September 4, 2025 • 29 mins
In this episode of Made For This Mountain, we explore the deep, transformative freedom that comes from letting go of what you can’t control. If you've ever felt overwhelmed by circumstances, people, or outcomes that seem just out of reach, this is for you. Through personal reflections, timeless truths, and practical steps, you'll discover how surrender is not weakness it's wisdom.
Whether you're in a season of chaos, disappointment, or uncertainty, this episode will guide you back to peace and purpose. Learn how to trust the process, embrace the unknown, and move forward with strength you didn’t know you had.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
So I feel like I catch myself saying this really
often like the greatest tool, But this is actually the
greatest tool you will ever master. The greatest thing that
you ever master in your life is the ability to
let go of the things you can't control, like letting
the things that are out of your hand, out of
your perspective, out of your ability to change the mind
or the action or the outcome of it, letting those
(00:20):
things leave, letting them letting them miss out on you,
missing out on it, letting it be what it needs
to be. I think at the reason that so many
people are so miserable, the reason we find ourselves and
such just difficult positions, is because we are trying to
control things that are out of our control, and because
in our brain we think that if we are successful
(00:40):
at it, that we make this thing happen, we're going
to be joyful, that we're gonna be happy, that we're
going to be fruitful. We make ourselves more miserable over
things that we can't control than the things that we can.
The real power lies and realizing that you can do
what you have to do for what you can do,
and not do what you can't do for the things
you will never do. Losing control over things that you
(01:03):
had no control over period, doesn't mean that you lost it.
It means that it was regained to where it was
supposed to be. This is made for this mountain with
Josh Roda or we're turning pain into purpose. So this episode,
it is this mountain of this raality because for a
lot of us we struggle with this. Right, we're letting
go of what you can't control and knowing that some
things in your life are going to be out of
(01:24):
your hands, out of your control, out of your hands.
And this one can come to a lot a lot
of things because a quick example that's difficult to deal
with sometimes loss of family members, right, lots of people
we love and care for, and we can dwell on that.
Like I know for myself, and again I'm very vulnerable
with everyone that listens here because I think the only
way I can ever help anyone and I believe from me,
(01:45):
believe this is new vulnerabilities through our stories and through
the pain that we've conquered, in the pain that we've
turned into purpose and the things that we've made. And
for myself, this is not an easy thing. When my
mother passed I was a tough one. And first of all,
my mother was awesome, and I was like one of
my best friends here and there we had her. Obviously,
where there is no mother son or father's son that
(02:05):
doesn't have some type of conflict at some point, because
we all do. We're argument. But it's very distinctive with
Dominican mothers. I'm Dominican as a guess, how we say,
And I never realized the dichotomy of a Dominican mother
and their son until actually I experienced that with my grandmother.
My mother was the opposite of that. My mother was
very if you are wrong, you were wrong. She's more
(02:27):
of Americanized, I guess, Dominican mother than most. And we
always make this claim that Dominican moms really just adore
their sons, and their sons could do no wrong. I could.
I could like fight a puppy, not that I ever would,
but I could like fight a puppy, and my grandmother
would say, you know what, that puppy deserved it, because
that's the kind of relationship typically that Dominican mothers have
(02:48):
with their kids. My mother, however, my grandmother have that
with that kind of relationship. My mother didn't have that,
and there was this difficulty when she passed because it
was so sudden and so rapid and out of anyone's control,
and not to get into like super details, but it
was during like certain things that were happening in certain
things she was given, and it caused her to have
heart attack and all this stuff, and it was hard
(03:09):
to reconcile, to reconcile this reality where you want to
control the outcome of the situation or what it looks
like or the bigger picture of this thing, because you
think that if there's something you could do, or if
there's an action that you could have taken, or a
conversation that you could have had, or an effort that
you could have given, and then we start playing this
game of what ifs. I believe that this is one
(03:31):
of those powerful moments for me personally because it allowed
me to realize that there's very limited things that I
have control over, Like there's very few things in this
world that I can ever say that I am responsible for.
The One thing that I know that I'm responsible for
is me myself. Right, the things that I do, the
actions that I take, the life that I live, my
son right, I'm responsible for the outcome of his life
(03:52):
and what I do in this perspective, my family right
in general, all that that realities. There are all things
that I can have a sway in hand in, but
I can't control the outcome of everything. I can't control
the things that have happened, the past, the future. I
can't allow those things to have so much authority over
me because I don't have that power. And for a
(04:14):
lot of us, we get so wrapped up in that
because we think that this is who we are. We
think that that's part of our story, and we have
to make this narrative happen. So you're tired because you
think that you have to control every outcome. And we
spend so much time in our lives grippling and grappling
with what can happen or what never happened, and we
(04:35):
were the things that we weren't meant to hold. We
control our feelings and our emotions and our actions based
on these anxieties of what could have happened or or
the things that didn't happen, and we think that we
have to have a manipulation over it. There's a story
that I tell often, especially when we talk about healing
through this right and letting this, let's letting this go,
and sorry about this monk, and three months that we're
(04:57):
worth speaking to the devil don't appear to these monks.
And he comes to the first one and he says
to the first monk, he says, if you could have
any gift, anything you would want, what would you want?
And he responded and he was like, I would ask
that you never committed sin in this big like deep
wanting to change the past, and saying that I would,
(05:18):
I would have stopped you from sinning against God and
falling and falling short and all these things. And then
the other one says in his zeal, he says, I
would stop anyone else in the future, that you don't
hurt any more people, and that you're taking out of
this one and the one. The third one comes up
and he says to him nothing. He begins to pray
and makes a sign of the cross. He says, get
behind me, Satan, and he and the demon squeals and
(05:43):
he runs away, and then the other two brothers ask him, brother,
why did you respond to this? And he says one
of the most profound things ever. He says, we have
no control over the past. What the enemy wanted you
to do in his fake example of giving you something,
of gifting you something, is that he wanted you to
be preoccupied with your past. We have no control over
(06:04):
the future. He wanted you to be so focused on
the future that you created anxiety. The only thing that
we have, the gift that God has given us is
right now, is the present. Is the moment that we're
in is here. And the way we heal of these
things and we let go of these things, is that
we have to realize that the moment that you do
have control over is this one. It's the one that
you are currently in. It's a thing that you're currently living,
(06:25):
it's a process that you're currently going through. It's right now.
There's a very moment that you are in. Is the
moment that you have control over. And when you're trying
to control the outcome of so many other things, you
will never allow yourself to actually be at peace. You
allow yourself to go through this torment of something that
didn't happen, or something that did happen, or something that
might happen, or all these other things, and you create
(06:46):
this desire of control in a place that that's just
an illusion. What you have power over, however, is right now.
You have power over the things you're doing now. The
control is in you for you, not in other things,
in how they respond towards you. Knowing that we can
lose control and then then we can let things go
and that we don't have to bask in what happened
(07:09):
or what didn't happen, it allows us to accept where
we're in now. And we'll dive a little bit deeper
into this after this real quick commercial break. So one
thing that when we talk about control, that seems to
be a push factor for us is how people respond
to us, Like we would stretch ourselves thin and for
people that won't even look our way, we'll stretch ourselves
(07:30):
thin for people that don't care about us, or don't
care about our actions or where we're at in our
life for what we're doing. And the struggle that we
face there is that we really want these people to
love us. We want these people to like us, We
want these people to pick us. So we cause this
hardship in ourselves because we are not able to control
how they perceive us. We're not able to control their
(07:51):
emotions and their actions, and that hurts right, Because if
you think, if you've told yourself that if I give more,
if I try harder, that this means that they'll try
more with me, they'll give more to me, You're trying
to control the narrative of the relationship with that person.
And I need you to understand that not even God himself,
not even God himself, forces people to pick him, forces
(08:14):
people to love him. What makes you think that you
doing more of something that they don't value is gonna
make them finally pick you. The thing that you have
power over, the thing that you do have control over,
might not be what they choose or say or do,
but it is what you allow yourself to be put into.
The difference is between that is that we allow ourselves
not necessarily to give up, but to surrender to the truth.
(08:36):
Because giving up is saying, Okay, I stopped giving effort
where effort was valued and reciprocated and loved and wanted,
and surrendering is the truth. It means that I've surrendered
to what's real in that person's life, and not necessarily
what I wanted, but what is real. This is where
we change this narrative, is we change what we are
trying to control, to just let it be what it is,
(08:56):
letting go of what you can't fix, letting go what
you can't change what you're letting go of, what you
can't force a person to feel or to believe. And
I've seen this so much, where we try to force
people to finally value us, or love us, or keep us.
We try to force our desire in their mind. You
might be the greatest person ever. You might have so
much software, you might have so much value in so
(09:17):
much goodness, and people might see that, even the person
that you're trying to get them to see might even
see that. But it doesn't mean that they have to
reciprocate what you want. Just because you're good doesn't mean
you're good for them, doesn't mean they're good for you.
Doesn't mean that the place that they're in is going
to be good. And this is what hurts. Sometimes we
try to force people to see us and to value us,
not realizing that if they were to give you what
(09:39):
you wanted, it might end up hurting you in the
long run. You might think that this thing is what
you want now, but it's because you've haven't let go
of what it is or what your brain is telling
you except what it really is in your life when
we stretch ourselves thin for people and we try to
control the narrative of those relationships and the narrative of
that outcome. And this is everything right. Yes, romantic, of course,
(10:00):
but like family members and friendships, I've experienced this, and
I feel like every facet, but especially in friendships, I
feel like I've tried to control and to manipulate the
way the relationship would work so that it could be
healthy and beneficial and good and fun. But it's only
come to the point where I'm the only one making
the effort. And I've come to a point in my
life where if the bridge is burning, I'm not going
(10:21):
to be the only one throwing water on it to
keep it alive. Like, I'm not going to sit here
and try to beg people to do their part of
the relationship. And I know things happen. I know we
go through these stages in life. Is crazy and all
these things. I'm not saying that because we're adults. Things
are crazy, but you know, you know when a relationship
is reciprocal, you know when you are the only one
(10:42):
putting in the effort. You know when you're the only
ones showing up. You know, when you're the only one
that's actually making anything happen here, you don't have to
beg anyone to be there. And the hard part for
a lot of us is that we think that this
is just gonna happen, that we're just going to show up.
They're finally going to see the effort, and they're gonna
(11:02):
put their party in. But you're only gonna hurt yourself
trying to do that. Learning to let go of the
things you can't control, especially when it comes to relationships,
is one of the hardest things we ever do, but
it's one of the most fruitful because now you're not
sitting here thinking what are they doing? You're not sitting
here thinking what if You're not sitting here thinking that
one day they might wake up and see this. You're
not creating this narrative or letting this storyline in your
(11:24):
brain survive just because you haven't let go of the
control of this thing. And I'm not trying to be
negative in this reality. I'm trying to be real because
one thing is that this is okay. And without giving
too much right, these are conversations that I've had so
many times, and I can't tell you the amount of
patterns that it's the same thing. Like we've all experiences,
(11:46):
every human. I feel like everyone that's been in the
daily scene or been in relationships or family members that
aren't healthier, everyone that's been in these things. There are
so many relationships that we have tried to control. We've
tried to ultimately hijack it right, to make it what
we want it to be, to make it a weaken envision.
So what we do is that we cause problems in
our own heart, in our own mind. We cause the
cycle of unhealedness to continue because we've created something that
(12:10):
we think we want. We've created again in a good way,
a justifiable way, and understandable that this is what you want,
But it doesn't mean that it's going to be what
you think it's going to be. And it's okay to
let go of what you wanted, to surrender to what's
in front of you. To be real with that, you
have to stop expecting people to do what you would do,
(12:30):
stop thinking that their heart is like yours and that
they love like you, and by all means, don't become cold.
But that doesn't mean that you become dumb, just because
you have allowed yourself to not be cold, to be warm.
But there has to be a parameter with this, a
reality that it's not so much this one sided relationship,
(12:51):
but letting go of the perspective again that we've created
and letting that be what it is surrendering to truth.
It's not quitting, it's surrendering to what's real. Learning to
let go of things allows us to be real with
the relationship and the situation and how we're growing and
what we're not growing in. And I think that we
(13:12):
struggle with this often, to let go of things, because
it's almost like a superhero complex, like we think that
if I show up more, that I can show out more,
that I can save a person or save a thing,
or save a job, or save a career, whatever it
might be, that I can show up in a way
that's gonna make a different And it's hard to mix
(13:33):
these two things right, to sit here and be optimistic
about what's possible and not be cold, but also be
real about that. And this is when discernment comes into play.
Is this thing that I'm envisioning, it's this thing that
I want, Is this thing that I hope for? Genuinely
giving back to me? Is it creating something that allows
(13:55):
me to feel the best version of me to be free?
And this doesn't mean that necessarily has to do something
for I'll use an example of creating content, right the example,
this is what I'm doing at this very moment. I'm
creating something. So is this thing that I'm creating is
it beneficial for me? Is it going to give back
to me? And is it actually something that's mutual? Now, Obviously,
obviously cameras and lighting and microphone and hardware and digital
(14:20):
outside monitors and all these things are not things that
can actively in their own regard give back to me.
But there's something that through my creativity and my work
and effort that it produces something that I would want.
So if this thing is giving to me, it's because
I've given my part. But it's reciprocal. It's still here,
it's still being produced, it's still helping me make something.
(14:41):
Apply that across the board. Let's take into a human relationships,
this friendship that I have with this person, is it beneficial?
Like is it actually good? And I don't mean like
you use them for something. I don't mean like you're
using a person, But I mean like it's beneficial in
the sense that we are both being brought to the
best version of our lives or being sanctified. Are were
being made good? Are we doing the right thing with
(15:03):
this person? Or is it just beneficial for them to
have me around or is it just beneficial for me
to have them around? Right, because sometimes we are the
aggressor or in the storyline, sometimes we're the ones that
are taking from people. So we have to be real
with this reality that is it something that's beneficial? Or
are we good for each other? Like it's not just convenience,
but are we actually good for each other? Is it
(15:25):
actually producing something good? Is it something that's coming out
of this like positive? Is Are there happy moments? Are
there fruitful moments? Are there people around us that are
joyful for it because we are fully this And is
it something that I actually want to invest myself in?
Now this should have been answered in the first discernment point, right,
because if it's beneficial, if you're not the only one begging,
(15:48):
or if you are the only one begging, then you
can see what it looks like. You know that this
thing is not fruitful, or you know that it is truthful,
or you know that one side or you know that's
not one side of you are able to see this.
So what happens when we don't like oh though we
can't look off what we've created in our mind, we
allow ourselves to be put under that right and we
(16:08):
don't see this for what it is, for the value
that it brings. We see it for the things that
we hope it could be. We've married our desire and
our hope and we've ignored our reality. We've created a relationship,
a storyline, a pattern with what we have told our
brain and not what we have seen in our lives.
And that's where things get a little muddled, a little messy,
(16:29):
because you're expecting people to have your heart, You're expecting
people to think like you, You're expecting them to respond
like you. You're expecting them to be like you, and
they're not. And that's the hardest part of this, all
that sometimes the people that we want to be the
most like us people that are nothing like us. And
being able to discern that and just unpack that reality
is going to save so much time, so much heartbreak,
(16:50):
is so much anguish from our lives because this is
what it is the reality of what it is, not
the desired hope of what it could be, but the
reality of what's in front of us. Letting go doesn't
mean failure. It means you learned what you needed to.
And I think that's a big takeaway because we have
times where we think that if I walk away from
this thing, which is again it's called the sunken cost fallacy.
(17:12):
I've mentioned that before in different episodes, but it's called
the sunk cost fallacy. Is that the belief that if
you have already invested time in this thing, if you've
already invested all these years and all this effort and
all this time, that eventually this thing is going to happen.
Why because you've invested so much time, So you don't
want to walk away from the thing that you've invested
years in. And so your thought pattern is, I've already
(17:34):
done this effort, I've already invested, I've already given myself more,
this is bound to happen. And for a lot of people,
they end up in a rut, repeating cycles and repeating
things because they think I've already invested here, so I
got to stay here. Sometimes it's okay to cut your losses.
Sometimes it's okay just to take the lesson you learn
and learn to let go of the things you can control.
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Letting go of that thought and that hope and this
thing would have happened, and it's going to be one
of the greatest things you ever do. You won't leave
yourself in a rut because you spend time digging it.
You won't continue to feel like you're not good or useful,
that you're useless because you've allowed someone that didn't see
value in you to continue to devalue you. You won't
put yourself into place that will continue to hold on
(18:17):
to things just because you refuse to let go of
the things you can't control. And we won't continue to
make ourselves the worst version of us just to fit
in a place that we don't belong because we've made
ourselves small. It's hard to realize this because sometimes we
think it's failure. We think that we failed and we
gave up. But you didn't fail. You learned, you grew,
You notice something, you learn patterns that you don't go
(18:39):
back to. You let go of the things that were
out of your control. The season for a lot of us,
and I don't say this again, I don't know you personally,
you learn are listening or watching or wherever you are.
I don't know what your life is like. I don't
know the seasons you're in. I don't know the struggles
you're going through. I don't know the outcome of those things.
But I do know that that a season in which
(19:01):
you do not grow and is a season that you
died in If the thing that you're in right now
is not things that are giving you progress, or you're
not becoming better, even if that better is just stepping
away from something, just growing into something else, even if
it's that minute and quote unquote small, even that is
a season of birth of something changing in you, becoming
(19:23):
better in you that you allowed yourself to grow in
and through. And it doesn't give authority to those things,
right those people, whatever, It doesn't give that power. It
allows you to relinquish that because you've allowed yourself to
move away from you. The only things that have power
over us are the things that we've given authority to.
And we'll talk a little bit more after these last
(19:44):
few commercials. So coming back to that reality that we
are creating the struggle of letting things go in our
lives and the thought process that us letting it go
means that we've lost story, that we failed. It's not
going to help you ever in anything positive. Why Because
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you are diminishing the reality of what you deserve, diminishing
the reality of what you bring to the table. You're
diminishing the reality of the things that you can give
an effort to make those things remain. That's not our
job to force things to be around, like, it's not
our job to force people to see what we bring
to the table or the value we have. The reality
is that for a lot of us, we're hurting ourselves
(20:27):
because we're holding on way harder than we need to, Like,
we're holding onto things longer than it is meant to stay.
We're holding onto people into two careers, into locations in
our lives that are not meant to be there. So
they're not serving you. It's either they're fruitful or they're frustrating.
If the thing in your life is not producing fruit.
And what I mean by fruit is that it's not
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producing something good, it's not producing something of substance. It's
only making you more frustrated. And I don't want to
confuse frustration with work, because work is necessarily good and
is actually sanctifying. It's great for your life. You needed
to produce fruit. You can't produce fruit with that work.
Frustration means that it's not beneficial, it's hurting, and it's
not serving any purpose in my life. Sometimes we confuse
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frustration with work because we think that frustration means that
I'm challenging. Video games have ruined this for us right
where we see more enemies. Sometimes we think that that's
the right path, and it's not. Just because it's a
more difficult path does not mean that it's a more
fruitful path, and we're causing frustration in our lives and
I realizing that those things don't belong in our lives.
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Just because you're trying harder doesn't mean that this thing
is going to see you for what you are, doesn't
mean that you're going to grow into what you need
to be in that place. You're not meant to be frustrated.
You're meant to be fruitful. And fruitful requires work, and
it's part of your life that you're growing in. It's
gonna require work, it's gonna require effort, but you can
discern if it's fruitful. So whether it's people or timelines
(21:55):
or your life whatever that looks like. Because we're gripping
harder to it doesn't mean that it means more. And
this happens a lot with what we perceive our life
should look like. Like we will create certain goals that
while I am absolutely four goals, I'm absolutely for discerning
and desiring and praying and waiting and creating and all
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these I'm all for those things and goals. But the
problem happens when we marry certain goals that do not
have actual benefit in our lives. So let's take example
that or it might hurt to hear, I mean it
hurts all of us because the one desire that all
humans have is to love and to be loved, Like
that's one of our main desires. That's how we're made
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for love, by love to love, right, and we're made
in that reality. But one thing that a lot of
people have made God over their lives is things like
like the vocation of marriage. Right. People think that the
marriage itself is marriage is good, it's holy, and it's
beautiful and it's purposeful. But some people have created a
timeline with that thing that it's so high on the
(22:58):
pedestal that they hurt themselves the moment they don't get it.
So if you don't fit the schedule that you've created
in your life, you begin to think that you're behind
because you're holding too tightly to the things you can't control,
so you diminish this reality. Now, got to be clear,
there are times where we are the enemy in our story.
We're the antagonists in this story right because we are
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not creating space for those things to exist. We are
vindicating the past of our mistakes and giving that too
much credit. So I don't want to say that you
have no role in that, because sometimes you do. Sometimes
you are the problem that you need to adjust certain things.
And there are a lot of times that we have
created a pedestal for this thing, that that thing is
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our defining moment, and everything else around our lives becomes
way more miserable or way less enjoyable because it's not
within the timeline or the constraints that you've given your life.
Because you haven't seen this happen yet. You've created that
into the pinnacle of everything. And you think that the
moment when which I gave the last episodes called the
wind fallacy, when this thing happens, you think that this
(24:01):
is when your life is going to make sense, and
it's not. You can't depict a timeline in the world
that is time. Do you have a limit here? And
these things are beautiful, they are hopeful, and then you
should hope that that's in your heart to have this
and it should be something that you do have a
goal and a dream, but it is not something that
you confine your life too. If you have confined your
(24:23):
life to something that might never happen, you are never
going to live life. You're going to stay in a
place of pain and just agony because you think that
your life has to follow this timeline when that hits. Unfortunately,
we've tried to control the outcome of our lives so
deeply that we don't allow our lives to actually live.
(24:44):
We don't allow ourselves to be fruitful and purposeful in
the now because we've tied it to the wind. And
if you keep tying it to the wind, you will
continue to stay here and not there. You will never
get to that point because that point keeps moving, that
that pedestal was so big that you can't even reach
that thing. The reason that we struggle to let go
(25:06):
of things is because we've married the idea and not
the reality. And when you start letting go of what
you can't control, it's actually the most powerful thing you'll
ever do. Like learning to let go of things gives
you so much authority because you don't dwell on the mistakes,
you don't dwell in the past, you don't dwell and
will hurt you. You don't dwell on those things because
(25:27):
those things don't have the power. And I know the
sounds like it's redundant. I know, sounds like you said
it so many times people they've spoken about this, but
there's this reality that if things happen, you let them happen.
There's phrase that people hear it so often, it is
what it is. And I remember I heard that in
high school or a friend of mine. He was just like,
(25:48):
you know what it is? What it is? And I
feel like, of course, it's like probably like the sixties
or something way older than us. But it just sat
with me. It resonated with me because that was a
good response to a lot of things that I had
no control over, Like things happen. People will reject to me,
it is what it is. People hurt me, they walked
away from me, it is what it is. People don't
want me in their lives, and I've tried, and I
(26:08):
made the effort, and they still don't want it. It is
what it is. It is what it is because the
end of the day, I've done what I can do.
At the end of the day, I've made my effort,
I've shown up. I've tried, and I can't control how
people perceive me or what they say to me, and
I can't control their response to my actions. I can't
control what they want or what they desire. But I
can't control what I do next. I can control the
relationships that I have. I can control how I respond
(26:31):
to those people. I can control what I do. That's
all that I can really care about. So in this life,
in this season that you're in, whatever the season that
looks in, letting go of what you can't control will
allow you to give your time and effort to the
things you can the things that actually are serving you
in purposeful and good. If you keep trying to control
(26:53):
too many things, you'll never control the things that are fruitful.
That other saying we're full of sayings today, what is it?
The A jack of all trades is a master of
none right that you can do all these things, but
you become no master of anything, don't become good at
anything else because you've tried to control the outcome of
so many things. Life is way too beautiful and way
(27:14):
too short for us to spend so much time dwelling
and just staying in the things that we couldn't fix
or change, staying in the people that we couldn't fix
or change, staying in the careers that we couldn't fix
or change. The relationships to family members, It's not your
job to change them. It is your job to love
them and to love you and to not continue to
stay there. So as we wrap this mountain of them
(27:37):
just to stall. And I've been thinking about this myself
and how to leave just ways where we can be
just challenged. I guess as we go through our day
or a week or wherever you're listening to this or
whatever point, or maybe just stumbled upon this, and you're
just like, oh, let me hear this episode for once,
and you got to the end of it. Good for you,
Like you are persistent, and I'm really grateful for you,
(28:01):
am proud of you forgetting this far. But this is
reality that if you were able to look at things
from a perspective whatever it is today, whatever argument you have,
whatever difficulty you have, whatever thought, whatever relationship you're in,
to step back and look at it from the perspective
of letting go of what you can't control, like looking
at that thing and saying, what in this is in
my control and what is it and learning to reciprocate that,
(28:24):
to respond to that accordingly, to know that if it's
in your control, that you can do something, and if
it's not in your control, then you can't do anything,
and all you could do, all you will do to
yourself is cause more torment and problems. And seeing that
through that lens, through the scope of what can you control,
what can't you control, and what's just best to let go.
(28:45):
So thank you again just for being here, for your presence,
for listening to this episode, and I genuinely hope that
there's something fruitful and purposeful in these and that the
people that need to find and find them. So I
hope you're sharing these, I hope you're sending these to
people and you feel like my something out of it.
If not cool, I'm just glad you're here. I thank
you for listening this episode, and we'll catch you in
the next one.
So I feel like I catch myself saying this really
often like the greatest tool, But this is actually the
greatest tool you will ever master. The greatest thing that
you ever master in your life is the ability to
let go of the things you can't control, like letting
the things that are out of your hand, out of
your perspective, out of your ability to change the mind
or the action or the outcome of it, letting those
(00:20):
things leave, letting them letting them miss out on you,
missing out on it, letting it be what it needs
to be. I think at the reason that so many
people are so miserable, the reason we find ourselves and
such just difficult positions, is because we are trying to
control things that are out of our control, and because
in our brain we think that if we are successful
(00:40):
at it, that we make this thing happen, we're going
to be joyful, that we're gonna be happy, that we're
going to be fruitful. We make ourselves more miserable over
things that we can't control than the things that we can.
The real power lies and realizing that you can do
what you have to do for what you can do,
and not do what you can't do for the things
you will never do. Losing control over things that you
(01:03):
had no control over period, doesn't mean that you lost it.
It means that it was regained to where it was
supposed to be. This is made for this mountain with
Josh Roda or we're turning pain into purpose. So this episode,
it is this mountain of this raality because for a
lot of us we struggle with this. Right, we're letting
go of what you can't control and knowing that some
things in your life are going to be out of
(01:24):
your hands, out of your control, out of your hands.
And this one can come to a lot a lot
of things because a quick example that's difficult to deal
with sometimes loss of family members, right, lots of people
we love and care for, and we can dwell on that.
Like I know for myself, and again I'm very vulnerable
with everyone that listens here because I think the only
way I can ever help anyone and I believe from me,
(01:45):
believe this is new vulnerabilities through our stories and through
the pain that we've conquered, in the pain that we've
turned into purpose and the things that we've made. And
for myself, this is not an easy thing. When my
mother passed I was a tough one. And first of all,
my mother was awesome, and I was like one of
my best friends here and there we had her. Obviously,
where there is no mother son or father's son that
(02:05):
doesn't have some type of conflict at some point, because
we all do. We're argument. But it's very distinctive with
Dominican mothers. I'm Dominican as a guess, how we say,
And I never realized the dichotomy of a Dominican mother
and their son until actually I experienced that with my grandmother.
My mother was the opposite of that. My mother was
very if you are wrong, you were wrong. She's more
(02:27):
of Americanized, I guess, Dominican mother than most. And we
always make this claim that Dominican moms really just adore
their sons, and their sons could do no wrong. I could.
I could like fight a puppy, not that I ever would,
but I could like fight a puppy, and my grandmother
would say, you know what, that puppy deserved it, because
that's the kind of relationship typically that Dominican mothers have
(02:48):
with their kids. My mother, however, my grandmother have that
with that kind of relationship. My mother didn't have that,
and there was this difficulty when she passed because it
was so sudden and so rapid and out of anyone's control,
and not to get into like super details, but it
was during like certain things that were happening in certain
things she was given, and it caused her to have
heart attack and all this stuff, and it was hard
(03:09):
to reconcile, to reconcile this reality where you want to
control the outcome of the situation or what it looks
like or the bigger picture of this thing, because you
think that if there's something you could do, or if
there's an action that you could have taken, or a
conversation that you could have had, or an effort that
you could have given, and then we start playing this
game of what ifs. I believe that this is one
(03:31):
of those powerful moments for me personally because it allowed
me to realize that there's very limited things that I
have control over, Like there's very few things in this
world that I can ever say that I am responsible for.
The One thing that I know that I'm responsible for
is me myself. Right, the things that I do, the
actions that I take, the life that I live, my
son right, I'm responsible for the outcome of his life
(03:52):
and what I do in this perspective, my family right
in general, all that that realities. There are all things
that I can have a sway in hand in, but
I can't control the outcome of everything. I can't control
the things that have happened, the past, the future. I
can't allow those things to have so much authority over
me because I don't have that power. And for a
(04:14):
lot of us, we get so wrapped up in that
because we think that this is who we are. We
think that that's part of our story, and we have
to make this narrative happen. So you're tired because you
think that you have to control every outcome. And we
spend so much time in our lives grippling and grappling
with what can happen or what never happened, and we
(04:35):
were the things that we weren't meant to hold. We
control our feelings and our emotions and our actions based
on these anxieties of what could have happened or or
the things that didn't happen, and we think that we
have to have a manipulation over it. There's a story
that I tell often, especially when we talk about healing
through this right and letting this, let's letting this go,
and sorry about this monk, and three months that we're
(04:57):
worth speaking to the devil don't appear to these monks.
And he comes to the first one and he says
to the first monk, he says, if you could have
any gift, anything you would want, what would you want?
And he responded and he was like, I would ask
that you never committed sin in this big like deep
wanting to change the past, and saying that I would,
(05:18):
I would have stopped you from sinning against God and
falling and falling short and all these things. And then
the other one says in his zeal, he says, I
would stop anyone else in the future, that you don't
hurt any more people, and that you're taking out of
this one and the one. The third one comes up
and he says to him nothing. He begins to pray
and makes a sign of the cross. He says, get
behind me, Satan, and he and the demon squeals and
(05:43):
he runs away, and then the other two brothers ask him, brother,
why did you respond to this? And he says one
of the most profound things ever. He says, we have
no control over the past. What the enemy wanted you
to do in his fake example of giving you something,
of gifting you something, is that he wanted you to
be preoccupied with your past. We have no control over
(06:04):
the future. He wanted you to be so focused on
the future that you created anxiety. The only thing that
we have, the gift that God has given us is
right now, is the present. Is the moment that we're
in is here. And the way we heal of these
things and we let go of these things, is that
we have to realize that the moment that you do
have control over is this one. It's the one that
you are currently in. It's a thing that you're currently living,
(06:25):
it's a process that you're currently going through. It's right now.
There's a very moment that you are in. Is the
moment that you have control over. And when you're trying
to control the outcome of so many other things, you
will never allow yourself to actually be at peace. You
allow yourself to go through this torment of something that
didn't happen, or something that did happen, or something that
might happen, or all these other things, and you create
(06:46):
this desire of control in a place that that's just
an illusion. What you have power over, however, is right now.
You have power over the things you're doing now. The
control is in you for you, not in other things,
in how they respond towards you. Knowing that we can
lose control and then then we can let things go
and that we don't have to bask in what happened
(07:09):
or what didn't happen, it allows us to accept where
we're in now. And we'll dive a little bit deeper
into this after this real quick commercial break. So one
thing that when we talk about control, that seems to
be a push factor for us is how people respond
to us, Like we would stretch ourselves thin and for
people that won't even look our way, we'll stretch ourselves
(07:30):
thin for people that don't care about us, or don't
care about our actions or where we're at in our
life for what we're doing. And the struggle that we
face there is that we really want these people to
love us. We want these people to like us, We
want these people to pick us. So we cause this
hardship in ourselves because we are not able to control
how they perceive us. We're not able to control their
(07:51):
emotions and their actions, and that hurts right, Because if
you think, if you've told yourself that if I give more,
if I try harder, that this means that they'll try
more with me, they'll give more to me, You're trying
to control the narrative of the relationship with that person.
And I need you to understand that not even God himself,
not even God himself, forces people to pick him, forces
(08:14):
people to love him. What makes you think that you
doing more of something that they don't value is gonna
make them finally pick you. The thing that you have
power over, the thing that you do have control over,
might not be what they choose or say or do,
but it is what you allow yourself to be put into.
The difference is between that is that we allow ourselves
not necessarily to give up, but to surrender to the truth.
(08:36):
Because giving up is saying, Okay, I stopped giving effort
where effort was valued and reciprocated and loved and wanted,
and surrendering is the truth. It means that I've surrendered
to what's real in that person's life, and not necessarily
what I wanted, but what is real. This is where
we change this narrative, is we change what we are
trying to control, to just let it be what it is,
(08:56):
letting go of what you can't fix, letting go what
you can't change what you're letting go of, what you
can't force a person to feel or to believe. And
I've seen this so much, where we try to force
people to finally value us, or love us, or keep us.
We try to force our desire in their mind. You
might be the greatest person ever. You might have so
much software, you might have so much value in so
(09:17):
much goodness, and people might see that, even the person
that you're trying to get them to see might even
see that. But it doesn't mean that they have to
reciprocate what you want. Just because you're good doesn't mean
you're good for them, doesn't mean they're good for you.
Doesn't mean that the place that they're in is going
to be good. And this is what hurts. Sometimes we
try to force people to see us and to value us,
not realizing that if they were to give you what
(09:39):
you wanted, it might end up hurting you in the
long run. You might think that this thing is what
you want now, but it's because you've haven't let go
of what it is or what your brain is telling
you except what it really is in your life when
we stretch ourselves thin for people and we try to
control the narrative of those relationships and the narrative of
that outcome. And this is everything right. Yes, romantic, of course,
(10:00):
but like family members and friendships, I've experienced this, and
I feel like every facet, but especially in friendships, I
feel like I've tried to control and to manipulate the
way the relationship would work so that it could be
healthy and beneficial and good and fun. But it's only
come to the point where I'm the only one making
the effort. And I've come to a point in my
life where if the bridge is burning, I'm not going
(10:21):
to be the only one throwing water on it to
keep it alive. Like, I'm not going to sit here
and try to beg people to do their part of
the relationship. And I know things happen. I know we
go through these stages in life. Is crazy and all
these things. I'm not saying that because we're adults. Things
are crazy, but you know, you know when a relationship
is reciprocal, you know when you are the only one
(10:42):
putting in the effort. You know when you're the only
ones showing up. You know, when you're the only one
that's actually making anything happen here, you don't have to
beg anyone to be there. And the hard part for
a lot of us is that we think that this
is just gonna happen, that we're just going to show up.
They're finally going to see the effort, and they're gonna
(11:02):
put their party in. But you're only gonna hurt yourself
trying to do that. Learning to let go of the
things you can't control, especially when it comes to relationships,
is one of the hardest things we ever do, but
it's one of the most fruitful because now you're not
sitting here thinking what are they doing? You're not sitting
here thinking what if You're not sitting here thinking that
one day they might wake up and see this. You're
not creating this narrative or letting this storyline in your
(11:24):
brain survive just because you haven't let go of the
control of this thing. And I'm not trying to be
negative in this reality. I'm trying to be real because
one thing is that this is okay. And without giving
too much right, these are conversations that I've had so
many times, and I can't tell you the amount of
patterns that it's the same thing. Like we've all experiences,
(11:46):
every human. I feel like everyone that's been in the
daily scene or been in relationships or family members that
aren't healthier, everyone that's been in these things. There are
so many relationships that we have tried to control. We've
tried to ultimately hijack it right, to make it what
we want it to be, to make it a weaken envision.
So what we do is that we cause problems in
our own heart, in our own mind. We cause the
cycle of unhealedness to continue because we've created something that
(12:10):
we think we want. We've created again in a good way,
a justifiable way, and understandable that this is what you want,
But it doesn't mean that it's going to be what
you think it's going to be. And it's okay to
let go of what you wanted, to surrender to what's
in front of you. To be real with that, you
have to stop expecting people to do what you would do,
(12:30):
stop thinking that their heart is like yours and that
they love like you, and by all means, don't become cold.
But that doesn't mean that you become dumb, just because
you have allowed yourself to not be cold, to be warm.
But there has to be a parameter with this, a
reality that it's not so much this one sided relationship,
(12:51):
but letting go of the perspective again that we've created
and letting that be what it is surrendering to truth.
It's not quitting, it's surrendering to what's real. Learning to
let go of things allows us to be real with
the relationship and the situation and how we're growing and
what we're not growing in. And I think that we
(13:12):
struggle with this often, to let go of things, because
it's almost like a superhero complex, like we think that
if I show up more, that I can show out more,
that I can save a person or save a thing,
or save a job, or save a career, whatever it
might be, that I can show up in a way
that's gonna make a different And it's hard to mix
(13:33):
these two things right, to sit here and be optimistic
about what's possible and not be cold, but also be
real about that. And this is when discernment comes into play.
Is this thing that I'm envisioning, it's this thing that
I want, Is this thing that I hope for? Genuinely
giving back to me? Is it creating something that allows
(13:55):
me to feel the best version of me to be free?
And this doesn't mean that necessarily has to do something
for I'll use an example of creating content, right the example,
this is what I'm doing at this very moment. I'm
creating something. So is this thing that I'm creating is
it beneficial for me? Is it going to give back
to me? And is it actually something that's mutual? Now, Obviously,
obviously cameras and lighting and microphone and hardware and digital
(14:20):
outside monitors and all these things are not things that
can actively in their own regard give back to me.
But there's something that through my creativity and my work
and effort that it produces something that I would want.
So if this thing is giving to me, it's because
I've given my part. But it's reciprocal. It's still here,
it's still being produced, it's still helping me make something.
(14:41):
Apply that across the board. Let's take into a human relationships,
this friendship that I have with this person, is it beneficial?
Like is it actually good? And I don't mean like
you use them for something. I don't mean like you're
using a person, But I mean like it's beneficial in
the sense that we are both being brought to the
best version of our lives or being sanctified. Are were
being made good? Are we doing the right thing with
(15:03):
this person? Or is it just beneficial for them to
have me around or is it just beneficial for me
to have them around? Right, because sometimes we are the
aggressor or in the storyline, sometimes we're the ones that
are taking from people. So we have to be real
with this reality that is it something that's beneficial? Or
are we good for each other? Like it's not just convenience,
but are we actually good for each other? Is it
(15:25):
actually producing something good? Is it something that's coming out
of this like positive? Is Are there happy moments? Are
there fruitful moments? Are there people around us that are
joyful for it because we are fully this And is
it something that I actually want to invest myself in?
Now this should have been answered in the first discernment point, right,
because if it's beneficial, if you're not the only one begging,
(15:48):
or if you are the only one begging, then you
can see what it looks like. You know that this
thing is not fruitful, or you know that it is truthful,
or you know that one side or you know that's
not one side of you are able to see this.
So what happens when we don't like oh though we
can't look off what we've created in our mind, we
allow ourselves to be put under that right and we
(16:08):
don't see this for what it is, for the value
that it brings. We see it for the things that
we hope it could be. We've married our desire and
our hope and we've ignored our reality. We've created a relationship,
a storyline, a pattern with what we have told our
brain and not what we have seen in our lives.
And that's where things get a little muddled, a little messy,
(16:29):
because you're expecting people to have your heart, You're expecting
people to think like you, You're expecting them to respond
like you. You're expecting them to be like you, and
they're not. And that's the hardest part of this, all
that sometimes the people that we want to be the
most like us people that are nothing like us. And
being able to discern that and just unpack that reality
is going to save so much time, so much heartbreak,
(16:50):
is so much anguish from our lives because this is
what it is the reality of what it is, not
the desired hope of what it could be, but the
reality of what's in front of us. Letting go doesn't
mean failure. It means you learned what you needed to.
And I think that's a big takeaway because we have
times where we think that if I walk away from
this thing, which is again it's called the sunken cost fallacy.
(17:12):
I've mentioned that before in different episodes, but it's called
the sunk cost fallacy. Is that the belief that if
you have already invested time in this thing, if you've
already invested all these years and all this effort and
all this time, that eventually this thing is going to happen.
Why because you've invested so much time, So you don't
want to walk away from the thing that you've invested
years in. And so your thought pattern is, I've already
(17:34):
done this effort, I've already invested, I've already given myself more,
this is bound to happen. And for a lot of people,
they end up in a rut, repeating cycles and repeating
things because they think I've already invested here, so I
got to stay here. Sometimes it's okay to cut your losses.
Sometimes it's okay just to take the lesson you learn
and learn to let go of the things you can control.
(17:55):
Letting go of that thought and that hope and this
thing would have happened, and it's going to be one
of the greatest things you ever do. You won't leave
yourself in a rut because you spend time digging it.
You won't continue to feel like you're not good or useful,
that you're useless because you've allowed someone that didn't see
value in you to continue to devalue you. You won't
put yourself into place that will continue to hold on
(18:17):
to things just because you refuse to let go of
the things you can't control. And we won't continue to
make ourselves the worst version of us just to fit
in a place that we don't belong because we've made
ourselves small. It's hard to realize this because sometimes we
think it's failure. We think that we failed and we
gave up. But you didn't fail. You learned, you grew,
You notice something, you learn patterns that you don't go
(18:39):
back to. You let go of the things that were
out of your control. The season for a lot of us,
and I don't say this again, I don't know you personally,
you learn are listening or watching or wherever you are.
I don't know what your life is like. I don't
know the seasons you're in. I don't know the struggles
you're going through. I don't know the outcome of those things.
But I do know that that a season in which
(19:01):
you do not grow and is a season that you
died in If the thing that you're in right now
is not things that are giving you progress, or you're
not becoming better, even if that better is just stepping
away from something, just growing into something else, even if
it's that minute and quote unquote small, even that is
a season of birth of something changing in you, becoming
(19:23):
better in you that you allowed yourself to grow in
and through. And it doesn't give authority to those things,
right those people, whatever, It doesn't give that power. It
allows you to relinquish that because you've allowed yourself to
move away from you. The only things that have power
over us are the things that we've given authority to.
And we'll talk a little bit more after these last
(19:44):
few commercials. So coming back to that reality that we
are creating the struggle of letting things go in our
lives and the thought process that us letting it go
means that we've lost story, that we failed. It's not
going to help you ever in anything positive. Why Because
(20:06):
you are diminishing the reality of what you deserve, diminishing
the reality of what you bring to the table. You're
diminishing the reality of the things that you can give
an effort to make those things remain. That's not our
job to force things to be around, like, it's not
our job to force people to see what we bring
to the table or the value we have. The reality
is that for a lot of us, we're hurting ourselves
(20:27):
because we're holding on way harder than we need to, Like,
we're holding onto things longer than it is meant to stay.
We're holding onto people into two careers, into locations in
our lives that are not meant to be there. So
they're not serving you. It's either they're fruitful or they're frustrating.
If the thing in your life is not producing fruit.
And what I mean by fruit is that it's not
(20:48):
producing something good, it's not producing something of substance. It's
only making you more frustrated. And I don't want to
confuse frustration with work, because work is necessarily good and
is actually sanctifying. It's great for your life. You needed
to produce fruit. You can't produce fruit with that work.
Frustration means that it's not beneficial, it's hurting, and it's
not serving any purpose in my life. Sometimes we confuse
(21:10):
frustration with work because we think that frustration means that
I'm challenging. Video games have ruined this for us right
where we see more enemies. Sometimes we think that that's
the right path, and it's not. Just because it's a
more difficult path does not mean that it's a more
fruitful path, and we're causing frustration in our lives and
I realizing that those things don't belong in our lives.
(21:32):
Just because you're trying harder doesn't mean that this thing
is going to see you for what you are, doesn't
mean that you're going to grow into what you need
to be in that place. You're not meant to be frustrated.
You're meant to be fruitful. And fruitful requires work, and
it's part of your life that you're growing in. It's
gonna require work, it's gonna require effort, but you can
discern if it's fruitful. So whether it's people or timelines
(21:55):
or your life whatever that looks like. Because we're gripping
harder to it doesn't mean that it means more. And
this happens a lot with what we perceive our life
should look like. Like we will create certain goals that
while I am absolutely four goals, I'm absolutely for discerning
and desiring and praying and waiting and creating and all
(22:16):
these I'm all for those things and goals. But the
problem happens when we marry certain goals that do not
have actual benefit in our lives. So let's take example
that or it might hurt to hear, I mean it
hurts all of us because the one desire that all
humans have is to love and to be loved, Like
that's one of our main desires. That's how we're made
(22:38):
for love, by love to love, right, and we're made
in that reality. But one thing that a lot of
people have made God over their lives is things like
like the vocation of marriage. Right. People think that the
marriage itself is marriage is good, it's holy, and it's
beautiful and it's purposeful. But some people have created a
timeline with that thing that it's so high on the
(22:58):
pedestal that they hurt themselves the moment they don't get it.
So if you don't fit the schedule that you've created
in your life, you begin to think that you're behind
because you're holding too tightly to the things you can't control,
so you diminish this reality. Now, got to be clear,
there are times where we are the enemy in our story.
We're the antagonists in this story right because we are
(23:18):
not creating space for those things to exist. We are
vindicating the past of our mistakes and giving that too
much credit. So I don't want to say that you
have no role in that, because sometimes you do. Sometimes
you are the problem that you need to adjust certain things.
And there are a lot of times that we have
created a pedestal for this thing, that that thing is
(23:39):
our defining moment, and everything else around our lives becomes
way more miserable or way less enjoyable because it's not
within the timeline or the constraints that you've given your life.
Because you haven't seen this happen yet. You've created that
into the pinnacle of everything. And you think that the
moment when which I gave the last episodes called the
wind fallacy, when this thing happens, you think that this
(24:01):
is when your life is going to make sense, and
it's not. You can't depict a timeline in the world
that is time. Do you have a limit here? And
these things are beautiful, they are hopeful, and then you
should hope that that's in your heart to have this
and it should be something that you do have a
goal and a dream, but it is not something that
you confine your life too. If you have confined your
(24:23):
life to something that might never happen, you are never
going to live life. You're going to stay in a
place of pain and just agony because you think that
your life has to follow this timeline when that hits. Unfortunately,
we've tried to control the outcome of our lives so
deeply that we don't allow our lives to actually live.
(24:44):
We don't allow ourselves to be fruitful and purposeful in
the now because we've tied it to the wind. And
if you keep tying it to the wind, you will
continue to stay here and not there. You will never
get to that point because that point keeps moving, that
that pedestal was so big that you can't even reach
that thing. The reason that we struggle to let go
(25:06):
of things is because we've married the idea and not
the reality. And when you start letting go of what
you can't control, it's actually the most powerful thing you'll
ever do. Like learning to let go of things gives
you so much authority because you don't dwell on the mistakes,
you don't dwell in the past, you don't dwell and
will hurt you. You don't dwell on those things because
(25:27):
those things don't have the power. And I know the
sounds like it's redundant. I know, sounds like you said
it so many times people they've spoken about this, but
there's this reality that if things happen, you let them happen.
There's phrase that people hear it so often, it is
what it is. And I remember I heard that in
high school or a friend of mine. He was just like,
(25:48):
you know what it is? What it is? And I
feel like, of course, it's like probably like the sixties
or something way older than us. But it just sat
with me. It resonated with me because that was a
good response to a lot of things that I had
no control over, Like things happen. People will reject to me,
it is what it is. People hurt me, they walked
away from me, it is what it is. People don't
want me in their lives, and I've tried, and I
(26:08):
made the effort, and they still don't want it. It is
what it is. It is what it is because the
end of the day, I've done what I can do.
At the end of the day, I've made my effort,
I've shown up. I've tried, and I can't control how
people perceive me or what they say to me, and
I can't control their response to my actions. I can't
control what they want or what they desire. But I
can't control what I do next. I can control the
relationships that I have. I can control how I respond
(26:31):
to those people. I can control what I do. That's
all that I can really care about. So in this life,
in this season that you're in, whatever the season that
looks in, letting go of what you can't control will
allow you to give your time and effort to the
things you can the things that actually are serving you
in purposeful and good. If you keep trying to control
(26:53):
too many things, you'll never control the things that are fruitful.
That other saying we're full of sayings today, what is it?
The A jack of all trades is a master of
none right that you can do all these things, but
you become no master of anything, don't become good at
anything else because you've tried to control the outcome of
so many things. Life is way too beautiful and way
(27:14):
too short for us to spend so much time dwelling
and just staying in the things that we couldn't fix
or change, staying in the people that we couldn't fix
or change, staying in the careers that we couldn't fix
or change. The relationships to family members, It's not your
job to change them. It is your job to love
them and to love you and to not continue to
stay there. So as we wrap this mountain of them
(27:37):
just to stall. And I've been thinking about this myself
and how to leave just ways where we can be
just challenged. I guess as we go through our day
or a week or wherever you're listening to this or
whatever point, or maybe just stumbled upon this, and you're
just like, oh, let me hear this episode for once,
and you got to the end of it. Good for you,
Like you are persistent, and I'm really grateful for you,
(28:01):
am proud of you forgetting this far. But this is
reality that if you were able to look at things
from a perspective whatever it is today, whatever argument you have,
whatever difficulty you have, whatever thought, whatever relationship you're in,
to step back and look at it from the perspective
of letting go of what you can't control, like looking
at that thing and saying, what in this is in
my control and what is it and learning to reciprocate that,
(28:24):
to respond to that accordingly, to know that if it's
in your control, that you can do something, and if
it's not in your control, then you can't do anything,
and all you could do, all you will do to
yourself is cause more torment and problems. And seeing that
through that lens, through the scope of what can you control,
what can't you control, and what's just best to let go.
(28:45):
So thank you again just for being here, for your presence,
for listening to this episode, and I genuinely hope that
there's something fruitful and purposeful in these and that the
people that need to find and find them. So I
hope you're sharing these, I hope you're sending these to
people and you feel like my something out of it.
If not cool, I'm just glad you're here. I thank
you for listening this episode, and we'll catch you in
the next one.
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