February 25, 2025 • 24 mins
Episode 56: Overcoming Limitations: The Role of Ego and Self-Belief
In this episode, the host delves into the concept of what holds us back in life, focusing on how our internal dialogue, or ego, can both help and hinder us. The discussion covers the evolution of human cognition, the protective nature of our internal sense of identity, and the limitations it imposes. The host shares personal experiences and insights, emphasizing the importance of challenging negative self-beliefs and nurturing a strong suspicion about one's potential. The episode concludes with a call to embrace fear, set audacious goals, and live boldly to unlock one's true capabilities.
00:00 Introduction: What Holds Us Back?
01:29 The Power of Internal Dialogue
02:03 Evolution of the Ego 04:23 Personal Anecdotes and Lessons
05:45 Breaking Through Limiting Beliefs
12:54 Embracing Uncertainty and Potential
16:10 Marianne Williamson's Inspirational Poem
19:32 Challenge Your Beliefs and Set Unreasonable Goals
22:46 Conclusion and Final Thoughts
23:40 Outro and Podcast Information
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:02):
What holds us back?
Interesting question that I'vehad for myself for a long time.
Even at the point of my life where Ifelt like, like I had nothing to offer.
Um, I was basically useless thatthere was nothing, nothing I
(00:27):
could contribute in this life.
I still had this idea thatsomething was holding me back.
But I kind of believe that that waswho I was like, useless, uh, stupid.
Yeah.
(00:51):
And I remember I, I heardthis quote a long time ago.
It's like, it just goes like this.
It's not who we believewe are that holds us back.
It's who we think we're not.
And.
I kind of want to elaboratethat in a bit though.
(01:12):
I think it's both, you know,
it's both like who we believe weare holds us back and who we believe
we're not holds us back, which kindof kind of puts us in this conundrum.
Um, I've said it before in otherpodcasts, but this idea of, you know,
(01:36):
the internal dialogue, the conversationthat's going on in our head all the time.
Um, yeah.
I really believe that that'swhat, what we call ego.
And that's not a sense of bravito,but it's like an identity.
Like I, me, my, who, all that, everythingthat you are, if you're listening to
(02:00):
that internal dialogue is who you are.
And for the most part, the, the internaldialogue or the sense of identity
or the ego, if you want to call it,
Is designed for a purpose, right?
It's, it's not actually,
(02:22):
it's not detri, it's notsupposed to be detrimental.
It has a, it has a job, right?
If you think about you go back far enough,there was the sympathetic nervous system.
Maybe when the brains were smaller,um, cognition was, was not as much.
And
(02:43):
the whole sympathetic nervous systemwas designed for fight or flight, right?
There's a tiger coming, in thatmoment you decide, am I going to fight
this or am I going to run from it?
And then as our brains gotbigger, our craniums got bigger,
we started creating more.
(03:04):
Cognition, more, um, understandingof our place in life, that
it wasn't just the tiger.
It was like, Oh no, the rains are coming.
Are we going to drown?
And it's like, Oh, the droughts here,are we going to have food for the winter?
And then as time went by, it also wentto another level where, you know, now,
(03:28):
now it's like, Oh, my boss is mad at me.
I'm going to lose my job.
So, as, as our brains evolved and gotbigger and cognitions got greater, then
somehow we evolved this sense of identity,this internal dialogue, this inner
conversation that we live with every day.
(03:50):
And the big job of this was to, todeal with existential threats, like,
like to prepare, to put like, ohno, this is coming, let's raise the,
raise the blood pressure, raise thepulse, get ready to fight or run.
And the whole design of this is,this internal dialogue or this
(04:14):
ego or sense of identity is toprotect you from getting hurt.
And I'll, I'll describe it like this,um, I remember probably grade 5 or 6 we
were in class and it was the end of theyear or Christmas, I can't remember.
(04:34):
And you get a prize if you do somethingand the teacher said if you can dance
to this music you get a prize and I did.
And that's it.
I was just having fun.
And then I, you know, heard somebody,what a loser, like all this self
expression and like, what a loser.
(04:55):
And something inside me ain'tgoing to let that happen again.
And for the rest of my life, anytimeup till now, of course, anytime I
went outside, like with a massive,like if I tried to have a massive,
um, Or I wanted to do somethingthat would overly express myself.
(05:16):
I, I was more comfortable hiding.
'cause my brain was like,don't, don't, don't, don't.
You're gonna get hurt.
You're gonna get hurt.
You're gonna get hurt.
So I wouldn't express myself, Icouldn't talk in front of PE people.
I couldn't talk in front of a crowd.
Um, I, I couldn't answerquestions from the teacher.
And that was my internal dialogue, my,my sense of self, my sense of identity,
(05:40):
going through my ego saying, don't do it.
You're going to get hurt.
And that's what that internaldialogue is actually.
It's job is to keep you safe,which is not a terrible thing.
But the problem is the method that it usesto keep you safe is by keeping you small.
And if you don't, if you don't want to besmall, if you want to be extraordinary,
(06:03):
you want to break out of this lifetime,you have to find a way to get past it.
And the sense of identity, itfigures out who you are, right?
I am this, this is who I am.
And if you try to go anything past thator bigger than that, then it's fear, fear,
(06:25):
blood pressure raises, stress, anxiety.
So it's like, maybe you can understand,it's like when you're up to big things,
like you're coming as an athlete,you're coming to a big competition
or a big race, like you, you have afinite amount of who you are, right?
I hear all the time fromathletes, it's like, Oh, well,
I hope I get to go to world.
(06:46):
I'm going to world because maybe there'spart of that internal dialogue that
internal identity that says well You'regood runner But I don't know if you're
that good and don't don't don't put itout there Because you're gonna get hurt
if it doesn't make it if you don't getthere So maybe this is where the anxiety
(07:07):
is coming the night before a race or asyou're coming into something big Maybe
so this internal this ego.
It's decided exactly who you are
The problem with knowing who youare in any way, shape, or form,
(07:30):
anything we know to be a fact aboutourselves limits us to that fact.
So if we know we're this,we're limited to this.
We can never break past that.
And there's so manyinteresting things out there.
Like, in the running world,you see, the Africans are the
pinnacle of running, basically.
(07:53):
And that's part of their collectiveego, so And, and we're not, I'm not
minimizing what they do or how hardthey work or how important it is.
There's, there's so many factors to that.
But the truth is theircollective ego says that, right?
And then the world collective egosays, oh, they're, they're too fast.
They're, I'll never beat them.
(08:14):
So that's the, what you, like,it's who you think you're not
that's also going to hold you back.
If you live a life thinking thatyou will never break a record,
it's not a guarantee, but it's highlyunlikely that you'll ever break a record.
(08:38):
You know, if you live a lifethat, you know, I'm, like, like
me, for many years, I didn't knowI was dyslexic when I was young.
I didn't know why it was, myreading was so slow and why
my, my spelling was so bad.
So I just thought I was stupid.
(09:00):
And it's funny, my ego would go,you're stupid, you're stupid, you're
stupid, you're stupid, like so loud.
And there came a point where Ihad all this stuff knowing who
I was, and knowing who I wasn't.
And I was so frustrated with this wholelife of all the stuff I knew, like I, I,
(09:22):
I said, How can I escape this?
And then I realized the truth, of course.
Like I said a moment ago,
anything you know to bea fact about yourself.
limits you to that fact.
And I'm like, so how can Icreate a healthy dose of doubt
(09:45):
around all these things I knew?
Like I'm stupid, I'm aloser, all this stuff.
Because this is who I knew I was, I am.
And every time I challengedit, the fear, the anxiety, the
stress came up like incredibly.
First I had to realize that thatinternal dialogue is going to talk all
the time, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
(10:06):
It still talks sometimes.
And I learned that you can justsay thank you for sharing and go
and do what you got to do anyway.
And you do it scared, and youdo it unprepared, and you do it
afraid, and you do it with anxiety.
You just do it.
You just keep on doing it.
And yeah, sometimes yourlegs will be shaking
(10:27):
and you just do it anyway.
And the more you doit, the easier it gets.
So that was my head on approach.
Like, if I, if I was afraid, I did it.
I remember, I remember there was a timeI, I, I, Shrunk myself so small that I
(10:52):
would basically hide during school breaks.
I didn't want to be around anybody.
It was strange, like my thoughtprocess was life is pain, pain is
life, and if you're not a cause ofthe pain, then you're a victim of it.
And I don't want to be a cause.
So I wouldn't interact with peoplebecause interactions just cause pain.
(11:17):
And I didn't want to stand out becausestanding out caused embarrassment.
And I remember I wasgoing to this youth group.
And I wanted to experiment withlike, low dose, um, do some low dose
things to like, to feel a littlebit of embarrassment and survive.
So I would do stuff like, I hadfluorescent red and orange socks,
(11:40):
so I'd wear mismatched socks, andeverybody's like, Wow, you got mismatched
socks, and I'm like, Ah ha, yes I do!
And slowly expose myself to that.
So, to the point where,it wasn't that bad.
So I was battling that senseof identity at this time.
And I learned that it's okay to Breakthrough those things like it's okay.
(12:07):
So I practice standing out and I practicebeing strange and odd but I mean it
wasn't a perfect method to get me pastit, but it was it was just like like one
of the episodes I Recorded called justtry because you don't have you don't
know what you can do You have no ideawhat you're capable of just try just try
(12:32):
and so that worked a bit
But I still had thoseunderlying beliefs, right?
This is who I am.
And I had to really, really learn thatthat internal dialogue isn't who I am.
It's just the method of keeping me safe.
And it had an idea who I was.
(12:54):
And sitting in this idea that everything,you know, honestly, no matter what it
is, you could think you're the bestrunner in the world and guess what?
You're still holding yourself back.
Anything you, you couldthink you're a great runner.
You're still holding yourself back.
You can think you're useless, you can'trun, you're holding yourself back.
(13:17):
I realized that everything, evenmy strengths, my big strengths,
they were holding me back.
So I decided, what can I do about this?
What can I do when I have all thisbelief that's holding me back?
And I realized, maybe I haveto unlearn who I think I am.
(13:39):
I have to take everything Ithink I am and throw it away.
But then, aren't yousupposed to know yourself?
So I realized one way I coulddo this, it was a little trick.
Like, you know, we're always lookingfor loopholes and like, this is
my loophole for knowing who I am.
(14:01):
I created that I have absolutelyno idea for a fact who I am or what
I'm capable of in this lifetime.
Or in this world.
But I do have strong suspicions.
I have a strong suspicion thatI'm really good at my job and that
I'm really good at seeing patternsin bodies and treating them.
(14:25):
But I don't know how deep that goes.
And like, how?
Deep my understanding of that but andhow much greater I can do I have a strong
suspicion that I really care about peoplelike so deeply but I have no idea How
deep that goes and I like I don't wantto limit it in any way shape or form and
(14:48):
yeah, it's funny I run up against a wallwith this sometimes because when my care
comes out too hard I feel like I feellike I might be too much for people So
I'm working on that because I, oh man, ifI could just be an unlimited expression
of care, completely unreasonable,unlimited, like actually letting people
(15:12):
know how much I love them, that would,and like unabashedly, unforgivingly, uh,
no attachment, just living that life.
So I have no idea how deep my care is.
(15:34):
And I love that because itjust gives me space, right?
I have no idea how greatI could be at podcasting.
Like, I have no idea.
I have a strong suspicion that I,I have this, this little candle
that I've, I've started burning.
And that, I have a strong suspicionthat it's going to help the world.
(15:57):
But I don't know how deeplyand how incredibly that could
be and how big it could get.
I just have this strong suspicion.
You know I love this poem byMarianne Williamson from, uh,
(16:17):
A Return to Love Reflections onPrinciples in a Course in Miracles.
And understand that when people usethe word God, like, this is one of the
things I find in life, is we get reallyhung up on words like love and God.
(16:38):
I typically, if I'm afraid that somebody'sgoing to be overwhelmed by me saying I
love them, I'll say I care about them.
That's code for I love you.
And when I say God, for me Godis not this old white guy sitting
on a throne or 52, uh, differententities overseeing everything.
(17:04):
What I believe God is, is this,this entirety of everything.
Every thing, every molecule, everyatom, every being, everything.
Everything is God.
It's all.
It's universe.
I call it the universe.
(17:25):
So listen to this, because I love this.
Our deepest fear is notthat we're inadequate.
That isn't our deepest fear.
Our deepest fear is thatwe're powerful beyond measure.
It's our light, not ourdarkness, that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, and I've donethis, Who am I to be brilliant,
(17:46):
gorgeous, talented, or fabulous?
Yeah, we minimize.
Who am I to, like, go to nationals?
Who am I to break a record?
Who am I to go to the Olympics?
But the truth is, actually,who are you not to be?
You're a child of God.
You're a child of the universe.
(18:06):
Your playing small does notserve the world or the people
who are looking to you.
There is nothing enlightenedabout shrinking so other people
won't feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine as children do.
We are born to make manifest the gloryof God of the universe that is within us.
(18:31):
It's not just some ofus, it's in everyone.
Every single one has beauty.
And as we let our own light shine,we unconsciously give permission
to other people to do so.
So go out and run and scream your dreams.
(18:55):
As we are liberated, From our own fear,our present automatically liberates other.
So you know, actually declaring whoyou are, being bold and courageous,
getting past these thoughtsthat you don't know who you are,
rising to an occasion, helpseverybody at the same time.
(19:21):
It's not who we believewe are that holds us back.
It's who we believe we're not.
So I challenge you.
Challenge that inner dialogue,that thought process, that,
that, that conversationthat goes in your head.
(19:45):
When it tries to limit you, tellit thank you for sharing and then
go and do what you do anyway.
Next time you go to set a goal andyou're like being really reasonable
about that goal, it's okay toset reasonable goals, set some.
But please, please, pleasecreate one un reasonable goal.
Unbelievably, outrageous, nearlyimpossible goal on top of that.
(20:11):
Don't limit yourself.
When you come up againstfear, walk into it.
I heard this quote, it's so amazing.
Fear is actually
a mile wide, but it's only an inch deep.
(20:32):
From the, when you look at it,it's so incredibly overwhelming.
When you step into it, it doesn'thave the substance you thought it did.
Challenge your beliefs.
Challenge all the beliefsthat hold you back.
(20:54):
And know that even yourreal powerful beliefs,
it's good to have.
But don't forget they're,they're holding you back.
Like, Even if you sit and say,I'm the best runner in Canada.
Well, you've limit yourself to justbeing the best runner in Canada.
(21:17):
Shift it.
I have this strong suspicion thatI'm an amazing runner and that
I'm the best runner in Canada.
But I don't know thatit's just limited to that.
I have a strong suspicion thatI could be on the world stage
with the best of the best.
(21:38):
And I could fight them toe to toe,
and that
I could beat them.
I have a strong suspicionthat I could beat anyone.
I have a strong suspicion that I couldbeat anything I believe about myself.
(22:06):
The whole internal dialogue isjust designed to keep you safe.
It's beautiful.
And it's okay to have alife where you're safe.
Never say don't.
But the truth of life is,
(22:28):
if you want to be extraordinary,
if you want to do great things,
you can't listen to the ego.
You have to challenge it.
You have to tell it,thank you for sharing.
You have to get out there anddo it anyway, because I promise
(22:51):
you one thing in this life.
You will only ever regretthe chances you did not take.
If you go for it.
If you crush all those beliefs.
If you create strong suspicion.
If you wade into thatinch deep, mile wide fear.
(23:16):
The outcome won't matter.
Because you'll be satisfied.
Because you gave it your all.
And that's all that matters.
Just give it your all.
(23:40):
Thanks for listening.
Thank you for listening to thisepisode of conversation with Kimen.
Please follow me on Instagramat conversations with Kimen
and feel free to direct message me.
(24:00):
Also, please share my podcast withanyone you may feel would benefit
from its content and let them know.
And you can find me atconversations with Kimen on Apple
podcasts, Spotify, and Podbean.
Have an amazing day.
What holds us back?
Interesting question that I'vehad for myself for a long time.
Even at the point of my life where Ifelt like, like I had nothing to offer.
Um, I was basically useless thatthere was nothing, nothing I
(00:27):
could contribute in this life.
I still had this idea thatsomething was holding me back.
But I kind of believe that that waswho I was like, useless, uh, stupid.
Yeah.
(00:51):
And I remember I, I heardthis quote a long time ago.
It's like, it just goes like this.
It's not who we believewe are that holds us back.
It's who we think we're not.
And.
I kind of want to elaboratethat in a bit though.
(01:12):
I think it's both, you know,
it's both like who we believe weare holds us back and who we believe
we're not holds us back, which kindof kind of puts us in this conundrum.
Um, I've said it before in otherpodcasts, but this idea of, you know,
(01:36):
the internal dialogue, the conversationthat's going on in our head all the time.
Um, yeah.
I really believe that that'swhat, what we call ego.
And that's not a sense of bravito,but it's like an identity.
Like I, me, my, who, all that, everythingthat you are, if you're listening to
(02:00):
that internal dialogue is who you are.
And for the most part, the, the internaldialogue or the sense of identity
or the ego, if you want to call it,
Is designed for a purpose, right?
It's, it's not actually,
(02:22):
it's not detri, it's notsupposed to be detrimental.
It has a, it has a job, right?
If you think about you go back far enough,there was the sympathetic nervous system.
Maybe when the brains were smaller,um, cognition was, was not as much.
And
(02:43):
the whole sympathetic nervous systemwas designed for fight or flight, right?
There's a tiger coming, in thatmoment you decide, am I going to fight
this or am I going to run from it?
And then as our brains gotbigger, our craniums got bigger,
we started creating more.
(03:04):
Cognition, more, um, understandingof our place in life, that
it wasn't just the tiger.
It was like, Oh no, the rains are coming.
Are we going to drown?
And it's like, Oh, the droughts here,are we going to have food for the winter?
And then as time went by, it also wentto another level where, you know, now,
(03:28):
now it's like, Oh, my boss is mad at me.
I'm going to lose my job.
So, as, as our brains evolved and gotbigger and cognitions got greater, then
somehow we evolved this sense of identity,this internal dialogue, this inner
conversation that we live with every day.
(03:50):
And the big job of this was to, todeal with existential threats, like,
like to prepare, to put like, ohno, this is coming, let's raise the,
raise the blood pressure, raise thepulse, get ready to fight or run.
And the whole design of this is,this internal dialogue or this
(04:14):
ego or sense of identity is toprotect you from getting hurt.
And I'll, I'll describe it like this,um, I remember probably grade 5 or 6 we
were in class and it was the end of theyear or Christmas, I can't remember.
(04:34):
And you get a prize if you do somethingand the teacher said if you can dance
to this music you get a prize and I did.
And that's it.
I was just having fun.
And then I, you know, heard somebody,what a loser, like all this self
expression and like, what a loser.
(04:55):
And something inside me ain'tgoing to let that happen again.
And for the rest of my life, anytimeup till now, of course, anytime I
went outside, like with a massive,like if I tried to have a massive,
um, Or I wanted to do somethingthat would overly express myself.
(05:16):
I, I was more comfortable hiding.
'cause my brain was like,don't, don't, don't, don't.
You're gonna get hurt.
You're gonna get hurt.
You're gonna get hurt.
So I wouldn't express myself, Icouldn't talk in front of PE people.
I couldn't talk in front of a crowd.
Um, I, I couldn't answerquestions from the teacher.
And that was my internal dialogue, my,my sense of self, my sense of identity,
(05:40):
going through my ego saying, don't do it.
You're going to get hurt.
And that's what that internaldialogue is actually.
It's job is to keep you safe,which is not a terrible thing.
But the problem is the method that it usesto keep you safe is by keeping you small.
And if you don't, if you don't want to besmall, if you want to be extraordinary,
(06:03):
you want to break out of this lifetime,you have to find a way to get past it.
And the sense of identity, itfigures out who you are, right?
I am this, this is who I am.
And if you try to go anything past thator bigger than that, then it's fear, fear,
(06:25):
blood pressure raises, stress, anxiety.
So it's like, maybe you can understand,it's like when you're up to big things,
like you're coming as an athlete,you're coming to a big competition
or a big race, like you, you have afinite amount of who you are, right?
I hear all the time fromathletes, it's like, Oh, well,
I hope I get to go to world.
(06:46):
I'm going to world because maybe there'spart of that internal dialogue that
internal identity that says well You'regood runner But I don't know if you're
that good and don't don't don't put itout there Because you're gonna get hurt
if it doesn't make it if you don't getthere So maybe this is where the anxiety
(07:07):
is coming the night before a race or asyou're coming into something big Maybe
so this internal this ego.
It's decided exactly who you are
The problem with knowing who youare in any way, shape, or form,
(07:30):
anything we know to be a fact aboutourselves limits us to that fact.
So if we know we're this,we're limited to this.
We can never break past that.
And there's so manyinteresting things out there.
Like, in the running world,you see, the Africans are the
pinnacle of running, basically.
(07:53):
And that's part of their collectiveego, so And, and we're not, I'm not
minimizing what they do or how hardthey work or how important it is.
There's, there's so many factors to that.
But the truth is theircollective ego says that, right?
And then the world collective egosays, oh, they're, they're too fast.
They're, I'll never beat them.
(08:14):
So that's the, what you, like,it's who you think you're not
that's also going to hold you back.
If you live a life thinking thatyou will never break a record,
it's not a guarantee, but it's highlyunlikely that you'll ever break a record.
(08:38):
You know, if you live a lifethat, you know, I'm, like, like
me, for many years, I didn't knowI was dyslexic when I was young.
I didn't know why it was, myreading was so slow and why
my, my spelling was so bad.
So I just thought I was stupid.
(09:00):
And it's funny, my ego would go,you're stupid, you're stupid, you're
stupid, you're stupid, like so loud.
And there came a point where Ihad all this stuff knowing who
I was, and knowing who I wasn't.
And I was so frustrated with this wholelife of all the stuff I knew, like I, I,
(09:22):
I said, How can I escape this?
And then I realized the truth, of course.
Like I said a moment ago,
anything you know to bea fact about yourself.
limits you to that fact.
And I'm like, so how can Icreate a healthy dose of doubt
(09:45):
around all these things I knew?
Like I'm stupid, I'm aloser, all this stuff.
Because this is who I knew I was, I am.
And every time I challengedit, the fear, the anxiety, the
stress came up like incredibly.
First I had to realize that thatinternal dialogue is going to talk all
the time, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
(10:06):
It still talks sometimes.
And I learned that you can justsay thank you for sharing and go
and do what you got to do anyway.
And you do it scared, and youdo it unprepared, and you do it
afraid, and you do it with anxiety.
You just do it.
You just keep on doing it.
And yeah, sometimes yourlegs will be shaking
(10:27):
and you just do it anyway.
And the more you doit, the easier it gets.
So that was my head on approach.
Like, if I, if I was afraid, I did it.
I remember, I remember there was a timeI, I, I, Shrunk myself so small that I
(10:52):
would basically hide during school breaks.
I didn't want to be around anybody.
It was strange, like my thoughtprocess was life is pain, pain is
life, and if you're not a cause ofthe pain, then you're a victim of it.
And I don't want to be a cause.
So I wouldn't interact with peoplebecause interactions just cause pain.
(11:17):
And I didn't want to stand out becausestanding out caused embarrassment.
And I remember I wasgoing to this youth group.
And I wanted to experiment withlike, low dose, um, do some low dose
things to like, to feel a littlebit of embarrassment and survive.
So I would do stuff like, I hadfluorescent red and orange socks,
(11:40):
so I'd wear mismatched socks, andeverybody's like, Wow, you got mismatched
socks, and I'm like, Ah ha, yes I do!
And slowly expose myself to that.
So, to the point where,it wasn't that bad.
So I was battling that senseof identity at this time.
And I learned that it's okay to Breakthrough those things like it's okay.
(12:07):
So I practice standing out and I practicebeing strange and odd but I mean it
wasn't a perfect method to get me pastit, but it was it was just like like one
of the episodes I Recorded called justtry because you don't have you don't
know what you can do You have no ideawhat you're capable of just try just try
(12:32):
and so that worked a bit
But I still had thoseunderlying beliefs, right?
This is who I am.
And I had to really, really learn thatthat internal dialogue isn't who I am.
It's just the method of keeping me safe.
And it had an idea who I was.
(12:54):
And sitting in this idea that everything,you know, honestly, no matter what it
is, you could think you're the bestrunner in the world and guess what?
You're still holding yourself back.
Anything you, you couldthink you're a great runner.
You're still holding yourself back.
You can think you're useless, you can'trun, you're holding yourself back.
(13:17):
I realized that everything, evenmy strengths, my big strengths,
they were holding me back.
So I decided, what can I do about this?
What can I do when I have all thisbelief that's holding me back?
And I realized, maybe I haveto unlearn who I think I am.
(13:39):
I have to take everything Ithink I am and throw it away.
But then, aren't yousupposed to know yourself?
So I realized one way I coulddo this, it was a little trick.
Like, you know, we're always lookingfor loopholes and like, this is
my loophole for knowing who I am.
(14:01):
I created that I have absolutelyno idea for a fact who I am or what
I'm capable of in this lifetime.
Or in this world.
But I do have strong suspicions.
I have a strong suspicion thatI'm really good at my job and that
I'm really good at seeing patternsin bodies and treating them.
(14:25):
But I don't know how deep that goes.
And like, how?
Deep my understanding of that but andhow much greater I can do I have a strong
suspicion that I really care about peoplelike so deeply but I have no idea How
deep that goes and I like I don't wantto limit it in any way shape or form and
(14:48):
yeah, it's funny I run up against a wallwith this sometimes because when my care
comes out too hard I feel like I feellike I might be too much for people So
I'm working on that because I, oh man, ifI could just be an unlimited expression
of care, completely unreasonable,unlimited, like actually letting people
(15:12):
know how much I love them, that would,and like unabashedly, unforgivingly, uh,
no attachment, just living that life.
So I have no idea how deep my care is.
(15:34):
And I love that because itjust gives me space, right?
I have no idea how greatI could be at podcasting.
Like, I have no idea.
I have a strong suspicion that I,I have this, this little candle
that I've, I've started burning.
And that, I have a strong suspicionthat it's going to help the world.
(15:57):
But I don't know how deeplyand how incredibly that could
be and how big it could get.
I just have this strong suspicion.
You know I love this poem byMarianne Williamson from, uh,
(16:17):
A Return to Love Reflections onPrinciples in a Course in Miracles.
And understand that when people usethe word God, like, this is one of the
things I find in life, is we get reallyhung up on words like love and God.
(16:38):
I typically, if I'm afraid that somebody'sgoing to be overwhelmed by me saying I
love them, I'll say I care about them.
That's code for I love you.
And when I say God, for me Godis not this old white guy sitting
on a throne or 52, uh, differententities overseeing everything.
(17:04):
What I believe God is, is this,this entirety of everything.
Every thing, every molecule, everyatom, every being, everything.
Everything is God.
It's all.
It's universe.
I call it the universe.
(17:25):
So listen to this, because I love this.
Our deepest fear is notthat we're inadequate.
That isn't our deepest fear.
Our deepest fear is thatwe're powerful beyond measure.
It's our light, not ourdarkness, that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, and I've donethis, Who am I to be brilliant,
(17:46):
gorgeous, talented, or fabulous?
Yeah, we minimize.
Who am I to, like, go to nationals?
Who am I to break a record?
Who am I to go to the Olympics?
But the truth is, actually,who are you not to be?
You're a child of God.
You're a child of the universe.
(18:06):
Your playing small does notserve the world or the people
who are looking to you.
There is nothing enlightenedabout shrinking so other people
won't feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine as children do.
We are born to make manifest the gloryof God of the universe that is within us.
(18:31):
It's not just some ofus, it's in everyone.
Every single one has beauty.
And as we let our own light shine,we unconsciously give permission
to other people to do so.
So go out and run and scream your dreams.
(18:55):
As we are liberated, From our own fear,our present automatically liberates other.
So you know, actually declaring whoyou are, being bold and courageous,
getting past these thoughtsthat you don't know who you are,
rising to an occasion, helpseverybody at the same time.
(19:21):
It's not who we believewe are that holds us back.
It's who we believe we're not.
So I challenge you.
Challenge that inner dialogue,that thought process, that,
that, that conversationthat goes in your head.
(19:45):
When it tries to limit you, tellit thank you for sharing and then
go and do what you do anyway.
Next time you go to set a goal andyou're like being really reasonable
about that goal, it's okay toset reasonable goals, set some.
But please, please, pleasecreate one un reasonable goal.
Unbelievably, outrageous, nearlyimpossible goal on top of that.
(20:11):
Don't limit yourself.
When you come up againstfear, walk into it.
I heard this quote, it's so amazing.
Fear is actually
a mile wide, but it's only an inch deep.
(20:32):
From the, when you look at it,it's so incredibly overwhelming.
When you step into it, it doesn'thave the substance you thought it did.
Challenge your beliefs.
Challenge all the beliefsthat hold you back.
(20:54):
And know that even yourreal powerful beliefs,
it's good to have.
But don't forget they're,they're holding you back.
Like, Even if you sit and say,I'm the best runner in Canada.
Well, you've limit yourself to justbeing the best runner in Canada.
(21:17):
Shift it.
I have this strong suspicion thatI'm an amazing runner and that
I'm the best runner in Canada.
But I don't know thatit's just limited to that.
I have a strong suspicion thatI could be on the world stage
with the best of the best.
(21:38):
And I could fight them toe to toe,
and that
I could beat them.
I have a strong suspicionthat I could beat anyone.
I have a strong suspicion that I couldbeat anything I believe about myself.
(22:06):
The whole internal dialogue isjust designed to keep you safe.
It's beautiful.
And it's okay to have alife where you're safe.
Never say don't.
But the truth of life is,
(22:28):
if you want to be extraordinary,
if you want to do great things,
you can't listen to the ego.
You have to challenge it.
You have to tell it,thank you for sharing.
You have to get out there anddo it anyway, because I promise
(22:51):
you one thing in this life.
You will only ever regretthe chances you did not take.
If you go for it.
If you crush all those beliefs.
If you create strong suspicion.
If you wade into thatinch deep, mile wide fear.
(23:16):
The outcome won't matter.
Because you'll be satisfied.
Because you gave it your all.
And that's all that matters.
Just give it your all.
(23:40):
Thanks for listening.
Thank you for listening to thisepisode of conversation with Kimen.
Please follow me on Instagramat conversations with Kimen
and feel free to direct message me.
(24:00):
Also, please share my podcast withanyone you may feel would benefit
from its content and let them know.
And you can find me atconversations with Kimen on Apple
podcasts, Spotify, and Podbean.
Have an amazing day.
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