A Real Affliction: BPD, Culture, and Stigma

How does the health care system condition how we see our mental health treatment and diagnoses? In this interview—an excerpt from a much longer conversation—I talk with Samantha Dellosso, a social worker, health administrator, and friend of forty years. She and I discuss Medicaid in the U.S., viewing personality disorders along a spectrum, and how adverse childhood experiences (ACEs) don’t necessarily determine who we turn out to b...

How does BPD impact reproductive choices? In this candid interview, Sara Abbott, the host and producer of the #1 Bold Beautiful Borderline podcast, talks with me about how BPD is affecting her decision to have children. We also discuss intergenerational trauma and the stigma she encountered while getting her Master of Social Work degree.

Trigger warning: This episode discusses suicide.

If you are having thoughts of suicide, call or...

What can we learn from the posthumously published diary of Lara Gilbert, a young Canadian woman with BPD traits who suffered from complex PTSD in the 1990s? In this episode, I read excerpts from I Might Be Nothing: Journal Writing, a selection of writings from the 3200-page diary of Lara Gilbert, which I read in the archives of the University of Victoria. Lara was a brilliant and talented writer, and I wanted some of her words to b...

What is the relationship between BPD and food security? BPD and food insecurity are prevalent among university students, and research shows that poor diets, both in terms of insufficient calories and an overreliance on ultra-processed foods, fuel mood dysregulation, depression, and suicidality. I believe that most universities could do more to support student food security, food sovereignty in the community, and overall mental well...

Why do people living with mental illness, including BPD, need to think about bioethics? Because ordinary citizens can now make life-and-death decisions for themselves and others. As laws and regulations change around issues such as involuntary hospitalization and medical assistance in dying, it’s important for everyone to read and watch lectures about bioethics to protect themselves, but it’s essential for those of us suffering fro...

Why is Laura Palmer a heroine for many of us? Because David Lynch's depiction of her in the Twin Peaks franchise was one of the first and remains one of the most powerful depictions of complex trauma from child sexual abuse. In this interview with professor and writer Courtenay Stallings, we talk about her wonderful book, Laura’s Ghost: Women Speak About Twin Peaks, and how the late, great Lynch catalyzed discussions of the long-...

Can recreational drugs be used to treat BPD in controlled environments? In this interview, I talk with Lucy Yanow, who holds a master’s degree in Bioethics and Society and formerly worked as a midwife, doula, and protector of reproductive rights. I ask her about her experience taking ketamine pills for depression and suicidality, but our conversation detours in rich and surprising ways. Lucy opens up about how her family’s history ...

How can an urban fantasy novel save lives? By depicting a protagonist with BPD who is resourceful, loyal, and heroic. In Borderline, the first book in the Arcadia Project trilogy, author and BPD survivor Mishell Baker does just that. In this interview, her perspectives on her books and her life reveal a woman who has found strength and inner peace after agony. As she says to me, “If you die by your own hand, you don't know if your ...

What can a psychoanalyst learn from patients with BPD? In this interview, Dr. Alexander Kriss, author of the recently published Borderline: Biography of a Personality Disorder, shares insights gained from treating patients with the disorder. We discuss his book, which tells the story of one patient’s recovery while also deconstructing the BPD diagnosis and the broader conceptions of madness and femininity that have created an eve...

Why should we draw on the field of disability studies to envision, treat, and talk about BPD? In this second and final part of my interview with Professor Lisa Johnson, author of Girl in Need of a Tourniquet: Memoir of a Borderline Personality, we explore this question and others, including the connection between BPD and sexuality, why we might diagnose fictional characters with BPD, and the form of her memoir, which “sutured toget...

What does writing from the frontline of BPD look like? If the author is borderline up-ender Dr. Lisa Johnson, it looks and sounds like a witty, raw, and dazzling conflagration. In this interview, she and I discuss her memoir, Girl in Need of a Tourniquet: Memoir of a Borderline Personality, and share our experiences of navigating academia while being open about our BPD diagnoses.

Merri Lisa Johnson, Girl in Need of a Tourniquet

Mer...

Can movement therapy support people with BPD? In this interview, psychotherapist, licensed martial artist, and acclaimed writer Ellis Amdur describes his success with teaching baduanjin qigong, a Chinese breathing and movement system, to a patient suffering from acute BPD.

If you are having thoughts of suicide, call or text 988 to reach the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline or go to SpeakingOfSuicide.com/resources for a list of addit...

How do therapists come to think of BPD after a long career? In this conversation with Ellis Amdur—a retired psychotherapist, award-winning writer, and licensed martial artist—he offers his perspective on BPD, including what a background in Jungian psychology taught him about our singular and ever-evolving journeys. Trigger warning: This episode mentions suicide.

If you are having thoughts of suicide, call or text 988 to reach the 9...

How have power dynamics between doctors and patients changed over the past century and a half? In my second and final interview with Nina Shope, author of the award-winning historical novel Asylum, we talk about the complicated relationship between neurologist Jean-Martin Charcot and his most famous patient as he treated her for hysteria and documented her in photographs during the 1870s. Nina reflects on the photograph of Augustin...

What did BPD look like in the 19th century? It looked like hysteria, a phenomenon that puzzled doctors and fascinated the public. In this episode, I interview Nina Shope, author of the award-winning historical novel Asylum, which explores the power dynamics between Jean-Martin Charcot, the father of neurology as we know it today, and his most famous patient. In the shadows of this dynamic, we find symptoms and conceptualizations of...

How can we access expensive care? In the US, being diagnosed with BPD is often the first step in an odyssey through a complex and unjust health care system. In the second part of my interview with Paula Tusiani-Eng, co-founder of Emotions Matter, she discusses how to get life-saving coverage from your insurer, the wonderful success of her organization's peer support groups, the wild creativity that many of us with BPD have, and why...

What do people with BPD need? When Paula Tusiani-Eng co-founded a BPD non-profit after the tragic loss of her sister Pamela, she realized that we often need more community support. In this interview, Paula tells me about Pamela’s struggle with BPD in the 1990s and how Emotions Matter has built a community for others like her.

If you are having thoughts of suicide, call or text 988 to reach the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline or go ...