Try something scary

Emotional intensity can stretch the experience of time

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:03):
Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of I Heart Radio.
Good Morning. This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast.
Today's tip is to try something scary. Getting out of
your comfort zone makes time feel more intense and can
even make time appear to move slowly. Given how life

(00:26):
seems to speed by as we get older, that can
be a very good thing. Now. I'm not a particularly
brave person, but from time to time I forced myself
to do something that I think will make a good memory.
My first real roller coaster expedition, Everest in Disney's Animal Kingdom,
happened because my ten year old nephew wanted to go

(00:46):
on it and needed it an adult to go with him.
It turns out roller coasters are quite fun, which makes sense.
Why else would people wait hours in line for rides
if they weren't exciting. I'm quite scared of heights, but
I once went on a zip line tour of the
rainforest Canopy in Nicaragua because well, I was there and
it was certainly going to be a unique way to

(01:08):
see a part of the environment that I could not
see from the ground. Public speaking deserves a category of
its own here. I know it's one of the most
common fears. I grew up wanting to be a writer,
and happily enough, I became one. But I soon realized
that one of the best ways to make a living
as a writer, both in terms of growing your audience
and bringing in income, is to go around talking about

(01:31):
the topic of your book. My first public speaking experiences
were horrific, but I forced myself to keep doing it
because not doing so would limit my potential audience. I
decided to force myself to keep improving as well. The
first time I gave a speech without notes or slides,
I was petrified about how it would go. Hundreds of

(01:53):
people were going to spend forty five minutes staring at
just me. But I did it and felt so much
more connected to the audience that now I rarely use
power point unless my hosts insist on it. Facing our
fears builds resilience and opens up all sorts of opportunities. Now,

(02:13):
I will say that there is a difference between purposefully
getting outside of your comfort zone and doing something unpleasant
just to do so. I know some people believe we
should intentionally do unpleasant things like take cold showers in
order to toughen ourselves up. But I don't think most
people's lives are so easy that they have to artificially

(02:33):
engineer difficult moments just to experience them. Life throws all
sorts of difficult things our way, with or without our consent. Childbirth,
setting in an e er with a sick kid, if
you've calmed yourself through contractions, or through cancer treatments, or
through watching a loved one being wheeled into surgery, I

(02:55):
don't think you need to take cold showers just to
prove you're tough. I'm more talking about trying scary things,
things outside your comfort zone that you suspect will open
up new possibilities. Giving a speech is scary, but it
will advance your career. Lobbying for a promotion is scary,
but if you get it, you'll be able to use

(03:16):
your talents on a bigger stage. If you don't get it,
your company has learned that you want to advance, and
often that nudges you towards the top of the list
for the next time. Traveling solo is scary, but it
means you learn about the world and can go places
even if no one you know is up for the trip.
Learning to swim or serve, for ride a bike as

(03:38):
an adult is scary, but it opens up amazing recreational
opportunities that won't happen if you stay comfortable. And here's
an added benefit. Taking risks builds memories. I've studied how
we perceive time, and one explanation for why time seems
to go faster as we get older is that so

(03:59):
much is just the same over and over again. We
commute to work the same way, We do the same things,
so our brain doesn't bother remembering it. But think back
to high school or college. Didn't those years seem longer
than the past four years of your life. Part of
this is that as a young person, you are figuring

(04:19):
out your life. You put yourself in new situations, and
you learn things as you took risks with first loves,
first jobs, first realizations that the adults around you didn't
actually have everything figured out. You will definitely remember the
first time you give a speech. You will remember the preparation,
the moments before, what the space where you are waiting

(04:42):
looks like. You will remember taking the stage and seeing
so many faces staring at you. None of this disappears
into a memory sinkhole. And while it's difficult. That's a
good thing because life feels more full the more memories
we develop. So what fficult thing will you try and
service of a larger purpose? How will you step outside

(05:05):
your comfort zone? Look for an opportunity this week and
see what happens in the meantime. This is Laura. Thanks
for listening, and here's to making the most of our time. Hey, everybody,
I'd love to hear from you. You can send me

(05:27):
your tips, your questions, or anything else. Just connect with
me on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram at Before Breakfast Pod.
That's b E the number four, then Breakfast p o D.
You can also shoot me an email at Before Breakfast
podcast at i heeart media dot com. That Before Breakfast

(05:47):
is spelled out with all the letters. Thanks so much,
I look forward to staying in touch. Before Breakfast is
a production of I Heart Radio. For more podcasts from
I heart Radio, visit the i heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts,
or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.