Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hello the Internet, and welcome to every single light every
single night, I'll turn out. Uh, my name is Jack O'Brien's.
That's Miles Gray. We got Supercrucer on a Hosnier in
the studio. But she's not going to talk until we
get to the most important story of the day. And
just yeah, typically said, she's here for one story in
(00:23):
one story only. We'll talk about Yeah, talk about that
when we get to it. But up first, the number
one trending thing on Twitter on Google is Ulcer. Just say,
star Trek race yea no former Special envoy for Ukraine. Uh,
(00:45):
Kurt Volker. He is one of the three amigos, which
was himself, Gordon Solon and Rick Perry And anyway, that's
how we know him. He's one of the original liars. Yeah,
one of the gars. I said, is he a star
Trek Alien? Oh? Remember that. I tried to block that
out because I want to keep I want to have
respect for yourself. So with this his public testimony, he
(01:08):
came through and had like a couple of things he amended,
which was a little bit interesting. His original testimony was
that during a July tenth meeting with Ukrainians at the
White House investigations were not raised, he said, I nevery
I don't know anything about something about investigations. But now,
according to his opening statement, he has come to remember
(01:29):
that US Ambassador Gordon Salon did raise the topic, and
he also remembered that quote all of us at the
meeting found Salon's behavior to be quote inappropriate. But he
was also you know, throughout it. I mean, he also
made some changes about his testimony. Uh, about demands to
investigate the Bidens and demands to investigate Parismo were two
(01:50):
separate things. But then Tuesday, uh, he said today he
said that while he recalled that Giuliani and others were
demanding investigations into the gas company on whose board, Hunter
Biden said, Folker failed to connect an investigation into corruption
allegations at Barisma with a politically motivated attack on the Bidens.
So he's not really doing much explosive stuff. I mean,
(02:11):
the amendment, the amendments he did make show that he's
a little less willing to just outright lie. Um. And
then finally he was saying like he's like I just
want to say, like I just the reference to the
three Amigos, Like he it's just sickening to him because
the Three Amigos will always refer to Senator John McCain,
Senator Joe Lieberman, and Senator Lindsey Graham talking about the
(02:33):
support of the surge in Iraq. What a dude, Okay,
So anyway, yeah, not a lot there. I mean him
and Tim Morrison. Everyone's gonna be like, they're not going
to really do much here to to blow the lid
off of any of the White House talking points, but
the little little shreds of still saying shady a little bit.
There were shady things going on, whereas in the past
he was more uh in in lock stuff with yeah,
(02:55):
but he's trying to do that thing where he doesn't
want to say shady. So he's like, what's like two
degrees back from shady, like cloudy with a chance of shade.
M I don't know. So what is this? The USS
Enterprise tell a boy? Uh and I can you call
his doctor? He said United earlier? The United up next
(03:19):
is something I have no idea what this is. But
you jumped at the well, look at number two trending
things on Twitter. Potch, I'll go, oh, I know that
to be Mauricio Pochettino, the manager of Oh just this
the lesser club in North London in the Barclays Premier League,
Tottenham Hotspur. Uh, they have sacked their manager after a
(03:43):
string of bad performances. And to be completely fair, that
sounds like a headline that could describe the situation at Arsenal.
So you know, so leave me alone. I get it,
we're both in terrible places. However, I will always dance
on the grave of Tottenham Hotspur. That's is what it is. Okay,
I got Arsenal, todam my body? What do you think
it is? Um? I think the one thing a lot
(04:03):
of people are looking at is because there are a
lot of teams in the Premier League that have terrible coaches,
they're trying to maybe sack their managers as quickly as
possible because the market for available managers is like very
narrow in terms of the quality. So some people, like
even Arsenal fans like damn, they sacked their manager before
we could sack ours, because they might get a shot
at a better manager than we can. There's like a
(04:23):
finite list of good manager There's only like maybe three
or four people who you would trust. I mean with
the aspirations that Tottenham have and the aspirations that Arsenal have,
Like we're looking at sort of the same kind of manager.
So where would you put football, Like, I think in
terms of how much a coach can affect the outcome,
like in American Yeah, yeah, America's Big Three, I'd say
(04:45):
it's probably football basketball than baseball. Like baseball you can
manage with like a spreadsheet, Yeah yeah, I mean no,
I mean with footie, you got to have a great
manager because part of that is understanding, like tactically, what
you're best set up is how to use their players
the best way. Our current manager, Unai Emery, can't seem
to do that if his life depended on it. So
(05:05):
pretty soon maybe I will be talking about why Emery
out is trending because we might be looking at getting
rid of our own manager. But still, uh, it's really
you hate to see Mauricio Pacucchino go. The fans liked him,
the players really liked him, and he still didn't win anything.
Good luck to you, sir. So he just got axed
despite being popular. That that's rare that somebody a coach
(05:28):
remains popular with the fans after his team starts. You know,
they went to the Champions League final last season, which
you know, credit to them. Arsenal isn't even in the
Champions League. So you're like, I'll flame myself before the
fans get to me. But uh, that's a pretty big
deal to get to the final. But they lost to
Liverpool ultimately, and to be able to just sack him
the next season shows ruthlessness at the Tottenham board. And
(05:49):
also I think you know they're they want to get
in the Champions Yeah, they're not a family like Arsenal. Yeah,
but look, my god, if if we could do it,
I could do it daily me just crying about Arsenal thing,
and the Tottenham fans will also tune into that and
we'll we'll win. Uh And just in case anybody thinks
you are biased in one way or another, at the
beginning of this, right up on our docks says Tottenham
(06:11):
is scum in all caps. Yeah, so yeah, what do
you think of Tottenham? Ship? What do you think of ship? Totten?
Thank you? That's all right. Yeah. One thing that was
trending on Twitter was two thousand nine verse two thousand nineteen. Uh,
(06:32):
and I that that makes sense? Is that just people
get tenure gap photos, but yeah, and like some people
are like, look, I am still working with helicopters, but
some people are like, hey, I'm an adult now and
I used to be a kid. And that was like
a big thing on Like there was a top trending
article on BuzzFeed last week was like celebrities who look
(06:56):
way different than they did in two thousand nine, and
it was all a celebrities who are between nineteen and
twenty two, and it was all just like, look at
this guy. He wasn't even a teenager yet, Wow, you
believe look at him now he's a dad. That's weird.
Look at this kid? Um? What the glow up was real?
Becoming a adult people, the human body changes a lot
(07:18):
during that period. How do you think you we should
we do tenure gap photos? How much I've Yeah, since
I made that deal with Satan, that's right. I uh
me and Farrell in that waiting room. I just I
don't know if I can do with that many more
exposures of pictures of me in cargo shorts. But you
(07:41):
were wearing cargo shirts ten years ago, were you? Oh boy? Okay,
well we'll leave that for let's actually move on to
the real pressing story. Yeah, it's the big story of
the day. Uh it is. You know how there is
that show that is a terrible reference. There was that
show the slap. Well, this is the fart and DCS
(08:01):
the fart and superducer on any is here because that
was the worst far That was the worst fart. I
can't you can't, partner, you can't. How do you interact
with baby? I don't know how to spit all over him?
(08:23):
You legitimately can't do it, or you can just do
it with your lips like that was a legit farting.
So the story is, uh, Congressman Eric Swalwell, we gotta
play this was on hard Ball with Chris Matthews and
just listen to what this is and you tell me
what happened. Is uncontradicted that the president used taxpayer dollars
(08:45):
to ask the Ukrainians to help him cheat an election. Okay,
how about one more time, Okay, just one more time
for the record. Evidence is uncontradicted that the president used
taxpayer dollars to ask the Ukrainians to help him cheat
an election. And the complaint that I've heard, Okay, so
a lot of people are like this motherfucker farted on air,
(09:05):
straight up, straight up. I thought I thought it was
one of those videos like The Farting Preacher where where
people like, added fart sounds definitely sounds fake because it's
so loud and problem. But the thing is, when you
watch him right, even when you hear the he pauses,
he pause too far, and it almost feels if it
(09:27):
was a true fart, that his pelvis was projected slightly
forward due to the force out of his butt, which
leaves me to believe it's real. Okay, now there's a
couple of explanations. What Eric Swallow just denies it, right,
Eric Wallwell statement on the matter, Official statement from the
office of Congressman riks It was not me five exclamation points,
(09:48):
and I didn't hear it when I was speaking, So
why do you stop talking then? Bro? Also, that's not
a good argument. I didn't hear it when I was talking.
That doesn't You don't need to say that I didn't
did anything that makes you be like, yo, you farted,
then I didn't hear that. We smelt it. Yeah. Well,
then the explanation from the producers at hard Ball was
(10:11):
that someone was sliding a coffee mug along the on
the broadcast desk. Now, with that in mind, listen again,
close your eyes and imagine that sound of a ceramic
mug going across the table. Is uncontradicted that the President
used taxpayer dollars to ask the Ukrainians to help them
cheat an election. One more time an election? Okay, one
more time an election and one more cheat. It sounds
(10:35):
like you're scooting a desk. Oh, the four times didn't
get it up to that part. Wait mug, Yeah, I
can kind of hear it, but it's just so. It's
like one of those videos where if they like play
the sound effect, then it sounds like the ball is
hitting the thing like it's there. There are these videos
(10:57):
where like your visuals and the sounds like play off
of each other, so they'll play the same they'll play
the same sound, but in one like it looks like
a ball is bouncing and in another it doesn't look
like that. But your brain will adapt. Or, for instance,
it will show you two different mouths, and if the
mouth is making the F sound, you will totally hear
(11:19):
an F sound. Eyes and brain are wired. But this
one we're just using our ears. Baby, One more time
to ask the Ukrainians to help him cheat. Okay, I personally,
I think it's great if he's farting. I think we
should be allowed to just let one rip, if we
need to let one rip, and we should thank you,
(11:40):
says the producer who farts a lot in that back room,
right and during the show we have to constantly edit
it out. That's why people don't know we have that
glass door. Let's keep the farts. I think it's because
impeachment is me. It's I don't know what to believe.
I would believe. I would believe that he that it
(12:03):
was the mug slide across the thing and he heard
it and that's why I stopped talking. But he said
he didn't hear anything. Well, here's the gap. I don't
think he the Ukrainians to help him cheating. Intellect It's
like he know he created the runway from Honestly, I
think it's a better story if you farted, And I
think that would help him a lot. It makes him
(12:23):
relevant again, Yeah, exactly, not the guy who like ran
for president For point two seconds. I can't because it
feels like this gap and when he stops speaking and
when that mug fart far. When the mug farts, it's
to the right on the notes, like he can't be
reacting that quickly and he's farting. It really sounds like
(12:44):
it sounds like if I was gonna you know, and
I'm trying to I just want to talk about they
like it has that vibe of soon trying to let
you know their farting. Yeah, giving you room because I've
been there. I can't keep up a conversation and fart
at the same time, Like, I have to focus on
getting the fart out. Wait, your priority is to fart
even no matter the context. You won't you won't try
and let it cross outside that as much outside but
(13:07):
at home when talking to my partner, Yeah, like we're
in the middle something. We don't have time to you
gotta get your fart out, Yeah, we gotta keep it moving. Yeah,
And then do you say something funny like what was
that who stepped on a bullfrog? Or like no classics,
you always blame it on the pets. Here, got to
be like look at these that's what her majesty will
do on a cat. I'm like, that's low cat. You
(13:28):
do nothing to You are my my grandpa When he farts,
who go, uh, but that would be in response told
who was that? My dad doesn't say anything and when
we go like dude, don't be like, oh sorry, I
just haven't even heard to him that. All right, Well, guys,
(13:52):
we're not going to solve this one today and people
are going to be puzzling over this, like does it
proveder film for years, so just let us know what
you think, yeah or don't. I'm at Jack Undersquore O'Brien
on Twitter and my Miles and great and everything alright,
and I'm at part hosting just joking at Anta host
can you should get that handle book. We'll be back
(14:15):
tomorrow with another podcast