October 4, 2021 • 14 mins
Maria del Carmen, an orphan raised by nuns, leaves the convent and heads to Miami to fulfill her dream of exploring the world.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
The Princess of South Beach is available in English and
in Spanish. This is the English episode Espanol Regresfidol, I
Heart Radio's My Cultura Network and Sonoro present Princess of
South Beach. Oh leap alone. I don't want to talk
(00:41):
to you tomorrow. When TMC and all all the other
trashy magazines talk about what happened, they'll all say the
(01:04):
same thing that, just one month before her wedding, Miami
socialite Gloria Calderon dramatically ran down the pier, jumped into
her brand new speedboat, and crashed into an unfortunately placed
sea boulder, Yes a sea boulder. Anyway, they'll say that
(01:24):
she miraculously survived without a scratch on her body. But
they'll all be wrong. The magazine's Gloria's boyfriend, her own mother,
because even though everyone saw Gloria swim to shore that night,
Gloria is dead. How do I know? Because I am Gloria. Duh.
(01:49):
But I'm getting ahead of myself. Started with the accident
instead of the beginning. As you've noticed, I have a
flair for the dramatic. It's kind of my thing. So
this story actually begins with an orphan girl named Maria
del Carmen. What the cliche? This is a novella. Of
(02:13):
course there's going to be a poor, innocent orphan raised
in a convent Helloa. See her Mana Claudia. I'm here,
Mariam ha stopped cleaning. You're going to miss your buzz.
I'll help you with your bags. But in Mana Claudia,
according to the tour board, it's my day to do
(02:33):
the floors. Let her Mana Susanna do that. That woman
hasn't lifted a finger since ninety six. No, Nona Susanna, Maria,
are you sure you want to leave? It's not too
late to change your mind. We could always use another
(02:54):
nun here at the convent of Yes, we've been through
this like a million times. I don't want to become
a nun. I want to be a normal person. Not
that nuns aren't normal people, but you know what I mean.
I just want to like pay taxes and complain about
(03:15):
traffic and oh to try a sinnabon. But obviously I'm
super grateful that you, you know, raised me and fed me,
saved my life, you know me. Please, there's no need
to thank me. I loved raising you. As my own,
all of it, even the dirty diapers. Well maybe not
(03:37):
the diapers so much, but everything else. Oh, I can't
feel it. It's been twenty two years. But you know
what they say, time flies when you're serving the Lord.
I have never heard that one before. It's a non thing.
Just promise me that you won't forget who you are. Oh,
(03:58):
and promise that you won't listen to I'm pretty sure
it's satanic. I'm badon is what makes it so catchy?
Before I leave? Are you one hundred percent certain that
you don't know anything about my parents? I'm a mood.
If I knew anything, i'd tell you. But as you know,
(04:21):
you arrived on our doorstep like Moses in a basket
with nothing. Oh please, not the Moses story again. You
literally arrived in a woven basket, and we gave you everything,
even your name. Maria after the Mother of God and Carmen,
after that famous explorer Carmen san Diego. I love that show.
(04:44):
Here is the address for the job I found via.
Remember we're not far away. Caio step India, Maria, I
love you, and Manna Claudia Elios. There's my tickets. Anyone
did not forget it? Can you can you let me
know when we've arrived at South Beach? Oh? Great, another
(05:06):
innocent angeneue on the way to the big sitting. As
if I didn't have enough to do. Ocean drive, South Beach,
South Beach, Miami, Zies. Do you know where I can
(05:28):
find this address? Well? I don't know. Do I look
like a wise owl? Hold Google Maps? Do you think
I can help guide you? Whether it's walking, driving, or bike?
Come on, get off. Wow, I've never felt sand before.
I don't even think i've ever seen the ocean. That
man is not wearing any pants. Oh my god, this
(05:58):
place is amazing. How a shandelier? I thought those were
only in cartoons. Hello, Hello, good morning, miss Welcome to
the Palace Country Club. Are you a new member? No? Um,
my name is Maria LEL Carwin. I don't know if
I'm at the right address, but today is my first
day of work. Oh you're the girl from the convent.
(06:20):
You're three minutes. I'm sorry, it's just I don't want
to listen to your excuses Muchacha. As I said to
my sister ermana cloudy wait hermana clia as your sister. No,
but she's a childhood friend. So I call her sister,
Ermana Claudy. That's redundant. You're redundant, oh, as I said
to my sis to Ermana Claudia, I got your job
(06:42):
as a lifeguard. Lifeguard. Oh, I thought I was only
going to serve coffees or bus tables. But wow, okay,
I knew those swimming lessons would have eventually pay off.
Why don't they weren't lessons? Per se? Nasana would throw
a milky way into the pool and the orphans had
a race to get it, and we lost a lot
of good kids. Need your tragic life story, me, Hi Foward.
You can leave your stuff in the locker room around
(07:03):
the back. My name is Ector, but you can call
me Ector Enrique Wild. You'll report to me. Here's your uniform.
Please get changed and I'll show you your station. This
is my uniform. Oh my goodness, I'll be practically naked. Look, kid,
(07:25):
you're not the convent anymore. I don't know if you noticed,
but there are thousands of girls on the beach sun
tanning their butt cracks. I keeping sails data SCA. So
either put on the uniform or throw in a habit
and head back. Well, can I at least cover myself
(07:48):
with like a sweater or something. It is a hundred
degrees and more humid than a fart in leather pants.
But it's a free country, so don't come crying to
me when you get a heat stroke. Now hurry them.
(08:08):
And that's where everything really began for our innocent and
sweet and annoyingly naive Maria del Garman. She thought it
was the beginning of her normal life. Maybe she would
meet a moderately handsome boy and they'd fall in love,
and then they'd break up, and she'd find another one,
and then they'd break up and she'd gain ten pounds.
(08:29):
The point is she wanted a normal life, but after
what she saw that night at the beach, a normal
life would be impossible. Of course, Miss Kennedy, I will
(08:55):
change that tennis reservation right away. Okay, goodbye, Jesus, no'm girl,
you look terrible. My ya, Get five chas, Get gluts meal.
It was the longest day ever. I'm so thirsty. Can
I grab a water bottle? Um dose spottles are imported
aqua from Fiji and they are for the Yes, just
(09:20):
take it out of your Paycheck'll be here tomorrow. At
six am. You got it, not six? So three? Not okay? Okay,
say yeah, they'll say so jo No six a m
sector ector enu Yes see you tomorrow. God he's hot. Hey,
(09:51):
hey guys, the beach is closed. Please get out of
the wall water. You can't be out here. Beach is closed. Seriously,
get out of here or I'm gonna have to call security.
The beach is closed. I've got you. Oh, look at her.
(10:25):
She's been a lifeguard for only five hours and she's
already trying to rescue me. Remember the boat crash from
the beginning with the unfortunately placed sea boulder. Yeah, it's
literally happening now and there among the crashing waves, Maria
that garment tried to pull me, Gloria Calderone, to safety.
(10:46):
But when she looked at my lifeless body, she saw
a familiar face. Her face, my face, the face of
her twin sister. No, no, no, what is this? I
can't be It was like looking in a mirror. Well
(11:08):
sort of, I'm like the cute twin. But anyway, this
is the part where I die. I couldn't save her.
Please please forgive me. No, no, I'm not Gloria. Is
(11:30):
it true you have not here with Steve. What I
am not Claudia? Thank god? Where were you thinking, my love?
I thought you were dead? Who are you? Who's Clodia?
Oh my god, you're in shock. Guys, seriously give her
some space. Come, my love. Okay, the car is right here. No,
I don't know you, and I have to save her.
(11:52):
I have to. I have to sing. I got you,
I got you. Get out of the way. Oh my god,
she's so cool. Why's so cool? And that's how poor
innocent Maria del Garmin became me Gloria Calderon. Oh see,
(12:17):
I am Gloria, but she is now also Gloria because
everyone thinks she's me. But I am not Maria del Garment.
Even though I looked like it sounds more complicated than
it actually is, and even though me dying is a
total bummer. Without that accident, Maria del Garman would have
never found out who her real parents were, not to
mention all the juicy secrets that Calderon family was hiding.
(12:39):
But I'm getting ahead of myself again. I told you dramatic,
but I do know one thing for sure. I'm not
the only one who dies in this story. Sorry, that
was dramatic again. If you're enjoying Princess of South Beach,
please subscribe, rate, and review our show wherever you're listening.
(13:02):
The Princess of South Beach is a production of Ihearts,
Michael Tura Podcast Network and Sonoro. Created and directed by
Jasmine Romero. Written by Jasmine Romero and Joanna Houseman, with
help from Daniela Serkis, Monisa Heinris and Christian Hattar. Produced
by Luis Ordo Castillo, Executive produced by Conald Byrne and
Giselle Bances for iHeart by Joanna Housman, and by Jasmine
(13:24):
Romero and Joshua Weinstein or Sonaro performances in this episode
by Rachel Zegler, Andy Bustillos, Yvonne Cole, Alexis Guerreros, Luis
Eduardo Mora, and Eileen Clarke. Our production manager is Guerreensachaitis.
Recording and engineering by Emiliano Quintaner, with sound designed by
Eduin Irigoyen, Cassandra Tinajo, Andres Bayena, Diego Medina and Andres Coronado.
(13:49):
Assistant sound designed by Eric Senttheno, Casting and coordination by
Andres Chaitis. Folly by Samantha Gonzalez fong our theme song
and original music by Rodrigo garcier Roles and Charlie Hernandez
The Princess of South Beach is available in English and
in Spanish. This is the English episode Espanol Regresfidol, I
Heart Radio's My Cultura Network and Sonoro present Princess of
South Beach. Oh leap alone. I don't want to talk
(00:41):
to you tomorrow. When TMC and all all the other
trashy magazines talk about what happened, they'll all say the
(01:04):
same thing that, just one month before her wedding, Miami
socialite Gloria Calderon dramatically ran down the pier, jumped into
her brand new speedboat, and crashed into an unfortunately placed
sea boulder, Yes a sea boulder. Anyway, they'll say that
(01:24):
she miraculously survived without a scratch on her body. But
they'll all be wrong. The magazine's Gloria's boyfriend, her own mother,
because even though everyone saw Gloria swim to shore that night,
Gloria is dead. How do I know? Because I am Gloria. Duh.
(01:49):
But I'm getting ahead of myself. Started with the accident
instead of the beginning. As you've noticed, I have a
flair for the dramatic. It's kind of my thing. So
this story actually begins with an orphan girl named Maria
del Carmen. What the cliche? This is a novella. Of
(02:13):
course there's going to be a poor, innocent orphan raised
in a convent Helloa. See her Mana Claudia. I'm here,
Mariam ha stopped cleaning. You're going to miss your buzz.
I'll help you with your bags. But in Mana Claudia,
according to the tour board, it's my day to do
(02:33):
the floors. Let her Mana Susanna do that. That woman
hasn't lifted a finger since ninety six. No, Nona Susanna, Maria,
are you sure you want to leave? It's not too
late to change your mind. We could always use another
(02:54):
nun here at the convent of Yes, we've been through
this like a million times. I don't want to become
a nun. I want to be a normal person. Not
that nuns aren't normal people, but you know what I mean.
I just want to like pay taxes and complain about
(03:15):
traffic and oh to try a sinnabon. But obviously I'm
super grateful that you, you know, raised me and fed me,
saved my life, you know me. Please, there's no need
to thank me. I loved raising you. As my own,
all of it, even the dirty diapers. Well maybe not
(03:37):
the diapers so much, but everything else. Oh, I can't
feel it. It's been twenty two years. But you know
what they say, time flies when you're serving the Lord.
I have never heard that one before. It's a non thing.
Just promise me that you won't forget who you are. Oh,
(03:58):
and promise that you won't listen to I'm pretty sure
it's satanic. I'm badon is what makes it so catchy?
Before I leave? Are you one hundred percent certain that
you don't know anything about my parents? I'm a mood.
If I knew anything, i'd tell you. But as you know,
(04:21):
you arrived on our doorstep like Moses in a basket
with nothing. Oh please, not the Moses story again. You
literally arrived in a woven basket, and we gave you everything,
even your name. Maria after the Mother of God and Carmen,
after that famous explorer Carmen san Diego. I love that show.
(04:44):
Here is the address for the job I found via.
Remember we're not far away. Caio step India, Maria, I
love you, and Manna Claudia Elios. There's my tickets. Anyone
did not forget it? Can you can you let me
know when we've arrived at South Beach? Oh? Great, another
(05:06):
innocent angeneue on the way to the big sitting. As
if I didn't have enough to do. Ocean drive, South Beach,
South Beach, Miami, Zies. Do you know where I can
(05:28):
find this address? Well? I don't know. Do I look
like a wise owl? Hold Google Maps? Do you think
I can help guide you? Whether it's walking, driving, or bike?
Come on, get off. Wow, I've never felt sand before.
I don't even think i've ever seen the ocean. That
man is not wearing any pants. Oh my god, this
(05:58):
place is amazing. How a shandelier? I thought those were
only in cartoons. Hello, Hello, good morning, miss Welcome to
the Palace Country Club. Are you a new member? No? Um,
my name is Maria LEL Carwin. I don't know if
I'm at the right address, but today is my first
day of work. Oh you're the girl from the convent.
(06:20):
You're three minutes. I'm sorry, it's just I don't want
to listen to your excuses Muchacha. As I said to
my sister ermana cloudy wait hermana clia as your sister. No,
but she's a childhood friend. So I call her sister,
Ermana Claudy. That's redundant. You're redundant, oh, as I said
to my sis to Ermana Claudia, I got your job
(06:42):
as a lifeguard. Lifeguard. Oh, I thought I was only
going to serve coffees or bus tables. But wow, okay,
I knew those swimming lessons would have eventually pay off.
Why don't they weren't lessons? Per se? Nasana would throw
a milky way into the pool and the orphans had
a race to get it, and we lost a lot
of good kids. Need your tragic life story, me, Hi Foward.
You can leave your stuff in the locker room around
(07:03):
the back. My name is Ector, but you can call
me Ector Enrique Wild. You'll report to me. Here's your uniform.
Please get changed and I'll show you your station. This
is my uniform. Oh my goodness, I'll be practically naked. Look, kid,
(07:25):
you're not the convent anymore. I don't know if you noticed,
but there are thousands of girls on the beach sun
tanning their butt cracks. I keeping sails data SCA. So
either put on the uniform or throw in a habit
and head back. Well, can I at least cover myself
(07:48):
with like a sweater or something. It is a hundred
degrees and more humid than a fart in leather pants.
But it's a free country, so don't come crying to
me when you get a heat stroke. Now hurry them.
(08:08):
And that's where everything really began for our innocent and
sweet and annoyingly naive Maria del Garman. She thought it
was the beginning of her normal life. Maybe she would
meet a moderately handsome boy and they'd fall in love,
and then they'd break up, and she'd find another one,
and then they'd break up and she'd gain ten pounds.
(08:29):
The point is she wanted a normal life, but after
what she saw that night at the beach, a normal
life would be impossible. Of course, Miss Kennedy, I will
(08:55):
change that tennis reservation right away. Okay, goodbye, Jesus, no'm girl,
you look terrible. My ya, Get five chas, Get gluts meal.
It was the longest day ever. I'm so thirsty. Can
I grab a water bottle? Um dose spottles are imported
aqua from Fiji and they are for the Yes, just
(09:20):
take it out of your Paycheck'll be here tomorrow. At
six am. You got it, not six? So three? Not okay? Okay,
say yeah, they'll say so jo No six a m
sector ector enu Yes see you tomorrow. God he's hot. Hey,
(09:51):
hey guys, the beach is closed. Please get out of
the wall water. You can't be out here. Beach is closed. Seriously,
get out of here or I'm gonna have to call security.
The beach is closed. I've got you. Oh, look at her.
(10:25):
She's been a lifeguard for only five hours and she's
already trying to rescue me. Remember the boat crash from
the beginning with the unfortunately placed sea boulder. Yeah, it's
literally happening now and there among the crashing waves, Maria
that garment tried to pull me, Gloria Calderone, to safety.
(10:46):
But when she looked at my lifeless body, she saw
a familiar face. Her face, my face, the face of
her twin sister. No, no, no, what is this? I
can't be It was like looking in a mirror. Well
(11:08):
sort of, I'm like the cute twin. But anyway, this
is the part where I die. I couldn't save her.
Please please forgive me. No, no, I'm not Gloria. Is
(11:30):
it true you have not here with Steve. What I
am not Claudia? Thank god? Where were you thinking, my love?
I thought you were dead? Who are you? Who's Clodia?
Oh my god, you're in shock. Guys, seriously give her
some space. Come, my love. Okay, the car is right here. No,
I don't know you, and I have to save her.
(11:52):
I have to. I have to sing. I got you,
I got you. Get out of the way. Oh my god,
she's so cool. Why's so cool? And that's how poor
innocent Maria del Garmin became me Gloria Calderon. Oh see,
(12:17):
I am Gloria, but she is now also Gloria because
everyone thinks she's me. But I am not Maria del Garment.
Even though I looked like it sounds more complicated than
it actually is, and even though me dying is a
total bummer. Without that accident, Maria del Garman would have
never found out who her real parents were, not to
mention all the juicy secrets that Calderon family was hiding.
(12:39):
But I'm getting ahead of myself again. I told you dramatic,
but I do know one thing for sure. I'm not
the only one who dies in this story. Sorry, that
was dramatic again. If you're enjoying Princess of South Beach,
please subscribe, rate, and review our show wherever you're listening.
(13:02):
The Princess of South Beach is a production of Ihearts,
Michael Tura Podcast Network and Sonoro. Created and directed by
Jasmine Romero. Written by Jasmine Romero and Joanna Houseman, with
help from Daniela Serkis, Monisa Heinris and Christian Hattar. Produced
by Luis Ordo Castillo, Executive produced by Conald Byrne and
Giselle Bances for iHeart by Joanna Housman, and by Jasmine
(13:24):
Romero and Joshua Weinstein or Sonaro performances in this episode
by Rachel Zegler, Andy Bustillos, Yvonne Cole, Alexis Guerreros, Luis
Eduardo Mora, and Eileen Clarke. Our production manager is Guerreensachaitis.
Recording and engineering by Emiliano Quintaner, with sound designed by
Eduin Irigoyen, Cassandra Tinajo, Andres Bayena, Diego Medina and Andres Coronado.
(13:49):
Assistant sound designed by Eric Senttheno, Casting and coordination by
Andres Chaitis. Folly by Samantha Gonzalez fong our theme song
and original music by Rodrigo garcier Roles and Charlie Hernandez
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