June 3, 2023 • 12 mins
Anney and Samantha sip some drinks and Anney talks about Pride, being ace, and belonging in this classic episode.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:05):
Hey, this is Annie and Samantha. Don't got to stephone
never told you production of iHeartRadio. And it is June
of twenty twenty three, which means we are in Pride month.
(00:26):
So we have a bunch of classics around pride, queer
stuff issues, all of that to come. Unfortunately, there's a
lot of bad news have to talk about, but we
will talk about it.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
Started.
Speaker 1 (00:44):
This isn't really bad news, but I got this headline
that the day because Google sends me these updates even
though I've tried to turn it off several times. Apparently
there's a trend. Have you heard of this, Samantha, the
good luck dying alone? No, apparently it's just apparently people
(01:11):
online are just getting into fights about people who are
single and happy and saying good luck diying alone, which
of course they are, of course they are. So as
someone who feels pretty confident through the show, you all
heard me kind of coming out and realizing I'm asexual
(01:36):
and still like pondering some of the specifics, but you know,
good luck dying alone, I say, I will have my
friends by my.
Speaker 2 (01:49):
Side, exactly. Yes.
Speaker 1 (01:53):
Yes, So there are a couple of classics I wanted
to bring back around just my my kind of coming out.
So here's the first one. Please enjoy. Hey, this is
Annie and Samantha, and welcome to stuff. I never told
(02:13):
you a protection of iHeart radio. And it's time for
another happy hour, and this one's gonna be mostly happy.
Speaker 2 (02:29):
Although there will be some unhappy parts of it. I'm
mostly happy.
Speaker 3 (02:34):
Is that another segment?
Speaker 2 (02:37):
How it should be? I like it. I think that's
more accurate to most of the h that's always.
Speaker 1 (02:45):
If you are choosing to drink, please do so responsibly.
Speaker 2 (02:49):
Samantha, what are you sipping on?
Speaker 3 (02:51):
Uh? You know, I discovered the Brooklyn Summer Pale all.
It is nice and crisp and low abb Uh it's
called the Sunny Pill l and thoroughly. So that's what
I'm drinking on today. What about you?
Speaker 2 (03:05):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (03:06):
Well, I just lamented to you that I have no
cold drinks available to me right now, so I am
drinking boxed red wine in my delicious hot hot studio closet.
Speaker 3 (03:19):
You could, you know, fancy it up, but I think ice.
Speaker 1 (03:22):
I've never added ice to straight boxed red wine, and
I have to say my immediate reaction is like recoiling.
Speaker 4 (03:31):
Drinking box wine baby boo. I mean no hate on
box wine. I love some boxed wine. I'm just saying that's.
Speaker 3 (03:37):
What's making you recoil.
Speaker 2 (03:38):
I think you'll be okay. But I get you. I
get you. Yeah, like a sangria. Yeah, I get it.
I mean it's true, You're right. Maybe I'm drawing lines
or they don't need to thank you, thank you. I
mean it's not.
Speaker 1 (03:52):
Bad, but it is quite hot, and I would love
a refreshing, cool beverage, right alas Olas, Well, so today's
July fifth, so we're out of Pride month.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
But I did want to do kind of a little update.
Speaker 1 (04:07):
That I shared with Samantha because it's sort of a
powerful moment I experienced recently, and it happened after we
had our now real friend, I know, I r L
friend Kate Osborne, who was a guest on this show
a couple whiles back. We met at a restaurant and
we had a lovely lunch together, delicious. We did we
(04:29):
made a friend as an adult, Samantha, Yeah, we did it.
Speaker 2 (04:33):
We did that too. You and I were.
Speaker 3 (04:35):
Yes, I mean, like a few of them, and it's
nice to have.
Speaker 1 (04:42):
It is funny though, because it feels like a setup
in a weird way. You and I kind of happened naturally,
But a lot of times when I've personally made friends
as an adult, it's felt kind of like a setup
or something.
Speaker 2 (04:53):
What if they don't like me?
Speaker 4 (04:58):
I mean to be fair, we did sit like we
were interviewing Kate at one pos, so that was super awkward.
Speaker 1 (05:03):
It was awkward, but it was It turned out to
be lovely and it was great. I think we're going
to hang out again, you know, fingers crossed. I don't
think she's lying to us, but.
Speaker 2 (05:14):
I hope not.
Speaker 1 (05:15):
But she posted about the episode we did together on
ADHD and Sex and also the episode I was on
on her show about just D and D and fangirl stuff.
And after that, I got a lot of followers, A lot.
I mean for me, a lot is like five to ten.
And that's essentially what happened. But yeah, that's a lot.
Speaker 2 (05:36):
That's a lot to me. And a lot of them
were ACE.
Speaker 1 (05:42):
They were asexual, and they kind of reached out to
me and we're like, oh, hi, I see you. No,
I nice to meet another person who's ACE. And I
broke down into tears. Samita.
Speaker 2 (05:52):
I started cry.
Speaker 1 (05:54):
Because I just like it felt like a belonging I
haven't felt because I've been I've told people I was
queer since high school, but it's always been something where
I've felt like I'm on the outskirts of it and
I had no right to claim the label, and like,
(06:15):
I don't know, like if I went to a Pride event,
they'd see me.
Speaker 2 (06:17):
And be like, no, you don't belong here. You are fake.
Speaker 1 (06:22):
And as I said in many of these episodes, I
didn't know a sexuality was a thing until twenty eleven
when I was working on this show. I didn't know
like there was a romantic spectrum until even later, I think.
And I pretty much came out to you all on
this podcast like that.
Speaker 2 (06:38):
Was my experience.
Speaker 1 (06:41):
I have come out to people in person since then,
but everyone I've come out to and this is this
is gonna.
Speaker 2 (06:47):
Sound kind of bad, but I think it's true.
Speaker 1 (06:49):
It's partly my fault because I've done it in sort
of the cowardly.
Speaker 2 (06:52):
Way, like a little back doorway, like.
Speaker 1 (06:57):
I don't like sex, and that's how I didify asexuality.
Speaker 2 (07:00):
Is a thing, right, and then they'll be like yeah, sure.
Speaker 1 (07:03):
So it's sort of been like that kind of roundabout method.
So a lot of people who do know I'm a
sexual found out through the show. So what I'm saying
is basically, I've done it, and it kind of an
isolated environment, kind of a strange, strange way to do it,
but you know, every fuddy's story is different. I'm a
big believer in that. But and also the pandemic hit
(07:25):
like soon after, so I don't know, it's just felt
very I'm not sure lonely is the right word, but
I've still felt very unsure about it, and like I
couldn't claim it or someone would tell me I'm wrong,
like that's not a.
Speaker 2 (07:42):
Thing which people have.
Speaker 1 (07:44):
But but after I got all these people and I
saw these people following me back or following me, and
I was like, oh my god, this is a thing
and I've belong and I could like meet people who
are like me and it's not just me, and oh
my god, I sobbed. I sobbed the way and then
like I found out, I was so excited.
Speaker 2 (08:05):
I almost sent you this very long text and.
Speaker 1 (08:07):
I deleted it because I was like, you need to
calm down and think about this first.
Speaker 3 (08:10):
Come on.
Speaker 1 (08:24):
This is how I found out about Twittles because I
was like, oh, I could put the flag on mine
and then on my Twitter account and then I could
They would know, but twiddles.
Speaker 2 (08:34):
Is a whole thing, that's what they're called.
Speaker 1 (08:36):
Yeah, you told me about it, so we're gonna actually
be planning an episode on that. But those are basically
the icons you can have in your Twitter bio, and
it's kind of a politics game, sort of similar to
like emoji's about which ones are made which aren't. But
I found like the asexual flag with a bi romantic heart,
and it just so happened that night one of my
(08:58):
very favorite fan fiction authors sort of story about someone
who is asexual bi romantic.
Speaker 2 (09:02):
And it was so sweet. Oh my gosh.
Speaker 1 (09:05):
But like I know, the capitalization of Pride month is
a whole thing and it's a problem.
Speaker 2 (09:10):
But I bought a shirt.
Speaker 1 (09:11):
Everybody, I bought a shirt, an asexual Pride shirt, and
I bought some pins and I bought a flag.
Speaker 2 (09:16):
I was like, oh my god, and it was just
so nice.
Speaker 1 (09:19):
It was like something was clicking into place where it's
sort of just been slightly out of place this whole time.
And I all of you, we always say it, and
it's true. But so many of you have written in
and you've been so welcoming, and you've told me about
your own experience and even some of you specifically this
(09:41):
asexual biromantics experience or asexual spectrum at all, and it's.
Speaker 2 (09:45):
Been so nice.
Speaker 1 (09:47):
But I've still always felt like I haven't been in
this world long. I haven't known myself long enough. It's
not right for me to clean it. So it's it
was just it felt good. It felt good. I got
a bunch of pin We're gonna put.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
Them all over.
Speaker 3 (10:02):
I love it.
Speaker 1 (10:05):
Yeah, it was. It was really nice. It was like
an easing of tension, I guess. And all this just
came from seeing other people who are identify the same way.
So thank you, if you're listening, thank you. So sure
you had no idea this impact on me, but it did,
it did.
Speaker 2 (10:23):
So Yeah, I'm very excited. My shirt's coming in today.
Speaker 3 (10:25):
Okay, I was gonna say when is it coming in?
Speaker 1 (10:27):
It's coming in today, and I'm gonna rocket at the
beach because I'm about to go to the beach.
Speaker 2 (10:32):
Nice, you've got like an ACE card on it.
Speaker 3 (10:34):
You can take the flag too, yeah.
Speaker 1 (10:36):
Probably, but the ole the flag is a lot of
drama people.
Speaker 2 (10:40):
I'm sure you can imagine why. But I have family members.
Speaker 1 (10:43):
Who are not as cool with queer people, and it
CAUs there's a lot of gossip in trauma.
Speaker 2 (10:48):
But they wouldn't know what that flag was.
Speaker 3 (10:51):
Say, I wonder how many people would know what it is.
Speaker 1 (10:54):
I don't think they would know, but they would ask, eh, whatever,
we'll see how much drama.
Speaker 2 (11:00):
I want to call some of my beach trip oh oh,
I will, oh, I will. I'm excited for you to
see the shirt. Pretty cool. I think it's pretty cool.
Speaker 1 (11:11):
I did want to mention, very briefly, there has been
a lot of sad stuff during Pride this year, where
there's violence at Pride events and now with throw v
wait overturned. I've had a lot of friends who are
in gay marriages that are very scared. I've had friends
who've come out to their parents recently and partly because
of this, and haven't had a great reaction.
Speaker 2 (11:31):
But I don't know.
Speaker 1 (11:34):
I'm just we should talk about those things, and we
will talk about those things. But it is nice to
know that there's community and there is belonging. And thank you,
just thank you, thank you, to you. Samantha for being
so supportive on this whole thing with me listening to
all my stories.
Speaker 2 (11:54):
We're actually you're like, what is she talking about? But
I'm telling you it's good.
Speaker 1 (12:00):
Yes, so, and thank you to all of you listeners
because it really helped me and it's just like that
I get to share this story with all of you.
Speaker 3 (12:08):
So cheers, cheers, frand cheers.
Speaker 1 (12:12):
Yes And as always, we do love hearing from you.
If you would like to write to us, you can.
Our email is Stuff Media moms Stuff atiheartmeia dot com.
You can find us on Twitter at mom Stuff podcast
or on Instagram at stuff I Never Told You.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
Thanks. It's always to our super producer Christina. We love you,
Thank you, we do love you, and thank you.
Speaker 1 (12:32):
Yes, and thanks to you for listening Stuff I Never
told you protection, But iHeartRadio. For more podcasts from my
heart Radio, visit the heart Radio app Apple Podcasts, or
if you listen to your favorite shows
Hey, this is Annie and Samantha. Don't got to stephone
never told you production of iHeartRadio. And it is June
of twenty twenty three, which means we are in Pride month.
(00:26):
So we have a bunch of classics around pride, queer
stuff issues, all of that to come. Unfortunately, there's a
lot of bad news have to talk about, but we
will talk about it.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
Started.
Speaker 1 (00:44):
This isn't really bad news, but I got this headline
that the day because Google sends me these updates even
though I've tried to turn it off several times. Apparently
there's a trend. Have you heard of this, Samantha, the
good luck dying alone? No, apparently it's just apparently people
(01:11):
online are just getting into fights about people who are
single and happy and saying good luck diying alone, which
of course they are, of course they are. So as
someone who feels pretty confident through the show, you all
heard me kind of coming out and realizing I'm asexual
(01:36):
and still like pondering some of the specifics, but you know,
good luck dying alone, I say, I will have my
friends by my.
Speaker 2 (01:49):
Side, exactly. Yes.
Speaker 1 (01:53):
Yes, So there are a couple of classics I wanted
to bring back around just my my kind of coming out.
So here's the first one. Please enjoy. Hey, this is
Annie and Samantha, and welcome to stuff. I never told
(02:13):
you a protection of iHeart radio. And it's time for
another happy hour, and this one's gonna be mostly happy.
Speaker 2 (02:29):
Although there will be some unhappy parts of it. I'm
mostly happy.
Speaker 3 (02:34):
Is that another segment?
Speaker 2 (02:37):
How it should be? I like it. I think that's
more accurate to most of the h that's always.
Speaker 1 (02:45):
If you are choosing to drink, please do so responsibly.
Speaker 2 (02:49):
Samantha, what are you sipping on?
Speaker 3 (02:51):
Uh? You know, I discovered the Brooklyn Summer Pale all.
It is nice and crisp and low abb Uh it's
called the Sunny Pill l and thoroughly. So that's what
I'm drinking on today. What about you?
Speaker 2 (03:05):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (03:06):
Well, I just lamented to you that I have no
cold drinks available to me right now, so I am
drinking boxed red wine in my delicious hot hot studio closet.
Speaker 3 (03:19):
You could, you know, fancy it up, but I think ice.
Speaker 1 (03:22):
I've never added ice to straight boxed red wine, and
I have to say my immediate reaction is like recoiling.
Speaker 4 (03:31):
Drinking box wine baby boo. I mean no hate on
box wine. I love some boxed wine. I'm just saying that's.
Speaker 3 (03:37):
What's making you recoil.
Speaker 2 (03:38):
I think you'll be okay. But I get you. I
get you. Yeah, like a sangria. Yeah, I get it.
I mean it's true, You're right. Maybe I'm drawing lines
or they don't need to thank you, thank you. I
mean it's not.
Speaker 1 (03:52):
Bad, but it is quite hot, and I would love
a refreshing, cool beverage, right alas Olas, Well, so today's
July fifth, so we're out of Pride month.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
But I did want to do kind of a little update.
Speaker 1 (04:07):
That I shared with Samantha because it's sort of a
powerful moment I experienced recently, and it happened after we
had our now real friend, I know, I r L
friend Kate Osborne, who was a guest on this show
a couple whiles back. We met at a restaurant and
we had a lovely lunch together, delicious. We did we
(04:29):
made a friend as an adult, Samantha, Yeah, we did it.
Speaker 2 (04:33):
We did that too. You and I were.
Speaker 3 (04:35):
Yes, I mean, like a few of them, and it's
nice to have.
Speaker 1 (04:42):
It is funny though, because it feels like a setup
in a weird way. You and I kind of happened naturally,
But a lot of times when I've personally made friends
as an adult, it's felt kind of like a setup
or something.
Speaker 2 (04:53):
What if they don't like me?
Speaker 4 (04:58):
I mean to be fair, we did sit like we
were interviewing Kate at one pos, so that was super awkward.
Speaker 1 (05:03):
It was awkward, but it was It turned out to
be lovely and it was great. I think we're going
to hang out again, you know, fingers crossed. I don't
think she's lying to us, but.
Speaker 2 (05:14):
I hope not.
Speaker 1 (05:15):
But she posted about the episode we did together on
ADHD and Sex and also the episode I was on
on her show about just D and D and fangirl stuff.
And after that, I got a lot of followers, A lot.
I mean for me, a lot is like five to ten.
And that's essentially what happened. But yeah, that's a lot.
Speaker 2 (05:36):
That's a lot to me. And a lot of them
were ACE.
Speaker 1 (05:42):
They were asexual, and they kind of reached out to
me and we're like, oh, hi, I see you. No,
I nice to meet another person who's ACE. And I
broke down into tears. Samita.
Speaker 2 (05:52):
I started cry.
Speaker 1 (05:54):
Because I just like it felt like a belonging I
haven't felt because I've been I've told people I was
queer since high school, but it's always been something where
I've felt like I'm on the outskirts of it and
I had no right to claim the label, and like,
(06:15):
I don't know, like if I went to a Pride event,
they'd see me.
Speaker 2 (06:17):
And be like, no, you don't belong here. You are fake.
Speaker 1 (06:22):
And as I said in many of these episodes, I
didn't know a sexuality was a thing until twenty eleven
when I was working on this show. I didn't know
like there was a romantic spectrum until even later, I think.
And I pretty much came out to you all on
this podcast like that.
Speaker 2 (06:38):
Was my experience.
Speaker 1 (06:41):
I have come out to people in person since then,
but everyone I've come out to and this is this
is gonna.
Speaker 2 (06:47):
Sound kind of bad, but I think it's true.
Speaker 1 (06:49):
It's partly my fault because I've done it in sort
of the cowardly.
Speaker 2 (06:52):
Way, like a little back doorway, like.
Speaker 1 (06:57):
I don't like sex, and that's how I didify asexuality.
Speaker 2 (07:00):
Is a thing, right, and then they'll be like yeah, sure.
Speaker 1 (07:03):
So it's sort of been like that kind of roundabout method.
So a lot of people who do know I'm a
sexual found out through the show. So what I'm saying
is basically, I've done it, and it kind of an
isolated environment, kind of a strange, strange way to do it,
but you know, every fuddy's story is different. I'm a
big believer in that. But and also the pandemic hit
(07:25):
like soon after, so I don't know, it's just felt
very I'm not sure lonely is the right word, but
I've still felt very unsure about it, and like I
couldn't claim it or someone would tell me I'm wrong,
like that's not a.
Speaker 2 (07:42):
Thing which people have.
Speaker 1 (07:44):
But but after I got all these people and I
saw these people following me back or following me, and
I was like, oh my god, this is a thing
and I've belong and I could like meet people who
are like me and it's not just me, and oh
my god, I sobbed. I sobbed the way and then
like I found out, I was so excited.
Speaker 2 (08:05):
I almost sent you this very long text and.
Speaker 1 (08:07):
I deleted it because I was like, you need to
calm down and think about this first.
Speaker 3 (08:10):
Come on.
Speaker 1 (08:24):
This is how I found out about Twittles because I
was like, oh, I could put the flag on mine
and then on my Twitter account and then I could
They would know, but twiddles.
Speaker 2 (08:34):
Is a whole thing, that's what they're called.
Speaker 1 (08:36):
Yeah, you told me about it, so we're gonna actually
be planning an episode on that. But those are basically
the icons you can have in your Twitter bio, and
it's kind of a politics game, sort of similar to
like emoji's about which ones are made which aren't. But
I found like the asexual flag with a bi romantic heart,
and it just so happened that night one of my
(08:58):
very favorite fan fiction authors sort of story about someone
who is asexual bi romantic.
Speaker 2 (09:02):
And it was so sweet. Oh my gosh.
Speaker 1 (09:05):
But like I know, the capitalization of Pride month is
a whole thing and it's a problem.
Speaker 2 (09:10):
But I bought a shirt.
Speaker 1 (09:11):
Everybody, I bought a shirt, an asexual Pride shirt, and
I bought some pins and I bought a flag.
Speaker 2 (09:16):
I was like, oh my god, and it was just
so nice.
Speaker 1 (09:19):
It was like something was clicking into place where it's
sort of just been slightly out of place this whole time.
And I all of you, we always say it, and
it's true. But so many of you have written in
and you've been so welcoming, and you've told me about
your own experience and even some of you specifically this
(09:41):
asexual biromantics experience or asexual spectrum at all, and it's.
Speaker 2 (09:45):
Been so nice.
Speaker 1 (09:47):
But I've still always felt like I haven't been in
this world long. I haven't known myself long enough. It's
not right for me to clean it. So it's it
was just it felt good. It felt good. I got
a bunch of pin We're gonna put.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
Them all over.
Speaker 3 (10:02):
I love it.
Speaker 1 (10:05):
Yeah, it was. It was really nice. It was like
an easing of tension, I guess. And all this just
came from seeing other people who are identify the same way.
So thank you, if you're listening, thank you. So sure
you had no idea this impact on me, but it did,
it did.
Speaker 2 (10:23):
So Yeah, I'm very excited. My shirt's coming in today.
Speaker 3 (10:25):
Okay, I was gonna say when is it coming in?
Speaker 1 (10:27):
It's coming in today, and I'm gonna rocket at the
beach because I'm about to go to the beach.
Speaker 2 (10:32):
Nice, you've got like an ACE card on it.
Speaker 3 (10:34):
You can take the flag too, yeah.
Speaker 1 (10:36):
Probably, but the ole the flag is a lot of
drama people.
Speaker 2 (10:40):
I'm sure you can imagine why. But I have family members.
Speaker 1 (10:43):
Who are not as cool with queer people, and it
CAUs there's a lot of gossip in trauma.
Speaker 2 (10:48):
But they wouldn't know what that flag was.
Speaker 3 (10:51):
Say, I wonder how many people would know what it is.
Speaker 1 (10:54):
I don't think they would know, but they would ask, eh, whatever,
we'll see how much drama.
Speaker 2 (11:00):
I want to call some of my beach trip oh oh,
I will, oh, I will. I'm excited for you to
see the shirt. Pretty cool. I think it's pretty cool.
Speaker 1 (11:11):
I did want to mention, very briefly, there has been
a lot of sad stuff during Pride this year, where
there's violence at Pride events and now with throw v
wait overturned. I've had a lot of friends who are
in gay marriages that are very scared. I've had friends
who've come out to their parents recently and partly because
of this, and haven't had a great reaction.
Speaker 2 (11:31):
But I don't know.
Speaker 1 (11:34):
I'm just we should talk about those things, and we
will talk about those things. But it is nice to
know that there's community and there is belonging. And thank you,
just thank you, thank you, to you. Samantha for being
so supportive on this whole thing with me listening to
all my stories.
Speaker 2 (11:54):
We're actually you're like, what is she talking about? But
I'm telling you it's good.
Speaker 1 (12:00):
Yes, so, and thank you to all of you listeners
because it really helped me and it's just like that
I get to share this story with all of you.
Speaker 3 (12:08):
So cheers, cheers, frand cheers.
Speaker 1 (12:12):
Yes And as always, we do love hearing from you.
If you would like to write to us, you can.
Our email is Stuff Media moms Stuff atiheartmeia dot com.
You can find us on Twitter at mom Stuff podcast
or on Instagram at stuff I Never Told You.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
Thanks. It's always to our super producer Christina. We love you,
Thank you, we do love you, and thank you.
Speaker 1 (12:32):
Yes, and thanks to you for listening Stuff I Never
told you protection, But iHeartRadio. For more podcasts from my
heart Radio, visit the heart Radio app Apple Podcasts, or
if you listen to your favorite shows
Stuff Mom Never Told You News
Hosts And Creators
Anney Reese
Samantha McVey
Popular Podcasts
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
24/7 News: The Latest
The latest news in 4 minutes updated every hour, every day.
Therapy Gecko
An unlicensed lizard psychologist travels the universe talking to strangers about absolutely nothing. TO CALL THE GECKO: follow me on https://www.twitch.tv/lyleforever to get a notification for when I am taking calls. I am usually live Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays but lately a lot of other times too. I am a gecko.