November 7, 2018 • 15 mins
Dear Steve and Shirley, I have a dilemma and I need your advice. I’m in my late 20s and I work for a non-profit organization and my boss is a fine older gentleman. From the beginning, I could tell he was attracted to me and I would catch him looking at me. One Saturday about three months ago, he called and invited me over to watch a pre-season game with him and some friends. I already had plans, so I told him I would come by later. When I got to his house, he was the only one there........
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
All right. Coming up in forty one after the hour,
it will be our girl from the Talk, the one
and only Cheryl Underwood. She's gonna be here. We'll love
to hear her. Take m Yes, Steve, But right now
it is time for my Strawberry Letter for today. If
you need advice on relationships, on dating, on work, on sex,
(00:23):
on parenting, and more, please submit your Strawberry letter to
Steve Harvey f M and click submit Strawberry letter. Tell
them Steve Harvey, please shure I want you to quit
include me. Why just let me do my answer to that?
Don't ask me if you don't want me, and Shirley
say nothing to you. You don't send this your letter.
(00:43):
We could be reading your letter live, just like we're
gonna read this one. Right Hey, let us Sexy number
two jump in here right behind the in yourself. But hey,
buckle up and hold on tight. We got buck along
it all long time. We gotta find you. Stopberry letter subject.
My boss controls me. Here's Stephen, Shirley. I have a
(01:04):
dilemma and I need your advice. I'm in my late
twenties and I work for a nonprofit organization and my
boss is a fine, older gentleman. From the beginning, I
could tell he was attracted to me, and I would
catch him looking at me. One Saturday, about three months ago,
he called and invited me over to watch a pre
(01:25):
game season show with him and his friends. I already
had I know, I know, watch a preseason game, dyslexics
season show, pre games, preseason game, anything about sports. Here
(01:46):
we go the voice on the show and losing it.
Uh with the preseason game. Okay, preseason game. He wanted
her to watch that with him and some friends. Uh.
She already had plans, so she told him she would
come by later, and when she got to his house,
he was the only one there. After watching a few
(02:09):
quarters of the game, he pulled me closer to him
on the couch and got all touchy feely. So yes,
we end up having sex. Afterwards. I went home and
he called me later that night and said he picked
me up for work so we could talk. It's been
three months and I have spent every night with him
at his house. My boss is sixteen years older than me,
(02:32):
but we worked well together and he has helped me
with my finances and taught me how to run a
small business. He has told me that he is not
in a relationship, but admitted that he had a few
female friends that he entertained. I cooked for him daily,
I cleaned up his house, and I run small errands
for him. There have been a few nights that he
has left the house after dinner and didn't come back
(02:54):
until the next morning. I am in no position to
say anything, so I let him have his cake and
eat it too. At first it didn't bother me, but
now it's starting to. When I asked him what's going on,
he said that he has helped me get my life together,
and I have no room to complain, so he can
(03:14):
do whatever he wants to do. I'm not sure why
he keeps me around. I do need my job, so
I don't want to keep pressuring him with questions. How
should I handle this situation? Well, I say this, Uh,
you're in no position not to say anything at this point.
This is your life. You have to take control of
your own life and not let this old man do
(03:37):
it that you're dating. Uh. You're in your twenties, okay,
and you work for this man, but it doesn't mean
that you have to give away your self respect here.
You're not defeated. Uh, look at what this fine older
gentleman as you call him, taught you. He empowered you. Actually,
when you think about it, now you can better handle
your finances as a result of being with him, and
(03:58):
now you know how to run a business. That's empowering.
So don't let him hold you hostage in this particular
job you're in now, or or don't let him hold
you hostage in this relationship. This is so disrespectful. By
the way, I gotta ask you, are you his maid
or are you his girlfriend? You're over there cooking, cleaning, running,
(04:18):
errand sex in him and as you say, letting him
have his cake and eat it too. I think you're
doing too much and it's just time you start looking
for your own job. Time you start building your business
that he taught you to do. Okay, put yourself first.
Break up with this man who tells you, I mean
really the nerve after spending the night out all night
that he can do whatever he wants to do. Well,
(04:40):
guess what, so can you. You can do whatever you
want to do to You just gotta leave him, and
you just gotta do it. Steve, take your time, and
it was a pregame show. By the way, Now, this
(05:01):
girl is in her late twenties. She worked for a
nonprofit organization and her boss is a fine older general,
you know, and he'd been looking at us, so she
could tell he was attracted. One Saturday, asked him come
over and watch a game with some friends. You have
some plans. You told him you come by later. When
you got to the house, you was the only one. Now,
(05:24):
was nobody ever over there at the time. Nobody goes
over somebody house to watch a preseason game in one quarter, though, dog,
nobody go to nobody house to watch preseason football. Now
now can we don't even know who to help play,
(05:44):
and it don't count. That's not the time to spend
money on tila. So you get over there and y'all
watching it, And then time everybody he started pulling, pulling
you closer to him on the couch, and he got
all touchy feeling. And then right after y'all got touchy feeling.
(06:05):
We ended up having six oh the day. Yes, lord,
what did you just say? I'm sorry? I followed it.
Are we lying? We are? Yeah? So right after that
(06:27):
they got touchy feeling that bam, just like that. Now
they're having sex, you went home. He called you that night,
said he picked you up for work so we could talk.
It's been three months. You just spent every night with
him at his house. My boss is sixteen years old.
And let me do the math, right, you late twenties,
(06:48):
Let's say you gonna say he's sixteen forty five, sixteen
years Yeah, but he's been in that old. Then he
got to work well all together, got your finances, taught
you how to run a business, told me he's not
in relationship, but admitted he got a few female friends
(07:09):
that he entertained. Now he told you this upfront. I'm
not in a relationship, but I got a few. That
means more than to women that I entertained. Hello, that
means I'm somewhere putting on the show. That's what entertained me.
(07:34):
And he knows what he's doing because all he did
was get touchy feeling, that's all. But he didn't master
the art or touchy feeling. Now touch you feeling to
lead you down the path of darkness and iniquity, and
(07:57):
iniquity that you have come to the realization, come on
here now that you won't him, got to have him,
must be with you so now you're at the house
every day, cleaning, cooking, making up bears, moving furniture. Come on,
(08:27):
spraying pledge that, and I don't know what last time
I cleaned up. We'll be right back with this hill.
We're in the middle of the strawberry letters. Steve, come on,
big dog hanging here. Let's recap and I get part
(08:50):
two of yours. Little uh, little girl in her late
twenties start working for his company, head to find old
dude and they're running it. Um. She could tell he
liked him right away because the way she was looking
at him. He invited over the house to watch football
game preseason, right, that's what I said, the game. Don't
(09:10):
nobody go see supposed to be a bunch of friends
watching games. She said she'd be over that later. She
get over there ain't nobody, but hell yeah, because don't
nobody go to nobody's house for no preseason for They
then sending up on the couch, he pulled her a
little closer. Did he get touchy feeling? Right After a
(09:34):
little touching in a little feeling, they went on half sex. Yeah,
it's been most now three months. She didn't spend every
night at his house Yeah. My boss is sixteen years
older than me, but we worked well together and he's
helped me with my finances and taught me how to
(09:54):
run a small business. She getting caught up. He has
told me that he is not in a relationship, but
admitted that he has a few female friends that he entertains.
What does it mean to entertain a woman? That means
he's somewhere putting on a show. I cooked for him daily,
(10:19):
I cleaned up his house, and I run small errands
for him. Kissy's trying to make an impression. I just
called it kissy. Really, that's the name. He came and
he ain't all this cooking, cleaning, running, just talking and running?
(10:44):
What cooking clean? I know? That's what I said. She
and she doing a lot. Now, what you want me
to call her? Was named and I flow Alice. It's
some famous maids on TV. Now, there have been a
(11:12):
few nights that he has left the house after dinner
and didn't come back until the next morning. I'm in
no position to say anything, really, Okay, Well, you've removed
yourself from any point of power, so you've said I'm
in no position to say anything. Um, well, so you
(11:33):
want right now m so I let him have his
cake and eat it too. This is an ideal relationship.
Oh absolutely. At first it didn't bother me, but now
starting to. When I asked him what's going on, he said,
he didn't help me get my life together. I have
no room to complain. You said, he has several female
(11:59):
friends that he entertained well after dinner, and he leaves
a house, he got to go entertained. And what means
that is a man so well, probably naked putting on
the show. Probably, Yeah, he got burned over the stripping
hand count of stuff, he over the entertained and he
(12:21):
do what he want to do. Then when you say
something to him about it, he said, even help you
get your life together. You ain't got no room to complain.
So he can do whatever he wants. Any man can
do whatever he wants if he's allowed to. It just
depends on what we want to do. So now you
allow it, even though you say you have no position
(12:42):
to say anything. You don't have to sit there and
take it though. That are other job. Now here she
go right here, so he can do whatever he wants.
I'm not sure why he keeps me around. No, because
you keep hanging. You ain't win nowhere? What do he
got to get rid of you for? I can sleep
with you, you cooking, cleaning my house, running ads, and
(13:04):
after we eat, I go somewhere and spend another night
with another chick. Why would I run you off him?
That's the greatest thing ever took at my clothes out cleaning,
And I'm not sure why he keeps me around? Why
would you cut loose all it free help, good stuff?
I do need my job. You ain't making that much
(13:26):
down at that damn nonprofit. I can tell you that
right now. You can. You can make that money somewhere else.
But you don't want to go he picking you up?
You over there every night. You don't find a mission
in life? You clean it. You need to up your
standards a little bit in a relationship. Let the man
walk all over you. Didn't want to know why he
(13:47):
keep you around? Keep you around? Because why with the question?
And why you still around when you're gonna cut the yard?
Sitting up in here all they say, you're still. I
gotta get all over here. I got I won't want
I want to dinner because I got to get after
I eat, I got to get out here and get
in the table. Listen, sitting up in here hard as
(14:10):
I'm out here working down here, just nonprofit all day?
Are you only showing yes? Stop it here? And he's
nothing fun anyway? Man talking about I don't know why
(14:32):
he keeps me around and why would you get rid
of you? The best thing ever, beautiful situation for him,
I don't understand where for me, I do need my job,
so I don't want to keep pressuring him with questions
how should I handle this? First of all, you need
(14:55):
to remove yourself from the situation, because this is a
no win relationship with you. You're letting a man sleep
with you while he's telling you he's openly sleeping with
other people. And if you can justify that in your
mind and you can take about anything, so you can
stay there and keep taking his crap and not feel
pressured and scared to say something, or you can leave
(15:16):
and go get another job. But I think you like
being over at his house too much because it's sixteen
years boy, he didn't done something, all right, Look, we
gotta get out of here. Email us or Instagram. That's
your thoughts on today's Strawberry Letter. It's Steve Harvey. FM
coming up in ten minutes from the Talk Our Girls,
Cheryl Underwood. You're listening to the Steve Harvey Morning Show.
All right. Coming up in forty one after the hour,
it will be our girl from the Talk, the one
and only Cheryl Underwood. She's gonna be here. We'll love
to hear her. Take m Yes, Steve, But right now
it is time for my Strawberry Letter for today. If
you need advice on relationships, on dating, on work, on sex,
(00:23):
on parenting, and more, please submit your Strawberry letter to
Steve Harvey f M and click submit Strawberry letter. Tell
them Steve Harvey, please shure I want you to quit
include me. Why just let me do my answer to that?
Don't ask me if you don't want me, and Shirley
say nothing to you. You don't send this your letter.
(00:43):
We could be reading your letter live, just like we're
gonna read this one. Right Hey, let us Sexy number
two jump in here right behind the in yourself. But hey,
buckle up and hold on tight. We got buck along
it all long time. We gotta find you. Stopberry letter subject.
My boss controls me. Here's Stephen, Shirley. I have a
(01:04):
dilemma and I need your advice. I'm in my late
twenties and I work for a nonprofit organization and my
boss is a fine, older gentleman. From the beginning, I
could tell he was attracted to me, and I would
catch him looking at me. One Saturday, about three months ago,
he called and invited me over to watch a pre
(01:25):
game season show with him and his friends. I already
had I know, I know, watch a preseason game, dyslexics
season show, pre games, preseason game, anything about sports. Here
(01:46):
we go the voice on the show and losing it.
Uh with the preseason game. Okay, preseason game. He wanted
her to watch that with him and some friends. Uh.
She already had plans, so she told him she would
come by later, and when she got to his house,
he was the only one there. After watching a few
(02:09):
quarters of the game, he pulled me closer to him
on the couch and got all touchy feely. So yes,
we end up having sex. Afterwards. I went home and
he called me later that night and said he picked
me up for work so we could talk. It's been
three months and I have spent every night with him
at his house. My boss is sixteen years older than me,
(02:32):
but we worked well together and he has helped me
with my finances and taught me how to run a
small business. He has told me that he is not
in a relationship, but admitted that he had a few
female friends that he entertained. I cooked for him daily,
I cleaned up his house, and I run small errands
for him. There have been a few nights that he
has left the house after dinner and didn't come back
(02:54):
until the next morning. I am in no position to
say anything, so I let him have his cake and
eat it too. At first it didn't bother me, but
now it's starting to. When I asked him what's going on,
he said that he has helped me get my life together,
and I have no room to complain, so he can
(03:14):
do whatever he wants to do. I'm not sure why
he keeps me around. I do need my job, so
I don't want to keep pressuring him with questions. How
should I handle this situation? Well, I say this, Uh,
you're in no position not to say anything at this point.
This is your life. You have to take control of
your own life and not let this old man do
(03:37):
it that you're dating. Uh. You're in your twenties, okay,
and you work for this man, but it doesn't mean
that you have to give away your self respect here.
You're not defeated. Uh, look at what this fine older
gentleman as you call him, taught you. He empowered you. Actually,
when you think about it, now you can better handle
your finances as a result of being with him, and
(03:58):
now you know how to run a business. That's empowering.
So don't let him hold you hostage in this particular
job you're in now, or or don't let him hold
you hostage in this relationship. This is so disrespectful. By
the way, I gotta ask you, are you his maid
or are you his girlfriend? You're over there cooking, cleaning, running,
(04:18):
errand sex in him and as you say, letting him
have his cake and eat it too. I think you're
doing too much and it's just time you start looking
for your own job. Time you start building your business
that he taught you to do. Okay, put yourself first.
Break up with this man who tells you, I mean
really the nerve after spending the night out all night
that he can do whatever he wants to do. Well,
(04:40):
guess what, so can you. You can do whatever you
want to do to You just gotta leave him, and
you just gotta do it. Steve, take your time, and
it was a pregame show. By the way, Now, this
(05:01):
girl is in her late twenties. She worked for a
nonprofit organization and her boss is a fine older general,
you know, and he'd been looking at us, so she
could tell he was attracted. One Saturday, asked him come
over and watch a game with some friends. You have
some plans. You told him you come by later. When
you got to the house, you was the only one. Now,
(05:24):
was nobody ever over there at the time. Nobody goes
over somebody house to watch a preseason game in one quarter, though, dog,
nobody go to nobody house to watch preseason football. Now
now can we don't even know who to help play,
(05:44):
and it don't count. That's not the time to spend
money on tila. So you get over there and y'all
watching it, And then time everybody he started pulling, pulling
you closer to him on the couch, and he got
all touchy feeling. And then right after y'all got touchy feeling.
(06:05):
We ended up having six oh the day. Yes, lord,
what did you just say? I'm sorry? I followed it.
Are we lying? We are? Yeah? So right after that
(06:27):
they got touchy feeling that bam, just like that. Now
they're having sex, you went home. He called you that night,
said he picked you up for work so we could talk.
It's been three months. You just spent every night with
him at his house. My boss is sixteen years old.
And let me do the math, right, you late twenties,
(06:48):
Let's say you gonna say he's sixteen forty five, sixteen
years Yeah, but he's been in that old. Then he
got to work well all together, got your finances, taught
you how to run a business, told me he's not
in relationship, but admitted he got a few female friends
(07:09):
that he entertained. Now he told you this upfront. I'm
not in a relationship, but I got a few. That
means more than to women that I entertained. Hello, that
means I'm somewhere putting on the show. That's what entertained me.
(07:34):
And he knows what he's doing because all he did
was get touchy feeling, that's all. But he didn't master
the art or touchy feeling. Now touch you feeling to
lead you down the path of darkness and iniquity, and
(07:57):
iniquity that you have come to the realization, come on
here now that you won't him, got to have him,
must be with you so now you're at the house
every day, cleaning, cooking, making up bears, moving furniture. Come on,
(08:27):
spraying pledge that, and I don't know what last time
I cleaned up. We'll be right back with this hill.
We're in the middle of the strawberry letters. Steve, come on,
big dog hanging here. Let's recap and I get part
(08:50):
two of yours. Little uh, little girl in her late
twenties start working for his company, head to find old
dude and they're running it. Um. She could tell he
liked him right away because the way she was looking
at him. He invited over the house to watch football
game preseason, right, that's what I said, the game. Don't
(09:10):
nobody go see supposed to be a bunch of friends
watching games. She said she'd be over that later. She
get over there ain't nobody, but hell yeah, because don't
nobody go to nobody's house for no preseason for They
then sending up on the couch, he pulled her a
little closer. Did he get touchy feeling? Right After a
(09:34):
little touching in a little feeling, they went on half sex. Yeah,
it's been most now three months. She didn't spend every
night at his house Yeah. My boss is sixteen years
older than me, but we worked well together and he's
helped me with my finances and taught me how to
(09:54):
run a small business. She getting caught up. He has
told me that he is not in a relationship, but
admitted that he has a few female friends that he entertains.
What does it mean to entertain a woman? That means
he's somewhere putting on a show. I cooked for him daily,
(10:19):
I cleaned up his house, and I run small errands
for him. Kissy's trying to make an impression. I just
called it kissy. Really, that's the name. He came and
he ain't all this cooking, cleaning, running, just talking and running?
(10:44):
What cooking clean? I know? That's what I said. She
and she doing a lot. Now, what you want me
to call her? Was named and I flow Alice. It's
some famous maids on TV. Now, there have been a
(11:12):
few nights that he has left the house after dinner
and didn't come back until the next morning. I'm in
no position to say anything, really, Okay, Well, you've removed
yourself from any point of power, so you've said I'm
in no position to say anything. Um, well, so you
(11:33):
want right now m so I let him have his
cake and eat it too. This is an ideal relationship.
Oh absolutely. At first it didn't bother me, but now
starting to. When I asked him what's going on, he said,
he didn't help me get my life together. I have
no room to complain. You said, he has several female
(11:59):
friends that he entertained well after dinner, and he leaves
a house, he got to go entertained. And what means
that is a man so well, probably naked putting on
the show. Probably, Yeah, he got burned over the stripping
hand count of stuff, he over the entertained and he
(12:21):
do what he want to do. Then when you say
something to him about it, he said, even help you
get your life together. You ain't got no room to complain.
So he can do whatever he wants. Any man can
do whatever he wants if he's allowed to. It just
depends on what we want to do. So now you
allow it, even though you say you have no position
(12:42):
to say anything. You don't have to sit there and
take it though. That are other job. Now here she
go right here, so he can do whatever he wants.
I'm not sure why he keeps me around. No, because
you keep hanging. You ain't win nowhere? What do he
got to get rid of you for? I can sleep
with you, you cooking, cleaning my house, running ads, and
(13:04):
after we eat, I go somewhere and spend another night
with another chick. Why would I run you off him?
That's the greatest thing ever took at my clothes out cleaning,
And I'm not sure why he keeps me around? Why
would you cut loose all it free help, good stuff?
I do need my job. You ain't making that much
(13:26):
down at that damn nonprofit. I can tell you that
right now. You can. You can make that money somewhere else.
But you don't want to go he picking you up?
You over there every night. You don't find a mission
in life? You clean it. You need to up your
standards a little bit in a relationship. Let the man
walk all over you. Didn't want to know why he
(13:47):
keep you around? Keep you around? Because why with the question?
And why you still around when you're gonna cut the yard?
Sitting up in here all they say, you're still. I
gotta get all over here. I got I won't want
I want to dinner because I got to get after
I eat, I got to get out here and get
in the table. Listen, sitting up in here hard as
(14:10):
I'm out here working down here, just nonprofit all day?
Are you only showing yes? Stop it here? And he's
nothing fun anyway? Man talking about I don't know why
(14:32):
he keeps me around and why would you get rid
of you? The best thing ever, beautiful situation for him,
I don't understand where for me, I do need my job,
so I don't want to keep pressuring him with questions
how should I handle this? First of all, you need
(14:55):
to remove yourself from the situation, because this is a
no win relationship with you. You're letting a man sleep
with you while he's telling you he's openly sleeping with
other people. And if you can justify that in your
mind and you can take about anything, so you can
stay there and keep taking his crap and not feel
pressured and scared to say something, or you can leave
(15:16):
and go get another job. But I think you like
being over at his house too much because it's sixteen
years boy, he didn't done something, all right, Look, we
gotta get out of here. Email us or Instagram. That's
your thoughts on today's Strawberry Letter. It's Steve Harvey. FM
coming up in ten minutes from the Talk Our Girls,
Cheryl Underwood. You're listening to the Steve Harvey Morning Show.
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