July 11, 2019 • 42 mins
Sometimes sexy rugby players can be big hearted, and sometimes you need to just show some benevolence to your fellow passengers in the skies. From almsgiving in Laos, to feeding stray pups in Cairo, travel writer Daniel Scheffler believes that a little generosity on the road goes much further than you could possibly imagine. #travel
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:02):
Hi. I'm Daniel Scheffler, and this is everywhere I've spent
the majority of my life circling the globe. I have
fed stray dogs in Cairo for a day, been tattooed
in the back of a jewelry store in Istanbul, and
I've joined a chef to seek out new sources of
protein in the Amazon. So I want to tell you
how I travel and how you can travel. I don't
(00:26):
like lists or must us. I don't care about aspirational
luxury nonsense. In fact, while we're at it, let's throw
out that word luxury altogether. You are being conned. It
doesn't matter if you're wealthy or not alone or with
your personal people. You can have an amazing adventure anywhere.
(00:47):
All you need is an open mind. Don't think about
what I'm telling you, just feel it. It's not a
head knowledge, it's all heart knowledge. Come with me and
I'll show you every where. Every week you will hear
(01:09):
me mention my travel commandments. As much as commandments sound
religious in this context, they absolutely are not. However, they
slightly tied to a little bit of ethics and a
little bit of that thing we could call moral imperative.
If you will, So take these with a pinch of
salt and throw them over your suitcase or whatever. What
(01:31):
they really are is just a sort of guideline that
hopefully will enrich your travel life as it has mine.
You'll also notice that my commandments are not in the negative,
but rather in the positive. Thou shalt so go forth
and shalt away and see what happens this week. Perhaps
(01:53):
thou shalt be generous? Why do we talk about generosity?
Isn't being generous something you quietly practice in the world.
But alas humans are more complicated than that, perhaps in
every performance of generosity there's a little selfish and self
(02:15):
serving nodule, and we're just too uneasy to admit it.
Don't see me, but see me as I bestow you
with my humble generosity. In our very humanity, we tend
to be ingredients of both self serving and generous. So
stay with me here. My philosophy is that sometimes talking
(02:39):
about benevolence that happens whilst on the road does absolutely
inspire others to offer up a little extra of whatever
it may be, kindness or dollars. So it's with the
sentiment that I share some of the bigheartedness that I've experienced.
For instance, in Lao, there's a tradition called arms or
(03:04):
alms giving, which involves giving to others as an act
of virtue. It's either material or it's in the sense
of providing capabilities like free education. Law is the unexplored
sister of the tread Cambodia, Vietnam and Lao. She holds
these deep secrets and traditions that whisper only to her visitors.
(03:27):
When you walk the dusty streets of a sweet town
like Lung Probang, which is a UNESCO Heritage Site, you
might hear locals talking quietly about the Lao New Year
dubbed Songkrun. This yearly festival in April marks the start
of the monsoon season, and compared to any of the
neighboring countries, maintains this authentic tradition. Subtle festivities rise there
(03:52):
with the sun, and in Lng Probang, you wake up
early in the morning with the gentle sound of a
gong five am. The sun hasn't risen, and you sort
of scatter out onto the side of the street and
have a seat just on the sidewalk, and they usit
with a little ball filled with rice, and as the
(04:15):
sun starts to come up, this incredible thing happens where
hundreds and hundreds of monks start to walk, all dressed
in saffron robes, all over the town. As these monks
passed me in total silence, I offer each a handful
of rice. With my other hand, I touched my heart.
(04:40):
Each shaved headed monk with swelled robes, carrying their own
golden ball, stops for his libation. And in the eyes
of the monk I see myself. We become these mirrors
of each other, showing each other our humanity, our kindness,
and our generosity. I believe you can only see in
(05:02):
others what you have in yourself. So when you see
hatred or anger, or maybe even joy, it's because you
recognize it within yourself. Here, the monk and I mirror
our most special essence, generosity. I offer simple rice, and
he offers me this wisdom and this moment to see
(05:23):
myself clearly. It's here and now, a country untainted and
filled with nature, where these quiet commemorations aren't offer to you.
Every day, A slow pace of understated life murmurs and
keeps you in the present time, exactly where you belong.
(05:44):
Let's take a break to hear from our sponsors, and
we'll be right back with more travel from everywhere trade
tables up, you're returning to everywhere land m and acts
of generosity aren't always where you expect them. For instance,
(06:06):
in Egypt, the main attraction is probably the Pyramids, but
I was here for the new Cairo Museum's soft opening
hard hat tour. I rocked up at the museum, but
my fancy tour was canceled. I didn't worry too much
because I had seen the Pyramids, and Cairo has over
twenty million people, so surely there was an adventure to
(06:28):
be had. I was strolling around and found the city's
famed citadel that looks across this ancient metropolis, and I
saw the speck of stray puppies. I decided to go
to a vendor. I knew they served chicken, as they
had these badly photoshopped food items on massive posters outside
(06:49):
the door. I peeked my head in English. France says
English would do, and I said to the man who
works there, good sir, if I give you a hundred dollars,
how much food would that be? The gentleman's eyes enlarged,
and he chatted to his kitchen crew and came back
to me a lot, he said, I said great. About
(07:13):
forty five minutes later, I was standing next to this
towering mosque holding boxes and boxes of food. No, I
wasn't then hungry. This was for my pack of stray dogs.
It was hard for me to open all these styre
foam and cardboard boxes fast enough as the puppies descended
on me. A few dozen of them stormed this feast.
(07:35):
And then there was a group of students that were
studying under the trees, and they came to assist. And
the dogs were like playing and mistaking our fingers for
chicken breasts. And suddenly the students and I had this
thing in common. We had broken through awkwardness and cultural difference,
(07:56):
and suddenly I had stopped being the other, and so
had they. We exchanged names, and we played with the puppies,
and eventually we were pup feeders and friends. So all
these beautiful stories came out of this experience. And I
was just feeding these crazy dogs. And I have a
(08:16):
photo of one of the dogs. She had eight puppies.
They had all eaten, and the puppies went out playing,
and she ran up to me, and she stepped with
one paul onto my knee and looked at me in
a moment of absolute gratitude, her eyes letting me in
behind hers, and time stood still, and we stayed in
(08:42):
this trance for a long time, just being to being
fully connected. And she gone off my knee and went
on with her day and took her puppies. And this
is the same look I have with Ella, my dog,
who's in studio with me and having a little snow
as we speak. She looks at me behind my eyes.
(09:06):
She sees what I wish I could see in myself,
and I look at her beyond into being a matter
and atom. When you asked me what's the best thing
I did in Egypt, it was feeding the stray dogs,
not going to the pyramids. So of course all I
(09:29):
wanted was to either take all these dogs home with
me or come and feed them every day. But luckily
a security guard came over to tell me that the
taxi drivers shared their sandwiches with these dogs. See kindness
begets kindness anyway, Soon enough, these new friends of mine
invited me to that Nanna's house. I heard the word
(09:50):
Nanna and was confused your Italian Egyptians who knew. So
now we're at dinner with my new friends in their
home and I discus of it that their grandpa runs
the original Parker Penn franchise in Cairo, and in his
spare time still works for Egypt Air as a sort
of happy maker. If only all airlines could employ such
(10:13):
a person. So I visited him the next day in
a dusty old storm downtown Cairo, and he showed me
this incredible collection of Parker pens that he's amassed over decades.
He's taken over this little shop of curiosity from his
father and now sells stationary. One of the pens had
Marilyn Monroe's signature on it, and another was actual solid gold.
(10:36):
So of course he and I became fast friends and
swapped travel stories. He would tell me about London, which
was his big destination when he worked for Egypt there,
and how he had no money and had to go
and find a place to stay on almost zero budget.
He would hunt out other Egyptians around Victoria's Station and
(10:57):
find a bed and home cooked food for five pounds.
This made me think about travel, that it wasn't just
about me well, this is how I felt when I
noticed the sour couple fighting with everyone at the boarding
gate in Palm Springs for a six am flight recently.
(11:19):
First off, they were yelling at the gate agent we
get on the plane. In the overhead space, they took
out other people's bags and threw them on the floor.
They fought with their seat mates. They fought with everyone,
and then they decide, before we'd even taken off, we'd
like to have drinks. Snap. Never mind that the flight
(11:40):
attendant was doing the security briefing. Just with the top
of the buck up, we're in the sky. They had
fought with their seat mates and then someone about overhead space,
just being miserable with every one. So when I saw
(12:02):
them ordering sandwiches and wraps and drinks, I'm not making
this up. At seven am flying Palm Springs to Florida,
I called the flight attendant. I gave her my credit
card and I said, I'm going to pay for that.
She looked at me like, are you crazy? And I decided,
no kindness begets kindness. Perhaps tonight, when they get onto
(12:24):
the cruise ship that they bound to be on from
Fort Lauderdale, maybe, just maybe they'll think about their entitlement
in their manners and think maybe I don't have to
get onto the cruise first. Some call me a believer.
When I was a rebellious teenager, I decided to run
away from home. I knew my parents would go to
(12:46):
a fancy travel agent office and book their travel, So
that's exactly where I went one day after school and
I booked a flight to Cape Town. The travel agent
had known me my entire life and she was used
booking travel for me, so she didn't even question this
devious transaction. She handed me a plastic folder with plane
(13:07):
tickets and hotel bookings whilst smiling, and off I went.
You can imagine what a smart idea this was. Right,
I was traveling solo, didn't care, and I was going
to find myself some freedom somehow. The world traveling rules
for a minor weren't that strict at this point, because
(13:28):
I doubt you could do this today. My parents were
fast asleep, and I quietly packed a small spots bag
with my favorite T shirts, some cool sunglasses because I
was an idiot, and my huge white brick iPod loaded
with Atlantis Morrissett's jagged Little pill platform sneakers, of course,
and this wad of cash that I had amassed. I
(13:52):
remember kissing the dogs goodbye and walking down the driveway
thinking I was ready for any adventure. I thought that
I was a grown up. Of course, mother figured it
out shortly and was on a plane to come and
fetch me. But before that happened, I did have a
few days of thrills. What do you do as a
(14:14):
teenager cruising around Cape Town. Well, you lie on the beach,
you lie about your age, and you order cocktails, and
then you go party all night at the nightclubs because
luckily you look roughly eighteen. The feeling of being untethered
stuck with me. I felt like there were no plans,
(14:34):
no rules, and I could just sip on this world
I now commandeered. But when I think back to this trip,
the things that I now remember are the small acts
of generosity people showed me. Next to me on the
escape aeroplane was a woman with eyes that I can
(14:54):
still recall right now. She looked at me and said,
I'm not sure what you've doing, but whatever it is,
remember to split your cash up and hide it all
over you, your shoe, the bottom of your bag, and
just leave a little in your wallet. I was all
kinds of silliness, probably flashing it around accidentally or something.
(15:18):
There was this night I was cruising around Longstreet, which
is the main drag in Cape Town where all the
bars and clubs are. It's notorious for fun and a
little trouble. I was just mulling around when someone pulled
a knife out, and I was such the fool that
I didn't quite know what to do. They wanted my bag,
of course, and my giant yellow Nokia cell phone that
(15:40):
had snakey as its main attraction. And I was probably
holding this in my hand for everyone to see. The
situation was harry and I was about to make a
run for it. And let's face it, I am a
long distance runner, not a sprinter. Out of a busy
bar fell these three big burly rugby players. They saw
(16:02):
what was happening and chased my assailant away. Chivalry for
a young gay teenager, Oh boy, generosity comes in so
many forms. In another vein, think about a fabulous weekend.
You planned with your closest friends to say New Orleans.
(16:27):
You flew first class on American Airlines, ching you booked
into the poncha train Ching. You found at James Beard
Nominee's restaurant to dine at Ching, and you had a
single malt all over town Ching, Ching. It's a treat.
But as my dearest friends let's just call them little
parents taught me, when you're spending on yourself, you could
(16:51):
also spend on others. What a way to travel, sharing
your freedoms with people who need it more than you
think of a small act of generosity, something that takes
very little to execute, so little you can just do
it yourself. It doesn't have to be money. Share what
(17:12):
you have with others and just see how that feels.
This is a great moment for us to travel to
advertising Land and we'll be right back with everywhere. Welcome
once again to Everywhere. Let's hop back to it. Every week,
I hang out in studio with my dearest friend Holly Fry,
(17:36):
co host of the ever popular history podcast Stuff You
Missed in History Class, And speaking of generosity, I have
my most generous friend Holly Fry with me. I don't
know that that's accurate, but I love that you talked
a bit in this particular episode about your travels in Egypt,
(17:57):
because Egypt of course, has a fascinating history all its own.
What is most known for is the museum Star Wars museum.
I wish um, I don't really wish. I mean Star
Wars museums are great, but I don't want to take
away from the majesty of the Egyptian Museum. Sometimes you'll
see it called the Museum of Egyptian Antiquities or other things,
(18:18):
and it is one of the most famous museums in
the world, I would say, But to me, what's really
interesting about it is it was not founded by a
native Egyptian but by a French person. Uh. And in
some ways it becomes about the story of kind of
the scramble for Africa and all of those European nations
trying to move into Egypt and Egypt and the rest
(18:40):
of Africa and just grab land and assets and get
as much as they could and kind of squeeze that
part of the world. And you understand intimately, so it's
really interesting. This man was named Auguste Marriette, and he
originally worked for the Louver and on his first trip
to Egypt, where he was I think supposed to be
getting scrolls, he ended up doing a four year dig
(19:03):
basically an archaeological dig, and he found a number of
really important discoveries and then he promptly shipped them away
to par and then he returned to the Louver and
became curator of their Egyptian collection. But he really felt
this tug back to North Africa and to Egypt in particular,
and so in eighteen fifty eight he moved to Egypt
(19:25):
permanently and actually they created a job for him the
Egyptian government as conservator of monuments. And at this point
he shifted his efforts once he lived in Egypt to
protect the fines of ancient Egypt and keep them there.
So he through his efforts and his work in the government,
he eliminated excavations that were not authorized, Like he really
(19:46):
started the crackdown of like people can't just come and
dig wherever they want, Like you have to have permits,
you have to get the permission of the government, blah
blah blah. And he also put in motion some legislation
that made it much more difficult to export antiquities under
the idea that it would preserve Egyptian culture and their
heritage there for the nation. I see where you're going
(20:07):
with this, generosity. I see there's a moment of generosity coming.
It is, but in this case you have to grain
of salt it a little bit because part of what
happened is a consequence of this, which I do not
think was an accident, was that then he kind of
had the monopoly on all of the digs in Egypt
because he was the one that was working for the government,
(20:28):
and thus all of his efforts got all of their
permits lickety split, no problems, and then they could kind
of keep other people at bay. So he was protecting
Egyptian heritage, which is inherently a really lovely idea, but
he also was cementing his place as the guy that
discovered everything, didn't I tell at the beginning of my
episode that generosity is exactly like this it is, which
(20:49):
is why I thought it was an interesting parallel. Speaking
of generosity, I have a good Egyptian story for you.
Do you know that in the sixties, the Egyptian government
gave as a beautiful gift to the Kennedy administration a
full temple and JFK was sick at the time, which
no one knew, and he was like, oh, I can
(21:10):
kudu Egypt right now, I'll send Jackie, and Jackie like
arrived in Egypt and they would like, pick any temple
you would like, and she was like, I'll take that one.
And so the Smithsonian called her and they were like,
we'll take it, no problem. When are you ready to deliver?
And she was like, oh, I don't know, I'm not
quite sure. And then the met called her and said,
(21:32):
we'll make you a deal. If you give it to us,
this giant temple, we will build a glass box for
it on Fifth Avenue so your apartment looks directly at it, right,
because originally everybody else wanted it to be stored in
an exterior location, which would have caused us demise. I
feel like we should also mention that she didn't just
(21:53):
get to go shopping through the wonders of Egypt. It
was wasn't it in a valley that was going to
be flooded. So it was like, if someone will press
or something, you take it great, if you can ship
it out, you can have it. So it wasn't quite
like we just went over and went. It seems more
Jackie Kennedy to just choose one, right. Well, that's why
they invited her to come and choose one were like,
(22:14):
choose from this area that is going to be generosity
to the world. Was that she could see from yes,
And now I mean the good thing is right. Anyone
can see it. You can go visit it at the
ment and it is quite spectacular. What else you want
to tell me about Egypt home? So I will touch
on the Grand Egyptian Museum, which is the one that
(22:34):
you were supposed to go on the tour of. It
is the biggest museum in the world. It's massive. And
what's really interesting is that the Egyptian Museum that I
was talking about earlier, while it does keep Egypt's wonders
there in Cairo, is twelve miles away from the Pyramids,
whereas this new museum is right there by the pyramids.
So a lot of the things that have been discovered
(22:55):
get to stay a little closer to home, so to speak,
like they're not at a remove from where they were
originally put. It's almost like the museum is institute. They
have more than a hundred thousand artifacts in that space,
including there's I have not been to see it personally,
but I've seen pictures. There is a thirty two year
old statue of Ramsey's the second that is unique and
amazing and will certainly give someone a sense of history
(23:17):
if they just stand in awe of it for a moment.
What's the guy who did Pan's Labyrinth, Germo del Toro? Right,
so he's house. Have you seen photos of that house?
Second house? That's just his collection, right, his collection toured.
It was in um Toronto in l A. They did
exhibits of it. That's cool. Last year. We should do that.
(23:40):
Let's do that. Let's go and see his collection. I
think we would have to go to his house at
this point. I don't think it's on display anywhere. We'll
just take a call. We'll just Germo, were coming, Yeah,
we're bringing Ella or coming or bringing a dog, will
be case of diet coke. There'll be no we need
to like Pan Labyrinth groupies. And then they'll be like, Okay, well,
(24:03):
you know I have a tattoo that is based on
a project of his that never came to Fruition, which
is his adaptation of Um. It's a little historically relevant,
not necessarily to this episode at the Mountains of Madness,
which is an HP Lovecraft book that he optioned and
had been working on and there's a m in that
book are these Antarctic penguin monsters. They're underground creatures and
(24:29):
they're blind, and they're very scary to the people that
encounter them initially, but they it turns out there just harmless.
They just look frightening. And I actually have a tattoo
of one of them as a reminder that things that
seem scary often are not. But it is based on
the designs that he was doing for that movie. What
appears to be scary and is not often is not.
(24:51):
But what like what like all kinds of things, like
for some people, sitting on a mic and talking about
their life experiences would be terrifying, but once you get
them rolling, it's often very delightful to share and be
reflective about your life. And so things like last night,
I was at the cocktail party with my husband and
I am like in my element. I was like the jokes,
(25:11):
they're making fun and having like a little dance, and
Michael was petrified standing in the corner quietly. I understand.
But if you just get in and mix it up
a little, it's fun and it's not scary anymore. I
introduced him to like business people that he could actually
do work with. And I was like, so tell them
about organic farma and Michael's like it was like, yeah,
(25:32):
so it's this healthy food vending machine and he was like, yes,
well and to tie it into more relevancy. Right. For
some people, traveling abroad is very scary, but once you're
actually in a place and you find something familiar, like
a Star Wars convention, a Pan Labyrinth, Egyptian museum, or
(25:53):
just like you realize that every one around the globe
is a person and they're not any different fundamentally from
any of us. They may have grown up in different circumstances,
but you realize that you can connect with all these
people and that travel is in fact really delightful and
not so scared. Well, thanks Holly for coming in and
chatting to me and making me laugh. How generous of you.
(26:13):
It is in fact selfish because it is a great
delight to me, and you can talk about yours show
stuff you missed an history class, which if people want
to check that out, you can do that at missed
in history dot com or find us anywhere on social
media as missed in History. This is a great moment
for us to travel once again to advertising Land. We'll
be right back with more Everywhere. Thanks for sticking around.
(26:37):
Here's more of Everywhere. Welcome back. I was recently in
Raleigh with my brother from another mother, Van Noltha, who
owns a number of restaurants, including Beta Manda. Van came
to America as an adopted kid to a family in
North Carolina. Today he's the official mayor of Raleigh. In fact,
(27:03):
the mayor himself told me that he uses more generosity
in a day then most people could conjure up in
a lifetime. So I recorded your your introduction, and it
was such a special moment that I had thinking about
you in our friendship and how I feel very grateful
(27:25):
that I met you. You feel to me like a brother,
a brother from another mother and from another world. And
it's funny that I was born in Africa and you
were born in Asia, and somehow we found each other
in America, across the oceans. Here I find someone who
feels like my twin. And I had this beautiful moment
(27:47):
where I was wondering, how do I introduce someone like
that in the world. And I thought of this moment
when one of the first times I met you, we
were in Raleigh, North Carolina, and it was your birthday
and you were having a little event, and the mayor
of North Carolina introduced you to a room full of
people as the most important person in all of town,
(28:12):
the immigrant that has come, the gay boy that has come,
the Asian boy that's come from abroad and brought a
city together and has taught a city about generosity. And
I talk about you two people all the time. My
friend Van, if only you could learn from him. So Van,
(28:35):
let's talk about when we met, and let's talk about
how Long Probang and Lao has such an incredible culture,
an incredible tradition of generosity, and how people can learn
from that. Yes, even though I left Long Probang when
I was twelve years old tony one years ago, I
(28:59):
learned a lot about that from that place. But the
one thing that I learned um the most on, the
thing that continued to be really vibrant in my life
and how I live and dance in this war, is
how to be generous and kind. Um. My grandmother was
extremely generous in how she raised her children. My mother
(29:19):
continued that tradition. So I think there's a strong tradition
of giving in our family culture, but Long Probang itself
has its own rhythm in which is consider itself to
be a generous host. One of my favorite things about
Long Probang is the arms giving a ceremony. Every morning
(29:40):
about four or four thirty heavy families would wake up
to cook rice to offer two months. And when the
race is fully cooked, we would put on our best
clothes and would line up on a sidewalk and loan Probang.
It's this mystical place. Um five o'clock in the morning,
(30:02):
you have two rivers coming together and the sky opens
up just a little bit so you can feel the
purple and pink hue on your neighbor's faces. And everyone
would line up on the street with a bolt rice
in silence, and we just kind of wait and wait
(30:24):
and wait, and all the sudden a pio comage of
months come down the street, and that's a frown color
glow from the monk's rope just illuminated everything, and there's
no climax. Months come by and we offer rice. That's
(30:45):
the first thing we do in the morning in a
change for wisdom. I think there's something really special about
that tradition about beginning a day, marking that day a
sacred day by giving rice in exchangeable wisdom. I try
to continue that tradition in my life here in the States,
(31:09):
not just arms giving, but what it means to live
each day generously. Rice is a really powerful um cooking
ingredient for our culture, but rice also represent this moment
of humility in giving um. So rice is the word
(31:30):
for rice in Laotian is cow and cow it's the
same word that we use for the color white, for
the ideal purity, but cow is also the word for
to bridge. And I just love that picture waking up
and exchange this humble ingredient for wisdom. It is one
(31:54):
of those things that stays with me, especially in the
work that we do in the States. Um. There's a
lot of conflicts and change in our lives, and what
we are trying to practice at a restaurant is what
happened if we extended generosity first. I think with this
arm or conflicts, when we were the first person to say,
(32:16):
let me make you some rice, let me pour you
a cup of coffee. Can we talk about it, But
I think there's something really profound about being the first
person to start that relationship of generosity. Then I find
it so hard to not be moved by long profound
(32:38):
I remember the first time I went there. It's this
little town that you could almost miss. No one tells
you to go to Llao. It's not on the map
as a tourist destination. And that's why I went there.
And I was looking for for understanding. I was looking
for humanity there, and that's where I how to be
(33:01):
generous because people were just generous. It seems so second
nature to everyone. No one was thinking in any other
way than in this beautiful way of generosity. So I
experienced that that. But then when I met you at
your restaurant and your brewery in Raleigh, North Carolina, I
(33:22):
sense that so you had somehow managed to bring that
to America. Maybe what you need to talk about is
your journey from a child sent away by your parents
for a better life. Yes, um, I got home and
(33:42):
Mom and dad mentioned to me that you're living and
you're going to the States. I was twelve years old.
My sister also came to the States a year after.
We were adopted by the same family. Speaking of generosity, right,
how how generous it was for my parents to be
so giving to not to not having the selfishness to
(34:07):
hold on to things that they loved. They knew it
was better for us to leave. We didn't see each
other again until it was eighteen. It was such a
difficult six years, long six years, But I can't imagine
how much more difficult it was for my parents. Do
not get to see the two children becoming an adult,
(34:30):
missing birthdays and sickness, And I think that was an
act of generosity when my parents decided to give me away. Um.
When I arrived in Greensboro, North Carolina, I also experienced
the generosity for so many different people that really held
(34:51):
on to my sister and I making sure that we
felt safe and making sure that we knew we would
love even though we were so far from home. So
in thinking about how do we live generously right now,
whether that's at work or personal life, I think it's
a product of all of those people and faces who
(35:13):
chose to be kind and generous with us, And I
think we are just a part of that of that journey.
How do you feel you've infused that into your business?
One of the things that we practice it's how do
we meet our guests where they are, whether that's a table,
(35:36):
grieving a family's death or a celebration. We are training
our staff and inviting them to really show up fully
because I think when we actually show up fully for
a table or for a friend, for not a person,
our presence is probably the most generous things we could offer. UM,
(35:58):
we hope to generous with our staff. One of the
things that we carry really close to our heart as
a community is everyone that's working for us now over
two get to define what is the most meaningful thing
about this job that's relevant in their life journey. So
(36:19):
whether that is being a diswasher or being a server,
we really want to make sure that our team and
our staff members identify what is it about this job
as meaningful in my life journey. So I think we
try really hard to see the humanity in everything. UM.
Restaurant work can be really really mundane. And how do
(36:43):
we teach and mentor each other to go through this
mundane work by assigning meanings to them and and and
doing with generosity and kindness along the way. I'm crying, UM,
you are the reason why I did the show. Why
I'm doing this like this is my belief in the world.
(37:05):
I think what we should talk about is how travel
can teach your generosity. Yes, I love places like Luan
Proban when I travel. I love going to places that
doesn't have a big monument or something major that you
must do. You know when when you're in Luan Paban
and there really isn't much to see or do. And
(37:29):
I think when we show up to just be, I
think it asks ourselves. It asked us to do a
lot of deep listening and deep observation. And just by
watching a culture move, just by watching time changes, I
think we are a lot more in sync with our
own heart and our own life and our own rhythm.
(37:51):
I love traveling because it makes me understand me better.
I love going to those places because there's places ask
me to show up in a different manner. How do
you think we can help people get in touch with that?
You know this because it's your culture, You've brought it
(38:12):
from your childhood into your world here. But how can
we inspire people who are listening, people that want to
travel or don't know how to travel, Like some people
can't go to Long Parong. But I think you need
to be able to apply this principle even when you
go to New Jersey or Disney World or wherever you're
going for a weekend away. Some people can't get onto
(38:35):
a plane and go to Paris or South Africa. So
I want to understand how can we get people to
understand this principle and to take this beautiful principle everywhere.
I think when we are at home, we have our
own rhythms and rituals and ceremonies that we subscribe to
that that's what we do every day. And I think
(38:59):
when we travel, I think it put us in a
place where we are slightly uncomfortable, so that we are
more mindful of the things that we do and not
just doing them because that's our rhythm and a ritual.
So I think traveling so much of it is about
being mindful of your own place in the world, but
also being mindful of what's happening around you. And I
(39:22):
think when you are actually at a place and at
a state of discomfort, you are forced to be more
of a sponge you absorb more. I love the story
that my parents used to tell me about the Buddha
that I think about when I try to live each
day like I'm traveling. The Buddha was walking around how
(39:45):
one day during almsgiving and an old man came up
to him and say, so, what do you and your
months do at the temple that that makes you a Buddhist?
And the Buddhas say, we eat, we sleep, and we walk.
And the old man was so perplex it was like,
(40:05):
I do that too, I do that too. What's the difference?
And the Buddha said, in our tradition, when we eat,
we know that we are eating. When we sleep, we
know that we are sleeping, and when we walk, we
know that we are walking. I think that's what traveling is.
(40:27):
When we are walking through a new road, or when
we try a new dish for the first time, we
are fully there. We know that we are life, and
we are grateful to be breathing. And I think if
we can develop that kind of living, that kind of awakness,
(40:48):
I think we can travel anywhere, even within our own
home and our own neighborhood, and we can see our
neighbors as if we are seeing them for the first
com and perhaps we see all of their home maladies too. Well.
The Dala Lama is going to retire and if someone
(41:11):
needs to take over. Thank you. Thanks for hanging out.
Connect with us on Twitter at Everywhere Pond, Instagram, at
Everywhere podcast, or on the website at everywhere podcast dot com.
(41:32):
Of course, I couldn't have done any of this without
my executive producers, Christopher Hats and the loveliest of lovely
Holly Fry. A big thank you to my lead producer
and editor Chandler Mays, and also co editor and creative
the soundtrack Tristan McNeil. I am your host, Daniel Scheffler,
(41:53):
and as I'd like to say, good boys go to
Heaven and bad Boys Everywhere. For more podcasts from I
Heart Radio, visit the I heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts,
or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
Hi. I'm Daniel Scheffler, and this is everywhere I've spent
the majority of my life circling the globe. I have
fed stray dogs in Cairo for a day, been tattooed
in the back of a jewelry store in Istanbul, and
I've joined a chef to seek out new sources of
protein in the Amazon. So I want to tell you
how I travel and how you can travel. I don't
(00:26):
like lists or must us. I don't care about aspirational
luxury nonsense. In fact, while we're at it, let's throw
out that word luxury altogether. You are being conned. It
doesn't matter if you're wealthy or not alone or with
your personal people. You can have an amazing adventure anywhere.
(00:47):
All you need is an open mind. Don't think about
what I'm telling you, just feel it. It's not a
head knowledge, it's all heart knowledge. Come with me and
I'll show you every where. Every week you will hear
(01:09):
me mention my travel commandments. As much as commandments sound
religious in this context, they absolutely are not. However, they
slightly tied to a little bit of ethics and a
little bit of that thing we could call moral imperative.
If you will, So take these with a pinch of
salt and throw them over your suitcase or whatever. What
(01:31):
they really are is just a sort of guideline that
hopefully will enrich your travel life as it has mine.
You'll also notice that my commandments are not in the negative,
but rather in the positive. Thou shalt so go forth
and shalt away and see what happens this week. Perhaps
(01:53):
thou shalt be generous? Why do we talk about generosity?
Isn't being generous something you quietly practice in the world.
But alas humans are more complicated than that, perhaps in
every performance of generosity there's a little selfish and self
(02:15):
serving nodule, and we're just too uneasy to admit it.
Don't see me, but see me as I bestow you
with my humble generosity. In our very humanity, we tend
to be ingredients of both self serving and generous. So
stay with me here. My philosophy is that sometimes talking
(02:39):
about benevolence that happens whilst on the road does absolutely
inspire others to offer up a little extra of whatever
it may be, kindness or dollars. So it's with the
sentiment that I share some of the bigheartedness that I've experienced.
For instance, in Lao, there's a tradition called arms or
(03:04):
alms giving, which involves giving to others as an act
of virtue. It's either material or it's in the sense
of providing capabilities like free education. Law is the unexplored
sister of the tread Cambodia, Vietnam and Lao. She holds
these deep secrets and traditions that whisper only to her visitors.
(03:27):
When you walk the dusty streets of a sweet town
like Lung Probang, which is a UNESCO Heritage Site, you
might hear locals talking quietly about the Lao New Year
dubbed Songkrun. This yearly festival in April marks the start
of the monsoon season, and compared to any of the
neighboring countries, maintains this authentic tradition. Subtle festivities rise there
(03:52):
with the sun, and in Lng Probang, you wake up
early in the morning with the gentle sound of a
gong five am. The sun hasn't risen, and you sort
of scatter out onto the side of the street and
have a seat just on the sidewalk, and they usit
with a little ball filled with rice, and as the
(04:15):
sun starts to come up, this incredible thing happens where
hundreds and hundreds of monks start to walk, all dressed
in saffron robes, all over the town. As these monks
passed me in total silence, I offer each a handful
of rice. With my other hand, I touched my heart.
(04:40):
Each shaved headed monk with swelled robes, carrying their own
golden ball, stops for his libation. And in the eyes
of the monk I see myself. We become these mirrors
of each other, showing each other our humanity, our kindness,
and our generosity. I believe you can only see in
(05:02):
others what you have in yourself. So when you see
hatred or anger, or maybe even joy, it's because you
recognize it within yourself. Here, the monk and I mirror
our most special essence, generosity. I offer simple rice, and
he offers me this wisdom and this moment to see
(05:23):
myself clearly. It's here and now, a country untainted and
filled with nature, where these quiet commemorations aren't offer to you.
Every day, A slow pace of understated life murmurs and
keeps you in the present time, exactly where you belong.
(05:44):
Let's take a break to hear from our sponsors, and
we'll be right back with more travel from everywhere trade
tables up, you're returning to everywhere land m and acts
of generosity aren't always where you expect them. For instance,
(06:06):
in Egypt, the main attraction is probably the Pyramids, but
I was here for the new Cairo Museum's soft opening
hard hat tour. I rocked up at the museum, but
my fancy tour was canceled. I didn't worry too much
because I had seen the Pyramids, and Cairo has over
twenty million people, so surely there was an adventure to
(06:28):
be had. I was strolling around and found the city's
famed citadel that looks across this ancient metropolis, and I
saw the speck of stray puppies. I decided to go
to a vendor. I knew they served chicken, as they
had these badly photoshopped food items on massive posters outside
(06:49):
the door. I peeked my head in English. France says
English would do, and I said to the man who
works there, good sir, if I give you a hundred dollars,
how much food would that be? The gentleman's eyes enlarged,
and he chatted to his kitchen crew and came back
to me a lot, he said, I said great. About
(07:13):
forty five minutes later, I was standing next to this
towering mosque holding boxes and boxes of food. No, I
wasn't then hungry. This was for my pack of stray dogs.
It was hard for me to open all these styre
foam and cardboard boxes fast enough as the puppies descended
on me. A few dozen of them stormed this feast.
(07:35):
And then there was a group of students that were
studying under the trees, and they came to assist. And
the dogs were like playing and mistaking our fingers for
chicken breasts. And suddenly the students and I had this
thing in common. We had broken through awkwardness and cultural difference,
(07:56):
and suddenly I had stopped being the other, and so
had they. We exchanged names, and we played with the puppies,
and eventually we were pup feeders and friends. So all
these beautiful stories came out of this experience. And I
was just feeding these crazy dogs. And I have a
(08:16):
photo of one of the dogs. She had eight puppies.
They had all eaten, and the puppies went out playing,
and she ran up to me, and she stepped with
one paul onto my knee and looked at me in
a moment of absolute gratitude, her eyes letting me in
behind hers, and time stood still, and we stayed in
(08:42):
this trance for a long time, just being to being
fully connected. And she gone off my knee and went
on with her day and took her puppies. And this
is the same look I have with Ella, my dog,
who's in studio with me and having a little snow
as we speak. She looks at me behind my eyes.
(09:06):
She sees what I wish I could see in myself,
and I look at her beyond into being a matter
and atom. When you asked me what's the best thing
I did in Egypt, it was feeding the stray dogs,
not going to the pyramids. So of course all I
(09:29):
wanted was to either take all these dogs home with
me or come and feed them every day. But luckily
a security guard came over to tell me that the
taxi drivers shared their sandwiches with these dogs. See kindness
begets kindness anyway, Soon enough, these new friends of mine
invited me to that Nanna's house. I heard the word
(09:50):
Nanna and was confused your Italian Egyptians who knew. So
now we're at dinner with my new friends in their
home and I discus of it that their grandpa runs
the original Parker Penn franchise in Cairo, and in his
spare time still works for Egypt Air as a sort
of happy maker. If only all airlines could employ such
(10:13):
a person. So I visited him the next day in
a dusty old storm downtown Cairo, and he showed me
this incredible collection of Parker pens that he's amassed over decades.
He's taken over this little shop of curiosity from his
father and now sells stationary. One of the pens had
Marilyn Monroe's signature on it, and another was actual solid gold.
(10:36):
So of course he and I became fast friends and
swapped travel stories. He would tell me about London, which
was his big destination when he worked for Egypt there,
and how he had no money and had to go
and find a place to stay on almost zero budget.
He would hunt out other Egyptians around Victoria's Station and
(10:57):
find a bed and home cooked food for five pounds.
This made me think about travel, that it wasn't just
about me well, this is how I felt when I
noticed the sour couple fighting with everyone at the boarding
gate in Palm Springs for a six am flight recently.
(11:19):
First off, they were yelling at the gate agent we
get on the plane. In the overhead space, they took
out other people's bags and threw them on the floor.
They fought with their seat mates. They fought with everyone,
and then they decide, before we'd even taken off, we'd
like to have drinks. Snap. Never mind that the flight
(11:40):
attendant was doing the security briefing. Just with the top
of the buck up, we're in the sky. They had
fought with their seat mates and then someone about overhead space,
just being miserable with every one. So when I saw
(12:02):
them ordering sandwiches and wraps and drinks, I'm not making
this up. At seven am flying Palm Springs to Florida,
I called the flight attendant. I gave her my credit
card and I said, I'm going to pay for that.
She looked at me like, are you crazy? And I decided,
no kindness begets kindness. Perhaps tonight, when they get onto
(12:24):
the cruise ship that they bound to be on from
Fort Lauderdale, maybe, just maybe they'll think about their entitlement
in their manners and think maybe I don't have to
get onto the cruise first. Some call me a believer.
When I was a rebellious teenager, I decided to run
away from home. I knew my parents would go to
(12:46):
a fancy travel agent office and book their travel, So
that's exactly where I went one day after school and
I booked a flight to Cape Town. The travel agent
had known me my entire life and she was used
booking travel for me, so she didn't even question this
devious transaction. She handed me a plastic folder with plane
(13:07):
tickets and hotel bookings whilst smiling, and off I went.
You can imagine what a smart idea this was. Right,
I was traveling solo, didn't care, and I was going
to find myself some freedom somehow. The world traveling rules
for a minor weren't that strict at this point, because
(13:28):
I doubt you could do this today. My parents were
fast asleep, and I quietly packed a small spots bag
with my favorite T shirts, some cool sunglasses because I
was an idiot, and my huge white brick iPod loaded
with Atlantis Morrissett's jagged Little pill platform sneakers, of course,
and this wad of cash that I had amassed. I
(13:52):
remember kissing the dogs goodbye and walking down the driveway
thinking I was ready for any adventure. I thought that
I was a grown up. Of course, mother figured it
out shortly and was on a plane to come and
fetch me. But before that happened, I did have a
few days of thrills. What do you do as a
(14:14):
teenager cruising around Cape Town. Well, you lie on the beach,
you lie about your age, and you order cocktails, and
then you go party all night at the nightclubs because
luckily you look roughly eighteen. The feeling of being untethered
stuck with me. I felt like there were no plans,
(14:34):
no rules, and I could just sip on this world
I now commandeered. But when I think back to this trip,
the things that I now remember are the small acts
of generosity people showed me. Next to me on the
escape aeroplane was a woman with eyes that I can
(14:54):
still recall right now. She looked at me and said,
I'm not sure what you've doing, but whatever it is,
remember to split your cash up and hide it all
over you, your shoe, the bottom of your bag, and
just leave a little in your wallet. I was all
kinds of silliness, probably flashing it around accidentally or something.
(15:18):
There was this night I was cruising around Longstreet, which
is the main drag in Cape Town where all the
bars and clubs are. It's notorious for fun and a
little trouble. I was just mulling around when someone pulled
a knife out, and I was such the fool that
I didn't quite know what to do. They wanted my bag,
of course, and my giant yellow Nokia cell phone that
(15:40):
had snakey as its main attraction. And I was probably
holding this in my hand for everyone to see. The
situation was harry and I was about to make a
run for it. And let's face it, I am a
long distance runner, not a sprinter. Out of a busy
bar fell these three big burly rugby players. They saw
(16:02):
what was happening and chased my assailant away. Chivalry for
a young gay teenager, Oh boy, generosity comes in so
many forms. In another vein, think about a fabulous weekend.
You planned with your closest friends to say New Orleans.
(16:27):
You flew first class on American Airlines, ching you booked
into the poncha train Ching. You found at James Beard
Nominee's restaurant to dine at Ching, and you had a
single malt all over town Ching, Ching. It's a treat.
But as my dearest friends let's just call them little
parents taught me, when you're spending on yourself, you could
(16:51):
also spend on others. What a way to travel, sharing
your freedoms with people who need it more than you
think of a small act of generosity, something that takes
very little to execute, so little you can just do
it yourself. It doesn't have to be money. Share what
(17:12):
you have with others and just see how that feels.
This is a great moment for us to travel to
advertising Land and we'll be right back with everywhere. Welcome
once again to Everywhere. Let's hop back to it. Every week,
I hang out in studio with my dearest friend Holly Fry,
(17:36):
co host of the ever popular history podcast Stuff You
Missed in History Class, And speaking of generosity, I have
my most generous friend Holly Fry with me. I don't
know that that's accurate, but I love that you talked
a bit in this particular episode about your travels in Egypt,
(17:57):
because Egypt of course, has a fascinating history all its own.
What is most known for is the museum Star Wars museum.
I wish um, I don't really wish. I mean Star
Wars museums are great, but I don't want to take
away from the majesty of the Egyptian Museum. Sometimes you'll
see it called the Museum of Egyptian Antiquities or other things,
(18:18):
and it is one of the most famous museums in
the world, I would say, But to me, what's really
interesting about it is it was not founded by a
native Egyptian but by a French person. Uh. And in
some ways it becomes about the story of kind of
the scramble for Africa and all of those European nations
trying to move into Egypt and Egypt and the rest
(18:40):
of Africa and just grab land and assets and get
as much as they could and kind of squeeze that
part of the world. And you understand intimately, so it's
really interesting. This man was named Auguste Marriette, and he
originally worked for the Louver and on his first trip
to Egypt, where he was I think supposed to be
getting scrolls, he ended up doing a four year dig
(19:03):
basically an archaeological dig, and he found a number of
really important discoveries and then he promptly shipped them away
to par and then he returned to the Louver and
became curator of their Egyptian collection. But he really felt
this tug back to North Africa and to Egypt in particular,
and so in eighteen fifty eight he moved to Egypt
(19:25):
permanently and actually they created a job for him the
Egyptian government as conservator of monuments. And at this point
he shifted his efforts once he lived in Egypt to
protect the fines of ancient Egypt and keep them there.
So he through his efforts and his work in the government,
he eliminated excavations that were not authorized, Like he really
(19:46):
started the crackdown of like people can't just come and
dig wherever they want, Like you have to have permits,
you have to get the permission of the government, blah
blah blah. And he also put in motion some legislation
that made it much more difficult to export antiquities under
the idea that it would preserve Egyptian culture and their
heritage there for the nation. I see where you're going
(20:07):
with this, generosity. I see there's a moment of generosity coming.
It is, but in this case you have to grain
of salt it a little bit because part of what
happened is a consequence of this, which I do not
think was an accident, was that then he kind of
had the monopoly on all of the digs in Egypt
because he was the one that was working for the government,
(20:28):
and thus all of his efforts got all of their
permits lickety split, no problems, and then they could kind
of keep other people at bay. So he was protecting
Egyptian heritage, which is inherently a really lovely idea, but
he also was cementing his place as the guy that
discovered everything, didn't I tell at the beginning of my
episode that generosity is exactly like this it is, which
(20:49):
is why I thought it was an interesting parallel. Speaking
of generosity, I have a good Egyptian story for you.
Do you know that in the sixties, the Egyptian government
gave as a beautiful gift to the Kennedy administration a
full temple and JFK was sick at the time, which
no one knew, and he was like, oh, I can
(21:10):
kudu Egypt right now, I'll send Jackie, and Jackie like
arrived in Egypt and they would like, pick any temple
you would like, and she was like, I'll take that one.
And so the Smithsonian called her and they were like,
we'll take it, no problem. When are you ready to deliver?
And she was like, oh, I don't know, I'm not
quite sure. And then the met called her and said,
(21:32):
we'll make you a deal. If you give it to us,
this giant temple, we will build a glass box for
it on Fifth Avenue so your apartment looks directly at it, right,
because originally everybody else wanted it to be stored in
an exterior location, which would have caused us demise. I
feel like we should also mention that she didn't just
(21:53):
get to go shopping through the wonders of Egypt. It
was wasn't it in a valley that was going to
be flooded. So it was like, if someone will press
or something, you take it great, if you can ship
it out, you can have it. So it wasn't quite
like we just went over and went. It seems more
Jackie Kennedy to just choose one, right. Well, that's why
they invited her to come and choose one were like,
(22:14):
choose from this area that is going to be generosity
to the world. Was that she could see from yes,
And now I mean the good thing is right. Anyone
can see it. You can go visit it at the
ment and it is quite spectacular. What else you want
to tell me about Egypt home? So I will touch
on the Grand Egyptian Museum, which is the one that
(22:34):
you were supposed to go on the tour of. It
is the biggest museum in the world. It's massive. And
what's really interesting is that the Egyptian Museum that I
was talking about earlier, while it does keep Egypt's wonders
there in Cairo, is twelve miles away from the Pyramids,
whereas this new museum is right there by the pyramids.
So a lot of the things that have been discovered
(22:55):
get to stay a little closer to home, so to speak,
like they're not at a remove from where they were
originally put. It's almost like the museum is institute. They
have more than a hundred thousand artifacts in that space,
including there's I have not been to see it personally,
but I've seen pictures. There is a thirty two year
old statue of Ramsey's the second that is unique and
amazing and will certainly give someone a sense of history
(23:17):
if they just stand in awe of it for a moment.
What's the guy who did Pan's Labyrinth, Germo del Toro? Right,
so he's house. Have you seen photos of that house?
Second house? That's just his collection, right, his collection toured.
It was in um Toronto in l A. They did
exhibits of it. That's cool. Last year. We should do that.
(23:40):
Let's do that. Let's go and see his collection. I
think we would have to go to his house at
this point. I don't think it's on display anywhere. We'll
just take a call. We'll just Germo, were coming, Yeah,
we're bringing Ella or coming or bringing a dog, will
be case of diet coke. There'll be no we need
to like Pan Labyrinth groupies. And then they'll be like, Okay, well,
(24:03):
you know I have a tattoo that is based on
a project of his that never came to Fruition, which
is his adaptation of Um. It's a little historically relevant,
not necessarily to this episode at the Mountains of Madness,
which is an HP Lovecraft book that he optioned and
had been working on and there's a m in that
book are these Antarctic penguin monsters. They're underground creatures and
(24:29):
they're blind, and they're very scary to the people that
encounter them initially, but they it turns out there just harmless.
They just look frightening. And I actually have a tattoo
of one of them as a reminder that things that
seem scary often are not. But it is based on
the designs that he was doing for that movie. What
appears to be scary and is not often is not.
(24:51):
But what like what like all kinds of things, like
for some people, sitting on a mic and talking about
their life experiences would be terrifying, but once you get
them rolling, it's often very delightful to share and be
reflective about your life. And so things like last night,
I was at the cocktail party with my husband and
I am like in my element. I was like the jokes,
(25:11):
they're making fun and having like a little dance, and
Michael was petrified standing in the corner quietly. I understand.
But if you just get in and mix it up
a little, it's fun and it's not scary anymore. I
introduced him to like business people that he could actually
do work with. And I was like, so tell them
about organic farma and Michael's like it was like, yeah,
(25:32):
so it's this healthy food vending machine and he was like, yes,
well and to tie it into more relevancy. Right. For
some people, traveling abroad is very scary, but once you're
actually in a place and you find something familiar, like
a Star Wars convention, a Pan Labyrinth, Egyptian museum, or
(25:53):
just like you realize that every one around the globe
is a person and they're not any different fundamentally from
any of us. They may have grown up in different circumstances,
but you realize that you can connect with all these
people and that travel is in fact really delightful and
not so scared. Well, thanks Holly for coming in and
chatting to me and making me laugh. How generous of you.
(26:13):
It is in fact selfish because it is a great
delight to me, and you can talk about yours show
stuff you missed an history class, which if people want
to check that out, you can do that at missed
in history dot com or find us anywhere on social
media as missed in History. This is a great moment
for us to travel once again to advertising Land. We'll
be right back with more Everywhere. Thanks for sticking around.
(26:37):
Here's more of Everywhere. Welcome back. I was recently in
Raleigh with my brother from another mother, Van Noltha, who
owns a number of restaurants, including Beta Manda. Van came
to America as an adopted kid to a family in
North Carolina. Today he's the official mayor of Raleigh. In fact,
(27:03):
the mayor himself told me that he uses more generosity
in a day then most people could conjure up in
a lifetime. So I recorded your your introduction, and it
was such a special moment that I had thinking about
you in our friendship and how I feel very grateful
(27:25):
that I met you. You feel to me like a brother,
a brother from another mother and from another world. And
it's funny that I was born in Africa and you
were born in Asia, and somehow we found each other
in America, across the oceans. Here I find someone who
feels like my twin. And I had this beautiful moment
(27:47):
where I was wondering, how do I introduce someone like
that in the world. And I thought of this moment
when one of the first times I met you, we
were in Raleigh, North Carolina, and it was your birthday
and you were having a little event, and the mayor
of North Carolina introduced you to a room full of
people as the most important person in all of town,
(28:12):
the immigrant that has come, the gay boy that has come,
the Asian boy that's come from abroad and brought a
city together and has taught a city about generosity. And
I talk about you two people all the time. My
friend Van, if only you could learn from him. So Van,
(28:35):
let's talk about when we met, and let's talk about
how Long Probang and Lao has such an incredible culture,
an incredible tradition of generosity, and how people can learn
from that. Yes, even though I left Long Probang when
I was twelve years old tony one years ago, I
(28:59):
learned a lot about that from that place. But the
one thing that I learned um the most on, the
thing that continued to be really vibrant in my life
and how I live and dance in this war, is
how to be generous and kind. Um. My grandmother was
extremely generous in how she raised her children. My mother
(29:19):
continued that tradition. So I think there's a strong tradition
of giving in our family culture, but Long Probang itself
has its own rhythm in which is consider itself to
be a generous host. One of my favorite things about
Long Probang is the arms giving a ceremony. Every morning
(29:40):
about four or four thirty heavy families would wake up
to cook rice to offer two months. And when the
race is fully cooked, we would put on our best
clothes and would line up on a sidewalk and loan Probang.
It's this mystical place. Um five o'clock in the morning,
(30:02):
you have two rivers coming together and the sky opens
up just a little bit so you can feel the
purple and pink hue on your neighbor's faces. And everyone
would line up on the street with a bolt rice
in silence, and we just kind of wait and wait
(30:24):
and wait, and all the sudden a pio comage of
months come down the street, and that's a frown color
glow from the monk's rope just illuminated everything, and there's
no climax. Months come by and we offer rice. That's
(30:45):
the first thing we do in the morning in a
change for wisdom. I think there's something really special about
that tradition about beginning a day, marking that day a
sacred day by giving rice in exchangeable wisdom. I try
to continue that tradition in my life here in the States,
(31:09):
not just arms giving, but what it means to live
each day generously. Rice is a really powerful um cooking
ingredient for our culture, but rice also represent this moment
of humility in giving um. So rice is the word
(31:30):
for rice in Laotian is cow and cow it's the
same word that we use for the color white, for
the ideal purity, but cow is also the word for
to bridge. And I just love that picture waking up
and exchange this humble ingredient for wisdom. It is one
(31:54):
of those things that stays with me, especially in the
work that we do in the States. Um. There's a
lot of conflicts and change in our lives, and what
we are trying to practice at a restaurant is what
happened if we extended generosity first. I think with this
arm or conflicts, when we were the first person to say,
(32:16):
let me make you some rice, let me pour you
a cup of coffee. Can we talk about it, But
I think there's something really profound about being the first
person to start that relationship of generosity. Then I find
it so hard to not be moved by long profound
(32:38):
I remember the first time I went there. It's this
little town that you could almost miss. No one tells
you to go to Llao. It's not on the map
as a tourist destination. And that's why I went there.
And I was looking for for understanding. I was looking
for humanity there, and that's where I how to be
(33:01):
generous because people were just generous. It seems so second
nature to everyone. No one was thinking in any other
way than in this beautiful way of generosity. So I
experienced that that. But then when I met you at
your restaurant and your brewery in Raleigh, North Carolina, I
(33:22):
sense that so you had somehow managed to bring that
to America. Maybe what you need to talk about is
your journey from a child sent away by your parents
for a better life. Yes, um, I got home and
(33:42):
Mom and dad mentioned to me that you're living and
you're going to the States. I was twelve years old.
My sister also came to the States a year after.
We were adopted by the same family. Speaking of generosity, right,
how how generous it was for my parents to be
so giving to not to not having the selfishness to
(34:07):
hold on to things that they loved. They knew it
was better for us to leave. We didn't see each
other again until it was eighteen. It was such a
difficult six years, long six years, But I can't imagine
how much more difficult it was for my parents. Do
not get to see the two children becoming an adult,
(34:30):
missing birthdays and sickness, And I think that was an
act of generosity when my parents decided to give me away. Um.
When I arrived in Greensboro, North Carolina, I also experienced
the generosity for so many different people that really held
(34:51):
on to my sister and I making sure that we
felt safe and making sure that we knew we would
love even though we were so far from home. So
in thinking about how do we live generously right now,
whether that's at work or personal life, I think it's
a product of all of those people and faces who
(35:13):
chose to be kind and generous with us, And I
think we are just a part of that of that journey.
How do you feel you've infused that into your business?
One of the things that we practice it's how do
we meet our guests where they are, whether that's a table,
(35:36):
grieving a family's death or a celebration. We are training
our staff and inviting them to really show up fully
because I think when we actually show up fully for
a table or for a friend, for not a person,
our presence is probably the most generous things we could offer. UM,
(35:58):
we hope to generous with our staff. One of the
things that we carry really close to our heart as
a community is everyone that's working for us now over
two get to define what is the most meaningful thing
about this job that's relevant in their life journey. So
(36:19):
whether that is being a diswasher or being a server,
we really want to make sure that our team and
our staff members identify what is it about this job
as meaningful in my life journey. So I think we
try really hard to see the humanity in everything. UM.
Restaurant work can be really really mundane. And how do
(36:43):
we teach and mentor each other to go through this
mundane work by assigning meanings to them and and and
doing with generosity and kindness along the way. I'm crying, UM,
you are the reason why I did the show. Why
I'm doing this like this is my belief in the world.
(37:05):
I think what we should talk about is how travel
can teach your generosity. Yes, I love places like Luan
Proban when I travel. I love going to places that
doesn't have a big monument or something major that you
must do. You know when when you're in Luan Paban
and there really isn't much to see or do. And
(37:29):
I think when we show up to just be, I
think it asks ourselves. It asked us to do a
lot of deep listening and deep observation. And just by
watching a culture move, just by watching time changes, I
think we are a lot more in sync with our
own heart and our own life and our own rhythm.
(37:51):
I love traveling because it makes me understand me better.
I love going to those places because there's places ask
me to show up in a different manner. How do
you think we can help people get in touch with that?
You know this because it's your culture, You've brought it
(38:12):
from your childhood into your world here. But how can
we inspire people who are listening, people that want to
travel or don't know how to travel, Like some people
can't go to Long Parong. But I think you need
to be able to apply this principle even when you
go to New Jersey or Disney World or wherever you're
going for a weekend away. Some people can't get onto
(38:35):
a plane and go to Paris or South Africa. So
I want to understand how can we get people to
understand this principle and to take this beautiful principle everywhere.
I think when we are at home, we have our
own rhythms and rituals and ceremonies that we subscribe to
that that's what we do every day. And I think
(38:59):
when we travel, I think it put us in a
place where we are slightly uncomfortable, so that we are
more mindful of the things that we do and not
just doing them because that's our rhythm and a ritual.
So I think traveling so much of it is about
being mindful of your own place in the world, but
also being mindful of what's happening around you. And I
(39:22):
think when you are actually at a place and at
a state of discomfort, you are forced to be more
of a sponge you absorb more. I love the story
that my parents used to tell me about the Buddha
that I think about when I try to live each
day like I'm traveling. The Buddha was walking around how
(39:45):
one day during almsgiving and an old man came up
to him and say, so, what do you and your
months do at the temple that that makes you a Buddhist?
And the Buddhas say, we eat, we sleep, and we walk.
And the old man was so perplex it was like,
(40:05):
I do that too, I do that too. What's the difference?
And the Buddha said, in our tradition, when we eat,
we know that we are eating. When we sleep, we
know that we are sleeping, and when we walk, we
know that we are walking. I think that's what traveling is.
(40:27):
When we are walking through a new road, or when
we try a new dish for the first time, we
are fully there. We know that we are life, and
we are grateful to be breathing. And I think if
we can develop that kind of living, that kind of awakness,
(40:48):
I think we can travel anywhere, even within our own
home and our own neighborhood, and we can see our
neighbors as if we are seeing them for the first
com and perhaps we see all of their home maladies too. Well.
The Dala Lama is going to retire and if someone
(41:11):
needs to take over. Thank you. Thanks for hanging out.
Connect with us on Twitter at Everywhere Pond, Instagram, at
Everywhere podcast, or on the website at everywhere podcast dot com.
(41:32):
Of course, I couldn't have done any of this without
my executive producers, Christopher Hats and the loveliest of lovely
Holly Fry. A big thank you to my lead producer
and editor Chandler Mays, and also co editor and creative
the soundtrack Tristan McNeil. I am your host, Daniel Scheffler,
(41:53):
and as I'd like to say, good boys go to
Heaven and bad Boys Everywhere. For more podcasts from I
Heart Radio, visit the I heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts,
or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
Everywhere News
Host
Daniel Scheffler
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