May 10, 2023 • 48 mins
The Judi Diamond Connection Meet Patsy Roach founder of onlinedatingwithpatsy.com. Patsy has worked very hard for years on fleshing out and exposing online dating scammers. She's like the Dating Scammer Sleuth! NOW she's become the go to for advice on Tik Tok among her other socials. We will definitely be hearing more from Patsy as this is important information for anyone trying to find love online! Check out her website at https://www.onlinedatingwithpatsy.com/ and all her other socials: Visit my Blog: https://onlinedatingwithpatsy.com/PODCAST on Amazon Music, Apple, Deezer, iHeart Radio, Pandora, Pocket Cast, Spotify, Stitcher (Online Dating with Patsy Podcast)TIK TOK: @onlinedatingwithpatsyINSTAGRAM: patsyonlinedate
Please subscribe to channel and connect to socials! LOVE YOU AND THANK YOU! Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/judi.diamond/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/judi.diamond/ Judi Diamond on iHeartMedia: https://klou.iheart.com/featured/judi... TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@judidiamondti...
Please subscribe to channel and connect to socials! LOVE YOU AND THANK YOU! Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/judi.diamond/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/judi.diamond/ Judi Diamond on iHeartMedia: https://klou.iheart.com/featured/judi... TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@judidiamondti...
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Patsy Roach, Patsy, you havebeen reaching out to me for a long
time. I'm a pest. No, you know what I have to tell
you. Everything happens for a reason, and timing is everything. And honestly,
I've always wanted to talk to youbecause what you do is amazing.
But the biggest thing I have tosay is you're very empowering because you are
(00:25):
very very You're passionate, and youjust keep working and working and working at
it, and you're getting somewhere withit. In fact, you're getting somewhere
really big. So talk about inone or two sentences, what do you
do, and then we'll go moredeeply into it. Sure, I have
a blog that I've had for sixyears, and then I've been podcasting for
(00:46):
two years, and it's all mystories and actual screenshots and recorded conversations with
online romance scammers. And it's notjust dating sites, it's all social media
right now, most of mine comefrom instagramm interesting. Yeah, So I
try to show women and men thereare men who do get scammed, how
(01:08):
not to fall for them, andI give them all the tips. And
if you listen to my auto recordaudio recordings, you will hear me interact
with them. I play a charactera lot of times. I go by
the name of Susanne, which isSusanne sugar Baker from Designing Women. Huge
fan of that show, and soI go by Susanne, so I don't
(01:29):
go by Patsy at all. Andthen the picture I have on my profile
is an older one from probably howmany years ago. It was a little
thinner and I had sharp brown hair. I started the pink in twenty twenty,
So I mean it's my actual picturesthat I do use. I just
don't use my name. So let'sstart from the very beginning. Let's start
(01:51):
at the very Sorry I'm staying thesame thing. That funny. So I
want to know when did you whatwas that made you want to do this?
Obviously something happened to you. Wasit the first time out? Yeah?
Well, first off, I neversent anybody money. I'm very suspicious
of people. No, it wasin twenty sixteen. I was sitting in
(02:15):
church and on the back of thechurch bullet and I'm Catholic and they had
an ad for Catholic match dot com. Now not looking for anybody, still
not looking for anybody, But itwas curiosity Now, nothing happened there,
but I was telling a coworker aboutit and they're like, oh, you
should trymatch dot com and I'm like, oh, okay. So I set
up an account with match dot comand right away I got an email from
(02:38):
a guy who said he was inthe army on a peacekeeping mission named that
country is always my response, Andit was just all the sweet talk and
how beautiful you are, and Imean, I know I am, but
you are. It's you know,but it's like it was just a lot
of sweet talk and they're looking for, you know, someone to spend the
(03:00):
rest of their life with. They'realways retiring in a few months. They'll
move anywhere you are. And weshared a couple emails. Now my emails
were pretty short, you know,but I just thought it was weird.
So a couple days later, I'mat work and I show the picture to
my coworker and she goes, didhe say he was in the military?
(03:20):
And I go, yeah, youknow, and she goes, he's a
scammer. And I'm like, whatare you talking about? And she's like
told me the whole deal about romancescammers. I knew nothing. I've learned
a lot but I knew nothing,and so I'm like, oh my god.
You know. So that night whenI came home, I googled the
picture and sure enough, it cameup scammer. So I went sent him
(03:42):
an email and just said, don'tever contact me again. I saw a
picture where it says you're a scammer, blah blah, and then I blocked
him and I was a little freakedout. Now it's nothing, but back
then, I was just like,oh my god, is he gonna find
me? You know, they're notgonna find you. They're over in Nigeria
and Ghana and over that way.So this started to become a regular thing.
You know. I tried our timeand then the big one is plenty
(04:05):
of Fish, which fakes yeah,and it was just guy after guy.
Some of the same guy's pictures wouldbe used over and over on me.
Then, Um, I had aSusanne Twitter account and they were there,
and then I still have the SusanneInstagram account. And how it works on
(04:27):
Instagram is they'll follow me and thenI'll follow them back and within a minute
or two I get a message fromthem, Hi, pretty hey, lovely
lady. Stuff like that, youknow. Um, and then that's just
gone from there. You know.You know, first off, um match
dot com. I've not been onthat one, and that was one you
think it's reputable, I you know, and and and let me also say,
(04:53):
um and I will tell you I'vehad experiences and this is you know,
um I got I'm off of onmind dating. But my brother John
met his first wife she passed frombreast cancer a few years back. In
fact, he know his second wife. I'm sorry, after his wife passed.
He met her on e harmony orwhatever that harmony great match and it's
(05:16):
more and he paid the money.Yeah, so I'm not saying there's not
cameras, but I want to tellyou that the positives. First, UM,
My cousin Catherine went on jay datebecause she wanted to meet a Jewish
band and our you know, Jewishside of the family. Why not she
met him, married him. Um. And I think there was one of
her and another friend of mine whomet somebody on all places and she married
(05:42):
him Tinder. Oh, my daughter'shusband. They met on Tinder. They've
been together for years, so Iknow. And she met him young.
I was actually very upset when Ifound out because he's eleven years older,
but they ended up getting married,so there are positive things to it.
Now, what I'll tell you happenedto me in a real short thing was
about a year ago. A littleover a year ago, my son,
(06:03):
who is now in Boston in college, was visiting and it was Christmas time.
He goes, Mom, you reallyshould meet somebody. I go,
Honey, where am I going tomeet somebody? I'm gonna set you up?
And I said, oh, okay, well I didn't know anything.
I mean, Patsy, he Imean I told him, I said,
just pick out pictures that look likeme. Right, I'm in media.
(06:24):
What am I thinking? Right?I don't know. I'm just innocently doing
this. So he sets me upon hinge and you know, I actually
I would meet somebody at a place. I wouldn't give him my number.
I had burner numbers. Um,I have like five burner phone numbers and
they're worth the money and everything,you know was I didn't. I just
(06:46):
would meet somebody once and then Iwould just burn them and not talk to
them again. Whatever. And thenI did actually meet somebody and we often
on dated for a year. Buthe turned out to be the biggest not
scammer. He just liar um andyou know how I found out he you
(07:11):
know, apparently according to him,it was a situation ship. You've heard
of that new word, and youknow, and I and we had this
whole big thing. But I wasgoing to show and a mutual friend of
iet mine we're talking and she goes, hey, I want to ask you
a question. One of my friendshas gone on a second date with this
guy. And she goes, Imean, he's Hungarian. How many are
on their online? And I go, really, can id she send you
(07:33):
a picture? So she showed methe picture. I go, huh.
So I texted him and said,you know, tomorrow night we're supposed to
go out. Yeah, why don'tyou ask? And I said the girl's
name, I will say it onhere and you know, and he just
and then he didn't answer, andI said, okay, so you're gonna
be a coward and not text meback and just ghost go for it,
be a coward. And then hetexted me back and he's saying it's you
(07:56):
had it wrong. We were nevergood. I could never live with you.
And I go, so it's notjust scammers, it's dishonest jerks that
are on there, and so,you know, my therapist says to me,
what are you thinking it's worth themoney to pay a matchmaker? It
might be a couple grand, butwhy are you especially you're in media.
(08:16):
I didn't know. So that wasmy story. And you know, I'm
such a fool. I was afool that I ever believed for a second.
I go, he said, youwant a relationship, and you know,
and he goes, well, yeah, but we can't live together.
There can only be two weirdos livingtogether. And I'm like, you know,
(08:37):
so, I mean yeah, andI two of my podcast episodes in
the my first year were people whoactually did meet their spouses online, and
it was you know, I telleverybody it works. You just gotta be
careful right now you talk about yourstory. My last podcast episode, which
I encourage everybody to listen to listento them all but that one. And
(09:01):
you can get him. By theway, if you look below online daypath
dot com, you'll have all thelads I have. I have a info
on my blog where you can findmy podcast. Well, I've been on
TikTok's. Uh my TikTok is reallyblown up since February. I started I
started uploading audio conversations proper hashtagging.I learned about that, and I do
(09:22):
lives about three times a week.Um, I went from like twelve hundred
followers to almost seven thousand. Itblows my I have one video that hit
over forty thousand views. My head'sexploding and my daughter's you know, laughing
at me. But anyway, thiswas a lady I met on there and
she called. We talked on thephone for a while and she wanted to
(09:45):
tell me her story and so,uh it's and she did. Eventually she
did my podcast. But basically,she was living in Texas, met this
guy through online dating. He seemedperfect, you know, he got a
job and he everything was perfect.And then she had to move to one
of the Carolinas because her mother hasdementia. And he's like, I'll go
(10:07):
there with you, and grand momlives in the middle of nowhere. And
it got bad, it got verybad. She's fine, she's met someone
new. The first thing she saidto the new guy is let's go get
fingerprinted at the police station. Andhe said sure, but I please listen
to it. Because this guy,she found this box that had all these
(10:31):
different ideas it turned out he hadactually spent time in jail for murder.
Oh my god. Yeah, andyou know, to get help in some
states just don't have big domestic abuselaws. And she had talked to a
police officer and he goes, well, the best we could do is hold
him for forty eight hours, butthen we have to release them. So
(10:54):
but you can listen it from her, her story, her point of view.
It has a happy ending for her, but it's a very scary story.
It's very scary. I mean,I did put on on my on
what I did hinge. I said, can you add on there too?
Because my son set it up?And I said, just add on there
because this is true. I willlook you up on case net, you
(11:16):
know. And so at least youyou know, and I knew I was
getting at least some of them weren'tas bad. And I did have,
you know, guys, they werenice guys on first dates. It just
they weren't for me. And ummy first one was, oh, that
was not good. And so Ikind of just and and and they cuss
at you and all that other stuff. It's like, I'm sorry, I
(11:37):
don't like you. You know,what are you gonna do so um,
but yeah, I mean, whatdoes somebody you know? Other other than
there is no place. I mean, you know, my son was saying,
you've been um divorced for cosh tenyears, I think, and you
know during the pandemic, of course, you don't have a way to meet
somebody. Me doing what I do? You know, I've got a hundred
(12:01):
emails every day, a guy goinghey, and then I gotta you know,
there's there's the listeners, and theycould be wonderful, but I don't
know. There's the listeners asking meout. And then I've got the scammers
on Instagram and on Facebook, TikTok, and it's like, where does somebody?
And I can't tell you how manytimes people say to me, I
look at you, why are yousingle? Yeah? Yeah, you tell
(12:26):
me where do I meet somebody?And so I mean, that's that's kind
of where it's at. And Ihave not I've heard that way more from
women than men. And I actuallysaid to this guy after it was all
said, then I go, youdo realize that no matter who you are,
to me, you are God.I was the best. And because
(12:46):
I know, I mean that soundsunhumbled, but I know I'm smart,
I'm successful, I don't need formoney, and I think I'm okay looking.
You know, I try to keepmyself up so and they just kind
of agreed. No'm like you screwedup though, And I mean I wouldn't
go back to somebody like that.But um, but I mean, where
(13:07):
does somebody mean? Are there anygood online dating sites? I don't know.
I just you know, I getasked that a lot. I get
asked a lot of questions from theladies on TikTok and um, I go
try online dating, but just bevery careful and you know, just um.
There was a there's a web wonderfulwebsite and I had them on my
(13:28):
podcast in December. It's called advocatingagainst Romance Scammers and they have some really
great it's a great card where theyhave all this information like story scammers use,
how to spot a fake account,red flags, and how to stay
safe online. Um, they're they'readvocating against waits, advocating for fo R
(13:52):
and the letter U dot com.How how they started this was the lady
on their a friend got scammed andit turned out he was It was someone
using an army guy picture Kathy Trackthe guy down and he's like, this
has been going on for years,people using because he's retired colonel and people
(14:15):
have been using his pictures for years, you know. So I send everybody
to their site, you know,and I have and my TikTok's, I
have signs. And one guy goessomeone thinks You're signs are stupid. I
go, well, tell them,don't come on. I mean, everybody
else likes my signs because I havepeople say hey, hold up that sign
with your contact information and they'll screenshotit so they can email me. I
love a little old school stuff goingon like that. Oh I got like
(14:37):
a stack like this. Oh Ilove this. What I would love to
do is we should do a TikTokparody of because what I some of the
things on TikTok, the guys,the guys that are all a good looking
they're going, ladies, this iswhat you know, A real man wouldn't
do this. This is and I'mthinking, you do realize that all he's
(15:00):
doing this for us to get followersmeans that's scamming you. But still it's
just dumb. And you know,I've liked him before. And then I
went, wait a second what amI doing? They're all doing it.
It's almost like the beauty tutorials,except there's some handsome guy telling me what
I should and shouldn't want as awoman, Like I don't know this,
you know, yeah, and Iare not real. Yeah. I actually
joined thick tak two years ago,but it just started to really kick in
(15:22):
this February. But I noticed whenI first started and guys would follow me
and I'm like, I recognize thatguy. I recognize that picture because I
have a database where I've collected likeall the pictures. And that was a
question. So that was a questionI have because I wanted to start and
I didn't know if you could dosomething like this, because I thought,
can you do a private Facebook group? Right? This area specific? And
(15:48):
it's just between us girls? Thisis and somebody can say, hey,
this is who I went out with. You can go out with him if
you want, but this is whatI dealt with with him, because especially
in an area like this, weall are it's a small it's big,
but it's small. Is that doyou think we could do that? I'm
in I am. I think Ithink it would be a great idea.
(16:11):
Yeah, well that's what I tellall the ladies that you know, and
we have one guy. His name'sWayne. He's hilarious and he's part of
Who Called Who. Every time I'mon live, he comes on and I'm
always like, hey, ladies andWayne, you know, and he's just
a wonderful guy. I'm trying toconnect with him because he was scammed and
I want to get him on mypodcast. But um, that's what I
(16:33):
always say, and go, Look, we're here for each other. I
love you. You were in aspace, safe space, and I have
women you know right now. Um, I'm going to write a book I've
been wanting starting here and there,and then I stopped. And a couple
of weeks ago, I was onTikTok talking I want to write a book
about everything that I've learned and allthis stuff, but I'm not sure what
(16:53):
direction I want to take it.Then one of my TikTok friends, Rindy
goes, I got a great idea, you should collect women's stories who were
actually scammed. So I'm like,oh my god, that's a great idea.
So I did a video on thereabout it. So far, I've
gotten seven stories. I have otherladies I don't have a deadline. Yet
(17:17):
I have other ladies who were like, I'm working on it now. Some
are like afraid because they're afraid they'llget found by the scammer or something.
So I don't pressure that, andI always tell them give me a fake
name, don't use your real name, and just kind of let me know
what country am, because this isworldwide. I have ladies on Australia and
(17:37):
Germany and United Kingdom and Finland.I have one lady from Finland who set
me her story and it was hardto because her English wasn't good. So
I'm like trying to. That's whatI worked on last week when my wife
I was out. I was goingthrough the stories to do grammatic corrections and
punctuation and all that stuff, butwhich I will probably do like on Amazon,
(18:00):
you know, because I was goingto ask if you if you I
will volunteer to be the announcer ifyou need it. Hi, this is
you know, online dating with Patsy, the real stories, you know,
I really would. I would loveto do that, yeah, but I
just want to be a part ofit. What that's such a because it's
so important so well, you know, and again I've I've never I've always
(18:23):
wanted to talk with you for allthese years, especially I know I sent
you guys stuff all the time,yea and Christmas cards, and it just
so happened. I just went,I finally have time, which you know
I never usually do, and um, and this is and because of what
just happened, and I thought,you know what, And again I wasn't
(18:47):
scammed. Maybe emotionally, yeah,you know, but but again I think
that it's it's being together with womenthat have been through their men, mostly
women, and having each other's box. That's what my TikTok has turned into.
I mean, I get emails andquestions every day, you know.
Can you see what you can findout with this picture? I have the
(19:11):
reverse the app on my phone,and then the Advocating page did a video
on a place called the Dark Night, where it can search a picture even
better than the reverse the app canshow you pictures that probably is him,
could be him, the percentage ofif this is the guy or not.
And I have ladies on there.You know, I hold my sign up
(19:32):
for the web address. It's alsoon my blog, but I hold it
up and they're like, oh man, this is great, this is great.
I mean, I learned from them. Besides them, I get a
lot of messages. Gosh, Iwish I would have found you months ago.
I was scammed and and I tellevery one of them, just you
(19:52):
went through this. It's over.Don't beat yourself up about it. Move
on and show others and share you'velearned so that I don't fall for it
and you're awesome. Don't let ittear you apart. Don't let it get
you down. You know, Igo, You know, I always offer
everybody what's talk on the phone.I'll talk on the phone. I can't
get your money back, but Ican be your biggest cheerleader. I can
(20:15):
make you laugh, and I canremind you what a phenomenal person you are.
And I think sometimes because that's whothey hit. These cameras hit the
vulnerable women, the widows, theone who looks like they couldn't get a
man. I always laugh because I'mthinking, dude, if you think I'm
lonely, you do not know me. I know, but I play.
(20:37):
I play the lonely lady, youknow when I'm talking to them. But
I mean, I've just met somany phenomenal women on TikTok who are nice
enough to share their stories with me, and I do it about three nights
a week. I couldn't last weekbecause my wife I was down. And
when the one night Thursday, Idid a video on my phone. I
said, look, I haven't beenon because my wife I's down. I'll
(20:59):
be back. And I got backon Friday and people were like, we
missed because it was the previous weekendsince I went on, and they were
like, we missed you. Wethought something happened. Oh that's I'm like,
I better do the tell them aboutmy WiFi, and I will be
back Friday night. You know,I love this. I love well,
I'll be on there Friday, Fridaynight. What time I know it's a
central time. Well this was least. Oh, I'll let you know.
It was last Friday when I wasable to get buck on. Actually after
(21:23):
tonight I'm gonna do a live.Um. But it's I'm like I said,
I learned stuff from everybody else andI you know, I just share
everything I know and I the everybodyis just so nice on there, and
um, I just made so manywonderful friends. Um. I get,
like I said, I get lotsof messages now and sometimes I feel bad
(21:44):
because somebody will post during the livedid you check my pictures that I sent
you? And I'm like, I'mtrying. I just can't keep up with
them sometimes, but people be patientand yeah. Yeah, and maybe if
that group, if we can startthat Facebook group or something, then that
another way to share. Um.I don't know the legalities of it.
I don't know if you can ornot. I mean, can you I
(22:04):
don't. You can make it,Yeah, you can make it a private
group. Um, you know byinvitation. I belong to a Star Trek
fan group with a bunch of ladiesI've known for years. And it's Oh
that was the other reason, bythe way, that was the other reason
I had to contact you. I'ma total Um, I'm a total sci
fi nerd. Oh my god.If I am fantasy nerd and a gamer,
So what what's that? Yeah?Did you watch Piccard Season three?
(22:27):
I have not. Okay, II think I stopped all these I stopped
all these like prescription or subscriptions perspectivesthose I haven't said. Subscription I got.
I got rid of all my moviechannels so I could keep all my
Yeah, I'm just kind of likepicking and choosing I'll do one for three
months because I have ce a show. But so yeah, um, but
(22:48):
yeah, that was the other reason. Anyway, I didn't mean dire.
I just thought a fellow sci fifantasy gamer nerd oh I do is my
game? But I can't find iton Steam because my CDs don't work on
Windows ten. So oh well yeahWindows ten gotta love that. Yeah,
yeah, yeah, so it wasone of them. So are there,
(23:10):
um, of all of the sites, what do you think which ones besides
oh, I mean obviously, okay, Cupid's pretty bad, a plenty of
fish. I mean when I saybad, I don't want to get in
trouble for Hey, sorry guys,you're not advertising with me though, So
but which ones are the ones thatyou think? You think? Instagram?
Uh? Yeah, Instagram is uh, well, of course I'm talking about
(23:33):
Yeah. Um, let me tellyou a story. There's tons of fake
celebrities that have contacted me. Um. I'm a huge Chris Evens fan,
and I have had so many fakeChris Evens content I don't know, says
stupid? How do they like?Why would people think that you're gonna fall
for that? Um? It's Imean, I've had Chris Evans, Chris
Chris Pratt wanted a forty dollars iTunescard. I'm like, really, you're
(23:56):
regarding the Galaxy dude, right,Um, you know Chris Evant, the
fake Chris Evan. Actually now Idon't even play with it anymore because I
posted enough of his stories. Butit's just all this stuff he says,
and they want to get you,like you need a fan card to meet
me, and it's twenty five hundreddollars, you know. And I played
along. I'm like, oh sure. And then I have scammer signs that
(24:19):
I made, say, Hi,scammer, how's Nigeria? Another one is
um Franken for from Rocky Horror andit says, uh, you got caught?
How about that? Because I wasspeaking of Sweet trans Festade, I
think it was so but uh butno, it's it's I have all kinds
(24:41):
of fun things I do with theseguys. I really mess with them.
Um, I play along, youknow, Like I said, if you
read my blog, please know thatthat's not really Patsy talking. That's Suzanne.
I will play the game and thenI come in for the takedown.
If someone told me the one timethat they like my takedown, you know,
and that's your alter Susanne's your alterego. Yes, because like when
(25:04):
I'm on my TikTok and I'll say, well, Susanne's account, But then
I feel like every time I haveto explain for those of you who don't
know who Susanne is, She's me, but that's who I go by,
you know, and um. Andthen I have like all my audio conversations
on YouTube, but they're also onmy blog, and then I upload one
(25:25):
every couple of days on TikTok becauseI do voices and bad accents. But
so many of the ladies are like, oh no, we love it.
We think it's great. You know, it's obtaining and informative all at once.
Yes. The other night, oneof the gals goes, well,
you need to do an Irish one, and I said, well, you
know, I did an Irish oneone time, but then at that moment
(25:48):
I couldn't pull it out. I'mlike, I can't remember my mom It
was a way a little lassie Willie. I love your little pig hair,
right, could you give me threethousand dollars? Well, I kept thinking
of the Irish Brett soap commercial.I just think of Pink Cartello, Moon
Green Clovers. Yes, every singletibe. Oh my gosh. I mean,
(26:11):
I guess I've gotten lucky as faras not m being scammed, like
not that I would allow myself tobe scammed by money. Only one time
there was a guy that I wastalking to, um, and he was
from Texas, and he kept sayinghe was going to come out, and
then I finally just ended it becauseI'm like, you're married whatever. I
(26:33):
don't believe anything. This xed himout. Too good to be true.
Yeah, Well, the grammar andthe way they write to you. Um,
it's horrible. If I was anEnglish teacher, I think I'd be
pulling my hair out or teaching themhow to talk right. Um. The
other thing is the sweet talk.I do a thing on my podcast and
I did some on short TikTok videosearlier in the year before I did the
(26:59):
others. It's called scammer sweet talk, And I play soft music in the
background, romantic music, and Iread And I'm telling you, when I
read these, I am reading themfor word to word, and sometimes they
don't make sense, Oh my god, because they don't know how to because
they're from somewhere else they're in thenyou know, close somewhere other country or
something, and they're trying to speakEnglish and wow, oh but some of
(27:22):
it is hilarious. That's the otherthing I want to do is I want
to pull the screenshots of all thescammer sweet talk and put it all like
a little in a little thing andwe like in the back of your book
or something. That's a good idea, but for the for the printed book,
I would definitely do. That'd beawesome. Yeah. Yeah, So
(27:44):
there's a lot of stuff for peopleto go through online dating with Patsy dot
com. There's, um, obviouslyyou've got the YouTube channel, the podcast,
You've got the TikTok and and Ithink that, um, you're creating
this community. Um and and maybeone day the scammers will be gone.
I doubt it. Wouldn't that belovely? The one of the gals last
(28:07):
week asked, you think this willever stop? And not as long as
social media is around, you know, And I don't want it to go
away because I use it for alot of stuff. But you know,
I just tell everybody, you gotto be cautious out there. You know,
what are the first what is thelike if let's say, okay,
I'm gonna go back on forget hand, I'm not doing that one. Um,
and I decide I'm gonna go onI don't know whatever site. And
(28:32):
what would be the things that youwould say, Okay, this is what
you need to do, Judy.Well, the first thing is if they
send you a message and they knowI mean, like, what do I
post like as my like? First, let's start with a profile. What
would you put on? Oh,well, my account. I do have
an account on plenty of Fish,but I use my pictures, but it's
under Suzanne. But that in there, I list all the stuff I actually
(28:52):
do like like I like sports,I like movies, music, theater.
I'm trying to think what I haveon there. But then you know,
the one description which I thought wasreally cool was I put in there.
Um, Now, I have friendsthat I like to hang out with,
and I know you will have friendsthat you hang out with. I'm not
going to be jealous your friends whenyou need a boy's night out, and
(29:15):
I don't want you to be jealouswhen I need a girl's night out.
I just thought, not that I'mlooking, but I just thought that would
be something to say. Hey,look, I'm not glued to you.
You're not glued to me. Idon't like to be smothered. And uh,
you know, I like my time, you know. So I mean,
if you're doing a legitimate profile,just be honest. I state in
(29:40):
mind, I'm a liberal, youknow. You know, I'm like,
that's me, you know. ButI don't really talk politics with anybody,
you know. But you're not goingto change me, and I'm not going
to change you, you know.But I mean, I just I'm very
honest and I want to say blunt. That might be too harsh of a
word, but just no, youhave to be honest and and and you
(30:00):
know what, I um, oneof the things hype, I was very
very like, I changed my sunputs on one thing and I go,
oh, come on, and Iput on there. If you're an effing
dot dot dot scammer, you willbe you know, and I said,
I will definitely report you. Um, I go, I use kseenet um.
If you're not serious about really meetingsomeone, if you're full of crap,
(30:22):
do not contact me, you know. I mean, I really was
in bold and um. This oneguy went out with him a couple of
times. He was okay, butum he he actually said to me,
look, I if have you lookedme up on k Senet yet? And
I said not yet, but Iwas about to, because you will see
I had a DUI I ten yearsago. You know I've quit drinking ten
(30:44):
years ago. I gave the guya chance. He was honest. Um,
we just didn't get along that good, you know, but but that
happens. But I was actually reallyimpressed that he said that, and like
how many guys would say that?So, um, yeah, I think
you're right honesty. And and nowokay, so now you've got your profile
out. Um. And the onething I will say about Hinge that I
(31:07):
did like was that they couldn't pickyou. You had to pick them first.
I think that's how Bumble is too. Is that one where I didn't
have. Yeah, I didn't haveBumble didn't do me well at all.
So we stories there were scammers onthere too, everywhere everywhere. Um so
now okay, now you you youlike somebody, Now what are some of
(31:30):
the just I know it's sweet talk, but what are other some little red
flags maybe somebody would not know.I notice on plenty of fish and amatch
dot com you know, I putI'm from Saint Louis. I want somebody
from Saint Louis hall put that inyour profile. Yeah, yeah, I'll
get all these guys, well,oh, I'm in the military, and
(31:52):
oh I'm from Saint Louis. Oh, well, what part of Saint Luis
did you grow up in? Youknow? I lie and say, oh,
I'm I'm in Le dou where youyou know? And they can't always
that are the famous Saint Louis questionhigh school? Yeah, and I had
one guy, Well, I didn'tgo to high school there. I went
to high school in New York.Okay, whatever. Um let me think.
(32:12):
I noticed on Hinge a lot ofpilots. I don't. I'm like,
why pilots? Yeah yeah, reallysome of the ones that um like
story scammera use I'll run through thesereal quick. Oil rig workers. They'll
say they're on oil. They'll evenpost pictures being on the oil rig.
I don't know if they're from wherethey found them, right, Yeah,
(32:34):
deployed military, which we all know, fake celebrities, Oh yeah, doctors,
United Nations employees, and any professionwith the reason to travel. So
well, like you said, whenyou get a message from somebody. First
off, if it's a term ofendearment to me, that's a red flag
because I none of the guys Iknow is gonna send a note to a
lady that they don't know, Hi, pretty, Hi beautiful. It'll be
(32:59):
more like a hey or something likethat. You know. Um. Then
of course, look at the waythey type the grammar. Although I am
guilty because I use the voice recognitiona lot and I don't always proof freed
it. And my response is back, sometimes are like I could be a
scammer because none makes sense. SoI have got to learn. I'm learning
(33:23):
getting better at it of proofing itbefore I send it. Um. What
I mean, if if they don'twant to talk to you on the phone
right away or meet right away,what's the point of stringing your how I
am? I had that. Yeah, I'm the same way. And I
even said that in my bio.I said, Look, you know I
didn't say what I did. Ididn't because you know, the minute you
(33:45):
say that, oh great, youknow they're gonna listen or whatever. Um.
And and no, I said,I said, I don't want to
chit chat on here. Let's justyou know, talk or meet somewhere for
coffee. We know right away boomright um. Interestingly enough, another side
of it was I met a gentleman, very nice guy, and he did
(34:06):
want to go on a second date, but I wasn't interested in you.
But he was very nice and hewas so freaked out because I was late
and we were meeting it somewhere andI was really late. I kept,
you know, I'm using my burnerapp, which is really hard to text
from, and um, and he'sgoing, you know, he was starting
to yet like he When I finallygot there, he goes, I was
because I said, can you justcome out? I can't find parking and
(34:29):
he didn't want to come out andI couldn't understand. I want a jerk.
When I finally got in, hegoes, how do I know there
wasn't some guy who was going tobeat me up? And I go,
wow, I guess so like hewas smart? Yeah, yeah, you
know, because he goes, whatyou're sitting there saying you can't find it?
I go, look, it's raining, my hair's getting all gross.
It was funny, but it doesgo both ways, and he said he
(34:52):
goes, well, he goes,you know you're you're you know on te
and you're this and then you know, yeah, so I don't. I
don't have a burner phone, butI have an app number that I use,
which is like yeah, and it'sfree. And so whenever these guys
you know, give me your number, well, I'm not going to give
you my real number. I giveyou this one because if you punch it
(35:14):
in to try to find it,you're not going to find anything, you
know, because it's that you know. So. But most of those,
the one thing I will tell youdating sites and other social media once they
want to take you off that platformto like Google Chat or What's app,
that's another red flag because yeah,WhatsApp, that's another one. I don't
(35:36):
join that one because it won't acceptmy app number and I'm sure it's heck
not going to put in my realnumber. But that's just another platform.
There's also Telegram and Wisdom I think, and a couple others I can't remember.
But you don't want to move offof there because um the one video
that I did a duet on TikToktalks about this and basically I guess they
(35:58):
can't be tracked over there, butif they you keep on the main like
Instagram or Twitter. Then I guessthey can be monitored or whatever. But
oh, that's a great tip,Patsy. But yeah, don't ever leave
the social If they say, oh, well, let's go over to Google
Chat and talk, No, I'llstay here. And that's what I do.
I tell them, oh, no, I'll stay here. Oh though
(36:20):
sometimes I do go over to GoogleChat. But most of the time I
will be like, no, let'sstay here. Are like when I try
to video chat them, I nevershow myself. When they are insistent that
I show myself, I put onmy Jason mask. You'll see it in
my videos that I But most ofthe time I have my phone face in
(36:43):
the ceiling so they can't see me, and it will chat and I record
it on my computer. I havea microphone I set up by my phone
so that it'll pick up everything theysay. And but yeah, and then
I've got like noisemakers and toys andother stuff. But I mean I will
talk to them and on the rorcasianthat they will show themselves. I'm able
to scamp a picture, so Ido have pictures of actual scammers on my
(37:05):
blog. Wow, that's another thingI show on TikTok. I'm like,
hey, who wants to see thescammers? You know? Yeah, show
them? Or are we have oneswe call frequent flyers. Somebody came up
with that name for me on there. I used to call them repeaters.
These are guys whose pictures have beenused on me over and over and over,
but a different name every time.Wow. So um, they're the
(37:28):
same ones that are the telemarketers.I'm telling you, I think really believed.
Well, I just learned something lastweek and this is hilarious. How
I found it. I was bingingon The Good Wife on Paramount and the
one episode somebody was being scammed andthey talked about the Sucker List, and
so I went out and googled SuckerList. And basically, it's like any
(37:52):
other company who would sell your informationso they can send you junk mail.
It's the Sucker List is shared amongstother scammers and other things like that.
Now, I haven't done enough researchto see if I could find the Sucker
List. One of the last Hattieget off of it and then yeah,
now there's been like CBS did thestory CN and that was two that I
(38:13):
saw, But I haven't had achance to go and actually research it more.
But google sucker list and see whatyou find out. Let me know.
And by the way, you know, Patsy is doing this while she
has another full time job, solet's try in to support her so that
this can be her full time jobbecause we need. Yeah, I'm sick,
(38:34):
really, but I can't retire yetbecause I can't afford to. I
you know what, we all alot of us are in boats very similar,
you know, or we just haveto work. I like my job.
I like my job. I'm actuallyhome three days a week and two
days in the office, so ifthat works out well, you know.
But like when I'm at home,I work till three, and it's like
as soon as I get off work, unplugged the laptop, I'm automatically on
(38:59):
doing this about five ten after three. Wow. Yeah, it's a lot.
It's a lot. And again,I love your passion and I love
how just you're very very um Whatis the word I don't want to I
don't think it's pass I don't thinkit's enthusiastic. But what I say persistent,
and I mean that in a sucha positive way. There was a
(39:21):
word I was using and I canremember it on my head because I thought,
gosh, this is how you know, this is how successful people they
work, and I continue to workand you do. Because I was interviewed
twice by Channel five the last sixyears. The last one was um in
November of twenty twenty p J.Randallwark. They came to my house and
(39:45):
we did it outside because of COVIDand stuff. Right, wonderful woman,
absolutely wonderful, nice woman. She'sthe one who I was talking with her
and I said, I really I'vebeen taking podcast classes through the Saint Louis
Library on line and by the way, check out your library. They got
so many awesome classes. Yeah,it was free and it was like an
(40:07):
hour a month, you know,and they hit on different topics and I
was telling her, you know,I really want to start a podcast about
this, and she was just like, you have to, you must.
So she was a big supporter.We exchanged a couple emails. I did
a practice podcast and put it outon my Google Drive and gave her access
and then she gave me some greattips and then she took a job in
(40:28):
Seattle. But she was a bigsupporter and I'm forever grateful to her and
Pat McConnell was my first interviews.He's wonderful. What a great family he
has too. Yes, Yeah,we talked about our family and stuff before
(40:50):
the interview and after. So he'sa good guy. He's tb he's to
do reports from when I was overat the other station. Yeah, So,
I mean, I'm always sending stuffout emailing. Um, let me
ask you this question, Judy.I trust your your your advice. You
know, I email all this stuffout and maybe I should do this.
(41:10):
I'm not shire or anything, butdo I dare and say, hey,
I would really love to be onyour morning show. I think I have
something important to say that. Well, I mean, I don't want to
be too aggressive, even though Iknow I think that you should. You
have to do that because no one'sdoing it for you. We don't.
You know, you don't have anagent, you don't have so guests you
should and you can't. You emailedme the message me this morning. I
(41:34):
gotta tell you, I just aboutdied. I was texting everybody. Oh
unless you contacted me. Well,see, here's the great thing. By
doing this, you're gonna I'm gonnabe able to get you on there.
And it's gonna live longer because Iget to put it on the podcast.
I gotta put it on a socialismmy YouTube and all is and then um
and use some of it. Youknow, I do believe you have a
recording on your end. If youwant to use any on TikTok, go
(41:57):
for it. Oh, I will. And I'm I mean when I am
a guest on somebody's podcast, Ishare it everywhere too because I want people
to I'll be talking about it onTikTok later tonight. So give me hey,
and and and what if they whatif they say something like there,
because some of those scammers can reallylook into you and find out about you,
which is good name is for me, it's really scary, ye like
(42:22):
really scary. Um. And andif they listen to the show, they
know what I'm into and they'll say, hey, I'm a Libra. We're
supposed to get along. I meanthat's kind of the sweet talk you talk
about, right yeah? Yeah?And really, on the other social media
apps, my identity is pretty hidden. Um, But on TikTok, I
(42:44):
can't hide it because I'm trying toactually reach the people that need to know
all this information. And that's whatthe whole thing is it's getting out there
educating women and men. The otherstory, UM, which is heartbreaking,
and I've heard this from many,it's when someone is involved in an online
scam and they're talking to this guy. They don't want to believe it when
(43:07):
you tell them they're a scammer.It's very difficult. I get a message
once in a while. I hada lady from church emailed me a couple
of years ago, and you know, I said, well, this is
what should tell her. UM,I am happy to talk to her if
you need be. I have donethat twice. M. But that's the
hard part is convincing them because youknow, then they feel dumb, and
(43:29):
then they feel stupid, and it'slike, don't feel that way. And
it's easier for me to say thatbecause I've never been scammed. But I
can just you know, I cansit and listen and I can remind you
that you're gonna be okay and you'reawesome and you know. But that's that's
another problem we run into. It'slike, okay, how do you get
them to stop? You know,well, it's the same as if some
(43:50):
your husband or wife is cheating onyou and your best friends and you're like,
uh yeah, and you find outwell they were sample. Yeah,
same thing. It's just getting theword out there. And um, you
know, I give out free Tshirts that advertise my blog and podcast.
I saw the hair band I sell. Yes, I love I love that
(44:12):
stuff. But if you love swag, um yeah. I have a cricket
machine and I bought it specifically todo my T shirts and stuff and hats.
And then I started making other sweatshirtsand selling those last year, especially
in October and December, because Ihad some really cool Halloween sweatshirts and Christmas
sweatshirts. But you're gonna be goodif we could get some made. And
(44:35):
then eventually you get big enough wherethe women take pictures of themselves for these
sites and it says I don't getscam thanks to online dating with Patsy or
something like that. I'm stealing that, don't scam me. I follow online,
you know, and and then yourpictures and it's right there in your
picture. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I always generate ideas you can have
(44:55):
it. I love it. Well. Like I said the book, I
someone really took it into a differentdirection for me, and that night,
I don't think I could sleep.I was so excited. I think this
is great and I hope this isn'tthe last I talk to you. Obviously
we'll do it again. And umand yeah follow so TikTok, YouTube everywhere.
(45:21):
It's all online dating with Patsy dotcom. And she needs your story.
You got a good scammer story.Yeah, we all need to share
these. And you don't have touse your real name. You can make
up a name I've had. Itold them all make up names I do
want. You don't have to tellme what state, trimp if you're from
the United States or wherever, justso people can get an idea. It's
not just us, it's all overthe world, you know. So so
(45:44):
yeah for TikTok, which is mybig one, it's just online dating with
Patsy Okay, I oh, ifI follow you, If not, I
will you must I will definitely ladAnd then yeah, and the Twitter and
Instagram are the same. It's Patsyonline date. And again all this is
on my blog. You can findall that information of where to find me,
(46:06):
how to contact me. I havemy email out there, I have
a contact form. Um, youknow, it's all there. And again
I'm so you're inspiring to me thatyou do this really just just too out
of love. You know, youdo this from the kindness of your heart,
and I really just want to tellyou thank you for keeping doing it.
(46:29):
It really means a lot I get. I get a lot of that,
and I just like, oh,you know, I this started out
as a hobby. Um. I'ma big fan of the movie Julia and
Julia, and that's where my inspirationto start a blog. Julia. Julie
Powell died last fall and what shethinks she had a hearttech but she was
also sick with COVID And when Isaw that, I bust into tears because,
(46:52):
oh, you know, if you'veseen the movie, she was so
in awe of Julia child right,I was so in of Julie Powell,
you know. So it's like whenshe died, it was like, I'm
not going to get to meet it. I did send her husband because I
found their address. I'm good atfinding stuff. I did send him a
sippy card. Now I never expectedto hear back, but I wrote him
(47:13):
telling him who I am. Iwas a big fan. I she was
my inspiration to start a blog.And so when she passed away. I
was really sad. You know,I got over it, but yeah,
you know, it was just thatfirst night, it was just like what,
you know, it's crazy, she'sso young. I don't sorties.
I think, yeah, yeah,yeah, wow. Well you know what,
(47:37):
I love what you like. Isaid, I love what you're doing.
And uh, I can't wait tosee you again. I love your
pink hair. Thank you. We'llsee. I'm also the one lady who's
kind of gives me a lot ofadvice on some of the stuff on TikTok,
and she's like, you need likea catch thing, like the Pink
Lady says, So I'm trying tothrow that in there, you know,
(47:58):
the Pink Lady. You know.So I love it. Anybody any ideas,
you know, throw it out there. The Pink Lady says what he
says. So, I mean,you're you know, this is evolving into
and I really do believe that ourlifetimes that we pick our little bodies to
be in big bodies, whatever bodieswe are, the soul, it kind
of what we're supposed to do.If you're doing what you're passionate about,
(48:20):
you're supposed to be doing that.It finds you, and I think it
found you and you're just really sharingthis with people and it's an important thing
to share. Yeah, thank okay, thank you, thank you. Hey,
well, I'm excited and I can'twait to talk to you again.
Patsy and I always end everything withNAMA, stay well. Thank you,
Patsy Roach, Patsy, you havebeen reaching out to me for a long
time. I'm a pest. No, you know what I have to tell
you. Everything happens for a reason, and timing is everything. And honestly,
I've always wanted to talk to youbecause what you do is amazing.
But the biggest thing I have tosay is you're very empowering because you are
(00:25):
very very You're passionate, and youjust keep working and working and working at
it, and you're getting somewhere withit. In fact, you're getting somewhere
really big. So talk about inone or two sentences, what do you
do, and then we'll go moredeeply into it. Sure, I have
a blog that I've had for sixyears, and then I've been podcasting for
(00:46):
two years, and it's all mystories and actual screenshots and recorded conversations with
online romance scammers. And it's notjust dating sites, it's all social media
right now, most of mine comefrom instagramm interesting. Yeah, So I
try to show women and men thereare men who do get scammed, how
(01:08):
not to fall for them, andI give them all the tips. And
if you listen to my auto recordaudio recordings, you will hear me interact
with them. I play a charactera lot of times. I go by
the name of Susanne, which isSusanne sugar Baker from Designing Women. Huge
fan of that show, and soI go by Susanne, so I don't
(01:29):
go by Patsy at all. Andthen the picture I have on my profile
is an older one from probably howmany years ago. It was a little
thinner and I had sharp brown hair. I started the pink in twenty twenty,
So I mean it's my actual picturesthat I do use. I just
don't use my name. So let'sstart from the very beginning. Let's start
(01:51):
at the very Sorry I'm staying thesame thing. That funny. So I
want to know when did you whatwas that made you want to do this?
Obviously something happened to you. Wasit the first time out? Yeah?
Well, first off, I neversent anybody money. I'm very suspicious
of people. No, it wasin twenty sixteen. I was sitting in
(02:15):
church and on the back of thechurch bullet and I'm Catholic and they had
an ad for Catholic match dot com. Now not looking for anybody, still
not looking for anybody, But itwas curiosity Now, nothing happened there,
but I was telling a coworker aboutit and they're like, oh, you
should trymatch dot com and I'm like, oh, okay. So I set
up an account with match dot comand right away I got an email from
(02:38):
a guy who said he was inthe army on a peacekeeping mission named that
country is always my response, Andit was just all the sweet talk and
how beautiful you are, and Imean, I know I am, but
you are. It's you know,but it's like it was just a lot
of sweet talk and they're looking for, you know, someone to spend the
(03:00):
rest of their life with. They'realways retiring in a few months. They'll
move anywhere you are. And weshared a couple emails. Now my emails
were pretty short, you know,but I just thought it was weird.
So a couple days later, I'mat work and I show the picture to
my coworker and she goes, didhe say he was in the military?
(03:20):
And I go, yeah, youknow, and she goes, he's a
scammer. And I'm like, whatare you talking about? And she's like
told me the whole deal about romancescammers. I knew nothing. I've learned
a lot but I knew nothing,and so I'm like, oh my god.
You know. So that night whenI came home, I googled the
picture and sure enough, it cameup scammer. So I went sent him
(03:42):
an email and just said, don'tever contact me again. I saw a
picture where it says you're a scammer, blah blah, and then I blocked
him and I was a little freakedout. Now it's nothing, but back
then, I was just like,oh my god, is he gonna find
me? You know, they're notgonna find you. They're over in Nigeria
and Ghana and over that way.So this started to become a regular thing.
You know. I tried our timeand then the big one is plenty
(04:05):
of Fish, which fakes yeah,and it was just guy after guy.
Some of the same guy's pictures wouldbe used over and over on me.
Then, Um, I had aSusanne Twitter account and they were there,
and then I still have the SusanneInstagram account. And how it works on
(04:27):
Instagram is they'll follow me and thenI'll follow them back and within a minute
or two I get a message fromthem, Hi, pretty hey, lovely
lady. Stuff like that, youknow. Um, and then that's just
gone from there. You know.You know, first off, um match
dot com. I've not been onthat one, and that was one you
think it's reputable, I you know, and and and let me also say,
(04:53):
um and I will tell you I'vehad experiences and this is you know,
um I got I'm off of onmind dating. But my brother John
met his first wife she passed frombreast cancer a few years back. In
fact, he know his second wife. I'm sorry, after his wife passed.
He met her on e harmony orwhatever that harmony great match and it's
(05:16):
more and he paid the money.Yeah, so I'm not saying there's not
cameras, but I want to tellyou that the positives. First, UM,
My cousin Catherine went on jay datebecause she wanted to meet a Jewish
band and our you know, Jewishside of the family. Why not she
met him, married him. Um. And I think there was one of
her and another friend of mine whomet somebody on all places and she married
(05:42):
him Tinder. Oh, my daughter'shusband. They met on Tinder. They've
been together for years, so Iknow. And she met him young.
I was actually very upset when Ifound out because he's eleven years older,
but they ended up getting married,so there are positive things to it.
Now, what I'll tell you happenedto me in a real short thing was
about a year ago. A littleover a year ago, my son,
(06:03):
who is now in Boston in college, was visiting and it was Christmas time.
He goes, Mom, you reallyshould meet somebody. I go,
Honey, where am I going tomeet somebody? I'm gonna set you up?
And I said, oh, okay, well I didn't know anything.
I mean, Patsy, he Imean I told him, I said,
just pick out pictures that look likeme. Right, I'm in media.
(06:24):
What am I thinking? Right?I don't know. I'm just innocently doing
this. So he sets me upon hinge and you know, I actually
I would meet somebody at a place. I wouldn't give him my number.
I had burner numbers. Um,I have like five burner phone numbers and
they're worth the money and everything,you know was I didn't. I just
(06:46):
would meet somebody once and then Iwould just burn them and not talk to
them again. Whatever. And thenI did actually meet somebody and we often
on dated for a year. Buthe turned out to be the biggest not
scammer. He just liar um andyou know how I found out he you
(07:11):
know, apparently according to him,it was a situation ship. You've heard
of that new word, and youknow, and I and we had this
whole big thing. But I wasgoing to show and a mutual friend of
iet mine we're talking and she goes, hey, I want to ask you
a question. One of my friendshas gone on a second date with this
guy. And she goes, Imean, he's Hungarian. How many are
on their online? And I go, really, can id she send you
(07:33):
a picture? So she showed methe picture. I go, huh.
So I texted him and said,you know, tomorrow night we're supposed to
go out. Yeah, why don'tyou ask? And I said the girl's
name, I will say it onhere and you know, and he just
and then he didn't answer, andI said, okay, so you're gonna
be a coward and not text meback and just ghost go for it,
be a coward. And then hetexted me back and he's saying it's you
(07:56):
had it wrong. We were nevergood. I could never live with you.
And I go, so it's notjust scammers, it's dishonest jerks that
are on there, and so,you know, my therapist says to me,
what are you thinking it's worth themoney to pay a matchmaker? It
might be a couple grand, butwhy are you especially you're in media.
(08:16):
I didn't know. So that wasmy story. And you know, I'm
such a fool. I was afool that I ever believed for a second.
I go, he said, youwant a relationship, and you know,
and he goes, well, yeah, but we can't live together.
There can only be two weirdos livingtogether. And I'm like, you know,
(08:37):
so, I mean yeah, andI two of my podcast episodes in
the my first year were people whoactually did meet their spouses online, and
it was you know, I telleverybody it works. You just gotta be
careful right now you talk about yourstory. My last podcast episode, which
I encourage everybody to listen to listento them all but that one. And
(09:01):
you can get him. By theway, if you look below online daypath
dot com, you'll have all thelads I have. I have a info
on my blog where you can findmy podcast. Well, I've been on
TikTok's. Uh my TikTok is reallyblown up since February. I started I
started uploading audio conversations proper hashtagging.I learned about that, and I do
(09:22):
lives about three times a week.Um, I went from like twelve hundred
followers to almost seven thousand. Itblows my I have one video that hit
over forty thousand views. My head'sexploding and my daughter's you know, laughing
at me. But anyway, thiswas a lady I met on there and
she called. We talked on thephone for a while and she wanted to
(09:45):
tell me her story and so,uh it's and she did. Eventually she
did my podcast. But basically,she was living in Texas, met this
guy through online dating. He seemedperfect, you know, he got a
job and he everything was perfect.And then she had to move to one
of the Carolinas because her mother hasdementia. And he's like, I'll go
(10:07):
there with you, and grand momlives in the middle of nowhere. And
it got bad, it got verybad. She's fine, she's met someone
new. The first thing she saidto the new guy is let's go get
fingerprinted at the police station. Andhe said sure, but I please listen
to it. Because this guy,she found this box that had all these
(10:31):
different ideas it turned out he hadactually spent time in jail for murder.
Oh my god. Yeah, andyou know, to get help in some
states just don't have big domestic abuselaws. And she had talked to a
police officer and he goes, well, the best we could do is hold
him for forty eight hours, butthen we have to release them. So
(10:54):
but you can listen it from her, her story, her point of view.
It has a happy ending for her, but it's a very scary story.
It's very scary. I mean,I did put on on my on
what I did hinge. I said, can you add on there too?
Because my son set it up?And I said, just add on there
because this is true. I willlook you up on case net, you
(11:16):
know. And so at least youyou know, and I knew I was
getting at least some of them weren'tas bad. And I did have,
you know, guys, they werenice guys on first dates. It just
they weren't for me. And ummy first one was, oh, that
was not good. And so Ikind of just and and and they cuss
at you and all that other stuff. It's like, I'm sorry, I
(11:37):
don't like you. You know,what are you gonna do so um,
but yeah, I mean, whatdoes somebody you know? Other other than
there is no place. I mean, you know, my son was saying,
you've been um divorced for cosh tenyears, I think, and you
know during the pandemic, of course, you don't have a way to meet
somebody. Me doing what I do? You know, I've got a hundred
(12:01):
emails every day, a guy goinghey, and then I gotta you know,
there's there's the listeners, and theycould be wonderful, but I don't
know. There's the listeners asking meout. And then I've got the scammers
on Instagram and on Facebook, TikTok, and it's like, where does somebody?
And I can't tell you how manytimes people say to me, I
look at you, why are yousingle? Yeah? Yeah, you tell
(12:26):
me where do I meet somebody?And so I mean, that's that's kind
of where it's at. And Ihave not I've heard that way more from
women than men. And I actuallysaid to this guy after it was all
said, then I go, youdo realize that no matter who you are,
to me, you are God.I was the best. And because
(12:46):
I know, I mean that soundsunhumbled, but I know I'm smart,
I'm successful, I don't need formoney, and I think I'm okay looking.
You know, I try to keepmyself up so and they just kind
of agreed. No'm like you screwedup though, And I mean I wouldn't
go back to somebody like that.But um, but I mean, where
(13:07):
does somebody mean? Are there anygood online dating sites? I don't know.
I just you know, I getasked that a lot. I get
asked a lot of questions from theladies on TikTok and um, I go
try online dating, but just bevery careful and you know, just um.
There was a there's a web wonderfulwebsite and I had them on my
(13:28):
podcast in December. It's called advocatingagainst Romance Scammers and they have some really
great it's a great card where theyhave all this information like story scammers use,
how to spot a fake account,red flags, and how to stay
safe online. Um, they're they'readvocating against waits, advocating for fo R
(13:52):
and the letter U dot com.How how they started this was the lady
on their a friend got scammed andit turned out he was It was someone
using an army guy picture Kathy Trackthe guy down and he's like, this
has been going on for years,people using because he's retired colonel and people
(14:15):
have been using his pictures for years, you know. So I send everybody
to their site, you know,and I have and my TikTok's, I
have signs. And one guy goessomeone thinks You're signs are stupid. I
go, well, tell them,don't come on. I mean, everybody
else likes my signs because I havepeople say hey, hold up that sign
with your contact information and they'll screenshotit so they can email me. I
love a little old school stuff goingon like that. Oh I got like
(14:37):
a stack like this. Oh Ilove this. What I would love to
do is we should do a TikTokparody of because what I some of the
things on TikTok, the guys,the guys that are all a good looking
they're going, ladies, this iswhat you know, A real man wouldn't
do this. This is and I'mthinking, you do realize that all he's
(15:00):
doing this for us to get followersmeans that's scamming you. But still it's
just dumb. And you know,I've liked him before. And then I
went, wait a second what amI doing? They're all doing it.
It's almost like the beauty tutorials,except there's some handsome guy telling me what
I should and shouldn't want as awoman, Like I don't know this,
you know, yeah, and Iare not real. Yeah. I actually
joined thick tak two years ago,but it just started to really kick in
(15:22):
this February. But I noticed whenI first started and guys would follow me
and I'm like, I recognize thatguy. I recognize that picture because I
have a database where I've collected likeall the pictures. And that was a
question. So that was a questionI have because I wanted to start and
I didn't know if you could dosomething like this, because I thought,
can you do a private Facebook group? Right? This area specific? And
(15:48):
it's just between us girls? Thisis and somebody can say, hey,
this is who I went out with. You can go out with him if
you want, but this is whatI dealt with with him, because especially
in an area like this, weall are it's a small it's big,
but it's small. Is that doyou think we could do that? I'm
in I am. I think Ithink it would be a great idea.
(16:11):
Yeah, well that's what I tellall the ladies that you know, and
we have one guy. His name'sWayne. He's hilarious and he's part of
Who Called Who. Every time I'mon live, he comes on and I'm
always like, hey, ladies andWayne, you know, and he's just
a wonderful guy. I'm trying toconnect with him because he was scammed and
I want to get him on mypodcast. But um, that's what I
(16:33):
always say, and go, Look, we're here for each other. I
love you. You were in aspace, safe space, and I have
women you know right now. Um, I'm going to write a book I've
been wanting starting here and there,and then I stopped. And a couple
of weeks ago, I was onTikTok talking I want to write a book
about everything that I've learned and allthis stuff, but I'm not sure what
(16:53):
direction I want to take it.Then one of my TikTok friends, Rindy
goes, I got a great idea, you should collect women's stories who were
actually scammed. So I'm like,oh my god, that's a great idea.
So I did a video on thereabout it. So far, I've
gotten seven stories. I have otherladies I don't have a deadline. Yet
(17:17):
I have other ladies who were like, I'm working on it now. Some
are like afraid because they're afraid they'llget found by the scammer or something.
So I don't pressure that, andI always tell them give me a fake
name, don't use your real name, and just kind of let me know
what country am, because this isworldwide. I have ladies on Australia and
(17:37):
Germany and United Kingdom and Finland.I have one lady from Finland who set
me her story and it was hardto because her English wasn't good. So
I'm like trying to. That's whatI worked on last week when my wife
I was out. I was goingthrough the stories to do grammatic corrections and
punctuation and all that stuff, butwhich I will probably do like on Amazon,
(18:00):
you know, because I was goingto ask if you if you I
will volunteer to be the announcer ifyou need it. Hi, this is
you know, online dating with Patsy, the real stories, you know,
I really would. I would loveto do that, yeah, but I
just want to be a part ofit. What that's such a because it's
so important so well, you know, and again I've I've never I've always
(18:23):
wanted to talk with you for allthese years, especially I know I sent
you guys stuff all the time,yea and Christmas cards, and it just
so happened. I just went,I finally have time, which you know
I never usually do, and um, and this is and because of what
just happened, and I thought,you know what, And again I wasn't
(18:47):
scammed. Maybe emotionally, yeah,you know, but but again I think
that it's it's being together with womenthat have been through their men, mostly
women, and having each other's box. That's what my TikTok has turned into.
I mean, I get emails andquestions every day, you know.
Can you see what you can findout with this picture? I have the
(19:11):
reverse the app on my phone,and then the Advocating page did a video
on a place called the Dark Night, where it can search a picture even
better than the reverse the app canshow you pictures that probably is him,
could be him, the percentage ofif this is the guy or not.
And I have ladies on there.You know, I hold my sign up
(19:32):
for the web address. It's alsoon my blog, but I hold it
up and they're like, oh man, this is great, this is great.
I mean, I learned from them. Besides them, I get a
lot of messages. Gosh, Iwish I would have found you months ago.
I was scammed and and I tellevery one of them, just you
(19:52):
went through this. It's over.Don't beat yourself up about it. Move
on and show others and share you'velearned so that I don't fall for it
and you're awesome. Don't let ittear you apart. Don't let it get
you down. You know, Igo, You know, I always offer
everybody what's talk on the phone.I'll talk on the phone. I can't
get your money back, but Ican be your biggest cheerleader. I can
(20:15):
make you laugh, and I canremind you what a phenomenal person you are.
And I think sometimes because that's whothey hit. These cameras hit the
vulnerable women, the widows, theone who looks like they couldn't get a
man. I always laugh because I'mthinking, dude, if you think I'm
lonely, you do not know me. I know, but I play.
(20:37):
I play the lonely lady, youknow when I'm talking to them. But
I mean, I've just met somany phenomenal women on TikTok who are nice
enough to share their stories with me, and I do it about three nights
a week. I couldn't last weekbecause my wife I was down. And
when the one night Thursday, Idid a video on my phone. I
said, look, I haven't beenon because my wife I's down. I'll
(20:59):
be back. And I got backon Friday and people were like, we
missed because it was the previous weekendsince I went on, and they were
like, we missed you. Wethought something happened. Oh that's I'm like,
I better do the tell them aboutmy WiFi, and I will be
back Friday night. You know,I love this. I love well,
I'll be on there Friday, Fridaynight. What time I know it's a
central time. Well this was least. Oh, I'll let you know.
It was last Friday when I wasable to get buck on. Actually after
(21:23):
tonight I'm gonna do a live.Um. But it's I'm like I said,
I learned stuff from everybody else andI you know, I just share
everything I know and I the everybodyis just so nice on there, and
um, I just made so manywonderful friends. Um. I get,
like I said, I get lotsof messages now and sometimes I feel bad
(21:44):
because somebody will post during the livedid you check my pictures that I sent
you? And I'm like, I'mtrying. I just can't keep up with
them sometimes, but people be patientand yeah. Yeah, and maybe if
that group, if we can startthat Facebook group or something, then that
another way to share. Um.I don't know the legalities of it.
I don't know if you can ornot. I mean, can you I
(22:04):
don't. You can make it,Yeah, you can make it a private
group. Um, you know byinvitation. I belong to a Star Trek
fan group with a bunch of ladiesI've known for years. And it's Oh
that was the other reason, bythe way, that was the other reason
I had to contact you. I'ma total Um, I'm a total sci
fi nerd. Oh my god.If I am fantasy nerd and a gamer,
So what what's that? Yeah?Did you watch Piccard Season three?
(22:27):
I have not. Okay, II think I stopped all these I stopped
all these like prescription or subscriptions perspectivesthose I haven't said. Subscription I got.
I got rid of all my moviechannels so I could keep all my
Yeah, I'm just kind of likepicking and choosing I'll do one for three
months because I have ce a show. But so yeah, um, but
(22:48):
yeah, that was the other reason. Anyway, I didn't mean dire.
I just thought a fellow sci fifantasy gamer nerd oh I do is my
game? But I can't find iton Steam because my CDs don't work on
Windows ten. So oh well yeahWindows ten gotta love that. Yeah,
yeah, yeah, so it wasone of them. So are there,
(23:10):
um, of all of the sites, what do you think which ones besides
oh, I mean obviously, okay, Cupid's pretty bad, a plenty of
fish. I mean when I saybad, I don't want to get in
trouble for Hey, sorry guys,you're not advertising with me though, So
but which ones are the ones thatyou think? You think? Instagram?
Uh? Yeah, Instagram is uh, well, of course I'm talking about
(23:33):
Yeah. Um, let me tellyou a story. There's tons of fake
celebrities that have contacted me. Um. I'm a huge Chris Evens fan,
and I have had so many fakeChris Evens content I don't know, says
stupid? How do they like?Why would people think that you're gonna fall
for that? Um? It's Imean, I've had Chris Evans, Chris
Chris Pratt wanted a forty dollars iTunescard. I'm like, really, you're
(23:56):
regarding the Galaxy dude, right,Um, you know Chris Evant, the
fake Chris Evan. Actually now Idon't even play with it anymore because I
posted enough of his stories. Butit's just all this stuff he says,
and they want to get you,like you need a fan card to meet
me, and it's twenty five hundreddollars, you know. And I played
along. I'm like, oh sure. And then I have scammer signs that
(24:19):
I made, say, Hi,scammer, how's Nigeria? Another one is
um Franken for from Rocky Horror andit says, uh, you got caught?
How about that? Because I wasspeaking of Sweet trans Festade, I
think it was so but uh butno, it's it's I have all kinds
(24:41):
of fun things I do with theseguys. I really mess with them.
Um, I play along, youknow, Like I said, if you
read my blog, please know thatthat's not really Patsy talking. That's Suzanne.
I will play the game and thenI come in for the takedown.
If someone told me the one timethat they like my takedown, you know,
and that's your alter Susanne's your alterego. Yes, because like when
(25:04):
I'm on my TikTok and I'll say, well, Susanne's account, But then
I feel like every time I haveto explain for those of you who don't
know who Susanne is, She's me, but that's who I go by,
you know, and um. Andthen I have like all my audio conversations
on YouTube, but they're also onmy blog, and then I upload one
(25:25):
every couple of days on TikTok becauseI do voices and bad accents. But
so many of the ladies are like, oh no, we love it.
We think it's great. You know, it's obtaining and informative all at once.
Yes. The other night, oneof the gals goes, well,
you need to do an Irish one, and I said, well, you
know, I did an Irish oneone time, but then at that moment
(25:48):
I couldn't pull it out. I'mlike, I can't remember my mom It
was a way a little lassie Willie. I love your little pig hair,
right, could you give me threethousand dollars? Well, I kept thinking
of the Irish Brett soap commercial.I just think of Pink Cartello, Moon
Green Clovers. Yes, every singletibe. Oh my gosh. I mean,
(26:11):
I guess I've gotten lucky as faras not m being scammed, like
not that I would allow myself tobe scammed by money. Only one time
there was a guy that I wastalking to, um, and he was
from Texas, and he kept sayinghe was going to come out, and
then I finally just ended it becauseI'm like, you're married whatever. I
(26:33):
don't believe anything. This xed himout. Too good to be true.
Yeah, Well, the grammar andthe way they write to you. Um,
it's horrible. If I was anEnglish teacher, I think I'd be
pulling my hair out or teaching themhow to talk right. Um. The
other thing is the sweet talk.I do a thing on my podcast and
I did some on short TikTok videosearlier in the year before I did the
(26:59):
others. It's called scammer sweet talk, And I play soft music in the
background, romantic music, and Iread And I'm telling you, when I
read these, I am reading themfor word to word, and sometimes they
don't make sense, Oh my god, because they don't know how to because
they're from somewhere else they're in thenyou know, close somewhere other country or
something, and they're trying to speakEnglish and wow, oh but some of
(27:22):
it is hilarious. That's the otherthing I want to do is I want
to pull the screenshots of all thescammer sweet talk and put it all like
a little in a little thing andwe like in the back of your book
or something. That's a good idea, but for the for the printed book,
I would definitely do. That'd beawesome. Yeah. Yeah, So
(27:44):
there's a lot of stuff for peopleto go through online dating with Patsy dot
com. There's, um, obviouslyyou've got the YouTube channel, the podcast,
You've got the TikTok and and Ithink that, um, you're creating
this community. Um and and maybeone day the scammers will be gone.
I doubt it. Wouldn't that belovely? The one of the gals last
(28:07):
week asked, you think this willever stop? And not as long as
social media is around, you know, And I don't want it to go
away because I use it for alot of stuff. But you know,
I just tell everybody, you gotto be cautious out there. You know,
what are the first what is thelike if let's say, okay,
I'm gonna go back on forget hand, I'm not doing that one. Um,
and I decide I'm gonna go onI don't know whatever site. And
(28:32):
what would be the things that youwould say, Okay, this is what
you need to do, Judy.Well, the first thing is if they
send you a message and they knowI mean, like, what do I
post like as my like? First, let's start with a profile. What
would you put on? Oh,well, my account. I do have
an account on plenty of Fish,but I use my pictures, but it's
under Suzanne. But that in there, I list all the stuff I actually
(28:52):
do like like I like sports,I like movies, music, theater.
I'm trying to think what I haveon there. But then you know,
the one description which I thought wasreally cool was I put in there.
Um, Now, I have friendsthat I like to hang out with,
and I know you will have friendsthat you hang out with. I'm not
going to be jealous your friends whenyou need a boy's night out, and
(29:15):
I don't want you to be jealouswhen I need a girl's night out.
I just thought, not that I'mlooking, but I just thought that would
be something to say. Hey,look, I'm not glued to you.
You're not glued to me. Idon't like to be smothered. And uh,
you know, I like my time, you know. So I mean,
if you're doing a legitimate profile,just be honest. I state in
(29:40):
mind, I'm a liberal, youknow. You know, I'm like,
that's me, you know. ButI don't really talk politics with anybody,
you know. But you're not goingto change me, and I'm not going
to change you, you know.But I mean, I just I'm very
honest and I want to say blunt. That might be too harsh of a
word, but just no, youhave to be honest and and and you
(30:00):
know what, I um, oneof the things hype, I was very
very like, I changed my sunputs on one thing and I go,
oh, come on, and Iput on there. If you're an effing
dot dot dot scammer, you willbe you know, and I said,
I will definitely report you. Um, I go, I use kseenet um.
If you're not serious about really meetingsomeone, if you're full of crap,
(30:22):
do not contact me, you know. I mean, I really was
in bold and um. This oneguy went out with him a couple of
times. He was okay, butum he he actually said to me,
look, I if have you lookedme up on k Senet yet? And
I said not yet, but Iwas about to, because you will see
I had a DUI I ten yearsago. You know I've quit drinking ten
(30:44):
years ago. I gave the guya chance. He was honest. Um,
we just didn't get along that good, you know, but but that
happens. But I was actually reallyimpressed that he said that, and like
how many guys would say that?So, um, yeah, I think
you're right honesty. And and nowokay, so now you've got your profile
out. Um. And the onething I will say about Hinge that I
(31:07):
did like was that they couldn't pickyou. You had to pick them first.
I think that's how Bumble is too. Is that one where I didn't
have. Yeah, I didn't haveBumble didn't do me well at all.
So we stories there were scammers onthere too, everywhere everywhere. Um so
now okay, now you you youlike somebody, Now what are some of
(31:30):
the just I know it's sweet talk, but what are other some little red
flags maybe somebody would not know.I notice on plenty of fish and amatch
dot com you know, I putI'm from Saint Louis. I want somebody
from Saint Louis hall put that inyour profile. Yeah, yeah, I'll
get all these guys, well,oh, I'm in the military, and
(31:52):
oh I'm from Saint Louis. Oh, well, what part of Saint Luis
did you grow up in? Youknow? I lie and say, oh,
I'm I'm in Le dou where youyou know? And they can't always
that are the famous Saint Louis questionhigh school? Yeah, and I had
one guy, Well, I didn'tgo to high school there. I went
to high school in New York.Okay, whatever. Um let me think.
(32:12):
I noticed on Hinge a lot ofpilots. I don't. I'm like,
why pilots? Yeah yeah, reallysome of the ones that um like
story scammera use I'll run through thesereal quick. Oil rig workers. They'll
say they're on oil. They'll evenpost pictures being on the oil rig.
I don't know if they're from wherethey found them, right, Yeah,
(32:34):
deployed military, which we all know, fake celebrities, Oh yeah, doctors,
United Nations employees, and any professionwith the reason to travel. So
well, like you said, whenyou get a message from somebody. First
off, if it's a term ofendearment to me, that's a red flag
because I none of the guys Iknow is gonna send a note to a
lady that they don't know, Hi, pretty, Hi beautiful. It'll be
(32:59):
more like a hey or something likethat. You know. Um. Then
of course, look at the waythey type the grammar. Although I am
guilty because I use the voice recognitiona lot and I don't always proof freed
it. And my response is back, sometimes are like I could be a
scammer because none makes sense. SoI have got to learn. I'm learning
(33:23):
getting better at it of proofing itbefore I send it. Um. What
I mean, if if they don'twant to talk to you on the phone
right away or meet right away,what's the point of stringing your how I
am? I had that. Yeah, I'm the same way. And I
even said that in my bio.I said, Look, you know I
didn't say what I did. Ididn't because you know, the minute you
(33:45):
say that, oh great, youknow they're gonna listen or whatever. Um.
And and no, I said,I said, I don't want to
chit chat on here. Let's justyou know, talk or meet somewhere for
coffee. We know right away boomright um. Interestingly enough, another side
of it was I met a gentleman, very nice guy, and he did
(34:06):
want to go on a second date, but I wasn't interested in you.
But he was very nice and hewas so freaked out because I was late
and we were meeting it somewhere andI was really late. I kept,
you know, I'm using my burnerapp, which is really hard to text
from, and um, and he'sgoing, you know, he was starting
to yet like he When I finallygot there, he goes, I was
because I said, can you justcome out? I can't find parking and
(34:29):
he didn't want to come out andI couldn't understand. I want a jerk.
When I finally got in, hegoes, how do I know there
wasn't some guy who was going tobeat me up? And I go,
wow, I guess so like hewas smart? Yeah, yeah, you
know, because he goes, whatyou're sitting there saying you can't find it?
I go, look, it's raining, my hair's getting all gross.
It was funny, but it doesgo both ways, and he said he
(34:52):
goes, well, he goes,you know you're you're you know on te
and you're this and then you know, yeah, so I don't. I
don't have a burner phone, butI have an app number that I use,
which is like yeah, and it'sfree. And so whenever these guys
you know, give me your number, well, I'm not going to give
you my real number. I giveyou this one because if you punch it
(35:14):
in to try to find it,you're not going to find anything, you
know, because it's that you know. So. But most of those,
the one thing I will tell youdating sites and other social media once they
want to take you off that platformto like Google Chat or What's app,
that's another red flag because yeah,WhatsApp, that's another one. I don't
(35:36):
join that one because it won't acceptmy app number and I'm sure it's heck
not going to put in my realnumber. But that's just another platform.
There's also Telegram and Wisdom I think, and a couple others I can't remember.
But you don't want to move offof there because um the one video
that I did a duet on TikToktalks about this and basically I guess they
(35:58):
can't be tracked over there, butif they you keep on the main like
Instagram or Twitter. Then I guessthey can be monitored or whatever. But
oh, that's a great tip,Patsy. But yeah, don't ever leave
the social If they say, oh, well, let's go over to Google
Chat and talk, No, I'llstay here. And that's what I do.
I tell them, oh, no, I'll stay here. Oh though
(36:20):
sometimes I do go over to GoogleChat. But most of the time I
will be like, no, let'sstay here. Are like when I try
to video chat them, I nevershow myself. When they are insistent that
I show myself, I put onmy Jason mask. You'll see it in
my videos that I But most ofthe time I have my phone face in
(36:43):
the ceiling so they can't see me, and it will chat and I record
it on my computer. I havea microphone I set up by my phone
so that it'll pick up everything theysay. And but yeah, and then
I've got like noisemakers and toys andother stuff. But I mean I will
talk to them and on the rorcasianthat they will show themselves. I'm able
to scamp a picture, so Ido have pictures of actual scammers on my
(37:05):
blog. Wow, that's another thingI show on TikTok. I'm like,
hey, who wants to see thescammers? You know? Yeah, show
them? Or are we have oneswe call frequent flyers. Somebody came up
with that name for me on there. I used to call them repeaters.
These are guys whose pictures have beenused on me over and over and over,
but a different name every time.Wow. So um, they're the
(37:28):
same ones that are the telemarketers.I'm telling you, I think really believed.
Well, I just learned something lastweek and this is hilarious. How
I found it. I was bingingon The Good Wife on Paramount and the
one episode somebody was being scammed andthey talked about the Sucker List, and
so I went out and googled SuckerList. And basically, it's like any
(37:52):
other company who would sell your informationso they can send you junk mail.
It's the Sucker List is shared amongstother scammers and other things like that.
Now, I haven't done enough researchto see if I could find the Sucker
List. One of the last Hattieget off of it and then yeah,
now there's been like CBS did thestory CN and that was two that I
(38:13):
saw, But I haven't had achance to go and actually research it more.
But google sucker list and see whatyou find out. Let me know.
And by the way, you know, Patsy is doing this while she
has another full time job, solet's try in to support her so that
this can be her full time jobbecause we need. Yeah, I'm sick,
(38:34):
really, but I can't retire yetbecause I can't afford to. I
you know what, we all alot of us are in boats very similar,
you know, or we just haveto work. I like my job.
I like my job. I'm actuallyhome three days a week and two
days in the office, so ifthat works out well, you know.
But like when I'm at home,I work till three, and it's like
as soon as I get off work, unplugged the laptop, I'm automatically on
(38:59):
doing this about five ten after three. Wow. Yeah, it's a lot.
It's a lot. And again,I love your passion and I love
how just you're very very um Whatis the word I don't want to I
don't think it's pass I don't thinkit's enthusiastic. But what I say persistent,
and I mean that in a sucha positive way. There was a
(39:21):
word I was using and I canremember it on my head because I thought,
gosh, this is how you know, this is how successful people they
work, and I continue to workand you do. Because I was interviewed
twice by Channel five the last sixyears. The last one was um in
November of twenty twenty p J.Randallwark. They came to my house and
(39:45):
we did it outside because of COVIDand stuff. Right, wonderful woman,
absolutely wonderful, nice woman. She'sthe one who I was talking with her
and I said, I really I'vebeen taking podcast classes through the Saint Louis
Library on line and by the way, check out your library. They got
so many awesome classes. Yeah,it was free and it was like an
(40:07):
hour a month, you know,and they hit on different topics and I
was telling her, you know,I really want to start a podcast about
this, and she was just like, you have to, you must.
So she was a big supporter.We exchanged a couple emails. I did
a practice podcast and put it outon my Google Drive and gave her access
and then she gave me some greattips and then she took a job in
(40:28):
Seattle. But she was a bigsupporter and I'm forever grateful to her and
Pat McConnell was my first interviews.He's wonderful. What a great family he
has too. Yes, Yeah,we talked about our family and stuff before
(40:50):
the interview and after. So he'sa good guy. He's tb he's to
do reports from when I was overat the other station. Yeah, So,
I mean, I'm always sending stuffout emailing. Um, let me
ask you this question, Judy.I trust your your your advice. You
know, I email all this stuffout and maybe I should do this.
(41:10):
I'm not shire or anything, butdo I dare and say, hey,
I would really love to be onyour morning show. I think I have
something important to say that. Well, I mean, I don't want to
be too aggressive, even though Iknow I think that you should. You
have to do that because no one'sdoing it for you. We don't.
You know, you don't have anagent, you don't have so guests you
should and you can't. You emailedme the message me this morning. I
(41:34):
gotta tell you, I just aboutdied. I was texting everybody. Oh
unless you contacted me. Well,see, here's the great thing. By
doing this, you're gonna I'm gonnabe able to get you on there.
And it's gonna live longer because Iget to put it on the podcast.
I gotta put it on a socialismmy YouTube and all is and then um
and use some of it. Youknow, I do believe you have a
recording on your end. If youwant to use any on TikTok, go
(41:57):
for it. Oh, I will. And I'm I mean when I am
a guest on somebody's podcast, Ishare it everywhere too because I want people
to I'll be talking about it onTikTok later tonight. So give me hey,
and and and what if they whatif they say something like there,
because some of those scammers can reallylook into you and find out about you,
which is good name is for me, it's really scary, ye like
(42:22):
really scary. Um. And andif they listen to the show, they
know what I'm into and they'll say, hey, I'm a Libra. We're
supposed to get along. I meanthat's kind of the sweet talk you talk
about, right yeah? Yeah?And really, on the other social media
apps, my identity is pretty hidden. Um, But on TikTok, I
(42:44):
can't hide it because I'm trying toactually reach the people that need to know
all this information. And that's whatthe whole thing is it's getting out there
educating women and men. The otherstory, UM, which is heartbreaking,
and I've heard this from many,it's when someone is involved in an online
scam and they're talking to this guy. They don't want to believe it when
(43:07):
you tell them they're a scammer.It's very difficult. I get a message
once in a while. I hada lady from church emailed me a couple
of years ago, and you know, I said, well, this is
what should tell her. UM,I am happy to talk to her if
you need be. I have donethat twice. M. But that's the
hard part is convincing them because youknow, then they feel dumb, and
(43:29):
then they feel stupid, and it'slike, don't feel that way. And
it's easier for me to say thatbecause I've never been scammed. But I
can just you know, I cansit and listen and I can remind you
that you're gonna be okay and you'reawesome and you know. But that's that's
another problem we run into. It'slike, okay, how do you get
them to stop? You know,well, it's the same as if some
(43:50):
your husband or wife is cheating onyou and your best friends and you're like,
uh yeah, and you find outwell they were sample. Yeah,
same thing. It's just getting theword out there. And um, you
know, I give out free Tshirts that advertise my blog and podcast.
I saw the hair band I sell. Yes, I love I love that
(44:12):
stuff. But if you love swag, um yeah. I have a cricket
machine and I bought it specifically todo my T shirts and stuff and hats.
And then I started making other sweatshirtsand selling those last year, especially
in October and December, because Ihad some really cool Halloween sweatshirts and Christmas
sweatshirts. But you're gonna be goodif we could get some made. And
(44:35):
then eventually you get big enough wherethe women take pictures of themselves for these
sites and it says I don't getscam thanks to online dating with Patsy or
something like that. I'm stealing that, don't scam me. I follow online,
you know, and and then yourpictures and it's right there in your
picture. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I always generate ideas you can have
(44:55):
it. I love it. Well. Like I said the book, I
someone really took it into a differentdirection for me, and that night,
I don't think I could sleep.I was so excited. I think this
is great and I hope this isn'tthe last I talk to you. Obviously
we'll do it again. And umand yeah follow so TikTok, YouTube everywhere.
(45:21):
It's all online dating with Patsy dotcom. And she needs your story.
You got a good scammer story.Yeah, we all need to share
these. And you don't have touse your real name. You can make
up a name I've had. Itold them all make up names I do
want. You don't have to tellme what state, trimp if you're from
the United States or wherever, justso people can get an idea. It's
not just us, it's all overthe world, you know. So so
(45:44):
yeah for TikTok, which is mybig one, it's just online dating with
Patsy Okay, I oh, ifI follow you, If not, I
will you must I will definitely ladAnd then yeah, and the Twitter and
Instagram are the same. It's Patsyonline date. And again all this is
on my blog. You can findall that information of where to find me,
(46:06):
how to contact me. I havemy email out there, I have
a contact form. Um, youknow, it's all there. And again
I'm so you're inspiring to me thatyou do this really just just too out
of love. You know, youdo this from the kindness of your heart,
and I really just want to tellyou thank you for keeping doing it.
(46:29):
It really means a lot I get. I get a lot of that,
and I just like, oh,you know, I this started out
as a hobby. Um. I'ma big fan of the movie Julia and
Julia, and that's where my inspirationto start a blog. Julia. Julie
Powell died last fall and what shethinks she had a hearttech but she was
also sick with COVID And when Isaw that, I bust into tears because,
(46:52):
oh, you know, if you'veseen the movie, she was so
in awe of Julia child right,I was so in of Julie Powell,
you know. So it's like whenshe died, it was like, I'm
not going to get to meet it. I did send her husband because I
found their address. I'm good atfinding stuff. I did send him a
sippy card. Now I never expectedto hear back, but I wrote him
(47:13):
telling him who I am. Iwas a big fan. I she was
my inspiration to start a blog.And so when she passed away. I
was really sad. You know,I got over it, but yeah,
you know, it was just thatfirst night, it was just like what,
you know, it's crazy, she'sso young. I don't sorties.
I think, yeah, yeah,yeah, wow. Well you know what,
(47:37):
I love what you like. Isaid, I love what you're doing.
And uh, I can't wait tosee you again. I love your
pink hair. Thank you. We'llsee. I'm also the one lady who's
kind of gives me a lot ofadvice on some of the stuff on TikTok,
and she's like, you need likea catch thing, like the Pink
Lady says, So I'm trying tothrow that in there, you know,
(47:58):
the Pink Lady. You know.So I love it. Anybody any ideas,
you know, throw it out there. The Pink Lady says what he
says. So, I mean,you're you know, this is evolving into
and I really do believe that ourlifetimes that we pick our little bodies to
be in big bodies, whatever bodieswe are, the soul, it kind
of what we're supposed to do.If you're doing what you're passionate about,
(48:20):
you're supposed to be doing that.It finds you, and I think it
found you and you're just really sharingthis with people and it's an important thing
to share. Yeah, thank okay, thank you, thank you. Hey,
well, I'm excited and I can'twait to talk to you again.
Patsy and I always end everything withNAMA, stay well. Thank you,
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