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December 6, 2023 4 mins

This mindset can make a long process less discouraging

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Speaker 1 (00:03):
Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of iHeartRadio. Good Morning,
This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. Today's
tip is about one way to keep plotting along toward
a goal, even if the process feels discouraging or unpleasant.

(00:27):
You can tell yourself that someday you will be telling
this story and all this muddling through will just be
the obstacles that the hero had to face on his journey.
The outcome is certain. What's going on now is just
making the plot more interesting. So not long ago, I

(00:52):
had a conversation with a friend who was finding dating
incredibly discouraging. It was all the usual complaints. People weren't
who they said they were, people didn't show up, or
they ghosted. I said something along the lines that dating
was terrible until the moment it wasn't when you met

(01:15):
that person who you could see building a life with.
So how does one get through the rough stuff? One
option is to picture yourself with this future mister or missus. Right,
the two of you are deeply in love, sharing a
happy moment together. You are laughing about all the ridiculous

(01:36):
dates both of you went on with other people until
you met each other. Someday you will be telling this story.
All this messiness just becomes material. Same thing with job hunting.
I know this can be as discouraging as dating. You

(01:57):
know you have useful skills, and yet it is hard
to convince impersonal organizations of just how helpful you could be.
Along the way, there are interviewers who are late, or
who mispronounce your name, or who don't even seem to
understand what you are talking about. There are jobs that
sound great and then strangely disappear. There's a lot of silence,

(02:22):
and sometimes people who you thought would be helpful aren't.
But maybe you could picture yourself six months from now
starting something really exciting. You are looking forward to the workday.
You really enjoy getting to know your colleagues. You have
coffee with one during which you are telling the story

(02:42):
of all the ridiculousness that happened before you and this
organization met each other. Everyone is hanging on to the
story because the hero's struggles make the plot so much better.
That is what you are going through now. I know
this is just a mental trick, but it really does help.

(03:08):
In retrospect, things can seem inevitable, but there was always
a moment when it wasn't. In the best stories, things
weren't inevitable, the hero had to keep going, forging on,
ultimately emerging victorious. So if you are going through something

(03:30):
rough right now, picture yourself in the future when the
current problem has been solved. Someday you will be telling
this story. Someday this will be a plot point where
everyone's just waiting to see how the hero will keep
moving forward. But you do and you get to the

(03:53):
happy ending. Knowing that someday you'll be telling this story
can keep you going now. In the meantime, this is Laura.
Thanks for listening, and here's to making the most of
our time. Thanks for listening to Before Breakfast. If you've

(04:19):
got questions, ideas, or feedback, you can reach me at
Laura at Laura vandercam dot com. Before Breakfast is a
production of iHeartMedia. For more podcasts from iHeartMedia, please visit
the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to

(04:41):
your favorite shows.

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Laura Vanderkam

Laura Vanderkam

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