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May 22, 2023 13 mins

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Speaker 1 (00:01):
It is time now for today's Strawberry Letter, and if
you need advice on relationships, work, sex, parenting, and more,
please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEFM dot com.
All you have to do is click submit Strawberry Letter
and we could be reading your letter live on the air,
just like we're going to read this one right here,
right now.

Speaker 2 (00:18):
You never know, it could be yours, could be yours.

Speaker 3 (00:21):
Buckle up and hold on tight. We got it for
you here. It is Strawberry Letter.

Speaker 2 (00:26):
Thank you, nephew. Subject to my marriage or my pleasure.

Speaker 1 (00:29):
Dear Stephen Shirley, I've been married almost twenty years and
my husband has put me in a difficult position. When
we first got together, we were swingers for a few years.
We only did it when we were on vacation, and
it was only with the couples we traveled with. We
used to have an occasional threesome, so my husband would
be happy. He would not let me bring another man

(00:50):
into the threesome, so he let me go have sex
with an old friend of mine a few times over
the years. But lately my husband doesn't want to have
sex at all. He said he's had enough wild sexual
experiences to last a lifetime. It's not a medical thing
because his stuff is still working properly.

Speaker 2 (01:09):
It's been eight months since he's.

Speaker 1 (01:11):
Touched me, and on top of that, he changed the
rules of our marriage.

Speaker 2 (01:16):
He told me that if he suspects I'm looking up
with my guy on the side, he will leave me.

Speaker 1 (01:21):
I do not like ultimatum, so I told him that
I need to be pleasured, and since he's changed his
outlook on intimacy, I have to handle business elsewhere. Two
days ago, after work, I went to meet my side
guy for drinks. We planned to have sex after drinks,
so we started fooling around at the bar. I couldn't

(01:42):
wait to give him a nice long kiss. As we
were kissing, my husband walked up and asked me to
leave with him. I left, but I did not talk
to him all the way home. He has threatened to
divorce me, and he said he will say I cheated
on him in the paperwork.

Speaker 2 (01:59):
How can he do that when.

Speaker 1 (02:00):
We've cheated on each other and with each other all
of a sudden, he is a model husband, and he's
forgotten that he introduced me to this lifestyle.

Speaker 2 (02:10):
I need to.

Speaker 1 (02:11):
Stay married because we have too many assets together, but
I need the D two.

Speaker 2 (02:17):
What should I do here? Why?

Speaker 1 (02:20):
What? Wow? Okay, See, this is what happens when swinging
in threesomes and going outside of your marriage for sex
and all that. This is what happens when it goes bad.
One thing is true that your husband said, and that
is that he's had enough wile sex to last him
a lifetime.

Speaker 2 (02:39):
I believe that.

Speaker 1 (02:41):
I don't see how you guys made it for twenty
years doing this, But why don't you believe him? Yes,
he may have introduced you to this lifestyle, but he
says he's done with it now. People grow, people change,
people change all the time.

Speaker 2 (02:55):
He's over it. The problem is there's two of you
in this marriage.

Speaker 1 (02:59):
He introduced you to this lifestyle and now he's made
the decision without you to stop it. It's good that
he doesn't want to swing anymore, because maybe your marriage
has a chance to survive, although I really don't see
it at this point because you said you just want
to stay together because you have too many assets together.
But the fact is that he doesn't want to have

(03:22):
sex with you anymore is definitely an issue if you
guys are going to be together. I mean what are
you supposed to do with this new information? And what
are you supposed to do in a marriage with no sex?
So you continue to do what you've been doing, seeing
other guys, seeing your side guy, and that's what he
said is going to make him leave you. Now he's

(03:42):
given you an ultimatum which you said you don't like.
So it sounds like your husband is serious about all
of this. So if you don't stop having sex with
others and he doesn't start having sex with you again,
your marriage, and I use that term very loosely, your
marriage or your version of marriage is over. So those
are your options. Those are your options. It's not really

(04:04):
much of a marriage anyway.

Speaker 4 (04:06):
Steve, Well, let's comment on this raggedy letter my marriage
or my pleasure? Well, I don't know what to tell you, lady,
I really don't. You've been married for almost twenty years
and now you're saying your husband has put you in.

Speaker 3 (04:21):
A difficult situation. That's really odd to you.

Speaker 4 (04:25):
And then you start telling us how when y'all was together,
y'all was swingers for a few years. Really, we only
did it when we were on vacation, and it was
only with couples. We travel with. Why do these people
be finding each other out? Is it a web site?

Speaker 1 (04:43):
Yes?

Speaker 2 (04:44):
All of that?

Speaker 4 (04:45):
What is going Oh? Man, I ain't never what's going on?
How do you who introduces this to the other person?
How do you take this in there to your wife
and go, baby, I've been looking at this right here.

Speaker 3 (04:58):
You want to try this?

Speaker 4 (04:59):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (05:01):
I don't hear these people.

Speaker 4 (05:05):
Then she said, we used to have an occasional threesome
so my husband would be happy, and he would not
let me bring another man into the threesome. Well, I
mean I understand that personally, but you said something to
here is very telling. We used to have an occasional
threesome so my husband would be happy.

Speaker 3 (05:26):
Oh okay, oh okay.

Speaker 4 (05:30):
So now the swinging wasn't enough. Let's do a threesome
so your husband could be happy. And he found you
and you married into this. So since he wouldn't let
you bring another man, he would let you go have
sex with an old friend of yours for a few
times over the years. But lately my husband don't want

(05:53):
to have sex at all. Let me just say this.

Speaker 3 (05:56):
He tied to you. He tied to you, and he
don't love you.

Speaker 4 (06:07):
Any time you send your wife off to the arms
of another man's because you don't care nothing about him.
You just don't care about her. And that's the reality
of one of the aspects of this letter. Your husband
don't give a damn about you. I'm gonna send you

(06:29):
off to another man. I'm gonna bring another woman in here.
I'm we gonna swing. I'm gonna watch another man do
you and you watch me do another woman.

Speaker 3 (06:38):
Man, get out of here.

Speaker 2 (06:39):
Hang on, Steve, hang on.

Speaker 1 (06:41):
We'll have part two of your response coming up at
twenty three minutes after the hour today strawberry letter, subject
my marriage or my Pleasure. We'll get back into it
right after this. You're listening Steve Hard Morning Show. All right,
come on, Steve, let's recap today's strawberry letter. The subject
is my marriage or my pleasure.

Speaker 3 (07:03):
A couple bit married twenty years.

Speaker 4 (07:04):
They used to be swingers, but they only did it
on vacation with couples that they went on vacation with.
I don't know how they found each other. People do
it all the time, though. Then he said, she said,
when you used to have an occasional threesome, so my
husband would be happy, So he need all this he
to convince you to give yourself to another man while

(07:25):
y'all on vacation, so he could be with another woman
on vacation. And now he wanted some more women in
here so he could be happy. But he wouldn't let
you bring a man in the room because now it's
two dudes in him, and he wouldn't.

Speaker 3 (07:40):
Let you do that.

Speaker 4 (07:40):
But he would let you go have sex with an
old friend a few times over the years. But lately
my husband don't want to have sex at all because
he don't give a damn about you. If you with
the man that will let you let another man have you,
it's because he don't value you.

Speaker 3 (07:58):
There's no value.

Speaker 4 (07:59):
I would want somebody to marry me because they loved
me and wanted to be with me and share life
with me, not share me with other people life.

Speaker 3 (08:11):
Y'all ain't got nothing here.

Speaker 4 (08:12):
He said he had enough wild sex experiences to last
a lifetime. Is not a medical thing because this stuff
is still working properly. It's been eight months since he
touched me, and on top of that, he changed the
rules of our marriage, or it's been eight months.

Speaker 3 (08:27):
Since he tied of you.

Speaker 4 (08:29):
See, he done went along with this all these years
now he tired of it and he tied of you.
He told me that if he suspects I'm hooking up
with my guy on the side, he will leave me.
I don't like ultimatoes, so I told him I need
to be pleasured. And since he changed it out look
on intimacy, I have to handle my business elsewhere.

Speaker 3 (08:50):
Okay, why don't y'all just get divorced.

Speaker 4 (08:52):
Y'all ain't had no marriage and it be yon't even
why you call it my marriage or my pleasure. It's
just been a hookup for pleasure. Y'all just swim threesomes,
dating apps, wild parties, pass around. Y'all been passing each
other around for twenty years. Two days ago, after work,
I went to meet my side guy for drinks. We
planned to have sex after drinks, so we started fooling

(09:14):
around the bar. I couldn't wait to give him a
nice long kiss. As we was kissing, my husband walked
up and asked me to leave with him. Wait a minute,
what see it? Where's the police report at right here?
But I don't understand. I walk up my wife kissing
the man he asked me to leave with him. Well,

(09:37):
we're not finna leave him. We're not finna leave him
when we can't go no where. I gotta pay for
the damages.

Speaker 3 (09:48):
I gotta.

Speaker 4 (09:52):
You know, when they put that yellow tampa up, it
says you cannot cross it. We can't even get out
of here. I got to feel out this police report.
I'm in the backseat of the car talking. I got
to go down here to this little interview room so
they can talk to me downtown. And he asked me

(10:14):
to leave with him, but I left, but I did
not talk to him all the way home. He has
threatened to divorce me, and he said he will say
that I cheated on him on the paperwork. How can
he do that when we've cheated on each other and
with each other all of a sudden, he's a model
husband and he's forgot that he introduced me to this lifestyle.

(10:37):
I need to stay married because we have too many
assets together.

Speaker 3 (10:41):
But I need the D two. What should I do here?

Speaker 4 (10:47):
Well, this marriage is a rap because it never was
a marriage. And you're right, he introduced you to this lifestyle.
Now he want to chain you. But now you living
a life. This is your style. This is it? Do
you know in this whole letter. The word love was

(11:08):
never mentioned, not one single time. Ain't nobody in love
with nobody? You're sitting at the box, couldn't wait to
kiss this man? Your husband? Come up, he ain't even upset.
He tell you to leave with him? Hey, neither one
of y'all in love?

Speaker 3 (11:25):
Wow?

Speaker 4 (11:26):
So what you're fighting for this marriage for? Why aren't
you gonna be free so you can do whatever you want?
One of these assets is what you're talking about?

Speaker 3 (11:34):
Right? What didnt happen is see all his asses, set
all this emotion.

Speaker 2 (11:41):
Come on, break it down one more time. I like it.

Speaker 3 (11:44):
I said, all his ass and set all this in emotion.

Speaker 4 (11:49):
That's what your asset and done?

Speaker 3 (11:52):
Right?

Speaker 4 (11:55):
Y'all's asked the sect the relationship on five.

Speaker 3 (12:00):
See, so now you're.

Speaker 4 (12:02):
Talking about this, let's talk about assets for a minute.
Like I said, all this ass is set, all this
in motion, and y'all been passing out ass in sets.
This ain't even a good tennis match. Tennis was played

(12:24):
in sex with two people. Ain't never been three people
on tennis court. You gotta play doubles. So this is
a rap. I don't really, lady, I can't help you
stay in the marriage. He's not having sex with you,
but I want you to understand something. He having sex somewhere,

(12:47):
having sex for eight months.

Speaker 2 (12:49):
Let me tell you every right now, all right, all right, Steve,
thank you.

Speaker 1 (12:51):
Hit us up on Instagram at Steve Harvey Fm to
comment on today's Strawberry Letter. You can also check out
the Strawberry Letter podcast on the I Heart app.

Speaker 2 (13:00):
Okay, coming up.

Speaker 1 (13:02):
Next to the Sports Talk with Junior. Right after this,
you're listening to The Harvey Morning Show
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