February 10, 2024 • 34 mins
Whether you celebrate Galentine's Day, Valentine's Day, Singles Awareness Day, or none of the above, Anney and Samantha have you covered with a chocolate box of history, traditions and Vinegar Valentine's in this classic episode. Will you be our Galentine?
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:05):
Hey, this is Anny and Smantha.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
And welcome to Stuff. I've Never told you.
Speaker 3 (00:08):
Protection by Heart Radio, and today we were bringing back
one that I.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
Had a lot of fun with. I think you had
fun with, Samantha, but it was one we did.
Speaker 3 (00:25):
Admittedly I would not find this funny now, but we
did about salty Valentines, this history of giving really mean
cruel valencines.
Speaker 1 (00:36):
Oh, that was one of the first introductions to this show.
I was I like this, let's go.
Speaker 3 (00:40):
Yes, it was a very fascinating one. You can find
a lot of images should you choose to do so,
but we haven't reran it. So since we're getting into
a Valentine's Day territory, we thought we would bring it back,
So please enjoy this classic episode. Hey, this is Annie
(01:04):
and Samantha and welcome to Stuff.
Speaker 2 (01:05):
I've Never told you.
Speaker 3 (01:06):
A production of Iheartmedia' is how stuff works. As this
episode comes out, it is Valentine's Day surrounded by Singles
Awareness Day, Galentine's Day, whatever you celebrate it, don't celebrate
(01:26):
on February fourteenth Mistress Day. Apparently Mistress Day. That seems sexist,
Yeah it does. We might get into that a little
bit later. If you're listening to this today, it comes
out Samantha and I are in LA and we might
be doing our own sort of Galentine's Day.
Speaker 1 (01:44):
Though it's gonna be a full thing.
Speaker 2 (01:45):
It's gonna be a full.
Speaker 4 (01:47):
The Gallantines and Valentine celebrating single, all of that thing.
Speaker 1 (01:51):
We're going to do all of them.
Speaker 5 (01:52):
Okay, perfect, Yes, all the boxes, all of the boxes,
and hopefully we might have a coffee times with other
gal yeah, or those who I did not ask.
Speaker 3 (02:02):
Come and celebrate or just what to hang with. Yeah,
totally trigger warning. A brief mentions of violence against women
in this one.
Speaker 2 (02:11):
And this one.
Speaker 3 (02:12):
Actually came to my mind because I learned about dating
Sunday for the first time here in the United States
at least, which is apparently a new Year's resolution post
holiday breakup thing and maybe like you're still single, questions
that you got over the holidays, or omg, Valentine's Day
is coming around the corner one of those or a
(02:33):
combination of those reasons that results in a bunch of
people signing up for dating apps. The first Sunday of
the new year is the busiest day of the year
for dating apps.
Speaker 2 (02:43):
Do you know about this year.
Speaker 4 (02:44):
Yes, I did, and I purposely stayed away from January
all the way through March when I was on the
dating sites because of that.
Speaker 1 (02:52):
I will not be a statistic. You are so much
more than a statistic to me, is amanth.
Speaker 4 (02:57):
I do know that there's also a tradition for New Year,
or do you know how people do things that if
you'll wear pink underwear that's supposed to usher your new
lovers or something.
Speaker 2 (03:05):
I have not heard that.
Speaker 1 (03:07):
Yeah, I've heard that. Okay, well I did it.
Speaker 3 (03:10):
Sure you did it or didn't, It doesn't matter either way.
Some apps see an increase of new users up to
eighty percent. And one of the ways I learned about
this is I got asked out a lot in January
and it made me stop and think, something is happening here,
Something is not right, And now I know it is.
(03:33):
I was part of the statistics. You were in some ways,
so you were on the apps, right, No, No, I was.
Speaker 2 (03:39):
Just getting asked out.
Speaker 3 (03:40):
As I've said before, I do have a very long
history of dating people born on or near Valentine's State.
Speaker 2 (03:45):
That has also given me pause. And a lot of
my friends.
Speaker 3 (03:49):
Are born around this time, right, I don't believe in astrology,
but I'm like, huh, interesting.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
Those are the types of people. Huh.
Speaker 3 (03:55):
Yes, Samantha and I we were discussing what our schools
used to do for Valentine's Day, like, you know, primary
school and I was in elementary school. We would make
these little decorated shoeboxes with slots for Valentine's cards, and
you just would sort of sit around awkwardly and hope
that you got one after you'd given years out. And
(04:17):
I hope that the one you got wasn't mean, because
I got some mean ones.
Speaker 1 (04:21):
Really, yes, I did. It's so weird.
Speaker 3 (04:23):
You didn't have this experience, no, geez, well I did.
And we went to school nearish each.
Speaker 1 (04:29):
Other, nearish, different timeframes.
Speaker 2 (04:32):
That's true, But you'd think it would improve over time and.
Speaker 1 (04:35):
Not get more. Right. Apparently y'all got meaner. I don't know.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
We mean.
Speaker 1 (04:40):
You have a picture of your face with a bunch
of pimples on it.
Speaker 4 (04:42):
Wow, Oh my gosh, what Yes, that's elaborate.
Speaker 1 (04:46):
Oh I'm a main girl. Elaborate Stephen. I haven't forgotten
Steven's but I got I got back.
Speaker 3 (04:52):
Later in high school, we had this thing where you
could pay a dollar to send either white think our
red rose anonymously. White represented friendship, Pink represented a crush.
I think and read represented love. But of course my
friends and I all hijacked it and we sent each
other flowers from secreted miners.
Speaker 2 (05:13):
It was great.
Speaker 3 (05:15):
My mom would always make me these paper roses every
year I have when I saved them. I'm a very
sentimental person, and my dad would get me a chocolate
from our local chocolate maker. So it was like a
grab bag of some bad things but.
Speaker 2 (05:28):
Some good things.
Speaker 1 (05:28):
Wow.
Speaker 4 (05:29):
I guess you guys did a lot more. Maybe my
school just did not care as much. We definitely did
the bio ros whatever do with those things. It wasn't
different colors to represent anything a b We were never mean.
I mean, I think for our school we did the
little dinky shoe boxes as well, but everybody brought everyone
(05:49):
of Valentine and you won if there was a piece
of candy on it. That's how you knew you were liked,
kind of if you got more candy or whatever whatnot.
Of course, we would also have the one where they
would send deliveries individual kids and such, and I remember
specifically that I had to have a boyfriend the third
(06:09):
grade because for the like I'm never, I was like,
I'm no. It was fifth grade and I was determined
to have someone deliver something to me.
Speaker 1 (06:16):
I love it.
Speaker 4 (06:17):
I know I was very manipulative, but to be fair,
I got him a really great thing too, And I'm
sure I think included one of those pencils with the
heart that breaks.
Speaker 1 (06:25):
Oh yeah, be mine or whatever.
Speaker 4 (06:28):
Right, So, I mean we gave each other gifts, but yeah, no,
never any mean ones I never saw. Maybe you were
just nicer, or maybe I just never noticed.
Speaker 2 (06:39):
Yeah you things kind of been going on.
Speaker 4 (06:41):
Maybe I just didn't know my friends were nicer than
your friends. I don't know, oh how friends. But I
will say I also get a box of chocolates even
to this day, every year from my father, and that's
one of the things that he loves to do, is
give my sister and I a box of chocolates, and
even with me being not home, he mels.
Speaker 1 (07:00):
It and usually like prioritizes it.
Speaker 4 (07:02):
You know, that has to be one day shipping all
these scenes something from Walmwater Target or something.
Speaker 2 (07:09):
Okay, yeah, well it should be coming any day.
Speaker 4 (07:12):
Now.
Speaker 2 (07:12):
I'm around, I'm available.
Speaker 1 (07:14):
Okay's just saying, okay, all right.
Speaker 3 (07:16):
Well we're doing a kind of basic, very brief history
of Valentine's is actually fascinating. But before that overview, Valentine's
Day is a holiday that takes place on February fourteenth,
all about love and expressing your love, usually through things
like cards, flowers, and candy.
Speaker 2 (07:32):
Yes, it is a big business.
Speaker 3 (07:35):
In twenty ten, people spent around eighteen point six billion
dollars on Valentine's Day.
Speaker 4 (07:41):
And these days Valentine's Day is a great way for
companies and corporations to perpetuate heterodating and gender stereotypes. Women
love chocolate, right, No, but it wasn't always a holiday
about love, No, it was so. With a brief history
of Valentine's Day, No one's entirely sure where Valentine came from,
but one popular theory goes all the way back to
(08:03):
the ancient Roman celebration of Lupercalia from February thirteenth to
the fifteenth. This festival call for men, who, surprise, were
usually drunk and naked, to sacrifice a goat and a dog.
How dare you? Then they would skin these animals and
whip women with the skin. Delightful, What a great celebration.
The women believed this ritual helped with fertility. There was
(08:25):
a matchmaking aspect as well. Men would draw the names
of women out of jars and the couple would go
off and have lots of sex for the rest of
the festival, and if they hit it off, they might
even stay together.
Speaker 3 (08:36):
This sounds sort of like I just finished the Newest
Thing of Sabrina, The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina. I feel
like a couple of seasons back they had this.
Speaker 4 (08:45):
They did they had the worship being whatever, and they
paired with each other.
Speaker 3 (08:50):
You're supposed to have sex all night or something or something.
It didn't happen that way, But not for Sabrina. Yeah,
other people, who knows, not for Sabrina. As for the
name Valentine's, during the third century CE, Roman emperor Claudius
had two men named Valentine executed via decapitation on February
fourteenth on two separate years, possibly because they were Christians.
(09:11):
The first man, Father Valentinus, ended up arrested and in
servitude of a well off man named Asterius. Father Valentinus
kept espousing the power of Christianity and Hysterius told him, Look,
if you can get rid of my foster daughter's blindness,
you will make a believer out of me. So the
father covered the girl's eyes with his hands and recited,
Lord Jesus Christ, enlighten your handmaid, because you are God,
(09:33):
the true light, and the legend goes.
Speaker 2 (09:35):
She regained her sight.
Speaker 3 (09:36):
Mysterius converted, along with his entire family, but getting wind
of this, the emperor ordered them all to be executed.
The second Valentine to be executed had an extremely similar story,
and of so scholars suspect they're probably the same person,
just with two different names and slightly different details. Nevertheless,
(09:56):
the Catholic Church later honored their martyrdom with St.
Speaker 2 (10:00):
Valentine's Day.
Speaker 3 (10:01):
Several churches throughout Europe claim to have pieces of Saint
Valentine's skull.
Speaker 2 (10:05):
One place even claims to have the whole thing.
Speaker 3 (10:08):
If you're curious about where this information comes from, because
I was there was a I guess he was a priest.
He went around collecting stories for all of these saints
and compiled them into one book. So if you're ever
curious about a saint, then check it out. In the
(10:30):
eleventh century, a priest claiming to have Saint Valentine's head
used it to cure a whole laundry list of things,
including demonic possession and to prevent fires and epidemics.
Speaker 1 (10:40):
Oh we need that today, we do.
Speaker 2 (10:42):
I wonder where it is. I wonder that's the new Indiana.
Speaker 1 (10:46):
Jonas getting her bed.
Speaker 2 (10:47):
I mean, come on there.
Speaker 3 (10:48):
It is a lot of media has romanticized the story
of Valentine, that he wrote love letters in jail or
performed marriages in jail, but there's no real historical evidence.
Speaker 2 (10:57):
To back that up. What we have is on shaky
enough ground.
Speaker 4 (11:01):
Speaking of the Catholic charge, in an attempt to due
away with pagan festivals, they combined Valentine's Day with Librecalia
in fifth century CE. But it was still pretty much
a day about getting drunk and fertility, but now with
clothes on, because you know Christians, right, that's the way
you got to do it. In parallel, there was Gallanton's Day,
a holiday observed by the Normans.
Speaker 1 (11:21):
Gallanton meant lover of women.
Speaker 4 (11:24):
Because the names are similar, It's likely they got combined
at some point in time.
Speaker 3 (11:28):
Right, and then, with the help of artists like Shakespeare Ofhilia,
describes herself as hamlets Valentine and Shaucer, who wrote a
February as the seasoned birdsmate Tauru. Romantic Valentine's Day was
romanticized and popularized throughout Europe. By the Middle Ages, handmade
paper cards had become a part of this tradition. The
French Duke of Orleans described his wife as his quote
(11:51):
very gentle Valentine in a letter he wrote to her
in February fourteen fifteen. Sweets became a part of it,
to getting something sweet for someone you thought was sweet.
Speaker 1 (12:00):
Oh, so I need to get you something sweet.
Speaker 2 (12:02):
Oh you think I'm sweets?
Speaker 1 (12:03):
Oh you know I do. So.
Speaker 4 (12:05):
From Europe, this holiday spread, eventually making its way to
the New World. Nineteenth century industrialization added mass produced, factory
made cards to the mix, and in nineteen thirteen a
little coupling you may have heard of, oh, I don't know,
called Hallmark. Hallmark Cards started making cards in Kansas City, Missouri.
Speaker 3 (12:23):
Right and from there you can imagine, oh, the birth
of cards. So yeah, well, they were very instrumental in
popularizing a lot of the holidays we celebrate.
Speaker 1 (12:33):
Because that's their bread and butter.
Speaker 3 (12:35):
Why you gotta get a card for this holiday in
the card exactly, but not all cards.
Speaker 1 (12:42):
We were nice.
Speaker 2 (12:44):
And we're going to get into that.
Speaker 3 (12:46):
But first we're gonna fall for a quick break for
word from our sponsor. And we're back, Thank you, sponsor,
And we're back with something I actually learned about. I
(13:07):
remember the precise moment I learned about this over on
our other show that my other show that I do
is Samantha. You should just come along and be part
of it. We Savor, which is all about food and drink.
We did an episode for Valentine's Day on Sweethearts, the
candy yes, with the messages, and I somehow found this
(13:27):
thing about giving people mean sweethearts. And from there I
found this old tradition of giving people vinegar Valentine.
Speaker 4 (13:37):
And you told me about this, and I had no
clue that was a thing. I'm still kind of baffled. Oh,
even though we've been researching it, I'm still baffled.
Speaker 3 (13:45):
Oh it's baffling. Actually, it makes perfect sense in a
weird way.
Speaker 2 (13:49):
And I'm going to bring it all together to.
Speaker 4 (13:51):
Be fair, though I feel like I would be. This
is probably my type of Valentine anyway, Lord.
Speaker 3 (13:57):
It probably is so This is something that I'm i
is hilarious, but I'm also really glad it's a thing of.
Speaker 2 (14:04):
The past because they're pretty mean, and we're going to
do some examples.
Speaker 3 (14:08):
But so vinegar Valentine's were previously called mocking insulting. Our
comic vinegar is actually something that we call them modernly.
That's not what they were called back then. And this
was the practice from about the eighteen forties to nineteen
forties that was particularly popular in the United States and
the UK of giving people a mean or cool card,
usually with a crude caricature, almost always anonymously. Oh even
(14:32):
when folks made their own Valentines before there was a
commercialization of cards, they made these vinegar versions.
Speaker 2 (14:39):
They made homemade vinegar versions.
Speaker 3 (14:41):
I guess that's what I was getting in elementary school.
But the commercialization of cards took that and ran with it.
Speaker 2 (14:48):
They made them.
Speaker 3 (14:50):
People would buy these cards for about a penny or
sometimes more for a fancy one, and they could get
pretty fancy and send them through the mail, again anonymously
to add insult to in the person receiving the vinegar
valentine usually had.
Speaker 1 (15:03):
To pay for postage.
Speaker 3 (15:06):
They had to pay for it It could be someone
you secretly despise, or it could be a not so
nice way to tell a suitor you were not that
into them.
Speaker 2 (15:14):
That was a really popular one. We should do these,
I don't think so. I don't think so.
Speaker 3 (15:20):
You could send one to a couple you didn't like,
or if they were doing PDA you didn't like, you
could send that. You could strongly advise them to change
their behavior. There A lot of them are threatening in nature,
like change your ways or else. Millions of these millions
were printed. If you think about it as I have,
(15:41):
they were sort of an early example of trolling.
Speaker 1 (15:44):
It really is.
Speaker 3 (15:45):
It's like we complain about social media today and how
terrible people are, but we've been terrible apparently as long
as we.
Speaker 2 (15:52):
Can be anonymous.
Speaker 3 (15:55):
Yeah, Because if you didn't want to say something to
someone's face.
Speaker 2 (15:59):
Here here was a great way to do it.
Speaker 3 (16:00):
And you could get them for just about anything or anyone.
Speaker 2 (16:05):
They get so specific.
Speaker 3 (16:07):
At one time, these cards accounted for half of all
Valentine's sales, not just cards sales in the United States.
Speaker 5 (16:16):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (16:17):
Yeah, the power of anonymity, I guess. Yes.
Speaker 3 (16:20):
So we do want to have we want to go
through some examples.
Speaker 1 (16:22):
Oh yeah, these are fine.
Speaker 4 (16:23):
So there's one this image that shows a woman handing
a man a lemon, and the caption reads, to my Valentine,
'tis a limon I hand you? Now skadoo? Because I
love another there's no chance for you. Also, I would
like to say all of these have great words that
we never use anymore, such as skadoo, and I think
(16:44):
I would need to bring them back.
Speaker 1 (16:45):
You need the chance Atlantic accent. Oh yeah, I know,
I don't do that.
Speaker 2 (16:48):
Well, I mean, we'll see how it goes.
Speaker 3 (16:51):
There's one of a woman dumping a bucket of water
on a man's head that reads, here's a pretty cool reception.
At least you'll say, there's no exception. It's just as
plain as it can say, old fellow, you best step away.
Speaker 1 (17:04):
That may be something you should do now, I know.
Speaker 4 (17:08):
Another one shows a snake in a suit on and
a top hat, and then there's a woman looking on
in the fear in the background, and the caption goes,
I'm not attracted by your glitter for well, I know
how very bitter my life would be if I should
take you for my spouse.
Speaker 1 (17:22):
A rattlesnake.
Speaker 4 (17:23):
Oh no, I'd not accept the ring or evermore twould
prove us sting.
Speaker 3 (17:27):
Oh also, I think that snake had a monocle. Just
want to add that in That.
Speaker 1 (17:31):
Probably sounds about right.
Speaker 2 (17:32):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (17:33):
Another depicts a man about to kiss a donkey with
the message, Hey, lover boy, the place for you is
home upon the shelf, because the only one who'd kiss
you is.
Speaker 1 (17:41):
A jackass like yourself.
Speaker 3 (17:44):
Or this titled bald Head, Your bright shining pate is
seen at all shows and invariably down in the bald
headed rose, where you make conspicuous by your tender care.
Speaker 2 (17:56):
Your true ardent love for one onesome hair.
Speaker 1 (17:59):
Oh so mean, no one's superman.
Speaker 4 (18:02):
So several were moral based about PDA or alcoholism.
Speaker 1 (18:06):
Or this one called television bug.
Speaker 4 (18:09):
It says at faces that are televised all day and night,
you stare, but if.
Speaker 1 (18:13):
They saw your stupid mug, they'd all go off the air.
Oh my gosh, I love the rhyme. Not gonna lie.
Speaker 2 (18:18):
The rhymes are fun. Yeah uh. And these cars got down.
Speaker 1 (18:21):
To the occupation specific.
Speaker 3 (18:23):
If you had a sales lady you didn't like, there's
a vinegar valentine that had you covered like this one.
Saleslady as you wait upon the women with discuss upon
your face. The way you snap and bark at them,
one would think you owned the place. Oho, if you
weren't a fan of your physician. There was a character
named doctor Shirdeath. You could even send one to the
(18:44):
postman who delivered the note. They were very big during
the Civil War. TiO one shows a woman with a
large skull for a head carrying a chainsaw. The caption
reads to the surgeon, ho, ho old saw bones, here
you come. Yes, when the rebels whack as you are
always ready with your traps to mangle saw and hack us.
Speaker 2 (19:06):
Oh.
Speaker 4 (19:07):
There was a whole category of cars meant to masculate
men who had babies on their lap as being hen pecked,
which is also a great word, but not good.
Speaker 1 (19:14):
No, But at the same time it's an old school word.
It's ridiculous.
Speaker 2 (19:18):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (19:18):
And then the old maid from eighteen ninety four, 'tis
all in vain your simpering looks. You never can incline
with all of your bustles, stay in curls to find
a Valentine.
Speaker 3 (19:28):
And this one she's caught a poor cat and a bird,
but she can't snare a man. So we've heard see
old maid's sad fate to lose out on a mate
and take tea.
Speaker 2 (19:37):
But sh not a.
Speaker 3 (19:38):
Word or this one. You've got more curves than a
roller coaster. Your clothes fit like a glove. There's one
thing wrong, glamour puss. You've a face only a mother
would love.
Speaker 4 (19:50):
So many depicted women in unfeminine ways, miss nosy and
image of a woman with a large nose that reads
on account of your talk of others affairs at most dances,
you sit warming the chairs because of the k you
take to attend to all others business.
Speaker 3 (20:04):
You have a a friend and speaking of unfeminine women's
suffrage ushered in a whole new wave of vinegar Valentine's
aimed at women fighting for the right to vote, Like this,
your vote for me, you will not get. I don't
want a preaching suffragette. These cards typically portrayed suffragettes as
ugly and often violent. Some women sent Valentine's to a
(20:27):
sure would be suitors that they weren't like those suffragists
reading in these wild days of suffragette dreys. I'm sure
you'd never overlook a girl who can't be militant. But
simply loves to cook, okay, but there were pro suffragette
Valentine's as well, So you.
Speaker 4 (20:45):
Know, it's kind of like the feminists and anti feminists today,
and it's just in Twitter.
Speaker 2 (20:51):
Exactly exactly.
Speaker 3 (20:54):
These cards, while popular, were certainly not universally well liked,
and it's hard to say how many were jokes how
many were totally serious. An eighteen ninety five article from
the Kindergarten Primary magazine lamented the detrimental effects these cars
had on children, calling on teachers to quote make it
a day for kind remembrance than a day for wrecking revenge.
(21:15):
One post office in Chicago held over twenty five thousand Valentines,
deeming some of the cards to Vulgart to send. But
there are historical examples of people getting murdered or taking
their own lives over vinegar Valentine.
Speaker 1 (21:30):
So it's a bullying tactic.
Speaker 2 (21:32):
It is. It absolutely is.
Speaker 4 (21:33):
Again, these are funny to read right now, but plenty
were super sexist and racist and fat phobic, and some
advise people to kill themselves. Really, if you think of
comment boards and Twitter fees, you doue comments. In some
ways this is still going on, actually in a lot
of ways. Yeah, going on, and people have always been terrible.
And again, the world is burning.
Speaker 2 (21:55):
Sminty, the world is burning.
Speaker 1 (21:57):
That's our tackling.
Speaker 4 (21:58):
Oh so wow, yeah, Vinegar Valentine's I never knew it
was such a thing.
Speaker 3 (22:03):
I would recommend looking it up just to see the
imagery in a lot of them.
Speaker 4 (22:09):
Oh god, oh my, that sounds disheartening. Yes, but maybe
we should go on to a bitter better We're not bitter, yes,
better topics.
Speaker 1 (22:18):
Such as Gallentine's Day.
Speaker 2 (22:20):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (22:20):
So the actual name and celebration was first on Parks
and rec episode that aired on February eleventh, twenty ten.
Speaker 1 (22:27):
Also should be noted that it was written by a man.
Oh yes, so.
Speaker 4 (22:31):
In the episode, we see one of my faves, Amy Poehler,
celebrating with her gal pals with brunch and plenty of
kitschy presents and gifts, and as Leslie explained it, every
February thirteenth, my lady friends and I leave our husbands
and our boyfriends at home and we just come and
kick it breakfast style ladies celebrating ladies. It's like the
Lilith Fair minus the eighths plus for tatas and waffles.
Speaker 1 (22:53):
And waffles, of course the waffles.
Speaker 3 (22:54):
Yeah, as defined by Urban Dictionary, February thirteenth, The other
half of Valentine's Day, when you celebrate your love for
your lady friends single r. No, Hey, Judy, you're such
a great friend to me, and I want to celebrate
our friend love, not only my sexy love with my
boyfriend Marvin tomorrow. So let's have a dinner and get
together the day before Valentine's Day. Gallantine's Day, sexy love,
(23:16):
sexy love, yes, friend love and sexy love yeah.
Speaker 1 (23:18):
No, you got to differentiate.
Speaker 4 (23:20):
So if you have seen the show, and most likely
if a friend of yours have seen the show, then
you know that, yes, this is a maid of holiday.
But the success of it has made some great commercial success,
whether from different products being marketed towards the holiday or
from the sheer amount of publicity written in reference to
said holiday.
Speaker 3 (23:36):
Yes, one thing as part of our jobs. And you
might not get this a lot yet, Samanthah, but you
will is cold emails from pr companies, and I have
probably gotten at least thirty about Galentine's Day and what
I should be doing on Galentine's Day and what I
should buy my gal Pal friends. So definitely companies have
capitalized on it. And also, as I said before, it
(24:00):
wasn't an official day.
Speaker 2 (24:01):
But I feel like a lot of.
Speaker 3 (24:02):
Us we've been doing something like this right for a
long time. We just didn't call it this, and we
didn't have all the kind of traditions. Even though it's new,
there's kind of a set here's what you do exactly.
Speaker 1 (24:13):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (24:14):
Spreading wide enough, it has spawned books, articles both arguing
for and against. As New York Post writer Haley Eber
stated in her twenty seventeen column celebrating female friendship is great,
but tying it to Valentine's Day reeks of an opportunistic
marketing ploy, stating she felt it was being used as
only a marketing ploy, in that February thirteenth had once
(24:35):
been referred to as Mistress Day, again for cheeters to
take their side pieces, as she states, out for private celebration.
Speaker 4 (24:43):
Perhaps it could be stated that Valentines was the answer
to the long appropriated idea that Valentine's was single awareness day.
Side note, there seems to be a whole lot of feelings,
whether it's love, loneliness, or defensiveness, just a whole lot
of emotion around this month, right, And again speaking of
a single Awareness Day, this was created in two thousand
and five with the idea that for too long, February
(25:05):
fourteenth was SAD, which is the acronym for Single Awareness
Day in a negative and so taking it back and
celebrating being single and being aware of that day, I
guess is on the fifties to celebrate one's own singleness
if you happen to be single.
Speaker 3 (25:20):
Right, And when I was in college, me and a
big group of my female friends would do Single Awareness
Day SAD, but we would kind of do it like ironically,
like we were single, right, but we weren't sad.
Speaker 2 (25:30):
We were super happy. We would kind of joke about it.
Speaker 1 (25:33):
Yes, it's a celebration of I don't need no persons.
Speaker 3 (25:36):
Yeah yeah, and then we would always like, really do
it up.
Speaker 2 (25:40):
It was really fun.
Speaker 3 (25:43):
And of course it should be noted that there are
several other days created before Gallentine's Day, such as International
Day of Friendship, created by the UN and World Friendship
Crusade in nineteen fifty eight and celebrated on July thirtieth,
although most countries celebrate on the first Sunday, in August.
Speaker 2 (26:00):
And by the way, in nineteen ninety eight, Winnie.
Speaker 3 (26:03):
The Pooh but you didn't know apparently I didn't know,
was appointed as the Ambassador of Friendship by the UN.
Speaker 2 (26:10):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (26:10):
Also of note, National Friendship Day was created by Hallmark
in nineteen nineteen, but apparently went away in the nineteen forties.
Speaker 2 (26:16):
I guess they didn't sell enough card maybe not, maybe not.
Speaker 3 (26:20):
And yeah, I actually I had a brain freeze and
forgot who Winny of the Woo was.
Speaker 1 (26:23):
It's all okay, I did know who you were.
Speaker 2 (26:25):
Now you know, Now I know.
Speaker 3 (26:28):
And we did want to talk about some traditions around
the world. But first we're going to pause for one
more quick pick for a word from our sponsor, and
(26:49):
we're back.
Speaker 2 (26:49):
Thank you sponsor.
Speaker 3 (26:50):
And yeah, we did want to talk about some traditions
from elsewhere.
Speaker 4 (26:54):
Yeah, and you know, we would love to hear about
traditions from other countries. So please let us know if
you're in a different country, or even if you have
different types of traditions, let us know. Because apparently in
Denmark men give women something called a joking letter.
Speaker 1 (27:07):
Traditionally. I'm as assuming anyone can do it.
Speaker 4 (27:10):
Yeah, the letter has a funny joke or rhyme signed
only with a series of dots like dot dot dot.
Speaker 3 (27:17):
I think, yeah, I think maybe I was thinking Morse code.
Speaker 2 (27:20):
But see this is.
Speaker 4 (27:23):
So if the receiver can figure out who the author is,
they get an easter egg when the holiday rolls around.
Speaker 1 (27:29):
What Yeah, huh, I wonder if that's really true?
Speaker 4 (27:32):
Please write it so you get an easter egg if
you Yeah, but you have to wait, you have that
long to figure out who it is. Probably is Morse code,
because I wouldn't imagine what an asterisk would be a
hint of sorts.
Speaker 2 (27:46):
Yeah, and I do feel like I could be totally wrong.
Speaker 4 (27:50):
So I feel like this tradition, we're gonna need to
know some answer we need we.
Speaker 2 (27:54):
Have questions that need answer.
Speaker 3 (27:57):
At one time, the French participated in something called the
more drawing for love.
Speaker 2 (28:02):
It sort of.
Speaker 3 (28:03):
Sounds like choosing a kickball team or something. Men and
women would separate and then call each other's names out
and they would couple up. The men, of course, could
choose another woman if they didn't like the one who
they ended up with, and the unmatched women would go
have a bonfire together, hurling insults and swears to men
who had wrong them, burning the pictures of those men.
(28:23):
This holiday got so out of hand the French government
stepped in and banned it. In England, there used to
be a tradition of women putting bay leaves under their
bed the night before Valentine's Day, one at each corner
and the center to dream of their future husbands. You
can check out the episode we did on bay leaves
ever at Savor for more on that, and we also
(28:45):
talked about South Korea's Black Day on April fourteenth, which
is a day where singles eat black foods.
Speaker 2 (28:50):
Too mourned their single status. But being single is great, y'all.
It's all good.
Speaker 1 (28:55):
Hey, I'll eat food.
Speaker 2 (28:58):
Yeah, I from what I understand again, listeners right in.
Speaker 3 (29:01):
It's also sort of ironic, like I don't think I
don't think.
Speaker 2 (29:07):
People are really upset about it, but I could be wrong.
Speaker 3 (29:09):
So we would love to hear from anybody who knows
there are black food.
Speaker 2 (29:14):
So we did it.
Speaker 3 (29:14):
And in our Savor episode we talked about we were
talking about cuttlefish ink and so things just.
Speaker 2 (29:19):
Die like it could be anything. Noodles.
Speaker 3 (29:21):
I think noodles is traditional, but like the outside of
tumblings or cupcakes all.
Speaker 4 (29:26):
Ridings or kin have the black Hamburger or whatever, and.
Speaker 2 (29:31):
We also talked about that.
Speaker 4 (29:32):
Oh okay, yes, so I need to go listen to
that episode right now.
Speaker 3 (29:36):
You do, you'll learn a lot and we would love
to learn a lot from you listeners, as we always do,
and we do have some listener male for this one,
starting with Mikhayla. She wrote, Hey, y'all, I loved your
two parter on female revengers, particularly because I'm currently in
a production of Shakespeare's Titus Andronicus, featuring one of the
most intense here's my bias showing female revengers to more
(29:59):
at Queen of the Gow. Yes, as an actor, villains
are forever juicy to play, but Tamora Tamora has been
a mind job and a challenge unlike anything I face
to date the story if you're not savvy. After losing
a ten year war against Rome, she her three sons,
and a mercenary, her secret lover Aaron the More are
dragged to Rome as trophies. Her firstborn son is chosen
(30:19):
for sacrifice by way of a right by the titular
character Titus. She begs she appeals to him as a
parent but he does not relent, and her son is
needlessly buy us again slaughtered. By this, she is forever
altered and irreversibly damaged, and bent on revenge. Of epic proportions,
she is elevated to Empress Yes in the same scene,
her son was murdered, and she reclaims a status that
(30:42):
will assist her in gaining vengeance, and.
Speaker 2 (30:44):
Boy howdy does she.
Speaker 3 (30:45):
She aids and abets the mutilation and rape of Titus's daughter,
as well as the murder of the daughter's new husband,
frames two of his sons for said murder, and attempts
to drive Titus and sane with grief. The thing is,
he's already pretty insane. Forty years of war will do
that someone. But he's the victor of war and so
lauded for a service to Rome, so his wild behavior
is mostly allowed, even when he kills one of his
(31:07):
own sons.
Speaker 2 (31:08):
But I digress.
Speaker 3 (31:10):
In the end, she loses her mind and believes she
has trick Titus into something that will finish him and
his remaining family. However, he hasn't actually bought the farm,
and her sons are captured, murdered, and baked into a pie,
which she eats at a banquet. She is then killed
by Titus, and it is pronounced that her body will
be tossed to the animals to feast on as it rots,
because having lived beastly, she will be food for beast
(31:32):
Tamora is a woman in a man's world who, when
she behaves like a man I e. Aggressively, is deemed barbarous,
without womanhood and without grace. Though when Titus and every
other man in the play behaving kind, no eyebrow gets raised,
her sexual prowess is often discussed as a negative, either
as a tool of manipulation or further evidence of her barbarism. Meanwhile,
Titus has begotten twenty six sons of one would have
(31:54):
to imagine twenty six separate women delivered to him upon
his returns from war, because you know, dude's gotta let
off some steam after all that warring. Furthermore, Lavinia, Titus's daughter,
exists to service her father and her husband, and is
literally referred to as an object or property throughout the play.
They are the only two women in the play, and
so the Madonna and the horror dynamic is omnipresent. I
(32:15):
have so much more to say, but I've already said
more than I thought I would, and I hear the
atro music spelling. Just want to make sure my favorite
Shakespearean lady villain got her due.
Speaker 1 (32:24):
Nice.
Speaker 2 (32:25):
I saw that.
Speaker 3 (32:26):
I saw the movie, yeah, when I was a kid
in its.
Speaker 1 (32:31):
Yeah, that could be a little bit horrifying. The pie
the pies.
Speaker 3 (32:36):
Anyway, Whitney wrote, I thought of you both while watching
a movie recently, and how appropriate considering you ass listeners
for movie recommendations. There's a movie out of China called
The Widowed Witch about a woman who survives a factory
explosion which kills her husband. While recovering from this trauma,
she endured in other trauma. She ends up becoming a
traveling shaman. This movie seems to tick off both categories
(32:58):
of somewhat revenge film as well as witch film. Is
also a non white depiction of women practicing magic, perfect, perfect,
well less love recommendations. Yes, we're definitely gonna check that out.
Speaker 1 (33:09):
So we need to know. How are you going to
celebrate February fourteenth or not? You don't have to, I
don't blame you.
Speaker 4 (33:16):
Do you have a unique tradition or how is it
celebrated in your neck of the Woods. If you don't
do Valentine's Day, is there an equivalent.
Speaker 2 (33:22):
Or any of those friendship days?
Speaker 5 (33:24):
Oh?
Speaker 4 (33:24):
Yes, I definitely had a Galentine's tradition for a while.
Speaker 3 (33:28):
Yes, as did I. You can send your stories answers
to our questions. We had many in this episode. Yes,
please don't seen vinegar Valentines unless they're funny.
Speaker 4 (33:39):
Unless I actually would appreciate a good funny one.
Speaker 2 (33:41):
Yeah, a good funny one, that's okay.
Speaker 3 (33:43):
You can email us at Stuff Media, mom Stuff at
iHeartMedia dot com. You can find us on Instagram at
stuff I Never Told You and on Twitter at mom
Stuff Podcast. Thanks as always to our super producer Andrew Howard,
and also.
Speaker 1 (33:56):
Be part of the Galanines.
Speaker 3 (33:58):
We'll allow it, and thanks to you for listening. Stuff
I Never Told You's a protection of iHeartRadio is how
stuff works for more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visits iHeartRadio app,
Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
Hey, this is Anny and Smantha.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
And welcome to Stuff. I've Never told you.
Speaker 3 (00:08):
Protection by Heart Radio, and today we were bringing back
one that I.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
Had a lot of fun with. I think you had
fun with, Samantha, but it was one we did.
Speaker 3 (00:25):
Admittedly I would not find this funny now, but we
did about salty Valentines, this history of giving really mean
cruel valencines.
Speaker 1 (00:36):
Oh, that was one of the first introductions to this show.
I was I like this, let's go.
Speaker 3 (00:40):
Yes, it was a very fascinating one. You can find
a lot of images should you choose to do so,
but we haven't reran it. So since we're getting into
a Valentine's Day territory, we thought we would bring it back,
So please enjoy this classic episode. Hey, this is Annie
(01:04):
and Samantha and welcome to Stuff.
Speaker 2 (01:05):
I've Never told you.
Speaker 3 (01:06):
A production of Iheartmedia' is how stuff works. As this
episode comes out, it is Valentine's Day surrounded by Singles
Awareness Day, Galentine's Day, whatever you celebrate it, don't celebrate
(01:26):
on February fourteenth Mistress Day. Apparently Mistress Day. That seems sexist,
Yeah it does. We might get into that a little
bit later. If you're listening to this today, it comes
out Samantha and I are in LA and we might
be doing our own sort of Galentine's Day.
Speaker 1 (01:44):
Though it's gonna be a full thing.
Speaker 2 (01:45):
It's gonna be a full.
Speaker 4 (01:47):
The Gallantines and Valentine celebrating single, all of that thing.
Speaker 1 (01:51):
We're going to do all of them.
Speaker 5 (01:52):
Okay, perfect, Yes, all the boxes, all of the boxes,
and hopefully we might have a coffee times with other
gal yeah, or those who I did not ask.
Speaker 3 (02:02):
Come and celebrate or just what to hang with. Yeah,
totally trigger warning. A brief mentions of violence against women
in this one.
Speaker 2 (02:11):
And this one.
Speaker 3 (02:12):
Actually came to my mind because I learned about dating
Sunday for the first time here in the United States
at least, which is apparently a new Year's resolution post
holiday breakup thing and maybe like you're still single, questions
that you got over the holidays, or omg, Valentine's Day
is coming around the corner one of those or a
(02:33):
combination of those reasons that results in a bunch of
people signing up for dating apps. The first Sunday of
the new year is the busiest day of the year
for dating apps.
Speaker 2 (02:43):
Do you know about this year.
Speaker 4 (02:44):
Yes, I did, and I purposely stayed away from January
all the way through March when I was on the
dating sites because of that.
Speaker 1 (02:52):
I will not be a statistic. You are so much
more than a statistic to me, is amanth.
Speaker 4 (02:57):
I do know that there's also a tradition for New Year,
or do you know how people do things that if
you'll wear pink underwear that's supposed to usher your new
lovers or something.
Speaker 2 (03:05):
I have not heard that.
Speaker 1 (03:07):
Yeah, I've heard that. Okay, well I did it.
Speaker 3 (03:10):
Sure you did it or didn't, It doesn't matter either way.
Some apps see an increase of new users up to
eighty percent. And one of the ways I learned about
this is I got asked out a lot in January
and it made me stop and think, something is happening here,
Something is not right, And now I know it is.
(03:33):
I was part of the statistics. You were in some ways,
so you were on the apps, right, No, No, I was.
Speaker 2 (03:39):
Just getting asked out.
Speaker 3 (03:40):
As I've said before, I do have a very long
history of dating people born on or near Valentine's State.
Speaker 2 (03:45):
That has also given me pause. And a lot of
my friends.
Speaker 3 (03:49):
Are born around this time, right, I don't believe in astrology,
but I'm like, huh, interesting.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
Those are the types of people. Huh.
Speaker 3 (03:55):
Yes, Samantha and I we were discussing what our schools
used to do for Valentine's Day, like, you know, primary
school and I was in elementary school. We would make
these little decorated shoeboxes with slots for Valentine's cards, and
you just would sort of sit around awkwardly and hope
that you got one after you'd given years out. And
(04:17):
I hope that the one you got wasn't mean, because
I got some mean ones.
Speaker 1 (04:21):
Really, yes, I did. It's so weird.
Speaker 3 (04:23):
You didn't have this experience, no, geez, well I did.
And we went to school nearish each.
Speaker 1 (04:29):
Other, nearish, different timeframes.
Speaker 2 (04:32):
That's true, But you'd think it would improve over time and.
Speaker 1 (04:35):
Not get more. Right. Apparently y'all got meaner. I don't know.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
We mean.
Speaker 1 (04:40):
You have a picture of your face with a bunch
of pimples on it.
Speaker 4 (04:42):
Wow, Oh my gosh, what Yes, that's elaborate.
Speaker 1 (04:46):
Oh I'm a main girl. Elaborate Stephen. I haven't forgotten
Steven's but I got I got back.
Speaker 3 (04:52):
Later in high school, we had this thing where you
could pay a dollar to send either white think our
red rose anonymously. White represented friendship, Pink represented a crush.
I think and read represented love. But of course my
friends and I all hijacked it and we sent each
other flowers from secreted miners.
Speaker 2 (05:13):
It was great.
Speaker 3 (05:15):
My mom would always make me these paper roses every
year I have when I saved them. I'm a very
sentimental person, and my dad would get me a chocolate
from our local chocolate maker. So it was like a
grab bag of some bad things but.
Speaker 2 (05:28):
Some good things.
Speaker 1 (05:28):
Wow.
Speaker 4 (05:29):
I guess you guys did a lot more. Maybe my
school just did not care as much. We definitely did
the bio ros whatever do with those things. It wasn't
different colors to represent anything a b We were never mean.
I mean, I think for our school we did the
little dinky shoe boxes as well, but everybody brought everyone
(05:49):
of Valentine and you won if there was a piece
of candy on it. That's how you knew you were liked,
kind of if you got more candy or whatever whatnot.
Of course, we would also have the one where they
would send deliveries individual kids and such, and I remember
specifically that I had to have a boyfriend the third
(06:09):
grade because for the like I'm never, I was like,
I'm no. It was fifth grade and I was determined
to have someone deliver something to me.
Speaker 1 (06:16):
I love it.
Speaker 4 (06:17):
I know I was very manipulative, but to be fair,
I got him a really great thing too, And I'm
sure I think included one of those pencils with the
heart that breaks.
Speaker 1 (06:25):
Oh yeah, be mine or whatever.
Speaker 4 (06:28):
Right, So, I mean we gave each other gifts, but yeah, no,
never any mean ones I never saw. Maybe you were
just nicer, or maybe I just never noticed.
Speaker 2 (06:39):
Yeah you things kind of been going on.
Speaker 4 (06:41):
Maybe I just didn't know my friends were nicer than
your friends. I don't know, oh how friends. But I
will say I also get a box of chocolates even
to this day, every year from my father, and that's
one of the things that he loves to do, is
give my sister and I a box of chocolates, and
even with me being not home, he mels.
Speaker 1 (07:00):
It and usually like prioritizes it.
Speaker 4 (07:02):
You know, that has to be one day shipping all
these scenes something from Walmwater Target or something.
Speaker 2 (07:09):
Okay, yeah, well it should be coming any day.
Speaker 4 (07:12):
Now.
Speaker 2 (07:12):
I'm around, I'm available.
Speaker 1 (07:14):
Okay's just saying, okay, all right.
Speaker 3 (07:16):
Well we're doing a kind of basic, very brief history
of Valentine's is actually fascinating. But before that overview, Valentine's
Day is a holiday that takes place on February fourteenth,
all about love and expressing your love, usually through things
like cards, flowers, and candy.
Speaker 2 (07:32):
Yes, it is a big business.
Speaker 3 (07:35):
In twenty ten, people spent around eighteen point six billion
dollars on Valentine's Day.
Speaker 4 (07:41):
And these days Valentine's Day is a great way for
companies and corporations to perpetuate heterodating and gender stereotypes. Women
love chocolate, right, No, but it wasn't always a holiday
about love, No, it was so. With a brief history
of Valentine's Day, No one's entirely sure where Valentine came from,
but one popular theory goes all the way back to
(08:03):
the ancient Roman celebration of Lupercalia from February thirteenth to
the fifteenth. This festival call for men, who, surprise, were
usually drunk and naked, to sacrifice a goat and a dog.
How dare you? Then they would skin these animals and
whip women with the skin. Delightful, What a great celebration.
The women believed this ritual helped with fertility. There was
(08:25):
a matchmaking aspect as well. Men would draw the names
of women out of jars and the couple would go
off and have lots of sex for the rest of
the festival, and if they hit it off, they might
even stay together.
Speaker 3 (08:36):
This sounds sort of like I just finished the Newest
Thing of Sabrina, The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina. I feel
like a couple of seasons back they had this.
Speaker 4 (08:45):
They did they had the worship being whatever, and they
paired with each other.
Speaker 3 (08:50):
You're supposed to have sex all night or something or something.
It didn't happen that way, But not for Sabrina. Yeah,
other people, who knows, not for Sabrina. As for the
name Valentine's, during the third century CE, Roman emperor Claudius
had two men named Valentine executed via decapitation on February
fourteenth on two separate years, possibly because they were Christians.
(09:11):
The first man, Father Valentinus, ended up arrested and in
servitude of a well off man named Asterius. Father Valentinus
kept espousing the power of Christianity and Hysterius told him, Look,
if you can get rid of my foster daughter's blindness,
you will make a believer out of me. So the
father covered the girl's eyes with his hands and recited,
Lord Jesus Christ, enlighten your handmaid, because you are God,
(09:33):
the true light, and the legend goes.
Speaker 2 (09:35):
She regained her sight.
Speaker 3 (09:36):
Mysterius converted, along with his entire family, but getting wind
of this, the emperor ordered them all to be executed.
The second Valentine to be executed had an extremely similar story,
and of so scholars suspect they're probably the same person,
just with two different names and slightly different details. Nevertheless,
(09:56):
the Catholic Church later honored their martyrdom with St.
Speaker 2 (10:00):
Valentine's Day.
Speaker 3 (10:01):
Several churches throughout Europe claim to have pieces of Saint
Valentine's skull.
Speaker 2 (10:05):
One place even claims to have the whole thing.
Speaker 3 (10:08):
If you're curious about where this information comes from, because
I was there was a I guess he was a priest.
He went around collecting stories for all of these saints
and compiled them into one book. So if you're ever
curious about a saint, then check it out. In the
(10:30):
eleventh century, a priest claiming to have Saint Valentine's head
used it to cure a whole laundry list of things,
including demonic possession and to prevent fires and epidemics.
Speaker 1 (10:40):
Oh we need that today, we do.
Speaker 2 (10:42):
I wonder where it is. I wonder that's the new Indiana.
Speaker 1 (10:46):
Jonas getting her bed.
Speaker 2 (10:47):
I mean, come on there.
Speaker 3 (10:48):
It is a lot of media has romanticized the story
of Valentine, that he wrote love letters in jail or
performed marriages in jail, but there's no real historical evidence.
Speaker 2 (10:57):
To back that up. What we have is on shaky
enough ground.
Speaker 4 (11:01):
Speaking of the Catholic charge, in an attempt to due
away with pagan festivals, they combined Valentine's Day with Librecalia
in fifth century CE. But it was still pretty much
a day about getting drunk and fertility, but now with
clothes on, because you know Christians, right, that's the way
you got to do it. In parallel, there was Gallanton's Day,
a holiday observed by the Normans.
Speaker 1 (11:21):
Gallanton meant lover of women.
Speaker 4 (11:24):
Because the names are similar, It's likely they got combined
at some point in time.
Speaker 3 (11:28):
Right, and then, with the help of artists like Shakespeare Ofhilia,
describes herself as hamlets Valentine and Shaucer, who wrote a
February as the seasoned birdsmate Tauru. Romantic Valentine's Day was
romanticized and popularized throughout Europe. By the Middle Ages, handmade
paper cards had become a part of this tradition. The
French Duke of Orleans described his wife as his quote
(11:51):
very gentle Valentine in a letter he wrote to her
in February fourteen fifteen. Sweets became a part of it,
to getting something sweet for someone you thought was sweet.
Speaker 1 (12:00):
Oh, so I need to get you something sweet.
Speaker 2 (12:02):
Oh you think I'm sweets?
Speaker 1 (12:03):
Oh you know I do. So.
Speaker 4 (12:05):
From Europe, this holiday spread, eventually making its way to
the New World. Nineteenth century industrialization added mass produced, factory
made cards to the mix, and in nineteen thirteen a
little coupling you may have heard of, oh, I don't know,
called Hallmark. Hallmark Cards started making cards in Kansas City, Missouri.
Speaker 3 (12:23):
Right and from there you can imagine, oh, the birth
of cards. So yeah, well, they were very instrumental in
popularizing a lot of the holidays we celebrate.
Speaker 1 (12:33):
Because that's their bread and butter.
Speaker 3 (12:35):
Why you gotta get a card for this holiday in
the card exactly, but not all cards.
Speaker 1 (12:42):
We were nice.
Speaker 2 (12:44):
And we're going to get into that.
Speaker 3 (12:46):
But first we're gonna fall for a quick break for
word from our sponsor. And we're back, Thank you, sponsor,
And we're back with something I actually learned about. I
(13:07):
remember the precise moment I learned about this over on
our other show that my other show that I do
is Samantha. You should just come along and be part
of it. We Savor, which is all about food and drink.
We did an episode for Valentine's Day on Sweethearts, the
candy yes, with the messages, and I somehow found this
(13:27):
thing about giving people mean sweethearts. And from there I
found this old tradition of giving people vinegar Valentine.
Speaker 4 (13:37):
And you told me about this, and I had no
clue that was a thing. I'm still kind of baffled. Oh,
even though we've been researching it, I'm still baffled.
Speaker 3 (13:45):
Oh it's baffling. Actually, it makes perfect sense in a
weird way.
Speaker 2 (13:49):
And I'm going to bring it all together to.
Speaker 4 (13:51):
Be fair, though I feel like I would be. This
is probably my type of Valentine anyway, Lord.
Speaker 3 (13:57):
It probably is so This is something that I'm i
is hilarious, but I'm also really glad it's a thing of.
Speaker 2 (14:04):
The past because they're pretty mean, and we're going to
do some examples.
Speaker 3 (14:08):
But so vinegar Valentine's were previously called mocking insulting. Our
comic vinegar is actually something that we call them modernly.
That's not what they were called back then. And this
was the practice from about the eighteen forties to nineteen
forties that was particularly popular in the United States and
the UK of giving people a mean or cool card,
usually with a crude caricature, almost always anonymously. Oh even
(14:32):
when folks made their own Valentines before there was a
commercialization of cards, they made these vinegar versions.
Speaker 2 (14:39):
They made homemade vinegar versions.
Speaker 3 (14:41):
I guess that's what I was getting in elementary school.
But the commercialization of cards took that and ran with it.
Speaker 2 (14:48):
They made them.
Speaker 3 (14:50):
People would buy these cards for about a penny or
sometimes more for a fancy one, and they could get
pretty fancy and send them through the mail, again anonymously
to add insult to in the person receiving the vinegar
valentine usually had.
Speaker 1 (15:03):
To pay for postage.
Speaker 3 (15:06):
They had to pay for it It could be someone
you secretly despise, or it could be a not so
nice way to tell a suitor you were not that
into them.
Speaker 2 (15:14):
That was a really popular one. We should do these,
I don't think so. I don't think so.
Speaker 3 (15:20):
You could send one to a couple you didn't like,
or if they were doing PDA you didn't like, you
could send that. You could strongly advise them to change
their behavior. There A lot of them are threatening in nature,
like change your ways or else. Millions of these millions
were printed. If you think about it as I have,
(15:41):
they were sort of an early example of trolling.
Speaker 1 (15:44):
It really is.
Speaker 3 (15:45):
It's like we complain about social media today and how
terrible people are, but we've been terrible apparently as long
as we.
Speaker 2 (15:52):
Can be anonymous.
Speaker 3 (15:55):
Yeah, Because if you didn't want to say something to
someone's face.
Speaker 2 (15:59):
Here here was a great way to do it.
Speaker 3 (16:00):
And you could get them for just about anything or anyone.
Speaker 2 (16:05):
They get so specific.
Speaker 3 (16:07):
At one time, these cards accounted for half of all
Valentine's sales, not just cards sales in the United States.
Speaker 5 (16:16):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (16:17):
Yeah, the power of anonymity, I guess. Yes.
Speaker 3 (16:20):
So we do want to have we want to go
through some examples.
Speaker 1 (16:22):
Oh yeah, these are fine.
Speaker 4 (16:23):
So there's one this image that shows a woman handing
a man a lemon, and the caption reads, to my Valentine,
'tis a limon I hand you? Now skadoo? Because I
love another there's no chance for you. Also, I would
like to say all of these have great words that
we never use anymore, such as skadoo, and I think
(16:44):
I would need to bring them back.
Speaker 1 (16:45):
You need the chance Atlantic accent. Oh yeah, I know,
I don't do that.
Speaker 2 (16:48):
Well, I mean, we'll see how it goes.
Speaker 3 (16:51):
There's one of a woman dumping a bucket of water
on a man's head that reads, here's a pretty cool reception.
At least you'll say, there's no exception. It's just as
plain as it can say, old fellow, you best step away.
Speaker 1 (17:04):
That may be something you should do now, I know.
Speaker 4 (17:08):
Another one shows a snake in a suit on and
a top hat, and then there's a woman looking on
in the fear in the background, and the caption goes,
I'm not attracted by your glitter for well, I know
how very bitter my life would be if I should
take you for my spouse.
Speaker 1 (17:22):
A rattlesnake.
Speaker 4 (17:23):
Oh no, I'd not accept the ring or evermore twould
prove us sting.
Speaker 3 (17:27):
Oh also, I think that snake had a monocle. Just
want to add that in That.
Speaker 1 (17:31):
Probably sounds about right.
Speaker 2 (17:32):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (17:33):
Another depicts a man about to kiss a donkey with
the message, Hey, lover boy, the place for you is
home upon the shelf, because the only one who'd kiss
you is.
Speaker 1 (17:41):
A jackass like yourself.
Speaker 3 (17:44):
Or this titled bald Head, Your bright shining pate is
seen at all shows and invariably down in the bald
headed rose, where you make conspicuous by your tender care.
Speaker 2 (17:56):
Your true ardent love for one onesome hair.
Speaker 1 (17:59):
Oh so mean, no one's superman.
Speaker 4 (18:02):
So several were moral based about PDA or alcoholism.
Speaker 1 (18:06):
Or this one called television bug.
Speaker 4 (18:09):
It says at faces that are televised all day and night,
you stare, but if.
Speaker 1 (18:13):
They saw your stupid mug, they'd all go off the air.
Oh my gosh, I love the rhyme. Not gonna lie.
Speaker 2 (18:18):
The rhymes are fun. Yeah uh. And these cars got down.
Speaker 1 (18:21):
To the occupation specific.
Speaker 3 (18:23):
If you had a sales lady you didn't like, there's
a vinegar valentine that had you covered like this one.
Saleslady as you wait upon the women with discuss upon
your face. The way you snap and bark at them,
one would think you owned the place. Oho, if you
weren't a fan of your physician. There was a character
named doctor Shirdeath. You could even send one to the
(18:44):
postman who delivered the note. They were very big during
the Civil War. TiO one shows a woman with a
large skull for a head carrying a chainsaw. The caption
reads to the surgeon, ho, ho old saw bones, here
you come. Yes, when the rebels whack as you are
always ready with your traps to mangle saw and hack us.
Speaker 2 (19:06):
Oh.
Speaker 4 (19:07):
There was a whole category of cars meant to masculate
men who had babies on their lap as being hen pecked,
which is also a great word, but not good.
Speaker 1 (19:14):
No, But at the same time it's an old school word.
It's ridiculous.
Speaker 2 (19:18):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (19:18):
And then the old maid from eighteen ninety four, 'tis
all in vain your simpering looks. You never can incline
with all of your bustles, stay in curls to find
a Valentine.
Speaker 3 (19:28):
And this one she's caught a poor cat and a bird,
but she can't snare a man. So we've heard see
old maid's sad fate to lose out on a mate
and take tea.
Speaker 2 (19:37):
But sh not a.
Speaker 3 (19:38):
Word or this one. You've got more curves than a
roller coaster. Your clothes fit like a glove. There's one
thing wrong, glamour puss. You've a face only a mother
would love.
Speaker 4 (19:50):
So many depicted women in unfeminine ways, miss nosy and
image of a woman with a large nose that reads
on account of your talk of others affairs at most dances,
you sit warming the chairs because of the k you
take to attend to all others business.
Speaker 3 (20:04):
You have a a friend and speaking of unfeminine women's
suffrage ushered in a whole new wave of vinegar Valentine's
aimed at women fighting for the right to vote, Like this,
your vote for me, you will not get. I don't
want a preaching suffragette. These cards typically portrayed suffragettes as
ugly and often violent. Some women sent Valentine's to a
(20:27):
sure would be suitors that they weren't like those suffragists
reading in these wild days of suffragette dreys. I'm sure
you'd never overlook a girl who can't be militant. But
simply loves to cook, okay, but there were pro suffragette
Valentine's as well, So you.
Speaker 4 (20:45):
Know, it's kind of like the feminists and anti feminists today,
and it's just in Twitter.
Speaker 2 (20:51):
Exactly exactly.
Speaker 3 (20:54):
These cards, while popular, were certainly not universally well liked,
and it's hard to say how many were jokes how
many were totally serious. An eighteen ninety five article from
the Kindergarten Primary magazine lamented the detrimental effects these cars
had on children, calling on teachers to quote make it
a day for kind remembrance than a day for wrecking revenge.
(21:15):
One post office in Chicago held over twenty five thousand Valentines,
deeming some of the cards to Vulgart to send. But
there are historical examples of people getting murdered or taking
their own lives over vinegar Valentine.
Speaker 1 (21:30):
So it's a bullying tactic.
Speaker 2 (21:32):
It is. It absolutely is.
Speaker 4 (21:33):
Again, these are funny to read right now, but plenty
were super sexist and racist and fat phobic, and some
advise people to kill themselves. Really, if you think of
comment boards and Twitter fees, you doue comments. In some
ways this is still going on, actually in a lot
of ways. Yeah, going on, and people have always been terrible.
And again, the world is burning.
Speaker 2 (21:55):
Sminty, the world is burning.
Speaker 1 (21:57):
That's our tackling.
Speaker 4 (21:58):
Oh so wow, yeah, Vinegar Valentine's I never knew it
was such a thing.
Speaker 3 (22:03):
I would recommend looking it up just to see the
imagery in a lot of them.
Speaker 4 (22:09):
Oh god, oh my, that sounds disheartening. Yes, but maybe
we should go on to a bitter better We're not bitter, yes,
better topics.
Speaker 1 (22:18):
Such as Gallentine's Day.
Speaker 2 (22:20):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (22:20):
So the actual name and celebration was first on Parks
and rec episode that aired on February eleventh, twenty ten.
Speaker 1 (22:27):
Also should be noted that it was written by a man.
Oh yes, so.
Speaker 4 (22:31):
In the episode, we see one of my faves, Amy Poehler,
celebrating with her gal pals with brunch and plenty of
kitschy presents and gifts, and as Leslie explained it, every
February thirteenth, my lady friends and I leave our husbands
and our boyfriends at home and we just come and
kick it breakfast style ladies celebrating ladies. It's like the
Lilith Fair minus the eighths plus for tatas and waffles.
Speaker 1 (22:53):
And waffles, of course the waffles.
Speaker 3 (22:54):
Yeah, as defined by Urban Dictionary, February thirteenth, The other
half of Valentine's Day, when you celebrate your love for
your lady friends single r. No, Hey, Judy, you're such
a great friend to me, and I want to celebrate
our friend love, not only my sexy love with my
boyfriend Marvin tomorrow. So let's have a dinner and get
together the day before Valentine's Day. Gallantine's Day, sexy love,
(23:16):
sexy love, yes, friend love and sexy love yeah.
Speaker 1 (23:18):
No, you got to differentiate.
Speaker 4 (23:20):
So if you have seen the show, and most likely
if a friend of yours have seen the show, then
you know that, yes, this is a maid of holiday.
But the success of it has made some great commercial success,
whether from different products being marketed towards the holiday or
from the sheer amount of publicity written in reference to
said holiday.
Speaker 3 (23:36):
Yes, one thing as part of our jobs. And you
might not get this a lot yet, Samanthah, but you
will is cold emails from pr companies, and I have
probably gotten at least thirty about Galentine's Day and what
I should be doing on Galentine's Day and what I
should buy my gal Pal friends. So definitely companies have
capitalized on it. And also, as I said before, it
(24:00):
wasn't an official day.
Speaker 2 (24:01):
But I feel like a lot of.
Speaker 3 (24:02):
Us we've been doing something like this right for a
long time. We just didn't call it this, and we
didn't have all the kind of traditions. Even though it's new,
there's kind of a set here's what you do exactly.
Speaker 1 (24:13):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (24:14):
Spreading wide enough, it has spawned books, articles both arguing
for and against. As New York Post writer Haley Eber
stated in her twenty seventeen column celebrating female friendship is great,
but tying it to Valentine's Day reeks of an opportunistic
marketing ploy, stating she felt it was being used as
only a marketing ploy, in that February thirteenth had once
(24:35):
been referred to as Mistress Day, again for cheeters to
take their side pieces, as she states, out for private celebration.
Speaker 4 (24:43):
Perhaps it could be stated that Valentines was the answer
to the long appropriated idea that Valentine's was single awareness day.
Side note, there seems to be a whole lot of feelings,
whether it's love, loneliness, or defensiveness, just a whole lot
of emotion around this month, right, And again speaking of
a single Awareness Day, this was created in two thousand
and five with the idea that for too long, February
(25:05):
fourteenth was SAD, which is the acronym for Single Awareness
Day in a negative and so taking it back and
celebrating being single and being aware of that day, I
guess is on the fifties to celebrate one's own singleness
if you happen to be single.
Speaker 3 (25:20):
Right, And when I was in college, me and a
big group of my female friends would do Single Awareness
Day SAD, but we would kind of do it like ironically,
like we were single, right, but we weren't sad.
Speaker 2 (25:30):
We were super happy. We would kind of joke about it.
Speaker 1 (25:33):
Yes, it's a celebration of I don't need no persons.
Speaker 3 (25:36):
Yeah yeah, and then we would always like, really do
it up.
Speaker 2 (25:40):
It was really fun.
Speaker 3 (25:43):
And of course it should be noted that there are
several other days created before Gallentine's Day, such as International
Day of Friendship, created by the UN and World Friendship
Crusade in nineteen fifty eight and celebrated on July thirtieth,
although most countries celebrate on the first Sunday, in August.
Speaker 2 (26:00):
And by the way, in nineteen ninety eight, Winnie.
Speaker 3 (26:03):
The Pooh but you didn't know apparently I didn't know,
was appointed as the Ambassador of Friendship by the UN.
Speaker 2 (26:10):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (26:10):
Also of note, National Friendship Day was created by Hallmark
in nineteen nineteen, but apparently went away in the nineteen forties.
Speaker 2 (26:16):
I guess they didn't sell enough card maybe not, maybe not.
Speaker 3 (26:20):
And yeah, I actually I had a brain freeze and
forgot who Winny of the Woo was.
Speaker 1 (26:23):
It's all okay, I did know who you were.
Speaker 2 (26:25):
Now you know, Now I know.
Speaker 3 (26:28):
And we did want to talk about some traditions around
the world. But first we're going to pause for one
more quick pick for a word from our sponsor, and
(26:49):
we're back.
Speaker 2 (26:49):
Thank you sponsor.
Speaker 3 (26:50):
And yeah, we did want to talk about some traditions
from elsewhere.
Speaker 4 (26:54):
Yeah, and you know, we would love to hear about
traditions from other countries. So please let us know if
you're in a different country, or even if you have
different types of traditions, let us know. Because apparently in
Denmark men give women something called a joking letter.
Speaker 1 (27:07):
Traditionally. I'm as assuming anyone can do it.
Speaker 4 (27:10):
Yeah, the letter has a funny joke or rhyme signed
only with a series of dots like dot dot dot.
Speaker 3 (27:17):
I think, yeah, I think maybe I was thinking Morse code.
Speaker 2 (27:20):
But see this is.
Speaker 4 (27:23):
So if the receiver can figure out who the author is,
they get an easter egg when the holiday rolls around.
Speaker 1 (27:29):
What Yeah, huh, I wonder if that's really true?
Speaker 4 (27:32):
Please write it so you get an easter egg if
you Yeah, but you have to wait, you have that
long to figure out who it is. Probably is Morse code,
because I wouldn't imagine what an asterisk would be a
hint of sorts.
Speaker 2 (27:46):
Yeah, and I do feel like I could be totally wrong.
Speaker 4 (27:50):
So I feel like this tradition, we're gonna need to
know some answer we need we.
Speaker 2 (27:54):
Have questions that need answer.
Speaker 3 (27:57):
At one time, the French participated in something called the
more drawing for love.
Speaker 2 (28:02):
It sort of.
Speaker 3 (28:03):
Sounds like choosing a kickball team or something. Men and
women would separate and then call each other's names out
and they would couple up. The men, of course, could
choose another woman if they didn't like the one who
they ended up with, and the unmatched women would go
have a bonfire together, hurling insults and swears to men
who had wrong them, burning the pictures of those men.
(28:23):
This holiday got so out of hand the French government
stepped in and banned it. In England, there used to
be a tradition of women putting bay leaves under their
bed the night before Valentine's Day, one at each corner
and the center to dream of their future husbands. You
can check out the episode we did on bay leaves
ever at Savor for more on that, and we also
(28:45):
talked about South Korea's Black Day on April fourteenth, which
is a day where singles eat black foods.
Speaker 2 (28:50):
Too mourned their single status. But being single is great, y'all.
It's all good.
Speaker 1 (28:55):
Hey, I'll eat food.
Speaker 2 (28:58):
Yeah, I from what I understand again, listeners right in.
Speaker 3 (29:01):
It's also sort of ironic, like I don't think I
don't think.
Speaker 2 (29:07):
People are really upset about it, but I could be wrong.
Speaker 3 (29:09):
So we would love to hear from anybody who knows
there are black food.
Speaker 2 (29:14):
So we did it.
Speaker 3 (29:14):
And in our Savor episode we talked about we were
talking about cuttlefish ink and so things just.
Speaker 2 (29:19):
Die like it could be anything. Noodles.
Speaker 3 (29:21):
I think noodles is traditional, but like the outside of
tumblings or cupcakes all.
Speaker 4 (29:26):
Ridings or kin have the black Hamburger or whatever, and.
Speaker 2 (29:31):
We also talked about that.
Speaker 4 (29:32):
Oh okay, yes, so I need to go listen to
that episode right now.
Speaker 3 (29:36):
You do, you'll learn a lot and we would love
to learn a lot from you listeners, as we always do,
and we do have some listener male for this one,
starting with Mikhayla. She wrote, Hey, y'all, I loved your
two parter on female revengers, particularly because I'm currently in
a production of Shakespeare's Titus Andronicus, featuring one of the
most intense here's my bias showing female revengers to more
(29:59):
at Queen of the Gow. Yes, as an actor, villains
are forever juicy to play, but Tamora Tamora has been
a mind job and a challenge unlike anything I face
to date the story if you're not savvy. After losing
a ten year war against Rome, she her three sons,
and a mercenary, her secret lover Aaron the More are
dragged to Rome as trophies. Her firstborn son is chosen
(30:19):
for sacrifice by way of a right by the titular
character Titus. She begs she appeals to him as a
parent but he does not relent, and her son is
needlessly buy us again slaughtered. By this, she is forever
altered and irreversibly damaged, and bent on revenge. Of epic proportions,
she is elevated to Empress Yes in the same scene,
her son was murdered, and she reclaims a status that
(30:42):
will assist her in gaining vengeance, and.
Speaker 2 (30:44):
Boy howdy does she.
Speaker 3 (30:45):
She aids and abets the mutilation and rape of Titus's daughter,
as well as the murder of the daughter's new husband,
frames two of his sons for said murder, and attempts
to drive Titus and sane with grief. The thing is,
he's already pretty insane. Forty years of war will do
that someone. But he's the victor of war and so
lauded for a service to Rome, so his wild behavior
is mostly allowed, even when he kills one of his
(31:07):
own sons.
Speaker 2 (31:08):
But I digress.
Speaker 3 (31:10):
In the end, she loses her mind and believes she
has trick Titus into something that will finish him and
his remaining family. However, he hasn't actually bought the farm,
and her sons are captured, murdered, and baked into a pie,
which she eats at a banquet. She is then killed
by Titus, and it is pronounced that her body will
be tossed to the animals to feast on as it rots,
because having lived beastly, she will be food for beast
(31:32):
Tamora is a woman in a man's world who, when
she behaves like a man I e. Aggressively, is deemed barbarous,
without womanhood and without grace. Though when Titus and every
other man in the play behaving kind, no eyebrow gets raised,
her sexual prowess is often discussed as a negative, either
as a tool of manipulation or further evidence of her barbarism. Meanwhile,
Titus has begotten twenty six sons of one would have
(31:54):
to imagine twenty six separate women delivered to him upon
his returns from war, because you know, dude's gotta let
off some steam after all that warring. Furthermore, Lavinia, Titus's daughter,
exists to service her father and her husband, and is
literally referred to as an object or property throughout the play.
They are the only two women in the play, and
so the Madonna and the horror dynamic is omnipresent. I
(32:15):
have so much more to say, but I've already said
more than I thought I would, and I hear the
atro music spelling. Just want to make sure my favorite
Shakespearean lady villain got her due.
Speaker 1 (32:24):
Nice.
Speaker 2 (32:25):
I saw that.
Speaker 3 (32:26):
I saw the movie, yeah, when I was a kid
in its.
Speaker 1 (32:31):
Yeah, that could be a little bit horrifying. The pie
the pies.
Speaker 3 (32:36):
Anyway, Whitney wrote, I thought of you both while watching
a movie recently, and how appropriate considering you ass listeners
for movie recommendations. There's a movie out of China called
The Widowed Witch about a woman who survives a factory
explosion which kills her husband. While recovering from this trauma,
she endured in other trauma. She ends up becoming a
traveling shaman. This movie seems to tick off both categories
(32:58):
of somewhat revenge film as well as witch film. Is
also a non white depiction of women practicing magic, perfect, perfect,
well less love recommendations. Yes, we're definitely gonna check that out.
Speaker 1 (33:09):
So we need to know. How are you going to
celebrate February fourteenth or not? You don't have to, I
don't blame you.
Speaker 4 (33:16):
Do you have a unique tradition or how is it
celebrated in your neck of the Woods. If you don't
do Valentine's Day, is there an equivalent.
Speaker 2 (33:22):
Or any of those friendship days?
Speaker 5 (33:24):
Oh?
Speaker 4 (33:24):
Yes, I definitely had a Galentine's tradition for a while.
Speaker 3 (33:28):
Yes, as did I. You can send your stories answers
to our questions. We had many in this episode. Yes,
please don't seen vinegar Valentines unless they're funny.
Speaker 4 (33:39):
Unless I actually would appreciate a good funny one.
Speaker 2 (33:41):
Yeah, a good funny one, that's okay.
Speaker 3 (33:43):
You can email us at Stuff Media, mom Stuff at
iHeartMedia dot com. You can find us on Instagram at
stuff I Never Told You and on Twitter at mom
Stuff Podcast. Thanks as always to our super producer Andrew Howard,
and also.
Speaker 1 (33:56):
Be part of the Galanines.
Speaker 3 (33:58):
We'll allow it, and thanks to you for listening. Stuff
I Never Told You's a protection of iHeartRadio is how
stuff works for more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visits iHeartRadio app,
Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
Stuff Mom Never Told You News
Hosts And Creators
Anney Reese
Samantha McVey
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