S1: Bonus Ep 3 - Parole

Andrea and Jenifer discuss the emotional impact of Spencer's release from prison. 

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:23):
I'm under a gunning and this is Betrayal Bonus episode three, Parole.
This is a conversation Jen and I recorded on Thursday,
July twenty eight I wanted us get on a call because, like,

(00:44):
as of I think about an hour ago, Spencer was
released from prison. Yeah, it's crazy because there were moments
during all of this where he was going to get parole,
and then a year ago he got his parole revoked
after the victim wrote a letter to the parole board,

(01:07):
and then they granted him parole, and he was supposed
to get out in June, and then they denied him
transitional housing and now all of a sudden, he is out.
And so how much time did he actually do behind bars.
He got charged on six counts of sexual assault of
a student. He was sentenced for each of those counts

(01:31):
to twenty years, but only to serve five of those
years in prison, and he was serving all six counts
at the same time concurrently. And he got out in
four years in one month. It feels like a long

(01:53):
time ago that the police came and arrested him from
our house and now he's walking out of those prison walls.
It's almost like a lifetime ago. I'm a different person now.
I've just gone through a lot, and I think I'm
stronger for it. Oh, there's no question. I mean, we've

(02:15):
talked a lot about the person you were when that
happened in twenty eighteen and the person that you are now,
and you're still gen but there's been so much more
to your foundation and strength that you've accumulated over the
last four years. But when did you find out? So
it's weird. I thought the state was going to give

(02:37):
me seventy two hours notice before he got out. Instead,
Rachel called me last week and said I got a
message that he was getting out. So that's how I
found out. I think she knew how important it was
to me to know as well. So it's one of

(02:58):
those things where whoever had gotten the information first would
have called the other. She and I stay in touch,
We support each other. How was she doing with the news?
Was it tough? Yeah? I think it's tough for her
right now. She's still feeling nervousness, fear, and you know,

(03:18):
just the unknown. You know, when someone who has sexually
assaulted you gets out of prison, I can imagine makes
it feel more real. I saw her for ice cream
a few days later. Oh a way. Yeah, we had
a really nice time. We made each other laugh, we
supported one another. You know, it just helps to know

(03:42):
you're not alone out there. Do you ever mentally dress
rehears running into him and what you would potentially say. Oh, yeah,
it's my Charlotte moment from Sex in the City when
she runs into mister Big. You know you've been playing
that in your head. When I think about seeing him
face to face, that's when I get scared. And I

(04:03):
don't know what I would say anymore. Because I am
different now, or I see it differently. I may be
able to have a conversation with him, but it's going
to come from a different place now. I don't know
what that is yet, but it'll probably happen one day

(04:25):
and I'll figure it out before then. Yeah, you know,
what do you say or what do you ask someone
that has spent almost his entire life lying and manipulating. Yeah, gosh,
whoever picked him up and is allowing him to live

(04:46):
in their home. I pray keeps their eyes open for
the safety of other people physically and mentally and emotionally. Yeah,
they're still going to be people in his life that
love him and care for him. I just hope now

(05:07):
they're equipped with all the information so that they can
hold him accountable for getting help, because this issue that
he has is not something that can just go away
in six months. This is going to take from what
I understand, intensive intensive therapy and work to I don't

(05:34):
know if you ever overcome it, just what do you
call it? Live a normal life. I always go back
to you November of twenty nineteen, and I think about
what that Jen would be like if we hadn't gone
through everything, if you had n't put in the work,
we hadn't gone through this process. That gen may still

(05:56):
be here today, but she is not hope. And I
just know how much people have been impacted. I see
emails and people who are getting out of relationships or
trying to fix their toxic work environment just because they've
heard you and are empowered. You've empowered people, and I'm
just so proud of you. You have no idea. Oh

(06:18):
thank you friend. If you'd like to reach out to
the Betrayal Team, email us at Betrayalpod at gmail dot com.
That's Betrayal Pod at gmail dot com.