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November 9, 2022 5 mins

Think about answers to common questions ahead of time

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Speaker 1 (00:03):
Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of I Heart Radio.
Good Morning, This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast.
Today's tip is to think ahead of time about conversations
you are likely to have and consider what you might

(00:24):
like to say. We can often anticipate the questions people
might ask. Having a good story or answer in advance
can make you feel more relaxed in the moment and
can help you enjoy any event more. If you think
about it, you realize that at any gathering, the opening

(00:48):
questions will be relatively predictable. If you are headed to
a class reunion, you know your classmates will ask what
you're up to these days. The other parents set back
to school night, we'll ask how school is going for
your child. Most likely the icebreaker at a meeting right
around Thanksgiving, we'll have something to do with what you

(01:10):
are grateful for. If you are going to a colleague's
going away party, you will be asked for stories about
your time together. If you are going to a wedding,
you will be asked how you know the bride or
groom or their families. These questions don't really require a
huge leap of imagination to picture, and yet many of

(01:34):
us stumble when we are asked these questions, Um, what
am I up to these days? I don't know school
is good this year? Or hmm stories about Joan That
awkwardness can be avoided by giving a moment's thought to
how you might respond to the questions you know you

(01:56):
are going to be asked. You don't need a whole
l of leader speech, but picking some detail that you
will be happy to talk about can go a long
way toward making the whole experience more fruitful. So if
you are on your way to a reunion, you might
decide that whenever somebody asks you will mention that you

(02:19):
started a side gig as a professional organizer after your
last kid left for college. Or if you are in
the stage of life where you are still doing back
to school nights, maybe you can answer how much your
son is enjoying playing trumpet in band. You can pick
one socially acceptable thing to tell your colleagues you are

(02:39):
grateful for, like seeing their smiling faces in the break
room again after a long time of social distancing. If
you will be interacting with someone who may be slower
to engage, it can be especially valuable to consider how
you could spark conversation. For instance, if you are visiting

(03:00):
a quiet elderly relative, think about family stories or photos
you'd like to share, or topics you'd like to ask
your relative about. Of course, there are lots of social
context when you can't predict the conversation. Who knows what
topics will come up at the cocktail party or a

(03:20):
neighborhood barbecue. But you can still have some ideas for
interesting directions to steer the conversation. Perhaps you can mention
a book you've recently read that you think others would
be interested in, an upcoming travel destination, that people might
have recommendations for a milestone in a child's life. You'd

(03:41):
love to talk about your hopes for the local sports
team now that a strong new player has joined the ranks.
These are all upbeat conversations of broad interest. Consider what
has made you happy, curious, or hopeful recently, and be
ready to share it with others. When we think about

(04:05):
conversations in advance, we can alleviate any anxiety and prepare
ourselves to move the conversation in interesting, relationship building or
productive directions. That certainly beats the awkwardness that ensues when
we don't think about such things. Maybe some folks are
naturally great conversationalists, many of us are not. Fortunately, it

(04:33):
doesn't take too much time to prepare, and when we
do prepare, we can relax and enjoy ourselves rather than
worrying that we will say the wrong thing. In the meantime,
this is Laura. Thanks for listening, and here's to making

(04:53):
the most of our time. M Hey everybody, I'd love
to hear from you. You can send me your tips,
your questions, or anything else. Just connect with me on Twitter,
Facebook and Instagram at Before Breakfast pod. That's b E

(05:14):
the number four, then Breakfast p o D. You can
also shoot me an email at Before Breakfast podcast at
i heeart media dot com that Before Breakfast is spelled
out with all the letters. Thanks so much, I look
forward to staying in touch. Before Breakfast is a production

(05:35):
of I Heart Radio. For more podcasts from my heart Radio,
visit the I heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever
you listen to your favorite shows.

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Laura Vanderkam

Laura Vanderkam

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