September 25, 2023 • 58 mins
Jana and her friends totally fangirl when DAVID SILVER HIMSELF joins Whine Down!
Brian Austin Green (Beverly Hills 90210) and his partner Sharna Burgess (Dancing with the Stars) get real about the power of communication in their relationship, which is why they started their own podcast!
Plus, Jana reveals a hilarious truth about the one thing that annoys her about her fiancé Allan.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Wind Down with Janet Kramer, an Imheart Radio podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
Welcome to the New wind Down. We're so professional, So
we're gonna have a sign here. There's gonna be a sign.
There's no who's listening right now, There's there's no sign behind.
But we're gonna put the sign up in Easton, come on,
show your face. He's in the corner over here. Nobody
puts Easton in the corner.
Speaker 1 (00:25):
But with his Channa shirt.
Speaker 2 (00:27):
On, I know he comes. He comes walking up the
driveway like and someone's like, I love it. There was
a little kid coming home from school and like walking
up the driveway. But yeah, ladies, how does it feel?
It's so great. I feel like a professional. I feel underqualified,
(00:48):
but I'm just going with it.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
But it's so cozy great at the same time, I
love it and.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
I'm here for the light. Can I say that as
a forty two year old tired mom. I just love
the natural light at the view is beautiful. Well, we
had in the last set up the ring light would
keep like I had to tape I had to tape down,
yeah all the time. And so this is this is
nice to be able to have. I mean, I'm going
to put some blinds up there because it can be
(01:13):
a little it might be a little hard times for
my little Alabaster, the Alabaster team. But yeah, and then
just like the view, like we can like take in
the view. It's stunning. Thank you love it. Colors are great.
What you got over there, kab Well, I'm not a
champagne fan, so I'm using your pregnancy as an excuse.
(01:36):
But this is just sparkling grape juice. It's organic, so
it makes us feel good. But I think we should
like have a little cheers to the new space. Is
it going to like blow up everywhere? I don't know,
my gosh, that would be hilarious. Have the time that
I spilled red wine on your cow, but I was
dancing on your bar. You don't know about it because
(01:56):
Cat is my little ace in the hole over there,
grab the phone and I danced.
Speaker 1 (02:01):
On the bar and I but and you're pretty sure
there was a lot of people that saw that.
Speaker 2 (02:07):
Cleaned it right up for me?
Speaker 3 (02:08):
Was it me?
Speaker 4 (02:09):
Was it me?
Speaker 3 (02:10):
Ye?
Speaker 2 (02:11):
Credit to you and my brain. I'll take it. Was
I'll take it. You handled it, Michelle is the reason
I spilled it. We were all having fun that night. Yeah,
it was fun. Yeah, so I have a question answer.
Speaker 1 (02:30):
We haven't canceled everything, have we have?
Speaker 2 (02:32):
We canceled everything? Oh like on wedding Welcome to jan
on birthdays. See, in real life, when we talk on
the couches, we she can tell us that she doesn't
want to answer. But when we have heart in the world,
well done, thank you. I know what I want to
do for my fortieth Oh you always have what she
(02:56):
just came up? Well, well, well change, but I did you?
Did you hear what I want to do now in
my fortieth No, I'm nervous. Okay, well now that we're
not doing a private island with fireworks like and you know,
dancing and just just blowing it all the old budget
(03:17):
cut back, we got a house in a baby instead.
She act yes because I was just like, yeah, Catherine
over here blowing all the money, because I'll just never
forget my thirtieth birthday. You walked in. I was like,
covers over my face, like I was like, I'm single,
I'm alone, I'm like I've got I'm just whatever. I
think Eastwood and I had just split up or whatever. Yeah,
(03:39):
oh that was bad for me too. It was your
own personal bat Era, San Diego anyways, but why are
lose my train? I thought, oh yeah, because she had
a baby in your belly where at forty? Because like
the irony, I'm like, okay, I get it all right,
(04:00):
And so I want to do a murder Mystery party
where we're all like our own characters in the murder Mystery.
Like you can have someone christinates it, are you? I
just want to put DIBs on my character because I
feel like character. I'm from Michigan and sometimes it sneaks
out when I say snacks and Kiaki's I've just never
(04:23):
heard I do it, but like I've never heard because
I'm I was like Joly Snack and every morning I
was like Gregor Snack. I just don't want to get
I don't want to get the stock character. Yeah, I
just need like, can we have like a character draft
(04:44):
or something. So that's stuck because I feel like, you
guys know, I'm not going to make a stink. I'll
just always go with whatever, like characters are a good actor. Yeah,
sence doesn't matter, do you know what I mean? And
this is right before you assign me Colonel Mustard. I've
seen this before. Grammar if never. I've never been to
a murder mystery either. Is it going to be too scary? Oh?
(05:06):
Come on, christ, I don't like haunted houses. It's not
a hard somebody has to die. Who's the murder? Well,
murder somebody. I actually would like to. I would like someone.
Speaker 3 (05:23):
To die.
Speaker 2 (05:25):
This what anyway? So I think is it like a
but isn't there like like a well someone will know
that they're the murderer. But like it's like in clue,
like you know that you're the person, right, someone will
come here and run it for us, like yeah, yeah,
like a little chalcout. I haven't really done doing some research.
Yeah I have. So do they listen? And I care
(05:46):
you do and cares like I don't want to do it. No,
I was like the best idea ever, let's go. I
do like it. I just didn't. I just didn't because
I like to. I like to solve things, so that
feels good to me. I think, just to see all
the different personalities, and like the husbands too, like how
like I mean Alan like his like he kind of
(06:08):
always wanted to be an actor too, like, and he's
like non professional playing soccer world. I hope I'm the murderer.
Speaker 1 (06:14):
We have to be careful for the non We would
have to see how it works with those that can't act.
Speaker 2 (06:19):
But like, I feel like we all can't. I feel
like we all do in a way in life. Oh
that's deep but right, and we all can act. I'm
going to do it. I can't. I am going to
bring home this Emmy for U Kramer. I'm so proud
of me. I'm excited.
Speaker 1 (06:38):
Okay, so we know what you want for your fortieth yep,
so that's them great.
Speaker 2 (06:42):
Now I can't. I'm so excited. Murder mystery wedding. I don't.
I don't. I just don't. We're still trying to figure
it out. It's just so expensive. It's a really bad
time to have like everything happened and like plan but
like this, okay, this is actually really funny and I
need to have Alan on the podcast to talk about this,
(07:04):
so I'll save it. But to me, it's one of
those things where I'm like we're having a baby, like
do we really? I want to marry him and I
want to have the wedding, like I said, And also
everything feels a little backwards too, so then it's I'm
trying to like I know, I know, I want the
vision that I want. I would love to have a
(07:26):
wedding like where like I said last podcast where I
was like, he's the only one I actually would love
the wedding with, right, So I want that. I'm just
trying to it's it's it'd be costly for the guests,
and I'm thinking of the guests and just trying to
figure that out, trying to go down Okay, well, how
can we make it look this way? And it's just
it's just a lot and I think we've tabled it
(07:47):
since we've moved in here. We're going to put it
back on the table again. We were held at two
spots okay, date wise the same dates, but it's just
also those things too. I don't want to inconvenience and
do all that, so we're not canceling. But there's also
a piece of me I'm like, what do I really want?
What does he really want? What do we because I
(08:08):
almost I'm like I want to call him. I cannot
wait to call him my husband, and I want to
call him my husband, like now, well head to the
courthouse for going to the courthouse. I still I want
that one moment and I like was like that I
felt wasn't The first one was whatever, we I didn't
even have a wedding. The second, you know, the second
one was like whatar wasn't really in it? Third was
like immensumon to me? You know, But I this is
(08:32):
so different. So I would say this from a guest perspective.
I feel like you and I are wired very similar,
so I would worry about the same thing. But I
would tell you like, for me, it is such a
fun excuse to like actually do the things or go
to the places right, Like I'm like trying to do
(08:52):
like castle tours, and like I didn't know how much
we've shared. I can't remember what is on or I
mean it's definitely gonna mean Scotland. So Scotland to me
is like list and I am like, I it is
such I wouldn't. It would probably be years from now
before I would do it. Well, I'll be just as
happy if it's your backyard or your living room. But
I get it. I'm just speaking like at a guest perspective.
(09:13):
Sure it's expensive, but we're getting the heads up. And
also and I'm trying to like plan really cool things
we just can't cover well.
Speaker 1 (09:22):
Think that, like we probably would never do, right, it's
not something that would make it on our you know,
we just probably would never get to that. So it's
something that we would not normally get to do. We
already know, we're already planning it. We're planning on spending
money for that. We can plan with our family that Hey,
we may not take other trips next year or whatever
that is, but like that's our priority.
Speaker 2 (09:43):
So Sanna's getting married again. I wasn't at the other weddings.
This is my first Jane to do it too.
Speaker 1 (09:50):
So Yeaine, right, Yeah, you just don't worry about us.
And in the day, if we can't do it, we.
Speaker 2 (09:58):
Would go, well we'll have a zoom meeting. But that
we can.
Speaker 1 (10:04):
I mean, if we actually could not, like it is
not feasibly possible. We don't have this money in our account.
We can't go. That would be a conversation. It's you know,
I would love to be there, but I can't. But yeah,
we're planning, we're you know, we're fine, we are going
to go.
Speaker 2 (10:18):
Yeah, so that's where we're I think we just need
to you know, and and you know, everything just we
just need I would say, slow and steady. It's been
my latest slogan, and I think you just go one
baby step, no pun intended at a time. Yeah, just
nice and calm. We've got some boxes to unpack. The
good news is all of our unpacking seems to be
(10:38):
physical for once in Jana kramer Land, and that means good,
not emotional unpacking. It feels good emotionally unpacked. Now we
just got to move in with regular cardboard boxes. Different
and it's been great too, like it was. It was.
It was such a different experience with Alan. Yeah, it
felt really like a partner. That's right, a partner, that's right.
(11:01):
It was. It was really it's been really nice. And
homes by the way, Like I know, we all feel
like it has to be done, but it's okay to
just like live in it and a box at a
time like we got time. It's your house forever. Yeah
for sure. I just like things done, should like sit done.
Like is there campaigns that are due too? I thought
about that after you, so you know there's there's things,
(11:23):
but it's all good. It's just the ticking ticking baby. Yeah.
First thing is to get everything ready for babes. Yeah,
but I'm excited, baby, only needs you and dead death.
And this is the first room that was like the
most put together, because that's why Easton's out here, because
I just like, I had a vision and I just
want this to feel safe and comfortable for us girls
(11:47):
and people that come on.
Speaker 1 (11:48):
So I love it.
Speaker 2 (11:48):
It's perfect, it's sunny, and hopefully we'll be able to
fill that seat with some guests in the near future. Yeah,
like real people. I feel like a real adults in here. Yeah,
(12:12):
all right, so let's shift a little Okay, nine two?
And now did you guys watch it?
Speaker 3 (12:18):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (12:18):
You did? Were you not to know? I had the
bed sheets? But of course she did? Dylan forever? Who
is your favorite?
Speaker 3 (12:26):
Uh?
Speaker 2 (12:26):
Dylan? I went between Brandon Walsh and Dylan, but I
stayed mostly with Dylan. It's kind of doesn't that kind
of like that bad boy? Yes, it's just very obvious
early on I had a type. Yeah, And why didn't
I just acknowledge that because my first husband was a Brandon.
I'm in my Dylan era. I mean now too knows iconic? Yeah.
(12:50):
And then so okay, so they have a podcast, So
Brian is I don't think they've ever got married, right,
I don't think.
Speaker 1 (12:57):
So, Yeah, I don't even know if they're engaged. Are
they engaged?
Speaker 2 (13:00):
I think they're just dating. Let's ask them. Well, they're
in the waiting room, so we have a lot of questions.
But before they come on, though, was there anything off limits?
Because I was asking Catherine a question and I was like,
could I say, can I ask them this? But She's like,
it wasn't on them. I don't don't ask us, So
I feel like, is it just I feel like we
(13:20):
always ask what we're not supposed to ask. Well, then
let's get on that case. Welcome to wine, don't hi? Guys, Hello,
I have the exact same is that the thread? But
there's a thread between us, the one in the back,
that same one in my bathroom. I love It's one
(13:40):
of my favorite connects.
Speaker 5 (13:43):
Ye destined to me? Yeah that's from Tracy, my manager.
Speaker 2 (13:49):
Did she send that for you too?
Speaker 3 (13:51):
No choice when Megan and I got got married. But
I think it's with family and and sort of where
we are. It's I I think it's bigger than just
one one single relationship, you know. I think I think
that thread is is interesting. I don't I don't look
(14:13):
at anything as sort of like failing or succeeding. I
look at like things happening at the point when they're
supposed to and for a specific reason. So this, uh,
this thing makes absolute sense in the concept to me,
in my mind of that thread that connects us always
connects us in one way or another.
Speaker 2 (14:32):
So in theory, I absolutely agree agree with you. But
like if I'm like Sharna, that I'd be like, well,
you had that with your.
Speaker 4 (14:38):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (14:38):
If I think if my fiance brought in like to
our new house, like like a frame that like, I
don't know, I'd be like, it's going in.
Speaker 5 (14:51):
You at all.
Speaker 2 (14:53):
Blink twice if that feels true to you, Blink.
Speaker 6 (14:55):
Twice, right will help you?
Speaker 2 (15:00):
No, it will go missing China, no one ever do it.
Speaker 5 (15:04):
I don't know.
Speaker 4 (15:05):
I don't actually feel that way. I haven't felt that
way about a lot of things. There are some things
like for sure, we wanted to refresh furniture over time,
you know, we ended up buying our own home together,
like to start that life. But and I think those
things happen slowly over time. I certainly didn't feel like
everything must go you know what I mean, It's like, no,
we'll do it as we do it as we build
(15:25):
our life. But I love that frame and I love
what it says, and it came from Tracy, who I
also love deeply. She's family to us, and I agree
with Brian. I think that thread still connects them, but
I think there are also many threads that connect all
of us and the people that come in and out
of your life, and so it rings true and it's
still very important, and she's very much a part of
(15:46):
our life. The thread will always be connected because of
the kids, and so we are all family. So there's
no bad feelings there to be like that cannot be
in this house.
Speaker 2 (15:56):
Yeah, that makes sense. It totally makes sense.
Speaker 3 (15:57):
Although Megan is in our home come like when she's
dropping off or picking up sometimes with the kids and
she'll come in for a little bit. Yeah, and she'll
be holding Zane, and it's like we are one big family.
Speaker 4 (16:08):
You know.
Speaker 3 (16:09):
Family defines itself obviously in different ways, but with her,
it's you know, we we do share so much, and
she now shares so much with Sharna, and they have
an amazing, an amazing connection and friendship and mutual respect
for each other.
Speaker 5 (16:27):
I love for each other because of.
Speaker 2 (16:30):
That, and that's so, yeah, that's so important. I mean
it's kind of For example, my ex husband was here
the other day dropping off the kids because he knew
that me and my fiancer are moving into our new house.
And he's like, you know, I'll just come drop the
kids off. And he came in, he had a beer
with Alan, and it was just like I remember sitting
there going, this is really cool, Like.
Speaker 5 (16:47):
This is really nice.
Speaker 2 (16:49):
This is how it I would have I never would
have dreamt it this way, but I like, this is
I go, this is this is cool? You know. And
having said that, though he did want me to get
rid of the match.
Speaker 5 (17:01):
Did he.
Speaker 2 (17:03):
Of course he did. It was so comfortable.
Speaker 6 (17:07):
Yeah you so you bought the exact same one. I
actually just thought I never knowe and you were like,
you typed in the year numberfore it and they sent
an exact duplicate of it.
Speaker 2 (17:21):
Yeah. I actually felt that way about the couch when
I moved into my husband's bachelor pad.
Speaker 6 (17:25):
I thought the count bran.
Speaker 2 (17:32):
True to you. Okay, I saw the uncomfortability. Yeah yeah,
stage get that out. Couch has gotta go.
Speaker 4 (17:40):
Yeah you kidding that couch has gotta go. You're not
watching TV snuggling on that.
Speaker 2 (17:46):
Couch that hasn't been much snuggling before. I'm sure anyway, Yeah, wait,
you guys met it? Did I read it? At a
coffee shop? Yeah?
Speaker 4 (17:55):
Yeah, so we met at a coffee shop. It was
set up basically by our mutual business manager, which is
crazy that you know, she's not she's great with your finances,
but she's not really a matchmaker, so it was such
a weird request when she individually spoke to both of
us about needing to meet this client of pose. And yeah,
we met at Pedla's book in in Calabasas, and we
(18:17):
were just going to meet for coffee, for breakfast and
talk about a show that he was going to be on,
Mass Dancer, try and make it like not necessarily a
heavy date vibe, but could talk about dance kind of
work vibe. But we ended up sitting and talking for
five hours.
Speaker 3 (18:32):
Even though even though Mass Dancer had for the most
part nothing to do with professional dancing, so there was there.
Speaker 5 (18:39):
It was it was sort.
Speaker 3 (18:41):
Of like, here's something to fall back on in case
you guys have nothing else to talk about.
Speaker 5 (18:45):
But when I heard you know.
Speaker 3 (18:48):
You guys can talk about dancing, I was like, what form.
Speaker 5 (18:52):
Of dancing, you know, like I artistic expression within dancing.
I don't. I don't totally get it.
Speaker 4 (18:58):
Yeah, does I say? We didn't talk about any dancing.
We just talked about life and lots of different things,
and it was really easy and wonderful and it just
felt good. It felt very comfortable and like we'd almost
done it so many times before. And so we continued
to meet for coffees and breakfast very casually, you know,
(19:18):
as Bryce said before. No, it wasn't a hair and
makeup done where your best outfit or you know, be
on your your best for that person. It was just
turning up sort of was who we are, very authentically.
And yeah, we did that for like five times, and
then we kissed for the first time, and then then.
Speaker 2 (19:36):
Then we went to the couch, and then.
Speaker 4 (19:38):
Then we went to the couch. We definitely went to
the bed. Actually by date six.
Speaker 3 (19:43):
It's it's yeah on on a clean new mattress, so
you should feel get it out down.
Speaker 5 (19:55):
And then uh yeah, yeah.
Speaker 4 (19:58):
Then the rest is history, and the rest is then we
end up making a baby, right, we have a fifteen
month old?
Speaker 2 (20:04):
Are you guys, because you're you're just are you going
to are you going to get married? Like what are
you just kind of like whatever with it?
Speaker 4 (20:10):
No, we talk about it all the time, but for
sure will I think we don't feel the need to
rush it at all. You know, we know where in
this this is endgame. We are so blended at the
you know, our family, the kids, everything feels perfect, and
we don't feel the need to rush getting married or
making it official because to us, we already are.
Speaker 3 (20:31):
Yeah, honestly, honestly, making it official at this point is
uh is more for everyone else that's around that is
not part of the family and not in the house.
Speaker 5 (20:40):
Yeah, but we we absolutely live an act like this
is this is it, which which truthfully.
Speaker 4 (20:48):
Is so we do talk about We've talked about what
kind of weddings we like and the way that we
do things or you know, we have those conversations. It's
definitely not like a secret and I you know that
we want to do that with each other. But life
is so very very full with full kids in the house,
and we'll get there when we get there.
Speaker 2 (21:05):
Of course. I kind of like, you know, I'm trying
to like figure that piece out right now too. And
it's like when you have a baby, like I'm we're
about to have a baby, and it's like after that,
it's like we're together. Like it doesn't really like matter,
like it's just I know, he's my person. I'm going
to be with him. And it's like, I mean, we
haven't even gone on vacation together. Well we kind of
skipped all the all the part we did reverse dating
(21:26):
as well, so but it's like it's okay.
Speaker 5 (21:30):
That's what you get. I mean, I got a jump
in first on a new mattress purchase.
Speaker 2 (21:36):
We bought a couch, and then we had three kids,
so that just ths quick. You know, whose idea was
it to do the podcast?
Speaker 4 (21:43):
It was actually Brian and Randy.
Speaker 3 (21:44):
They were talking and Brian, you would be better at
telling this story. Yeah, So I I was doing a
podcast before that was much more like a sort of fun.
There wasn't We didn't really have plan as such. We
my my podcast partner lived in Mississippi, so we sort
(22:07):
of had this thing where we would uh call each
other on Skype or on Zoom and then we would
record for an hour and it was basically just kind
of catching up with each other's lives. But I gotten
to a point where I was really after everything that
was happening in my life. I felt like Sean and I,
I know, when we get into conversations with other people
(22:28):
on their podcasts or in whatever form, we very much
enjoy talking about life and what we've learned and lessons
that are out there and sharing sharing things that we've experienced.
Speaker 5 (22:44):
And so I did.
Speaker 3 (22:46):
Uh. There was a there was a radio show called
Loveline when I was a kid here in Los Angeles.
It was on k Rock, and I did about a
dozen of them, honestly because the k Rock studios were
so close to my house so I could get there
in like five minutes. So they would just reached out
to me and be like, hey, you want to come by,
and so I would. And it was Doctor Drew. Adam
(23:08):
Carolla was on it, but before Adam, this guy poor
Man was on, and the show was basically that we
would talk about things and then they would have callers
and people sort of email. It wasn't even email. They
would they would fact, they would fax in questions and
we would read them on the show. And so I
(23:29):
had this random idea one night of like God, it'd
be really fun in this new medium to do something
similar to that, and I had been following Randy for
a while on Instagram and I know that he's he's
been a professional life coach for the past fifteen years.
Speaker 5 (23:47):
So I reached out to.
Speaker 3 (23:49):
Him initially and I was like, hey, you know, we
hadn't we hadn't talked in fifteen plus years, and so
I said, hey, how's everything going. You know, I've been
following your your your Instagram account, and I was thinking
about a podcast and I think that you and I
could do something really interesting, and so he was into it.
(24:10):
And then I had spoken to Sharna about it. She
was like, God, I would really love to be a
part of a podcast like that. And so then when
I when I talked to Amy u b at iHeart.
Speaker 5 (24:23):
She said to me, she was like yeah.
Speaker 3 (24:25):
She was like, oh, well, would Sharna like to be
on this podcast with you and Randy as well? And
I was like, you know, funny enough, we spoke about
it like two nights ago, and she was saying how
much she would love to do something like this. So
I think, without question, did you just leave me?
Speaker 2 (24:41):
She just left me, That's that's fine.
Speaker 3 (24:46):
So uh so I ended up sitting down with her
and I was, oh, Look who's back.
Speaker 4 (24:51):
I deeply disagree.
Speaker 5 (24:52):
Look who decided? Look who decided to show?
Speaker 2 (24:55):
Is that her signal for your getting long winded or something?
Is that what that was?
Speaker 4 (24:58):
Apparently I'm gonna go say quick, I'm going to go
get a coffee.
Speaker 5 (25:10):
Minutes are you done yet?
Speaker 3 (25:16):
So then we, uh, the three of us ended up
talking and then we're on very similar paths and so
that that's sort of what the podcast has come out of.
Speaker 5 (25:27):
So enough of me talking now.
Speaker 2 (25:30):
I'm curious though, like, is there anything off limits that
you're like, listen, We're not going to go there, because
I know there's things that like when I did my
podcast with Max husband, I wish we could go back
and go man, I wish we didn't share certain things
because the media just runs with things, and then then
you feel like you have to why I did. I
feel like I had to then over explain it, or
(25:51):
not over explain it, but just kind of defend it maybe.
And then there were certain things too. We were still
going through things while sharing an open wound, and it's
like that wasn't healthy for us as a couple.
Speaker 4 (26:00):
Yeah, I can't imagine that that would be healthy. We
haven't really had like a boundaries conversation. I feel like
we're very open transparent people, but we haven't had anything
come up for us that feels like that doesn't feel
good to share.
Speaker 5 (26:13):
You know.
Speaker 4 (26:14):
Our most recent episode was on co parenting, and obviously
there's always going to be things you choose not to
share because some things should stay in that personal space
and they involve other people. But I think we very
openly shared what our experiences are, and always with that
intention of love and kindness and not trying to ever
take other people down or make things more dramatic.
Speaker 5 (26:36):
Than they are.
Speaker 4 (26:37):
But I don't think anything has come up for us
that feels like I don't feel comfortable sharing that.
Speaker 3 (26:44):
I feel like with a podcast like we're doing, it's
incredibly it's invaluable really for us to be as open
and honest about.
Speaker 5 (26:56):
Our life and what's going on.
Speaker 3 (26:58):
I think I think we just naturally will not get
into the weeds on things that we don't want to share,
but we take absolute ownership of what it is we
do share, so then if the media reports on it afterwards,
I don't necessarily feel a need to then defend what
I said because I said it, and I said it
(27:20):
for the purpose of feeling like it was okay to
share at that time. So I sort of feel like
we share what it is we share, media picks it up,
they say whatever they say about it, and then it
sort of goes away because then our next episode comes, yeah,
and we're onto a new topic. And honestly, the media
is going to have a field day with all of
(27:40):
the stuff. I'm sure we're going to end up talking about.
But that's just part of the world we live in
and part of what it is we do that's not the.
Speaker 4 (27:48):
Hot pot of it is that vulnerable share, Like you know,
I recently shared even two of the episodes we did,
that just gets made into clickbait headlines and it's a
it's a it's a headline, and then it's an edited
trend script and you're taking out specific words or lines
and you don't have the tone in there, and it
can be read a completely different way. And that's hard
that I've had that realization of like, oh my gosh,
(28:10):
anything I say ken and will be used in a
public platform. But again, I know what I said, I
speak very clearly, and I know my intention behind it,
and anyone that truly wants to know the real story
can always come and listen to it to actually understand.
But we will never just from simply being in the
public eye, whether we do it on a podcast or
(28:31):
an interview or people photograph us somewhere else. We're never
going to get out of that part of life where
people are going to fill the gaps with their own
story and their own narrative. Oh they're not holding hands,
or they're not looking at each other or whatever it is.
Someone's always going to make drama out of nothing, or
make it bigger than what it is at the very least.
And so I think that's just part of accepting that
(28:52):
we are we're on this journey. We've said we want
to be transparent and vulnerable and share, and that is
going to come with That opens up to people having
an opinion and filling it with their own experiences and narrative,
and we've got to be okay with that. But if
what we are talking about helps a few people, then
they can relate to it, or it's a source of
inspirational motivation for them, then that's awesome too. And we're
(29:17):
never going to have one without the other. That is
the balance of life. That is the ying and Yang,
and so we have to accept that all of those
things can and will happen.
Speaker 2 (29:38):
So for people that are listening, Alsh is the name
of the podcast, which I can really relate to. I
just I'm turning forty two in a couple of months.
It feels very accurate. Grew up watching you, which matters,
you know, Like this is it's a really cool. It's
just really neat to watch people that we grew up
with actually get vulnerable and talk about real life a bit.
So it's the two of you Randy Spelling, which is
(30:00):
pretty dynamite trio. So what can what can they expect
when they tune in to listen to Oldish? Like what
is is there one I guess one demographic of a
person that you're you think of when you're speaking, is
it what's your main goal in doing it?
Speaker 4 (30:14):
No?
Speaker 3 (30:14):
Are for me personally, there is no demographic. I feel
like the things that we are talking about, we're we're
only sharing our perspective, which is an Oldish perspective. We
we have gone the full distance with some of these things,
and we have we have experienced hard situations and we've
(30:35):
come out the back end of it. And so for
us to then share with people what the entire experience was.
I think makes makes it easier for some people that
are just newly in something to realize like, oh, there
is an end to this, Like this doesn't as much
as this feels like this is an end all situation
(30:57):
and I'm just going to give up and I don't
know what to do. They realize from the from the
stories that we're sharing and what it is we've experienced
that the problems in life aren't They are much more
common than people would realize, and there is a beginning, middle,
(31:18):
and the possible end for these things. So you kind
of have to open your eyes a bit more and
see that. And I think if we can help people
of all ages deal with that, then we can't. The
only thing that's put us, I think, in this space
is the fact that we are oldish, that we have
gone we've lived as much life as we've had, and
(31:39):
we've come out the back end of it. Randy same thing.
He has lived so much life. He's now a life coach.
Like he's he's able to help people from experience in
dealing with things, not just in a sense of like
he reads books and so he knows what to say
he can really ask those questions because he asked them
(32:03):
of himself.
Speaker 4 (32:04):
Yeah, which is really cool. And like, as far as
the name goes, oldish doesn't mean even a number. I
think in your twenties you can feel oldish in comparison
to where you've come from, or it's a part of
your life. Maybe for those in their twenties that already
have three kids, you know, and they're living that experience,
it's age again. Oldish again. It's not a number. It
is a moment where you are have reached in your
(32:26):
life and what you've got in front of you. It's
the things that you're facing, which is the stuff that
we talk about. I think, you know, people in the
twenties can listen to us and have questions about disappointment
or we're talking about addiction this week, and relate to
them and maybe find some really great advice from people
that have been through stuff and found their way to
that ending that Brian is talking about. So every week
(32:48):
we do an episode, we pick a subject and we
talk about it, and then we follow up with questions
that fans have sent in that week with our second
episode and have live people people call in live and
I think that's a really cool element, like the love
line thing, that we get to speak to people and
they can air their concerns and situations with us and
(33:08):
chat to people that they probably never thought went through
things like this and find a commonality and find almost
community within what they're going through and experiencing and not
feeling alone, because I think there is also so much
power in that and feeling support and finding a commonality
with people.
Speaker 2 (33:26):
The connection piece is really important.
Speaker 4 (33:28):
That.
Speaker 2 (33:29):
Yeah, the being able to call in. I mean I
can imagine sometimes when you're listening you find that great
deal of comfort, and I know, like we've shared here,
there's sometimes I leave the podcast and I'm like vulnerability
hangover I said too much. I can almost feel it.
I'm like, oh, it's al so good in the minute,
and now I'm like, do I need to call a
couple of people and let them know or But I
(33:49):
do think when they get to call and actually talk
to you, that's like a really important piece. That's the
old school radio piece I think we all miss totally. Yeah,
it's a real human connection. Yeah, yeah, it's called connection
and we need it.
Speaker 3 (34:02):
Yeah, It's it's amazing because then you have these real
genuine conversations with people. There there's so many times where
I hear somebody speak and one of the things in
my mind is a question will pop up right away
and you're like, God, I wonder what this experience was like.
And so for people then to be able to call
in or send in questions and get answers to those
(34:25):
burning things that pop into their mind while they're listening
to an episode is really fun. I mean, what we
do is really has been really fun so far, doing
these follow up episodes the same the same week and
getting and really finishing these discussions for the week not
finished for I mean, honestly, we may revisit topics a
(34:49):
dozen times within the lifetime we.
Speaker 6 (34:51):
Talked about me.
Speaker 2 (34:53):
Yeah, we revisit Brian. For you, though, what is what
is something that's a common thread like that you could
that you are feel like you always not always struggle with,
but it has been a struggle for you in your past,
and that's something that you have to continue to work on.
That you might that that that you might share on
the podcast. We know you're not good at dancing.
Speaker 5 (35:21):
I'm gonna go get water real fast.
Speaker 3 (35:27):
I think the thing that I'm always uh pushing myself
being is recognizing like my authentic feelings in a moment.
Speaker 5 (35:41):
And and then.
Speaker 3 (35:43):
Talking myself through those and sharing those. I so much
of the time when I was younger in life, I
would have these feelings and then automatically you kind of
go to this place in your mind of judging those
feelings and is it appropriate for me to be feeling
this way. Oh I should hide the fact that I'm
feeling that way, or oh it's you. You end up
(36:05):
with all these like dirty little secrets because you're not.
Speaker 2 (36:08):
I feel like anxiety too. That might stem like.
Speaker 3 (36:11):
Yeah, it it affects everything across the board. Yeah, you start.
I would start feeling anxiety in all sorts of ways.
I would feel anxiety. If I would be walking into
a Starbucks and ordering a drink. I didn't want to
look the person uh behind the counter in the eyes
because I thought right away, oh, my god, they're judging me,
or they're judging something I did, or And and it
(36:32):
was because I wasn't I hadn't really been authentic with
myself in dealing with those and figuring out what it
is that was going on and what I was feeling
insecure about and why and as soon as I as
soon as I did, and as soon as I started
conversing with people around me, it's amazing how many similarities
(36:54):
there were. And and then you start going to Starbucks
and realizing like, oh my god, the guy behind the
counter has just as much, if not more, going on
in his life than I do. So the last thing
that he's thinking is, oh, it's this guy, and oh boy,
the last project he did, but.
Speaker 5 (37:11):
He could care less and he's.
Speaker 3 (37:13):
You know, nine times out of ten, he's much more
judgmental of himself of like, oh my god, it's this
guy and I'm standing behind the counter in a Starbucks
and this is not where I want to be in
my life.
Speaker 5 (37:22):
And so what you start.
Speaker 3 (37:26):
I'm constantly trying to find the commonalities in my life
with other people that are around me and create as
much of a sense of belonging as possible, and sort
of you build that core that tribe around you. And
(37:47):
I find the more that I do that, the bigger
that tribe gets. The more I share, the more people
feel like they have things in common with me, and
they realize that they do. And then I'm not on
an island of one, you know.
Speaker 2 (38:05):
Yeah, Well, then you have people that will lean in.
And I feel like Sharna is the best partner because
she's a very friendly You lean in, You're always so
kind and nice, and you wanted to have the conversations right,
and you wanted to be are you okay? And you
genuinely care about other people. So to have that person
in your life too, when you're going through anxiety or
(38:27):
whatever you're feeling, to have someone that actually listens to
you and that makes you and not make you feel
crazy for whatever your feeling or thinking about.
Speaker 4 (38:34):
Yeah, I think that's true for both of us, though
you know, I've had my own share of anxiety and insecurities.
Definitely went through my space of not knowing how to
voice my feelings or my wants and needs.
Speaker 2 (38:48):
In this relationship and before or just not with.
Speaker 4 (38:51):
Brian in the all the work that I trade off
to my previous relationships. But it's still every now. Even
though Brian is a amazing listener and a wonderful supporter
and partner and we do life really well together, my
things can still come up every now and then if
I'm not staying on top of them and on top
of you know, watching my own self talk or making
(39:13):
sure that I'm honoring my wants and needs, or taking
time for me to recharge, like all these things that
I know that help me be my best and communicate
my best. But what is so incredible is because we
are so transparent with each other and have those wonderful conversations,
the hard conversations. I can go to him and say,
I am feeling completely depleted and oversensitive and I just
(39:36):
need I just need a day or two and I
need to do this, and he can help me stay
accountable for that for myself, and it's really wonderful. If
he's feeling some type of way, I can always check
in with him and say, hey, here's this going on,
or I'm feeling this coming from you, where are you at?
And we have really amazing check ins with each other
instead of feeling reactive to what the other person's going
(39:59):
for Because certainly, when I'm feeling depleted and over sensitive,
like hyper sensitive, I can come off as a dick,
you know what I mean. I can my energy can
just feel wrong because I'm again, I'm just reactive to things.
I've got nothing left.
Speaker 2 (40:13):
And it's not I mean, that's me, that's me too,
That's like, yeah, yeah, I mean, and it's nothing, it's
no reflection, you know, to Bri like you're not meaning
for And I literally just had this conversation with Alan
before we moved into the house. I'm like, I know
we haven't done this yet. I was like, can we
do a check in because I was like, I'm just
gonna I need to just kind of tell you, like
I needed to affirm him how amazing he's been and
(40:35):
just you know how incredible he is. But also like
I know how I get in stressful situations, I lash
out at the ones closest to me, And I was like,
and I don't want to do that and be like
for you to be on the receiving end. So if
almost you can help me, like and just kind of
like if you can see like an hour, I'm gonna
come grab your hand and you're gonna know that this
(40:56):
means I just need to take a breath with you
and just like yeah, because I don't don't want to
be hurtful with my works. I don't mean to be
to that person, you know.
Speaker 4 (41:05):
Yes, yes, absolutely, I think it's so important to open
up that conversation, and truly, I think everyone wants to
have that conversation. You just don't feel safe or confident
in approaching it right because by doing that, you are
airing some of your own feelings in dirty laundry, maybe
that you're still trying to not really dirty laundry, but feelings,
(41:26):
feelings and insecurities right that you're still working through and
to show those to your partner. I think, no matter
how long you've been together, if you're not in the
practice of sharing those things, it can be really hard.
But it is one of the most beautiful helpful things
in a relationship. That and also I think acknowledging and
this is something that we do but still are working on,
is when you are listening to that other person, it's
(41:48):
really helpful to ask how would you like me to
best be for you in this situation? Would you like
me to help you through it and help you find
a solution, or would you like me to just listen?
Is also a really big thing when you're sharing. Sometimes
you just need to share and don't give me solutions yet.
I'm not ready to hear how to fix it. I
just want to share it with you so you can
(42:09):
be just in this boat with me for a second,
or on this island with me for a second, because
I feel like I'm on my arm.
Speaker 3 (42:14):
The practice that we've learned that we've been really trying
to implement is is the concept of when somebody is
going through something and they just need to speak and
they need to talk to you about stuff, to then
reiterate what it is you heard so they hear it
and they know whether you.
Speaker 5 (42:34):
Actually heard correctly or not.
Speaker 3 (42:36):
It's really important because sometimes you'll say all of these
things and then the other person just just didn't really
ingest what it is you said. So it's good to know, like, okay,
So not only am I going to share with you
what's going on, but we're then going to share the
concept of okay, so what is it that you heard?
(42:58):
What I heard you say? Is you need more time
with this, or you feel this way, or or I
made you feel this way in life. So you kind
of create this, You create this sort of bond in
speaking and listening to each other, which is the two
go hand in hand, and it's really important to build
the skills in both. I think it's important too for
(43:21):
people to realize that somebody that is further along that
path and better at some things than others they're they're
not just better people. Like everybody is constantly growing, everybody
is constantly building new skills and practicing new things. We
(43:41):
have just as many issues come up, we just through repetition,
have gotten better at working through things. But that's all
it is. It's not necessarily that somebody is more elevated
than another. You learn these tools and these tricks and
these things that you can use to help you communicate
(44:02):
better with the people that are around you. Yeah, listen better,
be be kinder, be more empathetic, and they're they're all
of these things that you honestly gain just in doing it.
Speaker 5 (44:15):
It just living life.
Speaker 3 (44:17):
So you know, be be kind to yourself as you're
going through this experience. Be be okay with the fact
that you're not great at things right away that nobody is.
Speaker 5 (44:30):
It takes practice.
Speaker 3 (44:31):
Just like when you were young and you were in
math class or science class or history class. Communication with
people is not something that that you learn readily at
home when you're younger, and so so it's okay to
then learn at a later age, but at least you're
open to learning. So it's like, yeah, you grow with
(44:52):
the people that are around you. Find people that are
on that similar path as you and are willing to
do that work with you and and then you grow
together and it can be it can create these bonds
with people that are that are just amazing and so
much deeper than you ever knew it was possible.
Speaker 2 (45:22):
I mean, I even feel that for the women that
are with me here, I feel like we're so honest.
I feel like we even when we don't really want
to talk about things, we still talk about things. Are
we going to cry? No, okay, just check it out,
all right. It's just hard to the that's the hard
part for me. Well, like if there's a problem, he
always is like, I'm like, I just need you to
listen to me. I was like, and just to hear me.
(45:43):
You did nothing wrong. I'm just but he was like,
you know, always trying to fix.
Speaker 1 (45:47):
Yeah, And that's usually a man thing too, And I
think it's a lot of me and you because of
like work. I'm like, okay, so how do we fix this?
Speaker 2 (45:54):
Like what?
Speaker 1 (45:54):
And then I'm like, okay, wait, she really just needs
to sit with this for a minute.
Speaker 2 (45:58):
So I've tried to do better at that.
Speaker 5 (46:02):
Fixing.
Speaker 3 (46:03):
It's and a lot of times people the fixing that
is done is done internally with that person. Sometimes they
just needed to be heard and they just needed to
express and they need to hear it out loud, and
they needed to know that no matter what it is
they were thinking or feeling or how outrageous it felt,
that they're still loved as they're feeling that. So then
(46:25):
so then it sort of takes the sting out of it,
and you don't feel like such a freak in feeling
something in the first place. You feel like, oh god,
I could I had a terrible day, but I'm still
loved by the people that are around me. I was
able to share that, and I wasn't frowned upon it
was I shared that in a safe place and I'm
still absolutely loved and we were able to laugh afterwards
(46:48):
and have a drink or have dinner, or we continue
to be ourselves and you grow. You grow with that experience.
That one experience leads to another one because you felt
comfortable in doing it, and then you start feeling more
and more comfortable with the people that are around you
that listen and accept you for who you are.
Speaker 4 (47:07):
I think the fixing thing I relate to because that
was me I grew up wanting to fix things, fixed relationships,
fix people. It was just to came from my childhood
and the things that are you know, the programming, right,
but the learning that it is not my job to
fix other people. It's not and it's not fair for
me to take that from them to fix their things
(47:28):
or to push it on them. I can ask them
in that conversation, how can I be how can I
be your best friend in this? Would you like me
to listen or help you fix it? But it is
not for me to take that from them. To help
them fix it, that is their journey to figure out
and I can of course be support in that, but
it is not for me to push that on them.
And so that's a really big that was a really
(47:50):
big thing for me to learn. And also fixing up
people's things was a way for me to deflect and
not look at myself, right, So that's there's also that
there's layers to it for me. But yeah, yeah, the
wanting to fix a problem is I totally get you,
I totally get you, like, but I can I can
help with this, but really it's not about you. It's
about them and them getting to it on their own time, right, And.
Speaker 2 (48:12):
That's good messages for kids too. You know, I'm sure
that's how really, you know sure, it's like you want
to fix your kid's heartbreak from not being able to
have his first kiss. I'm like, oh yeah, I mean
that's that's a still example. But you know what I mean, Like,
I'm sure, because what's how what's the oldest for you guys.
Speaker 5 (48:28):
Twenty one and then the youngest is fifteen months?
Speaker 2 (48:31):
Okay, yeah, but.
Speaker 4 (48:32):
In the home, wak in the home cash is road
is living his best life. So we have eleven, nine,
seven and fifteen months in the house.
Speaker 2 (48:42):
You know, I was I was angry as a parent
for you when I saw that stuff that hit on
you know, the stupid tabloids and stuff. And I'm like,
for me, that's that's my hardest piece. Like when someone
because when someone comes after my kids, that's where I
have an issue. Like that's where it's like.
Speaker 5 (48:58):
Oh yeah, when someone is yeah.
Speaker 2 (49:01):
Yeah, I'm like whether they did or didn't, who sing cares,
you know what I mean, Like, just let them be, like,
let them parent how they want a parent. Like I
just it sent me like I was so angry because
I'm like, again, I can look at the stories now
that they pick up and I'm like, yeah, okay, whatever,
Like they hate me, they hate me, it's fine, but
(49:22):
like when it comes to my kids, I'm like, don't
go there, Like and were then attacking your your parenting
where it's like you don't know the truth this this
random nanny that was that a thing might have you know,
I'm like, who like it? Just I hated every piece
of that article. I know you ended up I think
tweeting something, but I was just like, that's that's hard.
And then it's also probably hard for them too as
(49:42):
they're getting older, you know, be like, what the heck?
Speaker 4 (49:45):
And then what's so hot about it is? Because it's
so public and those things live forever, and one day
these kids are guard to they don't right now have
access to the internet and be able to probably have
be one day and searched inding and see what comes up.
And I hate that that exists. I hate that one
day they're going to see these things because none of
(50:07):
it's real or fair. It's just made up for a
clickbait headline for people to get on and push their
own agenda of whatever they feel like, and it's all
just fluff and bullshit. But it's hurtful to kids. You know,
as adults, we can go they hate me whatever, I
don't care. But they're going to grow up and be
very vulnerable at some point in their life and these
things that they're going to read may negatively affect them
(50:28):
and that really sucks.
Speaker 2 (50:30):
Well, it really works you guys as parents, and you know,
the co parenting side to you, guys will be able
to share your wisdom, everything that you've learned as well,
you know, And that's that's how it's tough.
Speaker 5 (50:42):
We try.
Speaker 3 (50:43):
I mean, that's that's the purpose of what it is
we're doing now. And honestly, I find genuine joy.
Speaker 5 (50:49):
In doing it.
Speaker 3 (50:50):
When when we get to the end of an episode
somebody has called in live with things to talk about
and concerns and things they're dealing with, and we've been
able to help them at all.
Speaker 5 (51:00):
It just feels amazing. That's that.
Speaker 3 (51:04):
I love the feeling of sharing, sharing things that I've
learned and it possibly helping anyone. I mean, we are
in this crazy, crazy situation where.
Speaker 5 (51:20):
The media does.
Speaker 3 (51:22):
They do turn their eyes towards what it is we're
going through and they report on it, and so we
have this strange soapbox that that that we can use
for good or just for for gossip and personal personal reasons.
(51:42):
And I love the feeling of, oh, we're trying to
use it for as much good as we possibly can.
I've learned way more in life from my failures than
I have for my successes, and so I think it's
important to keep that in mind with people and help
them understand that, like, what what it is you're going
through right now is hard, but it's these hard things
(52:06):
that you're going to look back on in life and
you're going to realize these are the things that created
who I am today.
Speaker 5 (52:12):
Successes are easy.
Speaker 3 (52:13):
You stumble into them, you go, oh my god, I
can't believe it's going so well, and you learn nothing
from it. You just continue to do what it is
you're doing. It's the stumbles that you have in life
that force you to look down and realize, like, Okay,
what did I trip on in the first place?
Speaker 5 (52:28):
What's going on? What can I change?
Speaker 3 (52:30):
We're different shoes, you know, there are different ways of
dealing with things, and it's those it's those experiences that
create that that movement and that change.
Speaker 2 (52:40):
Yeah. I love that. Well, I'm excited to listen to
the podcast. It's on iHeartRadio, so you know, got to
support the whole team. But how to listen to Oldish
on iHeartRadio with Sharna, Brian and Randy. Thank you guys
so much for coming on the show. Appreciate it.
Speaker 5 (52:54):
Thank you guys. Bye.
Speaker 2 (52:57):
It's nice to see couples that I like, been through it,
go through it and like continue to work on things together.
That makes sense. Like yes, it's like they both obviously
have their things that come up from past, like we
all do, but how they seem to at least communicate
to each other is beautiful and I feel like that
(53:18):
comes with age too, Like how I was saying some
of the things like the check ins with Alan, you
know that I don't. I know, I don't want to
repeat things from my past, so I have to check myself.
I've been checking myself a lot lately, have you. Yeah,
well even till Jana. We walked the other day and
she said, how are things with you? Impressed? And I said,
actually good because I think I go to him first,
(53:40):
which is so silly, but I caught. I got caught
in this. Like even just to pray about it first
is great, and I'll still do that, but there are
times where I'm just like God moves the pieces, or
I would save all my things and come into therapy
with like the laundry list, and instead I'm just like
I've I'm finding better times to maybe say it for
both of us where we can both hear it, because
(54:01):
that's been an issue before. I'm so like I either
fly off the handle or bury it all or nothing.
But I do a lot of what they're saying and
have said. It resonates with me a lot, just the
turning towards each other, the vulnerability. I don't like to
be vulnerable, so that's why I usually am like a
little bag razor blades and I don't go to him first. Yeah.
Is there one thing that your partner though I don't
(54:22):
know that does though that you guys, it's like the
little thing so this is let's just be silly little
that you're just like this annoys me about you popcorn
so fat? Oh definitely it's the.
Speaker 1 (54:34):
One thing talked about this because I'm scared to eat
around you.
Speaker 2 (54:38):
Because he chomps. She just doesn't.
Speaker 1 (54:41):
Yeah, when we were out on wind down.
Speaker 2 (54:45):
That's right because people chewing hmm, to chew hard for
me and chumps and then are you like are you
does he? I know I feel it down my spine
while we talk about it. It's not his fault, he's
just being a human. I can't do it though.
Speaker 1 (55:00):
Katin uh, probably just like remembering things or like asking
like what are we doing? I don't know, look at
the calendar, you know, like that just drives me crazy.
Speaker 2 (55:09):
Well, you, is there a reason you brought to go?
It's just funny because again I love Alan listen, we
love him so much. But I think there was one
thing that happened like last week where I was just like, oh,
this is cute, like because it's it where you like
(55:33):
there it is, there it is, but it's like the
silliest thing. Okay, Like I don't want to go shopping
with him anymore. Oh tell me? Like he tries everything on.
This is why they took attendance away from the dressing rooms,
(55:54):
because no one needs to tried it on it like
a dicks. No.
Speaker 1 (55:59):
I do have my kids try stuff on a Dix.
But it's very annoying.
Speaker 2 (56:02):
Because your kids, because they're growing.
Speaker 1 (56:06):
One door, you got to go find someone to go
open it.
Speaker 2 (56:08):
Like how many times have you worn Nike and Adidas
in your life. Yeah, But I'm just like, I mean,
we're just going I thought we were just going in,
Like know what were we going in for? I can't
even remember. Oh, because he had to he flew back
because what he was dealing with the piece of stuff
or whatever, and so he wanted to get some more
(56:29):
like running shorts or whatever, and so I'm just thinking
and we had somewhere to go after that too, so
we had like a thirty minute window, well like forty
five minutes to an hour. I'm like, how are we
still in Dicks?
Speaker 4 (56:41):
You know?
Speaker 2 (56:42):
But I'm just trying to be like, hey, babe, like
where are you a He's like, I'm in the dressing room.
And I was like it took I mean, I didn't
say anything, but I was like, oh my god, I
never want to go shopping with Did you stay in
the car? Were you inside?
Speaker 4 (56:53):
Well?
Speaker 2 (56:54):
At first, I was like, I'm going to go to
the car because it was taking a minute, and I
was just like I could I know, I was like
I don't want to. Yeah, Like, but they're wearing hard
I'm like, what the hell is he doing in there?
Like has there been a robbery? Can I get a
well check that something about it? And he's in the
dressing room like trying to find like Alan a little
mark polo with the Scottish guy, and then like he
(57:16):
goes to the shoes. Actually, no, we gotta go come on. Yeah,
I can you imagine if Cinderella popped off his little
man slipper and we went through that. It's just so
funny because I haven't like everything I've done that he's
done has been like so cute, not this one, you know,
And so I was just like, I think he says
he's going to go shopping. Yeah, he's so he's way
more stylish than I am. Like, well, he's just very
(57:37):
I what I've gained from my time with Alan is
he's a pretty thorough and intentional guy.
Speaker 3 (57:41):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (57:42):
Is His pace seems not rushed ever, never rushed, never
ever rushed.
Speaker 4 (57:48):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (57:48):
And I'm like, let's go go, go, go, go, go,
go go go. Yeah. And I'm learning to slow down
with him. But I think that's actually like his the
culture over there is so much slower and calmer and
content and right and all so like now, like when
he goes to like the gros Strum, like have a
great time, and I know I'll see him like an
hour and a half, you know, like that, like I
just won't go now, yeah, yeah, I don't go because
(58:12):
I'm like, this is but yeah. So it was just
funny because I was I was chuckling to myself and
I was just there it is. There's nothing again, nothing bad.
It was just that that first thing that I was like, oh, yeah,
now I know. Yeah, I gotta tell you I have
zero interest in ever being in my underwear under those
lights ever again. Ever, well, I think it might be
a female thing too, but maybe so I don't like yeah,
(58:34):
but anyways, sorry tangent. I just had to that's very interesting.
Did Well, this has been fun. We'll see you next week,
ya I
Wind Down with Janet Kramer, an Imheart Radio podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
Welcome to the New wind Down. We're so professional, So
we're gonna have a sign here. There's gonna be a sign.
There's no who's listening right now, There's there's no sign behind.
But we're gonna put the sign up in Easton, come on,
show your face. He's in the corner over here. Nobody
puts Easton in the corner.
Speaker 1 (00:25):
But with his Channa shirt.
Speaker 2 (00:27):
On, I know he comes. He comes walking up the
driveway like and someone's like, I love it. There was
a little kid coming home from school and like walking
up the driveway. But yeah, ladies, how does it feel?
It's so great. I feel like a professional. I feel underqualified,
(00:48):
but I'm just going with it.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
But it's so cozy great at the same time, I
love it and.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
I'm here for the light. Can I say that as
a forty two year old tired mom. I just love
the natural light at the view is beautiful. Well, we
had in the last set up the ring light would
keep like I had to tape I had to tape down,
yeah all the time. And so this is this is
nice to be able to have. I mean, I'm going
to put some blinds up there because it can be
(01:13):
a little it might be a little hard times for
my little Alabaster, the Alabaster team. But yeah, and then
just like the view, like we can like take in
the view. It's stunning. Thank you love it. Colors are great.
What you got over there, kab Well, I'm not a
champagne fan, so I'm using your pregnancy as an excuse.
(01:36):
But this is just sparkling grape juice. It's organic, so
it makes us feel good. But I think we should
like have a little cheers to the new space. Is
it going to like blow up everywhere? I don't know,
my gosh, that would be hilarious. Have the time that
I spilled red wine on your cow, but I was
dancing on your bar. You don't know about it because
(01:56):
Cat is my little ace in the hole over there,
grab the phone and I danced.
Speaker 1 (02:01):
On the bar and I but and you're pretty sure
there was a lot of people that saw that.
Speaker 2 (02:07):
Cleaned it right up for me?
Speaker 3 (02:08):
Was it me?
Speaker 4 (02:09):
Was it me?
Speaker 3 (02:10):
Ye?
Speaker 2 (02:11):
Credit to you and my brain. I'll take it. Was
I'll take it. You handled it, Michelle is the reason
I spilled it. We were all having fun that night. Yeah,
it was fun. Yeah, so I have a question answer.
Speaker 1 (02:30):
We haven't canceled everything, have we have?
Speaker 2 (02:32):
We canceled everything? Oh like on wedding Welcome to jan
on birthdays. See, in real life, when we talk on
the couches, we she can tell us that she doesn't
want to answer. But when we have heart in the world,
well done, thank you. I know what I want to
do for my fortieth Oh you always have what she
(02:56):
just came up? Well, well, well change, but I did you?
Did you hear what I want to do now in
my fortieth No, I'm nervous. Okay, well now that we're
not doing a private island with fireworks like and you know,
dancing and just just blowing it all the old budget
(03:17):
cut back, we got a house in a baby instead.
She act yes because I was just like, yeah, Catherine
over here blowing all the money, because I'll just never
forget my thirtieth birthday. You walked in. I was like,
covers over my face, like I was like, I'm single,
I'm alone, I'm like I've got I'm just whatever. I
think Eastwood and I had just split up or whatever. Yeah,
(03:39):
oh that was bad for me too. It was your
own personal bat Era, San Diego anyways, but why are
lose my train? I thought, oh yeah, because she had
a baby in your belly where at forty? Because like
the irony, I'm like, okay, I get it all right,
(04:00):
And so I want to do a murder Mystery party
where we're all like our own characters in the murder Mystery.
Like you can have someone christinates it, are you? I
just want to put DIBs on my character because I
feel like character. I'm from Michigan and sometimes it sneaks
out when I say snacks and Kiaki's I've just never
(04:23):
heard I do it, but like I've never heard because
I'm I was like Joly Snack and every morning I
was like Gregor Snack. I just don't want to get
I don't want to get the stock character. Yeah, I
just need like, can we have like a character draft
(04:44):
or something. So that's stuck because I feel like, you
guys know, I'm not going to make a stink. I'll
just always go with whatever, like characters are a good actor. Yeah,
sence doesn't matter, do you know what I mean? And
this is right before you assign me Colonel Mustard. I've
seen this before. Grammar if never. I've never been to
a murder mystery either. Is it going to be too scary? Oh?
(05:06):
Come on, christ, I don't like haunted houses. It's not
a hard somebody has to die. Who's the murder? Well,
murder somebody. I actually would like to. I would like someone.
Speaker 3 (05:23):
To die.
Speaker 2 (05:25):
This what anyway? So I think is it like a
but isn't there like like a well someone will know
that they're the murderer. But like it's like in clue,
like you know that you're the person, right, someone will
come here and run it for us, like yeah, yeah,
like a little chalcout. I haven't really done doing some research.
Yeah I have. So do they listen? And I care
(05:46):
you do and cares like I don't want to do it. No,
I was like the best idea ever, let's go. I
do like it. I just didn't. I just didn't because
I like to. I like to solve things, so that
feels good to me. I think, just to see all
the different personalities, and like the husbands too, like how
like I mean Alan like his like he kind of
(06:08):
always wanted to be an actor too, like, and he's
like non professional playing soccer world. I hope I'm the murderer.
Speaker 1 (06:14):
We have to be careful for the non We would
have to see how it works with those that can't act.
Speaker 2 (06:19):
But like, I feel like we all can't. I feel
like we all do in a way in life. Oh
that's deep but right, and we all can act. I'm
going to do it. I can't. I am going to
bring home this Emmy for U Kramer. I'm so proud
of me. I'm excited.
Speaker 1 (06:38):
Okay, so we know what you want for your fortieth yep,
so that's them great.
Speaker 2 (06:42):
Now I can't. I'm so excited. Murder mystery wedding. I don't.
I don't. I just don't. We're still trying to figure
it out. It's just so expensive. It's a really bad
time to have like everything happened and like plan but
like this, okay, this is actually really funny and I
need to have Alan on the podcast to talk about this,
(07:04):
so I'll save it. But to me, it's one of
those things where I'm like we're having a baby, like
do we really? I want to marry him and I
want to have the wedding, like I said, And also
everything feels a little backwards too, so then it's I'm
trying to like I know, I know, I want the
vision that I want. I would love to have a
(07:26):
wedding like where like I said last podcast where I
was like, he's the only one I actually would love
the wedding with, right, So I want that. I'm just
trying to it's it's it'd be costly for the guests,
and I'm thinking of the guests and just trying to
figure that out, trying to go down Okay, well, how
can we make it look this way? And it's just
it's just a lot and I think we've tabled it
(07:47):
since we've moved in here. We're going to put it
back on the table again. We were held at two
spots okay, date wise the same dates, but it's just
also those things too. I don't want to inconvenience and
do all that, so we're not canceling. But there's also
a piece of me I'm like, what do I really want?
What does he really want? What do we because I
(08:08):
almost I'm like I want to call him. I cannot
wait to call him my husband, and I want to
call him my husband, like now, well head to the
courthouse for going to the courthouse. I still I want
that one moment and I like was like that I
felt wasn't The first one was whatever, we I didn't
even have a wedding. The second, you know, the second
one was like whatar wasn't really in it? Third was
like immensumon to me? You know, But I this is
(08:32):
so different. So I would say this from a guest perspective.
I feel like you and I are wired very similar,
so I would worry about the same thing. But I
would tell you like, for me, it is such a
fun excuse to like actually do the things or go
to the places right, Like I'm like trying to do
(08:52):
like castle tours, and like I didn't know how much
we've shared. I can't remember what is on or I
mean it's definitely gonna mean Scotland. So Scotland to me
is like list and I am like, I it is
such I wouldn't. It would probably be years from now
before I would do it. Well, I'll be just as
happy if it's your backyard or your living room. But
I get it. I'm just speaking like at a guest perspective.
(09:13):
Sure it's expensive, but we're getting the heads up. And
also and I'm trying to like plan really cool things
we just can't cover well.
Speaker 1 (09:22):
Think that, like we probably would never do, right, it's
not something that would make it on our you know,
we just probably would never get to that. So it's
something that we would not normally get to do. We
already know, we're already planning it. We're planning on spending
money for that. We can plan with our family that Hey,
we may not take other trips next year or whatever
that is, but like that's our priority.
Speaker 2 (09:43):
So Sanna's getting married again. I wasn't at the other weddings.
This is my first Jane to do it too.
Speaker 1 (09:50):
So Yeaine, right, Yeah, you just don't worry about us.
And in the day, if we can't do it, we.
Speaker 2 (09:58):
Would go, well we'll have a zoom meeting. But that
we can.
Speaker 1 (10:04):
I mean, if we actually could not, like it is
not feasibly possible. We don't have this money in our account.
We can't go. That would be a conversation. It's you know,
I would love to be there, but I can't. But yeah,
we're planning, we're you know, we're fine, we are going
to go.
Speaker 2 (10:18):
Yeah, so that's where we're I think we just need
to you know, and and you know, everything just we
just need I would say, slow and steady. It's been
my latest slogan, and I think you just go one
baby step, no pun intended at a time. Yeah, just
nice and calm. We've got some boxes to unpack. The
good news is all of our unpacking seems to be
(10:38):
physical for once in Jana kramer Land, and that means good,
not emotional unpacking. It feels good emotionally unpacked. Now we
just got to move in with regular cardboard boxes. Different
and it's been great too, like it was. It was.
It was such a different experience with Alan. Yeah, it
felt really like a partner. That's right, a partner, that's right.
(11:01):
It was. It was really it's been really nice. And
homes by the way, Like I know, we all feel
like it has to be done, but it's okay to
just like live in it and a box at a
time like we got time. It's your house forever. Yeah
for sure. I just like things done, should like sit done.
Like is there campaigns that are due too? I thought
about that after you, so you know there's there's things,
(11:23):
but it's all good. It's just the ticking ticking baby. Yeah.
First thing is to get everything ready for babes. Yeah,
but I'm excited, baby, only needs you and dead death.
And this is the first room that was like the
most put together, because that's why Easton's out here, because
I just like, I had a vision and I just
want this to feel safe and comfortable for us girls
(11:47):
and people that come on.
Speaker 1 (11:48):
So I love it.
Speaker 2 (11:48):
It's perfect, it's sunny, and hopefully we'll be able to
fill that seat with some guests in the near future. Yeah,
like real people. I feel like a real adults in here. Yeah,
(12:12):
all right, so let's shift a little Okay, nine two?
And now did you guys watch it?
Speaker 3 (12:18):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (12:18):
You did? Were you not to know? I had the
bed sheets? But of course she did? Dylan forever? Who
is your favorite?
Speaker 3 (12:26):
Uh?
Speaker 2 (12:26):
Dylan? I went between Brandon Walsh and Dylan, but I
stayed mostly with Dylan. It's kind of doesn't that kind
of like that bad boy? Yes, it's just very obvious
early on I had a type. Yeah, And why didn't
I just acknowledge that because my first husband was a Brandon.
I'm in my Dylan era. I mean now too knows iconic? Yeah.
(12:50):
And then so okay, so they have a podcast, So
Brian is I don't think they've ever got married, right,
I don't think.
Speaker 1 (12:57):
So, Yeah, I don't even know if they're engaged. Are
they engaged?
Speaker 2 (13:00):
I think they're just dating. Let's ask them. Well, they're
in the waiting room, so we have a lot of questions.
But before they come on, though, was there anything off limits?
Because I was asking Catherine a question and I was like,
could I say, can I ask them this? But She's like,
it wasn't on them. I don't don't ask us, So
I feel like, is it just I feel like we
(13:20):
always ask what we're not supposed to ask. Well, then
let's get on that case. Welcome to wine, don't hi? Guys, Hello,
I have the exact same is that the thread? But
there's a thread between us, the one in the back,
that same one in my bathroom. I love It's one
(13:40):
of my favorite connects.
Speaker 5 (13:43):
Ye destined to me? Yeah that's from Tracy, my manager.
Speaker 2 (13:49):
Did she send that for you too?
Speaker 3 (13:51):
No choice when Megan and I got got married. But
I think it's with family and and sort of where
we are. It's I I think it's bigger than just
one one single relationship, you know. I think I think
that thread is is interesting. I don't I don't look
(14:13):
at anything as sort of like failing or succeeding. I
look at like things happening at the point when they're
supposed to and for a specific reason. So this, uh,
this thing makes absolute sense in the concept to me,
in my mind of that thread that connects us always
connects us in one way or another.
Speaker 2 (14:32):
So in theory, I absolutely agree agree with you. But
like if I'm like Sharna, that I'd be like, well,
you had that with your.
Speaker 4 (14:38):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (14:38):
If I think if my fiance brought in like to
our new house, like like a frame that like, I
don't know, I'd be like, it's going in.
Speaker 5 (14:51):
You at all.
Speaker 2 (14:53):
Blink twice if that feels true to you, Blink.
Speaker 6 (14:55):
Twice, right will help you?
Speaker 2 (15:00):
No, it will go missing China, no one ever do it.
Speaker 5 (15:04):
I don't know.
Speaker 4 (15:05):
I don't actually feel that way. I haven't felt that
way about a lot of things. There are some things
like for sure, we wanted to refresh furniture over time,
you know, we ended up buying our own home together,
like to start that life. But and I think those
things happen slowly over time. I certainly didn't feel like
everything must go you know what I mean, It's like, no,
we'll do it as we do it as we build
(15:25):
our life. But I love that frame and I love
what it says, and it came from Tracy, who I
also love deeply. She's family to us, and I agree
with Brian. I think that thread still connects them, but
I think there are also many threads that connect all
of us and the people that come in and out
of your life, and so it rings true and it's
still very important, and she's very much a part of
(15:46):
our life. The thread will always be connected because of
the kids, and so we are all family. So there's
no bad feelings there to be like that cannot be
in this house.
Speaker 2 (15:56):
Yeah, that makes sense. It totally makes sense.
Speaker 3 (15:57):
Although Megan is in our home come like when she's
dropping off or picking up sometimes with the kids and
she'll come in for a little bit. Yeah, and she'll
be holding Zane, and it's like we are one big family.
Speaker 4 (16:08):
You know.
Speaker 3 (16:09):
Family defines itself obviously in different ways, but with her,
it's you know, we we do share so much, and
she now shares so much with Sharna, and they have
an amazing, an amazing connection and friendship and mutual respect
for each other.
Speaker 5 (16:27):
I love for each other because of.
Speaker 2 (16:30):
That, and that's so, yeah, that's so important. I mean
it's kind of For example, my ex husband was here
the other day dropping off the kids because he knew
that me and my fiancer are moving into our new house.
And he's like, you know, I'll just come drop the
kids off. And he came in, he had a beer
with Alan, and it was just like I remember sitting
there going, this is really cool, Like.
Speaker 5 (16:47):
This is really nice.
Speaker 2 (16:49):
This is how it I would have I never would
have dreamt it this way, but I like, this is
I go, this is this is cool? You know. And
having said that, though he did want me to get
rid of the match.
Speaker 5 (17:01):
Did he.
Speaker 2 (17:03):
Of course he did. It was so comfortable.
Speaker 6 (17:07):
Yeah you so you bought the exact same one. I
actually just thought I never knowe and you were like,
you typed in the year numberfore it and they sent
an exact duplicate of it.
Speaker 2 (17:21):
Yeah. I actually felt that way about the couch when
I moved into my husband's bachelor pad.
Speaker 6 (17:25):
I thought the count bran.
Speaker 2 (17:32):
True to you. Okay, I saw the uncomfortability. Yeah yeah,
stage get that out. Couch has gotta go.
Speaker 4 (17:40):
Yeah you kidding that couch has gotta go. You're not
watching TV snuggling on that.
Speaker 2 (17:46):
Couch that hasn't been much snuggling before. I'm sure anyway, Yeah, wait,
you guys met it? Did I read it? At a
coffee shop? Yeah?
Speaker 4 (17:55):
Yeah, so we met at a coffee shop. It was
set up basically by our mutual business manager, which is
crazy that you know, she's not she's great with your finances,
but she's not really a matchmaker, so it was such
a weird request when she individually spoke to both of
us about needing to meet this client of pose. And yeah,
we met at Pedla's book in in Calabasas, and we
(18:17):
were just going to meet for coffee, for breakfast and
talk about a show that he was going to be on,
Mass Dancer, try and make it like not necessarily a
heavy date vibe, but could talk about dance kind of
work vibe. But we ended up sitting and talking for
five hours.
Speaker 3 (18:32):
Even though even though Mass Dancer had for the most
part nothing to do with professional dancing, so there was there.
Speaker 5 (18:39):
It was it was sort.
Speaker 3 (18:41):
Of like, here's something to fall back on in case
you guys have nothing else to talk about.
Speaker 5 (18:45):
But when I heard you know.
Speaker 3 (18:48):
You guys can talk about dancing, I was like, what form.
Speaker 5 (18:52):
Of dancing, you know, like I artistic expression within dancing.
I don't. I don't totally get it.
Speaker 4 (18:58):
Yeah, does I say? We didn't talk about any dancing.
We just talked about life and lots of different things,
and it was really easy and wonderful and it just
felt good. It felt very comfortable and like we'd almost
done it so many times before. And so we continued
to meet for coffees and breakfast very casually, you know,
(19:18):
as Bryce said before. No, it wasn't a hair and
makeup done where your best outfit or you know, be
on your your best for that person. It was just
turning up sort of was who we are, very authentically.
And yeah, we did that for like five times, and
then we kissed for the first time, and then then.
Speaker 2 (19:36):
Then we went to the couch, and then.
Speaker 4 (19:38):
Then we went to the couch. We definitely went to
the bed. Actually by date six.
Speaker 3 (19:43):
It's it's yeah on on a clean new mattress, so
you should feel get it out down.
Speaker 5 (19:55):
And then uh yeah, yeah.
Speaker 4 (19:58):
Then the rest is history, and the rest is then we
end up making a baby, right, we have a fifteen
month old?
Speaker 2 (20:04):
Are you guys, because you're you're just are you going
to are you going to get married? Like what are
you just kind of like whatever with it?
Speaker 4 (20:10):
No, we talk about it all the time, but for
sure will I think we don't feel the need to
rush it at all. You know, we know where in
this this is endgame. We are so blended at the
you know, our family, the kids, everything feels perfect, and
we don't feel the need to rush getting married or
making it official because to us, we already are.
Speaker 3 (20:31):
Yeah, honestly, honestly, making it official at this point is
uh is more for everyone else that's around that is
not part of the family and not in the house.
Speaker 5 (20:40):
Yeah, but we we absolutely live an act like this
is this is it, which which truthfully.
Speaker 4 (20:48):
Is so we do talk about We've talked about what
kind of weddings we like and the way that we
do things or you know, we have those conversations. It's
definitely not like a secret and I you know that
we want to do that with each other. But life
is so very very full with full kids in the house,
and we'll get there when we get there.
Speaker 2 (21:05):
Of course. I kind of like, you know, I'm trying
to like figure that piece out right now too. And
it's like when you have a baby, like I'm we're
about to have a baby, and it's like after that,
it's like we're together. Like it doesn't really like matter,
like it's just I know, he's my person. I'm going
to be with him. And it's like, I mean, we
haven't even gone on vacation together. Well we kind of
skipped all the all the part we did reverse dating
(21:26):
as well, so but it's like it's okay.
Speaker 5 (21:30):
That's what you get. I mean, I got a jump
in first on a new mattress purchase.
Speaker 2 (21:36):
We bought a couch, and then we had three kids,
so that just ths quick. You know, whose idea was
it to do the podcast?
Speaker 4 (21:43):
It was actually Brian and Randy.
Speaker 3 (21:44):
They were talking and Brian, you would be better at
telling this story. Yeah, So I I was doing a
podcast before that was much more like a sort of fun.
There wasn't We didn't really have plan as such. We
my my podcast partner lived in Mississippi, so we sort
(22:07):
of had this thing where we would uh call each
other on Skype or on Zoom and then we would
record for an hour and it was basically just kind
of catching up with each other's lives. But I gotten
to a point where I was really after everything that
was happening in my life. I felt like Sean and I,
I know, when we get into conversations with other people
(22:28):
on their podcasts or in whatever form, we very much
enjoy talking about life and what we've learned and lessons
that are out there and sharing sharing things that we've experienced.
Speaker 5 (22:44):
And so I did.
Speaker 3 (22:46):
Uh. There was a there was a radio show called
Loveline when I was a kid here in Los Angeles.
It was on k Rock, and I did about a
dozen of them, honestly because the k Rock studios were
so close to my house so I could get there
in like five minutes. So they would just reached out
to me and be like, hey, you want to come by,
and so I would. And it was Doctor Drew. Adam
(23:08):
Carolla was on it, but before Adam, this guy poor
Man was on, and the show was basically that we
would talk about things and then they would have callers
and people sort of email. It wasn't even email. They
would they would fact, they would fax in questions and
we would read them on the show. And so I
(23:29):
had this random idea one night of like God, it'd
be really fun in this new medium to do something
similar to that, and I had been following Randy for
a while on Instagram and I know that he's he's
been a professional life coach for the past fifteen years.
Speaker 5 (23:47):
So I reached out to.
Speaker 3 (23:49):
Him initially and I was like, hey, you know, we
hadn't we hadn't talked in fifteen plus years, and so
I said, hey, how's everything going. You know, I've been
following your your your Instagram account, and I was thinking
about a podcast and I think that you and I
could do something really interesting, and so he was into it.
(24:10):
And then I had spoken to Sharna about it. She
was like, God, I would really love to be a
part of a podcast like that. And so then when
I when I talked to Amy u b at iHeart.
Speaker 5 (24:23):
She said to me, she was like yeah.
Speaker 3 (24:25):
She was like, oh, well, would Sharna like to be
on this podcast with you and Randy as well? And
I was like, you know, funny enough, we spoke about
it like two nights ago, and she was saying how
much she would love to do something like this. So
I think, without question, did you just leave me?
Speaker 2 (24:41):
She just left me, That's that's fine.
Speaker 3 (24:46):
So uh so I ended up sitting down with her
and I was, oh, Look who's back.
Speaker 4 (24:51):
I deeply disagree.
Speaker 5 (24:52):
Look who decided? Look who decided to show?
Speaker 2 (24:55):
Is that her signal for your getting long winded or something?
Is that what that was?
Speaker 4 (24:58):
Apparently I'm gonna go say quick, I'm going to go
get a coffee.
Speaker 5 (25:10):
Minutes are you done yet?
Speaker 3 (25:16):
So then we, uh, the three of us ended up
talking and then we're on very similar paths and so
that that's sort of what the podcast has come out of.
Speaker 5 (25:27):
So enough of me talking now.
Speaker 2 (25:30):
I'm curious though, like, is there anything off limits that
you're like, listen, We're not going to go there, because
I know there's things that like when I did my
podcast with Max husband, I wish we could go back
and go man, I wish we didn't share certain things
because the media just runs with things, and then then
you feel like you have to why I did. I
feel like I had to then over explain it, or
(25:51):
not over explain it, but just kind of defend it maybe.
And then there were certain things too. We were still
going through things while sharing an open wound, and it's
like that wasn't healthy for us as a couple.
Speaker 4 (26:00):
Yeah, I can't imagine that that would be healthy. We
haven't really had like a boundaries conversation. I feel like
we're very open transparent people, but we haven't had anything
come up for us that feels like that doesn't feel
good to share.
Speaker 5 (26:13):
You know.
Speaker 4 (26:14):
Our most recent episode was on co parenting, and obviously
there's always going to be things you choose not to
share because some things should stay in that personal space
and they involve other people. But I think we very
openly shared what our experiences are, and always with that
intention of love and kindness and not trying to ever
take other people down or make things more dramatic.
Speaker 5 (26:36):
Than they are.
Speaker 4 (26:37):
But I don't think anything has come up for us
that feels like I don't feel comfortable sharing that.
Speaker 3 (26:44):
I feel like with a podcast like we're doing, it's
incredibly it's invaluable really for us to be as open
and honest about.
Speaker 5 (26:56):
Our life and what's going on.
Speaker 3 (26:58):
I think I think we just naturally will not get
into the weeds on things that we don't want to share,
but we take absolute ownership of what it is we
do share, so then if the media reports on it afterwards,
I don't necessarily feel a need to then defend what
I said because I said it, and I said it
(27:20):
for the purpose of feeling like it was okay to
share at that time. So I sort of feel like
we share what it is we share, media picks it up,
they say whatever they say about it, and then it
sort of goes away because then our next episode comes, yeah,
and we're onto a new topic. And honestly, the media
is going to have a field day with all of
(27:40):
the stuff. I'm sure we're going to end up talking about.
But that's just part of the world we live in
and part of what it is we do that's not the.
Speaker 4 (27:48):
Hot pot of it is that vulnerable share, Like you know,
I recently shared even two of the episodes we did,
that just gets made into clickbait headlines and it's a
it's a it's a headline, and then it's an edited
trend script and you're taking out specific words or lines
and you don't have the tone in there, and it
can be read a completely different way. And that's hard
that I've had that realization of like, oh my gosh,
(28:10):
anything I say ken and will be used in a
public platform. But again, I know what I said, I
speak very clearly, and I know my intention behind it,
and anyone that truly wants to know the real story
can always come and listen to it to actually understand.
But we will never just from simply being in the
public eye, whether we do it on a podcast or
(28:31):
an interview or people photograph us somewhere else. We're never
going to get out of that part of life where
people are going to fill the gaps with their own
story and their own narrative. Oh they're not holding hands,
or they're not looking at each other or whatever it is.
Someone's always going to make drama out of nothing, or
make it bigger than what it is at the very least.
And so I think that's just part of accepting that
(28:52):
we are we're on this journey. We've said we want
to be transparent and vulnerable and share, and that is
going to come with That opens up to people having
an opinion and filling it with their own experiences and narrative,
and we've got to be okay with that. But if
what we are talking about helps a few people, then
they can relate to it, or it's a source of
inspirational motivation for them, then that's awesome too. And we're
(29:17):
never going to have one without the other. That is
the balance of life. That is the ying and Yang,
and so we have to accept that all of those
things can and will happen.
Speaker 2 (29:38):
So for people that are listening, Alsh is the name
of the podcast, which I can really relate to. I
just I'm turning forty two in a couple of months.
It feels very accurate. Grew up watching you, which matters,
you know, Like this is it's a really cool. It's
just really neat to watch people that we grew up
with actually get vulnerable and talk about real life a bit.
So it's the two of you Randy Spelling, which is
(30:00):
pretty dynamite trio. So what can what can they expect
when they tune in to listen to Oldish? Like what
is is there one I guess one demographic of a
person that you're you think of when you're speaking, is
it what's your main goal in doing it?
Speaker 4 (30:14):
No?
Speaker 3 (30:14):
Are for me personally, there is no demographic. I feel
like the things that we are talking about, we're we're
only sharing our perspective, which is an Oldish perspective. We
we have gone the full distance with some of these things,
and we have we have experienced hard situations and we've
(30:35):
come out the back end of it. And so for
us to then share with people what the entire experience was.
I think makes makes it easier for some people that
are just newly in something to realize like, oh, there
is an end to this, Like this doesn't as much
as this feels like this is an end all situation
(30:57):
and I'm just going to give up and I don't
know what to do. They realize from the from the
stories that we're sharing and what it is we've experienced
that the problems in life aren't They are much more
common than people would realize, and there is a beginning, middle,
(31:18):
and the possible end for these things. So you kind
of have to open your eyes a bit more and
see that. And I think if we can help people
of all ages deal with that, then we can't. The
only thing that's put us, I think, in this space
is the fact that we are oldish, that we have
gone we've lived as much life as we've had, and
(31:39):
we've come out the back end of it. Randy same thing.
He has lived so much life. He's now a life coach.
Like he's he's able to help people from experience in
dealing with things, not just in a sense of like
he reads books and so he knows what to say
he can really ask those questions because he asked them
(32:03):
of himself.
Speaker 4 (32:04):
Yeah, which is really cool. And like, as far as
the name goes, oldish doesn't mean even a number. I
think in your twenties you can feel oldish in comparison
to where you've come from, or it's a part of
your life. Maybe for those in their twenties that already
have three kids, you know, and they're living that experience,
it's age again. Oldish again. It's not a number. It
is a moment where you are have reached in your
(32:26):
life and what you've got in front of you. It's
the things that you're facing, which is the stuff that
we talk about. I think, you know, people in the
twenties can listen to us and have questions about disappointment
or we're talking about addiction this week, and relate to
them and maybe find some really great advice from people
that have been through stuff and found their way to
that ending that Brian is talking about. So every week
(32:48):
we do an episode, we pick a subject and we
talk about it, and then we follow up with questions
that fans have sent in that week with our second
episode and have live people people call in live and
I think that's a really cool element, like the love
line thing, that we get to speak to people and
they can air their concerns and situations with us and
(33:08):
chat to people that they probably never thought went through
things like this and find a commonality and find almost
community within what they're going through and experiencing and not
feeling alone, because I think there is also so much
power in that and feeling support and finding a commonality
with people.
Speaker 2 (33:26):
The connection piece is really important.
Speaker 4 (33:28):
That.
Speaker 2 (33:29):
Yeah, the being able to call in. I mean I
can imagine sometimes when you're listening you find that great
deal of comfort, and I know, like we've shared here,
there's sometimes I leave the podcast and I'm like vulnerability
hangover I said too much. I can almost feel it.
I'm like, oh, it's al so good in the minute,
and now I'm like, do I need to call a
couple of people and let them know or But I
(33:49):
do think when they get to call and actually talk
to you, that's like a really important piece. That's the
old school radio piece I think we all miss totally. Yeah,
it's a real human connection. Yeah, yeah, it's called connection
and we need it.
Speaker 3 (34:02):
Yeah, It's it's amazing because then you have these real
genuine conversations with people. There there's so many times where
I hear somebody speak and one of the things in
my mind is a question will pop up right away
and you're like, God, I wonder what this experience was like.
And so for people then to be able to call
in or send in questions and get answers to those
(34:25):
burning things that pop into their mind while they're listening
to an episode is really fun. I mean, what we
do is really has been really fun so far, doing
these follow up episodes the same the same week and
getting and really finishing these discussions for the week not
finished for I mean, honestly, we may revisit topics a
(34:49):
dozen times within the lifetime we.
Speaker 6 (34:51):
Talked about me.
Speaker 2 (34:53):
Yeah, we revisit Brian. For you, though, what is what
is something that's a common thread like that you could
that you are feel like you always not always struggle with,
but it has been a struggle for you in your past,
and that's something that you have to continue to work on.
That you might that that that you might share on
the podcast. We know you're not good at dancing.
Speaker 5 (35:21):
I'm gonna go get water real fast.
Speaker 3 (35:27):
I think the thing that I'm always uh pushing myself
being is recognizing like my authentic feelings in a moment.
Speaker 5 (35:41):
And and then.
Speaker 3 (35:43):
Talking myself through those and sharing those. I so much
of the time when I was younger in life, I
would have these feelings and then automatically you kind of
go to this place in your mind of judging those
feelings and is it appropriate for me to be feeling
this way. Oh I should hide the fact that I'm
feeling that way, or oh it's you. You end up
(36:05):
with all these like dirty little secrets because you're not.
Speaker 2 (36:08):
I feel like anxiety too. That might stem like.
Speaker 3 (36:11):
Yeah, it it affects everything across the board. Yeah, you start.
I would start feeling anxiety in all sorts of ways.
I would feel anxiety. If I would be walking into
a Starbucks and ordering a drink. I didn't want to
look the person uh behind the counter in the eyes
because I thought right away, oh, my god, they're judging me,
or they're judging something I did, or And and it
(36:32):
was because I wasn't I hadn't really been authentic with
myself in dealing with those and figuring out what it
is that was going on and what I was feeling
insecure about and why and as soon as I as
soon as I did, and as soon as I started
conversing with people around me, it's amazing how many similarities
(36:54):
there were. And and then you start going to Starbucks
and realizing like, oh my god, the guy behind the
counter has just as much, if not more, going on
in his life than I do. So the last thing
that he's thinking is, oh, it's this guy, and oh boy,
the last project he did, but.
Speaker 5 (37:11):
He could care less and he's.
Speaker 3 (37:13):
You know, nine times out of ten, he's much more
judgmental of himself of like, oh my god, it's this
guy and I'm standing behind the counter in a Starbucks
and this is not where I want to be in
my life.
Speaker 5 (37:22):
And so what you start.
Speaker 3 (37:26):
I'm constantly trying to find the commonalities in my life
with other people that are around me and create as
much of a sense of belonging as possible, and sort
of you build that core that tribe around you. And
(37:47):
I find the more that I do that, the bigger
that tribe gets. The more I share, the more people
feel like they have things in common with me, and
they realize that they do. And then I'm not on
an island of one, you know.
Speaker 2 (38:05):
Yeah, Well, then you have people that will lean in.
And I feel like Sharna is the best partner because
she's a very friendly You lean in, You're always so
kind and nice, and you wanted to have the conversations right,
and you wanted to be are you okay? And you
genuinely care about other people. So to have that person
in your life too, when you're going through anxiety or
(38:27):
whatever you're feeling, to have someone that actually listens to
you and that makes you and not make you feel
crazy for whatever your feeling or thinking about.
Speaker 4 (38:34):
Yeah, I think that's true for both of us, though
you know, I've had my own share of anxiety and insecurities.
Definitely went through my space of not knowing how to
voice my feelings or my wants and needs.
Speaker 2 (38:48):
In this relationship and before or just not with.
Speaker 4 (38:51):
Brian in the all the work that I trade off
to my previous relationships. But it's still every now. Even
though Brian is a amazing listener and a wonderful supporter
and partner and we do life really well together, my
things can still come up every now and then if
I'm not staying on top of them and on top
of you know, watching my own self talk or making
(39:13):
sure that I'm honoring my wants and needs, or taking
time for me to recharge, like all these things that
I know that help me be my best and communicate
my best. But what is so incredible is because we
are so transparent with each other and have those wonderful conversations,
the hard conversations. I can go to him and say,
I am feeling completely depleted and oversensitive and I just
(39:36):
need I just need a day or two and I
need to do this, and he can help me stay
accountable for that for myself, and it's really wonderful. If
he's feeling some type of way, I can always check
in with him and say, hey, here's this going on,
or I'm feeling this coming from you, where are you at?
And we have really amazing check ins with each other
instead of feeling reactive to what the other person's going
(39:59):
for Because certainly, when I'm feeling depleted and over sensitive,
like hyper sensitive, I can come off as a dick,
you know what I mean. I can my energy can
just feel wrong because I'm again, I'm just reactive to things.
I've got nothing left.
Speaker 2 (40:13):
And it's not I mean, that's me, that's me too,
That's like, yeah, yeah, I mean, and it's nothing, it's
no reflection, you know, to Bri like you're not meaning
for And I literally just had this conversation with Alan
before we moved into the house. I'm like, I know
we haven't done this yet. I was like, can we
do a check in because I was like, I'm just
gonna I need to just kind of tell you, like
I needed to affirm him how amazing he's been and
(40:35):
just you know how incredible he is. But also like
I know how I get in stressful situations, I lash
out at the ones closest to me, And I was like,
and I don't want to do that and be like
for you to be on the receiving end. So if
almost you can help me, like and just kind of
like if you can see like an hour, I'm gonna
come grab your hand and you're gonna know that this
(40:56):
means I just need to take a breath with you
and just like yeah, because I don't don't want to
be hurtful with my works. I don't mean to be
to that person, you know.
Speaker 4 (41:05):
Yes, yes, absolutely, I think it's so important to open
up that conversation, and truly, I think everyone wants to
have that conversation. You just don't feel safe or confident
in approaching it right because by doing that, you are
airing some of your own feelings in dirty laundry, maybe
that you're still trying to not really dirty laundry, but feelings,
(41:26):
feelings and insecurities right that you're still working through and
to show those to your partner. I think, no matter
how long you've been together, if you're not in the
practice of sharing those things, it can be really hard.
But it is one of the most beautiful helpful things
in a relationship. That and also I think acknowledging and
this is something that we do but still are working on,
is when you are listening to that other person, it's
(41:48):
really helpful to ask how would you like me to
best be for you in this situation? Would you like
me to help you through it and help you find
a solution, or would you like me to just listen?
Is also a really big thing when you're sharing. Sometimes
you just need to share and don't give me solutions yet.
I'm not ready to hear how to fix it. I
just want to share it with you so you can
(42:09):
be just in this boat with me for a second,
or on this island with me for a second, because
I feel like I'm on my arm.
Speaker 3 (42:14):
The practice that we've learned that we've been really trying
to implement is is the concept of when somebody is
going through something and they just need to speak and
they need to talk to you about stuff, to then
reiterate what it is you heard so they hear it
and they know whether you.
Speaker 5 (42:34):
Actually heard correctly or not.
Speaker 3 (42:36):
It's really important because sometimes you'll say all of these
things and then the other person just just didn't really
ingest what it is you said. So it's good to know, like, okay,
So not only am I going to share with you
what's going on, but we're then going to share the
concept of okay, so what is it that you heard?
(42:58):
What I heard you say? Is you need more time
with this, or you feel this way, or or I
made you feel this way in life. So you kind
of create this, You create this sort of bond in
speaking and listening to each other, which is the two
go hand in hand, and it's really important to build
the skills in both. I think it's important too for
(43:21):
people to realize that somebody that is further along that
path and better at some things than others they're they're
not just better people. Like everybody is constantly growing, everybody
is constantly building new skills and practicing new things. We
(43:41):
have just as many issues come up, we just through repetition,
have gotten better at working through things. But that's all
it is. It's not necessarily that somebody is more elevated
than another. You learn these tools and these tricks and
these things that you can use to help you communicate
(44:02):
better with the people that are around you. Yeah, listen better,
be be kinder, be more empathetic, and they're they're all
of these things that you honestly gain just in doing it.
Speaker 5 (44:15):
It just living life.
Speaker 3 (44:17):
So you know, be be kind to yourself as you're
going through this experience. Be be okay with the fact
that you're not great at things right away that nobody is.
Speaker 5 (44:30):
It takes practice.
Speaker 3 (44:31):
Just like when you were young and you were in
math class or science class or history class. Communication with
people is not something that that you learn readily at
home when you're younger, and so so it's okay to
then learn at a later age, but at least you're
open to learning. So it's like, yeah, you grow with
(44:52):
the people that are around you. Find people that are
on that similar path as you and are willing to
do that work with you and and then you grow
together and it can be it can create these bonds
with people that are that are just amazing and so
much deeper than you ever knew it was possible.
Speaker 2 (45:22):
I mean, I even feel that for the women that
are with me here, I feel like we're so honest.
I feel like we even when we don't really want
to talk about things, we still talk about things. Are
we going to cry? No, okay, just check it out,
all right. It's just hard to the that's the hard
part for me. Well, like if there's a problem, he
always is like, I'm like, I just need you to
listen to me. I was like, and just to hear me.
(45:43):
You did nothing wrong. I'm just but he was like,
you know, always trying to fix.
Speaker 1 (45:47):
Yeah, And that's usually a man thing too, And I
think it's a lot of me and you because of
like work. I'm like, okay, so how do we fix this?
Speaker 2 (45:54):
Like what?
Speaker 1 (45:54):
And then I'm like, okay, wait, she really just needs
to sit with this for a minute.
Speaker 2 (45:58):
So I've tried to do better at that.
Speaker 5 (46:02):
Fixing.
Speaker 3 (46:03):
It's and a lot of times people the fixing that
is done is done internally with that person. Sometimes they
just needed to be heard and they just needed to
express and they need to hear it out loud, and
they needed to know that no matter what it is
they were thinking or feeling or how outrageous it felt,
that they're still loved as they're feeling that. So then
(46:25):
so then it sort of takes the sting out of it,
and you don't feel like such a freak in feeling
something in the first place. You feel like, oh god,
I could I had a terrible day, but I'm still
loved by the people that are around me. I was
able to share that, and I wasn't frowned upon it
was I shared that in a safe place and I'm
still absolutely loved and we were able to laugh afterwards
(46:48):
and have a drink or have dinner, or we continue
to be ourselves and you grow. You grow with that experience.
That one experience leads to another one because you felt
comfortable in doing it, and then you start feeling more
and more comfortable with the people that are around you
that listen and accept you for who you are.
Speaker 4 (47:07):
I think the fixing thing I relate to because that
was me I grew up wanting to fix things, fixed relationships,
fix people. It was just to came from my childhood
and the things that are you know, the programming, right,
but the learning that it is not my job to
fix other people. It's not and it's not fair for
me to take that from them to fix their things
(47:28):
or to push it on them. I can ask them
in that conversation, how can I be how can I
be your best friend in this? Would you like me
to listen or help you fix it? But it is
not for me to take that from them. To help
them fix it, that is their journey to figure out
and I can of course be support in that, but
it is not for me to push that on them.
And so that's a really big that was a really
(47:50):
big thing for me to learn. And also fixing up
people's things was a way for me to deflect and
not look at myself, right, So that's there's also that
there's layers to it for me. But yeah, yeah, the
wanting to fix a problem is I totally get you,
I totally get you, like, but I can I can
help with this, but really it's not about you. It's
about them and them getting to it on their own time, right, And.
Speaker 2 (48:12):
That's good messages for kids too. You know, I'm sure
that's how really, you know sure, it's like you want
to fix your kid's heartbreak from not being able to
have his first kiss. I'm like, oh yeah, I mean
that's that's a still example. But you know what I mean, Like,
I'm sure, because what's how what's the oldest for you guys.
Speaker 5 (48:28):
Twenty one and then the youngest is fifteen months?
Speaker 2 (48:31):
Okay, yeah, but.
Speaker 4 (48:32):
In the home, wak in the home cash is road
is living his best life. So we have eleven, nine,
seven and fifteen months in the house.
Speaker 2 (48:42):
You know, I was I was angry as a parent
for you when I saw that stuff that hit on
you know, the stupid tabloids and stuff. And I'm like,
for me, that's that's my hardest piece. Like when someone
because when someone comes after my kids, that's where I
have an issue. Like that's where it's like.
Speaker 5 (48:58):
Oh yeah, when someone is yeah.
Speaker 2 (49:01):
Yeah, I'm like whether they did or didn't, who sing cares,
you know what I mean, Like, just let them be, like,
let them parent how they want a parent. Like I
just it sent me like I was so angry because
I'm like, again, I can look at the stories now
that they pick up and I'm like, yeah, okay, whatever,
Like they hate me, they hate me, it's fine, but
(49:22):
like when it comes to my kids, I'm like, don't
go there, Like and were then attacking your your parenting
where it's like you don't know the truth this this
random nanny that was that a thing might have you know,
I'm like, who like it? Just I hated every piece
of that article. I know you ended up I think
tweeting something, but I was just like, that's that's hard.
And then it's also probably hard for them too as
(49:42):
they're getting older, you know, be like, what the heck?
Speaker 4 (49:45):
And then what's so hot about it is? Because it's
so public and those things live forever, and one day
these kids are guard to they don't right now have
access to the internet and be able to probably have
be one day and searched inding and see what comes up.
And I hate that that exists. I hate that one
day they're going to see these things because none of
(50:07):
it's real or fair. It's just made up for a
clickbait headline for people to get on and push their
own agenda of whatever they feel like, and it's all
just fluff and bullshit. But it's hurtful to kids. You know,
as adults, we can go they hate me whatever, I
don't care. But they're going to grow up and be
very vulnerable at some point in their life and these
things that they're going to read may negatively affect them
(50:28):
and that really sucks.
Speaker 2 (50:30):
Well, it really works you guys as parents, and you know,
the co parenting side to you, guys will be able
to share your wisdom, everything that you've learned as well,
you know, And that's that's how it's tough.
Speaker 5 (50:42):
We try.
Speaker 3 (50:43):
I mean, that's that's the purpose of what it is
we're doing now. And honestly, I find genuine joy.
Speaker 5 (50:49):
In doing it.
Speaker 3 (50:50):
When when we get to the end of an episode
somebody has called in live with things to talk about
and concerns and things they're dealing with, and we've been
able to help them at all.
Speaker 5 (51:00):
It just feels amazing. That's that.
Speaker 3 (51:04):
I love the feeling of sharing, sharing things that I've
learned and it possibly helping anyone. I mean, we are
in this crazy, crazy situation where.
Speaker 5 (51:20):
The media does.
Speaker 3 (51:22):
They do turn their eyes towards what it is we're
going through and they report on it, and so we
have this strange soapbox that that that we can use
for good or just for for gossip and personal personal reasons.
(51:42):
And I love the feeling of, oh, we're trying to
use it for as much good as we possibly can.
I've learned way more in life from my failures than
I have for my successes, and so I think it's
important to keep that in mind with people and help
them understand that, like, what what it is you're going
through right now is hard, but it's these hard things
(52:06):
that you're going to look back on in life and
you're going to realize these are the things that created
who I am today.
Speaker 5 (52:12):
Successes are easy.
Speaker 3 (52:13):
You stumble into them, you go, oh my god, I
can't believe it's going so well, and you learn nothing
from it. You just continue to do what it is
you're doing. It's the stumbles that you have in life
that force you to look down and realize, like, Okay,
what did I trip on in the first place?
Speaker 5 (52:28):
What's going on? What can I change?
Speaker 3 (52:30):
We're different shoes, you know, there are different ways of
dealing with things, and it's those it's those experiences that
create that that movement and that change.
Speaker 2 (52:40):
Yeah. I love that. Well, I'm excited to listen to
the podcast. It's on iHeartRadio, so you know, got to
support the whole team. But how to listen to Oldish
on iHeartRadio with Sharna, Brian and Randy. Thank you guys
so much for coming on the show. Appreciate it.
Speaker 5 (52:54):
Thank you guys. Bye.
Speaker 2 (52:57):
It's nice to see couples that I like, been through it,
go through it and like continue to work on things together.
That makes sense. Like yes, it's like they both obviously
have their things that come up from past, like we
all do, but how they seem to at least communicate
to each other is beautiful and I feel like that
(53:18):
comes with age too, Like how I was saying some
of the things like the check ins with Alan, you
know that I don't. I know, I don't want to
repeat things from my past, so I have to check myself.
I've been checking myself a lot lately, have you. Yeah,
well even till Jana. We walked the other day and
she said, how are things with you? Impressed? And I said,
actually good because I think I go to him first,
(53:40):
which is so silly, but I caught. I got caught
in this. Like even just to pray about it first
is great, and I'll still do that, but there are
times where I'm just like God moves the pieces, or
I would save all my things and come into therapy
with like the laundry list, and instead I'm just like
I've I'm finding better times to maybe say it for
both of us where we can both hear it, because
(54:01):
that's been an issue before. I'm so like I either
fly off the handle or bury it all or nothing.
But I do a lot of what they're saying and
have said. It resonates with me a lot, just the
turning towards each other, the vulnerability. I don't like to
be vulnerable, so that's why I usually am like a
little bag razor blades and I don't go to him first. Yeah.
Is there one thing that your partner though I don't
(54:22):
know that does though that you guys, it's like the
little thing so this is let's just be silly little
that you're just like this annoys me about you popcorn
so fat? Oh definitely it's the.
Speaker 1 (54:34):
One thing talked about this because I'm scared to eat
around you.
Speaker 2 (54:38):
Because he chomps. She just doesn't.
Speaker 1 (54:41):
Yeah, when we were out on wind down.
Speaker 2 (54:45):
That's right because people chewing hmm, to chew hard for
me and chumps and then are you like are you
does he? I know I feel it down my spine
while we talk about it. It's not his fault, he's
just being a human. I can't do it though.
Speaker 1 (55:00):
Katin uh, probably just like remembering things or like asking
like what are we doing? I don't know, look at
the calendar, you know, like that just drives me crazy.
Speaker 2 (55:09):
Well, you, is there a reason you brought to go?
It's just funny because again I love Alan listen, we
love him so much. But I think there was one
thing that happened like last week where I was just like, oh,
this is cute, like because it's it where you like
(55:33):
there it is, there it is, but it's like the
silliest thing. Okay, Like I don't want to go shopping
with him anymore. Oh tell me? Like he tries everything on.
This is why they took attendance away from the dressing rooms,
(55:54):
because no one needs to tried it on it like
a dicks. No.
Speaker 1 (55:59):
I do have my kids try stuff on a Dix.
But it's very annoying.
Speaker 2 (56:02):
Because your kids, because they're growing.
Speaker 1 (56:06):
One door, you got to go find someone to go
open it.
Speaker 2 (56:08):
Like how many times have you worn Nike and Adidas
in your life. Yeah, But I'm just like, I mean,
we're just going I thought we were just going in,
Like know what were we going in for? I can't
even remember. Oh, because he had to he flew back
because what he was dealing with the piece of stuff
or whatever, and so he wanted to get some more
(56:29):
like running shorts or whatever, and so I'm just thinking
and we had somewhere to go after that too, so
we had like a thirty minute window, well like forty
five minutes to an hour. I'm like, how are we
still in Dicks?
Speaker 4 (56:41):
You know?
Speaker 2 (56:42):
But I'm just trying to be like, hey, babe, like
where are you a He's like, I'm in the dressing room.
And I was like it took I mean, I didn't
say anything, but I was like, oh my god, I
never want to go shopping with Did you stay in
the car? Were you inside?
Speaker 4 (56:53):
Well?
Speaker 2 (56:54):
At first, I was like, I'm going to go to
the car because it was taking a minute, and I
was just like I could I know, I was like
I don't want to. Yeah, Like, but they're wearing hard
I'm like, what the hell is he doing in there?
Like has there been a robbery? Can I get a
well check that something about it? And he's in the
dressing room like trying to find like Alan a little
mark polo with the Scottish guy, and then like he
(57:16):
goes to the shoes. Actually, no, we gotta go come on. Yeah,
I can you imagine if Cinderella popped off his little
man slipper and we went through that. It's just so
funny because I haven't like everything I've done that he's
done has been like so cute, not this one, you know,
And so I was just like, I think he says
he's going to go shopping. Yeah, he's so he's way
more stylish than I am. Like, well, he's just very
(57:37):
I what I've gained from my time with Alan is
he's a pretty thorough and intentional guy.
Speaker 3 (57:41):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (57:42):
Is His pace seems not rushed ever, never rushed, never
ever rushed.
Speaker 4 (57:48):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (57:48):
And I'm like, let's go go, go, go, go, go,
go go go. Yeah. And I'm learning to slow down
with him. But I think that's actually like his the
culture over there is so much slower and calmer and
content and right and all so like now, like when
he goes to like the gros Strum, like have a
great time, and I know I'll see him like an
hour and a half, you know, like that, like I
just won't go now, yeah, yeah, I don't go because
(58:12):
I'm like, this is but yeah. So it was just
funny because I was I was chuckling to myself and
I was just there it is. There's nothing again, nothing bad.
It was just that that first thing that I was like, oh, yeah,
now I know. Yeah, I gotta tell you I have
zero interest in ever being in my underwear under those
lights ever again. Ever, well, I think it might be
a female thing too, but maybe so I don't like yeah,
(58:34):
but anyways, sorry tangent. I just had to that's very interesting.
Did Well, this has been fun. We'll see you next week,
ya I
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