You don't have to pick up the ball

If someone else started the project, they can take the initiative to keep it going

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:03):
Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of iHeartRadio. Good Morning.
This is Laura, Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. Today's
tip is that you don't have to pick up every
dropped ball. I know that the people who listen to

(00:23):
Before Breakfast are conscientious and productive, and it can be
utterly maddening to watch other people drop the ball. A
colleague has offered to plan a baby shower for a
team member, and the due date keeps getting closer with
no indication that anything has been planned. Or maybe you

(00:43):
have a high schooler who doesn't want you to register
him for the SAT, but has not taken any steps
to do that himself. Maybe a local nonprofit board chair
has insisted you need a summer meeting, but she has
not scheduled it and it is almost Labor Day. Your
neighbor asked about borrowing your powerwasher. You said yes, you

(01:05):
moved it to your porch and there it sits. In
moments like these, conscientious people often feel tempted to swoop
in to pick up the drop ball and save the day.
You scramble to plan a baby shower last minute, you
write to the board chair to suggest dates. You walk

(01:25):
your powerwasher over to your neighbors, and sometimes picking up
a dropped ball is the right thing to do. I mean,
you probably don't want to let your kid delay taking
the SAT too long if you're pretty sure he does
hope to go to college. You want your team member
to have a baby shower, and so you might decide
to plan the shower as your colleague, who you know

(01:48):
is less busy than you, makes noises about how everything
has just been so busy. And sometimes you pick up
the ball because it's going to land back in your
court anyway, and the later it does, the more frantic
everything will be. If your boss wants you to create
some charts for his presentation and he hasn't gotten you

(02:11):
the data, sadly, you probably do need to follow up
so he doesn't drop this in your lap the night
before his presentation when you have a million other things
going on. But you don't always have to pick up
the ball. If it is not going to be much
bothered to you one way or another, you can just

(02:34):
let it ride. If your neighbor hasn't come by in
a week, just put the powerwasher back in the garage.
Your neighbor can knock on your door or text you
when they're on the way, and you will deal with
it then if it is convenient. In some cases, you
can float a test balloon. A friend who hasn't responded

(02:55):
to dates you suggested for getting together can be nudged
with a message sking if she had other dates in mind.
But eventually you have to let the other person decide
to deal with it or not. Indeed, sometimes you can
deliberately put the ball back in someone's court to decide
if they are serious or not. If you have this

(03:18):
sort of job where a lot of people want to
pick your brain or do informational interviews about your industry,
you can ask the person requesting a meeting to first
send you a list of questions so you can prepare.
If the person does, great, you could schedule a meeting.
But if they drop the ball, well good you found

(03:39):
out before you spent thirty minutes with them or tried
to do a professional favor for someone who wasn't actually
that excited about it in the first place, especially when
the other person made the request or initiated planning. If
they drop the ball, you may not need to pick
it up. You can assume that when it's a priority

(04:00):
for them, they will get back to it, and you
don't need to take responsibility for it in the meantime.
In the meantime, this is Laura. Thanks for listening, and
here's to making the most of our time. Thanks for

(04:23):
listening to Before Breakfast. If you've got questions, ideas, or feedback,
you can reach me at Laura at Laura vandercam dot com.
Before Breakfast is a production of iHeartMedia. For more podcasts
from iHeartMedia, please visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or

(04:47):
wherever you listen to your favorite shows.