May 27, 2024 • 28 mins
When a married person isn’t wearing their ring… what does it mean?? Jana and Kathryn discuss the symbolism of the wedding ring while getting into the Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck rumors. Jana reveals the emotional and personal reason behind why she stopped wearing her ring in her previous marriage.
Jana gets vulnerable when opening up about the negative comments she receives about being married multiple times, and hear why she’s grateful for her marriages that didn’t work out.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
Wind Down with Janet Kramer and I'm Heart Radio Podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
Okay, so it's just us today, Cat and I'm supporting.
I'm not wearing a it looks like in the camera
I'm wearing a What are those things called when you
put them on your leg when you get married?
Speaker 3 (00:17):
Oh I never got her? Yeah, I don't know if
I did. I can't even remember. Did you? Maybe I did.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
I'm sure I feel like you would back because I
feel like they're more popular.
Speaker 1 (00:25):
Yeah no, no, I did, because I hate that thing,
you know, Like we're in the reception really like, and
I'm like, why are we doing this in front of people?
Speaker 3 (00:33):
It's so uncomfortable? Yep, yep, I had it, So are
you having one?
Speaker 2 (00:36):
No? But it looks like I'm wearing my over my
third degree burn. I went by the way, Listen. Who
knew her irons were that dangerous?
Speaker 3 (00:46):
It was scary looking there for a minute.
Speaker 2 (00:48):
I know it was bad, but it's gotten so much better.
It's getting better. It finally doesn't hurt after almost two weeks.
Speaker 3 (00:54):
Oh God, that's good.
Speaker 2 (00:55):
I mean it hurts a little, but I'm like, well,
it's kind of like hurt still, But I know who knew.
Speaker 1 (01:02):
I mean, and me got a good second degree burned
from one, so I can only imagine.
Speaker 2 (01:08):
But now that I'm like supporting, like it just looks
like I'm wearing it does well. But I'm sick of
wearing those you know, those bandage or what are those
things called the it's like the tape things that go
around and they stick, but you know when you'd get
your ivy draw.
Speaker 3 (01:24):
Or something like, yeah, like the gauze stuff or what it's.
Speaker 2 (01:27):
Not gauze sticks. Yeah, And so I'm trying to think
of the name, but it's not coming to me. But
it kept like annoying my skin. So I'm like, okay,
I I like to mcgiver things. I'm like, what do
I like, how do I get a thing that can
wrap around aid? Because the band aids are don't fit
like this area. So I took one of my old
(01:49):
leggings that I don't like, and I cut the legs
pretty small. The legging. I mean, I was seriously standing
in my room, going I can figure this out, and
I'm just like, okay, I have back together. I'm like,
all right, how can I do this? And then yeah,
I just was like, oh, I've got these pair of
leggings and if I just cut the thigh parts out
of the legging, yeah, roll it up to my thigh.
Speaker 3 (02:08):
So smart. Anyways, now that you've got it covered.
Speaker 2 (02:10):
People are like, I don't care about your burn or
this is literally on your leg. I wish it has
been a saga.
Speaker 1 (02:16):
I wish people understood the excitement of our world in
the sense that it's like the text are like, how's
Emmy because she's been sick, how's your leg good?
Speaker 3 (02:25):
How's Roman? Like, that's literally our text back and forth.
You know, it's just life.
Speaker 2 (02:31):
You know what's interesting is Sarah Bryce just said the
exact same thing because we were talking about I did
a one of those poop things. Oh yeah, And I'm like.
Speaker 1 (02:44):
Can you be a little bit more specific about what
you mean by poop things?
Speaker 3 (02:47):
Sure.
Speaker 2 (02:48):
So I've been working with this guy over at Invigorate
Health in Franklin, and he's you guys have to me.
We we love Nate. He's been helping regulate the hormones.
And I was talking about gut stuff because now that
I've looked more into it, they're saying, how anxiety is
lots seventy seventy percent stemmed from gut and so I
(03:12):
was like, well, you know, how do you figure out
and he goes, the best way to do it is
take taking a poop sample, and I'm like, explain, So basically,
you poop into this thing, like this plastic or paper thing,
and then you scoop your poop out. Oh, and then
you put it into these tubes and then they send
(03:33):
it in to then see what's going on with your gut,
because then you can one thousand percent pinpoint Okay, this
is what is going on with your this is the
probatic you need, this is what's happening, like like just
completely target exactly what you need. And so I'm like, well,
I'd rather do that than just shoot in the dark
with things. So it was I was and I knew
(03:54):
Sarah Brice did it too, so I'm calling her. I'm like, okay,
so wait, like how do you scoop it out? Like
is there like a spoon or like to like and
she was like, I miss our conversations from Hot Girl
Summer because now we're talking about scooping poop into jars
instead of you.
Speaker 3 (04:14):
Know, men, men, they have changed a lot.
Speaker 2 (04:18):
And I'm like, I know, I wouldn't trade it for
the world though it. But yeah, I mean, now we're
talking about just yeah, like sickness and poop and burns.
But whatever, it's not as exciting as people.
Speaker 3 (04:31):
That's really not that's so funny.
Speaker 2 (04:33):
But so I scooped it out and then he called
me and I had my meeting and it actually kind
of freaked me out. Wait why I so, I'm sure
it's fine, okay, but how did we even get on
that topic?
Speaker 3 (04:48):
I'm talking about?
Speaker 1 (04:48):
How boring?
Speaker 2 (04:49):
Are sorry? I'm like, how did we get to my poop?
Speaker 3 (04:53):
How did this? This is literally real life. I'm finding
out right now what's wrong with your poop?
Speaker 2 (04:57):
Oh? I know, but it's so fascinating. Well, so basically,
you know, he hands you the diagram or like the
whole thing, you know, And I had texted him, didn't
I tell you? I texted him because I was talking
about my bird and you tell me? And then I
was like, hey, is my poop come in yet? Oh yeah?
Speaker 3 (05:15):
And never followed up like he's like.
Speaker 2 (05:18):
Yeah, I haven't looked yet, but I will will in
the second. He's like, yeah, I haven't looked yet, but
I will in a second. And he goes, oh yeah, yep,
not good I was like, you can't tell me not good.
Speaker 3 (05:27):
It's like he hasn't learned yet how to deal with you.
Speaker 2 (05:30):
Like I go not good as I'm dying that good
or not good as in like fixable not good. He's like,
when can you meet? I was like, okay, so I'll
see you in an hour. Yeah, I'm like we were
in Wilmington, bless. I love going to Wilmington, by the way,
It's so fun. So go to his office and he
(05:54):
hands me the thing, so basically and I'm sure I'm fine,
but there's also a percentage that something could be not
great in there, so I have a well, first of all,
the inflammation is like off the charts, like you're supposed
to be under I think it was. I have to
look again, but I think it's supposed to be under
fifty inflammation. I'm four hundred. Oh wow, So like my
(06:17):
inflammation's off the charts. But what kind of scared me
was then I want to get too into it because
I'm not like trying to. I'm again, I'm sure I'm fine,
but having said that, this is like TM, I I'm
so sorry, but but this is also I kind of
want to Now I guess talk about it because it's
something he said. It didn't even make me think about it,
but now that we're almost forty, this is something that,
(06:39):
you know, whatever. So he's like okay. He's like, so
this one worries me a little bit, and I need
you to go get a colonoscopy. And I was like why.
He's like well, he's like not only he was your
blood amount in your stool is like topping charts. He's like,
have you noticed blood in your stool? And I was
like yeah, but I just thought it was like normal.
(07:00):
I was like any you know and post baby I've
I just thought it was like, sorry, we've talked about
this before, but like hemorrhid maybe I was like maybe
I still had one up there and it was like
or I don't know, and he was just like this
should not be anywhere near this number. He's like, I
need you to get a quoenoscopy and I'm like, am
I okay? And he goes, well this marker he's like
you could maybe have rectal cancer and I was so
(07:21):
I just like immediately stair crying in the office and
I was like Nate, and he's like, I'm sure you're fine.
He's like, if it's if it happened post pregnancy. He's like,
most likely there's maybe a hemorrhid you don't know about,
or something that's like tearing every time you go to
the bathroom or whatever.
Speaker 1 (07:33):
That's good information to know because I mean we are
at forty And that literally made me think, oh, I've
never talked to Nate about taking a sample, but like
I should, you know, And then I mean I should
get the same test just to see, you know. I
mean we're getting older, those things that we forget, like
it's time. It's time to start doing these tests.
Speaker 2 (07:51):
When we have to take care of like our body
is the des soul that is keeping us. Yeah, like
I want to be we both want to be our
healthiest versions for the kids. And it's like all right,
I started with the hormone now, then I went to
the food sensitivities. I'm like, all right, all right, gut,
that's the that's powering everything. So with the brain and
you know, just I'm I just want to be like
here as long as I can.
Speaker 3 (08:11):
Yeah, yeah, I went.
Speaker 1 (08:12):
I actually saw him before you did and kind of
got my second blood work back and a lot of
my numbers that were off are getting much better.
Speaker 2 (08:19):
Oh ya.
Speaker 1 (08:19):
And so it's just like that's the first time I've
ever actually okay, this went down. It should keep trending down,
you know, and like this one's perfect now and this
one's like it's just you feel better? Yeah, I mean
I feel great. I mean I haven't done all the
things that you've done. I didn't do the obviously, haven't
done the gut thing. I didn't do the food sensitivities
because I don't feel like I really nothing no food
(08:41):
specific foods make me feel different, you know whatever, So
I haven't done that.
Speaker 3 (08:45):
But yeah, I feel great. We just have certain vitamins
and stuff I'm on.
Speaker 2 (08:48):
So the the interesting piece about the food sensitivity test
is I go, how will I know if when I
go back, because after so many months you can test
out the food again and see he's like, oh, you'll know,
and I'm like, oh, really, well, I and I don't
know if it was in my brain, but I had
something that I didn't know had something in it. But
I was like, oh, my stomach like hurts and I
(09:09):
feel like really tired. And then I was like, wait
a minute, I went back and it had that that
fruit extract. I was like, holy, I bet, I was like,
but so there might be like maybe if someone's tired
or whatever, or you're feeling like it could be the
food you're eating that's causing it.
Speaker 1 (09:23):
It's just yeah, absolutely, it's it's very fascinating. I think
it's all very fascinating.
Speaker 2 (09:27):
Having said that, I don't think I have the sea word,
you know what I mean. I think it was just
I'm sure it's something from pregnancy, right, But now I'm like, well,
now I want to know. Oh yeah, sounds like you
need to immediately called.
Speaker 3 (09:39):
How old are we supposed to get klonosopes anyway?
Speaker 2 (09:41):
I think it's fifty because I remember, like I like people, Hey, Siri,
but I supposed to get a kolonoscopy? Hold, oh, forty five?
Speaker 1 (09:51):
Say I think it got younger because they're diagnosing younger crazy.
So you know we're not far from meeting them anyway.
Speaker 2 (10:00):
Well, let you know how it goes.
Speaker 3 (10:01):
Yeah, let me know.
Speaker 2 (10:02):
I'm like, I don't want to make sure my thought,
but I know I don't know. At least I think
you go to sleep. I was talking to surely girlfriend
about it, who had undone. Surely I mean.
Speaker 1 (10:17):
Hopefully right, Okay, let me know before I call Nate,
because I'm not doing this.
Speaker 3 (10:21):
If you're not asleep, he's not doing it.
Speaker 1 (10:23):
But I know, but I'm saying, before I called Nate,
schedule mine.
Speaker 3 (10:28):
But lord, how did we get here?
Speaker 2 (10:31):
Oh my goodness? Is there anything you want to discuss?
Speaker 1 (10:47):
Let's see, we were talking about this the other day
and I need your take on it. Okay, I'm scared
j Lo and Ben? Oh lord, what is going on?
Did you see where like he was out without his
wedding ring and then now she was just on a
carpet with her wedding ring and then they were together,
but like sources are saying they're not together.
Speaker 3 (11:08):
I mean, it's just I don't know. I don't know
what I think. I don't know.
Speaker 1 (11:13):
But it just had me thinking about, like how much
we literally scrutinize every second of someone's relationship, Like he
could have just forgotten to wear his ring, Like you
remember that time I forgot well a couple of times
I took my rings off to work out.
Speaker 2 (11:29):
Can we just talk about that moment, the fact that
you forgot to wear your wedding ring. You were going to, Yeah,
you were going to the hope Grows event. We yeah,
this is going to just go on the same ride
that we just went on with my poop. So Catherine,
(11:53):
I'm I'm filming in West Virginia. Catherine is on her
way to the Hope Grows event where Windown was being
honored for talking about mental health and we're getting the
Hope Grows Award for bringing awareness. And You're like, but
first some stopping at Target. Okay, like why are you
going to Target? But I need to take you back
(12:13):
for a minute. Okakay, You're gone, okay, right, So I'm
so sorry.
Speaker 1 (12:17):
Right, so I'm already anxious because you're anxious when I'm gone, Yeah,
especially for this kind of thing, like.
Speaker 2 (12:24):
Okay, okay, because the speaking, like we got to speak and.
Speaker 1 (12:26):
It's just me to Kristin and I'm just like so
all day I'm like texting Kristen and I'm like, okay,
but like I'm literally only saying this much, like I
need you to carry this, and she's off on like
I don't know what she's She's like not even paying attention,
you know, And so I'm like frantically getting ready. I
can't remember what I was doing with the kids, but
I had worked out, probably not even that morning, probably
(12:47):
the day before, because I've been doing this badly, not
just my ring, all my rings. And I get in
the car and I'm like, oh my god, I don't
have my rings on. I was like, oh my god,
Amy's going to.
Speaker 2 (12:59):
Be there's our therapist.
Speaker 1 (13:00):
Yes, but I currently do not see Amy. I actually
had only technically seen Amy to help come to a
decision on my marriage. Right, Okay, that's very important to note.
Speaker 3 (13:12):
So I'm like, oh my god.
Speaker 2 (13:13):
I'm living because of what the circumstances coming in.
Speaker 1 (13:16):
Yes, no, you can laugh all you want, and mind you.
Nick was supposed to come and now cannot come. Why
couldn't he come in because he was stuck with an
out of town client whose flight got backed up. Delaight, okay,
this is their only time to look at houses. I'm like, babe,
you know I hate this stuff. Anyway, literally didn't affect
me in the least, but I knew when I walked
in Nick was not going to be there, and I
(13:37):
had no wedding ring on, and I was like, I
cannot see Amy like this.
Speaker 2 (13:40):
So she's like, I'm at Target getting a wedding ring,
and I'm like, what are you doing. She's like, I
have to I can't have amy see me thought, I'm.
Speaker 3 (13:48):
Like, who cares? Oh I forgot your ring?
Speaker 2 (13:52):
Like big deal?
Speaker 3 (13:53):
Yeah I did.
Speaker 1 (13:54):
I was running late and I ran to Target and
bought all the rings I could find.
Speaker 2 (13:57):
So this is interesting. So this leads me to this
interesting topic because the pro like you wanted the perception
like be like, why did you Why did you care
that you didn't have your ring on? Did you want?
Speaker 1 (14:09):
To be completely honest, it has never There's been a
few times two that I've been around you, specifically where
I did not have my ring on and you assumed
something was wrong.
Speaker 2 (14:22):
Well that was like during the early days.
Speaker 1 (14:24):
No, when like one day we did the podcast. Do
you think I was working out in the early days? No,
I just started working out. Literally we did a podcast
one day, I think I knew and then another.
Speaker 2 (14:35):
No, what you know? You guys had your.
Speaker 3 (14:40):
Since we've been together back together? Oh, back together, Yes,
I'm saying in the last month. I just started this
thing in January.
Speaker 2 (14:47):
I'm so confused.
Speaker 1 (14:48):
I have never not worn my ring ever, right until
I actually started lifting weights.
Speaker 2 (14:53):
Oh yeah, So like I thought like maybe like you right.
Speaker 1 (14:57):
Was good, But I'm saying, okay, God, the way you
react did both times, and one of the even that
that was the second time.
Speaker 3 (15:02):
You're like, but what's really going on?
Speaker 1 (15:04):
And I'm like, I can't have this conversation because Janna
is like my therapist, and then Amy is going to
be like, what's going on? Like, I'm not having this
conversation because it literally means nothing. I just forgot my rings,
you know. So anyway, all that to say, none of
the rings fit. I'm like trying to hold a ring
on my finger. She did ask about him not being there,
and she did seem very disappointed. So thankfully I had
(15:24):
some ring on my fingers, so she didn't ask me
about that. All that to say, people judge, not that
you were judging, but people judge caring exactly, Oh, Perc,
Like are you sure everything's okay?
Speaker 2 (15:36):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (15:37):
But like to me, that's also the difference.
Speaker 1 (15:41):
And this is where it kind of goes to j
Lo and Bin if something's truly going on and we're
really I'm not taking my ring off for people to
ask me that.
Speaker 2 (15:50):
So this is an interesting thing because it leads me
back to when I played that game. So I did
back in what year was this what it was back
in when we did Momuary wind Down? Yes, and I
had just found out that he had cheated again, and
(16:12):
I took my ring off, and I wanted people to
notice that my ring was off. Yep. I didn't want
to say that we weren't together, or that we were
on a break or that, but I did want people
to notice, yeah, that's so messed up to even admit that. Well,
I mean, it's truth, but I wanted to. I don't
(16:33):
know why. I just it's not that I wanted the attention.
I just I almost wanted him to know, like, yeah,
he messed up again and I'm not okay, and I
don't know what I'm doing.
Speaker 1 (16:40):
That's like my innertilob Well, I think it was kind
of your way of telling other people, like, y'all think
he's good, but he's not where we're right and I
knew that, and so again I'm the opposite.
Speaker 3 (16:51):
No way is right or wrong.
Speaker 1 (16:53):
I would never do that because I don't want to
talk about those things. When things are not good, I
do not want to so we could be again. I
didn't take my ring off when we were getting divorced, right,
It took Nick taking his off before I even I
just don't you know, for that conversation.
Speaker 3 (17:08):
Yeah, so all that to say, that's why, but I
did get a ring.
Speaker 2 (17:13):
But it's interesting now though, because I wouldn't do that
now because of that's the speculation gives me so much
peaky anxiety. Oh yeah that I'm like, it will stay
on until we are officially yeh.
Speaker 3 (17:27):
But like something happens if you ax. That's the thing.
Speaker 1 (17:29):
If you excellently don't wear yours one day, you're in
a place like j Lo and Ben where people are
going to assume something is wrong. So he could have
just not had his on. Maybe they're not together. Maybe
they are, but I mean we're making assumptions.
Speaker 2 (17:44):
I really don't want to say anything. I think it
sucks to have the all the eyeballs, you know, because
you just don't really know what's going on. Right. It's
the kind of the same thing with Kate Middleton. Everyone
thought they were having issues and then she had freaking cancer.
No that was so you know, and that was that
was I think a wake up call for a lot
of people that did talk about them, because there was
(18:06):
a lot of people, podcasters and news people that came
back and apologized for saying something because you know, they
something was really that's it's awful and it's so bad.
So yeah, I mean, I'm sure there's what marriages doesn't
have issues, right, you know, so I'm sure there where
there's smokeler's fire. And having said that, it's you know,
(18:29):
it just it sucks because people like that that are
in the spotlight can't can't do things privately, can't go
through a marriage that has hard times privately, right, you
can't have a relationship privately. Now that's the life they chose.
You can say that in all the things, but you know,
it's just there's so many eyes and that's got to
(18:50):
be really hard to have people. I mean, I only
have it on the smallest degree, Like I can't even
imagine having it like that, so many eyeballs, so much
prier sure so much. And for her, like I feel
for because she just like she loves to love and
I feel like I and she's just you know, I
want everyone to be happy. Yeah, you know, I truly do.
(19:12):
I want everyone to be happy, and I just you know,
obviously she's had a couple of marriages and I hate
like that that piece for me is the hardest piece,
like even marrying Alan, is the comments of the people
that are going to come in and go, oh, you know,
hope this fourth time, I'm like, you have no idea,
like the journey and like what that that first marriage
(19:33):
is and not that he tried to kill me, you
know what I mean? Like so and then there's me
like trying to defend it again, but like okay, so
what so what She's been married four times? So what
I'm getting married these may times?
Speaker 3 (19:43):
Like okay, yeah, you.
Speaker 2 (19:45):
Know, like I'm not going to fault someone for loving
and trying. Yeah, you know, no for sure. And I
don't think she should, Like I don't feel like anyone
should have the hate and the nuggetivity around loving and trying.
Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't, and I hope. I
(20:06):
just can't imagine the uh that kind of circus of
publicly living like that trying to figure out because it's hard.
It's hard enough like being in a marriage closed closed doors.
Speaker 1 (20:16):
Well, and I think it also kind of shows both
sides of it, like you're you understand that side of it,
but like I think you can also under the stand
the side of like they are in the public eye
and we do talk about these things, like me and
you were talking about them, like, oh, what is going on?
I think there's a fine line, like people want to
know what's going on in people's lives. We're even guilty
(20:37):
of it. We're even like what is going on with Jen?
And you know?
Speaker 2 (20:41):
Like so I think they say that about our friend,
Like I'm like, oh, what's going on? How are you know?
Speaker 3 (20:46):
I'm just saying that.
Speaker 1 (20:47):
I Yes, I think I'm also kind of defending the
other side in a sense that.
Speaker 2 (20:53):
The people ask.
Speaker 1 (20:54):
Yeah, like the people that are asking. I don't defend
hate ever, but I do under stand people wanting to
know and the intrigue behind it. We've built this world
where it's like, even I want to know what's new
with you know, Jen and Ben? Now you know, so,
I just I understand that, but I think that like
(21:15):
until you're on the other side, like you have been,
of the hate behind it, then it's hard to understand
how that affects people.
Speaker 4 (21:34):
Ol.
Speaker 3 (21:34):
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the Hoop podcast host. Check out our episode with Ricky
Martin out now.
Speaker 4 (21:42):
Oh my god, guys. He's a fellow Puerto rican A
good friend. We talk parenthood, we talk TV, film, mental health, travel.
It is a conversation you can only have between friends,
So make sure you check it out.
Speaker 2 (21:56):
Now listen to he said Aado on America's number one
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Speaker 4 (22:00):
Open Your Free, iHeart app and Search.
Speaker 2 (22:03):
He said, So, I don't even know if it's so
much the hate, but I think it's the failure so
like and this this is actually gonna get me like emotional.
But it's like you, I don't think people like do
you think I wanted to be married that many times?
Like truly like.
Speaker 3 (22:22):
You just want to find love.
Speaker 2 (22:23):
It's embarrassing, right right, Yeah.
Speaker 1 (22:27):
No, I mean that's I mean, that's such a that's
always been a really hard thing for you. And I
don't think people understand fully understand that, you know. And
it's I'm sure the same for her, and you know, like.
Speaker 2 (22:40):
That's why I feel bad for her almost Yeah, like
like I like want this for her as much as
I want it for me. There's the right for that
where it's like, oh, I just like I want her
to be so happy. They want everyone to happy. I
want happy, you.
Speaker 1 (22:52):
Know, And you all are the kind of the people
like that I mean, I don't know her. I'm just
making an assumption, but I know you're the kind of
person you wanted to get married once and be happy
for the rest of your life. Like my god, yeah,
that's like the most important thing to you. Like that's
what you But it's almost like you're you're embarrassed and
you're being faulted for trying to find true love and
that's not fair. But I understand the embarrassment behind it,
(23:14):
and I hate that.
Speaker 2 (23:16):
Well, it's just because everyone just reads like headlines and
so I just feel like, I mean, Alan is the
first person who I didn't feel like I had to
defend my past like normally, Like I went on this
one date with this guy and he was like, so
you've been married a lot, And that's always kind of
been the conversation where I'm like, yeah, when I was nineteen,
(23:38):
I met someone and I knew him for you know,
a few days went to Vegas. It was an idiot.
He tried to kill me. They and all that in court. Yeah,
I walked on the aisle to someone else and I
realized within a week that I made a stupid decision.
I was trying to be chosen. I was very young
and I was still like, had a lot to do,
but I knew it wasn't gonna work. And so those
two are like war marriages to me. Right, to me,
(24:02):
I always say, I've been married once, which was with Mike,
And do do people honestly think that I wanted to
not be in that marriage? Like I did not want
my husband to cheat on me countless times? Right, I
would have loved to have been married to him, you know.
Having said that, you know, I'm now grateful for, yeah,
(24:24):
the love that I do have now because it wasn't right.
But I did not want to get divorced. Yeah, Like
I would not have stayed for that many years affair
after affair, Right, I don't want that, but I do
want love, you know. And and so that's that's the
piece too, Like even just with the upcoming wedding, it's
(24:45):
there's embarrassment with it, and you know, people don't know
the whole story. They just see a headline and they
just go and they think with Jen too, like oh,
she's so you know X, Y and Z because she's
been married so many times. Well, no, she's just she's
growing and learning and we make mistakes and yeah, so
that's why I like, I'm just like, that's why I'm
an interested invested in it in a way because I
(25:07):
I have like this, I just want her to be happy.
Speaker 3 (25:10):
Yeah, you're rooting for him, Yeah.
Speaker 2 (25:13):
I want I'm rooting for like, you know, the the
love because it has been it's been a journey for her.
And whereas again where I just like, I'm not saying
I'm like j Lo, but marriage where I am. So
I want that like love for her and the happily
ever after because I feel in my soul that I
have my happily ever after and I'm so grateful now
(25:34):
for those past relationships that have led me to Alan.
Speaker 3 (25:39):
Yeah, sorry, you're fine.
Speaker 2 (25:42):
Well, because it's clearly like a that's my one piece
that like, yeah, you can throw, you can say all
the million things to me, but that's always the one
that like hurts because it's I have shame around it, yeah,
and I don't because it led me here. So it's
like it's it's like a twofold.
Speaker 1 (25:58):
Yeah, but also like we're I'm not supposed to feel
shame for our past. We're not like it led you
to a certain place, Like that's not what God wants
for you. He wants you to be to learn from that,
but he also is trying to show you like, yeah,
it was a windy road and all that, but like
if it wasn't for that.
Speaker 2 (26:16):
Yeah, and now I'm so grateful because I'm like, I
don't I can't imagine a world without Roman. I can't
imagine a world without Alan. Like I'm I'm I love
like I daily. I'm like, thank you, Mike, and you know,
to myself because I'm like, I know, I don't do
that anymore, but I did, you know, because I'm like,
this is a beautiful life that I'd never imagined I
could ever have, and a beautiful love and so I'm
(26:39):
not like I I And that's what even with Alan,
when I told him, I was like, do you want
to know about the things, And He's just like I
don't care. He's like, I love who you are and
how that's shaped you. And I mean, obviously he knows
now and we've talked about it. But that was one
of my favorite things about him when I first met him,
because he it didn't even make him flinch. Yeah, you know,
it didn't make me feel crazy, didn't make me feel
(27:00):
like I had to defend myself. He was just like,
you're a warrior and I love you and you know. Yeah,
so that again, that piece has been great and I'm
not like though there is pieces of shame in it.
It's just because of the comments and stuff. But I'm
so grateful for that path. Yeah done, moving on. Absolutely,
(27:24):
I just want everyone to be happy. That is the
take that. That is the headline that I just I
just want everyone to be happy.
Speaker 3 (27:33):
Oh what else?
Speaker 2 (27:36):
That's about all I got for you now that I'm yeah,
I don't know.
Speaker 3 (27:40):
That's this is what's going on in our world over here.
Speaker 2 (27:43):
I feel like I should just like lean into it though,
Like when I get on the plane, when I get
on the plane to go to Scotland for our wedding,
shed is be like fourth.
Speaker 3 (27:50):
Time here we go.
Speaker 2 (27:52):
I mean I feel I should just play into it.
Speaker 3 (27:54):
I feel like you should.
Speaker 1 (27:56):
I mean again, you're gonna have people saying things either way,
So either like make fun of yourself or.
Speaker 2 (28:03):
I kind of have like I did the other day
on the story, I'm like, never done the second dress.
I'd like if it just kind of makes me, you know, cackle.
You can't hurt me because it already hurt me more so,
I'm already doing it to myself people anyways, all right, Well,
on that note, we need to try on some bridesmaid
(28:24):
dresses that we have in the closet, so all right,
see you next way. See ya bye,
Wind Down with Janet Kramer and I'm Heart Radio Podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
Okay, so it's just us today, Cat and I'm supporting.
I'm not wearing a it looks like in the camera
I'm wearing a What are those things called when you
put them on your leg when you get married?
Speaker 3 (00:17):
Oh I never got her? Yeah, I don't know if
I did. I can't even remember. Did you? Maybe I did.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
I'm sure I feel like you would back because I
feel like they're more popular.
Speaker 1 (00:25):
Yeah no, no, I did, because I hate that thing,
you know, Like we're in the reception really like, and
I'm like, why are we doing this in front of people?
Speaker 3 (00:33):
It's so uncomfortable? Yep, yep, I had it, So are
you having one?
Speaker 2 (00:36):
No? But it looks like I'm wearing my over my
third degree burn. I went by the way, Listen. Who
knew her irons were that dangerous?
Speaker 3 (00:46):
It was scary looking there for a minute.
Speaker 2 (00:48):
I know it was bad, but it's gotten so much better.
It's getting better. It finally doesn't hurt after almost two weeks.
Speaker 3 (00:54):
Oh God, that's good.
Speaker 2 (00:55):
I mean it hurts a little, but I'm like, well,
it's kind of like hurt still, But I know who knew.
Speaker 1 (01:02):
I mean, and me got a good second degree burned
from one, so I can only imagine.
Speaker 2 (01:08):
But now that I'm like supporting, like it just looks
like I'm wearing it does well. But I'm sick of
wearing those you know, those bandage or what are those
things called the it's like the tape things that go
around and they stick, but you know when you'd get
your ivy draw.
Speaker 3 (01:24):
Or something like, yeah, like the gauze stuff or what it's.
Speaker 2 (01:27):
Not gauze sticks. Yeah, And so I'm trying to think
of the name, but it's not coming to me. But
it kept like annoying my skin. So I'm like, okay,
I I like to mcgiver things. I'm like, what do
I like, how do I get a thing that can
wrap around aid? Because the band aids are don't fit
like this area. So I took one of my old
(01:49):
leggings that I don't like, and I cut the legs
pretty small. The legging. I mean, I was seriously standing
in my room, going I can figure this out, and
I'm just like, okay, I have back together. I'm like,
all right, how can I do this? And then yeah,
I just was like, oh, I've got these pair of
leggings and if I just cut the thigh parts out
of the legging, yeah, roll it up to my thigh.
Speaker 3 (02:08):
So smart. Anyways, now that you've got it covered.
Speaker 2 (02:10):
People are like, I don't care about your burn or
this is literally on your leg. I wish it has
been a saga.
Speaker 1 (02:16):
I wish people understood the excitement of our world in
the sense that it's like the text are like, how's
Emmy because she's been sick, how's your leg good?
Speaker 3 (02:25):
How's Roman? Like, that's literally our text back and forth.
You know, it's just life.
Speaker 2 (02:31):
You know what's interesting is Sarah Bryce just said the
exact same thing because we were talking about I did
a one of those poop things. Oh yeah, And I'm like.
Speaker 1 (02:44):
Can you be a little bit more specific about what
you mean by poop things?
Speaker 3 (02:47):
Sure.
Speaker 2 (02:48):
So I've been working with this guy over at Invigorate
Health in Franklin, and he's you guys have to me.
We we love Nate. He's been helping regulate the hormones.
And I was talking about gut stuff because now that
I've looked more into it, they're saying, how anxiety is
lots seventy seventy percent stemmed from gut and so I
(03:12):
was like, well, you know, how do you figure out
and he goes, the best way to do it is
take taking a poop sample, and I'm like, explain, So basically,
you poop into this thing, like this plastic or paper thing,
and then you scoop your poop out. Oh, and then
you put it into these tubes and then they send
(03:33):
it in to then see what's going on with your gut,
because then you can one thousand percent pinpoint Okay, this
is what is going on with your this is the
probatic you need, this is what's happening, like like just
completely target exactly what you need. And so I'm like, well,
I'd rather do that than just shoot in the dark
with things. So it was I was and I knew
(03:54):
Sarah Brice did it too, so I'm calling her. I'm like, okay,
so wait, like how do you scoop it out? Like
is there like a spoon or like to like and
she was like, I miss our conversations from Hot Girl
Summer because now we're talking about scooping poop into jars
instead of you.
Speaker 3 (04:14):
Know, men, men, they have changed a lot.
Speaker 2 (04:18):
And I'm like, I know, I wouldn't trade it for
the world though it. But yeah, I mean, now we're
talking about just yeah, like sickness and poop and burns.
But whatever, it's not as exciting as people.
Speaker 3 (04:31):
That's really not that's so funny.
Speaker 2 (04:33):
But so I scooped it out and then he called
me and I had my meeting and it actually kind
of freaked me out. Wait why I so, I'm sure
it's fine, okay, but how did we even get on
that topic?
Speaker 3 (04:48):
I'm talking about?
Speaker 1 (04:48):
How boring?
Speaker 2 (04:49):
Are sorry? I'm like, how did we get to my poop?
Speaker 3 (04:53):
How did this? This is literally real life. I'm finding
out right now what's wrong with your poop?
Speaker 2 (04:57):
Oh? I know, but it's so fascinating. Well, so basically,
you know, he hands you the diagram or like the
whole thing, you know, And I had texted him, didn't
I tell you? I texted him because I was talking
about my bird and you tell me? And then I
was like, hey, is my poop come in yet? Oh yeah?
Speaker 3 (05:15):
And never followed up like he's like.
Speaker 2 (05:18):
Yeah, I haven't looked yet, but I will will in
the second. He's like, yeah, I haven't looked yet, but
I will in a second. And he goes, oh yeah, yep,
not good I was like, you can't tell me not good.
Speaker 3 (05:27):
It's like he hasn't learned yet how to deal with you.
Speaker 2 (05:30):
Like I go not good as I'm dying that good
or not good as in like fixable not good. He's like,
when can you meet? I was like, okay, so I'll
see you in an hour. Yeah, I'm like we were
in Wilmington, bless. I love going to Wilmington, by the way,
It's so fun. So go to his office and he
(05:54):
hands me the thing, so basically and I'm sure I'm fine,
but there's also a percentage that something could be not
great in there, so I have a well, first of all,
the inflammation is like off the charts, like you're supposed
to be under I think it was. I have to
look again, but I think it's supposed to be under
fifty inflammation. I'm four hundred. Oh wow, So like my
(06:17):
inflammation's off the charts. But what kind of scared me
was then I want to get too into it because
I'm not like trying to. I'm again, I'm sure I'm fine,
but having said that, this is like TM, I I'm
so sorry, but but this is also I kind of
want to Now I guess talk about it because it's
something he said. It didn't even make me think about it,
but now that we're almost forty, this is something that,
(06:39):
you know, whatever. So he's like okay. He's like, so
this one worries me a little bit, and I need
you to go get a colonoscopy. And I was like why.
He's like well, he's like not only he was your
blood amount in your stool is like topping charts. He's like,
have you noticed blood in your stool? And I was
like yeah, but I just thought it was like normal.
(07:00):
I was like any you know and post baby I've
I just thought it was like, sorry, we've talked about
this before, but like hemorrhid maybe I was like maybe
I still had one up there and it was like
or I don't know, and he was just like this
should not be anywhere near this number. He's like, I
need you to get a quoenoscopy and I'm like, am
I okay? And he goes, well this marker he's like
you could maybe have rectal cancer and I was so
(07:21):
I just like immediately stair crying in the office and
I was like Nate, and he's like, I'm sure you're fine.
He's like, if it's if it happened post pregnancy. He's like,
most likely there's maybe a hemorrhid you don't know about,
or something that's like tearing every time you go to
the bathroom or whatever.
Speaker 1 (07:33):
That's good information to know because I mean we are
at forty And that literally made me think, oh, I've
never talked to Nate about taking a sample, but like
I should, you know, And then I mean I should
get the same test just to see, you know. I
mean we're getting older, those things that we forget, like
it's time. It's time to start doing these tests.
Speaker 2 (07:51):
When we have to take care of like our body
is the des soul that is keeping us. Yeah, like
I want to be we both want to be our
healthiest versions for the kids. And it's like all right,
I started with the hormone now, then I went to
the food sensitivities. I'm like, all right, all right, gut,
that's the that's powering everything. So with the brain and
you know, just I'm I just want to be like
here as long as I can.
Speaker 3 (08:11):
Yeah, yeah, I went.
Speaker 1 (08:12):
I actually saw him before you did and kind of
got my second blood work back and a lot of
my numbers that were off are getting much better.
Speaker 2 (08:19):
Oh ya.
Speaker 1 (08:19):
And so it's just like that's the first time I've
ever actually okay, this went down. It should keep trending down,
you know, and like this one's perfect now and this
one's like it's just you feel better? Yeah, I mean
I feel great. I mean I haven't done all the
things that you've done. I didn't do the obviously, haven't
done the gut thing. I didn't do the food sensitivities
because I don't feel like I really nothing no food
(08:41):
specific foods make me feel different, you know whatever, So
I haven't done that.
Speaker 3 (08:45):
But yeah, I feel great. We just have certain vitamins
and stuff I'm on.
Speaker 2 (08:48):
So the the interesting piece about the food sensitivity test
is I go, how will I know if when I
go back, because after so many months you can test
out the food again and see he's like, oh, you'll know,
and I'm like, oh, really, well, I and I don't
know if it was in my brain, but I had
something that I didn't know had something in it. But
I was like, oh, my stomach like hurts and I
(09:09):
feel like really tired. And then I was like, wait
a minute, I went back and it had that that
fruit extract. I was like, holy, I bet, I was like,
but so there might be like maybe if someone's tired
or whatever, or you're feeling like it could be the
food you're eating that's causing it.
Speaker 1 (09:23):
It's just yeah, absolutely, it's it's very fascinating. I think
it's all very fascinating.
Speaker 2 (09:27):
Having said that, I don't think I have the sea word,
you know what I mean. I think it was just
I'm sure it's something from pregnancy, right, But now I'm like, well,
now I want to know. Oh yeah, sounds like you
need to immediately called.
Speaker 3 (09:39):
How old are we supposed to get klonosopes anyway?
Speaker 2 (09:41):
I think it's fifty because I remember, like I like people, Hey, Siri,
but I supposed to get a kolonoscopy? Hold, oh, forty five?
Speaker 1 (09:51):
Say I think it got younger because they're diagnosing younger crazy.
So you know we're not far from meeting them anyway.
Speaker 2 (10:00):
Well, let you know how it goes.
Speaker 3 (10:01):
Yeah, let me know.
Speaker 2 (10:02):
I'm like, I don't want to make sure my thought,
but I know I don't know. At least I think
you go to sleep. I was talking to surely girlfriend
about it, who had undone. Surely I mean.
Speaker 1 (10:17):
Hopefully right, Okay, let me know before I call Nate,
because I'm not doing this.
Speaker 3 (10:21):
If you're not asleep, he's not doing it.
Speaker 1 (10:23):
But I know, but I'm saying, before I called Nate,
schedule mine.
Speaker 3 (10:28):
But lord, how did we get here?
Speaker 2 (10:31):
Oh my goodness? Is there anything you want to discuss?
Speaker 1 (10:47):
Let's see, we were talking about this the other day
and I need your take on it. Okay, I'm scared
j Lo and Ben? Oh lord, what is going on?
Did you see where like he was out without his
wedding ring and then now she was just on a
carpet with her wedding ring and then they were together,
but like sources are saying they're not together.
Speaker 3 (11:08):
I mean, it's just I don't know. I don't know
what I think. I don't know.
Speaker 1 (11:13):
But it just had me thinking about, like how much
we literally scrutinize every second of someone's relationship, Like he
could have just forgotten to wear his ring, Like you
remember that time I forgot well a couple of times
I took my rings off to work out.
Speaker 2 (11:29):
Can we just talk about that moment, the fact that
you forgot to wear your wedding ring. You were going to, Yeah,
you were going to the hope Grows event. We yeah,
this is going to just go on the same ride
that we just went on with my poop. So Catherine,
(11:53):
I'm I'm filming in West Virginia. Catherine is on her
way to the Hope Grows event where Windown was being
honored for talking about mental health and we're getting the
Hope Grows Award for bringing awareness. And You're like, but
first some stopping at Target. Okay, like why are you
going to Target? But I need to take you back
(12:13):
for a minute. Okakay, You're gone, okay, right, So I'm
so sorry.
Speaker 1 (12:17):
Right, so I'm already anxious because you're anxious when I'm gone, Yeah,
especially for this kind of thing, like.
Speaker 2 (12:24):
Okay, okay, because the speaking, like we got to speak and.
Speaker 1 (12:26):
It's just me to Kristin and I'm just like so
all day I'm like texting Kristen and I'm like, okay,
but like I'm literally only saying this much, like I
need you to carry this, and she's off on like
I don't know what she's She's like not even paying attention,
you know, And so I'm like frantically getting ready. I
can't remember what I was doing with the kids, but
I had worked out, probably not even that morning, probably
(12:47):
the day before, because I've been doing this badly, not
just my ring, all my rings. And I get in
the car and I'm like, oh my god, I don't
have my rings on. I was like, oh my god,
Amy's going to.
Speaker 2 (12:59):
Be there's our therapist.
Speaker 1 (13:00):
Yes, but I currently do not see Amy. I actually
had only technically seen Amy to help come to a
decision on my marriage. Right, Okay, that's very important to note.
Speaker 3 (13:12):
So I'm like, oh my god.
Speaker 2 (13:13):
I'm living because of what the circumstances coming in.
Speaker 1 (13:16):
Yes, no, you can laugh all you want, and mind you.
Nick was supposed to come and now cannot come. Why
couldn't he come in because he was stuck with an
out of town client whose flight got backed up. Delaight, okay,
this is their only time to look at houses. I'm like, babe,
you know I hate this stuff. Anyway, literally didn't affect
me in the least, but I knew when I walked
in Nick was not going to be there, and I
(13:37):
had no wedding ring on, and I was like, I
cannot see Amy like this.
Speaker 2 (13:40):
So she's like, I'm at Target getting a wedding ring,
and I'm like, what are you doing. She's like, I
have to I can't have amy see me thought, I'm.
Speaker 3 (13:48):
Like, who cares? Oh I forgot your ring?
Speaker 2 (13:52):
Like big deal?
Speaker 3 (13:53):
Yeah I did.
Speaker 1 (13:54):
I was running late and I ran to Target and
bought all the rings I could find.
Speaker 2 (13:57):
So this is interesting. So this leads me to this
interesting topic because the pro like you wanted the perception
like be like, why did you Why did you care
that you didn't have your ring on? Did you want?
Speaker 1 (14:09):
To be completely honest, it has never There's been a
few times two that I've been around you, specifically where
I did not have my ring on and you assumed
something was wrong.
Speaker 2 (14:22):
Well that was like during the early days.
Speaker 1 (14:24):
No, when like one day we did the podcast. Do
you think I was working out in the early days? No,
I just started working out. Literally we did a podcast
one day, I think I knew and then another.
Speaker 2 (14:35):
No, what you know? You guys had your.
Speaker 3 (14:40):
Since we've been together back together? Oh, back together, Yes,
I'm saying in the last month. I just started this
thing in January.
Speaker 2 (14:47):
I'm so confused.
Speaker 1 (14:48):
I have never not worn my ring ever, right until
I actually started lifting weights.
Speaker 2 (14:53):
Oh yeah, So like I thought like maybe like you right.
Speaker 1 (14:57):
Was good, But I'm saying, okay, God, the way you
react did both times, and one of the even that
that was the second time.
Speaker 3 (15:02):
You're like, but what's really going on?
Speaker 1 (15:04):
And I'm like, I can't have this conversation because Janna
is like my therapist, and then Amy is going to
be like, what's going on? Like, I'm not having this
conversation because it literally means nothing. I just forgot my rings,
you know. So anyway, all that to say, none of
the rings fit. I'm like trying to hold a ring
on my finger. She did ask about him not being there,
and she did seem very disappointed. So thankfully I had
(15:24):
some ring on my fingers, so she didn't ask me
about that. All that to say, people judge, not that
you were judging, but people judge caring exactly, Oh, Perc,
Like are you sure everything's okay?
Speaker 2 (15:36):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (15:37):
But like to me, that's also the difference.
Speaker 1 (15:41):
And this is where it kind of goes to j
Lo and Bin if something's truly going on and we're
really I'm not taking my ring off for people to
ask me that.
Speaker 2 (15:50):
So this is an interesting thing because it leads me
back to when I played that game. So I did
back in what year was this what it was back
in when we did Momuary wind Down? Yes, and I
had just found out that he had cheated again, and
(16:12):
I took my ring off, and I wanted people to
notice that my ring was off. Yep. I didn't want
to say that we weren't together, or that we were
on a break or that, but I did want people
to notice, yeah, that's so messed up to even admit that. Well,
I mean, it's truth, but I wanted to. I don't
(16:33):
know why. I just it's not that I wanted the attention.
I just I almost wanted him to know, like, yeah,
he messed up again and I'm not okay, and I
don't know what I'm doing.
Speaker 1 (16:40):
That's like my innertilob Well, I think it was kind
of your way of telling other people, like, y'all think
he's good, but he's not where we're right and I
knew that, and so again I'm the opposite.
Speaker 3 (16:51):
No way is right or wrong.
Speaker 1 (16:53):
I would never do that because I don't want to
talk about those things. When things are not good, I
do not want to so we could be again. I
didn't take my ring off when we were getting divorced, right,
It took Nick taking his off before I even I
just don't you know, for that conversation.
Speaker 3 (17:08):
Yeah, so all that to say, that's why, but I
did get a ring.
Speaker 2 (17:13):
But it's interesting now though, because I wouldn't do that
now because of that's the speculation gives me so much
peaky anxiety. Oh yeah that I'm like, it will stay
on until we are officially yeh.
Speaker 3 (17:27):
But like something happens if you ax. That's the thing.
Speaker 1 (17:29):
If you excellently don't wear yours one day, you're in
a place like j Lo and Ben where people are
going to assume something is wrong. So he could have
just not had his on. Maybe they're not together. Maybe
they are, but I mean we're making assumptions.
Speaker 2 (17:44):
I really don't want to say anything. I think it
sucks to have the all the eyeballs, you know, because
you just don't really know what's going on. Right. It's
the kind of the same thing with Kate Middleton. Everyone
thought they were having issues and then she had freaking cancer.
No that was so you know, and that was that
was I think a wake up call for a lot
of people that did talk about them, because there was
(18:06):
a lot of people, podcasters and news people that came
back and apologized for saying something because you know, they
something was really that's it's awful and it's so bad.
So yeah, I mean, I'm sure there's what marriages doesn't
have issues, right, you know, so I'm sure there where
there's smokeler's fire. And having said that, it's you know,
(18:29):
it just it sucks because people like that that are
in the spotlight can't can't do things privately, can't go
through a marriage that has hard times privately, right, you
can't have a relationship privately. Now that's the life they chose.
You can say that in all the things, but you know,
it's just there's so many eyes and that's got to
(18:50):
be really hard to have people. I mean, I only
have it on the smallest degree, Like I can't even
imagine having it like that, so many eyeballs, so much
prier sure so much. And for her, like I feel
for because she just like she loves to love and
I feel like I and she's just you know, I
want everyone to be happy. Yeah, you know, I truly do.
(19:12):
I want everyone to be happy, and I just you know,
obviously she's had a couple of marriages and I hate
like that that piece for me is the hardest piece,
like even marrying Alan, is the comments of the people
that are going to come in and go, oh, you know,
hope this fourth time, I'm like, you have no idea,
like the journey and like what that that first marriage
(19:33):
is and not that he tried to kill me, you
know what I mean? Like so and then there's me
like trying to defend it again, but like okay, so
what so what She's been married four times? So what
I'm getting married these may times?
Speaker 3 (19:43):
Like okay, yeah, you.
Speaker 2 (19:45):
Know, like I'm not going to fault someone for loving
and trying. Yeah, you know, no for sure. And I
don't think she should, Like I don't feel like anyone
should have the hate and the nuggetivity around loving and trying.
Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't, and I hope. I
(20:06):
just can't imagine the uh that kind of circus of
publicly living like that trying to figure out because it's hard.
It's hard enough like being in a marriage closed closed doors.
Speaker 1 (20:16):
Well, and I think it also kind of shows both
sides of it, like you're you understand that side of it,
but like I think you can also under the stand
the side of like they are in the public eye
and we do talk about these things, like me and
you were talking about them, like, oh, what is going on?
I think there's a fine line, like people want to
know what's going on in people's lives. We're even guilty
(20:37):
of it. We're even like what is going on with Jen?
And you know?
Speaker 2 (20:41):
Like so I think they say that about our friend,
Like I'm like, oh, what's going on? How are you know?
Speaker 3 (20:46):
I'm just saying that.
Speaker 1 (20:47):
I Yes, I think I'm also kind of defending the
other side in a sense that.
Speaker 2 (20:53):
The people ask.
Speaker 1 (20:54):
Yeah, like the people that are asking. I don't defend
hate ever, but I do under stand people wanting to
know and the intrigue behind it. We've built this world
where it's like, even I want to know what's new
with you know, Jen and Ben? Now you know, so,
I just I understand that, but I think that like
(21:15):
until you're on the other side, like you have been,
of the hate behind it, then it's hard to understand
how that affects people.
Speaker 4 (21:34):
Ol.
Speaker 3 (21:34):
It's Rosselin Sanchez and Eric Winter. You he said Aja
the Hoop podcast host. Check out our episode with Ricky
Martin out now.
Speaker 4 (21:42):
Oh my god, guys. He's a fellow Puerto rican A
good friend. We talk parenthood, we talk TV, film, mental health, travel.
It is a conversation you can only have between friends,
So make sure you check it out.
Speaker 2 (21:56):
Now listen to he said Aado on America's number one
podcast Now Work, iHeart.
Speaker 4 (22:00):
Open Your Free, iHeart app and Search.
Speaker 2 (22:03):
He said, So, I don't even know if it's so
much the hate, but I think it's the failure so
like and this this is actually gonna get me like emotional.
But it's like you, I don't think people like do
you think I wanted to be married that many times?
Like truly like.
Speaker 3 (22:22):
You just want to find love.
Speaker 2 (22:23):
It's embarrassing, right right, Yeah.
Speaker 1 (22:27):
No, I mean that's I mean, that's such a that's
always been a really hard thing for you. And I
don't think people understand fully understand that, you know. And
it's I'm sure the same for her, and you know, like.
Speaker 2 (22:40):
That's why I feel bad for her almost Yeah, like
like I like want this for her as much as
I want it for me. There's the right for that
where it's like, oh, I just like I want her
to be so happy. They want everyone to happy. I
want happy, you.
Speaker 1 (22:52):
Know, And you all are the kind of the people
like that I mean, I don't know her. I'm just
making an assumption, but I know you're the kind of
person you wanted to get married once and be happy
for the rest of your life. Like my god, yeah,
that's like the most important thing to you. Like that's
what you But it's almost like you're you're embarrassed and
you're being faulted for trying to find true love and
that's not fair. But I understand the embarrassment behind it,
(23:14):
and I hate that.
Speaker 2 (23:16):
Well, it's just because everyone just reads like headlines and
so I just feel like, I mean, Alan is the
first person who I didn't feel like I had to
defend my past like normally, Like I went on this
one date with this guy and he was like, so
you've been married a lot, And that's always kind of
been the conversation where I'm like, yeah, when I was nineteen,
(23:38):
I met someone and I knew him for you know,
a few days went to Vegas. It was an idiot.
He tried to kill me. They and all that in court. Yeah,
I walked on the aisle to someone else and I
realized within a week that I made a stupid decision.
I was trying to be chosen. I was very young
and I was still like, had a lot to do,
but I knew it wasn't gonna work. And so those
two are like war marriages to me. Right, to me,
(24:02):
I always say, I've been married once, which was with Mike,
And do do people honestly think that I wanted to
not be in that marriage? Like I did not want
my husband to cheat on me countless times? Right, I
would have loved to have been married to him, you know.
Having said that, you know, I'm now grateful for, yeah,
(24:24):
the love that I do have now because it wasn't right.
But I did not want to get divorced. Yeah, Like
I would not have stayed for that many years affair
after affair, Right, I don't want that, but I do
want love, you know. And and so that's that's the
piece too, Like even just with the upcoming wedding, it's
(24:45):
there's embarrassment with it, and you know, people don't know
the whole story. They just see a headline and they
just go and they think with Jen too, like oh,
she's so you know X, Y and Z because she's
been married so many times. Well, no, she's just she's
growing and learning and we make mistakes and yeah, so
that's why I like, I'm just like, that's why I'm
an interested invested in it in a way because I
(25:07):
I have like this, I just want her to be happy.
Speaker 3 (25:10):
Yeah, you're rooting for him, Yeah.
Speaker 2 (25:13):
I want I'm rooting for like, you know, the the
love because it has been it's been a journey for her.
And whereas again where I just like, I'm not saying
I'm like j Lo, but marriage where I am. So
I want that like love for her and the happily
ever after because I feel in my soul that I
have my happily ever after and I'm so grateful now
(25:34):
for those past relationships that have led me to Alan.
Speaker 3 (25:39):
Yeah, sorry, you're fine.
Speaker 2 (25:42):
Well, because it's clearly like a that's my one piece
that like, yeah, you can throw, you can say all
the million things to me, but that's always the one
that like hurts because it's I have shame around it, yeah,
and I don't because it led me here. So it's
like it's it's like a twofold.
Speaker 1 (25:58):
Yeah, but also like we're I'm not supposed to feel
shame for our past. We're not like it led you
to a certain place, Like that's not what God wants
for you. He wants you to be to learn from that,
but he also is trying to show you like, yeah,
it was a windy road and all that, but like
if it wasn't for that.
Speaker 2 (26:16):
Yeah, and now I'm so grateful because I'm like, I
don't I can't imagine a world without Roman. I can't
imagine a world without Alan. Like I'm I'm I love
like I daily. I'm like, thank you, Mike, and you know,
to myself because I'm like, I know, I don't do
that anymore, but I did, you know, because I'm like,
this is a beautiful life that I'd never imagined I
could ever have, and a beautiful love and so I'm
(26:39):
not like I I And that's what even with Alan,
when I told him, I was like, do you want
to know about the things, And He's just like I
don't care. He's like, I love who you are and
how that's shaped you. And I mean, obviously he knows
now and we've talked about it. But that was one
of my favorite things about him when I first met him,
because he it didn't even make him flinch. Yeah, you know,
it didn't make me feel crazy, didn't make me feel
(27:00):
like I had to defend myself. He was just like,
you're a warrior and I love you and you know. Yeah,
so that again, that piece has been great and I'm
not like though there is pieces of shame in it.
It's just because of the comments and stuff. But I'm
so grateful for that path. Yeah done, moving on. Absolutely,
(27:24):
I just want everyone to be happy. That is the
take that. That is the headline that I just I
just want everyone to be happy.
Speaker 3 (27:33):
Oh what else?
Speaker 2 (27:36):
That's about all I got for you now that I'm yeah,
I don't know.
Speaker 3 (27:40):
That's this is what's going on in our world over here.
Speaker 2 (27:43):
I feel like I should just like lean into it though,
Like when I get on the plane, when I get
on the plane to go to Scotland for our wedding,
shed is be like fourth.
Speaker 3 (27:50):
Time here we go.
Speaker 2 (27:52):
I mean I feel I should just play into it.
Speaker 3 (27:54):
I feel like you should.
Speaker 1 (27:56):
I mean again, you're gonna have people saying things either way,
So either like make fun of yourself or.
Speaker 2 (28:03):
I kind of have like I did the other day
on the story, I'm like, never done the second dress.
I'd like if it just kind of makes me, you know, cackle.
You can't hurt me because it already hurt me more so,
I'm already doing it to myself people anyways, all right, Well,
on that note, we need to try on some bridesmaid
(28:24):
dresses that we have in the closet, so all right,
see you next way. See ya bye,
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