Daily Dad Jokes (18 Apr 2024)
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Jokes sourced and curated from reddit.com/r/dadjokes. Joke credits: houndoom92, Imaginary_Coat441, steikul, SadRefrigerator1, sydh-sun, EndersGame_Reviewer, snekinmaboot1, Garrod_Ran, Maskofcreator, SnowDog80, TheQuietKid22, Muiruri23, , qpid, Joel_Boyens, SamFx23, Brobot6911, EndersGame_Reviewer, RJLightning68, snekinmaboot1, Bossk759
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Episode Transcript
A friend asked me if I had seen the movie Tractor.
I said no, but I've seen the trailer.
Speaker 2 (00:13):
What did Jean Luke Icard leave in the bathroom captain's log?
Speaker 1 (00:21):
I will give you one of the important lessons in
learning how to play guitar, stay tuned.
Speaker 2 (00:33):
My wife told me to stop making jokes about the Beatles.
I was going to argue with her, but then I
decided to let it be.
Speaker 1 (00:50):
What do you call a camel without a hump? Humphrey.
Speaker 2 (01:00):
Don't you just hate it when someone answers their own question?
I do.
Speaker 1 (01:11):
I asked a cannibal why he was eating a human.
He replied, you are what you eat.
Speaker 2 (01:18):
I really love my spine, it's always so supportive.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
I forgot to flush the toilet this morning. My wife
found it and angrily asked me, what is this crap?
Speaker 2 (01:33):
I said, wow, first, yes, I took my friend to
see the World's Biggest Fan for his birthday. He was
blown away.
Speaker 1 (01:49):
My girlfriend keeps accusing me of cheating. She's starting to
sound like my wife. The laughter is an over. We'll
be back after this brief break.
Speaker 2 (02:03):
What do you call a starving hippo in Budapest? A
hungry hungry hippo.
Speaker 1 (02:13):
What plant do Homo sapien seeds grow into human beings?
Speaker 2 (02:22):
What do you call a cow with no legs ground beef?
Speaker 1 (02:30):
I got some orthopedic shoe saws because my back has
been hurting lately and it's been affecting my posture. I
stand corrected.
Speaker 2 (02:43):
The Himalayas aren't the best mountains, but they're definitely up there.
Speaker 1 (02:52):
What does your computer say when it gets hacked? Oh?
Son of a glitch?
Speaker 2 (03:02):
Can someone suggest a place I can get camouflage clothing?
I can't find any.
Speaker 1 (03:11):
Do you hear about the cannibal who consumed most of
a woman while she was holding a candy bar? He
ate everything butterfingers.
Speaker 2 (03:23):
I'm Bob Jeffy.
Speaker 1 (03:24):
And I'm Montgomery Jones. There's a bonus dad joke waiting
for you at the end of the episode. Let's spread
some happiness or pain with these jokes. Wishing you a
great day, and I'll be back with more jokes tomorrow.
Thank you for tuning in.
Speaker 2 (03:46):
Looking for more dad joke humor to share, Then subscribe
to our new weekly email newsletter. It's our weekly roundup
of the best dad jokes, memes and humor for you
to enjoy. Spread the laughs and groans and sign up today.
Check the sign link in the show notes page or
visit Daily dadjokespodcast dot com. The Daily Dad Jokes podcast
(04:07):
is produced by Classic Studios. See the show notes page
for social media links and joke credits. This show was
recorded in front of a canned studio audience. I got
into an accident with a truck carrying canned orange juice.
I should have concentrated more
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