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May 2, 2024 67 mins
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Speaker 1 (00:05):
Also, your voice sounds super sexy. What kind of microphone
are you on?

Speaker 2 (00:09):
Oh? Boy, man, real easy, that's that's a that's a
proprietary secret. That's Joe's whole secret. Man. Like, well, yeah, man,
how what kind of sexy as Mike? You guys?

Speaker 3 (00:20):
Yeah, I mean I just a sexy tron five thousand?

Speaker 2 (00:23):
Is that?

Speaker 1 (00:24):
Like old?

Speaker 2 (00:25):
Yeah? I thought it was the fucka tron three hundred,
But it's a second.

Speaker 3 (00:29):
I stopped using that one a while, okay, just out
of you know, growing up.

Speaker 2 (00:33):
So yeah, no, that's true. Yeah, I guess that that
says more about me than anything. Still using the fuck tron?

Speaker 3 (00:39):
Whatever works?

Speaker 2 (00:46):
Hello, Internet, and welcome to season three, thirty six, Episode
four of the Dailies. That guys, it's a production of iHeartRadio,
and obviously this is the podcast where we take a
deep dive into America's shared consciousness. It's Thursday a second,
twenty twenty four, and I'm doing my best to sound
as sexy on Mike as possible. My name is Miles

Gray AKA oh Ship. Where's my AKA here? It is?
Oh shit? Now that discord is reloading and I lost
my fucking place. Keep this in. This is part of
the matter.

Speaker 1 (01:16):
This is a log AKA, this is a yeah, this
is all.

Speaker 2 (01:22):
AKA, oh fuck, where's my fucking shit?

Speaker 3 (01:25):

Speaker 2 (01:26):
AKA we got a rats, I got a plan to
get him out of here. Mayor Adams is the problem.
He's keeping rats in his own house, throwing them out
with carbon monoxide. That'll work for a little while until
they find a new place, too high A kay, thank
you so much. That's First Blood five to two two
on the Discord. Look, it's been a while since we

were doing the Fast Car sort of, you know, rewritings,
and yeah, the story about New York's rats are who
was apparently fucking up because people are getting sick with
I forget lepto perosis, I believe is like a bacterial
infection you can only get from interacting with ratpe. So
that's how bad things are there. It's really more again

like when you're saying, more a bummer story about New
York in general. But anyway, that's enough for me. I
am thrilled to be joined. Oh shit, I forgot even
to god, see, this is what happens when I'm running
the show. I forgot to tell people what May second was.
It's National Life Insurance Day. Just you guys can get it.
Get your fucking affairs in order. It's also national Yeah,
get your shit together. You better get that life insurance policy.

Tell your friends so then maybe you might you know whatever.
I've seen enough datline to know what happens when you
got a good life insurance policy. H and also National
truffle Day. But not like the fancy shits that you
shave on the pasta that we're talking about, like the
chocolates that have the shits inside that are the good ones.
I think that's what I always called the troubles the
good ones. Anyway, I'm thrilled to be joined by today's

guest co host, one of the most mysterious men in
podcasting and someone who deals with the dark arts of
Corvid training. Knows how to commune with crows. He's also
the host, one of the hosts of the hits show
Stuff They Don't Want You to Know. He's also an author.
He's also got a pretty I guess marginal a sexy
microphone right now, but that's okay, but please welcome to

the microphone, mister Benbulla. Hey, hey, welcome back.

Speaker 4 (03:18):
Heah akas got ak Yeah, well I get it. I
could do aka, let's see in service to your great
tradition of naming the days, miles, it is also International
Scurvy Awareness Day, So doctor scurvy.

Speaker 2 (03:35):
Yeah, yeah, you weren't aware. You weren't aware them. May
second is scurvy Awareness Day.

Speaker 3 (03:40):
This is why we do it.

Speaker 2 (03:41):
Yeah, exactly. Holy shit, I'm sorry, is scurvy? I'm sorry?
Am I ignorant in thinking that like that shit's for
pirates and like people on ships or like that? Are
we still fucking like? I guess it's part of malnutrition.
I don't know.

Speaker 1 (03:56):
It's a common Uh, it's a common stereotype and misconception
that I am, my colleagues labor against.

Speaker 2 (04:01):
So we're raising awareness of it.

Speaker 1 (04:03):
Yes, please consume some citrus of your of your choice.

Speaker 2 (04:09):
I don't know how long. Isn't that we're like the
where they started they call people liamis yeah, as a
scurvy reference.

Speaker 1 (04:17):
Yeah, I think so, because when you were on like
we associate this with high racy, but we should associate
it also with just that age of a bunch of
people consentially or non consentually on boats in the neighbor
I appreciate it. Yes, yeah, oh god? And and what
they they eventually discovered without getting the whole story. You know, pirates,

especially even if they chose to be on the ship,
they're kind of living rough life. They're kind of always
on so h So it took a while to realize
the source of why they were getting cartoonishly loose teeth
and all these other scurvy things.

Speaker 2 (04:58):
Like you know how to lose xylophone? Like, yeah, exactly,
and now I'm realizing too. The nickname came from American
sailors who like didn't believe that taking like eating citrus
with would Ward.

Speaker 1 (05:10):
Off screen, were anti vaxers for citrus.

Speaker 2 (05:15):
Fucking clowns, American sailors. Come on, man, anyway, Ben, We're
thrilled to be joined in our third seat by a
repeat guest. It's a very funny, very funny person, very
funny comedian hails from the Pittsburgh area. I was just
just celebrating a video that they did about I think.
I don't know if sorry if I completely misnamed the title,

but it felt like two guys from Pittsburgh talking about
seeing Oppenheimert basically yeah, yeah, and you can catch this
man May tenth at the Alameda Comedy Club. Shoutout arias
I gang, I'm looking at you. You better pull up. And also,
if you're in Saratoga Springs, New York, May thirty, first
you will be able to catch our guests. Joe Cuzolo, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe.

Speaker 3 (05:56):
Hello Joe, Hey, it's me aka Vitamin C proficient.

Speaker 2 (06:03):
Oh there we go. I love man. I used to
drink so much orange juice, like as a kid. I
don't know why. I'm like, I don't know I had
that memory, but I just think of like that minute
made vitamin D enriched fucking orange juice that I would
just fuck it down.

Speaker 3 (06:20):
Yeah, And it is because well, I think especially, I
think there's something about like that era where we thought,
like orange juice. The commercials tell me it's the best
possible thing I can put my body. Yeah, now we're like,
it's the sugariest thing with nah almost no, Like the
nutritional value is completely canceled out by the Yeah.

Speaker 2 (06:40):
You will get survy from drinking yeah all the way
back around. Yeah, we should have.

Speaker 1 (06:47):
We should have known it was a grift when Sonny
D came out as like a hip competitor, right, is
a chef?

Speaker 3 (06:55):

Speaker 2 (06:55):
Have you had the fucking boozy sunny D that they sell. Now,
excuse me, I thought that was dude. No, they have
like a canned hard Seltzer sunny D. It's pretty I've
I had a sip. I was like, it actually pays
off on the promise, like it's boozy, bubbly sunny D
sonny D Vodka Seltzer. Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. The working

parents screwdriver, I think it's what we call that.

Speaker 3 (07:22):
And it's sunny D. It's not sunny delight for the
for the faga Seltzer. They go full sunny D mm hmmmmm,
which is smart. They respected, Yeah, that it's so funny.
I was in the same like that misconception about like,
well it's juice. It was like one hundred percent juice,
and like commercial was like the guy put a straw
in an orange, so it's basically like the inside of
an orange right in here.

Speaker 2 (07:43):
Yeah. Yeah, oh added sugar. What's that.

Speaker 3 (07:47):
Strong ad campaign? I recalled. They really were going for
it in terms of brainwashing the youth. Oh yeah, orange juice.

Speaker 2 (07:55):
I mean our parents too, Like my mom was like, yeah,
that's fine, it's not soda, right, I'm like, no, Mom,
it's minute he says, right there, there's hue, What the
fuck a thing? Just a little spicy exactly, then down
a half gallon while watching fucking South Park or some shit.

Speaker 1 (08:10):
Still not as creepy as the Got Milk commercials. Just
to be honest, you're looking back, I learned a lot well.

Speaker 2 (08:16):
I learned who Aaron Burr was because of those commercials.

Speaker 1 (08:18):
Short plication was creepy because it was a Trede association, right,
it wasn't a company.

Speaker 3 (08:25):
It probably it was the Dairy Farmers Association of America.

Speaker 1 (08:29):
It was just the idea of milk, Do you have it?
Or are you a loser?

Speaker 2 (08:33):
Got? Do you have this?

Speaker 3 (08:34):

Speaker 2 (08:35):
No? Then you might be in a full body cast
having convulsions like what was that one? Oh? The guy
was in the full body cast and then they brought
like cookies, right, and he needed like milk and he
was like, dude, that one's actually pretty horrific.

Speaker 3 (08:50):
A lot of the milk ads I'm realizing are about
people and their failure to communicate. Right, it's the only
thing getting in a way of people in their milk. Yeah, truly,
it should just be got a therapist? Are you able
to voice their needs?

Speaker 2 (09:03):

Speaker 3 (09:03):
Yeah, maybe got a clear passageway between your mouth and
people's ears, right, Yeah, but yeah, we had beef. It's
what's for dinner occasionally, you get you get those, right,
you get the Yeah, it's just from a product, it's
just from yeah a yeah.

Speaker 2 (09:19):
Like and it wasn't.

Speaker 1 (09:20):
Yeah, pork was like the other Yeah, I think had
had their time.

Speaker 3 (09:27):

Speaker 2 (09:27):
The fabric of our lives, Yeah, there it is there. Yeah,
we're a fabric of our undoing, potentially because we haven't
quite we quite haven't reconciled our differences with King Cotton heavily.
But anyway, that is enough of that. We got to
tell the people what we're going to be talking about today.
Looks like the Dems are pulling a bit of an
Avenger ship. They're coming out the portals to help poor

speaker Mike Johnson from being ousted. So we will talk
about why the Democrats are like, yeah, I guess we'll
fucking save mister Jesus jerk off app from completely screwing
up Congress. We'll get into those details. We're gonna talk
about the So basically, there was another full on clearing
of protesters at Columbia University for the second time, and

the NYPD is doing there doing what cops like to do,
which is be like and our violence was justified because
of this object we found or place.

Speaker 1 (10:21):
You could buy at any store.

Speaker 3 (10:23):
Hey, hey, buy any store.

Speaker 2 (10:27):
Hey, what do you some kind of frigging comy? Get
the fuck out of here?

Speaker 3 (10:31):
We go all some anarchy headquarters.

Speaker 2 (10:33):
This guy works for a big bike lock. You know,
look at this ship. If it wasn't dangerous, why would't
they call it kryptonite exactly? Because it's gonna it's it's
you could defeat Superman or maybe it's a brand name.
I don't know, but we'll talk about their latest push
to try and completely obscure and obfuscate around the student protests,

and then the we gotta talk. There's talk now about
how we might be saved from clim a change because
we're gonna do carbon capture. This is something that keeps
happening that most people know isn't really that effective.

Speaker 1 (11:08):
So the autonomist loves it.

Speaker 2 (11:10):
Oh yeah, of course anything that's like, well, don't turn
off that revenue stream? Is there? Can we invent a
fake solution? Was that called carbon sequestration?

Speaker 1 (11:18):

Speaker 2 (11:19):
Yeah, yeah, we're doing that we're doing that. So we'll
get into that and many other fun things. But first
jokeaz alla Pittsburgh's very own. First of all, what's the
best thing to eat in Pittsburgh that isn't parogi or
Permanny brothers?

Speaker 3 (11:33):
Uh catch up?

Speaker 2 (11:36):

Speaker 3 (11:37):
The reason I say that is because there's a lot
of pride for Hines.

Speaker 2 (11:41):

Speaker 3 (11:42):
I was famously bottled in Pittsburgh for a long time.
Heinz Field once was the name of the I don't
live there anymore, but I am positive whatever the Heinz
Field is called now, which was a recent change, and
they're not if it's acroshure or whatever like, they are
calling it hines Field till the end of time, until
it is rightfully re renamed Hinesfield. Sum, No, it's no

bad ye, but yet there's a lot of pride for
hines I even think they you can sell hines for
like a little bit more because they know pittsburghs are
going to buy it. And this might be that I
am taking it face value from my parents who switched

to Hunts, which was I was like, we got Hunts.
When I was back visiting, I was like, what are
you guys doing? They were like, here's the deal crisis here. Yeah,
they don't bottle it in Pittsburgh anymore, so you're not
supporting the local economy. And then two, they can sell
Hines more expensive in the stores because the brand loyalty
is so huge. So we were like, why are we

why we have any loyalty, it's not even a local
thing anymore. So on the Hunts train and I said, well,
it does taste exactly the same, So yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 (13:04):
That's fucking wild. I mean, I'm I'm sure there's varying
levels of that wherever you go, where they're like what
the locals they fucking think this is like religious ship.
So yeah, charge of fifteen. It is weird, though. I
am pretty Heinz loyal too, Like I think just growing
up in diners and ship and like seeing that bottle
and like learning, yeah, this is it. There's only one ketchup.

Speaker 3 (13:31):
And they seem it's does seem like a classy brand,
like it never tried to change the design of the
regular Heinz bottle. I'm pretty sure they did get in
on the like purple ketchup. They did cranch, they didn't
mess with the design of just regular old ketchup.

Speaker 2 (13:53):

Speaker 3 (13:53):
Yeah, they've definitely done some like Mayosterre Mustarday. Yeah, yeah exactly,
but the the bottle that you see at the restaurant
has pretty much looked the same, yeah for century.

Speaker 1 (14:06):
Yeah, and the balls of that ad campaign to where
they had you know, they had that meeting where they said,
people are explaining about how it's tough to get the
ketchup out of the bottle sometime, and then some guy went,
fuck it, let's make that a feature, you know what
I mean, just tell them they have to wait.

Speaker 2 (14:21):
Yeah, that was like exactly. I remember thinking like I
hacked the matrix when I would see adults chugling, like
you actually have to top to fifty seven, They're like,
shut up, ten year old.

Speaker 3 (14:33):
Let me tell you how it's done on the playground.

Speaker 1 (14:35):
Okay, Yeah, this guy was an old school diner veteran.
We were like a grizzled emperor of condiments and.

Speaker 2 (14:43):
I don't know, Hey, look man, they just they were
they were they were inviting dupars. That was like the
spot in LA and they fucking turned it into anyway
we can get into how our old haunts are used
to what they used to be. You know what I
mean all day here, but we got to get into
this question joke, Pazala, What is some from your search
history that's revealing about who you are or something you
recently screenshoted on your phone? Either?

Speaker 1 (15:05):

Speaker 3 (15:06):
Oh interesting, well I the I looked at my Google
history and one of the most recent things I did
search was can you bring a plant back from the
brink of death?

Speaker 2 (15:16):

Speaker 3 (15:16):
Man, Yeah, because my girlfriend was out of town for
the last month, and oh I was tasked with taking
care of many things, which I did, but there was
one plant in the corner that just was not part
of my routine. Yeah, you know, and I listen. I
kept her. I kept her sour dough starter alive. I

did that. That was did you ask? It involves scooping
flower into the discard. There's all sorts of steps. I
took a video of her explaining it to me and
then just like would play it and then just be like,
oh they smart. Scoop a starter, put it into a
new jar, put a flower into that jar, mix it up,
make have it on the scales. You know exactly how

my you're putting in there? Oh shit, like lid wait
and tilt. Is this like a like an heirloom starter
or just like just like a pandemic. This it was
before the pandemic, but it was not like from Grandpapa
right right right, just like.

Speaker 2 (16:15):
A smuggled across oceans.

Speaker 3 (16:17):
Yeah, but it has stayed alive for a good five
years at this point.

Speaker 2 (16:22):
So nice.

Speaker 3 (16:23):
I don't want to be the one. If I'm gonna
kill anything, it's gonna go to be the plant.

Speaker 2 (16:26):
I like that. Yeah, you're like putting yourself in like
that sitcom situation where it's like you lost the dog
and now you gotta find like a dog like looks
the same, hopefully get one over. And it's like drinking.

Speaker 3 (16:36):
I mean, what like is it are we Is it
fully fucking gone? Or you know, I don't think we're
fully gone. Okay, So I did learn a thing or two,
like if stuff, if leaves are particularly are like fully dead,
you chop those off. Yep, the plant isn't confused to
be like give them some water and then yeah, and
so I did. I got some water in there and

did see a little bit of a rejuvent structure. So
I was like, I think we're good. Some leaves are
definitely not looking so hot, but I think it was
the brink. We did not pass through the brink. So okay, good.

Speaker 1 (17:11):
Now your girlfriend may hear this show. Have you told her.

Speaker 3 (17:18):
This is Ai? This is all AI, so easy?

Speaker 2 (17:24):
Yeah, I love that one. Now, Joe, what is something
you think is under rated?

Speaker 3 (17:30):
I think we under rate the toll and task of
the food delivery driver. And I know there was some
discourse about this recently in food delivery in general online,
And I've always felt this way because I used to
drive for Postmates years ago, and I always felt like

the understanding that food delivery is an extreme luxury had
never really been fully understood by the consumer.

Speaker 2 (18:04):

Speaker 3 (18:04):
Yeah, I just have memories of like picking up truly
like not no disrespect, but Panda express things of this nature,
driving to a disrespect to the.

Speaker 2 (18:19):
To the people over at Panda.

Speaker 3 (18:21):
But then going to like a terribly difficult area of
town to park, like if people know La, like a
place like Korea town, having to having no choice but
to park in front of a fire hydrant, in front
of a massive tower, going inside the tower, having to
check in with security, having to wait for them to

activate one of the elevators, which is always they Yeah,
it's always a thing and it takes a really long time,
and then you finally get in there, you go up
to whatever floor they're on, you get off, and then
you have to navigate the labyrinth that is the gigantic
apartment complex, go to the front door to deliver Panda
Express to their front door, and there is Listen, I

don't need a cheerful thank you necessarily. But then when
you go back in your car, see that you have
a ticket and this has taken twenty minutes off of
the clock and they did not tip you, and you
made three dollars. I think it needs to be hammered
home that if you're participating in this charade, if you're

participating this and this is so like extremely taxing and
stressful activity for the driver to understand what that's doing
and to tip them like essentially one hundred percent, Like
there is no I know a lot of people online
were like, well, what if you're neurodivergent and you have
to do this, And it's like, listen, that's not what
we're talking about, because I know mo majority yeah, like

if there's some sort of disability or whatever, that's a
different conversation. But I know that there's just a lot
of people who just feel entitled to get food delivered
to their door.

Speaker 2 (20:00):
Yeah, and not.

Speaker 3 (20:01):
Have to pay for the fact that that is the
most luxurious thing.

Speaker 1 (20:05):
Yeah, Oh for sure.

Speaker 2 (20:06):
It is wild because people like well it said the
delivery few was like forty nine cents plus like those fees, Like,
I'm that's like, isn't that like you're pay It's like no, man,
that's they're getting a fraction.

Speaker 3 (20:16):
Of that, and they think about as do it exactly
like these apps are able to skirt minimum wage.

Speaker 2 (20:23):
Yah. Yeah, these aren't employees. These are independent contractors that
don't fuck. It's also brutal.

Speaker 1 (20:30):
Also, I just can't imagine the lack of awareness or
the evil balls it would take. I would be horrified
to not tip someone doing that knowing the knowing like
the way that kind of system has been constructed, Yeah,
to ship on the people working there.

Speaker 2 (20:51):
For sure. But I think that's it. That's like the
genius of so many of like these apps and things.
It's like they obscure the toll that it takes on
the human being for you to get your fucking, you know,
fucking cell phone case that you want it on Prime
they or you know, getting door dashed. It just feels like,
I don't know, I pressed a button and then like
because I put like, don't even talk to me, just

leave it at the door, and it just appears. And
I know, not of the person on the other side
who's like having to deal with the same fucking gas
prices that everyone else does and is getting Yeah an agree. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (21:23):
And if I can, uh, you know, proselytize a little bit,
I would advocate for meeting your driver maybe out on
the road. And if you don't want to do that,
and you live in an apartment building, at least in
the lobby.

Speaker 2 (21:36):
Walked out, just walk down. Yeah, make it.

Speaker 3 (21:38):
Easier for them so they also turn over, turnover, turn,
and it's it's good for you as well because you
don't have to like wonder if they're going to be
able to find your door. Like, just make it easy
so that you get your food faster and then come
back up. The other thing I will say is, if
you're doing delivery food, really reconsider getting a drink or

a milkshake because those are very difficult to transport.

Speaker 2 (22:04):

Speaker 3 (22:04):
I don't think people immediately consider that, but when you
have a bag of food you put in the passenger
seat or you put it on the floor. It's easy.
But if you have something you're juggling that could spill,
it's very difficult, not only to place in your car
as you're transporting it, but then as you're trying to
pick it up and then open your door and then
close the car door and then lock it and then

get to then open the door of the building. All
this stuff if you're juggling like a big frothy milkshake,
that's just in.

Speaker 2 (22:33):
Seventeen frappuccinos that you ordered, Yes, exactly, Yeah, there have
you seen. There's a subreddit called door dash Gremlin and
it's as people who like when they get the like
the food dropped off, like if they're verifying that it's
dropped off for the photo. It's people that have been
caught getting the bag from the door while the photo's
being taken, so like rather than like the photo of

like a bag by the door, it's like someone like
in just a T shirt like Winnie the Poo style,
like they're about like ah, and so people like when
they end up being a gremlin, they usually upload it
and it's always funny to see and like that. That's
when you can tell you're like, man, was it really?
Did you really have to get that delivery? But I
get it sometimes, but look, if you're gonna do it

at least fucking tip and cost is.

Speaker 3 (23:19):
Like that, acknowledge the way to do it a luxury?

Speaker 2 (23:21):
Yeah, in a in a fair equitable way. Uh. What's
something you think is overrated?

Speaker 3 (23:26):
And I'm gonna sound like such a little boy here, Okay,
making your bed? I do think making your bed is overrated, though,
I just don't kind of understand the weight that some
people put on it.

Speaker 1 (23:40):
Is it too like Sisphian for you, Like it's just
gonna be unmade again?

Speaker 2 (23:45):

Speaker 3 (23:46):
Like no, it's not like people who happen to come
to my home are going to see it. Only I
and my girlfriend are going to see what our room
looks like, let alone the bed and then to just
like I I just don't fully get the point of
like I'll maybe just kind of like very loosely like

put things back in the direction that they need to go.
But in terms of like talking and making sure every
I'm not sure why that's so crucial to a lifestyle.

Speaker 2 (24:22):
I'm I'm guessing your girlfriend is pro bed making.

Speaker 3 (24:26):
Interesting, that's what an interesting concept.

Speaker 2 (24:30):
She she is or she aligned with you, Yeah, because
I'm I'm in a similar situation she is.

Speaker 3 (24:34):
And I will, you know, entertain this fancy grade.

Speaker 2 (24:41):

Speaker 3 (24:44):
But I'm just kind of like I don't really.

Speaker 2 (24:47):
Yeah, it's like sloppy boy life, you know, like because
I'm the same way where it's like I don't know nobody,
like especially in college, I'm like, nobody's going to my
fucked up room, like and I'm already like and so
disillusioned by life, like that's the it's like so low
on my list, and yeah, like being married though I'm
also I'm with somebody who is probed for them, I

realized for them. It's like it's about a sense of order, right,
and I'm like system of a down like this order hard.
Like I'm like I don't give a fuck. I'm like
this is not chaos to me. But that's where I
begin to reckon sound like I get that certain things
that I do you don't like, or you do that
you do I don't like. But that's where we meet
and I'm like, fine, I'll make the bed, but the

throw pillows we can't have seventeen thousand fucking but there's
no point. It was a purely decorative. There's decorative they
don't have functionally go on the fucking ground all the time.

Speaker 1 (25:40):
And you're saying we can't even throw them, you know
what I mean?

Speaker 2 (25:43):
The fuck is the point. The fuck is the point.

Speaker 1 (25:45):
So I'm with you, guys. I'm also very impressed they
regularly sleep in beds. I'm a bit feral in that respect.

Speaker 2 (25:52):
Uh like a fucking hit man, like in a fucking
bark a lounger with sunglasses on it. More like.

Speaker 1 (25:59):
I was more like, I'm so this may be a
childish thing. I'm so opposed to sleep that sometimes I'm
just like, go to bed, I end up where I
end up, you know what, the couch, who knows. And
then I'll come to and my girlfriend is like, wonderful woman.
Terrible tasting dudes obviously, but she's she's like, I'll come

to and she's rapping me by my arm pits. It's
I'm like, She's like, maybe I can carry them to
the bedroom.

Speaker 2 (26:29):
I'm like, god, I Bernie lomax on him like that.

Speaker 1 (26:33):
I was like, you don't have the upper arm strength
for this, you don't have the.

Speaker 2 (26:37):
Don't and don't bother I'm a lost cause, like you
can't like and this is so such a valiant effort
on your part, But I am a waist.

Speaker 3 (26:45):
Kind very fine to be like. I will delicately just
kind of like slap you the chest and be like
the fuck out of here.

Speaker 2 (26:53):

Speaker 1 (26:53):
And I'm not intoxicated or on any kind of drugs.
It's just the sleep got me. Uh. And I got
to tell you now that, Joe, now you're saying this,
I realized that I've just always assumed whenever I'm at
anybody's house and I see the bed is made, I've
always assumed they faked it or they did it special

for that day.

Speaker 2 (27:15):
Wow, real drug addict thinking here, it's like you don't
have your shit together this much piece of ship. You're
just like me. Yeah, just like me another stairs. Yeah,
I mean, look, that's what I'm saying. Like I get,
it's a personal thing, like I people who want it made.
I get it, Like I get I get if you're
a person who needs things to be a certain way

of force. That makes sense. I am personally just someone
who was I was born in the darkness, you know
what I mean. You merely play around in it, you know. Yeah,
Also it does also Pittsburgh reference there too. Yeah, when
Bane came out, that's right. Wow. Yeah, although that wasn't
Pittsburgh was It wasn't explicitly Pittsbur.

Speaker 3 (27:56):
I mean it was if you know, you know, I
mean already of the Pittsburgh Steelers were Yeah, yeah, when
the when the stadium collapsed.

Speaker 2 (28:04):
But nothing but timely references on this show. Remember Baine. Anyway,
I don't make my bed and I stick. All right,
let's take a quick break. We'll come back and we're
gonna talk about this news. And we're back, so let's

just check in with the House of Representatives. I mean,
we we used to do that more, but because it's
just a fucking inert clown show, there's not much to
talk about unless you just want to be frustrated even
more with the state of our government. But for the
last month or so, Marjorie Taylor Green, you know, major
league tainted gang Green is out here, has been freaking
out about Speaker of the House Mike Johnson ever since

he went against her dear Putin and helped secure funding
for Ukraine. That was like the thing, like they were
trying so hard to prevent like this Ukraine funding and
then it happened. She's like out, it's over this guy.
This guy's done. We got to get him out of here.
And this has been a theme like with the last
like five GOP speakers. They've had to constantly manage like
the wacky bullshit demands or not really managing them, just

caving to the wacky bullshit demands that come from the
far extreme right. And I mean, I have no sympathy
for them, but this is the fucking bed that they've made.
So oh yeah, look it's all coming. We got Pittsburgh,
we got bed making, we got tarades. Look, it's all
out there for everybody. Those are the themes that are ongoing.
You get bonus points.

Speaker 3 (29:37):
And my girlfriend is Marjorie Taylor Green, so oh you
might see me on the news.

Speaker 2 (29:44):
Well yeah, being like I gotta tell you, I'm here
in New York and there's not like homeless people. Did
you see that clip where her boyfriend, that guy I
call him ass Size, His names like Brian, I don't
know what the fuck his name is, but he's like
on one of those hyper conservative news channels. He was
like in New York covering the Trump trial and he's like,
okay for Philadelphia. I gotta tell you, to be honest,
I'm looking around here in New York City. I thought

there'd be more like homeless people, like violent people, but
it's there's really not. It's not like that he was
having like a fucking crisis that things weren't like aligning.

Speaker 1 (30:12):
With his that that's the same thing those type of
dudes will say when they come to Atlanta. Oh you
know what I mean, Like I got I got out
of the you know, I got out of the airport. Yeah, no,
one tried to rob me once. And I'm like, are
you disappointed? Yeah, what are going on?

Speaker 2 (30:32):
Yeah? You wanted the adrenaline rush of being in a
flight or fight response to.

Speaker 1 (30:37):
They wanted the story for Facebook. They're probably all Facebook people.

Speaker 2 (30:42):
I mean, we still have the fucking like the politicians
are still insistent that we need more police dollars, even
though the FBI is like, yeah, crime is going down,
it's going I mean it's going down in the city there.
So anyway, your girlfriend has been really upset, Shoe, not

just with the lack of bed making, but just the
fact that this the fucking government is functioning, because that's
the thing. The sad thing is when we have these
ship bags, like, sorry, you're sorry to bring up your
girlfriend Marjorie at this point. If you mention her again,
don't feel like you need to preface it.

Speaker 1 (31:20):
Okay, all right, I'm sure though, I'm sure that you
have a beautiful relationship based on unrelated things.

Speaker 3 (31:26):
And that is incorrect.

Speaker 2 (31:27):
But okay, both being maga freaks, man.

Speaker 1 (31:31):
You're just you're at this point, you're staying together for
the starter for the sourdough starter.

Speaker 3 (31:36):
Yeah, for Marjorie's uh yeah patented starter, yeah Green sour Dough.

Speaker 2 (31:41):
But it's like, yeah, people like her and Matt Gates,
like when they're in the mix, it means things like
government shut downs and legislative grid luck are like the
norm and basically every day people suffer when like the
government can't even perform its basic functions. So Marjorie Taylor
Green thought she would have all these supporters to be like,
I think it's time to fucking oust this guy, Mike Johnson.
But she was sorely mistaken. There was like like Thomas

Massey was like the only other idiot to be like, yeah,
I think, yeah, yeah, I think this could be a movement.
But the thing is there are such slim margins for
Republicans in the House that like the Dems have basically
been like, huh, I think we can maybe wrangle this
fucker in Mike Johnson by saying we will protect him
from any attempt to oust him and like we'll give

him the votes to basically neutralize the threat of the
far right. So it's like kind of I don't know
if it's like win win, but basically for the Dems,
they're like, well, we can neutralize the far right and
also get a guy in that still does the bidding
of the military industrial complex. They get too Yeah, I

mean like you look at him, like Mike Johnson is
not someone that you're like, yeah, the guy has a
fucking spine. He's like a biggest the biggest cheerleader of
like the fucking big lie in January sixth, raw raw bullshit.
But from the calculus of the Democrats, based on what
they tell report, it's just like, yeah, the thing is
like we just think Marjorie Taylor Green is like fucking worse.
So that's kind of where we're at. And at least

this guy came around to again throw dollars at arms
manufacturers and that's the that's what the government's what this
is really about.

Speaker 3 (33:14):
That's why we do it. That's why we do It's.

Speaker 1 (33:16):
Why we're out here, Yeah, making our beds.

Speaker 2 (33:19):
I get I get up every morning, I open my
Bible that was it's actually branded by North of Grumman
and Raytheon and read from it, and I realized, I
got work to do. I got to make sure that
the money flows in that direction, because these drones aren't
going to build themselves hooks. They're not. They're not.

Speaker 1 (33:36):
There's a there's a new drone that just dropped. It's
kind of based on a Manta ray design. It's for
maritime usage.

Speaker 2 (33:44):
Really like under like an under like an a taxi drone.

Speaker 1 (33:49):
Yes, yeah, Like what what do you It's the question
I think all three of us have been asking for
a while, like what do you get the bond villain
who has everything? I'm a Manta drone, yes, yep.

Speaker 2 (34:01):
Next one shark drone. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (34:02):
I want to see more seacreature drones.

Speaker 2 (34:04):
Little shrimps yeah yeah, yeah, they're so tiny, like they're undetectable.
It's like, yeah, because little seahorses man, little pistol shrimps man,
pistol shrimps that actually shoot like rather than like that boom. Yeah,
fucking forty fives man fucking outfit them now north of Grummen.

Speaker 1 (34:24):
Now see now we're now we'd crowd sourcing for them. Yeah,
we're we're accidentally now we're in what is that rand?

Speaker 2 (34:34):
Exactly? The old Research and Development Corporation. Nothing weird, but whatever, Look,
colorad Us, we got we have ideas that are fun,
you know, and we're out in the box.

Speaker 3 (34:45):
You know.

Speaker 2 (34:45):
But doorry, there's still lethal. They're still fucking lethal. Yeah,
they're still fucking lethal.

Speaker 1 (34:50):
Also, I will say Johnson, Mike Johnson does sound I've
never met the guy, don't plan too, but does sound
very a I chat gpt his like his speeches. Yeah,
so I think he's just like he's a placeholder, right,
he's just there to play the game.

Speaker 2 (35:09):
Yeah he's Oh absolutely, I mean, like just he's just
he's a full on conservative creature who is just like
I just want to stay in office. But it was
it was interesting to see because there was so much
pressure from the like the far right to be like
don't give you grain money or like you know, trying
to paint it in like this America. First thing is
really just to be like, don't like help Russia maybe

or whatever. I don't know, do whatever you want. But
like the fact that he did that, I think is
what dems are like, Oh shit, interesting, he he still
knew that we still had to keep the dollars flowing
to the arms manufacturers.

Speaker 3 (35:40):
Okay, maybe we could work with this guy out of curiosity.
Have you guys ever met a Mike Johnson? I have, yeah, several,
because oh yeah, it's like one of the most common names, right,
common names, I would assume, Yeah, especially I think for
our general age bracket, Like.

Speaker 2 (35:57):
Yeah, I actually did the The or reason I remember
it is like I think I did a meet and
greet with the Olympic four hundred meter champion Michael twice.

Speaker 3 (36:07):
Right, that had been the most famous Michael Johnes.

Speaker 2 (36:10):
Yeah, exactly, sprinter Michael Jackson. Michael Johnson is so pissed
now about this Mike Johnson. I knew it.

Speaker 3 (36:16):
Kevin McCarthy too, Oh shit, So let's keep a streak going. Yeah,
and I just hung out with John Bayner, former Speaker
of the House.

Speaker 2 (36:23):
John Bayner. He's into weed now, dude, He's kind of chill.
He's kind of chill. He's trying to figure out how
to get more weed into Ohio. All right, let's move
on to the New York Police Department. So they raided
Columbia University Tuesday night, which was even more brutal and
even more brutal raid than the one before, where even
the NYPD was like you want these kids are all

like sitting down in like tense, like what do you
want us to do? Like beat the shit out of
them for like what? Okay? And now they will reportedly
be staying on campus until at least May seventeenth, because yeah,
why not pay sixty grand a year to live in
a fully literarized police state slash campus. But the thing
that's happening right now is like this clear out that happened.

There are students that barricaded themselves in Hamilton Hall. If
you recall the two episodes ago, we spoke with our
former producer Tricia, who is actually a student at Columbia
and was telling us like what's happening there, And it's
a lot different than the news would have you think,
where they're like it's just crazy shit all the time.
It's like they're students that are peacefully protesting. You guys
are covering what's happening on the outside of the campus,

which are not the student protests. Those are just other
fucking randos that are doing their thing. But the now,
the big reason why Eric Adams has being like the
New York PD is justified is because the protest was
not actually composed of Columbia students, even though they were
not letting people on campus that without a Columbia ID.

These are rather quote, and we love this fucking explanation
all the time with protests outside agitators and that conspiracy
theory has been fucking flying around and all in the
media sphere for a while now. But like he's using
this as a rationalization. During a press conference, he said, quote,
these are professionals that were here, and I just want

to send a clear message out that there are people
who are harmful and who are trying to radicalize our
children and we cannot ignore this. So he brought the
kids into it.

Speaker 1 (38:19):
Oh, which is nice side agitators, Yeah, you love to
see it.

Speaker 2 (38:24):
It's always easy to say that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's
like it. Whether it's the easiest thing to discredit anything,
it's that sound edit like that that wasn't the real thing.

Speaker 1 (38:31):
Or they're so bad because of it. Yeah, I say
we lean into it. You guys, the next time you're
just having a small disagreement with your friends or you're
like in a restaurant, just go fight, go hog wild
and then say that outside agitators.

Speaker 2 (38:46):
Why or like if someone has an opinion like on
a like a disagreement you're having, like another person, like,
hold on, we don't need outside agitators right now. Man,
excuse me, this guy is an agent provocateur or hindes.
What do you see?

Speaker 1 (38:59):
I am not having it? Yeah, what do you fucking spook?

Speaker 2 (39:01):
Dude? What the fuck? Where are you at?

Speaker 3 (39:04):
If you test positive for COVID, you can just be like, no, no, no,
it's just outside agitators. Yeah, in my system right now.
So you actually, I wouldn't worry about it, and you
should let me come.

Speaker 1 (39:13):
That's really I'm kind of a hero, so I should
get to board the plate.

Speaker 2 (39:17):
Aaron Rodgers will be saying this. Probably soon someone is
gonna like, I'm not it's an outside agitation. That's probably
what's uh what's showing up on that test? But yeah,
so the NYPD's Deputy Commissioner Terry Sheppard made a promotional
stop on MSNBC's Morning Joe to show off the fucking
evidence that basically said, this is proof that there's outside agitators.

Did you arrest someone and they were forty five years old,
had nothing to do with the school and were a
criminal and like they were the ones like fucking orchesdra
and everything. No, he held up a fucking kryptonite bike
lock and was like, here it is, folks, the smoking
lock that proves that it's outside agitators. It's like, come on,
y'all had the NYPD. I thought y'all were good at

like planting shit like on people like, yeah.

Speaker 3 (40:06):
This is real, this.

Speaker 1 (40:07):
Is Slopoh okay, where are tax dollars going?

Speaker 2 (40:10):
I know? Yeah, like you guys aren't. You guys are
even slipping at your basic function, which is to like
just completely terrorize people and and obscure the actions of
innocent people to make them seem like bad people. So
he showed off it's like this heavy chain with the bikelock,
and if you've seen a fucking like full on kryptonite
bikelock underneath like that black like nylon wrapping, it's a

fucking industrial chain. That's why they're like, nobody's fucking cutting
through this without making a scene. And this is what
the Deputy Commissier said, quote, this is not what students
bring to school, Okay, this is what professionals bring to
campuses and universities. And you're like, a, well, what do
you mean this picture of the lock. It's like he
keeps like bringing it up during the discussion, and I mean, like,

look at this there. It's just like this, this fucking luck.
And sure, let's put aside the fact at fucking anyone
in New York City with money can buy a fucking
chain at a fucking hardware store. This fucking specific chain itself,
this which is just a fucking bikelock. It's the chain
that goes on a bike lock. It's a bikelock that
was literally promoted by Columbia University's Public safety department to

their students' like you go, hey, man, you need these
locks to keep your fucking bike safe on campus. This
literal kryptonite lock that the fucking cops like. And here
it is man outside agitators and by outside I mean
students at this universe.

Speaker 3 (41:35):
As inside as you can get.

Speaker 1 (41:37):
Yeah, you know what I mean, they're sleeper agents.

Speaker 2 (41:41):
Who it's it's also it's on the fucking website still,
like it's not even like wild. This isn't even some
like way back machine shit, Like if you just go
to Columbia University, they're like, hey, discount like bike locker
and laptop lock program, get it at a deal. So yeah,
those might be there since the fucking university's selling them.

Speaker 3 (42:03):
But I'm sure I'm sure Morning Joe caught onto it immediately.

Speaker 2 (42:07):
The journals of course, gotcha.

Speaker 1 (42:11):
Yeah, journalists.

Speaker 2 (42:12):
Instead you had Mika being like, oh my gosh, it
was so harrowing what these she said. Mika Razinski, the
co host, was like, I just want to, you know,
thank the officers for containing the situation. And then she
fucking previously she compared images from these campus protests to
the January sixth riot.

Speaker 3 (42:31):
People are doing that. They notice that online. A lot
of the right wing people are like, oh, so you
you hate January sixth, and yet look at what they're
doing at Columbia and this is kay, this is okay
to you.

Speaker 2 (42:43):
The same thing they had with like the Black Lives
Matter protests in twenty twenty. Also, it's always just like, oh,
but you're okay with this kind it's like these people
are walking around and then the cops just started busting
fucking heads in, and then the Capitol they're like taking
they're flicking it up, taking selfies with rioters. Very different vibes, oh,
very different vibes. And yeah, it's also funny too because
NBC themselves they've even promoted this fucking bike clock. If

you go on NBC News, they have a thing it's
like our favorite bike locks that'll keep your bike safe.
And that fucking kryptonite lock is on there too. So
it's just a bunch of disingenuous bullshit all around. And yeah,
there was a guy like so a journalist pressed the
deputy commissioner to be like, hey, man, like here's saying,
hey here, here's like this law. It's actually a bike

lock that the students have, and he could not process it,
so he just like kind of like ignored her while
she was bringing this up. This is an interaction between
Katie Honan as a journalist and the deputy police commissioner
who is basically keep has the fucking chain in hand
still to be like no, no, this is a fucking
chain like this, this is a chain that he's completely

ignoring the fact that she's like, this is available to students.

Speaker 1 (43:53):
Change is this the same thing?

Speaker 2 (43:58):
Why would why would this thing? Why was this brought here?
Because these are the locks that we cut off for
the doors.

Speaker 3 (44:05):
In Hamlet where any outside agitators arrested at Columbia's Hamilton Hall.

Speaker 2 (44:09):
I think, I think wanted to address that all no, no,
they didn't, Yeah, no they didn't, and that, and then
he came back and said, he's like, well, there were,
but we can't really give you information yet because we
have to talk to Columbia. But just so you know,
I'm not I can't even actually give you the criteria
for what an outside agitator is. But from my perspective,

I believe the outside agitator someone who goes from the
outside to the inside. So they were outside the building,
and then they went inside the building and barricaded themselves,
so they might be outside like I don't know, they
there's no there's no fucking detail here, so it's all
fucking whatever. Just what I was actually got a joke
about that. Now I'm kind of uncomfortable. I'm sorry. Sorry, man.

My drive, my dead pan delivery is so fucking on
point and It's also we live in a health scape
where that kind of bullshit is believable, unfortunately.

Speaker 3 (45:00):
I mean, yeah, speaking of bedpan, this this reminded me
of like spinal tap, Like this one goes through eleven,
like the very same vibes of like this is a change, Yeah,
this is a chain. You can buy this, yeah, industrial
this is industrial change.

Speaker 2 (45:15):

Speaker 3 (45:15):
But isn't this the same one? Couldn't.

Speaker 2 (45:20):
Couldn't someone else's buy that at the campus?

Speaker 1 (45:22):
But I believe they covered that already.

Speaker 3 (45:24):
This one's a chance. But but it goes up.

Speaker 2 (45:27):
Couldn't someone just add another notch and say theirs goes
up to them? Get him out of here, Get him
out of here, Get him out of here. Outside agitator,
outside agitator, Get them out. They're asking questions, they're they're
bringing up truths in front of us, while we're trying
to discredit a mass student movement that's a peaceful one. Anyway,
gotta go, all right, let's take a quick break, we'll

come back. We'll talk about another charade if you will,
carbon capture, and we're back. So it's the year of
our Lord Joe Biden twenty twenty four, and we have

artificial intelligence that can make tupac. You know, we enter
a rap beef with Kendrick Lamar. You can go to
space if you're not an astronaut. Drones or delivering pizzas
or deadly munitions up to you. But the best way
of letting everybody in your neighborhood know that you're ordering pizza,
obviously is using drones. But we have all these advancements,

but we're still burning coal for fucking power, like it's
the goddamn turn of the century. And you know, there
was an interval. There was environmental news this week where
the G seven announced a collective plan to quote phase
out coal fired power plants by the mid twenty thirties,
and people are like, oh, okay, can we do that sooner?

And while you know, coal isn't that popular anymore, but
it's still widely used. It's and it's not the only
contributor to our fucking carbon emissions. Is the absolute like
most fucked up. It puts out the most carbon dix
at per unit of energy. It's like the word yeah,
it's it's thank you, dirty, dirty coal. But then it
comes this announcement is just like, oh great, what's the deal?

So like they're going to be gone by the mid
twenty thirties. We're ending the use of what we call
unabated coal, which means what you can keep your plants
burning coal as long as quote carbon pollution is captured
before entering the atmosphere. Hell yeah, I love a grift.

Speaker 1 (47:33):
Let's get it.

Speaker 2 (47:33):
Let's get it, a drift capture? What does that even mean?
Exactly right, because there's there's similar regulations in the like
the latest that came out of the EPA that Joe
Biden is, you know, obviously Joe Biden's EPA, but these
were announced last week and would force plants to capture
ninety percent of their carbon emissions if they want to
quote stay open beyond twenty thirty nine. What what that

Biden will be ninety seven years old and potentially a
T one thousand at that point. And again when John
Kerry in twenty twenty one was like, no, man, we're
gonna be We're gonna be off coal by twenty thirty
and now we're like, if you want to keep your
coal past twenty thirty nine, put like a condom on
the smoke stack and everything will be okay. But again,

this plant is basically suggesting that coal plants can keep
going as long as they use carbon capture. And it's
just like there's no one thing that's carbon capture. It's
like an umbrella term, you know what I mean. It's
like a it's a collection of technologies that can take
out CO two from the atmosphere and store it. But again,
like you're saying, there's a number of issues with capturing

it and how it works. Like there's one currently right,
CO two is being transported via pipelines, which are very dangerous.
In twenty twenty at COE two pipeline ruptured in Mississippi
and at least forty five people ended up in a hospital. Okay,
that doesn't sound like maybe we get that one off
the table.

Speaker 3 (48:50):
But pipelines are usually so good. Yeah, yeah, usually you're
so popular. Yeah, exactly like the other. The other thing too,
is they're saying like, oh, maybe we should clear cup
parts of our national forest. That's another thing that's been
fucking proposed to be, Like, well, we could just do
it through the forest. It's like, but we would need
to clear a lot of trees to be it's using it.

Speaker 2 (49:10):
Yeah, right, yeah, a little bit dude. Birds can find
another tree trees at home exactly.

Speaker 1 (49:18):
Well, fixed that we'll fix by going to private industry
with bird condos, right.

Speaker 2 (49:24):
Yeah, oh my god. Yeah, black gets into it. They're like, yeah, man,
kind of bird nests. People are buying up fucking distressed
bird nests and ship.

Speaker 1 (49:34):
I don't understand. Okay, So where maybe I'm missing something here?
I get that it's the the bad junk is going
through the pipeline, but what is the destination point?

Speaker 2 (49:47):
Where is it?

Speaker 3 (49:49):
You know, it's it's just leaves, it leaps, it goes away.

Speaker 2 (49:53):
What's the prime righting outside agitator? Man?

Speaker 1 (49:56):
Right, I'm being a dick, no further questions.

Speaker 2 (49:59):
And also we don't ask why there's literally no federal
oversight body for carbon dioxide pipeline projects. That's the other
struck red. Yeah, there's no federal overside for this shit.
So basically you're being like, yeah, man, we trust you
to fuck the earth even further, and like, yeah, to
your point, like what do you do with it? Right?
Some things are being stored, right, then there are other
ones are like, well, we can actually use it for

other stuff, Like for example, the carbon dioxide used to
be like carbonate of beverage, well, that goes back into
the atmosphere the second you open that fucking can, so
you're not quite doing away with that carbon dioxide, even
if you gave it another use or like dry ice.
As the dry ice melts, it just returns into the
air in the form of carbon dioxide. But and then

they also like, well, we can use it to extract
like well, like oil from older oil wells. But people
are like, what the fuck are you talking? Like, we're
gonna let them fuck the earth, and then the emissions
that they use can be used to procure even more
fucking fox so fuel, Like, none of it fucking makes sense,
and they're trying right now. Oil companies are trying to
spin this whole thing. Is like, it's sort of like

what we call net zero oil. Oh great, yeah, exactly,
it's net zero. The only net zero I respect came
in a free CD boot disc to get fucking Internet,
you know what I mean? Not this bullshit anyway, that's
a washing millennial reference for people. So the other thing
is like they say, well it could be recycled into fuel,
it's too expensive and it's not efficient, So then that

basically leaves us with burying it underground. And that's where
the forests come in. They're like, okay, man, we use
the pipelines to fucking hill, Like take the fucking car
CO two and put it under the fucking forest, which
is just adding insult the injury.

Speaker 3 (51:42):
So we're going to carbonate, carbonate the forest.

Speaker 1 (51:44):
I like his spicy forest. Let's try it.

Speaker 2 (51:46):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, a carbonata if you will. And then
there's like the question of how like effective carbon capture
really is, because that's the thing that is always the
second that these like energy companies and coal mining company
and fossil fuel producing companies have said. They're like, well,
there's carbon sequestration. That's why you don't we can keep
business as usual because we will capture it and then

we will fucking do something with it that eventually lets
it go back into the atmosphere. Like a recent study
that found that in industrial plants, like one of these
industrial plants that was like we have a great carbon
capture system, it was only able to reduce the plant's
emissions by ten to eleven percent, so not quite the
eighty to ninety percent. And yeah, like the administration is

currently fundeling billions of dollars into the technology and it's
which is fucking wild because even though it's like some
of these like sequestration programs are being operated by the
fossil fuel companies. So there's a government funded project in
Texas that is being run by a subsidiary of Occidental Petroleum,

which is like you get stabbed by a mugger and
then the mugger puts on like a fake mustache in
doctor's coat and he's like, hey man, you want to
pay seventy bucks for a bandaid? And you're like, aren't
you the fucking guy? Just what the fuck is this?

Speaker 1 (53:04):
Well, you see, it's oversimplified to say that knives and
muggings are the problem.

Speaker 2 (53:09):
Oh okay, yeah, we need bigger band aids big and
the knives aren't as dangerous. It really into something we
call blood capture.

Speaker 1 (53:20):
We're also definitely not vampires.

Speaker 2 (53:23):
Yeah, it's just a very very wild thing because you know,
a lot of especially climate scientists, are like, it doesn't
doesn't make sense if you're still burning it just to
capture it, and the technology isn't good enough, like you're
you're functionally doing like fuck all. Like it's not a
get out of jail free card because it still has

impacts on the climate, So just keep an eye out
when people are trying to tell you that this may
be the answer when really, like, obviously the big thing,
especially in America is we just don't have a modernized
electrical grid. So there are a lot of opportunities for
like massive solar projects like in the Southwest that could
fucking easily handle the energy needs of like a whole region,

but because we don't have an efficient way to transport
the energy, like through a grid, a transmission grid. It's
just like that's the argument that people use, like to
fucking be like, ah, well, I don't know if we
can do that.

Speaker 1 (54:17):
It's like yeah, but then take the amount of investment,
the sweet sweet investment dollars they're going to be put
into projects like this, which clearly, I would argue, hopefully
not sounding too cynical, I would argue, the end motivation
here is it so much taking care of the CEO
two as it is like continuing to pursue old profit

models while at the same time being able to get
behind a podium and say like we're very excited about
capturing all this carbon, you know.

Speaker 2 (54:45):
Of course, and then like people feel like, well they're
doing it sounds like they're doing something.

Speaker 3 (54:49):
No, they're capturing it. Yeah, they're capturing. Oh is the
carbon bad? They capture it. It's gonna be interesting because
I know that this is going to come up during
the debates. It sounds like the type of frame is
that you can hear saying, we're so used to be
sequestration and clean the things that clean coal. Yeah, because
that used to come up a lot. This feels like
the new clean coal. Yeah, absolutely, carbon carbon capture. Yeah,

things like we capture the carbon. Then no one will
ask him a follow up and they'll just be like.

Speaker 2 (55:20):
All right, yeah, we'll put the CO two in jail.

Speaker 1 (55:23):
You guys know about that, right, you guys saw Columbia, right,
imagine that with carbon.

Speaker 2 (55:29):
Yeah right, agitators exactly exactly. But yeah, it's this is
this will keep going round and round and who knows,
Like I mean, at that point, if if Biden and
Trump ever debate, they might both be like, yeah, yeah, yeah,
carbon capture. We both agree on that, and it shows
you that the lobbyists did their job properly. Anyway. Joe Kuzala,
thank you so much for joining us today on the

Daily Zeitgeist. Man, where can people find you and follow
you and honor your contributions to the internet in comedy.

Speaker 3 (55:58):
Please please honor me. You can go to Instagram and
TikTok at Joe Qua Jekwa or jok jok on Twitter.
Jokeozol dot com has those tour dates that Miles mentioned
up top. I'll be in New York City, Saratoga, go
to Memphis, Panama City, all sorts of different places very soon.
And yeah, I have a If you go to my
YouTube you can see all my stuff. You can find

my have a half hour special in Company Central, half
hour special in Helium. I've got a million sketches I've dropped,
so have fun. Listen to my album funny songs and sketches.
I have so much content for you people, just trying
to help you put off thinking about your mortality.

Speaker 2 (56:36):
Yeah for just a moment, and they're fun. I mean, yeah,
thank you. The best way to do it. It doesn't
involve ingesting poisons at all, exactly.

Speaker 3 (56:46):
That's one of my one of the main tenants of
my philosophy of.

Speaker 2 (56:50):
Like, don't ingest poisons.

Speaker 1 (56:52):
Free cup of orange juice with them.

Speaker 3 (56:54):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, there you go.

Speaker 2 (56:55):
Orange juice is a health food, especially if it's made
by minute made and has a bunch of other added
to it. Ben, mister Bowlin, Oh shit, I forgot you
asked you, Joe, Is there a work of media, social
or otherwise that you've been enjoying you want to share?

Speaker 3 (57:08):
Yes, I mean I would imagine this maybe has come
up on the show before, but I really cannot stop
looking and talking about the Drew Carrey tweets about the
sphere or he went to see Fish. You know, Okay,
I'm going.

Speaker 1 (57:25):
To know what the spear is. I'm aware of Drew
Carrey and Drew Carey.

Speaker 3 (57:29):
Drew Carrey went to see Fish at the Sphere, and
I am going to read to you guys his series.
Just two tweets hashtag fish at the hashtag Sphere. I
swear I just talked to God. I would give you
all my money, stick my dick in a blender, and
swear off pussy for the rest of my life in
exchange for this, bro. I met God tonight, for real.

I feel like I just got saved by Jesus. No lie.
And then someone replied to that and they were like, yeah, Fish,
it's cool. And then he went this is where it
takes it to the to the moon. This is what
it must feel like to come with a pussy, because
if it's even close, I'm flying to wherever tomorrow and
getting the best pussy money can buy. I don't need
to be a man no more. If it means I

can feel like this all the time, fun, keep it bro.
If I can get this feeling instead, that was God
at work or something like it felt like I was
being saved by Jesus. No, lie, oh my oh god, Okay.
I think Drew's as good as anyone has.

Speaker 2 (58:29):
Yeah, but like in his own way where you're like, yeah,
it's like so, I'm like, I don't know if that's
a great endorsement or the most terrifying one I've ever heard.

Speaker 3 (58:39):
Holy shit, certainly intense.

Speaker 2 (58:43):
Yeah, and I love it.

Speaker 3 (58:45):
I just think also because you just think about who
Drew Carry is and how we first met Drew Carry
and how we still kind of know him as the
host of Price is Right, and like, you know, I'm
one of the big hosts for America, and that he's
going through the sphere and being like I need a
pussy because I need to get fucked like this uh
free thing. It's because of Fish at the sphere. I know, like,

was he he must have been fucked off his face? Man,
Like this feels like an acid uh oh yeah, you're
way ext to see. Maybe like maybe a whole cocktail
of hallucinogenics.

Speaker 2 (59:17):
But yeah, probably like some hippie flipping probably you know,
mixing you got it's probably M D M A with
some kind of uh psychedelic for sure. Could you imagine
if he's like a stone cold sober bro.

Speaker 1 (59:30):
I was thinking maybe he just really likes jam bands.

Speaker 2 (59:34):
I mean, I get people, I get that world, because
those people definitely do talk like that.

Speaker 3 (59:38):
But right I think you're if you do a drug
test at a fish show, it's gonna be hard to
find anybody. I think he was even a little bit sober.

Speaker 2 (59:45):
Yeah, yeah, just even from a contact you know, you're
getting contact acid highs.

Speaker 3 (59:51):
Like acid fumes or somehow. But I really like appreciate
the you just it feels like for a major media
you're like Drew Carrey, you don't see unfiltered, like non
pr combed over statements like this, Like you know, Drew
wrote this like this is that dude just not worrying

about the fact that he hosts prices right, that he
has all these you know, jobs, that he might be afraid.
He's just like, no, man, this is what I'm feeling,
and I'm gonna say it. It's the tweets are still up.
It wasn't like I'm not sure someone told him someone
on his team told him to take him down, and
he was like, no, who cares.

Speaker 2 (01:00:29):
He doubled down too when asked about it.

Speaker 1 (01:00:32):
Yeah, honestly, this is great for Prices, right, because I
can't remember the last time I thought about it as
a show, you know, so now, hell could you?

Speaker 2 (01:00:42):
He starts saying that shit on Prices right, He's like, folks,
I really got to tell you, man, I finally know
what it's like to come with a vagina. Okay. And
I said that because I know I'm on CBS. I'm
not going to say the word I wanted to. Okay.
I had a full on vaginal orgasm watching fish at
this sphere and I don't fucking need any anything else anymore.
Why don't you fucking have this mic I actould be
at the sphere?

Speaker 1 (01:01:03):
Yeah, the speed away, let's read the contestants.

Speaker 2 (01:01:05):
Yeah, let's meet our contests. So we got to go
then from Yeah, Youngstown, Ohio. Come on down, Claire, all right,
and I'm just sitting this fucking see skid fucking costs.
She's like twenty eight. Yeah, more on that later, Claire.
I'm still kind of fucked from seeing Fish at the sphere? Man.
Oh yeah, Man? Have you been to the round? Claire? Yeah?

I don't know the fucking sphere? Claire just like getting
all fucking agro about it. You have a pussy whoa, whoa,
whoa whoa. I'm sorry you have a budget? No, drue
what No, I'm sorry? The networks the problem.

Speaker 3 (01:01:41):

Speaker 2 (01:01:42):
It would be.

Speaker 1 (01:01:43):
Beat number one most popular episode of Prices.

Speaker 2 (01:01:46):
Right, I yeah, sure? You Drew like still fucking trying
to shake off the acid trip from the Spearfish Show
while trying to seriously host Prices, right, because who was
the dude? Oh that was a That was Josh Androwsky, Right,
who did it?

Speaker 3 (01:01:59):
He was on I was on mushrooms or acid while
he was on a contestant on Prices.

Speaker 2 (01:02:03):
Yeah, skateboarding rabbi, skateboard rabbi. Yeah, yeah, that bit's been done.
I guess Ben. What about you? Where do people find you?
Follow you? Hear you? And what's a work of social
media or other kind of media I've been fucking with
right on, right on.

Speaker 1 (01:02:17):
Yeah. You can find me calling myself in a burst
of creativity at Ben Bullen on Instagram or EXFK, Twitter,
et cetera. You can also check out our shows stuff
they don't want you to know and ridiculous history. You
can find me hanging out with Miles and Jack on
on different shows including Daily zeitguys, a piece of media

I've been enjoying. And this is not this is not
blowing smoke. It's weird because before we were going to
hang out with Joe today, I looked at that Oppenheimer's
sketch and I have friends in Pittsburgh, so I sent
it to them. And Joe, you and I haven't met, right,
So you're.

Speaker 2 (01:03:00):
Saying, right like, this is like a scam, like that's
how people like in a snake oil sales or and
we've never met.

Speaker 3 (01:03:05):

Speaker 1 (01:03:06):
I met you the first time doctor that on Miles,
so uhait that was purely coincidental. I enjoyed it. I
actually sent it to some friends who live in Pittsburgh,
and I was because I've got friends in communism and uh,
and I was like, do you guys, Do you guys
think these dudes are really from Pittsburgh.

Speaker 2 (01:03:27):
It's Burburgh not all Sorry, it's.

Speaker 1 (01:03:30):
My Atlantic coming out and uh and uh and they
unanimously you'll be glad to hear it. They said, yes,
we think they are from Pittsburgh.

Speaker 2 (01:03:38):
Who are these arguters of Pittsburgh in pittsburghess.

Speaker 1 (01:03:41):
That You know what, man, I'm not an expert on things,
but I'm good at finding experts.

Speaker 2 (01:03:45):
Yeah, yeah, I just I'm at the point of my life.
Random numbers in Pittsburgh. Hey, hey, hey, you want to
look at a guess for me?

Speaker 3 (01:03:51):
Four one, two and then just there random?

Speaker 2 (01:03:53):
Yeah, four on two six eight life hack.

Speaker 1 (01:03:56):
You know, just whenever you're in those conversations, always append
to the clause from earlier when you introduce yourself, just like, hey,
it's me Ben from earlier. Nine out of ten times
people aren't going to call you on it because they
don't want to feel like they forgot someone.

Speaker 2 (01:04:11):
Right wow, No, no, but thank you for thank you
for being here, Ben. It's always a pleasure. A tweet
I like, they're just the odd look, I'm look, I'm
a rap fan. And right now there's an ongoing beef
between a man from can Did you hear that, Kendrick? Yeah,
the Kendrick Lamar tracks pretty fucking bro. You got problems

with Drake because Kendrick Lamar is a better rapper than you.
Just you have to know that. But this tweet is
from another rapper that I like from Florida, Denzel Curry
at Denzel Curry tweeted Cole definitely knew what was going
to happen. That's a reference to j Cole when he
entered the beef and then pulled his dis track. He's like,
you know this is actually I like Kendrick and this.

I don't even believe what I'm just don't worry about.
I gotta go. I'm twoofy. He called his own track goofy. Yeah.
I mean if people gave him a bunch of shit
because it's like good hip hop. But I'm like whatever,
Like if if you're an artist and you're not, if
you can't stand by your art, I don't think I
don't see a problem with you being like, nah, that
wasn't fucking sincere liket like people fucking wanted like personally, like,

I don't care if Kendrick Lamar is saying that he's
bigger than me or whatever, like whatever. My my ego
is not that fragile, but anyway.

Speaker 1 (01:05:25):
Yeah, it is like releasing a mixtape called No Worries
if not you know what I mean?

Speaker 2 (01:05:29):
Yeah, exactly exactly. You can find me at Miles of
Gray on Twitter and Instagram. You can also find Jack
and I on the basketball podcast Miles and Jack on
man Boosties and I like ninety Fiance. You can catch
me on four to twenty Day Fiance with Sophia Alexandra.
You can find us at Daily Szeitgeist on Twitter. We
don't call that shit x ever, just like Acri, sure

fucking whatever. The fuck stadium it's Heinsfield, just like Field
at Honfield Staples Center. It ain't Crypto dot com arena, Okay,
it ain't ever. We're gonna be Ourener and what is that? Oh?
The Daily hit guys on Instagram. We got a Facebook
fan page on a website, dailiese gus dot com where
posts our episodes in our footnotes, no thank you man,

where you can find all the articles we talked about today,
as well as the song We're going to ride out on.
We're gonna go out on some azzy like psychedelic jazz
fusion music. There's this band called Mildlife that I really
fucking like. They're from Australia because all the good bands
are from Australia. Now it's just like whatever, that's what
the planet has decided. This track is called Yourself and
it's just a fucking They're just their tracks are straight groovers,

like if you like old like you know, like some
Steely Dan kind of shit, but like a little bit
more forward thinking and tripier. This is for you. Okay,
this is Mildlife with yourself. Uh, that is gonna do
it for us today. We'll be back later to tell
you what's trending in the afternoon. And the dailies case
is a production of my Heart Radio. So for more
podcasts on my Heart Radio, visit the hight Radio app,

Apple Podcasts wherever wherever people just give away podcast for free.
Just go there. Okay, we'll talk to you later. Bye.

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