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April 19, 2024 4 mins

Daily Dad Jokes (19 Apr 2024)

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Jokes sourced and curated from reddit.com/r/dadjokes. Joke credits: bruggemb, DinglebarryHandpump, AnimatorNr1, Different-Tie-1085, spochreddit, RjOaSyS, dadjokathon, arrenlex, catnamedvirtue, lightcon_consumed, Masselein, TuesdayBlows, , YourFellaThere, Top_Breakfast2992, TommehBoi, tim_breeding, EndersGame_Reviewer, pootytangmobster83, Persons1001, Biriuk1337, xtilexx

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Transcript

Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
I've just seen a man with no armed cycle past me.
I'm not sure of his name, but his face rang
a bill.

Speaker 2 (00:12):
Turns out that Lance Armstrong was not only taking drugs,
he was pedaling two.

Speaker 1 (00:21):
It's my first week working at the bicycle factory and
they've already made me a spokesperson.

Speaker 2 (00:32):
What's the difference between a well dressed man on a
unicycle and a poorly dressed man on a bicycle? A tire.

Speaker 1 (00:43):
Daughter texted me this in the morning. I can't wake
up this morning, feel like a bicycle too tired.

Speaker 2 (00:56):
Where do bicycles go for a drink around here? Handlebars?

Speaker 1 (01:05):
Every day I go for a walk, I get hit
by the same bicycle. It's a vicious cycle.

Speaker 2 (01:14):
Why did ET's bicycle only turn left? Because Americans have
unalienable rights? What was the first Italian bicycle? The Pinna farthing?
Did you hear about the guy who was arrested for

(01:35):
riding a bicycle made of marijuana? He was pedaling dope.

Speaker 1 (01:48):
In order to save money, I decided to stop using
tires on my bicycle. So far, the idea hasn't gained
any traction.

Speaker 2 (02:03):
How many birds can ride a bicycle? Two can?

Speaker 1 (02:11):
We'll return with more laughs following this short break. What
do you call a girl sitting on the handlebars of
a bicycle? Is a bille?

Speaker 2 (02:26):
I wanted tickets to Olympic track cycling event. I asked
everyone I knew for tickets, but all anyone could do
is suggest someone else to ask. In the end, I
was just going round and round.

Speaker 1 (02:40):
I saw plenty of squirrels this morning cycling through the park.
I don't know how they can afford bikes.

Speaker 2 (02:51):
What do you call a bike trail that shows no
empathy a cycle path?

Speaker 1 (03:00):
Shark can swim faster than me, but I can run
faster than a shark. So when a triathlon, it would
all come down to who was the better cyclist.

Speaker 2 (03:12):
How do flowers ride a bike with its petals?

Speaker 1 (03:17):
What do bikes and humans have in common? They're both bipeddle.

Speaker 2 (03:24):
The police came around last night and told me my
dogs were chasing people on bikes. I told them my
dogs don't even have bikes.

Speaker 1 (03:33):
Mary Poppins retired from her nanny job to ride BMX
full time. Now she's known as Wheeley Poppins. I'm Bob
Jeffy and I'm Montgomery Jones, and we're the spokesman for
National Bicycle Day. We're on a mission to spread the
laughs and groans far and wide, so please do us
a favor and share just one of these jokes with

(03:55):
your family and friends today.

Speaker 2 (03:56):
Thanks. Looking for more dad joke humor to share, then
subscribe to our new weekly email newsletter. It's our weekly
roundup of the best dad jokes, memes and humor for
you to enjoy. Spread the laughs and groans and sign
up today. Check the sign up link in the show

(04:18):
notes page or visit dailydadjokespodcast dot com. The Daily Dad
Jokes Podcast is produced by Classic Studios. See the show
notes page for social media links and joke credits. This
show was recorded in front of a canned studio audience.
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