March 17, 2025 • 51 mins
How do you handle lies from your kids?? Jana opens up about struggling with disciplining her kids after catching them in a lie, and we try to find the best way to teach children the importance of being honest.
We get an update on Jana’s therapy journey, and she discusses the boundaries that have been set with her ex-husband.
Plus, are you watching Paradise on Netflix?? Jana and the girls are ready to break down every twist and turn!
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Wind Down with Janet Kramer and I'm Heart Radio Podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
Okay, I just I need to recap this really fast. Catherine.
Did you watch Paradise the end of it?
Speaker 3 (00:11):
Oh my god? Have we talked about this yet?
Speaker 4 (00:13):
Well, we talked, we like briefly talked about it and
then then the season finale, but we haven't talked about
season finale.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
Have you watched Paradise?
Speaker 1 (00:21):
Oh my god, Oh my god. I literally do And
I was like, wait, have we talked about this? Are
you watching the show? This is insane? This is our text,
like we die over.
Speaker 3 (00:30):
What is Paradise?
Speaker 2 (00:32):
It's so good? I think you would like it? Is
it real or fake?
Speaker 4 (00:35):
But I think there's another show that you would love
that I just finished on Netflix. It is amazing.
Speaker 3 (00:40):
What is it?
Speaker 2 (00:41):
We'll go back to Paradise. It's called Running Point.
Speaker 3 (00:44):
We just started it.
Speaker 2 (00:45):
It's so funny. I don't did you.
Speaker 3 (00:49):
Like Ted Lassokat, No, visit a comedy?
Speaker 2 (00:51):
You would not like it?
Speaker 3 (00:51):
Okay, I'm not punning on Maybe try it.
Speaker 4 (00:53):
Kate Hadson, she she's so would like it. She's not
if I love that show so much?
Speaker 2 (01:00):
Okay?
Speaker 5 (01:00):
Good?
Speaker 3 (01:01):
We are like two episodes in.
Speaker 4 (01:02):
It's like Ted Lasso meets How to Lose a Guy
in Ten Days and it's so good. Even Alan was laughing.
It's so funny and so good. I am pumped for
season two, like it's one of my favorite shows of
the year, and Paradise.
Speaker 3 (01:15):
Paradise is my favorite.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
One of those dating show.
Speaker 1 (01:20):
It's like a government no oh okay, yeah, yeah, an underworld.
Speaker 4 (01:26):
So it's a show on Hulu and it is something
catastrophic happened. They built this underground city. Here's my question,
do you think there is an underground city that they're
building in preparation for a D Day?
Speaker 2 (01:42):
Cat I'm gonna like cat field it because.
Speaker 4 (01:48):
That's what I asked Alan when we were watching the
season finale, because it got me thinking because they started
to show the D Day event and then you know,
I started to get a little anxious, and then I'm like, Babe,
do you think there's what if that was the underground world?
Speaker 2 (02:02):
He said, probably.
Speaker 1 (02:03):
I I actually don't think that. I think that there is, really,
but I think that there was so much underlying truth
to that show that was unbelievable in different aspects of
government and the elite controlling things and the possibility millionaires
(02:24):
control as like it felt so real and so true,
but not at the same time to me that it
was just it blew my mind? Do I think there
is now? Not necessarily? Do I think if that same
situation happened like it is coming, we know what's happening,
would they maybe? Now?
Speaker 3 (02:44):
Do I think that.
Speaker 2 (02:46):
Sorry, Okay, is Elon Musk the girl in that show?
Speaker 3 (02:51):
I don't know, maybe, but I.
Speaker 2 (02:55):
Do the question, which then made me go, I do think.
Speaker 1 (03:00):
That a lot of those billionaires have their own underground
things already built with a bunkers what's his face? I
think we already know Bill Gates is either Gates or
the other one. I think a lot of them do.
Let me just say, I think a lot of the
people with a lot of money, yes, have underground houses
already like bunkers, without a doubt, Like, I don't doubt
(03:22):
that at all.
Speaker 3 (03:23):
Actually, so I do think that.
Speaker 2 (03:25):
I mean, I was just trying to get a tornado
underground shelter.
Speaker 3 (03:30):
A billions people.
Speaker 2 (03:31):
No, that was five thousand.
Speaker 3 (03:32):
I'm like, my dad's like survive.
Speaker 2 (03:35):
He's like and I'm like, that's five thousand dollars. She's like,
what about the tornado comes?
Speaker 4 (03:39):
I'm like well, I gotta just hope and pray that
our crawl space isn't that funny, because I'm.
Speaker 1 (03:43):
Like, yeah, yeah, guarantee yes. But I mean, if I
had the money, that's probably what I'd spend it on.
Speaker 2 (03:49):
An underground bunker or a shelter.
Speaker 1 (03:51):
Well, we would have a tornado shelter for sure. So absolutely,
do I think Elon is the girl. I think there's
a lot of possibilities for the girl in that show.
I don't know Elon's the right one, but I think
there's a lot of the Sinatra. Oh and then the
guns and like not having control of the guns, like
(04:13):
just so much to this show.
Speaker 3 (04:16):
That could be a possibility that are just am I
going to enjoy this show? I think actually Preston would.
I think Preston would love it, and I think love it.
Speaker 2 (04:25):
Okay, Alan liked it a lot.
Speaker 3 (04:28):
That I loved the acting.
Speaker 1 (04:30):
I I just I loved There has not been a
lot of great TV lately, I'll be honest, but this
was refreshing. It was something I loved to watch.
Speaker 4 (04:37):
I loved it so good, okay, and then it just
really got me thinking about just trying to find where
that place is at.
Speaker 3 (04:44):
Did you feel this way.
Speaker 2 (04:45):
When you watch it.
Speaker 3 (04:47):
Oh I did love Scandal, Okay, but this is different.
Speaker 2 (04:50):
This is different.
Speaker 1 (04:51):
Well, I mean, yes, I know there's a lot and
that one. I'm picking up on a lot of like, man,
you think that's really happening or that could really happen,
or just a lot of that. But I hadn't thought
about is there an actual underworld already?
Speaker 2 (05:04):
I think?
Speaker 4 (05:05):
I mean, I gotta I gotta think that they're at
least for like the preparation for this for they start, Yeah,
because what is then? And then my mind just goes
to what is it going to be? Is it going
to be the a nuclear? Is it going to be?
And then I just have to stop myself. Yeah, that's
just gets scared. Yeah, it's coming.
Speaker 1 (05:24):
Think that's where we stop.
Speaker 2 (05:25):
Yeah, taking me on vacation, bye, everybody.
Speaker 3 (05:29):
I'm not.
Speaker 2 (05:30):
I just think it's wild that people want to survive everything.
I'm just like, can I get out of here exactly?
Speaker 1 (05:34):
I mean, if there was like a world where I
could actually go with twenty five thousand like a fraggle.
Speaker 4 (05:39):
No, they like fake it, They fake the sun. This
is where Alan started to go. This, this is what
was interesting. So the second that he found out that
it wasn't a that it wasn't a real world, and
in the underground this tunnel, he's like, oh, okay, it's
too sci fi for mag O, babe. This isn't sci fi,
this is this is potential reality.
Speaker 1 (05:55):
So same, this is a well because the first like
the first episode, it feels like it's just real today,
the president, the government too much.
Speaker 2 (06:05):
Probably okay, I mean sorry spoiler.
Speaker 4 (06:08):
Still watch because there's still so much more in it.
Speaker 1 (06:13):
And at first I was the same, thing, it can go,
things can go if if if I feel like it's fake,
I can't watch it.
Speaker 3 (06:18):
And so first I was like and then I was like.
Speaker 2 (06:21):
Wait a minute. But to me, this is too close
to being possible.
Speaker 1 (06:24):
Way too close that I go, m h yeah, yeah,
that's why I spoiler.
Speaker 2 (06:29):
Okay, a spoiler.
Speaker 3 (06:30):
It's too late.
Speaker 2 (06:33):
Whatever.
Speaker 4 (06:33):
You figured it out in the second episode, so that's true.
But you've had plenty to figure out.
Speaker 3 (06:38):
If you've read anything about it, you know.
Speaker 2 (06:39):
I don't, but I do now, And that's okay.
Speaker 3 (06:41):
I'm just saying it to the people out there that are.
Speaker 4 (06:43):
So you wouldn't go to an underground world if you
had the ticket to go to the underground world to survive.
You would rather die than go to the underground world.
Speaker 2 (06:54):
So to live and live about that? Son, Son, it's
like living in the.
Speaker 3 (07:00):
But you're alive.
Speaker 2 (07:01):
You're alive, but children, babies are alive.
Speaker 3 (07:05):
Okay, got you?
Speaker 2 (07:07):
No?
Speaker 1 (07:08):
Wow?
Speaker 4 (07:09):
I would do that well, literally, anything to survive, and
that was the temporary well possibly, but the potential, like
the potential to survive.
Speaker 2 (07:18):
I would do anything to do that.
Speaker 3 (07:20):
Well, then question answer, would you do what he did
at the end?
Speaker 4 (07:25):
Oh, gosh, would he do what he did?
Speaker 3 (07:28):
Did you do anything.
Speaker 2 (07:32):
When he well?
Speaker 3 (07:33):
Okay, the people with the tickets?
Speaker 4 (07:36):
Oh, interesting, that's anything to survive. That though was different.
That was revenge.
Speaker 3 (07:41):
It was revenge. But also I would do what a
lot of people would do that.
Speaker 4 (07:45):
I would do what the girl did, not what the
guy did for revenge. Okay, I wouldn't have boom boomed?
Speaker 2 (07:51):
You know what I mean?
Speaker 3 (07:52):
I can't, would you if you watch the show?
Speaker 2 (07:55):
What if I'm getting in?
Speaker 4 (07:56):
Okay, I'll do what I can to get If it's
you and your kids, find someone that looks just like
you and they got a ticket, Hey again, if I
can live, I'm going you're taking I don't.
Speaker 2 (08:08):
Think I could take a life though in that situation.
Speaker 3 (08:11):
Just like Wrestle and item a little bit.
Speaker 2 (08:15):
Is going w w E.
Speaker 1 (08:17):
I'm just thinking, how do you get in without killing them?
Speaker 2 (08:21):
I would find a way, That's the thing.
Speaker 4 (08:23):
We talk my way for a panic attack or something
to to Really, in that situation, I would find a way.
Speaker 1 (08:32):
And I'd be like, oh my god, why are we
wasting our time? Boom boom, let's go And I'm just kidding.
Speaker 2 (08:36):
I'm kidding. Sorry, we just.
Speaker 1 (08:39):
Go rogues sometimes I can't help it.
Speaker 2 (08:41):
If underground is temporary, I might think about it and
that's my final answer. But if it is forever underground,
I don't think I want to be down there. I
can't live like that.
Speaker 3 (08:49):
But you don't know.
Speaker 1 (08:49):
In that moment, you're just trying to survive. She'll be there.
Speaker 2 (08:53):
I don't know. Isn't that bunker you don't get to
come in my I'm.
Speaker 3 (09:00):
Like a fair weather bunker friend. No one's letting me in.
Speaker 4 (09:03):
No, you're not coming in the bunker. And you cannot
deny my children's face. I know.
Speaker 1 (09:09):
But like she wasn't gonna save y'all.
Speaker 3 (09:11):
Hope you know that I'm your new mom.
Speaker 5 (09:21):
Just call me kicks, which then leads, oh boy, let's
take a break, guys, I have a wine about it. Okay,
(09:44):
today it was something that happened, and I'm curious because
I need to know y'all's point of view on it.
Speaker 2 (09:48):
Are you okay? You're crying?
Speaker 1 (09:50):
I was laughing so hard that I was crying and
now I'm trying to sniffle not in the thing, okay.
Speaker 4 (09:53):
Okay, wine, Okay. How do you guys handle your kids
in lying? Chris, and you're giving me a face muse?
Speaker 2 (10:05):
Should I set at the scene first?
Speaker 1 (10:07):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (10:07):
Yeah, okay, it is normal at a lot of ages.
I'd like to say, yes, it's very normal at a
lot of ages. Sure, okay, absolutely, scene.
Speaker 3 (10:16):
I have to remind myself of that.
Speaker 2 (10:17):
Right, yes, so, and I've been very aware of that.
Speaker 4 (10:24):
So like the four five, six seven range, teaching them
about lying, saying hey, you will never ever, ever, ever
ever get in trouble, for like, you will never get
in trouble if you tell me the truth. I might
not like what that truth is, and there might be
(10:46):
consequences to the truth, but I will never be mad
at you.
Speaker 2 (10:51):
Ever.
Speaker 4 (10:52):
The only time I will be mad at you is
if you lie to me. Mommy doesn't like lying. Mommy
doesn't like liars. Now, let me back up to this
because when I was mommy has baggage.
Speaker 3 (11:03):
This is where I go.
Speaker 2 (11:04):
Well, so this is hard.
Speaker 4 (11:06):
And because I was also a liar, right, I lied
to Catherine one too many times.
Speaker 2 (11:14):
I love that you're an actress, Darling, you're an adage.
Speaker 4 (11:18):
No, because this is a part of like the whole
thing is, this is the whole circle thing like And
as I was preparing this topic, you know, I was like,
I also have to own in the fact that I
did massive lying too best friends to other people. Now
do I have little asterisks of why? Sure, you know,
(11:40):
my own revolution of things and my own way of
coping with things, my own way of dealing with my
own shame and traumas and whatever. I get why people
lie because I have lied as well to cover up
my own embarrassments of cheating on a boyfriend or you know,
being a ship person.
Speaker 2 (12:01):
Fine, I've learned. I've grown up again.
Speaker 4 (12:06):
Still not now, you know, I do things like when
we talk about the wedding stuff, I will find a
loophole to not because.
Speaker 2 (12:14):
I don't want to tell the truth.
Speaker 1 (12:15):
Did it?
Speaker 3 (12:16):
But I didn't lie to you.
Speaker 2 (12:17):
That's what I always go to. It feels like you did.
I did not.
Speaker 3 (12:23):
Still it's hard which way it goes.
Speaker 4 (12:26):
That I am at least doing my very best because
I don't want to ever go back to that, because
I know how easy it is to fall back onto that.
When I was dating my ex and in that marriage,
that is where I saw the repercussions of the lying
(12:49):
and what it did to me and the turmoil. And
so that is a massive trigger when someone looks me
in the eye and lies to me. I mean said
that years of straight lies to my face, so for
me again, and I also know too that my ex
had his own reasons for his lying. He grew up
(13:10):
getting in trouble if he told the truth. And so
that was a really big thing that we instilled in
our kids that we will never and that is like
to own his or to honor his childhood where he
got in trouble for lying, which is why he lied.
So like him understanding that in his adulthood again doesn't
make it right. But we as parents came together to
(13:30):
go okay, knowing this is how this affected you, Let's
make sure we don't do this to the kids and
knowing what lying does to me and how it affects me.
Let's just keep it all on a space, right. So
now Jolie is you know, nine and still we're learning.
Having said that, I lost it because I now think
(13:56):
I'm like, she's at least somewhere close enough to know
like lying is, we're not. We're not doing it right,
and it's especially over little things, which this is so
little in my opinion. But I asked her, I said,
you know, did you brush your teeth? And she was
like yes, and and I.
Speaker 2 (14:17):
Was like, no, you didn't.
Speaker 4 (14:18):
Like I know, I can tell when she lies to me.
And I was like, Jolie, I was like, we are
not lying. I was like, I've always told you you
will never get in trouble for telling me the truth.
I might be frustrated that you didn't brush your teeth,
but I might be like, Jolie, I always tell you
first thing in the morning, brush your teeth. Now, please
go do that. But like now, now now we're on
consequences for lying. So the rest of the day, no tea,
(14:41):
like no TV because I know that she likes to
have you know, her quite time of watching you know,
a show for thirty minutes or whatever. So I was like,
and she got so upset about that. I said, and
I told you. Now is the time where I was like,
lying is just just be honest because if you told me,
you wouldn't have gotten in trouble. That's the thing you're
now getting in trouble because of the lie. So I'm
(15:01):
curious what age because I know you have older too,
So what age did you start implementing consequences for that?
But I got I let it affect me too much.
I mean, I had to take it to therapy because
I'm like, I just took out my stuff on her
and that was not okay. But I also need to
find the balance between her knowing it's wrong too.
Speaker 2 (15:24):
That's why I wanted the story because when I've been
lied to you by the kids is so hurtful to
me because I've been lied to so many times before
that I'm like, it's not about what's in front of
me at that point, right.
Speaker 1 (15:37):
I'm so triggered by lying that it's actually been a
hard thing. And with my kids, they do not lie often.
But if I feel like I see a little loophole
at all.
Speaker 3 (15:50):
I'm like, well, you said this, you didn't.
Speaker 1 (15:51):
He's like, you know, especially with Kayden Hubeick, I wasn't
lying to you, but everyone kind of knows. I mean,
I was told to lie as a child.
Speaker 3 (15:59):
You were apps.
Speaker 1 (16:00):
I was grown up going to my grandparents' house in
the car. This is what you were going to tell
Grandma granddaddy today. I was literally taught to be a
liar as a child. We had made me same. I
did do things they never talked about me. Well, we had.
I mean I was told specific lies to tell almost daily.
It felt like really yeah, So it's a huge trigger
(16:22):
for me and I in my college years, I found
myself lying more about just little stupid things, and I
would be like, oh my god, oh my god, oh
my god, what am I doing? Why am I lying?
And I was pretty good at it about getting out
of things and stuff like that. But then I went
like a one eighty almost. I was like, I cannot lie,
Like I just I can't become that. I can't get
(16:44):
my kids to lie. I can't, you know. So I
kind of did a one eighty. But it becomes a
detriment to us sometimes because my kids feel like I
am analyzing every word almost and it's in I can't
think of an example now, but there have been plenty
examples where it's like, Okay, they truly were not lying.
They just like forgot that they didn't they did that,
you know, like it truly was not that big of
a deal, but like, oh, were you lying to me?
(17:06):
It's like, I'm not lying to you, you know, And
so that's been really difficult.
Speaker 3 (17:10):
But I didn't.
Speaker 1 (17:10):
I haven't dealt with it a whole lot. We did
the whole the same thing, and you know, like, you
will not be in trouble if you tell the truth.
They've definitely kept things from me that I've found out later,
and I've had to not take that as a lie
because at first I almost took it like I was
being lied to. That was that's kind of tricky. But
I've learned now as they're older, to let them come
(17:31):
to me with it when they're ready, right, which is hard.
Speaker 4 (17:34):
It's interesting you said that too, because the other day,
and this has now been a couple of weeks and
I've just been you know, it's been on my list
of one of the topics to share. But the other
day I asked her, I said, hey, do you do
your homework she was supposed to. She wanted to save
one of them. I said, all right, if you do
it with your dad's And so I said, did you
do your homework? And she said yeah. About five minutes later,
she comes back and she goes, Mommy, I actually didn't
(17:54):
do my homework, and I remembered I didn't want to
lie to you about it, and I go, thank you
for the correction. I was like, beautiful, bums, you didn't
do it, but let's go do it together right now,
you know. So I was like, at least she acknowledged
that she lied, and then ope, see we don't lie
because you know, probably because she's like, shit, Mommy's gonna
get it like upset, but but that's okay.
Speaker 1 (18:11):
That'll still get her to a place. And I do
truly think they get so fast in doing things that
they may not because you didn't forget, but like it
may just be like in passing, like hey, dude, did
you take out the trash? Yeah, I took out the
trash trash, And then ten minutes later, oh crap, no,
I forgot to take out the trash. You know, Like
I do think that there has to be room for that,
like it can't be like I have been at times.
Speaker 4 (18:33):
I just saw the intentional lie at that one hundred,
which made me go, you, I know this hundred person
and that is what was like whoop.
Speaker 1 (18:40):
And there's a difference in that and same for me.
If you intentionally lie to me, I can promise you
we have huge consequences in our house, Like it's not
if it's a big So how.
Speaker 4 (18:50):
Do you control that piece of not putting it like
I put his face on her and I should never
do that, Like that was what where I've had to
go into Amy and process that because I don't want
to put such a big thing on her the impact
of what it is.
Speaker 3 (19:07):
Yeah, that's hard.
Speaker 2 (19:09):
I think you're doing that though, So do you do
the same thing?
Speaker 3 (19:13):
Yeah, I notice.
Speaker 2 (19:16):
I notice that this is a toxic trait and I
brought this to Amy. I also have a girlfriend who's
in therapy and so and she's my best friend and
has kids the same age. So I'll say, like, do
you ever do this because it does feel like I
feel shameful for it, but I'll project something that isn't
about them, that's about like my husband onto them.
Speaker 3 (19:35):
That's why.
Speaker 2 (19:36):
And like I have had a lot of guys lie
to me in life, and so Legend being an honest
man matters to me a lot. He's also was in
my belly six years ago, so I have to like, remember,
he's just navigating, but I don't I know. But then
I'm going, where's the line because I don't want that.
Everything is a muscle in my brain. Everything is a muscle,
and the more you strengthen it, the more you can
(19:57):
So it works in good and bad ways. So if
he gets away with a little lie mm hm, you know,
like there has been times where it's bold face lie. Yeah,
And I don't know, but I've done the same thing
where I'm going my reaction to that isn't what isn't
about what's in front of me. My reaction is about
something I'm holding on to that isn't about you.
Speaker 4 (20:15):
Yeah, And that's what I didn't like about my reaction,
which I then had to go back and apologize. I
was like, that reaction wasn't you made a mistake. You
now know Mommy doesn't like lying, and I've told you
a million times not to do this. This is this
is you know why it's not good. But my reaction
I do apologize for because I was like, you do
not lie to me, you know?
Speaker 2 (20:34):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (20:34):
Yeah, I mean I have to do that all the time.
Speaker 2 (20:38):
I have to. I felt terrible. I went and cried
in my room. Yeah yeah, life.
Speaker 3 (20:41):
Two things, two things fold.
Speaker 1 (20:42):
I think it is okay for them to see a
see you cry about it. First of all, I think
it's okay for them to see that you are affected
by the lie, whether it's small, like it hurts mommy
when you are not honest with me, like yeah, that
come from another place.
Speaker 3 (21:00):
But I don't think that's bad for kids to see.
Speaker 1 (21:03):
I think they have to see that, like, yeah, this
might be a minimal why but if you lie to
other people in your life, you can hurt them. And
I think it's okay for them to see that it
is hurtful when you are not honest with someone. I
think it's interesting and I cannot tell you how many
times I go up and I say, everything still stands.
You still have this consequence. I am not okay with
what you did. But man, do I apologize for the
(21:25):
way I reacted? I probably do that It's few and
far between you, but I do it all the time
because my reactions. I I have gotten better are not
always great.
Speaker 3 (21:36):
Als, and I've gotten better.
Speaker 1 (21:38):
I mean, that is one thing I've done from the
get go, because I never got that as a child.
So I was very big on I haven't been great
at not reacting that way like i'd like to be.
I've done better and I've grown. In a perfect world,
I would never react that way, but it is in
a perfect world. And so I just I own it
and I go and times out of ten I'm crying
(22:01):
and I say, I reacted this way and I shouldn't
have and this is why, and that was not okay.
Speaker 3 (22:05):
However, what you did was also not okay.
Speaker 2 (22:08):
Right you guys. I got to own something though. Within that.
Speaker 4 (22:14):
I felt so bad that I did take away the
consequence and I know that was my that's my I've.
Speaker 3 (22:20):
Done that before too. You have, Yeah, absolutely, I don't.
Speaker 1 (22:23):
Yeah, I think that's that's it.
Speaker 2 (22:25):
I felt.
Speaker 1 (22:25):
Yes, they say standard ground, but like, come on, we're
also human and it happens.
Speaker 2 (22:28):
Yeah, I think if you're like, hey, I lost my
emotions and this consequence doesn't fit.
Speaker 4 (22:32):
It was like later in the day because the Alan
and Roman and Jace had gone out and they went
it was like four, so that this happened early early
in the morning, and then it was later in the
day and she was I mean, she was just so
sweet and just I could tell that she, you know,
was my maid. I'm like, I didn't want her to
like be like pleasy too. So that's just like Julie Ray,
(22:54):
You've been, you know, a great girl. She's like, why
don't you go watch that show you want to watch her?
And she was like really, you know, so I'm like, yes,
but next time I'm not doing that, you know.
Speaker 2 (23:02):
Yeah. I think redemption is also a really beautiful thing
to learn too. We are never going to be human.
In a perfect world, you wouldn't even react that way
because you wouldn't be teed up your whole childhood to
have to feel those emotions. Yeah, exactly, And none of
us were in a perfect world. Yeah, we're all just
doing the best we can. I think it's just like
a learning each other and apologizing. Ownership and honesty are
(23:23):
everything in my house. Yeah, ownership and honesty, we can
figure out everything. I just need to know what it
is and I need to know that you're going to
say that you did it. Yep, the spouses too. Everyone
blanket statement.
Speaker 4 (23:39):
Yeah, Chris Jenner is not happy that daughter Chloe Kardashian
is in therapy.
Speaker 2 (23:55):
Did you guys watch the new season? Yes? Yeah? Did
you watch the episode? Yeah? Yeah, I would think I
did it as well.
Speaker 1 (24:02):
Oh, Chloe's fortieth. I just loved how everyone like is
obsessed with Chloe. She's the best, like everyone loves, and
they like showed how much everyone loved Chloe. I loved that.
Speaker 4 (24:14):
It sounds like though, once Courtney got into therapy, her
relationship with her mom changed a beat. And I got
to say, and so, then, of course, you know, Churse
isn't going to be happy that now Chloe is. But
when I started, like truly going into therapy and the family,
learning the whole family stuff, because I always just put
the blame all on my dad, and it was very
(24:34):
eye opening when it changed to my mom, and I
sat there many times going wow, And my relationship with
my mom did change because of therapy, and it hasn't
gone back to how it was beforehand, and I don't
know if it ever will. But I think I needed
I needed that piece of therapy. But I don't think
(24:58):
she knew. I don't think she I've never told her.
That's where it came from why our relationship changed was
because of the things that I found out about in therapy,
because it wasn't just my dad's fault. It's Chris math
that Chloe's in. Because Chloe's acting differently.
Speaker 1 (25:14):
I don't know that she's necessarily she's basically saying that
she's the way when Courtney went to therapy how she
started reacting different differently to Chris. So I think it's
more about being worried that Chloe is going to do
the same.
Speaker 4 (25:30):
Because you know, when you go on therapy, you start to, yeah,
unravel the childhood wounds. Yeah, and when we think it's
just one person, that's somebody else and you're like that.
Speaker 3 (25:38):
Yeah, I see both sides.
Speaker 1 (25:39):
I think that like, if I'm thinking as a mom
and down the road and my kids going to therapy,
I think I would be like obviously happy for them.
I would be very like this is good for you.
But also I could see that little bit of selfishness
being like, oh no, what are you saying?
Speaker 3 (25:56):
Like what's going on? Like what are you not happy about?
What did I do wrong?
Speaker 1 (25:59):
Like Anna? And feeling like, oh, I'm a terrible mother.
Like I can understand that as a mom feeling that way,
especially like generations ago too, like you know, everyone's just
doing the best they can, and I can see where
it would be very uncomfortable as a mother when the
kids are going through.
Speaker 2 (26:16):
That, because there was no one more terrified of what
legend Bruss was going to say to his therapist than me.
Speaker 3 (26:20):
Yeah, like that's scary.
Speaker 2 (26:22):
He's only six, like, you know, like it's scary.
Speaker 3 (26:24):
Yeah, I very vulnerable.
Speaker 1 (26:26):
It does sound like though that Courtney went to Chris
and addressed it and it almost alluded to that it
was better. It was kind of just at the beginning
of that, and I'm sure they'll probably handle it in
a very healthy way.
Speaker 4 (26:39):
But christ we've talked about this because I feel like
we went through the same season of talking to Amy
about our moms. Yeah, and then now it's like, all right,
it is what it is, and yeah, you know we
figured that piece out. Yeah, did you tell your mom
about it in therapy?
Speaker 2 (26:51):
No? Yeah.
Speaker 4 (26:52):
I don't think no offense to our parents' generations. But
I don't think like when I tried to tell my
dad that he was gotcha, what was I telling him?
Anxiously attached? Like he's like, I'm not no, no, So
it's like I don't think they're ever going to hear
any of those flashy words.
Speaker 2 (27:10):
No, we're trying to understand it.
Speaker 4 (27:11):
So I just you just accept them for who they
are and absolutely you know, yeah, and.
Speaker 2 (27:16):
Also accept yourself for what you'll accept and what is not.
Speaker 1 (27:19):
Also, can I just say I've never related to Chloe
Moore when she was talking about that though, because she
was like, do I really want to go to therapy today? No,
but I'm a people pleaser and my therapist is going
to be mad at me. So here I am going
to therapy. Like it was so like I loved it,
but I'm a people pleaser, so now I'm going to therapy,
so my therapist isn't mad at me.
Speaker 2 (27:40):
No, that was that was really so good. Funny makes
something worse than disappointing the therapist.
Speaker 3 (27:46):
Nothing. I can't Eanna's worst nightmare.
Speaker 2 (27:50):
Yesterday I was like I had to cancel because we
had somebody out we had to help.
Speaker 3 (27:53):
Out with the flu.
Speaker 2 (27:54):
Last I was there yesterday. Oh it wasn't yesterday, but
like we had to cancel. And then yesterday I had
this moment I was like I never rescheduled and then
I thought, you know, yeah, when probably Amy's just like, oh,
I'm glad she's feeling so mind that's false, Amy, I
need you.
Speaker 4 (28:08):
I just had a great session with Amy the other day.
It was it was yesterday. It was great, it was
really good. We left the bear up in the woods.
Speaker 1 (28:17):
We left the bear up in the woods.
Speaker 2 (28:19):
Catherine's like, this is what I don't do the everywhere.
Speaker 3 (28:22):
And I'm like, I'm pretty like you. There's no bear,
and does your bear my bear?
Speaker 1 (28:29):
I think she I think she knew better with me, like,
let's not pull out taking the bear into the woods.
Speaker 2 (28:35):
She has your capacity for that piece, she does.
Speaker 4 (28:38):
We went there.
Speaker 2 (28:39):
We went on a bear hunt waiting for a bear.
And she was even one point though, because we were
doing E. M.
Speaker 4 (28:49):
D R. And we're walking up this trail and you know,
while doing yeah.
Speaker 2 (28:56):
That's kind of yeah. So I had the two things.
Speaker 4 (28:58):
In my hand.
Speaker 3 (28:59):
It's a lot going on at once.
Speaker 2 (29:00):
It was yes, sorry, it was.
Speaker 4 (29:04):
And it was a hike up too, doing that and
then going through what I was processing, and then you know,
getting to the top and we're talking about it and
she's like, you know, is what is it?
Speaker 2 (29:15):
What does it feel like?
Speaker 4 (29:15):
And I'm like, Amy, it feels like a bear, like
that's where I like I feel. And then she's like,
we'll look it over there the den and I'm like, oh,
is that a day?
Speaker 2 (29:24):
Like I thought it was like actually an actual bear?
Speaker 4 (29:26):
Don But then she goes then she goes, well, what
do you think, like, do you does the bear need
to stay up here? And would you like some time alone?
I was like, no, no, no, the bear doesn't want to
be alone, like you know, like, don't lot leave me
up here like in the one, like I don't want
to be up here myself startling.
Speaker 3 (29:41):
She's like, this is taking a turn for the worst.
I don't know what I would do. Oh it was
I do love that though.
Speaker 1 (29:48):
That's great. I'm just joking.
Speaker 3 (29:49):
Do you sometimes regret starting these stories? Just come over you?
Speaker 4 (29:53):
But what I know though, is that What I know though,
is that I can go grown the bear anytime I
need her?
Speaker 2 (30:01):
But does it suit me?
Speaker 3 (30:03):
Is the bear bad or good? We left a bear,
but to get it now it's a mama bear? Are
you the mama bear? I don't. I don't think we're
supposed to know. It's part of the thing.
Speaker 4 (30:14):
Yeah you can, but I'm just it's the bear serves
a purpose. Does the bear need to live within me
all the time?
Speaker 5 (30:23):
No?
Speaker 4 (30:24):
Right, okay, and the bear is helpful in protecting and
the bear.
Speaker 2 (30:31):
I'm gonna start crying.
Speaker 1 (30:32):
Like the bear.
Speaker 3 (30:35):
Again, maybe my bear is with your bear.
Speaker 1 (30:44):
Just say for a second, if she said and that's
a den over, there be like, what.
Speaker 3 (30:51):
So out of the woods? O?
Speaker 4 (30:53):
No, But the whole thing was that I when then
we left the bear at the top of the hill,
and then we walked down the hill, and then you know,
she was just like in any time, you need to
go back up there and get her like she's there
for you.
Speaker 2 (31:06):
She just doesn't have to walk every step with you.
Speaker 1 (31:09):
I like that. I have a question though, speaking of
speaking of the bear, the bear, I need an update
on a situation from.
Speaker 2 (31:17):
A not a headline, Catherine.
Speaker 3 (31:20):
I need an update from a couple of weeks ago.
Speaker 1 (31:22):
Okay, we were having some boundary issues with someone in
your life.
Speaker 3 (31:29):
I'm gonna here's the thing, you know, did the bear
take that too?
Speaker 1 (31:32):
You know?
Speaker 3 (31:33):
I feel like we need the bear to come out.
The bear come back that lad my bear shit in
the woods joke the entire time. I'm proud of myself personally.
Here's my thing.
Speaker 1 (31:45):
You can't and like the truth is, I'll just say
it to everybody, Like I don't really talk to you.
So if you start a conversation, I really need like
an update, closure, any closure. I feel like we got
no closure. I got no closure. You know I put
closure you the situation with did we say who it was?
Speaker 2 (32:02):
I don't even know what situation we're talking about.
Speaker 3 (32:04):
I can't remember any.
Speaker 1 (32:05):
Said he was. We talked about we both talked about
how we had some issues with boundaries and it was
okay to put up those boundaries. And you were going
to say something to someone. I don't know if you do.
Speaker 2 (32:15):
Yeah, you mean with my ex?
Speaker 1 (32:18):
Yeah, wasn't sure if we said it was him or
we just knew it was him.
Speaker 3 (32:21):
Yes, how are things with Mike?
Speaker 2 (32:23):
Oh?
Speaker 3 (32:25):
Things I love about this friendship? I do your dirty
works good.
Speaker 2 (32:32):
I'll hike up and get the bear.
Speaker 3 (32:34):
That's what I'm saying, Go get the bear.
Speaker 2 (32:35):
The timing is the bear is not in me.
Speaker 1 (32:41):
Can keep closing me? Ok?
Speaker 4 (32:43):
Go?
Speaker 2 (32:44):
And so Catherine's like, is there a calendar date when
the bear?
Speaker 3 (32:51):
We could talk about it when bear comes back, because
it sounds like that would be more bear is bear now?
Speaker 4 (32:59):
No?
Speaker 2 (32:59):
Okay?
Speaker 4 (32:59):
So I think it's I just I struggle with this
piece because when I talked about the last time about
having someone just always take take take, take, take right,
and so we were talking about and then obviously the
child support thing came up. I had a few people
DM me going, I don't understand because if the roles
(33:19):
were reversed, then you know, you would be asking for
the money, and so why do you constantly complain about
So I do want to asterisk that piece of it.
So I and I was we had a lovely conversation.
I was like, I actually I hear you on that
topic where I have a hard time, And this is
the last I'm going to speak about this because it's serving,
(33:39):
it serves no purpose anymore for my bare walk. But
the piece that frustrates me on that and then that's
the last I'll say of it is it's not a
fifty to fifty split. It is the seventy thirty. He
has them technically eight days a month, so for Wednesdays,
every other five day Saturday.
Speaker 2 (34:00):
So what is that four?
Speaker 4 (34:01):
If I six seven eight, that's eight days a month
to take that high amount of child support does not
seem fair in my mind right, So that piece is
what it is where I have struggled now is that
I did myself and I realized this, I did myself
(34:21):
a disservice post divorce because I I think I wanted
to have that relationship that I've seen with other couples
where everyone had this like beautiful co parenting relationship, and
I felt like I had to almost prove that I
was healed or that I was capable of having this
(34:45):
quote unquote friendship.
Speaker 2 (34:47):
And I.
Speaker 4 (34:51):
I was the one that was like, yeah, you have
to and I even went on interviews and I was like,
you have to have a new relationship. And we have
a new friendship and a new relationship and you have
to form You got to let the past the past.
And I think the problem is is that we got
divorced in twenty twenty one, so it's been four years.
I don't believe that there's enough time passed from all
(35:12):
the things that went on in that relationship to have
the actual authentic, good co parenting situation that I would
hope for, right so, and I think me trying to
do that was he when he's says things and lies
(35:34):
like for example, the only reason. That not the only reason,
but he said he wanted to come on the podcast
so that he could help grow his business, and that
every person that he had sign up to his business,
he's like, I'll give you one hundred bucks, right, And
so he was trying to make it all so profitable
for me, and I was like sure, like yeah, I
(35:55):
mean that helps everybody out right, So if he gets
a client, then I get a little I'll caught back
on it too, because that's I guess what they do
in the insurance world as a referral fee, right, same
thing with I guess agents or whatever do they do
that real estate agents?
Speaker 3 (36:09):
Agent between agents between?
Speaker 2 (36:10):
Okay, so did that ever happen though?
Speaker 1 (36:14):
No? Did he get clients?
Speaker 4 (36:18):
Yeah, sure did. And I have a few friends that
I referred to him. And it's not even about the money.
It's about the lie again, yeah, And so that's the
piece that bothers me. And when I bring it up,
he doesn't say anything about it, like nothing, And so
it's like everything he does only he does things just
to serve himself, and he doesn't ever follow through with
(36:40):
anything he says. And so I just was frustrated that
I keep believing a version of someone that is not
actually changed. He is the same person. So then what
happens is is because I've let that person in, all
past trauma, stuff starts coming back up of all the
(37:03):
lies and everything. So that's that's the hard piece too.
And and Alan was the one that said they don't
don't let him in, Like you know, people were like,
you were talking about going on family vacations. I'm like, yeah,
in a perfect world, I asked. I was like I
sat here and was like, I think it'd be great,
like we should do it. And I still you know,
Alan was always a don't don't bring him in too
(37:23):
much that he isn't this isn't going to end well,
he is who he is, and it's true, like he
is who he is. He will he will always, he's
he doesn't show up, you know, he doesn't. He's he's
not that co parenting parent that is there to really
help in the way, and he's just always going to
(37:44):
take like I said in the last episode, So I
I did myself more damage trying to have a friendship
with someone that has not changed and isn't honest, he doesn't.
And and me even having conversations, like we've tried to
have a conversation. He will always he will never own anything.
I've never gotten a true apology for anything he's ever done.
(38:06):
He's never you know, even when I did that Red
Table talk and they talked about how many women was it,
and I said, like thirteen or whatever, you know, there
was a thing about that. I'm like, that was just
within the first year. Let me remind people, that was
just in the first year. Like when we got he
got out, he was like, I think around that number.
(38:27):
By the time seven years rolled around, I mean at
least twenty plus, you know what I mean, who knows
what that last girl was that he cheated on me with,
which is what made me fiul for divorce ultimately, So
like you got to think all the lies, all the portrayal,
and on top of it, all the things that I'm
actually not saying to protect my kids. Because remember there
(38:48):
was an article that was on Dancing with the Stars
and I took something out of the People magazine. I
called the therapist. Oh no, sorry, I called our publicist
and People magazine and I said, take this out of
the magazine, and my publicist spot me on it. People
ended up taking it out, I said, because that if
(39:09):
me saying that I, my kids won't be able to
come Joly won't be able to come back from that,
and neither roll our relationship. So people are always like, oh,
you should just you know, not you know. I was like,
trust me, I'm protecting my kids by There as many
things I have not said, and those things that have
hurt me the most. Beyond however, I don't care how many,
whether it was one or thirty women, That's not what
(39:31):
hurt me.
Speaker 2 (39:31):
It was all.
Speaker 4 (39:32):
The verbal stuff and everything else that I can't share
that has that Alan has been the one that has
tried to change and help me through all of that,
and so letting him in, what I've realized is was
the worst thing for me, and my journey to letting go,
and the fact that he's constantly like take take, take,
(39:55):
take taking, and the fact that I have to constantly
see him is so hard because of all the betrayal
and all the other stuff on top of it. That
is like the worst thing about co parenting because I
wish I never had to deal with him. I don't,
and I have to be kosher with him. That's the
hardest part. But I've realized from the bear and all
of that, like I don't want him to take any
(40:18):
more of and we were good. That was so that's
that's the frustrating piece. Sore, I'll wrap it up, but
like we were good. I just realize for me to
be really clean of all that and not letting all
that stuff trigger me, I can't. I just can't have
him in my life.
Speaker 2 (40:34):
My therapist used to say to me often that I
continued to go to the hardware store for bread. Yeah,
and she was like, at some point, is it the
hardware store that there's no bread or the fact that
you keep going there. This was an amy, by the way,
but I had to change one of the most important
relationships in my life because what I expected of that
(40:56):
person may never and I'll never say never, because I
think people change and can change. I haven't personally super
experienced that, so it's hard for me to believe, but
I want to believe that. But in my experience, that
person is best placed in a position in my life
where they do not have full access anymore, because it
was detrimental to me exactly, and I think and that
(41:18):
is that he does not get full access anymore, and
he shouldn't. I will be kosher, as I will always do,
but letting him in was the worst thing that I
could have done. In your defense, I think it is
easier for people to have these really whole great relationship
I tried. I wanted to, I know, but you also
don't get time away the relationship where I established and
re established a boundary. I am able to not see
(41:40):
that person for a while. You don't get that luxury
in this situation.
Speaker 1 (41:45):
So well, I think that people like you said, yes,
people can change. That doesn't mean that they get full
access to you, though, right, And if it takes proving right,
it takes proving that you've changed that has not happened.
Speaker 4 (42:01):
And again, I don't care about the hundred bucks that
he was going to eat. It's just the of like
and of the many lies. He says, well, I'll get
you this by the like, and he doesn't.
Speaker 1 (42:11):
Well, how are you going to fully? And that's kind
of always been my question with that. I get it,
like I would have wanted to go on family vacations
and all the things too, but how can you truly heal?
Speaker 3 (42:23):
And I'll say this both of you because he needs.
Speaker 1 (42:26):
Healing too from the relationship even you know he needs
a lot of healing. But I'm saying, how can two
people heal from something that was so tumultuous while still
not getting you're not doing anything to him now. I
truly believe that you have been as as great to him,
But how are you supposed to heal if you're still
(42:48):
getting the same results, Like, how are you not supposed
to get triggered by all the past things? I mean,
it's just like a mom or anyone in your life,
Like I am still going to be triggered by the
things that my mom did to me growing up if
she continually does them to me. Right, So, there's no
way you have to allow for less access. And maybe
ten years down the road somehow he proves and shows
(43:09):
you something differently and you would had a chance to
get past that. But your expectations of him being that
changed person right now is just not reality for you guys, right,
And I think that that was the best thing that
you could do is just boundary up.
Speaker 4 (43:24):
Yeah, And you know, I'm just grateful for Alan too,
because he's he's helped me see things like he's he's like,
why why are you trying? Because I was like I
just want everyone to get along and I just like
I want peace and I want all that, but I
but yeah, he's just he's who he's always going to be.
And I just I And again it just didn't mean
(43:46):
more damage.
Speaker 1 (43:47):
And so well, and you were that kind of person
that you We even talked about something another time where
it's like you just want you don't want bad vibes,
bad anything to feel not good. So that's probably where
that place was coming from. Like I just needed to
feel good. I just needed to feel okay. I needed
to feel okay. It's also okay for it not to
(44:07):
be that way. Yeah, it doesn't all have to be good.
We don't have to get along with everyone in our lives, right,
I mean, we can be kind always right, and we
can you know, say hi, but we don't have to
be friendly with everybody.
Speaker 2 (44:19):
We can also know what we know about the people
based on what they've showed us. Right.
Speaker 4 (44:35):
Well, moving on to the next headline, Brittany cart Wright
says Jax Taylor has done irreparable damage to their son
Cruise after he reveals cocaine addiction. She says, his addiction
unfortunately has done damage to my son and I've spent
years trying to help him. I wish more than anyone
I could say how proud I am of him today,
but I'd be lying. His actions will speak for themselves.
She also went on to say, you can't help me
(44:56):
fall in love with I've done absolutely everything in my
power to get him the help he desperately needs. Unfortunately,
I was naive and believed his empty promises and his
pleads to change for years. And I think, I mean,
a girl, I can I empathize with you. There's that
piece where she said I wish I could say how
proud of him I am today, but I'd be lying.
I think back on all the times that he would
(45:18):
either get baptized, or do this or do X y Z.
It's like, I want to be proud, but when you
continue to do the same thing over and over again,
it's hard to be. It feels empty until proven.
Speaker 2 (45:30):
You know.
Speaker 3 (45:31):
Yeah, how old is their child?
Speaker 2 (45:34):
Two? No? Three? Sorry? Three year old? Time? Yeah?
Speaker 4 (45:39):
That's I mean, that's really tough. And I hope And
she said too, Once you have a child with someone,
it's not easy to leave. It took everything in my
power to gather the strength to walk away for those
that have been through similar you get it. For those
that question me, that's okay. I'm in a much better
place now. And I think again relating to that where
it's like, do people think I wanted to stay in
that marriage? No, but you do what you think is
(45:59):
best in that moment for your kids and never wanted
to be divorced.
Speaker 2 (46:02):
So you know, people have a lot of opinions about
things they've never walked through, right. I mean when I divorced,
I learned that firsthand. It was the shittiest, darkest time
of my life, but it was the most clarifying time
of my life. I had answers for everybody about everything
prior to just crumbling to the ground. And then once
(46:23):
I did that, I was like, you really just don't
know anybody's story.
Speaker 1 (46:26):
Ever, No, that would be tough. I feel for her
in that situation, and that would be that would be
a really hard Like is he around the child that?
Speaker 2 (46:37):
Do we know?
Speaker 1 (46:38):
Like that, that's where my head goes to. I'm like,
it's almost scary to be divorced and know that they
could possibly have your child without you right having this addiction.
Speaker 3 (46:50):
That's scary to me.
Speaker 1 (46:51):
That's where my brain goes on that, but I hope
he gets the hope he needs.
Speaker 2 (46:55):
A wake up call, we pray.
Speaker 4 (46:57):
Hi ladies writing in with a question for your podcast
as women with varying ages and multiple kids, give it
to me straight. Does parenting continue to get more difficult
the older your kids get. I have a two and
a half year old right now, and while it feels
like I'm in the trenches of the terrible twos, threes
are worse.
Speaker 2 (47:14):
I feel the need to remind.
Speaker 4 (47:15):
Myself that since things have only gotten increasingly challenging so far,
they probably will continue to get more difficult into the
kid preteen and of course teenages. Thoughts, my thoughts on
this one are threes worth the hardest years for all
of my kids? And also like this is going to
be the one side of things because I'm just in
(47:36):
this space now where Roman is just a menace of
all things. I mean taking the grass out of all
the trees and the house, and I mean just constantly,
and I I'm trying to love each stage. I know
that sounds so just like they're growing up so fast,
and I'm trying to enjoy even when it's tiring or challenging.
(48:00):
But yes, you know, and I'm scared of when Jolie
turns thirteen and fourteen, but I'm also excited because there'll
be a different friendship that we potentially will have then.
So I don't know. That's just my kind of first thoughts. Yes, challenging,
but like I love I love it too. Even though
it's hard.
Speaker 2 (48:16):
I feel like it gets less physically challenging and more
emotionally challenging as they get older. Yes, as a you know,
we're in our forties and have a baby, it's like, whoa,
it's physically exhausting. But Kat, you have a son about
you know that's driving now, so.
Speaker 3 (48:31):
Yeah, which is yeah, it's crazy. It's just talked to.
Speaker 4 (48:35):
Us about the grill of the evolution of the ages
and growing.
Speaker 1 (48:39):
It's just so different. It's so funny you bring this
up because I just looked at a picture that my
in laws posted. My brother in law and sister in
law are out of town. They have three kids, I
don't know, six and under, seven and under, however, and
the photo she was like, literally like they haven't sat
down once like the kids, you know. And I was like,
I don't know if I could that again, Like I
(49:01):
don't think I could go back in that phase of
my life where you don't actually get to sit down
because you're afraid someone's going to kill themselves, you know
what I mean?
Speaker 3 (49:09):
Like, while you're at why do.
Speaker 2 (49:12):
You think we love these conversations, It's.
Speaker 1 (49:15):
Because I'm already out of it. If I'm still in it,
it might be different. But I couldn't go back to
it like I thought I could once upon a time.
It's just such a different challenge. I happen to love it.
Having said that, at the current time, I don't have
kids that are getting into trouble, and I will say
the difference is speaking to other mothers that I know
(49:37):
who had teens that were into trouble that is an
emotionally physically even it makes you physically exhausted that I
can't imagine. And so luckily my children are great kids.
There is drama, like when it comes to girls and
hurt feelings, and those things are really hard, But otherwise
(49:58):
I'm just it's it is much In my opinion, it's
much easier. Honestly, I think it's much easier than when
they were younger, when it was so physically taxing. But again,
I don't have kids that are getting into trouble, and
I think that that's a different level that could change
that where I'd be like, I need to go back
to when they were toddlers.
Speaker 4 (50:16):
I'll say this too. On a quick little thing. There
was someone that I know no their two year old
son had just passed away from a freak accident, which
is i'll tell you guys off air, just because I
don't want to tell because they haven't personally told what
happened yet. But it's something so freak accident, something that
could easily happen in any of our houses. And when
I watched you know, the Giving of the Organs, and
(50:38):
I mean, I'm cross. I don't know this person. I
just know them through someone who told me, and so
I watched her stuff and I'm bawling and it's just like,
oh my god, this is Roman, Like he's almost too
and I'm just like the preciousness of life and our
children and being able to watch them grow up through
their you know, we talked about the lot through the
(50:59):
line in this and the breakups and the throwing grass
out of here. It's like that has helped me in
the last few weeks of just really enjoying their life
and all of it and their yes, their health and
watching them because it's like you see all these stories
and it's just heartbreaking. So it's like, yes, challenging, and
they're alive and they're healthy.
Speaker 2 (51:20):
Yeah, absolutely, and you know how long we get to
keep them, any of us? Or I just prayed in
the ground way before them. That's right. Okay, anybody want
to anyway to spin that to me again?
Speaker 3 (51:32):
Are we just going to leave it on the kids now?
Speaker 2 (51:34):
Yeah? Listen, my bear is up there, so you know
what I mean. And we barely made it, but we didn't.
Speaker 4 (51:41):
See you Next week, guys, maybe the rabbit will come
out this next one. Yikes, whoa not that rabbit?
Speaker 3 (51:48):
By bye bye
Wind Down with Janet Kramer and I'm Heart Radio Podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
Okay, I just I need to recap this really fast. Catherine.
Did you watch Paradise the end of it?
Speaker 3 (00:11):
Oh my god? Have we talked about this yet?
Speaker 4 (00:13):
Well, we talked, we like briefly talked about it and
then then the season finale, but we haven't talked about
season finale.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
Have you watched Paradise?
Speaker 1 (00:21):
Oh my god, Oh my god. I literally do And
I was like, wait, have we talked about this? Are
you watching the show? This is insane? This is our text,
like we die over.
Speaker 3 (00:30):
What is Paradise?
Speaker 2 (00:32):
It's so good? I think you would like it? Is
it real or fake?
Speaker 4 (00:35):
But I think there's another show that you would love
that I just finished on Netflix. It is amazing.
Speaker 3 (00:40):
What is it?
Speaker 2 (00:41):
We'll go back to Paradise. It's called Running Point.
Speaker 3 (00:44):
We just started it.
Speaker 2 (00:45):
It's so funny. I don't did you.
Speaker 3 (00:49):
Like Ted Lassokat, No, visit a comedy?
Speaker 2 (00:51):
You would not like it?
Speaker 3 (00:51):
Okay, I'm not punning on Maybe try it.
Speaker 4 (00:53):
Kate Hadson, she she's so would like it. She's not
if I love that show so much?
Speaker 2 (01:00):
Okay?
Speaker 5 (01:00):
Good?
Speaker 3 (01:01):
We are like two episodes in.
Speaker 4 (01:02):
It's like Ted Lasso meets How to Lose a Guy
in Ten Days and it's so good. Even Alan was laughing.
It's so funny and so good. I am pumped for
season two, like it's one of my favorite shows of
the year, and Paradise.
Speaker 3 (01:15):
Paradise is my favorite.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
One of those dating show.
Speaker 1 (01:20):
It's like a government no oh okay, yeah, yeah, an underworld.
Speaker 4 (01:26):
So it's a show on Hulu and it is something
catastrophic happened. They built this underground city. Here's my question,
do you think there is an underground city that they're
building in preparation for a D Day?
Speaker 2 (01:42):
Cat I'm gonna like cat field it because.
Speaker 4 (01:48):
That's what I asked Alan when we were watching the
season finale, because it got me thinking because they started
to show the D Day event and then you know,
I started to get a little anxious, and then I'm like, Babe,
do you think there's what if that was the underground world?
Speaker 2 (02:02):
He said, probably.
Speaker 1 (02:03):
I I actually don't think that. I think that there is, really,
but I think that there was so much underlying truth
to that show that was unbelievable in different aspects of
government and the elite controlling things and the possibility millionaires
(02:24):
control as like it felt so real and so true,
but not at the same time to me that it
was just it blew my mind? Do I think there
is now? Not necessarily? Do I think if that same
situation happened like it is coming, we know what's happening,
would they maybe? Now?
Speaker 3 (02:44):
Do I think that.
Speaker 2 (02:46):
Sorry, Okay, is Elon Musk the girl in that show?
Speaker 3 (02:51):
I don't know, maybe, but I.
Speaker 2 (02:55):
Do the question, which then made me go, I do think.
Speaker 1 (03:00):
That a lot of those billionaires have their own underground
things already built with a bunkers what's his face? I
think we already know Bill Gates is either Gates or
the other one. I think a lot of them do.
Let me just say, I think a lot of the
people with a lot of money, yes, have underground houses
already like bunkers, without a doubt, Like, I don't doubt
(03:22):
that at all.
Speaker 3 (03:23):
Actually, so I do think that.
Speaker 2 (03:25):
I mean, I was just trying to get a tornado
underground shelter.
Speaker 3 (03:30):
A billions people.
Speaker 2 (03:31):
No, that was five thousand.
Speaker 3 (03:32):
I'm like, my dad's like survive.
Speaker 2 (03:35):
He's like and I'm like, that's five thousand dollars. She's like,
what about the tornado comes?
Speaker 4 (03:39):
I'm like well, I gotta just hope and pray that
our crawl space isn't that funny, because I'm.
Speaker 1 (03:43):
Like, yeah, yeah, guarantee yes. But I mean, if I
had the money, that's probably what I'd spend it on.
Speaker 2 (03:49):
An underground bunker or a shelter.
Speaker 1 (03:51):
Well, we would have a tornado shelter for sure. So absolutely,
do I think Elon is the girl. I think there's
a lot of possibilities for the girl in that show.
I don't know Elon's the right one, but I think
there's a lot of the Sinatra. Oh and then the
guns and like not having control of the guns, like
(04:13):
just so much to this show.
Speaker 3 (04:16):
That could be a possibility that are just am I
going to enjoy this show? I think actually Preston would.
I think Preston would love it, and I think love it.
Speaker 2 (04:25):
Okay, Alan liked it a lot.
Speaker 3 (04:28):
That I loved the acting.
Speaker 1 (04:30):
I I just I loved There has not been a
lot of great TV lately, I'll be honest, but this
was refreshing. It was something I loved to watch.
Speaker 4 (04:37):
I loved it so good, okay, and then it just
really got me thinking about just trying to find where
that place is at.
Speaker 3 (04:44):
Did you feel this way.
Speaker 2 (04:45):
When you watch it.
Speaker 3 (04:47):
Oh I did love Scandal, Okay, but this is different.
Speaker 2 (04:50):
This is different.
Speaker 1 (04:51):
Well, I mean, yes, I know there's a lot and
that one. I'm picking up on a lot of like, man,
you think that's really happening or that could really happen,
or just a lot of that. But I hadn't thought
about is there an actual underworld already?
Speaker 2 (05:04):
I think?
Speaker 4 (05:05):
I mean, I gotta I gotta think that they're at
least for like the preparation for this for they start, Yeah,
because what is then? And then my mind just goes
to what is it going to be? Is it going
to be the a nuclear? Is it going to be?
And then I just have to stop myself. Yeah, that's
just gets scared. Yeah, it's coming.
Speaker 1 (05:24):
Think that's where we stop.
Speaker 2 (05:25):
Yeah, taking me on vacation, bye, everybody.
Speaker 3 (05:29):
I'm not.
Speaker 2 (05:30):
I just think it's wild that people want to survive everything.
I'm just like, can I get out of here exactly?
Speaker 1 (05:34):
I mean, if there was like a world where I
could actually go with twenty five thousand like a fraggle.
Speaker 4 (05:39):
No, they like fake it, They fake the sun. This
is where Alan started to go. This, this is what
was interesting. So the second that he found out that
it wasn't a that it wasn't a real world, and
in the underground this tunnel, he's like, oh, okay, it's
too sci fi for mag O, babe. This isn't sci fi,
this is this is potential reality.
Speaker 1 (05:55):
So same, this is a well because the first like
the first episode, it feels like it's just real today,
the president, the government too much.
Speaker 2 (06:05):
Probably okay, I mean sorry spoiler.
Speaker 4 (06:08):
Still watch because there's still so much more in it.
Speaker 1 (06:13):
And at first I was the same, thing, it can go,
things can go if if if I feel like it's fake,
I can't watch it.
Speaker 3 (06:18):
And so first I was like and then I was like.
Speaker 2 (06:21):
Wait a minute. But to me, this is too close
to being possible.
Speaker 1 (06:24):
Way too close that I go, m h yeah, yeah,
that's why I spoiler.
Speaker 2 (06:29):
Okay, a spoiler.
Speaker 3 (06:30):
It's too late.
Speaker 2 (06:33):
Whatever.
Speaker 4 (06:33):
You figured it out in the second episode, so that's true.
But you've had plenty to figure out.
Speaker 3 (06:38):
If you've read anything about it, you know.
Speaker 2 (06:39):
I don't, but I do now, And that's okay.
Speaker 3 (06:41):
I'm just saying it to the people out there that are.
Speaker 4 (06:43):
So you wouldn't go to an underground world if you
had the ticket to go to the underground world to survive.
You would rather die than go to the underground world.
Speaker 2 (06:54):
So to live and live about that? Son, Son, it's
like living in the.
Speaker 3 (07:00):
But you're alive.
Speaker 2 (07:01):
You're alive, but children, babies are alive.
Speaker 3 (07:05):
Okay, got you?
Speaker 2 (07:07):
No?
Speaker 1 (07:08):
Wow?
Speaker 4 (07:09):
I would do that well, literally, anything to survive, and
that was the temporary well possibly, but the potential, like
the potential to survive.
Speaker 2 (07:18):
I would do anything to do that.
Speaker 3 (07:20):
Well, then question answer, would you do what he did
at the end?
Speaker 4 (07:25):
Oh, gosh, would he do what he did?
Speaker 3 (07:28):
Did you do anything.
Speaker 2 (07:32):
When he well?
Speaker 3 (07:33):
Okay, the people with the tickets?
Speaker 4 (07:36):
Oh, interesting, that's anything to survive. That though was different.
That was revenge.
Speaker 3 (07:41):
It was revenge. But also I would do what a
lot of people would do that.
Speaker 4 (07:45):
I would do what the girl did, not what the
guy did for revenge. Okay, I wouldn't have boom boomed?
Speaker 2 (07:51):
You know what I mean?
Speaker 3 (07:52):
I can't, would you if you watch the show?
Speaker 2 (07:55):
What if I'm getting in?
Speaker 4 (07:56):
Okay, I'll do what I can to get If it's
you and your kids, find someone that looks just like
you and they got a ticket, Hey again, if I
can live, I'm going you're taking I don't.
Speaker 2 (08:08):
Think I could take a life though in that situation.
Speaker 3 (08:11):
Just like Wrestle and item a little bit.
Speaker 2 (08:15):
Is going w w E.
Speaker 1 (08:17):
I'm just thinking, how do you get in without killing them?
Speaker 2 (08:21):
I would find a way, That's the thing.
Speaker 4 (08:23):
We talk my way for a panic attack or something
to to Really, in that situation, I would find a way.
Speaker 1 (08:32):
And I'd be like, oh my god, why are we
wasting our time? Boom boom, let's go And I'm just kidding.
Speaker 2 (08:36):
I'm kidding. Sorry, we just.
Speaker 1 (08:39):
Go rogues sometimes I can't help it.
Speaker 2 (08:41):
If underground is temporary, I might think about it and
that's my final answer. But if it is forever underground,
I don't think I want to be down there. I
can't live like that.
Speaker 3 (08:49):
But you don't know.
Speaker 1 (08:49):
In that moment, you're just trying to survive. She'll be there.
Speaker 2 (08:53):
I don't know. Isn't that bunker you don't get to
come in my I'm.
Speaker 3 (09:00):
Like a fair weather bunker friend. No one's letting me in.
Speaker 4 (09:03):
No, you're not coming in the bunker. And you cannot
deny my children's face. I know.
Speaker 1 (09:09):
But like she wasn't gonna save y'all.
Speaker 3 (09:11):
Hope you know that I'm your new mom.
Speaker 5 (09:21):
Just call me kicks, which then leads, oh boy, let's
take a break, guys, I have a wine about it. Okay,
(09:44):
today it was something that happened, and I'm curious because
I need to know y'all's point of view on it.
Speaker 2 (09:48):
Are you okay? You're crying?
Speaker 1 (09:50):
I was laughing so hard that I was crying and
now I'm trying to sniffle not in the thing, okay.
Speaker 4 (09:53):
Okay, wine, Okay. How do you guys handle your kids
in lying? Chris, and you're giving me a face muse?
Speaker 2 (10:05):
Should I set at the scene first?
Speaker 1 (10:07):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (10:07):
Yeah, okay, it is normal at a lot of ages.
I'd like to say, yes, it's very normal at a
lot of ages. Sure, okay, absolutely, scene.
Speaker 3 (10:16):
I have to remind myself of that.
Speaker 2 (10:17):
Right, yes, so, and I've been very aware of that.
Speaker 4 (10:24):
So like the four five, six seven range, teaching them
about lying, saying hey, you will never ever, ever, ever
ever get in trouble, for like, you will never get
in trouble if you tell me the truth. I might
not like what that truth is, and there might be
(10:46):
consequences to the truth, but I will never be mad
at you.
Speaker 2 (10:51):
Ever.
Speaker 4 (10:52):
The only time I will be mad at you is
if you lie to me. Mommy doesn't like lying. Mommy
doesn't like liars. Now, let me back up to this
because when I was mommy has baggage.
Speaker 3 (11:03):
This is where I go.
Speaker 2 (11:04):
Well, so this is hard.
Speaker 4 (11:06):
And because I was also a liar, right, I lied
to Catherine one too many times.
Speaker 2 (11:14):
I love that you're an actress, Darling, you're an adage.
Speaker 4 (11:18):
No, because this is a part of like the whole
thing is, this is the whole circle thing like And
as I was preparing this topic, you know, I was like,
I also have to own in the fact that I
did massive lying too best friends to other people. Now
do I have little asterisks of why? Sure, you know,
(11:40):
my own revolution of things and my own way of
coping with things, my own way of dealing with my
own shame and traumas and whatever. I get why people
lie because I have lied as well to cover up
my own embarrassments of cheating on a boyfriend or you know,
being a ship person.
Speaker 2 (12:01):
Fine, I've learned. I've grown up again.
Speaker 4 (12:06):
Still not now, you know, I do things like when
we talk about the wedding stuff, I will find a
loophole to not because.
Speaker 2 (12:14):
I don't want to tell the truth.
Speaker 1 (12:15):
Did it?
Speaker 3 (12:16):
But I didn't lie to you.
Speaker 2 (12:17):
That's what I always go to. It feels like you did.
I did not.
Speaker 3 (12:23):
Still it's hard which way it goes.
Speaker 4 (12:26):
That I am at least doing my very best because
I don't want to ever go back to that, because
I know how easy it is to fall back onto that.
When I was dating my ex and in that marriage,
that is where I saw the repercussions of the lying
(12:49):
and what it did to me and the turmoil. And
so that is a massive trigger when someone looks me
in the eye and lies to me. I mean said
that years of straight lies to my face, so for
me again, and I also know too that my ex
had his own reasons for his lying. He grew up
(13:10):
getting in trouble if he told the truth. And so
that was a really big thing that we instilled in
our kids that we will never and that is like
to own his or to honor his childhood where he
got in trouble for lying, which is why he lied.
So like him understanding that in his adulthood again doesn't
make it right. But we as parents came together to
(13:30):
go okay, knowing this is how this affected you, Let's
make sure we don't do this to the kids and
knowing what lying does to me and how it affects me.
Let's just keep it all on a space, right. So
now Jolie is you know, nine and still we're learning.
Having said that, I lost it because I now think
(13:56):
I'm like, she's at least somewhere close enough to know
like lying is, we're not. We're not doing it right,
and it's especially over little things, which this is so
little in my opinion. But I asked her, I said,
you know, did you brush your teeth? And she was
like yes, and and I.
Speaker 2 (14:17):
Was like, no, you didn't.
Speaker 4 (14:18):
Like I know, I can tell when she lies to me.
And I was like, Jolie, I was like, we are
not lying. I was like, I've always told you you
will never get in trouble for telling me the truth.
I might be frustrated that you didn't brush your teeth,
but I might be like, Jolie, I always tell you
first thing in the morning, brush your teeth. Now, please
go do that. But like now, now now we're on
consequences for lying. So the rest of the day, no tea,
(14:41):
like no TV because I know that she likes to
have you know, her quite time of watching you know,
a show for thirty minutes or whatever. So I was like,
and she got so upset about that. I said, and
I told you. Now is the time where I was like,
lying is just just be honest because if you told me,
you wouldn't have gotten in trouble. That's the thing you're
now getting in trouble because of the lie. So I'm
(15:01):
curious what age because I know you have older too,
So what age did you start implementing consequences for that?
But I got I let it affect me too much.
I mean, I had to take it to therapy because
I'm like, I just took out my stuff on her
and that was not okay. But I also need to
find the balance between her knowing it's wrong too.
Speaker 2 (15:24):
That's why I wanted the story because when I've been
lied to you by the kids is so hurtful to
me because I've been lied to so many times before
that I'm like, it's not about what's in front of
me at that point, right.
Speaker 1 (15:37):
I'm so triggered by lying that it's actually been a
hard thing. And with my kids, they do not lie often.
But if I feel like I see a little loophole
at all.
Speaker 3 (15:50):
I'm like, well, you said this, you didn't.
Speaker 1 (15:51):
He's like, you know, especially with Kayden Hubeick, I wasn't
lying to you, but everyone kind of knows. I mean,
I was told to lie as a child.
Speaker 3 (15:59):
You were apps.
Speaker 1 (16:00):
I was grown up going to my grandparents' house in
the car. This is what you were going to tell
Grandma granddaddy today. I was literally taught to be a
liar as a child. We had made me same. I
did do things they never talked about me. Well, we had.
I mean I was told specific lies to tell almost daily.
It felt like really yeah, So it's a huge trigger
(16:22):
for me and I in my college years, I found
myself lying more about just little stupid things, and I
would be like, oh my god, oh my god, oh
my god, what am I doing? Why am I lying?
And I was pretty good at it about getting out
of things and stuff like that. But then I went
like a one eighty almost. I was like, I cannot lie,
Like I just I can't become that. I can't get
(16:44):
my kids to lie. I can't, you know. So I
kind of did a one eighty. But it becomes a
detriment to us sometimes because my kids feel like I
am analyzing every word almost and it's in I can't
think of an example now, but there have been plenty
examples where it's like, Okay, they truly were not lying.
They just like forgot that they didn't they did that,
you know, like it truly was not that big of
a deal, but like, oh, were you lying to me?
(17:06):
It's like, I'm not lying to you, you know, And
so that's been really difficult.
Speaker 3 (17:10):
But I didn't.
Speaker 1 (17:10):
I haven't dealt with it a whole lot. We did
the whole the same thing, and you know, like, you
will not be in trouble if you tell the truth.
They've definitely kept things from me that I've found out later,
and I've had to not take that as a lie
because at first I almost took it like I was
being lied to. That was that's kind of tricky. But
I've learned now as they're older, to let them come
(17:31):
to me with it when they're ready, right, which is hard.
Speaker 4 (17:34):
It's interesting you said that too, because the other day,
and this has now been a couple of weeks and
I've just been you know, it's been on my list
of one of the topics to share. But the other
day I asked her, I said, hey, do you do
your homework she was supposed to. She wanted to save
one of them. I said, all right, if you do
it with your dad's And so I said, did you
do your homework? And she said yeah. About five minutes later,
she comes back and she goes, Mommy, I actually didn't
(17:54):
do my homework, and I remembered I didn't want to
lie to you about it, and I go, thank you
for the correction. I was like, beautiful, bums, you didn't
do it, but let's go do it together right now,
you know. So I was like, at least she acknowledged
that she lied, and then ope, see we don't lie
because you know, probably because she's like, shit, Mommy's gonna
get it like upset, but but that's okay.
Speaker 1 (18:11):
That'll still get her to a place. And I do
truly think they get so fast in doing things that
they may not because you didn't forget, but like it
may just be like in passing, like hey, dude, did
you take out the trash? Yeah, I took out the
trash trash, And then ten minutes later, oh crap, no,
I forgot to take out the trash. You know, Like
I do think that there has to be room for that,
like it can't be like I have been at times.
Speaker 4 (18:33):
I just saw the intentional lie at that one hundred,
which made me go, you, I know this hundred person
and that is what was like whoop.
Speaker 1 (18:40):
And there's a difference in that and same for me.
If you intentionally lie to me, I can promise you
we have huge consequences in our house, Like it's not
if it's a big So how.
Speaker 4 (18:50):
Do you control that piece of not putting it like
I put his face on her and I should never
do that, Like that was what where I've had to
go into Amy and process that because I don't want
to put such a big thing on her the impact
of what it is.
Speaker 3 (19:07):
Yeah, that's hard.
Speaker 2 (19:09):
I think you're doing that though, So do you do
the same thing?
Speaker 3 (19:13):
Yeah, I notice.
Speaker 2 (19:16):
I notice that this is a toxic trait and I
brought this to Amy. I also have a girlfriend who's
in therapy and so and she's my best friend and
has kids the same age. So I'll say, like, do
you ever do this because it does feel like I
feel shameful for it, but I'll project something that isn't
about them, that's about like my husband onto them.
Speaker 3 (19:35):
That's why.
Speaker 2 (19:36):
And like I have had a lot of guys lie
to me in life, and so Legend being an honest
man matters to me a lot. He's also was in
my belly six years ago, so I have to like, remember,
he's just navigating, but I don't I know. But then
I'm going, where's the line because I don't want that.
Everything is a muscle in my brain. Everything is a muscle,
and the more you strengthen it, the more you can
(19:57):
So it works in good and bad ways. So if
he gets away with a little lie mm hm, you know,
like there has been times where it's bold face lie. Yeah,
And I don't know, but I've done the same thing
where I'm going my reaction to that isn't what isn't
about what's in front of me. My reaction is about
something I'm holding on to that isn't about you.
Speaker 4 (20:15):
Yeah, And that's what I didn't like about my reaction,
which I then had to go back and apologize. I
was like, that reaction wasn't you made a mistake. You
now know Mommy doesn't like lying, and I've told you
a million times not to do this. This is this
is you know why it's not good. But my reaction
I do apologize for because I was like, you do
not lie to me, you know?
Speaker 2 (20:34):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (20:34):
Yeah, I mean I have to do that all the time.
Speaker 2 (20:38):
I have to. I felt terrible. I went and cried
in my room. Yeah yeah, life.
Speaker 3 (20:41):
Two things, two things fold.
Speaker 1 (20:42):
I think it is okay for them to see a
see you cry about it. First of all, I think
it's okay for them to see that you are affected
by the lie, whether it's small, like it hurts mommy
when you are not honest with me, like yeah, that
come from another place.
Speaker 3 (21:00):
But I don't think that's bad for kids to see.
Speaker 1 (21:03):
I think they have to see that, like, yeah, this
might be a minimal why but if you lie to
other people in your life, you can hurt them. And
I think it's okay for them to see that it
is hurtful when you are not honest with someone. I
think it's interesting and I cannot tell you how many
times I go up and I say, everything still stands.
You still have this consequence. I am not okay with
what you did. But man, do I apologize for the
(21:25):
way I reacted? I probably do that It's few and
far between you, but I do it all the time
because my reactions. I I have gotten better are not
always great.
Speaker 3 (21:36):
Als, and I've gotten better.
Speaker 1 (21:38):
I mean, that is one thing I've done from the
get go, because I never got that as a child.
So I was very big on I haven't been great
at not reacting that way like i'd like to be.
I've done better and I've grown. In a perfect world,
I would never react that way, but it is in
a perfect world. And so I just I own it
and I go and times out of ten I'm crying
(22:01):
and I say, I reacted this way and I shouldn't
have and this is why, and that was not okay.
Speaker 3 (22:05):
However, what you did was also not okay.
Speaker 2 (22:08):
Right you guys. I got to own something though. Within that.
Speaker 4 (22:14):
I felt so bad that I did take away the
consequence and I know that was my that's my I've.
Speaker 3 (22:20):
Done that before too. You have, Yeah, absolutely, I don't.
Speaker 1 (22:23):
Yeah, I think that's that's it.
Speaker 2 (22:25):
I felt.
Speaker 1 (22:25):
Yes, they say standard ground, but like, come on, we're
also human and it happens.
Speaker 2 (22:28):
Yeah, I think if you're like, hey, I lost my
emotions and this consequence doesn't fit.
Speaker 4 (22:32):
It was like later in the day because the Alan
and Roman and Jace had gone out and they went
it was like four, so that this happened early early
in the morning, and then it was later in the
day and she was I mean, she was just so
sweet and just I could tell that she, you know,
was my maid. I'm like, I didn't want her to
like be like pleasy too. So that's just like Julie Ray,
(22:54):
You've been, you know, a great girl. She's like, why
don't you go watch that show you want to watch her?
And she was like really, you know, so I'm like, yes,
but next time I'm not doing that, you know.
Speaker 2 (23:02):
Yeah. I think redemption is also a really beautiful thing
to learn too. We are never going to be human.
In a perfect world, you wouldn't even react that way
because you wouldn't be teed up your whole childhood to
have to feel those emotions. Yeah, exactly, And none of
us were in a perfect world. Yeah, we're all just
doing the best we can. I think it's just like
a learning each other and apologizing. Ownership and honesty are
(23:23):
everything in my house. Yeah, ownership and honesty, we can
figure out everything. I just need to know what it
is and I need to know that you're going to
say that you did it. Yep, the spouses too. Everyone
blanket statement.
Speaker 4 (23:39):
Yeah, Chris Jenner is not happy that daughter Chloe Kardashian
is in therapy.
Speaker 2 (23:55):
Did you guys watch the new season? Yes? Yeah? Did
you watch the episode? Yeah? Yeah, I would think I
did it as well.
Speaker 1 (24:02):
Oh, Chloe's fortieth. I just loved how everyone like is
obsessed with Chloe. She's the best, like everyone loves, and
they like showed how much everyone loved Chloe. I loved that.
Speaker 4 (24:14):
It sounds like though, once Courtney got into therapy, her
relationship with her mom changed a beat. And I got
to say, and so, then, of course, you know, Churse
isn't going to be happy that now Chloe is. But
when I started, like truly going into therapy and the family,
learning the whole family stuff, because I always just put
the blame all on my dad, and it was very
(24:34):
eye opening when it changed to my mom, and I
sat there many times going wow, And my relationship with
my mom did change because of therapy, and it hasn't
gone back to how it was beforehand, and I don't
know if it ever will. But I think I needed
I needed that piece of therapy. But I don't think
(24:58):
she knew. I don't think she I've never told her.
That's where it came from why our relationship changed was
because of the things that I found out about in therapy,
because it wasn't just my dad's fault. It's Chris math
that Chloe's in. Because Chloe's acting differently.
Speaker 1 (25:14):
I don't know that she's necessarily she's basically saying that
she's the way when Courtney went to therapy how she
started reacting different differently to Chris. So I think it's
more about being worried that Chloe is going to do
the same.
Speaker 4 (25:30):
Because you know, when you go on therapy, you start to, yeah,
unravel the childhood wounds. Yeah, and when we think it's
just one person, that's somebody else and you're like that.
Speaker 3 (25:38):
Yeah, I see both sides.
Speaker 1 (25:39):
I think that like, if I'm thinking as a mom
and down the road and my kids going to therapy,
I think I would be like obviously happy for them.
I would be very like this is good for you.
But also I could see that little bit of selfishness
being like, oh no, what are you saying?
Speaker 3 (25:56):
Like what's going on? Like what are you not happy about?
What did I do wrong?
Speaker 1 (25:59):
Like Anna? And feeling like, oh, I'm a terrible mother.
Like I can understand that as a mom feeling that way,
especially like generations ago too, like you know, everyone's just
doing the best they can, and I can see where
it would be very uncomfortable as a mother when the
kids are going through.
Speaker 2 (26:16):
That, because there was no one more terrified of what
legend Bruss was going to say to his therapist than me.
Speaker 3 (26:20):
Yeah, like that's scary.
Speaker 2 (26:22):
He's only six, like, you know, like it's scary.
Speaker 3 (26:24):
Yeah, I very vulnerable.
Speaker 1 (26:26):
It does sound like though that Courtney went to Chris
and addressed it and it almost alluded to that it
was better. It was kind of just at the beginning
of that, and I'm sure they'll probably handle it in
a very healthy way.
Speaker 4 (26:39):
But christ we've talked about this because I feel like
we went through the same season of talking to Amy
about our moms. Yeah, and then now it's like, all right,
it is what it is, and yeah, you know we
figured that piece out. Yeah, did you tell your mom
about it in therapy?
Speaker 2 (26:51):
No? Yeah.
Speaker 4 (26:52):
I don't think no offense to our parents' generations. But
I don't think like when I tried to tell my
dad that he was gotcha, what was I telling him?
Anxiously attached? Like he's like, I'm not no, no, So
it's like I don't think they're ever going to hear
any of those flashy words.
Speaker 2 (27:10):
No, we're trying to understand it.
Speaker 4 (27:11):
So I just you just accept them for who they
are and absolutely you know, yeah, and.
Speaker 2 (27:16):
Also accept yourself for what you'll accept and what is not.
Speaker 1 (27:19):
Also, can I just say I've never related to Chloe
Moore when she was talking about that though, because she
was like, do I really want to go to therapy today? No,
but I'm a people pleaser and my therapist is going
to be mad at me. So here I am going
to therapy. Like it was so like I loved it,
but I'm a people pleaser, so now I'm going to therapy,
so my therapist isn't mad at me.
Speaker 2 (27:40):
No, that was that was really so good. Funny makes
something worse than disappointing the therapist.
Speaker 3 (27:46):
Nothing. I can't Eanna's worst nightmare.
Speaker 2 (27:50):
Yesterday I was like I had to cancel because we
had somebody out we had to help.
Speaker 3 (27:53):
Out with the flu.
Speaker 2 (27:54):
Last I was there yesterday. Oh it wasn't yesterday, but
like we had to cancel. And then yesterday I had
this moment I was like I never rescheduled and then
I thought, you know, yeah, when probably Amy's just like, oh,
I'm glad she's feeling so mind that's false, Amy, I
need you.
Speaker 4 (28:08):
I just had a great session with Amy the other day.
It was it was yesterday. It was great, it was
really good. We left the bear up in the woods.
Speaker 1 (28:17):
We left the bear up in the woods.
Speaker 2 (28:19):
Catherine's like, this is what I don't do the everywhere.
Speaker 3 (28:22):
And I'm like, I'm pretty like you. There's no bear,
and does your bear my bear?
Speaker 1 (28:29):
I think she I think she knew better with me, like,
let's not pull out taking the bear into the woods.
Speaker 2 (28:35):
She has your capacity for that piece, she does.
Speaker 4 (28:38):
We went there.
Speaker 2 (28:39):
We went on a bear hunt waiting for a bear.
And she was even one point though, because we were
doing E. M.
Speaker 4 (28:49):
D R. And we're walking up this trail and you know,
while doing yeah.
Speaker 2 (28:56):
That's kind of yeah. So I had the two things.
Speaker 4 (28:58):
In my hand.
Speaker 3 (28:59):
It's a lot going on at once.
Speaker 2 (29:00):
It was yes, sorry, it was.
Speaker 4 (29:04):
And it was a hike up too, doing that and
then going through what I was processing, and then you know,
getting to the top and we're talking about it and
she's like, you know, is what is it?
Speaker 2 (29:15):
What does it feel like?
Speaker 4 (29:15):
And I'm like, Amy, it feels like a bear, like
that's where I like I feel. And then she's like,
we'll look it over there the den and I'm like, oh,
is that a day?
Speaker 2 (29:24):
Like I thought it was like actually an actual bear?
Speaker 4 (29:26):
Don But then she goes then she goes, well, what
do you think, like, do you does the bear need
to stay up here? And would you like some time alone?
I was like, no, no, no, the bear doesn't want to
be alone, like you know, like, don't lot leave me
up here like in the one, like I don't want
to be up here myself startling.
Speaker 3 (29:41):
She's like, this is taking a turn for the worst.
I don't know what I would do. Oh it was
I do love that though.
Speaker 1 (29:48):
That's great. I'm just joking.
Speaker 3 (29:49):
Do you sometimes regret starting these stories? Just come over you?
Speaker 4 (29:53):
But what I know though, is that What I know though,
is that I can go grown the bear anytime I
need her?
Speaker 2 (30:01):
But does it suit me?
Speaker 3 (30:03):
Is the bear bad or good? We left a bear,
but to get it now it's a mama bear? Are
you the mama bear? I don't. I don't think we're
supposed to know. It's part of the thing.
Speaker 4 (30:14):
Yeah you can, but I'm just it's the bear serves
a purpose. Does the bear need to live within me
all the time?
Speaker 5 (30:23):
No?
Speaker 4 (30:24):
Right, okay, and the bear is helpful in protecting and
the bear.
Speaker 2 (30:31):
I'm gonna start crying.
Speaker 1 (30:32):
Like the bear.
Speaker 3 (30:35):
Again, maybe my bear is with your bear.
Speaker 1 (30:44):
Just say for a second, if she said and that's
a den over, there be like, what.
Speaker 3 (30:51):
So out of the woods? O?
Speaker 4 (30:53):
No, But the whole thing was that I when then
we left the bear at the top of the hill,
and then we walked down the hill, and then you know,
she was just like in any time, you need to
go back up there and get her like she's there
for you.
Speaker 2 (31:06):
She just doesn't have to walk every step with you.
Speaker 1 (31:09):
I like that. I have a question though, speaking of
speaking of the bear, the bear, I need an update
on a situation from.
Speaker 2 (31:17):
A not a headline, Catherine.
Speaker 3 (31:20):
I need an update from a couple of weeks ago.
Speaker 1 (31:22):
Okay, we were having some boundary issues with someone in
your life.
Speaker 3 (31:29):
I'm gonna here's the thing, you know, did the bear
take that too?
Speaker 1 (31:32):
You know?
Speaker 3 (31:33):
I feel like we need the bear to come out.
The bear come back that lad my bear shit in
the woods joke the entire time. I'm proud of myself personally.
Here's my thing.
Speaker 1 (31:45):
You can't and like the truth is, I'll just say
it to everybody, Like I don't really talk to you.
So if you start a conversation, I really need like
an update, closure, any closure. I feel like we got
no closure. I got no closure. You know I put
closure you the situation with did we say who it was?
Speaker 2 (32:02):
I don't even know what situation we're talking about.
Speaker 3 (32:04):
I can't remember any.
Speaker 1 (32:05):
Said he was. We talked about we both talked about
how we had some issues with boundaries and it was
okay to put up those boundaries. And you were going
to say something to someone. I don't know if you do.
Speaker 2 (32:15):
Yeah, you mean with my ex?
Speaker 1 (32:18):
Yeah, wasn't sure if we said it was him or
we just knew it was him.
Speaker 3 (32:21):
Yes, how are things with Mike?
Speaker 2 (32:23):
Oh?
Speaker 3 (32:25):
Things I love about this friendship? I do your dirty
works good.
Speaker 2 (32:32):
I'll hike up and get the bear.
Speaker 3 (32:34):
That's what I'm saying, Go get the bear.
Speaker 2 (32:35):
The timing is the bear is not in me.
Speaker 1 (32:41):
Can keep closing me? Ok?
Speaker 4 (32:43):
Go?
Speaker 2 (32:44):
And so Catherine's like, is there a calendar date when
the bear?
Speaker 3 (32:51):
We could talk about it when bear comes back, because
it sounds like that would be more bear is bear now?
Speaker 4 (32:59):
No?
Speaker 2 (32:59):
Okay?
Speaker 4 (32:59):
So I think it's I just I struggle with this
piece because when I talked about the last time about
having someone just always take take take, take, take right,
and so we were talking about and then obviously the
child support thing came up. I had a few people
DM me going, I don't understand because if the roles
(33:19):
were reversed, then you know, you would be asking for
the money, and so why do you constantly complain about
So I do want to asterisk that piece of it.
So I and I was we had a lovely conversation.
I was like, I actually I hear you on that
topic where I have a hard time, And this is
the last I'm going to speak about this because it's serving,
(33:39):
it serves no purpose anymore for my bare walk. But
the piece that frustrates me on that and then that's
the last I'll say of it is it's not a
fifty to fifty split. It is the seventy thirty. He
has them technically eight days a month, so for Wednesdays,
every other five day Saturday.
Speaker 2 (34:00):
So what is that four?
Speaker 4 (34:01):
If I six seven eight, that's eight days a month
to take that high amount of child support does not
seem fair in my mind right, So that piece is
what it is where I have struggled now is that
I did myself and I realized this, I did myself
(34:21):
a disservice post divorce because I I think I wanted
to have that relationship that I've seen with other couples
where everyone had this like beautiful co parenting relationship, and
I felt like I had to almost prove that I
was healed or that I was capable of having this
(34:45):
quote unquote friendship.
Speaker 2 (34:47):
And I.
Speaker 4 (34:51):
I was the one that was like, yeah, you have
to and I even went on interviews and I was like,
you have to have a new relationship. And we have
a new friendship and a new relationship and you have
to form You got to let the past the past.
And I think the problem is is that we got
divorced in twenty twenty one, so it's been four years.
I don't believe that there's enough time passed from all
(35:12):
the things that went on in that relationship to have
the actual authentic, good co parenting situation that I would
hope for, right so, and I think me trying to
do that was he when he's says things and lies
(35:34):
like for example, the only reason. That not the only reason,
but he said he wanted to come on the podcast
so that he could help grow his business, and that
every person that he had sign up to his business,
he's like, I'll give you one hundred bucks, right, And
so he was trying to make it all so profitable
for me, and I was like sure, like yeah, I
(35:55):
mean that helps everybody out right, So if he gets
a client, then I get a little I'll caught back
on it too, because that's I guess what they do
in the insurance world as a referral fee, right, same
thing with I guess agents or whatever do they do
that real estate agents?
Speaker 3 (36:09):
Agent between agents between?
Speaker 2 (36:10):
Okay, so did that ever happen though?
Speaker 1 (36:14):
No? Did he get clients?
Speaker 4 (36:18):
Yeah, sure did. And I have a few friends that
I referred to him. And it's not even about the money.
It's about the lie again, yeah, And so that's the
piece that bothers me. And when I bring it up,
he doesn't say anything about it, like nothing, And so
it's like everything he does only he does things just
to serve himself, and he doesn't ever follow through with
(36:40):
anything he says. And so I just was frustrated that
I keep believing a version of someone that is not
actually changed. He is the same person. So then what
happens is is because I've let that person in, all
past trauma, stuff starts coming back up of all the
(37:03):
lies and everything. So that's that's the hard piece too.
And and Alan was the one that said they don't
don't let him in, Like you know, people were like,
you were talking about going on family vacations. I'm like, yeah,
in a perfect world, I asked. I was like I
sat here and was like, I think it'd be great,
like we should do it. And I still you know,
Alan was always a don't don't bring him in too
(37:23):
much that he isn't this isn't going to end well,
he is who he is, and it's true, like he
is who he is. He will he will always, he's
he doesn't show up, you know, he doesn't. He's he's
not that co parenting parent that is there to really
help in the way, and he's just always going to
(37:44):
take like I said in the last episode, So I
I did myself more damage trying to have a friendship
with someone that has not changed and isn't honest, he doesn't.
And and me even having conversations, like we've tried to
have a conversation. He will always he will never own anything.
I've never gotten a true apology for anything he's ever done.
(38:06):
He's never you know, even when I did that Red
Table talk and they talked about how many women was it,
and I said, like thirteen or whatever, you know, there
was a thing about that. I'm like, that was just
within the first year. Let me remind people, that was
just in the first year. Like when we got he
got out, he was like, I think around that number.
(38:27):
By the time seven years rolled around, I mean at
least twenty plus, you know what I mean, who knows
what that last girl was that he cheated on me with,
which is what made me fiul for divorce ultimately, So
like you got to think all the lies, all the portrayal,
and on top of it, all the things that I'm
actually not saying to protect my kids. Because remember there
(38:48):
was an article that was on Dancing with the Stars
and I took something out of the People magazine. I
called the therapist. Oh no, sorry, I called our publicist
and People magazine and I said, take this out of
the magazine, and my publicist spot me on it. People
ended up taking it out, I said, because that if
(39:09):
me saying that I, my kids won't be able to
come Joly won't be able to come back from that,
and neither roll our relationship. So people are always like, oh,
you should just you know, not you know. I was like,
trust me, I'm protecting my kids by There as many
things I have not said, and those things that have
hurt me the most. Beyond however, I don't care how many,
whether it was one or thirty women, That's not what
(39:31):
hurt me.
Speaker 2 (39:31):
It was all.
Speaker 4 (39:32):
The verbal stuff and everything else that I can't share
that has that Alan has been the one that has
tried to change and help me through all of that,
and so letting him in, what I've realized is was
the worst thing for me, and my journey to letting go,
and the fact that he's constantly like take take, take,
(39:55):
take taking, and the fact that I have to constantly
see him is so hard because of all the betrayal
and all the other stuff on top of it. That
is like the worst thing about co parenting because I
wish I never had to deal with him. I don't,
and I have to be kosher with him. That's the
hardest part. But I've realized from the bear and all
of that, like I don't want him to take any
(40:18):
more of and we were good. That was so that's
that's the frustrating piece. Sore, I'll wrap it up, but
like we were good. I just realize for me to
be really clean of all that and not letting all
that stuff trigger me, I can't. I just can't have
him in my life.
Speaker 2 (40:34):
My therapist used to say to me often that I
continued to go to the hardware store for bread. Yeah,
and she was like, at some point, is it the
hardware store that there's no bread or the fact that
you keep going there. This was an amy, by the way,
but I had to change one of the most important
relationships in my life because what I expected of that
(40:56):
person may never and I'll never say never, because I
think people change and can change. I haven't personally super
experienced that, so it's hard for me to believe, but
I want to believe that. But in my experience, that
person is best placed in a position in my life
where they do not have full access anymore, because it
was detrimental to me exactly, and I think and that
(41:18):
is that he does not get full access anymore, and
he shouldn't. I will be kosher, as I will always do,
but letting him in was the worst thing that I
could have done. In your defense, I think it is
easier for people to have these really whole great relationship
I tried. I wanted to, I know, but you also
don't get time away the relationship where I established and
re established a boundary. I am able to not see
(41:40):
that person for a while. You don't get that luxury
in this situation.
Speaker 1 (41:45):
So well, I think that people like you said, yes,
people can change. That doesn't mean that they get full
access to you, though, right, And if it takes proving right,
it takes proving that you've changed that has not happened.
Speaker 4 (42:01):
And again, I don't care about the hundred bucks that
he was going to eat. It's just the of like
and of the many lies. He says, well, I'll get
you this by the like, and he doesn't.
Speaker 1 (42:11):
Well, how are you going to fully? And that's kind
of always been my question with that. I get it,
like I would have wanted to go on family vacations
and all the things too, but how can you truly heal?
Speaker 3 (42:23):
And I'll say this both of you because he needs.
Speaker 1 (42:26):
Healing too from the relationship even you know he needs
a lot of healing. But I'm saying, how can two
people heal from something that was so tumultuous while still
not getting you're not doing anything to him now. I
truly believe that you have been as as great to him,
But how are you supposed to heal if you're still
(42:48):
getting the same results, Like, how are you not supposed
to get triggered by all the past things? I mean,
it's just like a mom or anyone in your life,
Like I am still going to be triggered by the
things that my mom did to me growing up if
she continually does them to me. Right, So, there's no
way you have to allow for less access. And maybe
ten years down the road somehow he proves and shows
(43:09):
you something differently and you would had a chance to
get past that. But your expectations of him being that
changed person right now is just not reality for you guys, right,
And I think that that was the best thing that
you could do is just boundary up.
Speaker 4 (43:24):
Yeah, And you know, I'm just grateful for Alan too,
because he's he's helped me see things like he's he's like,
why why are you trying? Because I was like I
just want everyone to get along and I just like
I want peace and I want all that, but I
but yeah, he's just he's who he's always going to be.
And I just I And again it just didn't mean
(43:46):
more damage.
Speaker 1 (43:47):
And so well, and you were that kind of person
that you We even talked about something another time where
it's like you just want you don't want bad vibes,
bad anything to feel not good. So that's probably where
that place was coming from. Like I just needed to
feel good. I just needed to feel okay. I needed
to feel okay. It's also okay for it not to
(44:07):
be that way. Yeah, it doesn't all have to be good.
We don't have to get along with everyone in our lives, right,
I mean, we can be kind always right, and we
can you know, say hi, but we don't have to
be friendly with everybody.
Speaker 2 (44:19):
We can also know what we know about the people
based on what they've showed us. Right.
Speaker 4 (44:35):
Well, moving on to the next headline, Brittany cart Wright
says Jax Taylor has done irreparable damage to their son
Cruise after he reveals cocaine addiction. She says, his addiction
unfortunately has done damage to my son and I've spent
years trying to help him. I wish more than anyone
I could say how proud I am of him today,
but I'd be lying. His actions will speak for themselves.
She also went on to say, you can't help me
(44:56):
fall in love with I've done absolutely everything in my
power to get him the help he desperately needs. Unfortunately,
I was naive and believed his empty promises and his
pleads to change for years. And I think, I mean,
a girl, I can I empathize with you. There's that
piece where she said I wish I could say how
proud of him I am today, but I'd be lying.
I think back on all the times that he would
(45:18):
either get baptized, or do this or do X y Z.
It's like, I want to be proud, but when you
continue to do the same thing over and over again,
it's hard to be. It feels empty until proven.
Speaker 2 (45:30):
You know.
Speaker 3 (45:31):
Yeah, how old is their child?
Speaker 2 (45:34):
Two? No? Three? Sorry? Three year old? Time? Yeah?
Speaker 4 (45:39):
That's I mean, that's really tough. And I hope And
she said too, Once you have a child with someone,
it's not easy to leave. It took everything in my
power to gather the strength to walk away for those
that have been through similar you get it. For those
that question me, that's okay. I'm in a much better
place now. And I think again relating to that where
it's like, do people think I wanted to stay in
that marriage? No, but you do what you think is
(45:59):
best in that moment for your kids and never wanted
to be divorced.
Speaker 2 (46:02):
So you know, people have a lot of opinions about
things they've never walked through, right. I mean when I divorced,
I learned that firsthand. It was the shittiest, darkest time
of my life, but it was the most clarifying time
of my life. I had answers for everybody about everything
prior to just crumbling to the ground. And then once
(46:23):
I did that, I was like, you really just don't
know anybody's story.
Speaker 1 (46:26):
Ever, No, that would be tough. I feel for her
in that situation, and that would be that would be
a really hard Like is he around the child that?
Speaker 2 (46:37):
Do we know?
Speaker 1 (46:38):
Like that, that's where my head goes to. I'm like,
it's almost scary to be divorced and know that they
could possibly have your child without you right having this addiction.
Speaker 3 (46:50):
That's scary to me.
Speaker 1 (46:51):
That's where my brain goes on that, but I hope
he gets the hope he needs.
Speaker 2 (46:55):
A wake up call, we pray.
Speaker 4 (46:57):
Hi ladies writing in with a question for your podcast
as women with varying ages and multiple kids, give it
to me straight. Does parenting continue to get more difficult
the older your kids get. I have a two and
a half year old right now, and while it feels
like I'm in the trenches of the terrible twos, threes
are worse.
Speaker 2 (47:14):
I feel the need to remind.
Speaker 4 (47:15):
Myself that since things have only gotten increasingly challenging so far,
they probably will continue to get more difficult into the
kid preteen and of course teenages. Thoughts, my thoughts on
this one are threes worth the hardest years for all
of my kids? And also like this is going to
be the one side of things because I'm just in
(47:36):
this space now where Roman is just a menace of
all things. I mean taking the grass out of all
the trees and the house, and I mean just constantly,
and I I'm trying to love each stage. I know
that sounds so just like they're growing up so fast,
and I'm trying to enjoy even when it's tiring or challenging.
(48:00):
But yes, you know, and I'm scared of when Jolie
turns thirteen and fourteen, but I'm also excited because there'll
be a different friendship that we potentially will have then.
So I don't know. That's just my kind of first thoughts. Yes, challenging,
but like I love I love it too. Even though
it's hard.
Speaker 2 (48:16):
I feel like it gets less physically challenging and more
emotionally challenging as they get older. Yes, as a you know,
we're in our forties and have a baby, it's like, whoa,
it's physically exhausting. But Kat, you have a son about
you know that's driving now, so.
Speaker 3 (48:31):
Yeah, which is yeah, it's crazy. It's just talked to.
Speaker 4 (48:35):
Us about the grill of the evolution of the ages
and growing.
Speaker 1 (48:39):
It's just so different. It's so funny you bring this
up because I just looked at a picture that my
in laws posted. My brother in law and sister in
law are out of town. They have three kids, I
don't know, six and under, seven and under, however, and
the photo she was like, literally like they haven't sat
down once like the kids, you know. And I was like,
I don't know if I could that again, Like I
(49:01):
don't think I could go back in that phase of
my life where you don't actually get to sit down
because you're afraid someone's going to kill themselves, you know
what I mean?
Speaker 3 (49:09):
Like, while you're at why do.
Speaker 2 (49:12):
You think we love these conversations, It's.
Speaker 1 (49:15):
Because I'm already out of it. If I'm still in it,
it might be different. But I couldn't go back to
it like I thought I could once upon a time.
It's just such a different challenge. I happen to love it.
Having said that, at the current time, I don't have
kids that are getting into trouble, and I will say
the difference is speaking to other mothers that I know
(49:37):
who had teens that were into trouble that is an
emotionally physically even it makes you physically exhausted that I
can't imagine. And so luckily my children are great kids.
There is drama, like when it comes to girls and
hurt feelings, and those things are really hard, But otherwise
(49:58):
I'm just it's it is much In my opinion, it's
much easier. Honestly, I think it's much easier than when
they were younger, when it was so physically taxing. But again,
I don't have kids that are getting into trouble, and
I think that that's a different level that could change
that where I'd be like, I need to go back
to when they were toddlers.
Speaker 4 (50:16):
I'll say this too. On a quick little thing. There
was someone that I know no their two year old
son had just passed away from a freak accident, which
is i'll tell you guys off air, just because I
don't want to tell because they haven't personally told what
happened yet. But it's something so freak accident, something that
could easily happen in any of our houses. And when
I watched you know, the Giving of the Organs, and
(50:38):
I mean, I'm cross. I don't know this person. I
just know them through someone who told me, and so
I watched her stuff and I'm bawling and it's just like,
oh my god, this is Roman, Like he's almost too
and I'm just like the preciousness of life and our
children and being able to watch them grow up through
their you know, we talked about the lot through the
(50:59):
line in this and the breakups and the throwing grass
out of here. It's like that has helped me in
the last few weeks of just really enjoying their life
and all of it and their yes, their health and
watching them because it's like you see all these stories
and it's just heartbreaking. So it's like, yes, challenging, and
they're alive and they're healthy.
Speaker 2 (51:20):
Yeah, absolutely, and you know how long we get to
keep them, any of us? Or I just prayed in
the ground way before them. That's right. Okay, anybody want
to anyway to spin that to me again?
Speaker 3 (51:32):
Are we just going to leave it on the kids now?
Speaker 2 (51:34):
Yeah? Listen, my bear is up there, so you know
what I mean. And we barely made it, but we didn't.
Speaker 4 (51:41):
See you Next week, guys, maybe the rabbit will come
out this next one. Yikes, whoa not that rabbit?
Speaker 3 (51:48):
By bye bye
Host
Jana Kramer
Popular Podcasts
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
24/7 News: The Latest
The latest news in 4 minutes updated every hour, every day.
Therapy Gecko
An unlicensed lizard psychologist travels the universe talking to strangers about absolutely nothing. TO CALL THE GECKO: follow me on https://www.twitch.tv/lyleforever to get a notification for when I am taking calls. I am usually live Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays but lately a lot of other times too. I am a gecko.