January 22, 2024 • 33 mins
Jana connects with her Dancing with the Stars friend Allison Holker Boss! They share some unforgettable memories from behind the scenes before Allison opens up about her new book.
If you’re a fan of Dancing with the Stars, or Allison’s late husband Twitch, you need to hear their conversation about why this story can help anyone going through a tough time.
Plus, find out why Jana went down a spiraling rabbit hole that all started with an itchy scalp.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Wind Down with Janet Kramer and I'm Heart Radio Podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
So today's episode, you guys, it's what's wrong my hair?
Can we talk about hair? I mean you, guys, I
try not to be vain. I'm just like, can a
girl like, can I just get hair for a second?
Speaker 3 (00:22):
Can we talk about does anyone notice anything? Are your
extensions gone? I thought you didn't blow dry? I'm not sure.
Always do sound quite vain? Right now?
Speaker 1 (00:33):
I like your butterflies all Diama, stay on topic. Butterflies,
that shiny squirrel?
Speaker 3 (00:43):
Okay, did you cut it?
Speaker 2 (00:45):
Well? This goes to the conversation that I had with
you earlier this morning about what I what I think
I have.
Speaker 3 (00:52):
I have no idea, so I want to say so
much about that?
Speaker 2 (00:57):
Can I?
Speaker 3 (00:57):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (00:58):
And no?
Speaker 3 (00:58):
Second, that's so clueless? What is happening?
Speaker 2 (01:02):
So it kind of goes along with our topics of
like when people say, okay, you know, like I gotta hey,
can you call me?
Speaker 3 (01:10):
And I was just like done, done, done, okay, go
ahead time now, So I'm not as conditioned. Do I
tell my side of the story first or do you
tell yours? I don't know they're funny either way. So
about let's.
Speaker 2 (01:25):
See I'm about two nope, about five weeks postpartum, y'all.
Speaker 3 (01:33):
I have.
Speaker 2 (01:34):
I have had the itchiest scalp. I mean, itching's so bad.
I'm like digging my nails into my head, like the
itchiest scalp. Right, And so I'm doctor Google, so I
go on and I'm just like googling.
Speaker 3 (01:46):
So so I go.
Speaker 2 (01:48):
On Google and they're like, oh, it's it's yeah, it's
like it could be your hormones or whatever. So I
don't think anything of it and it's probably gonna go away.
Speaker 3 (01:57):
I read some.
Speaker 2 (01:59):
Article like whatever those forums are, and it's like, yeah,
I had it too. Oh my gosh, crazy itchy scalp.
So she's doing it as I'm itching. My scalp's amazing.
So cut to after Christmas and I'm still just like
itching everywhere, and then it's like in the back of
my neck, in my ear and I'm like do I
have lice? Like why am I itching?
Speaker 3 (02:17):
Right?
Speaker 2 (02:18):
So I contact my doctor and I'm like, hey, I'm
like having such bad itching. Like it's actually depressing me
because I'm like something's wrong again, like you know, the
postpartum everything. I'm just kind of like, can I just
not have something going wrong, like versus is the kidney
it exists?
Speaker 3 (02:35):
Is that?
Speaker 2 (02:36):
And then the baby? And then I came to that
and so I'm like I'm so I'm like, now I'm itching,
like comfortable love, Yeah, it's just exists in your own
body for a second. Yeah, like I have to actively
choose not to scratch my head even though I feel
like I have to. So anyway, so I email the doctor.
I'm like, is this normal? She's like no, and I'm like, well,
you know what happens when someone tells me something is normal.
(02:57):
So now I'm yeah, may just problem like I have.
Speaker 3 (02:59):
M Yes, I have.
Speaker 2 (03:00):
Because it's like there's all the things of like what
it like causes itching or whatever. So she's like, I
would recommend going to see a dermatologist. So I'm like, okay,
So I go see doctor Lee and she's amazing. She
does my botox like she's great. So she also like
her main things like she's a very like she's a
very good dermatologist.
Speaker 3 (03:19):
And so she's.
Speaker 2 (03:19):
Looking and she's like why don't She's like, you have
no dandriff. So it's not anything dry your your scalp. Look,
there's no nothing on your scalp. She's like, and then
you know, she's looking anywhere. I was like, well, this
itch is over here, and like this, I have a
random itch here and like this kind of itches. And
she's like, there's no bumps, there's no hot I'm like, then,
what is it?
Speaker 4 (03:38):
Right?
Speaker 2 (03:38):
And so then she draws an AX on my arm right,
so I'm gonna do it right here. So she draws
an AX on my arm and then she does an
X on the lady in the office. My skin makes
an AX. So if we were to do an AX
on yours like mine in about one minute will look
like a big red AX. So there's something in my
body that's like an autoimmune that's attacking. Something's attacking my
(03:59):
body and we don't know what it is. So because
like the other lady h hers didn't have an X,
and mine that gets a red X because it's my
skin reacting whatever. So she's like, I need to take
some blood work from you. And I'm like, doctor, not really,
like what do I have. She's like, no, right, I
(04:22):
was like, but what could it be? She's like, I
have some fear. So like I see it's turning to
be an X right there. It's like red red X.
You would not have that if I did that to you,
So listen to this.
Speaker 3 (04:31):
So I kind of want to test, so I do that.
Speaker 2 (04:35):
So she's like, well, it could be a couple of things,
and I'm like, break it down. What am I dying of?
You know, because I go straight to like I'm dying.
She's like, you could have lupus. You could have kidney failure,
kidney disease. And I'm like kidney. Oh my god. Oh
so I spoilal because I'm like all that kidney issue
I had. I go doctor Lee, I had like massive
(04:56):
kidney infections when I was pregnant. And she's like, it
could be the napps your kidney and so I'm gonna
need you to go, like right now, to go get
like some blood work, just like because it could be
like you're saying that your kidneys are feeling So no,
look where I ride my AXSS not marim.
Speaker 3 (05:09):
So I'm like, oh my god. So I'm like googling.
Speaker 2 (05:13):
Kidney disease and I'm like I'm giving myself one week
to live. Like it's like okdating, Like it's bad. So
I go and you know, it could be a few
it could be my thyroid. A thyroid also causes itching
if it's like a high whatever. So you see how yeah,
so interesting? Uh huh. So I go, so my my
(05:35):
levels come back, She's like, you're a little low, and
like a few of the things. She's like, but nothing
that causes kidney, nothing that causes thyroid, nothing that you
don't have lupus. And so I'm like, okay, then what
is it? Because I can not stop itching. So the
other night and again I don't know if this is
actually what it is, but now I'm going to go,
like further look into this because I cannot figure it out.
And now I'm like a month and a half in
(05:56):
and I'm like driving myself nuts right with this itch
and the take took my extension out, like maybe it's
something with my extensions randomly like so I'm like I'm
smart and eliminating everything. I took away every supplement, every
like everything, like nothing has changed in my diet, nothing,
nothing at all.
Speaker 3 (06:13):
So sorry scratching a life pause for a head scratch.
Speaker 2 (06:18):
So the other day I'm like, I see Jolie itching
your head and I'm like, give me your arm. So
I make an X on her arm and her arm
does look at you see this, it's still a red
in mine? But do you see I'm doing mine? You
see my red X? Right, Yeah, it's still red. So
he's been doing the same thing. So I'm very curious.
So I and I'm looking at her. I was like, holy,
(06:42):
she's got a red X. And so I text doctor
Lee and I was like, not sure if these two
are connected, but I'm trying to figure this out. Do
you see how like long mine's still staying there though
X you guys this this this episode would be called
X Marx the Spot, but yeah, so anyways, so I'm like,
give you it could be called if you're looking, Oh,
(07:03):
here's just going right?
Speaker 3 (07:04):
I know, I'm quite can can you get too quickly?
So no?
Speaker 2 (07:11):
So well, so what I texted Doctor Lee with and
her I'm just going to tending to text it's really red?
Speaker 3 (07:17):
What do we have? How hard did you scratch it?
I mean I did scratch it to like see you
gotta like yeah, so do that one.
Speaker 2 (07:29):
So you keep that one? Okay, so quickly, what am
I diagnosedes?
Speaker 3 (07:34):
What text?
Speaker 2 (07:35):
So I text actually and I go, she goes, how
do you feeling? I go, still still itching? Scalp and
the exit on my arm. My daughter said, her head
scratches and her arm made an X. But maybe that's
just coincidence. She goes, Oh, and maybe you guys have scabies.
And I'm like, what the fuck is that?
Speaker 3 (07:50):
Did I get on this couch?
Speaker 1 (07:52):
I'm like, I can promise you right now you do
not remember I had it years ago.
Speaker 3 (07:57):
It's scaby. It's the worst thing I've ever been through
in my entire life. Okay, well under your skin.
Speaker 1 (08:04):
I know you don't remember. I stayed home for like months.
Speaker 3 (08:07):
What is it? Because the name of it sounds.
Speaker 1 (08:09):
It's terrible, And I can promise you you wouldn't be
able to sleep.
Speaker 3 (08:14):
No, I can't. I have to take sleeping pills because
the itching. Do you would see marks? Though you would
have ration stuff? I do have that. Ex Do I
have this?
Speaker 2 (08:22):
Or is this just a human response to scratching yourself?
Because I swear the well, then what is the itching?
Speaker 1 (08:29):
I mean it was, and again we weren't one hundred
percent that that's what I had, but I mean it
was the most miserable I've ever been. And I mean,
you itch your entire but it's awful unless it's just
getting what.
Speaker 3 (08:40):
You should.
Speaker 1 (08:42):
Want to look up look it up and there's like
these lines that will show up on your skin.
Speaker 3 (08:49):
Have you never admitted that?
Speaker 2 (08:51):
But it was terrible, But like why would it randomly?
Thank you for sharing that with us and being so authentic.
Speaker 3 (08:55):
Well, I mean I still don't know.
Speaker 1 (08:56):
I mean I had traveled a lot, but like nice hotels,
like nothing grow not you know, whatever.
Speaker 3 (09:01):
What do you get? Is it like a contact thing?
Speaker 1 (09:03):
It's like, yeah, yeah, it would have had to have
been from like infected like sheets somewhere or something. But
I mean I hadn't stayed anywhere or not grown you know,
I hadn't who knows how, But it's it's like the
most embarrassing. I was in the middle of summer. I'd
go to soft baseball games and I'd wear full long sleeves.
Speaker 2 (09:20):
Last it was months for me. Is it perpetuated by
something like? That's why I was like, have you eaten gluten?
Maybe it's your body's reaction to gluten.
Speaker 3 (09:28):
It just wouldn't randomly happen, I feel like.
Speaker 1 (09:31):
But also side note to this, I'm literally dealing with
the same thing with immy. This is so interesting chicking
at her head seeing if there's there's no dandriff, there's
no like she can't stop.
Speaker 3 (09:43):
Oh my god, I've got lasting I've been using.
Speaker 1 (09:48):
Like she'll be out there at tumbling and she can't stop.
I'm like, you look like a dog, like sketching yourself.
Speaker 3 (09:54):
We looked.
Speaker 1 (09:54):
I looked for lice, like I literally she was like,
will you just take me to a lice place and
make sure, Like that's how much she's it.
Speaker 3 (10:00):
We have to figure this out on her.
Speaker 1 (10:03):
But I told her whatever shampoo she's been using, to
just eliminate it, Like we're just gonna eliminate things.
Speaker 2 (10:09):
So I want saying, but like not working, like literally not.
I'm like I don't so like if you figured it out,
let me know.
Speaker 3 (10:15):
I mean, that's crazy.
Speaker 2 (10:16):
I get very doctor house about stuff like that. Still
doesn't help. Like so it's like it's something in mine
still there is you're still.
Speaker 3 (10:22):
And it's dry weather, So what does that mean?
Speaker 2 (10:25):
I have something that my body is fighting that's causing
the reaction. So something is in.
Speaker 1 (10:30):
Having a reaction to stuff is like that's what alopecia is.
It's like you're it attacks the hair follicles in your
you know, your hair falls out or whatever and that's
an autoimmune so it's all very similar, but we're.
Speaker 2 (10:40):
Both post part does that matter yours isn't really like
m I'd like to do it, okay, but I just
wonder if it's something to do with like our bodies
getting back in balance.
Speaker 3 (10:53):
I don't know, but why that because my head.
Speaker 1 (10:56):
I know that's if we could all if someone could
let us know who I.
Speaker 2 (11:00):
Yeah, because it's driving me mad and I'm like, I
just I can't do it. But the funny thing was,
is I just, you know, just dealing with some things.
And so I haven't called back Kristen. And then I said, hey,
can you can you call? Can you call me? Call
me back? And you run the phone right. So Monday
I text her. I get nothing back. Fine, totally fine,
(11:23):
she's in postpartum. I give grace on grace and grace right.
I'm not that girl. Yesterday a facetimer because I'm like,
I just want to see you, like a little visual
check in. I like to get like a temperature read
you know, no answer, huh. So then I send her
the song I just called to say I love you,
because I thought maybe she just needs to know that
that's okay.
Speaker 3 (11:42):
Wherever she is no answer nothing.
Speaker 2 (11:45):
And then today quick call thought it was a butt
dial though, like I missed it, but that was weird.
I was working by my phone. Then I get a hey,
can you call me? I call her, go straight to voicemail.
I'm like, okay, alrighty, what are we dealing with? And
then and then I said to sweet Christine, who's at
my house, I said it's weird, and she goes, well,
(12:05):
are you worried? And I said no, not really, because
the thing with Jana is it could be, hey, can
you call me? I have a scab on my toe,
or you're fired from mind down, like it could be
any of the things. And I just think there's not
anything we can't handle.
Speaker 3 (12:15):
So that I call her. She's if you could.
Speaker 2 (12:16):
I was like, I was like, yeah, I got talk
to something, but I might also have scabies, and she's like,
oh my god, this is home.
Speaker 3 (12:21):
I was like, right on this, right on target.
Speaker 2 (12:23):
Yeah. Anyways, okay, we've we've kept it very light. Our
next guest is in the waiting room, and in this one,
it's so hard because I don't know what to say.
She obviously lost her husband twitch to suicide over a
year ago, and I knew her from It's Alison Holker
Boss from Dancing with the Stars, and I knew knew
(12:43):
I was on her season when she was on there,
and it's just like, what do you even say?
Speaker 3 (12:47):
And so I had to be.
Speaker 2 (12:49):
Really like, I'll be honest, probably will cry during this episode.
But I had to be like really prayerful yeah about
all of this, because I, you know, like I've shared
with you, had a really similar ark times in life
where like that was an option in my brain. Sure,
so I think that is what is It's just I
(13:09):
don't know. I'm just I had to be like I
was like, I don't know, I just was really prayerful. Well,
let's take a break get around. But first I have
to ask Hannah Jackie Easton, did you guys do the
X and do you have an X on your arm?
Speaker 4 (13:20):
I did? I knew you guys. I knew you guys
are doing it.
Speaker 3 (13:23):
Like I'm like, there's no screens off vaccine? Do you guys?
Speaker 2 (13:27):
Does it?
Speaker 3 (13:28):
Is it still there? No mind thought the one you
did isn't really super there. Yeah, You're just the whole.
Speaker 1 (13:34):
Time though you guys are talking about it.
Speaker 3 (13:36):
I was crashing my head.
Speaker 2 (13:38):
Well, I know now I feel like I have an
itchy sculptor from association.
Speaker 3 (13:41):
All right, anyways, let's take a break and they'll get
alicon on.
Speaker 4 (13:57):
I love how are you?
Speaker 3 (13:59):
I love you?
Speaker 2 (14:00):
I love your energy always, and I just remember when
I did Dance with the Stars and you were obviously
the pro that season with babyface, right, yes, And I
just remember like you were just so like your energy
was amazing. You were so sweet, so welcoming, and like
I just really I've always like appreciated that and like
you're just a beautiful soul. So thank you for always
(14:22):
being that and sharing that with other people too.
Speaker 4 (14:28):
Thank you. I appreciate that you're so kind. I remember
we had so much fun that season. It was really wonderful.
Everyone was great. It felt like a little family was awesome.
So I'm happy to be here.
Speaker 3 (14:38):
Yeah, you're sweet. Do I start?
Speaker 4 (14:41):
Well?
Speaker 3 (14:41):
I love you.
Speaker 2 (14:42):
It's just aggressive to say, how loud. But it's funny
because I don't scroll anymore on Instagram. I kind of
made a promise to myself, but if I ever see you,
I always click because you're fun, your outfits are fun
and you're always moving. So I'm not a dancer, but
I married a dancer. Ish Pasa is not a dancer,
he used. I don't know how much he would want
(15:04):
me to share publicly. He's not like a dancer, like
cool like choreographers. Wait you know, but again he's are
you serious? Yeah, he's getting a text later. It's like
backstreet boys, like he will pull out some moves, so
we will always We always have watched you and your
late husband because he was like, look at these two together,
something I could never do.
Speaker 3 (15:22):
I can't five six seven eight to save my life.
Speaker 2 (15:24):
So I would always be like, well, then we can
just watch them because they're amazing and beautiful.
Speaker 3 (15:28):
But I've always enjoyed thoroughly.
Speaker 2 (15:32):
Just your presence, like how much fun, how much life
and light you guys have shared with your world. And
we dance party at our house to mostly to shake
up my own sads. I've struggled with bouts of depression
a lot, actually, but we dance to get that out.
But it's not nearly as choreographed and cute as you.
But we do dance in our kitchen. It's a little
(15:53):
less hot. But I've just always really appreciated your presence.
And I will say this and we don't have to
stay here. But I just want you to know that,
like the moment I found out about the passing of
your husband, it was an absolute gut punch, as I
know I can't even imagine obviously, but for the rest
(16:14):
of the world being on our side of things, it
was so unexpected feeling because he is such a light.
And I think that is the one thing that I
wish people knew more about, was that that is always
there too for people that struggle with anything that is dark,
that we can dance it out and we can move
(16:35):
and through those things. But like you, guys are so
loved and you will stay so loved, And I'm just
so thankful that you got to share your world with us.
From my seat in the world.
Speaker 4 (16:46):
Thank you. That's really sweet. I appreciate everything you just said,
and you know it's I wish and I hope that
we can bring more awareness to mental health and make
people feel more comfortable when they need to ask for
help and when they need to talk something out, and
making them feel seen and heard, where you're not going
(17:10):
to be looked at different if you ask for help,
and I think that's a big thing and a big stigma,
specifically for men. Really that no one's going to look
down on you just because you might need a little
bit of an extra hug or a talk, or need
to go somewhere, need to find somewhere, whatever it is
that you're struggling with. I just hope that we can
change that stigma and really bring awareness that having a
(17:32):
talk with someone does not make you and make you
look small or feel small to someone else.
Speaker 2 (17:38):
I think we as a society need to be more
mindful the way we parent boys in general, just because
I you know, like I don't know and parenting just
the intention with parenting period. But I do agree with
everything you're saying. There's a certain pressure or stigma put
on them as a gender that doesn't feel fair too,
and like you have to be big and brave in
all the things. In reality, you're still just the person
(18:00):
and God made you and loves you well. And I'll
say too, Allison again, we're gonna we're going to go
to the other side of this. But you know, I
think one of the things that made me like, I
like started crying the first time, like I saw you
dance again and I was like, wow, like what a
beautiful like she's she's she's dancing and she's moving through
(18:22):
grief like that, and I think that gives so much
to other people that are going through the same thing.
And you're helping more people than you know. And and
with this book you have coming out keep dancing through
a boss family groove like you know, it's it's out now,
people can get it. It's by you and and twitch,
So when did you guys write it? What's the message
(18:45):
through it? Because I just love all our listeners to
know about it, to get the words spread it and
and yeah, like when did you guys write it? And
when you know? Is this when it was supposed to
be released or did you hold it? Like what was
kind of the whole thing?
Speaker 4 (19:00):
Okay, So we wrote this book back in twenty twenty one,
and we wrote it because I've always had a dream
of writing a children's book ever since I had my
first daughter, Wesley, who's now fifteen. So this has been
something I've been putting into the ecosystem and manifesting for
fifteen years. And you know, work gets away from you,
life gets away from you. And when we had Zia,
(19:25):
my youngest daughter, who's now four, when we had her,
I was what a brilliant time to not just you know,
share our family on social media and continue to these
TV shows, but really share our family's story and paper,
you know, in book form, and we wanted to share
(19:46):
a day in the life of our family. And I
think it's something that's really special that the God and
universe really worked with us in our favor, because it's
a testament to who we were and who we will
still be as a family. Because truly, honestly, this book,
it just takes you through a day of our lives.
(20:07):
And I've always been a really big manifestor I believe
in affirmations, and I do all these things every single morning.
And I've been teaching my children this for years. And
so what the book is is the following the day
in the life of each of my kids going through
a struggle, and the words that we use to get
them out of those struggles, and the things we've been
teaching them for them to be able to lean on
(20:27):
each other. And why I tell you all those things
is because after everything happened to me a year ago,
there was a lot of discussions if we even wanted
to launch the book. You know, for me, there was
moments of maybe I want to hold this book selfishly,
just for me and the kids, and not let anyone
(20:49):
else have it, and let it be a book that
my kids can read and look back on these beautiful
times and this beautiful memory that we share. Anyways, I
didn't know if I wanted to hold onto it to
just be something for us. And then I read the
book again, and I looked at the messaging and I
(21:09):
reread the title. All of these things were done. The
book was written, the illustrations were done, the title was done.
And I told Disney, I was like, this is all
I can do is keep dancing through. And this is
what I'm going to tell my children, and this is
what Steven would want me to do, and this is
what I need to do. And if I'm going to
say anything to anybody that's been following my family's journey
(21:32):
and supporting my family, and you know, people have been
following my journey since I was eighteen, of following his
journey since he was like you know, however, you know
twenty twenty two when he first doing his shows, and
they've watched us grow, and they've watched us become a family,
and they've supported us and they loved us. And if
I was going to say anything to anyone, I would
tell them to keep dancing through. And so the reason
(21:53):
I carried forward to bring this book and actually put
it back out there in the world for one else
to be able to share is because I wanted to
give back and share that we can keep dancing through.
And that's what I would want, and that's what I
want to I'm going to do, is what I'm going
to teach my children to do, and I hope to
let other people know that it's okay to keep dancing through.
(22:15):
So it's something that's really really special to my kids
and something special to me. And I really know that
Stephen would want this and in honor of him as well.
Speaker 2 (22:25):
Yeah, I love that message too, especially for people that
are dealing with grief too, because you know, even our
friend Kelly who lost her husband, she's like, what's the timeline?
When can I like be like, it's actually I don't
want to like look like I'm too HAPPI or like
can I you know, it's just because I'm still grieving
and I'll always be grieving. She's like, but no matter what,
like you just you you dance through it, you get
(22:46):
through it, and you're showing people that, like you can
still be both and you can carry both and you
can do it gracefully, and and yeah, that's that's it's
it's I can't imagine it, but I love that the
message that you're putting out there, because I think people
would maybe feel bad for dancing or being happy, you know,
(23:08):
or trying or you know what I mean, Like that's.
Speaker 1 (23:09):
Showing to the world that they're happy. Like I remember
Kelly talking about that. Yeah, you know, people have an
idea of what the timeline should be, right, but I'm
showing something other than that.
Speaker 3 (23:19):
Am I not, you know, doing it right or you
know whatever?
Speaker 2 (23:35):
I do think you I wanted to pull it up
so that I wasn't miss speaking because I don't have
my copy with me.
Speaker 3 (23:41):
But I think what was super special.
Speaker 2 (23:46):
I live for kids books, like I love kids books,
and I think it's so special to be able to
share your family with my kids, like it's just neat,
you know, So thank you first of all for taking
like the leap and going.
Speaker 3 (23:59):
I do want to share.
Speaker 2 (23:59):
This because it is so cool to be a mom
and be able to like read different life paths with kids.
You know, what I thought was really neat about it
that I don't feel like you're not going to probably
toot your own horn. But there's this like really sweet,
rhythmic piece of it that is not a normal family
(24:20):
that I would say is pretty exclusive to like your household.
From what we have seen of you is just as
like you know, followers. But there's something like like beboppy
about the way it's written that I think is really
special and like pretty unique to your family.
Speaker 3 (24:36):
And I think that is pretty cool. So tell me, does.
Speaker 2 (24:38):
That feel like a little bit of the like curtain
pulled back to expose that piece of your family? Because
to me, that's who you guys are. But I've never
seen that really in a kid's book, I don't think ever.
Speaker 4 (24:50):
For me, that was I'm so happy that you caught
that because that actually is something that we've been hoping for.
Music is such a huge part of our family and
how we live our lives and move through lives. We
always have music playing and it kind of guides us
and the emotions and the toll and the energy that
my house has. And so we really wanted to have
(25:11):
this rhythmical vibe to the book without it being about music,
you know, But really having this tone that kind of
follows a rhythm that it almost feels like while you're
reading it, you're kind of moving back and forth with it,
which is why it's you know, I'm strong, I'm smart
and kind got beats around me too, you know, take
some deep breaths in and out and all keep dancing
through it. Kind of we wanted it to feel like
(25:33):
it had this like motion to it in the words,
and so I'm glad that you call onto that, but
it is it's such an important thing for us and
my kids. I mean, listen my kids their vocabulary when
it comes to music. As Chef's kiss, it's beautiful, but
it is true. So thank you for catching that. And
we've hoped that people would feel that when they read
(25:54):
the book.
Speaker 3 (25:55):
Well, it's exciting.
Speaker 2 (25:56):
I have a little I'm raising a little beatboxer, So
that part to him is what's so cool? Is that
like beat boxy, like you know, the zip zip zip zip,
like whatever the toothbrushing piece of it is or whatever.
Like everything to him is a song. So I think
that's just pretty neat and it's just kind of fun.
It's like crazy to me to connect on pages the
(26:16):
music piece of that. We're a music family, so we
try to keep music around. But I also just love
silence a lot, So I feel like I'm not as
jam out.
Speaker 3 (26:23):
As I should be, but it is.
Speaker 2 (26:25):
I just feel like it's really a way, it's a
very unique way to connect musically from something you're just
reading and it's not a sing song y, you know,
Like it's just a really unique way to do that.
And I just truly appreciate the sharing of that.
Speaker 4 (26:40):
Thank you, thank you. Yeah, you know. For me with
the book, it's the rhythm. But like the biggest message
I hope that people realize and take away from the
book is really the affirmations in it though, you know,
my children every single morning, my kids, it's really like
it's my favorite moment with my kids every morning. They
are by saying I'm strong, I'm smart, I'm own kind,
(27:02):
Maddox is handsome, And it's just kind of a way
for us to connect. And I think it's good to
instill in children confidence, encourage and talking kindly to themselves,
because you talk to yourself more than anybody else's right,
Like we have such inner dialogue with ourselves, you know.
(27:24):
All the time. I'm trying to teach my children that
you have to speak kindly to yourself because you can't
rely on happiness from someone else. You can't rely on
this from someone else. You have to do it for yourself.
So I'm just trying to encourage you know, being nice
and speaking highly of yourself and encouraging yourself and lifting
your spirits yourself and being your your own advocate in life.
Speaker 2 (27:46):
You know, yeah, because the world's going to beat you
down and tell you that you're not and you have
to be strong enough to know, okay, you know all
the things that we're affirming and having our kids affirm
to themselves that they're like, no, actually, I don't care
that you don't like me and you're being and like,
I know, I'm uwesome because since seven years old, my
mom's were saying I'm enough, I'm brave, because like Jolie
has in her room too, she's like, I'm brave, I'm beautiful,
(28:07):
I'm strong, I'm kind She's like, and I am Jolie Ray.
And there's a few more things like I'm enough and
m every day I'm like there you go, baby, like
say say it all you know so And because I don't,
I don't think I got that as a kid, I
was gonna ask so yeah. So I'm like to me,
I'm like, I need her to know because it's like
she's I don't know. This is probably awful to say,
like and probably a therapist be like, that's really bad.
(28:28):
But sometimes I look at her like, what, what did
my little child? Like? She's like my almost little child,
like that one that was hurt inside me. So I'm like,
I gotta love her and protect her and like, you know,
make sure I choose my words carefully, like what would
I want as my little girl that was injured or
that was wounded?
Speaker 1 (28:43):
Right, you know, want to hear I think we all
have to do that because she didn't get Yeah.
Speaker 2 (28:48):
Does that is it feel like something you're passing down
because you had that, or is it feel like something
you wish you had more of? And so you're determined
to kind of like change the narrative of your family
history from here forward.
Speaker 4 (29:01):
The first time I ever really started playing with affirmations,
I was twenty years old. It is something that I
now have been doing for so long in my life,
and I attest to the way I live my life
through this. I do it every single morning. Every single morning,
I start my day by getting ready, do my hair
and makeup, and I'm talking to myself and I probably
(29:23):
sound like a crazy hum but I'm going through all
my affirmations and I'm doing it and it's meant so
much to me, and it's changed my life and it's
helped me through so many hard times in my life.
So for me, I wanted to teach it to my
kids at an earlier age so they, you know, can
(29:43):
get through the hardest times of their life through it
and with it as well. But I've been doing it
for a really, really long time, and I have such
a plethora and different arrangement of types of affirmations and
manifestations that I say and do. The newest one with
my kids that I do, though, which is, oh, it's
my favorite, is I say we do the and they
(30:03):
finish it out by saying the hard things. And I
do that one because I cold plunge every morning and
it's quite literally one of the hardest things I do.
Speaker 2 (30:15):
That's a miserable pandas and I'm like, nope, no, no.
I think as we were raised in Michigan, we feel
like we filled our quota, so we.
Speaker 3 (30:21):
Don't have to do those things anymore. Yeah, we're like, no,
actually not charming.
Speaker 4 (30:28):
But it's it's something that I really believe in and
I've seen the benefits of it, and it's well, I've
been having this really hard year. I think it's a
really big thing that I do it, and I'm it's
been really helpful for my children as well.
Speaker 2 (30:45):
That's one thing I really want to do. And I
am not like you just started doing this kind of
an assignment.
Speaker 3 (30:52):
Oh yeah from Alan? Oh yeah, yeah, and this is silly.
I'm forty two years old.
Speaker 2 (31:00):
I cannot I want to be able to be I
want to be able to stand in front of a
mirror and say those things.
Speaker 3 (31:07):
I'm not a challenge you for a week to do it.
I'm going to write you what you have to say.
You to read it. I all want to do it. Well, well, yeah,
but I do know.
Speaker 2 (31:14):
It changes your frequency, it changes the way you think,
the way you feel like of course, right, I just
don't know why I can't get out of my own way.
Speaker 4 (31:22):
But that's the hard part of it, you know, is
you know it's easy to say things like fleeting, but
you've got to look yourself in the mirror, like that
is the biggest part of it that you have to
do that I sometimes think that people miss is you
have to be like staring at yourself and seeing yourself
and saying it to yourself in that way. And it's
just a game changer, is because it you're seeing yourself,
(31:45):
You're looking at yourself, you know. And I always say
too that. I think it's also the discipline of doing it.
And I know that sounds wild and like, well, you know,
you're just talking and blah blah blah. But I've done
it every single morning I was twenty and I'm now
thirty five, and I do not I do not let
it get away from me. It's I do it every
(32:05):
single morning. So it's like the discipline and the habit
of it and the act of it that's really gone
me through.
Speaker 2 (32:12):
Love that well, Allison, thank you for coming on. Everyone
get keep dancing through a Boss Family Groove by Allison
Boss and Twitch. So thank you so much, appreciate you
coming on.
Speaker 4 (32:22):
Thank you guys, Thank you, glad to be okay, Bye
you guys.
Speaker 3 (32:26):
Bye.
Speaker 2 (32:28):
If I was here, I would start my mornings with
like a boss. Like a boss, go get them girl,
like a oos. Guys, that was a good episode. I'm
gonna just scratch away.
Speaker 3 (32:40):
Scratch that we come up with an answer. Scratch that.
Oh that's another one has the answer for us.
Speaker 2 (32:45):
So I wanted to do this on Instagram, but I
didn't want we kind to get a sponsorship somewhere. What
this is like a very head and shoulders moment, but
it's not know but do you okay? So weather has
to be a because it's a friend.
Speaker 3 (33:01):
I'm not dry. I'm not dry. I'm not I mean,
i'm dry, but my head's not like I don't know, girl,
it's weird, but apparently it's not common. And please, if
you have like lines, show up, let me know. I'll
look at it and see. Oh my god, I can't. Okay,
we got all. We're gonna stop.
Speaker 2 (33:21):
Okay, have a great night or day
Wind Down with Janet Kramer and I'm Heart Radio Podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
So today's episode, you guys, it's what's wrong my hair?
Can we talk about hair? I mean you, guys, I
try not to be vain. I'm just like, can a
girl like, can I just get hair for a second?
Speaker 3 (00:22):
Can we talk about does anyone notice anything? Are your
extensions gone? I thought you didn't blow dry? I'm not sure.
Always do sound quite vain? Right now?
Speaker 1 (00:33):
I like your butterflies all Diama, stay on topic. Butterflies,
that shiny squirrel?
Speaker 3 (00:43):
Okay, did you cut it?
Speaker 2 (00:45):
Well? This goes to the conversation that I had with
you earlier this morning about what I what I think
I have.
Speaker 3 (00:52):
I have no idea, so I want to say so
much about that?
Speaker 2 (00:57):
Can I?
Speaker 3 (00:57):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (00:58):
And no?
Speaker 3 (00:58):
Second, that's so clueless? What is happening?
Speaker 2 (01:02):
So it kind of goes along with our topics of
like when people say, okay, you know, like I gotta hey,
can you call me?
Speaker 3 (01:10):
And I was just like done, done, done, okay, go
ahead time now, So I'm not as conditioned. Do I
tell my side of the story first or do you
tell yours? I don't know they're funny either way. So
about let's.
Speaker 2 (01:25):
See I'm about two nope, about five weeks postpartum, y'all.
Speaker 3 (01:33):
I have.
Speaker 2 (01:34):
I have had the itchiest scalp. I mean, itching's so bad.
I'm like digging my nails into my head, like the
itchiest scalp. Right, And so I'm doctor Google, so I
go on and I'm just like googling.
Speaker 3 (01:46):
So so I go.
Speaker 2 (01:48):
On Google and they're like, oh, it's it's yeah, it's
like it could be your hormones or whatever. So I
don't think anything of it and it's probably gonna go away.
Speaker 3 (01:57):
I read some.
Speaker 2 (01:59):
Article like whatever those forums are, and it's like, yeah,
I had it too. Oh my gosh, crazy itchy scalp.
So she's doing it as I'm itching. My scalp's amazing.
So cut to after Christmas and I'm still just like
itching everywhere, and then it's like in the back of
my neck, in my ear and I'm like do I
have lice? Like why am I itching?
Speaker 3 (02:17):
Right?
Speaker 2 (02:18):
So I contact my doctor and I'm like, hey, I'm
like having such bad itching. Like it's actually depressing me
because I'm like something's wrong again, like you know, the
postpartum everything. I'm just kind of like, can I just
not have something going wrong, like versus is the kidney
it exists?
Speaker 3 (02:35):
Is that?
Speaker 2 (02:36):
And then the baby? And then I came to that
and so I'm like I'm so I'm like, now I'm itching,
like comfortable love, Yeah, it's just exists in your own
body for a second. Yeah, like I have to actively
choose not to scratch my head even though I feel
like I have to. So anyway, so I email the doctor.
I'm like, is this normal? She's like no, and I'm like, well,
you know what happens when someone tells me something is normal.
(02:57):
So now I'm yeah, may just problem like I have.
Speaker 3 (02:59):
M Yes, I have.
Speaker 2 (03:00):
Because it's like there's all the things of like what
it like causes itching or whatever. So she's like, I
would recommend going to see a dermatologist. So I'm like, okay,
So I go see doctor Lee and she's amazing. She
does my botox like she's great. So she also like
her main things like she's a very like she's a
very good dermatologist.
Speaker 3 (03:19):
And so she's.
Speaker 2 (03:19):
Looking and she's like why don't She's like, you have
no dandriff. So it's not anything dry your your scalp. Look,
there's no nothing on your scalp. She's like, and then
you know, she's looking anywhere. I was like, well, this
itch is over here, and like this, I have a
random itch here and like this kind of itches. And
she's like, there's no bumps, there's no hot I'm like, then,
what is it?
Speaker 4 (03:38):
Right?
Speaker 2 (03:38):
And so then she draws an AX on my arm right,
so I'm gonna do it right here. So she draws
an AX on my arm and then she does an
X on the lady in the office. My skin makes
an AX. So if we were to do an AX
on yours like mine in about one minute will look
like a big red AX. So there's something in my
body that's like an autoimmune that's attacking. Something's attacking my
(03:59):
body and we don't know what it is. So because
like the other lady h hers didn't have an X,
and mine that gets a red X because it's my
skin reacting whatever. So she's like, I need to take
some blood work from you. And I'm like, doctor, not really,
like what do I have. She's like, no, right, I
(04:22):
was like, but what could it be? She's like, I
have some fear. So like I see it's turning to
be an X right there. It's like red red X.
You would not have that if I did that to you,
So listen to this.
Speaker 3 (04:31):
So I kind of want to test, so I do that.
Speaker 2 (04:35):
So she's like, well, it could be a couple of things,
and I'm like, break it down. What am I dying of?
You know, because I go straight to like I'm dying.
She's like, you could have lupus. You could have kidney failure,
kidney disease. And I'm like kidney. Oh my god. Oh
so I spoilal because I'm like all that kidney issue
I had. I go doctor Lee, I had like massive
(04:56):
kidney infections when I was pregnant. And she's like, it
could be the napps your kidney and so I'm gonna
need you to go, like right now, to go get
like some blood work, just like because it could be
like you're saying that your kidneys are feeling So no,
look where I ride my AXSS not marim.
Speaker 3 (05:09):
So I'm like, oh my god. So I'm like googling.
Speaker 2 (05:13):
Kidney disease and I'm like I'm giving myself one week
to live. Like it's like okdating, Like it's bad. So
I go and you know, it could be a few
it could be my thyroid. A thyroid also causes itching
if it's like a high whatever. So you see how yeah,
so interesting? Uh huh. So I go, so my my
(05:35):
levels come back, She's like, you're a little low, and
like a few of the things. She's like, but nothing
that causes kidney, nothing that causes thyroid, nothing that you
don't have lupus. And so I'm like, okay, then what
is it? Because I can not stop itching. So the
other night and again I don't know if this is
actually what it is, but now I'm going to go,
like further look into this because I cannot figure it out.
And now I'm like a month and a half in
(05:56):
and I'm like driving myself nuts right with this itch
and the take took my extension out, like maybe it's
something with my extensions randomly like so I'm like I'm
smart and eliminating everything. I took away every supplement, every
like everything, like nothing has changed in my diet, nothing,
nothing at all.
Speaker 3 (06:13):
So sorry scratching a life pause for a head scratch.
Speaker 2 (06:18):
So the other day I'm like, I see Jolie itching
your head and I'm like, give me your arm. So
I make an X on her arm and her arm
does look at you see this, it's still a red
in mine? But do you see I'm doing mine? You
see my red X? Right, Yeah, it's still red. So
he's been doing the same thing. So I'm very curious.
So I and I'm looking at her. I was like, holy,
(06:42):
she's got a red X. And so I text doctor
Lee and I was like, not sure if these two
are connected, but I'm trying to figure this out. Do
you see how like long mine's still staying there though
X you guys this this this episode would be called
X Marx the Spot, but yeah, so anyways, so I'm like,
give you it could be called if you're looking, Oh,
(07:03):
here's just going right?
Speaker 3 (07:04):
I know, I'm quite can can you get too quickly?
So no?
Speaker 2 (07:11):
So well, so what I texted Doctor Lee with and
her I'm just going to tending to text it's really red?
Speaker 3 (07:17):
What do we have? How hard did you scratch it?
I mean I did scratch it to like see you
gotta like yeah, so do that one.
Speaker 2 (07:29):
So you keep that one? Okay, so quickly, what am
I diagnosedes?
Speaker 3 (07:34):
What text?
Speaker 2 (07:35):
So I text actually and I go, she goes, how
do you feeling? I go, still still itching? Scalp and
the exit on my arm. My daughter said, her head
scratches and her arm made an X. But maybe that's
just coincidence. She goes, Oh, and maybe you guys have scabies.
And I'm like, what the fuck is that?
Speaker 3 (07:50):
Did I get on this couch?
Speaker 1 (07:52):
I'm like, I can promise you right now you do
not remember I had it years ago.
Speaker 3 (07:57):
It's scaby. It's the worst thing I've ever been through
in my entire life. Okay, well under your skin.
Speaker 1 (08:04):
I know you don't remember. I stayed home for like months.
Speaker 3 (08:07):
What is it? Because the name of it sounds.
Speaker 1 (08:09):
It's terrible, And I can promise you you wouldn't be
able to sleep.
Speaker 3 (08:14):
No, I can't. I have to take sleeping pills because
the itching. Do you would see marks? Though you would
have ration stuff? I do have that. Ex Do I
have this?
Speaker 2 (08:22):
Or is this just a human response to scratching yourself?
Because I swear the well, then what is the itching?
Speaker 1 (08:29):
I mean it was, and again we weren't one hundred
percent that that's what I had, but I mean it
was the most miserable I've ever been. And I mean,
you itch your entire but it's awful unless it's just
getting what.
Speaker 3 (08:40):
You should.
Speaker 1 (08:42):
Want to look up look it up and there's like
these lines that will show up on your skin.
Speaker 3 (08:49):
Have you never admitted that?
Speaker 2 (08:51):
But it was terrible, But like why would it randomly?
Thank you for sharing that with us and being so authentic.
Speaker 3 (08:55):
Well, I mean I still don't know.
Speaker 1 (08:56):
I mean I had traveled a lot, but like nice hotels,
like nothing grow not you know, whatever.
Speaker 3 (09:01):
What do you get? Is it like a contact thing?
Speaker 1 (09:03):
It's like, yeah, yeah, it would have had to have
been from like infected like sheets somewhere or something. But
I mean I hadn't stayed anywhere or not grown you know,
I hadn't who knows how, But it's it's like the
most embarrassing. I was in the middle of summer. I'd
go to soft baseball games and I'd wear full long sleeves.
Speaker 2 (09:20):
Last it was months for me. Is it perpetuated by
something like? That's why I was like, have you eaten gluten?
Maybe it's your body's reaction to gluten.
Speaker 3 (09:28):
It just wouldn't randomly happen, I feel like.
Speaker 1 (09:31):
But also side note to this, I'm literally dealing with
the same thing with immy. This is so interesting chicking
at her head seeing if there's there's no dandriff, there's
no like she can't stop.
Speaker 3 (09:43):
Oh my god, I've got lasting I've been using.
Speaker 1 (09:48):
Like she'll be out there at tumbling and she can't stop.
I'm like, you look like a dog, like sketching yourself.
Speaker 3 (09:54):
We looked.
Speaker 1 (09:54):
I looked for lice, like I literally she was like,
will you just take me to a lice place and
make sure, Like that's how much she's it.
Speaker 3 (10:00):
We have to figure this out on her.
Speaker 1 (10:03):
But I told her whatever shampoo she's been using, to
just eliminate it, Like we're just gonna eliminate things.
Speaker 2 (10:09):
So I want saying, but like not working, like literally not.
I'm like I don't so like if you figured it out,
let me know.
Speaker 3 (10:15):
I mean, that's crazy.
Speaker 2 (10:16):
I get very doctor house about stuff like that. Still
doesn't help. Like so it's like it's something in mine
still there is you're still.
Speaker 3 (10:22):
And it's dry weather, So what does that mean?
Speaker 2 (10:25):
I have something that my body is fighting that's causing
the reaction. So something is in.
Speaker 1 (10:30):
Having a reaction to stuff is like that's what alopecia is.
It's like you're it attacks the hair follicles in your
you know, your hair falls out or whatever and that's
an autoimmune so it's all very similar, but we're.
Speaker 2 (10:40):
Both post part does that matter yours isn't really like
m I'd like to do it, okay, but I just
wonder if it's something to do with like our bodies
getting back in balance.
Speaker 3 (10:53):
I don't know, but why that because my head.
Speaker 1 (10:56):
I know that's if we could all if someone could
let us know who I.
Speaker 2 (11:00):
Yeah, because it's driving me mad and I'm like, I
just I can't do it. But the funny thing was,
is I just, you know, just dealing with some things.
And so I haven't called back Kristen. And then I said, hey,
can you can you call? Can you call me? Call
me back? And you run the phone right. So Monday
I text her. I get nothing back. Fine, totally fine,
(11:23):
she's in postpartum. I give grace on grace and grace right.
I'm not that girl. Yesterday a facetimer because I'm like,
I just want to see you, like a little visual
check in. I like to get like a temperature read
you know, no answer, huh. So then I send her
the song I just called to say I love you,
because I thought maybe she just needs to know that
that's okay.
Speaker 3 (11:42):
Wherever she is no answer nothing.
Speaker 2 (11:45):
And then today quick call thought it was a butt
dial though, like I missed it, but that was weird.
I was working by my phone. Then I get a hey,
can you call me? I call her, go straight to voicemail.
I'm like, okay, alrighty, what are we dealing with? And
then and then I said to sweet Christine, who's at
my house, I said it's weird, and she goes, well,
(12:05):
are you worried? And I said no, not really, because
the thing with Jana is it could be, hey, can
you call me? I have a scab on my toe,
or you're fired from mind down, like it could be
any of the things. And I just think there's not
anything we can't handle.
Speaker 3 (12:15):
So that I call her. She's if you could.
Speaker 2 (12:16):
I was like, I was like, yeah, I got talk
to something, but I might also have scabies, and she's like,
oh my god, this is home.
Speaker 3 (12:21):
I was like, right on this, right on target.
Speaker 2 (12:23):
Yeah. Anyways, okay, we've we've kept it very light. Our
next guest is in the waiting room, and in this one,
it's so hard because I don't know what to say.
She obviously lost her husband twitch to suicide over a
year ago, and I knew her from It's Alison Holker
Boss from Dancing with the Stars, and I knew knew
(12:43):
I was on her season when she was on there,
and it's just like, what do you even say?
Speaker 3 (12:47):
And so I had to be.
Speaker 2 (12:49):
Really like, I'll be honest, probably will cry during this episode.
But I had to be like really prayerful yeah about
all of this, because I, you know, like I've shared
with you, had a really similar ark times in life
where like that was an option in my brain. Sure,
so I think that is what is It's just I
(13:09):
don't know. I'm just I had to be like I
was like, I don't know, I just was really prayerful. Well,
let's take a break get around. But first I have
to ask Hannah Jackie Easton, did you guys do the
X and do you have an X on your arm?
Speaker 4 (13:20):
I did? I knew you guys. I knew you guys
are doing it.
Speaker 3 (13:23):
Like I'm like, there's no screens off vaccine? Do you guys?
Speaker 2 (13:27):
Does it?
Speaker 3 (13:28):
Is it still there? No mind thought the one you
did isn't really super there. Yeah, You're just the whole.
Speaker 1 (13:34):
Time though you guys are talking about it.
Speaker 3 (13:36):
I was crashing my head.
Speaker 2 (13:38):
Well, I know now I feel like I have an
itchy sculptor from association.
Speaker 3 (13:41):
All right, anyways, let's take a break and they'll get
alicon on.
Speaker 4 (13:57):
I love how are you?
Speaker 3 (13:59):
I love you?
Speaker 2 (14:00):
I love your energy always, and I just remember when
I did Dance with the Stars and you were obviously
the pro that season with babyface, right, yes, And I
just remember like you were just so like your energy
was amazing. You were so sweet, so welcoming, and like
I just really I've always like appreciated that and like
you're just a beautiful soul. So thank you for always
(14:22):
being that and sharing that with other people too.
Speaker 4 (14:28):
Thank you. I appreciate that you're so kind. I remember
we had so much fun that season. It was really wonderful.
Everyone was great. It felt like a little family was awesome.
So I'm happy to be here.
Speaker 3 (14:38):
Yeah, you're sweet. Do I start?
Speaker 4 (14:41):
Well?
Speaker 3 (14:41):
I love you.
Speaker 2 (14:42):
It's just aggressive to say, how loud. But it's funny
because I don't scroll anymore on Instagram. I kind of
made a promise to myself, but if I ever see you,
I always click because you're fun, your outfits are fun
and you're always moving. So I'm not a dancer, but
I married a dancer. Ish Pasa is not a dancer,
he used. I don't know how much he would want
(15:04):
me to share publicly. He's not like a dancer, like
cool like choreographers. Wait you know, but again he's are
you serious? Yeah, he's getting a text later. It's like
backstreet boys, like he will pull out some moves, so
we will always We always have watched you and your
late husband because he was like, look at these two together,
something I could never do.
Speaker 3 (15:22):
I can't five six seven eight to save my life.
Speaker 2 (15:24):
So I would always be like, well, then we can
just watch them because they're amazing and beautiful.
Speaker 3 (15:28):
But I've always enjoyed thoroughly.
Speaker 2 (15:32):
Just your presence, like how much fun, how much life
and light you guys have shared with your world. And
we dance party at our house to mostly to shake
up my own sads. I've struggled with bouts of depression
a lot, actually, but we dance to get that out.
But it's not nearly as choreographed and cute as you.
But we do dance in our kitchen. It's a little
(15:53):
less hot. But I've just always really appreciated your presence.
And I will say this and we don't have to
stay here. But I just want you to know that,
like the moment I found out about the passing of
your husband, it was an absolute gut punch, as I
know I can't even imagine obviously, but for the rest
(16:14):
of the world being on our side of things, it
was so unexpected feeling because he is such a light.
And I think that is the one thing that I
wish people knew more about, was that that is always
there too for people that struggle with anything that is dark,
that we can dance it out and we can move
(16:35):
and through those things. But like you, guys are so
loved and you will stay so loved, And I'm just
so thankful that you got to share your world with us.
From my seat in the world.
Speaker 4 (16:46):
Thank you. That's really sweet. I appreciate everything you just said,
and you know it's I wish and I hope that
we can bring more awareness to mental health and make
people feel more comfortable when they need to ask for
help and when they need to talk something out, and
making them feel seen and heard, where you're not going
(17:10):
to be looked at different if you ask for help,
and I think that's a big thing and a big stigma,
specifically for men. Really that no one's going to look
down on you just because you might need a little
bit of an extra hug or a talk, or need
to go somewhere, need to find somewhere, whatever it is
that you're struggling with. I just hope that we can
change that stigma and really bring awareness that having a
(17:32):
talk with someone does not make you and make you
look small or feel small to someone else.
Speaker 2 (17:38):
I think we as a society need to be more
mindful the way we parent boys in general, just because
I you know, like I don't know and parenting just
the intention with parenting period. But I do agree with
everything you're saying. There's a certain pressure or stigma put
on them as a gender that doesn't feel fair too,
and like you have to be big and brave in
all the things. In reality, you're still just the person
(18:00):
and God made you and loves you well. And I'll
say too, Allison again, we're gonna we're going to go
to the other side of this. But you know, I
think one of the things that made me like, I
like started crying the first time, like I saw you
dance again and I was like, wow, like what a
beautiful like she's she's she's dancing and she's moving through
(18:22):
grief like that, and I think that gives so much
to other people that are going through the same thing.
And you're helping more people than you know. And and
with this book you have coming out keep dancing through
a boss family groove like you know, it's it's out now,
people can get it. It's by you and and twitch,
So when did you guys write it? What's the message
(18:45):
through it? Because I just love all our listeners to
know about it, to get the words spread it and
and yeah, like when did you guys write it? And
when you know? Is this when it was supposed to
be released or did you hold it? Like what was
kind of the whole thing?
Speaker 4 (19:00):
Okay, So we wrote this book back in twenty twenty one,
and we wrote it because I've always had a dream
of writing a children's book ever since I had my
first daughter, Wesley, who's now fifteen. So this has been
something I've been putting into the ecosystem and manifesting for
fifteen years. And you know, work gets away from you,
life gets away from you. And when we had Zia,
(19:25):
my youngest daughter, who's now four, when we had her,
I was what a brilliant time to not just you know,
share our family on social media and continue to these
TV shows, but really share our family's story and paper,
you know, in book form, and we wanted to share
(19:46):
a day in the life of our family. And I
think it's something that's really special that the God and
universe really worked with us in our favor, because it's
a testament to who we were and who we will
still be as a family. Because truly, honestly, this book,
it just takes you through a day of our lives.
(20:07):
And I've always been a really big manifestor I believe
in affirmations, and I do all these things every single morning.
And I've been teaching my children this for years. And
so what the book is is the following the day
in the life of each of my kids going through
a struggle, and the words that we use to get
them out of those struggles, and the things we've been
teaching them for them to be able to lean on
(20:27):
each other. And why I tell you all those things
is because after everything happened to me a year ago,
there was a lot of discussions if we even wanted
to launch the book. You know, for me, there was
moments of maybe I want to hold this book selfishly,
just for me and the kids, and not let anyone
(20:49):
else have it, and let it be a book that
my kids can read and look back on these beautiful
times and this beautiful memory that we share. Anyways, I
didn't know if I wanted to hold onto it to
just be something for us. And then I read the
book again, and I looked at the messaging and I
(21:09):
reread the title. All of these things were done. The
book was written, the illustrations were done, the title was done.
And I told Disney, I was like, this is all
I can do is keep dancing through. And this is
what I'm going to tell my children, and this is
what Steven would want me to do, and this is
what I need to do. And if I'm going to
say anything to anybody that's been following my family's journey
(21:32):
and supporting my family, and you know, people have been
following my journey since I was eighteen, of following his
journey since he was like you know, however, you know
twenty twenty two when he first doing his shows, and
they've watched us grow, and they've watched us become a family,
and they've supported us and they loved us. And if
I was going to say anything to anyone, I would
tell them to keep dancing through. And so the reason
(21:53):
I carried forward to bring this book and actually put
it back out there in the world for one else
to be able to share is because I wanted to
give back and share that we can keep dancing through.
And that's what I would want, and that's what I
want to I'm going to do, is what I'm going
to teach my children to do, and I hope to
let other people know that it's okay to keep dancing through.
(22:15):
So it's something that's really really special to my kids
and something special to me. And I really know that
Stephen would want this and in honor of him as well.
Speaker 2 (22:25):
Yeah, I love that message too, especially for people that
are dealing with grief too, because you know, even our
friend Kelly who lost her husband, she's like, what's the timeline?
When can I like be like, it's actually I don't
want to like look like I'm too HAPPI or like
can I you know, it's just because I'm still grieving
and I'll always be grieving. She's like, but no matter what,
like you just you you dance through it, you get
(22:46):
through it, and you're showing people that, like you can
still be both and you can carry both and you
can do it gracefully, and and yeah, that's that's it's
it's I can't imagine it, but I love that the
message that you're putting out there, because I think people
would maybe feel bad for dancing or being happy, you know,
(23:08):
or trying or you know what I mean, Like that's.
Speaker 1 (23:09):
Showing to the world that they're happy. Like I remember
Kelly talking about that. Yeah, you know, people have an
idea of what the timeline should be, right, but I'm
showing something other than that.
Speaker 3 (23:19):
Am I not, you know, doing it right or you
know whatever?
Speaker 2 (23:35):
I do think you I wanted to pull it up
so that I wasn't miss speaking because I don't have
my copy with me.
Speaker 3 (23:41):
But I think what was super special.
Speaker 2 (23:46):
I live for kids books, like I love kids books,
and I think it's so special to be able to
share your family with my kids, like it's just neat,
you know, So thank you first of all for taking
like the leap and going.
Speaker 3 (23:59):
I do want to share.
Speaker 2 (23:59):
This because it is so cool to be a mom
and be able to like read different life paths with kids.
You know, what I thought was really neat about it
that I don't feel like you're not going to probably
toot your own horn. But there's this like really sweet,
rhythmic piece of it that is not a normal family
(24:20):
that I would say is pretty exclusive to like your household.
From what we have seen of you is just as
like you know, followers. But there's something like like beboppy
about the way it's written that I think is really
special and like pretty unique to your family.
Speaker 3 (24:36):
And I think that is pretty cool. So tell me, does.
Speaker 2 (24:38):
That feel like a little bit of the like curtain
pulled back to expose that piece of your family? Because
to me, that's who you guys are. But I've never
seen that really in a kid's book, I don't think ever.
Speaker 4 (24:50):
For me, that was I'm so happy that you caught
that because that actually is something that we've been hoping for.
Music is such a huge part of our family and
how we live our lives and move through lives. We
always have music playing and it kind of guides us
and the emotions and the toll and the energy that
my house has. And so we really wanted to have
(25:11):
this rhythmical vibe to the book without it being about music,
you know, But really having this tone that kind of
follows a rhythm that it almost feels like while you're
reading it, you're kind of moving back and forth with it,
which is why it's you know, I'm strong, I'm smart
and kind got beats around me too, you know, take
some deep breaths in and out and all keep dancing
through it. Kind of we wanted it to feel like
(25:33):
it had this like motion to it in the words,
and so I'm glad that you call onto that, but
it is it's such an important thing for us and
my kids. I mean, listen my kids their vocabulary when
it comes to music. As Chef's kiss, it's beautiful, but
it is true. So thank you for catching that. And
we've hoped that people would feel that when they read
(25:54):
the book.
Speaker 3 (25:55):
Well, it's exciting.
Speaker 2 (25:56):
I have a little I'm raising a little beatboxer, So
that part to him is what's so cool? Is that
like beat boxy, like you know, the zip zip zip zip,
like whatever the toothbrushing piece of it is or whatever.
Like everything to him is a song. So I think
that's just pretty neat and it's just kind of fun.
It's like crazy to me to connect on pages the
(26:16):
music piece of that. We're a music family, so we
try to keep music around. But I also just love
silence a lot, So I feel like I'm not as
jam out.
Speaker 3 (26:23):
As I should be, but it is.
Speaker 2 (26:25):
I just feel like it's really a way, it's a
very unique way to connect musically from something you're just
reading and it's not a sing song y, you know,
Like it's just a really unique way to do that.
And I just truly appreciate the sharing of that.
Speaker 4 (26:40):
Thank you, thank you. Yeah, you know. For me with
the book, it's the rhythm. But like the biggest message
I hope that people realize and take away from the
book is really the affirmations in it though, you know,
my children every single morning, my kids, it's really like
it's my favorite moment with my kids every morning. They
are by saying I'm strong, I'm smart, I'm own kind,
(27:02):
Maddox is handsome, And it's just kind of a way
for us to connect. And I think it's good to
instill in children confidence, encourage and talking kindly to themselves,
because you talk to yourself more than anybody else's right,
Like we have such inner dialogue with ourselves, you know.
(27:24):
All the time. I'm trying to teach my children that
you have to speak kindly to yourself because you can't
rely on happiness from someone else. You can't rely on
this from someone else. You have to do it for yourself.
So I'm just trying to encourage you know, being nice
and speaking highly of yourself and encouraging yourself and lifting
your spirits yourself and being your your own advocate in life.
Speaker 2 (27:46):
You know, yeah, because the world's going to beat you
down and tell you that you're not and you have
to be strong enough to know, okay, you know all
the things that we're affirming and having our kids affirm
to themselves that they're like, no, actually, I don't care
that you don't like me and you're being and like,
I know, I'm uwesome because since seven years old, my
mom's were saying I'm enough, I'm brave, because like Jolie
has in her room too, she's like, I'm brave, I'm beautiful,
(28:07):
I'm strong, I'm kind She's like, and I am Jolie Ray.
And there's a few more things like I'm enough and
m every day I'm like there you go, baby, like
say say it all you know so And because I don't,
I don't think I got that as a kid, I
was gonna ask so yeah. So I'm like to me,
I'm like, I need her to know because it's like
she's I don't know. This is probably awful to say,
like and probably a therapist be like, that's really bad.
(28:28):
But sometimes I look at her like, what, what did
my little child? Like? She's like my almost little child,
like that one that was hurt inside me. So I'm like,
I gotta love her and protect her and like, you know,
make sure I choose my words carefully, like what would
I want as my little girl that was injured or
that was wounded?
Speaker 1 (28:43):
Right, you know, want to hear I think we all
have to do that because she didn't get Yeah.
Speaker 2 (28:48):
Does that is it feel like something you're passing down
because you had that, or is it feel like something
you wish you had more of? And so you're determined
to kind of like change the narrative of your family
history from here forward.
Speaker 4 (29:01):
The first time I ever really started playing with affirmations,
I was twenty years old. It is something that I
now have been doing for so long in my life,
and I attest to the way I live my life
through this. I do it every single morning. Every single morning,
I start my day by getting ready, do my hair
and makeup, and I'm talking to myself and I probably
(29:23):
sound like a crazy hum but I'm going through all
my affirmations and I'm doing it and it's meant so
much to me, and it's changed my life and it's
helped me through so many hard times in my life.
So for me, I wanted to teach it to my
kids at an earlier age so they, you know, can
(29:43):
get through the hardest times of their life through it
and with it as well. But I've been doing it
for a really, really long time, and I have such
a plethora and different arrangement of types of affirmations and
manifestations that I say and do. The newest one with
my kids that I do, though, which is, oh, it's
my favorite, is I say we do the and they
(30:03):
finish it out by saying the hard things. And I
do that one because I cold plunge every morning and
it's quite literally one of the hardest things I do.
Speaker 2 (30:15):
That's a miserable pandas and I'm like, nope, no, no.
I think as we were raised in Michigan, we feel
like we filled our quota, so we.
Speaker 3 (30:21):
Don't have to do those things anymore. Yeah, we're like, no,
actually not charming.
Speaker 4 (30:28):
But it's it's something that I really believe in and
I've seen the benefits of it, and it's well, I've
been having this really hard year. I think it's a
really big thing that I do it, and I'm it's
been really helpful for my children as well.
Speaker 2 (30:45):
That's one thing I really want to do. And I
am not like you just started doing this kind of
an assignment.
Speaker 3 (30:52):
Oh yeah from Alan? Oh yeah, yeah, and this is silly.
I'm forty two years old.
Speaker 2 (31:00):
I cannot I want to be able to be I
want to be able to stand in front of a
mirror and say those things.
Speaker 3 (31:07):
I'm not a challenge you for a week to do it.
I'm going to write you what you have to say.
You to read it. I all want to do it. Well, well, yeah,
but I do know.
Speaker 2 (31:14):
It changes your frequency, it changes the way you think,
the way you feel like of course, right, I just
don't know why I can't get out of my own way.
Speaker 4 (31:22):
But that's the hard part of it, you know, is
you know it's easy to say things like fleeting, but
you've got to look yourself in the mirror, like that
is the biggest part of it that you have to
do that I sometimes think that people miss is you
have to be like staring at yourself and seeing yourself
and saying it to yourself in that way. And it's
just a game changer, is because it you're seeing yourself,
(31:45):
You're looking at yourself, you know. And I always say
too that. I think it's also the discipline of doing it.
And I know that sounds wild and like, well, you know,
you're just talking and blah blah blah. But I've done
it every single morning I was twenty and I'm now
thirty five, and I do not I do not let
it get away from me. It's I do it every
(32:05):
single morning. So it's like the discipline and the habit
of it and the act of it that's really gone
me through.
Speaker 2 (32:12):
Love that well, Allison, thank you for coming on. Everyone
get keep dancing through a Boss Family Groove by Allison
Boss and Twitch. So thank you so much, appreciate you
coming on.
Speaker 4 (32:22):
Thank you guys, Thank you, glad to be okay, Bye
you guys.
Speaker 3 (32:26):
Bye.
Speaker 2 (32:28):
If I was here, I would start my mornings with
like a boss. Like a boss, go get them girl,
like a oos. Guys, that was a good episode. I'm
gonna just scratch away.
Speaker 3 (32:40):
Scratch that we come up with an answer. Scratch that.
Oh that's another one has the answer for us.
Speaker 2 (32:45):
So I wanted to do this on Instagram, but I
didn't want we kind to get a sponsorship somewhere. What
this is like a very head and shoulders moment, but
it's not know but do you okay? So weather has
to be a because it's a friend.
Speaker 3 (33:01):
I'm not dry. I'm not dry. I'm not I mean,
i'm dry, but my head's not like I don't know, girl,
it's weird, but apparently it's not common. And please, if
you have like lines, show up, let me know. I'll
look at it and see. Oh my god, I can't. Okay,
we got all. We're gonna stop.
Speaker 2 (33:21):
Okay, have a great night or day
Popular Podcasts
1. The Podium
The Podium: An NBC Olympic and Paralympic podcast. Join us for insider coverage during the intense competition at the 2024 Paris Olympic and Paralympic Games. In the run-up to the Opening Ceremony, we’ll bring you deep into the stories and events that have you know and those you'll be hard-pressed to forget.
2. In The Village
In The Village will take you into the most exclusive areas of the 2024 Paris Olympic Games to explore the daily life of athletes, complete with all the funny, mundane and unexpected things you learn off the field of play. Join Elizabeth Beisel as she sits down with Olympians each day in Paris.
3. iHeartOlympics: The Latest
Listen to the latest news from the 2024 Olympics.