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. Today's
tip is to choose who you are comparing yourself to.
Maybe comparing ourselves to others is unavoidable, but at least

(00:25):
we can be intentional about the bars we are setting.
So it is probably inevitable to feel pressure to keep
up with the Joneses, as the saying goes. But what's
interesting about this is that the Joneses tend almost universally
to be people who have a little bit more than us.

(00:47):
Maybe their clothes, they are a little nicer, they take
swankier vacations, they have more interesting jobs, and their kids
look a little less disheveled. It's interesting because if you
are listening to this podcast, the odds are good that
the proportion of the world's population that has less than

(01:07):
you is huge. We might be ninety eight out of
one hundred in terms of resources. Yet rather than looking
at the ninety seven folks with less, we are looking
at the one or two with more. It is fascinating
and says a lot about human nature. But when you
realize this tendency, then you can choose different Joneses to

(01:30):
help motivate you toward a better life. For instance, you
can choose Joneses whose values, habits, and interests you admire.
That way, you can be inspired to improve in those areas.
So if you want to have a good relationship with
your teen and young adult children, look for parents who

(01:52):
are just a little bit ahead of you on the
parenting journey and who seem to be doing a good
job with this. What are they doing, what can you replicate?
What can you learn from them? If you are a
spiritual person, maybe you admire someone at your house of
worship who seems to have a calm and confident faith.

(02:13):
Maybe you can arrange to hang out more with this person,
join a small group with him, volunteer with him. See
what he does and how he responds to things in
his habits, and see what you might emulate. Or maybe
you have a friend who has recently made a big
career change. You have been thinking of one too, but

(02:34):
it seems out of reach. Start considering this friend your Jones's.
If she can do it, maybe it's not out of
the realm of possibility for you either. Spend more time
with her, ask questions, follow her journey some of her
courage may rub off on you. When you seek out

(02:59):
people you admire and want to be more like, and
people whose values and animating questions connect with yours, the
inevitable comparisons will nudge you toward becoming the person you
want to be, rather than turn your focus to things
you don't really care about. I mean, yes, those people
on Instagram do have nice outfits, but if we are

(03:21):
going to feel envy, let's turn that envy towards something constructive.
Choose the right joneses to keep up with, and that
just might be possible. In the meantime, this is Laura.
Thanks for listening, and here's to making the most of

(03:42):
our time. Thanks for listening to Before Breakfast. If you've
got questions, ideas, or feedback, you can reach me at
Laura at Laura vandercam dot com. Before Breakfast is a

(04:05):
production of iHeartMedia. For more podcasts from iHeartMedia, please visit
the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to
your favorite shows.