Write a gratitude letter

A simple but profound strategy can spread more joy this holiday season

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:03):
Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of I Heart Radio.
Good Morning. This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast.
Today's tip is to write a gratitude letter. Writing this
letter and sharing it with the person you're grateful for
is a good way to make a happier holiday season.

(00:25):
A few episodes ago, I described an exercise from Martin
Seligman's book Flourish about recording what went well each day.
Today's tip about another gratitude practice from Flourish can help
us connect with the people who've made a big difference
in our lives. Seligman proposes writing something called a gratitude letter,

(00:47):
and here's how to do it. First, think about someone
who has been kind to you or who has made
an important impact on your life, but who you haven't
really thanked. Write that person a thank you letter. Describe
what they did and how it has influenced you. Second,
and here's where the practice gets a little unusual. Rather

(01:09):
than sending the letter in the mail hand, deliver the
letter and read it aloud to the person you want
to thank. Now, you may be thinking that this sounds complicated,
especially if the person doesn't live next door, and might
feel a little awkward. Maybe so talking about feelings is hard,
even if they're good feelings. But here's why he suggests it.

(01:32):
By being vulnerable and telling someone what they have meant
to you in person and at length, you are demonstrating
their importance to you and how much you appreciate them.
And just imagine how the person you think is going
to feel. Most likely, he or she will feel happy
and proud to have had such a positive impact on you.

(01:54):
The person will feel honored by your time and your
words and openness, and probably closer to you too. You
might also imagine how you are going to feel grateful
for how that person has influenced your life, connected to them,
and bolstered by all these good feelings. Now. I know
this might sound a bit like common sense that thank

(02:16):
you notes make both writer and recipient feel better, but
as a research psychologist, Seligman did more than just imagine
how writing gratitude letters would make people feel. He and
his colleagues studied the effects and found that writing and
delivering gratitude letters left participants feeling significantly better than a
control group. For a month, those who wrote gratitude letters

(02:38):
reported more happiness and fewer symptoms of depression, and given
how many people can feel out of sorts during the holidays,
I'm a big fan of anything that can make people
happy into the new year. So who do you have
to thank? Maybe it's a teacher or a neighbor you
knew when you were a child, someone who valued you,

(02:58):
understood you, nudge you to follow your dreams. Or perhaps
you'd like to thank a professional mentor who helped you
earlier in your career. Or maybe it's a parent or
aunt or uncle who helped you during your early days
of parenting. Or maybe it's a friend who offered you
counsel during a difficult time. So today, try writing down
the names of the people in your life you are

(03:20):
most grateful for. Linger over this list, take a moment
to recall specific memories with each person, consider how they
impacted you. Then choose one of these people to thank.
Write a letter sharing your memories, describing what the person
meant to you, and expressing your gratitude. Then make a

(03:41):
visit to read your letter and say thank you in person.
You may feel so good after your visit that you'll
decide to write gratitude letters to the other people on
your list as well. If you do this writing and
delivering a gratitude letter. Let me know how it goes
for you and the person you think. You can email
me at Before Breakfast podcast at iHeart media dot com.

(04:04):
In the meantime, this is Laura. Thanks for listening and
here's to making the most of our time. Hey, everybody,
I'd love to hear from you. You can send me
your tips, your questions, or anything else. Just connect with
me on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram at Before Breakfast pod

(04:28):
that's b E the number four, then Breakfast p o D.
You can also shoot me an email at Before Breakfast
podcast at i heeart media dot com. That Before Breakfast
is spelled out with all the letters. Thanks so much,
I look forward to staying in touch. Before Breakfast is

(04:51):
a production of I Heart Radio. For more podcasts from
my heart Radio, visit the i heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts,
or wherever you listen to your favorite chips.