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October 13, 2022 49 mins

In the season 4 premiere of Let’s Be Real, Sammy Jaye sits down with singer-songwriter Ashe and has a very down to earth, unfiltered conversation as they discuss everything from Ashe’s biggest life lessons, hardships she’s overcome, the truth about relationships and breakups, her new album Rae and so much more!

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Speaker 1 (00:01):
Hey everyone, and welcome to the first episode of season
four of Let's Be Real. That is Crazy. I am
so excited to share my conversation with singer songwriter Ash,
but before I do, I don't think I've truly had
the opportunity to share and express my gratitude to you
guys for listening and just being interested in this podcast.

Season four is absolutely my favorite, and there are so
many full circle moments that I cannot wait to share
with you. But for now, let's kick it off with
my new favorite artists Ash. Hello, everybody, and welcome to
this week's episode of the Let's Be Real podcast. This
week is so exciting because I get to talk with
one of my favorite musicians. Ash. Welcome. That's so nice.

This is your first podcast. Yeah, this is so exciting. Wow.
I also I already said this earlier, but wow, I
love the way I sound. It's microphone with the headphone.
It makes me want to talk really low. Oh, it's
like you just want to like do a whole meditation.
You could do like a narration. I was like, your

is so soothing. It's soothing in person, but then when
you're talking anyways, that's so funny you say that because
I don't like the sound of my voice. Really yeah,
even right now talking it's fine. It's just listening to
it back, I'm like, oh, I like it a lot.
It's thank you so much. Welcome. Just kick this off

with compliments, you know what. I think that's the best
way to start off any podcast. It was a little
self love on my part two. I was like, I
sound good, just to you know, shoot your own horn
a little more. I've been listening to Ray NonStop. Can
I tell you that I think the not only the
lyrics and the storytelling, but the instrumentals and the music.

It just hits different. Thank you, It truly does. And
I'm so excited to talk to you about it and
what everything that's happening. The first thing I want to
talk about is, I know you've talked about how you're
making an album. It's kind of a snapshot of a
moment in time in your life. Where were you in
your life when this album was made. What's funny because
it is the perfect snapshot of where I currently am.

But when I was writing it, it was kind of
like I was manifesting this current era. Weirdly love that
it was a manifestation yeah, because I was still in
a pretty like long term committed relationship at the time.
I was still wearing my turtlenecks. Like when I was
working on this album, I was kind of like wanting

to be and like graduate into this new era, but
I wasn't there yet, and I like, weirdly making the
album kind of launched me into this place because like
I can be the girl on another man's jeans, and
then I broke up with my boyfriend and then I'm
in somebody else's chains. How you are you should be?
I was like, wait, but when I wrote that song,
not in my wildest dreams did I think I'd be

here now. Isn't that funny how life works like that.
It's just I'm a warrior and sometimes something I'm realizing.
It's kind of it all it works out, it kind
of does. Oh yeah, if you're a warrior, I would
say stop. I mean, hey, listen, I feel like we
all have like in inordinate amount of anxiety, and especially

your generation and like below us. It's just there's a
lot going on. But I will say, you're gonna waste
away your life worrying. Oh yeah, don't do it. I
just gotta let it go, because things are going to
be the way they are whether or not you like it. Like,
do you know what this kind of reminds me of

maybe a song called Emotional. Yeah, she did her homework,
she listened to the whole thing, of course. Yeah, we
do emotional honestly though, Like I love that song and
it's the energy of it is like, let's just have
a good time tonight. But also I am a firm

believer that like, let yourself feel all the things, you know,
let yourself go there. Sometimes. I think one of the
things that I think that you know you can relate
to is being a woman is really hard. And that's
just a blanket, just a blanket statement, I know, and
I've been realizing it more and more, especially going into

school and just being on my own and just the
pressures that come with it and how we're you know,
it's almost like we're not meant to be like human
beings in a way. We're kind of looked at and
it's hard to it's it's it's just it's really hard sometimes.
And I know you've talked about these themes and your
songs and your music, and I was wondering where that

stems from and if you've dealt with it personally as well.
Oh my gosh, yeah, I like what you just said.
I feel like you kind of hit the nail on
the head with like it's almost like we're not supposed
to be human beings. Sometimes, like the expect some of
the expectations on us are like just so out of
this world, like be beautiful, but don't be too manufactured

because that's fake. But if you're too natural, and then
like work out and be fit, but like don't be
too thin, don't be too thin. There's so many there's
like all these double standards are like I just started
seeing this guy and like all these things are coming
up for me. Of like it's fine if like he like, okay,
this is so dumb, but like parts in front of me,

but I'm like I could never because I mean there's
a whole there's a lot of other stuff around there.
But like I'm even being just like anybody else. And
I definitely I think we're we're programmed to be like
you have to be perfect in every way, and when
the standard of perfection changes, then you have to change

with it. And you better you better know when it
changes because sometimes it changes overnight and you miss it.
But I totally relate to you. And I think that
I surround myself with a lot of really good humans
that see me as a human, like men and women
alike in my life and and everyone in between, that

I I have been really well protected. Now, like I
got to a place in my life where I don't
have anybody in my life who doesn't expect me to
like be real, you know, yeah actually on words got him?
But yeah, what's going on right now in school? How
is that? How is that reflecting in school? Like what's

coming up of like, you know, not feeling like you
can be a human. It's very interesting because being in
film school, I'm realizing already there is not only is
like the film industry very male dominated, but I already
had experience where I was directing a scene and a
guy completely was like in my face trying to distract
me and tell me I was doing it wrong? What?

And I'm like that was freshman year already. I'm like,
why can't It feels like sometimes the voice that we're
given isn't enough or it's not taken seriously enough. So
I think something that I'm really trying to do and
established for myself is make my what I want clear
and because frankly, no one else is going to do
it unless I do it. Yeah, you're you have to

care more than anyone else. Oh absolutely. Also I love this.
My mom always told me that you teach people how
to treat you, so like it puts the ownership back
into your court of Like, yeah, people can kind of
out the gate, maybe treat you poorly, but then you
immediately either validate them and say that's okay, or you

stand up for yourself and you're like, well that's not
gonna fly. And you're constantly everything you do, from the
moment you walk up to someone and hug them or
shake their hand, you are teaching people constantly how to
treat you. And so I feel like in that scenario,
it's like this person is violating your personal space, your

he's obviously being super disrespectful, and like, in that moment,
that sucks, but you know, we learn from it and
we grow from it. And because that's all you can
do from it, I feel like sometimes you just have
to be like I feel like no, no, and I
feel like something you mentioned about being in this new era,
I'm kind of in a new era myself kind of

just like, Okay, we're twenty now, it's a new decade.
Oh my gosh, we're just it's it's a new decade,
and I'm very excited for what's to come and for
everything that I'm gonna learn. How how have your twenties been?
Giving any advice? God, yeah, I got some advice for you. Um,
My twenties have been interesting. I've always felt like, even

through a bit, I've been through a lot. My twenties
were I got engaged, I got married, I got divorced,
I said another relationship. I graduated college, moved to Nashville,
moved to San Diego, and moved to l A. M hmm,
moved around and bought a house, got that divorce. I
had to sell that house, give half of my money

to somebody else who did not deserve it, and then
piping hot tea, um, um, divorce is messy. Oh yeah
at such a young age, Yeah I was. I was
twenty five, plenty of time to go through it all.

You're gonna love it. Um. So that was interesting. And
then I got into a very safe, lovely, kind relationship
with someone who just became my best friend and then
got to a point where I realized I was in
a friendship, not not like a romantic relationship. It's a
fine line, but the line it's very it's it's it.

I needed it, like it was perfect for the time.
It was right for as long as it was right,
like it was. I also was in a really like
emotionally abusive relationship in my marriage, and so like needing
to be with someone who was really safe and kind,
I think was exactly what I needed, and he taught
me a lot of like, Okay, these are non negotiables

moving forward in relationships. Here's what I know that I
want um, and knowing what you don't want is also
just important to oh my gosh, Yeah, relationships are great,
Like I feel like they get a bad rap. It's
all the breakup albums that give them the bad rap.
It's all the breakup albums that's all everyone listens to,
or the divorce records. Yeah, I mean, hey, it's just

which is they're great songs, but like, yeah, there's just
some lessons that you don't learn through other people, like
you have to learn them on your own and like
go through a relationship. But anyways, what was my advice
to you in your twenties. Wait, um, what do you
wish you knew going into this the decade? I do

feel like a little bit on the emotional lane. I
do feel like I took things far too seriously in
my twenties. I take things way less serious. And my
twenties are almost over. Like I I'm getting to that
point where I'm like, I think people take life, just

make things that aren't important way too important, and then
they take over your life and then you're losing sleep
over these things or over people who don't you don't
even like. You're trying to get approval from people you
don't even care about. Then they don't care about you either.
It's for this abstract concept of approve. You want them

to care about you. You want them to care. But also,
like in your twenties, in your twenties, something that I'm
trying to figure out is being content with myself and
just needing myself. And I feel like that's like the
journey that I'm currently on right now. That's amazing. Yeah.
I went to the summer. I was the summer was
all about self growth. I went to Europe by myself.
I was just wanted to see if I could do it,

So that's bold. Where'd you go in Europe? I went
to Paris for a week by myself. It's my favorite city.
It was so pretty. The thing was, I was so
anxious the first couple days. I couldn't enjoy the food.
Oh no, doesn't that suck? Like well, I mean, but
we got to enjoy Paris. So after the first three
days you chilled out. After my body was like, no,

are you learning it? No, you were there. I was
just going listening to music and Apple maps. That was
how I got good. Okay, not talking to any French people, No,
I did. Look, it was great for people watching. It
was so good for people watching. How did you order food?
You know? There was a they gave me English menus

what in Paris? Yeah? Or and if it wasn't, I
would just like like go on Google Translate and then
see what it said. Oh like the scanny that's genius. Yeah,
honoring technology. Man. I'm so proud of you. I don't
know that I wouldn't know you well enough to be
proud of you, but I do feel pride that you
went on your own and it's been a week there.

That's amazing. I feel like after living through a pandemic.
I'm like, you gotta get out of here. You just
got to get out and explore the world at this point. Yeah. Yeah,
And I love that this has been the summer of
self growth for you. I think it is. I mean
I don't know. That feels like the energy a lot
around a lot of people. I know right now, what
about you? Oh? I mean always I went on this

like fifty four show headline tour. Incredible, that's certain, April
and it just kicked my ass. It was amazing and
I I only got to like connect with all these
fans that like I've just been like we were dating,
were dating each other on Tinder, like it's an online relationship.
We got to have in person. Yeah, we finally got

to like not fully like hug everyone because I'm on stage,
but like just like connect in a real way. Why
did I say that? Oh growth? Yeah. That tour completely
changed my basically my entire existence, like the view I
had of myself, like seeing myself through my fans eyes.

In the beginning, I had a really hard time with it.
I like went through a whole existential crisis in the
first two weeks a tour because I was like, no
one deserves to be loved like this, Like I remember
kind I've gotten over it, and now I'm like love me,
love me and more love me, or like let okay,

well we'll get there. But I was like I'd walk
out onto stage and like the intro, I have this
crazy elaborate intro, and then I walk out in the
music cuts and like it's like a wall of screaming
hits me. And I had a really hard time adjusting
to that. It was the first time I had ever

experienced it. And while like your whole life, you like,
I want to be successful, I want to be in
a room where people are screaming my name, and then
it actually happens, and then you're like, how do I process?
No one should feel this way, like putting me on
a pedestal, Like I'm I'm a human being, You're like,
and then you're putting another category of not only on
my woman that isn't supposed to be a human being,

but I'm also an artist, which is a whole other
there's a whole side, another bag of expectations, like and listen,
this isn't a what was me? I love my life?
And I got to a point where I got to like, oh, okay,
but the beginning was really hard. It's a transition, just
like anything, it's changed, yeah, and I was really feeling
the growing pains of that. And then I realized the

big realized nation was people are going to fall in
love with the version of you they have in their head.
So and even like our closest our parents are the
person you fall in love with, it's they're falling in
love with a version of you that they've created, and like,
only you get to fully intimately know you. And so

what I stopped doing was making all of my fans
wrong for loving me, because I'm like you, I'm like
when you know yourself deeply, like stop it, stop it.
And then you get to a point where you like,
oh no, I'm gonna just let them love whoever they've
kind of made me out to be in their head,
and I'm going to be her for them tonight. And

suddenly I was able to like process everything so much
better because everyone views you in their own way, and
so it's it's it's is it a whole interesting concept,
but it's so true too. Yeah, even like your friends
are like if your friend met you prior to the
summer of growth, you know, would be a different person.

They might even be like now, they'd be like, well,
why are you acting this way? And you'd be like, well,
I'm evolving and I'm changing, and but they have a
version of you and they love and so like. I
find Actually that's why a lot of friendships, it's like
the best test of those friendships. It's like if you
can grow together instead of just stay stagnant or let
you grow and continue to like, let their love evolve

while you evolve. Just got deep. It's called let's be
real real. We're so real. Guys, were so quirky, were
so deep. Oh my god, we're so quirky quirky. I
don't even try, my god, I would never Okay, we
have to take a quick break. But when we come back,

so much more to talk about, from how the media
treats people in the spotlight, your new album raight, and
how you bounce back if things don't go your way.
We'll be right back and we're back. One of the
things that that's so interesting you bring up because one
of the main themes I wanted to discuss my podcast

is I feel like the media and society we put
these people on a pedestal and then we forget their
human beings, that that bleed that they're just human. And
I feel like something that I'm really trying to do
is let everyone know that, because sometimes when I see headlines,
I'm like, you're not treating them like a human being.
You're treating them like an object. And I feel like,

also when you see these tabloids, especially with people like
my age or stuff that are going through stuff, and
it's then they're covering and I'm like, but they're just
a teenager, And I feel like we should all be
more accepting of that. Everyone's just going through their own
thing and we should just all accept people as people. Yeah,
I mean, wouldn't that be nice? Wouldn't that be so nice?
That's an ideal where I think. I think part of

it like you really have to take responsibility on your
own end, because the world is not going to jump
onto that bandwagon. Like I mean, hey, you're going to
change like whoever is listening to this podcast, You're going
to change their lives and you're gonna impact them in
a you know, intimate and cool way. At some point

I had to go, I'm going to stop being mad
at the world all the time for doing what it
always does and and not say like, hey, it's okay
for you to treat me wrong or anything. Not say that.
And you you do advocate for yourself, and you do
stand up for you what you believe, and you do
make a podcast that creates change and impact. But at

some point I had to be like, I'm gonna stop
being mad at the world for like telling me that
getting older is ugly or that you can't be successful
as you get older as a woman, and like, yeah,
I hate that. Yeah I'm always going to hate that,
but so a waste of my time and energy. You
just gotta do what you gotta do to get by,

and you just gotta not listen to it and do
your own thing because that's all you can ever do
and try to like you, definitely, I definitely grew thicker
skin in my twenties, for sure. How do you not
from everything you've been through though it makes you the
person you are today? Are you grateful for all those
experiences and the person you've become today or do you

wish some of them didn't happen? Oh that's a good question.
Well mm hmm, Yeah, I mean I really love myself.
I really like who I am. I got there in
my twenties. That was a good thing. I hope you
are there or you get there. That's one of those

things like when you look in the mirror and you're like,
she's dope, you should like, what a waste of time
to think anything else, because you're stuck with you forever.
So wherever you go, there you are, you might as
well like her, you know. Um, But I so I
am this person that I like because of all the

things that I went through, So no, I probably wouldn't
have like asked for them. But like my brother died
two years ago in the middle of the pandemics, Like
there's so many other like so many things happen in
my twenty I'm like, now, I'm You're like giving me
a moment to have perspective over the last how many
of years of my life And I'm like, wow, down,

isn't that cool to see how far you've come and grown? Yeah,
it's really Yeah, I appreciate you for giving me a
moment out of my day to think you need to
acknowledge it. Absolutely you do. Thanks. This is good for me,
of course, because like we could we go through everything,
and like, if we don't appreciate and learn from it,

then the only way of failing is not getting back up.
That's the only way you fail. Quote. I love that absolutely.
The only way you're failing is if you don't get
back up. It's not if you fall you just get
back up. Oh no, because the fall is inevitable. No,
the fault like it's gonna happen. You might as well
embrace it, just like embrace the awkwardness. I've actually been

trying to this. I've been trying to live by two
things as a reason, which my friend told me, the
one percent rule, which is to do something that makes
yourself one percent better in one aspect of your life
every day. So it could be something small like going
to the gym or doing yoga or doing something that
helps move a goal forward. And then just being comfortable
with the uncomfortable. Ah so one thing. Yeah. The second

is to do one thing that makes you a little
bit uncomfortable. Okay, how's that been going? My goodness, it's
been so stressful. Actually, it's been making me so uncomfortable.
But the universe, I've never been more. I've never live
my life. I truly like I have just felt like
my stomach turning in and out this week, but it's
been so good because I feel like the universe has

been rewarding it. Can you give me a couple of
examples things that have made you uncomfortable? So I asked
three different people out to coffee. Okay, you don't know,
but it's at a coffee chop that's like has books
and it's very chill. So it's like, you know what,
I don't know these people. It's a good environment, so
we're going to do that. Or I last minute, I

like to go to bed early. My friends invited me
to go hang out with some friends, and I would
so like little things like that, we're saying hi to
people that I wouldn't normally say hi do, or going
up to someone and complimenting them, like little things. I
also feel like the rule too kind of plays into
Rule one. It's like, yeah, like you're making yourself one
percent better by like saying hi to someone you wouldn't

normally say hi to and being like gracious too. That's amazing.
I love this. I'm going to do this person because
when my friend told me that, I was like, we
can all do something one person to make us one
person better. That's just like even if I do nothing
all day, I can send an email that would or
draw something or do anything. I feel like it's like
one percent moving forward, moving forward in growth because I

feel like there is a big out of a stigma.
If like, if it's one percent better, then it's just
growing innately like saying maybe something's broken or something's wrong
with you, because I feel like we do have to
get out of the wrongness of ourselves, because we're constantly
like this about me is wrong, this about me is wrong.
I were so hard on ourselves. But I'm like, yeah,

I like the one percent, but I'd say maybe like
one percent growing ya, moving forward or something because you're
not broken, you don't need to make you're you're not sick,
you don't need to get better because you're perfect as
you are and wonderful. You know, I appreciate that. Yeah.
I've also been living my life in three months chunks,
so because I realized how much I change at the

end of like three months, like I'm like a different person.
Well seasons seasons. So I just planned my life in
three months and it helps so much. It makes things
less overwhelming, like a five year plan person. Because if
if the pandemic taught me anything is I can't control
a fucking thing. So I do it in three months. Yeah,
three feels much more realized, fels much more manageable. It's

a length of a semester. I'm just like, Okay, my
mind is a semester. I like that. Do you do
like chickens? Like before the three months start, do you
like journal? Here's where I'm at. And then at the end.
I've been trying to get into journaling. It's the thing is,
I have so many thoughts. I have so many thoughts.
By the time I have to write it all down,
my hand is so exhausted. I'm so smart, I have

so many words in my brain. I just can't stop writing.
Like it's just NonStop at the point. I know, but
I do video diaries sometimes. Oh that's cool, and it's
fun to look back on, like a year later, like,
oh my god, that poor girl. Look at her, that
poor thing, look at her. She done so much. She
didn't know. She didn't fall apart. The imagine you at

nine watching your twenty year old self, and I'm sure
you feel like grown. And I know I'm only at
the start. I know. I'm only at the start of
it too, girl, I'm only at the start. We're all
years ahead of you. We're j Loo said something about that.
She she was like, I feel like my life is
just beginning. And she's like fifty. She did just get

married again, I know, and she looks better than both
of us. Oh, she's so cool. She's the coolest. Oh
my gosh. Anyways, I don't know how we got to,
j Loo, but I don't know, but we got there,
and that's what's important to mention. That's what's important to
mention what we got there. But we got there, and
that was the whole point of the day. That was
the whole point of the day. Um. Something that I

really want to talk to you about is breakups because
I feel like I we have some viewers that are
going through it, and I think we need to talk
to them because I've got some messages some people and
some friends, and I know a lot of people that
listen to your music that you've really helped through their breakups.

And I was wondering what your biggest piece of advice
is in moving forward and not looking back. Oh my gosh,
it's a hefty one. I know, well, was someone who
recently went through a break up. M how recent like
four months ago. I'm sorry, that sucks. It's good. I'm

in love, Okay, cool, great, Yeah, yeah that was easy.
Um well that's another thing. You know what you want
as you get older, you just started just like I
know exactly what I want, what I don't want. Anyways,
that's not the point of this next thing. Um, advice
going through a break up, how to move forward? I
think that it's it's so relative to what the relationship was.

So for instance, my marriage was very toxic, very hurtful,
and unhealthy. So for me, a really good way of
moving forward was it actually helped me to remind myself,
like as I was leaving, I had to really give

my person, my self permission to leave, like I was
really stuck. It was also we were in like a
cycle of abuse and there was a lot else going
on there, but like I needed to give myself permission
to Like I would literally write down all the reasons
like after I left, like of why he was not
good for me and how I was mistreated, not to

focus on the negative, but to get myself out of
the romanticizing so sad. Yeah, oh that was so paint
like oh no, like, yeah, you start going like I
was validating the girl, like hack, yeah you left because
X y Z and you just wrote down all the

X about all the YU. Yeah, well yeah that was necessary.
But like, for instance, in this last relationship, there was
nothing wrong, And I think that's why there doesn't have
to be though too. It just could just doesn't always work.
It just wasn't right anymore. And we weren't meant to
be each other's romantic partners. It just wasn't how it

was supposed to be. And but moving on from that,
it was such a big What I found helpful was
like I did the opposite, Like I honored that relationship
by like remembering really sweet times and being like, oh,
I'm so grateful, Like I'm so grateful that I had
this person in my life in that way for as

long as I did. And instead of sitting in the
wrongness of the situation to break up how much it sucks,
you thank yourself for all the reasons why you know
you were in it for as long as you were.
I mean, those are again, I say that because they're
so different. Sides are so many different situations and aspects

like I would have to ask them what they're sort
of break up in tails and like are you friends
with this person still? Did they break up with you?
Did you get cheated on? Did you cheat on them?
Like there's so many there's not a blanket answer to
like how do you move? Are so complicated? Yeah, because
there are people. It's people. Everyone's complicated. If we try

to simplify people to as not bad, then it's just
like I have the answer, here's what you do. I
will say. In both those situations I talked about, I
was writing, So journaling it really does help you. I
need to get into it. It's just committing myself to it.
Just like helping you process your own life. Something about

writing it down I get more clarity. That's so interesting
because I got into it last year for like a month,
and then my anxiety got really bad and I was like, no,
I'm not going to do this any Did you find
that you got more anxious because you were writing? No?
I felt better after I was. For some reason, I
just stopped. I know, twenties for getting back into journaling,

twenties for journalingaling. Yeah, I can't recommend enough, even if
you're just getting up in the morning having your coffee
or whatever. You you don't Arnold Palmer, right, I have
at okay? Good? I was like, even if it's just
like a couple of sentences, just something or like a paragraph,
just like literally starting your day with like here's where

I'm at, or like who am I today? Sometimes I'll
start with that question who am I today? Who am
I today? I love that because I while all versions
and different facets are me, different days call for different
parts of me. Do you do different outfits to show
your different styles? That's what I do? Yeah, So who

are you today? Oh? Um, I'm hot? Yeah, I am confident,
I am chatty. Hell yeah, I feel like opinionated. And
there's a boy in town, so I'm like feeling sexy
love yeah, but like so thriving. For instance, for days ago,

my mom was in town and I was in my
pajamas all day with her and we were watching movies,
and that girl was just like, who am I today?
If I ask a question who am I today? I
would say, I'm RESTful, I'm like appreciating the present with
my mom. I'm meditative, I'm chill. Do you meditate? No,

I've been doing it, and I don't have the patience.
But I've been doing like five ten minutes meditations on
my two like in the morning, and i do it
for like ten minutes because I'm already half asleep, so
it's like I'm already in that zone. Kind of think
it's helping so much. Really, I noticed a big difference
in my day. I can send you the YouTube link
I use. It's for confidence and for manifestation. Okay, I

will watch your meditative YouTube if you commit to start
journaling again. Okay, I can actually do that. Do you
feel like I'm going to place where I can do that?
You do it? So it's kind of like when you're
like I'm gonna like start working out more, and then
the first thing you do is like buy a cute
workout I never I didn't just do that. I didn't

just buy a second workout top. I would never o'n't
take one yoga class and bought a workout top. Why
would I? It's part of inspiring yourself to keep going.
But like buying a cute new journal maybe at the
cute bookstore that you go and have. Do you have journals?
I bet you'll want a journal when you get your
fancy new like cute journal and you're like, oh that

you can't wait to read this in thirty years. Okay,
have you read your journals or are you waiting for
a certain time like I'm when I'm fifty or sixty
I'm gonna look back? Or do you just go through? Honestly,
I think I'm going to burn them all? Why because
I am so ratchet and too honest and I don't
want my kids to know. You have to know, and

I need to know, like I would write things down
that I wouldn't want someone to find. End, Yeah, say
out like I get to be. I let myself be
as real as possible and kind of as ratchet as possible,
and so like I let out some anger, I let
out selfishness, I let out jealousy, and it's not cute,

like sometimes that girl in the page isn't cute. I
think that's what my issue is with journaling is that
I tried so hard to like pick my words so
carefully and be like this was my day and today
in this But I think I just need to go
be honest and just right. I would say, have you
ever read the artist way? I have not, but it
sounds cool. Okay. The Artist Way is a book that

changed my life. And there's this thing that it's called
The Morning Pages. Writing it down, Write it down, Julia something, Cameron. Yes,
I have two copies. I should have brought one. Um.
I talked about this book so much. But the Morning
Pages is like a practice that you do, and it's

kind of to like unlocked, like de clog your vision
and artistic inspiration and creativity. So no burnout, so less burnout.
I have to be honest. Show tour and sharing music
videos and getting ready to go to New York Fashion
Week and then going to put out an album soon.

Like there's a lot going on, and I am so
well rested. How are you mentally, I'm fantastic. That's amazing.
I've never been happier. Yeah, thanks, that's awesome. I feel
like also I also know when enough is enough tour,
I was like, I cannot do another show for a

little while, and that needed like I needed to set
my own boundaries. And now I get this good nice break,
put out the album, and then I go to Australia
and I play like four more shows before the end
of the year. Are you performing anywhere else that I
can see you at. I mean next year, next year,
I said that. Next year, Um, where else am I playing?

And then I do a festival in Mexico. I'll be
fun to this year in November. Yeah, I've never been,
so that'll be cool. It sounds like two is just
your year. And so when you do look back, you're like, actually,
that was pretty rocking. I was pretty bad. We did
Seth Myers. Yes, yes, which, oh my god, yeah, I um,

I have really Yeah. I think I've just made my
peace with my life. It's not like I don't get tired.
I let myself get tired and then I rest, Yeah,
I sleep, yeah, and then I I only do what's
fun for me to like good. I just choose what's fun.
I'm so glad you chose this podcast. I know this
is so fun. We have to take a more quick break,

but when we come back, I want to talk about
your new album Ray, your favorite collaboration, and much more.
We'll be right back and we're back. I think something
I'm I'm very excited for for this new era for
everyone to listen to Ray. Is it the variety on there.

Every song feels different and That's what I love about it.
It has like some different vibes to it, and this
new era it's all about being sexy, being a badass,
loving yourself. What else is this era for for you?
And this album? What does it represent for you? Freedom?
I think freedom from like not even from other people,

but just like from my own sense of like who
I thought I was supposed to be, I was supposed
to look, how I was supposed to sound like it.
It's definitely take off like a filter for this new era.
It feels very like I'm kind of bearing it all
in a lot of ways. I mean literally, I'm like

fully naked at the end of a music video. I
mean I'm covered in the right spots, but like just
a little making just a little covered enough, but like
really and authentically bearing it all in a way that
I've never let myself go there before. And it's been
so liberating, and I think, I guess my hope is

that other people will feel liberated as well by listening
to it. Well, I've been feeling really liberated when I've
been overthinking it. I've been listening to it and it's
been very helpful. I've been going on my mental health
walks and I listen to another man's jeans and I'm like, hell, yeah,
it's just fun. It's fun. It's fun music. There's definitely
a couple like Introspective count on Me I Love and

Love You Need are two songs that when I heard,
I was just like, I think Love You Need is
my favorite. That's one of my favorite too, because it's
like it's so true. If you haven't listened to it,
you know what I mean, it's so true. Yeah, it's
just like a really sweet, beautiful song, like so wholesome,
and like the piano part is so inspired by Carol

King like that it just makes me immediately feel like comforted.
Can I tell you that my mom said that you
reminded her of Carol King and a mix of Carol
King and Sheryl Crow and Sheryl Crow like she said
a mix, And I was like, okay, that's a really
good I agree with the Carol King. I have tellten
Ryl Crow to see you, but I agree with Carol King,

Oh for sure, Sheryl Crow. All I wanna do is
have some fun. You realize how a Caryl Crow? Yeah,
oh my goodness, No, You're not the only that's such
a good song. Any collaborations that you want to do
or that are happening, there's one. There's one collaboration on

this album, and I I can't I can't even wrap
my head around it yet, because this person has been
my idol. Literally, this person I wish I could just
play the voicemail I have. Uh. This person is Diane Keaton. Yeah,

and I like she. I've watched every film she's ever made.
Her personality has informed my personality, Like I she made me.
She made me I am meeting I am objectively who
I am because of her, like I love that I
am because of my mom and because of a lot

of things. Right now about Diane Keaton, Um, I just
think she's one of the most wonderful people in the world.
And I have the honor of meeting her in the studio.
She came to like our grounds. She was on my
turf when I met her. That like meeting Diane Keaton,
You're I felt like a superhero. I was like, you are,

and I'm also a human beings a superhero and he
does it all. Um. It was really like empowering because
she was recording vocals on a song that I had
written and I'm like there vocal producing her, telling her

what like helping her through yeah, like you know, sitting
with the line here, or like let's just repeat that. Well,
let's just sing this in the room together until we
get really comfortable, and like it just was such like
I couldn't what a strange way to meet your hero,
to like be coaching them. What was that moment? Like
was it just surreal or did not hit you till afterwards?

I tried to be very present because I didn't want
that to happen I didn't want to like black out
for the experience and then like be like what happened?
So I was pretty present for it And did you
just go over it all the time ever since it happened? Yeah,
I still like I it's just one of those things

that I think, like again, maybe acknowledging some manifestation, like
I my whole life have looked up to her and
to be in a room with her, not just meeting
her at like an award show or yeah, like oh
my gosh, I'm your biggest fan, like literally having her

in my space and her singing words I wrote, how
did you like I'm living a miracle. It's like I'm
if I die tomorrow, I'm good. Yeah, you're just like
you're like you're chilling. I'm good. Yeah, I'm so happy.
So I think, Yeah, moments when life gets hard or tiring,

I'm just like, shut up. You're like Diane Keaton, if
you complain one more time, I whar to god ash
like you have. Yeah, Diane Keaton literally is singing your song.
So just literally, have anyone say that to you if
you ever feeling that, just dying keating those words, and
you'll be like, yeah, you're right. You'll be like, oh,
you're so right. She's my iPhone background. She really Yeah.

My lock screen is the boy I'm saying, Oh, I
mean with I'm with him, it's not just a him um.
And then my home screen is me and Diane Keaton.
It should be. Then I'm like, my life is amazing.
Are there any other manifestations you want to put out
there right now? Because like you did for the album WHOA,

I don't know. Honestly, it's dangerous. Careful what you ask for,
because in my experience, I get the things I want. Well,
let's do it. I'm scared. I'm scared. Why are you scared?
I don't know. I'll go first, I manifest have Linman
when Rando my podcast, his dad came on my podcast,

Anthony Ramos came on, We're so close, yet so far
has to happen. That's around the corners um and then
being content within myself and if anything else that's added.
I love that your turn. That's I was just thinking
about me going careful what you manifest. I literally, for

like two months in December of last year, I really
wanted Chase Stokes to do a music video with me,
and I would literally journal every day like I'm so
grateful that Chase Stokes is the co lead in my
next music video, so grateful that I get to work
with him. And we just signed the contract. Like I

literally am like just saying like it's already happening, and
because he's not, we're not doing a music video together,
but we're friends now, and bend him this clip maybe yeah.
I literally he was like he hit me about the
song that I originally imagine him being in the US.

I hope you're not happy, Oh okay, And I was
like I really wanted to like do this whole like
love or montage thing with Chase Stokes I just feel
like it would be so hot. Would you ever direct
a music video? Heck, yeah, I could see it. That
would be amazing. I just don't I honestly, I love
the director I work with, and it takes a lot

of the pressure. What I don't want to do is
direct a music video to say that I directed. You
want to do it because it's your vision. You want
to execute it? Yeah, you want it because I have
to do it, not to say not to be like
and I directed it, and then you don't come about
the title. Don't die on the freaking that cross. I
don't care. So, and what I love about my amazing

director is he like he takes off so much pressure
of me. So it is my vision and I am
doing a bunch of the directing, but someone just helping
you ask execute it. Yeah, that's fine. I don't know.
That was random. Um, I would like to One day
we're with Harry Styles, I can say I'm going to
Harry Wean, which I'm so excited for us. Oh my gosh,

that's gonna be so much fun. I'm so excited to
know how or when or in what. Literally, maybe it's
not even a song, Maybe it's just like we write
a book together, maybe we do a podcast together with
Harry Styles. Yeah, like it doesn't have to be I
feel like oftentimes the universe will be like, okay, it's
like me, my whole manifesting Diane Keaton. I just wanted

to meet her, and then the universe was like, how
about she sing on one of your songs? And then
I was like, that's so much better. So I'll let
the universe decide how Harry and I will hang out. Yeah,
that kind of happened to me. Actually, it's kind of
how the podcast happened. I didn't expect to get anything.
I just wanted to well, I originally wanted to really

interview Julian Michaels because of her song Anxiety really helped me.
And then I pitched it and they're like, yeah, you
get a pilot. Have you interviewed her? She was the pilot.
She was the and then because of her we got
renewed and now we're launching our fourth season. So you
know know, but well, you manifest. I didn't even think
it would I'd get an episode and here we are
over forty two episodes later. What was that like for

you when you got to interviewer about the song that
helped change your life. It was really helpful because it
was because of that song I got to get out
of my own head um and that's what created the podcast.
So I owe so much to her and which was
a lovely moment. So like, I bet she really I
bet that really touched her. Julia Michaels. Yeah, you guys

should work together. Oh that collaboration, Oh my goodness. You know.
But the only thing with me and her is we
do the same thing in the room. So I'm imagining like,
but that's why I feel like it would just be
like that on steroids, like even better, or we're fighting
each other the whole time. I don't think it would.
I think I think you have very similar vibes. Really

absolutely good. Like I've not I've ran into her in
passing once, but we've not hung out. You may not
be manifesting it, but I'm manifesting it for you. Okay,
next album, it will just be like, oh my god,
featuring Julia Michaels. It'll be like, oh my god, that
would be cute. Right, I'll let you manifest that for
me to the future, to us into ray and your

twenties and the next chapter for you. Fine, yeah, well
everyone go listen to Ray. Ash. Thank you so much
for taking the time to talk and chat and get
real and just being yourself because it's so wonderful. Thank you,
It's been such an honor. I've had a really good time.
Thanks for having me, Thank you for coming. Amazing, so fun.

I just want to thank Ash again for coming on
my podcast and taking the time. Make sure you check
out her new album Ray. It is absolutely phenomenal, highly recommend. Anyways,
I will see you guys next week with a new episode.
Oh feels good to say that again. Bye guys. M hm.
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