March 11, 2025 • 58 mins
Louie Sharp, international speaker, best-selling author, and accelerated business growth consultant, interviews Mike Jones, CEO of Discover Leadership. The discussion focuses on the importance of personal responsibility as a core value. Mike also describes his concept called “feed forward”, giving attention to future actions rather than past mistakes. Together, they detail how leadership requires managing promises rather than expectations, along with maintaining high standards within teams.
🌟 Don’t miss out on being nominated for Mike Jones’ Discover Leadership Program! Email Louie TODAY for your nomination: louie@thegiftedleader.com
🌟 Learn more about Mike’s Discover Leadership Training: www.discoverleadership.com
🌟 Read Mike’s book, 365 Powerful, Positive Thoughts to Start Your Day! https://discoverwebstore.mybigcommerce.com/365-powerful-positive-thoughts-to-start-your-day-book/
Louie’s Leadership & Love Nugs (podcast time stamps)
- Deliver difficult messages with tact and love, while emphasizing personal responsibility (2:46)
- Embrace personal responsibility as foundational to leadership (7:51)
- Use the concept of “feed forward” as a positive alternative to traditional feedback, focusing on future actions rather than past mistakes (24:15)
- Read something positive first thing in the morning (52:12)
- Join the Discover Leadership Facebook page for weekly Hump Day Wisdom (56:26)
#LeadershipandLove #Discoverleadership #Personalresponsibility #Feedforward #Organizationalculture #Thegiftedleader #Podcast
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:01):
Welcome to the Leadership and Love Podcast.
We will cover leadership, mindset, personal development,
and sales and marketing.
You'll experience thought-provoking conversations with both
nationally and internationally recognized leaders.
Our goal is to inspire you and deliver actionable items
that you can implement that will help you accelerate your
(00:22):
growth.
Get ready to discover the magic and the power when you lead
with love.
Welcome back, everybody,
to another episode of Leadership and Love.
Today,
I'm truly humbled and excited for a dear friend of mine,
a mentor,
(00:42):
and a coach that has been in my life for quite a while now,
Mr.
Mike Jones.
Mike Jones is the owner and CEO of Discover Leadership.
And we're going to talk a little bit about that and what
his company does in a little bit.
But I'd like to give you a little bit of a background on
where he came from.
And then I'll turn it over to you, Mike,
to fill in the blanks and the spaces.
(01:04):
But at one point, I met Mike at an event.
And I kind of rolled my eyes at him.
And he said, he knew what crossed my mind.
And I thought, you know, at the time,
I was younger than I am today, obviously.
And I was a little cocky and thought, well, yeah,
what's this guy going to teach me?
Well,
I was in for a rude awakening because he's taught me just a
(01:26):
wealth of information around leadership and a bunch of
other things.
But I want you to know, at one point,
he was a helicopter pilot for the police department in
Texas.
And he's morphed and left that.
And he had a career before that as well.
So he's done a number of things in his life.
But then he came to this thing called Discover Leadership
(01:47):
through his own personal growth and personal journey.
And he's really sharing it with the world.
And trust me when I tell you,
this is a man who changes lives.
This is also a man who lives with the highest level of
integrity that I've ever known.
And I mean that sincerely.
He says, when he's on your team, he means it.
There's times I've called Mike and said, hey, Mike,
(02:08):
I need help.
And he takes the call or he'll call back as soon as
possible.
And he gives me wisdom,
advice and counsel on how to guide myself through whatever
challenge I'm in the middle of.
So Mike, thanks for being here.
And please fill in any of the blanks that I might have left
out.
No, Louie, thank you for having me man.
I just feel honored to be a part of the gifted leadership
(02:32):
and on this incredible podcast that you've launched and
being able to be a part of the genesis of this is really
important to me, and I feel honored for the opportunity.
So thank you.
You're quite welcome.
One of the first things I wanna talk to you about, Mike,
that I think I've never seen anybody do a better job of
this than you.
(02:53):
How would you suggest to our listeners that they deliver a
message?
You deliver hard messages.
Now, I wanna be clear with the audience.
I'm not talking about mean messages or cruel or heartless.
I'm talking about you deliver hard messages with tact and
(03:14):
love.
And you tell people, one of your sayings,
and I'm gonna cover a bunch of your stuff today that I
learned from you.
Well, one of the things you say is,
the sweetest fruit is out in the skinny branches.
But one of the things that you help people understand is
personal responsibility.
And when I brought you into my company for some leadership
training,
one of the first things we talked about was core values and
(03:36):
that's where you went.
So can you please explain to the audience how when you're
delivering a hard message,
how do you deliver it in such a way that it lands and
people aren't offended?
Yeah, well, you know, Louie,
the first thing that we all have to truly just embrace is
the fact that this is not a dress rehearsal,
as far as we know it this life that we have right now is
(03:58):
the only one that we're going to get.
So I like to tell people,
we don't have enough life left to be beaten around the bush
or blowing smoke up people's behinds,
playing politics or behave in a certain way because
somebody's got paper on the wall from the university.
I mean,
the truth is the only thing that's going to get us to a
(04:20):
better place.
Now, I know, you know,
I grew up in church down south down here and in church,
they taught us that the truth will set you free.
But what I've learned in my practice over these 33 years
that I've been doing this, Louie,
as it relates to the things that we have learned,
the things that we have been taught and the things that we
(04:41):
have experienced in our life,
those things that have allowed us to create the self image
of ourselves that we have,
the messages that other people have given us that have
created these identities that we have.
To remain in that truth is what I like to refer to as
(05:04):
imprisonment, because that imprisons you.
So absence of that truth, you know,
if you grew up and somebody told you that you were
worthless or that you would never amount to something or
that you can't do something, that that truth imprisons you.
So absence of that truth is freedom because the truth is
(05:26):
when you come through one of our programs,
we are not going to be looking back at what happened.
We've taken a rearview mirror down.
We're talking about what's available to you right now in
the context of this conversation,
which means everything is available to you.
There is abundance in this universe.
There is not scarcity.
(05:47):
So whatever you want,
if you have the courage to step inside of it,
it's available to you.
And when you meet people like Louie Sharp or you get a
chance to come through Discover Leadership Training,
you have those types of people in your life,
they are going to absolutely require you to step up to
another level in order to be a part of that community.
(06:14):
Absolutely get to the best version of yourself that's
available.
So for me, Louie,
I learned a long time ago that the straightest path to
something is straight to it, not going around it.
So when I am communicating with people,
I like to go right to the point.
I don't care what your title is,
how much paper you got in on the wall from university.
(06:37):
Every last one of us occupies the largest room in the
house, which is a room for improvement.
So if you are open to some new possibilities of somebody
talking to you about things that are in your blind spot
that you may not even be able to see,
then Mike Jones is your guy because I don't have a problem
going that way too soon.
(06:58):
So,
so for those of you listening or who you could be watching
as well.
So Mike just might, and he's, I trust me, you want to,
you want to earmark this bad boy, copy and paste it,
but you're going to listen to this thing over and over
because Mike's going to drop golden nuggets for,
through our whole conversation.
And Mike and I could talk about this for days,
but couple of things he just said,
I want you to understand that everything that we've been
(07:21):
told is a belief and a belief is only a thought that you
think over and over and over.
And so I want you to grab what Mike said here,
and I want you to challenge every thought that you think
about yourself, because none of it's the truth.
You get to pick what your truth is.
Mike,
you also touched on something and I'd like you to go back
(07:41):
for a minute, if you would,
and talk about personal responsibility,
because that's really the core of where you start your
programs and your training to help people start to move the
needle.
And you know, Louie, I have four biological sons,
and everything that I have ever done through my leadership
training was absolutely tested on them.
(08:01):
So they were my lab rats.
So as a kid growing up, I lived under, like most kids do,
a command and control environment where mom was, I mean,
she was a single parent, and she was the shit,
she was the boss.
I mean,
and if you question why she was asking you to do something,
(08:23):
the only response that quite often you was going to get is
because I said so.
And what I learned through that process when I had children
of my own was that I wanted to really put them on a journey
to go from dependent to independent.
And I knew that the one thing that they owned in this
(08:43):
universe that, I mean,
nobody could ever take away from them was their word.
So what I started doing with them is I started getting them
to make commitments to very specific things like cleaning a
room or taking out the garbage or washing the dishes.
We made commitments to things.
And what I taught them through that process was that your
(09:06):
word is the only thing that you own.
So when you accept personal responsibility to own it,
it absolutely is going to develop you into a individual who
people can count on.
You know,
there's a whole lot of assumptive trust in the world,
Louie.
People tell us that we should trust people indiscriminately
until they give us a reason not to.
(09:26):
If anybody's listening to that and you live in your life by
that, I'm gonna tell you, bro,
the one thing that you can depend on is that there's gonna
be some disappointment in your future if you keep managing
your relationships like that.
The most authentic trust in the universe is when I tell
Louie Sharp that I'm gonna do something and I am personally
responsible for my word and I do it.
(09:48):
The more and more I build that kind of a relationship,
what we're talking about in my business or in my home,
then there is gonna be trust in that relationship.
And when people have that kind of trust in their
relationship, Louie,
you will play this game differently when you know who has
your back.
So we go into businesses all the time, Louie,
and they wanna talk about core values.
(10:09):
In fact,
most of them have had individuals that have come in,
consultants that have come in,
and they've gone through this process of writing a mission,
vision statement, coming up with core values.
I mean, they have it printed on the walls.
They got it on the plaque cards in the elevator.
They printed it on business cards,
and they've given it to people.
I challenge you right now, if you're listening to this,
(10:32):
if y'all have core values,
I challenge you to look on that card or on that wall and
tell me if personal responsibility is one of the things
that is there because quite often it's not, Louie.
And that's why we have all of these different measures of
levels of management is because people have to be managed
(10:52):
to the outcome.
They are not committed to it because they're not accepting
personal responsibility.
The one thing I challenge you to do, Louie,
you look at the things that are on that core value list,
like integrity, accountability.
Let's definitely go there.
Whatever those things are,
what I want you to observe is that unless personal
(11:16):
responsibility shows up,
none of those things are gonna show up.
And I put accountability in there, Louie,
because a lot of people think that accountability and
personal responsibility are the same.
I am absolutely here to tell you today that they are not
the same.
If I am holding you accountable, however,
I am not accepting personal responsibility,
(11:39):
let's call that blame.
If I'm holding you accountable,
but I'm not accepting personal responsibility,
there's no personal responsibility in this relationship,
that's called blame.
So unless personal responsibility shows up,
you are not gonna get people to extreme ownership of their
position, their roles, and their responsibility.
When personal responsibility shows up,
(12:01):
you will absolutely get them to ownership and extreme
ownership, where you can take your hands off of it,
give them the resources and the authority to do their job,
and they will do their job.
They will not need to be managed because they will be self
-managed.
Boy, I can tell you Mike,
if people just got what you just said,
(12:22):
this whole thing is going to be worthwhile.
And so again, for those of you listening or watching,
I want you to understand that what Mike just said,
it's the foundation of what makes everything work.
It starts with you.
You can't, and I love that you're blaming Mike, you know,
if you're holding somebody accountable,
you're really blaming them because you're not holding up
your end of it.
And I want to repeat something I said about Mike earlier.
(12:44):
I can tell you that he's, he walks the walk.
When I call him or I need something and he said,
I'm on your team, he's never ever, never ever.
And here's what I want to talk about the emotional bank
account a little bit, but he's always been there.
And so he's living what he's talking about because it's
that critical.
And I want you to understand that he's talking about a word
(13:06):
called freedom.
We all want freedom,
but we don't want to do the work to pay for that freedom
and personal responsibility.
And this is what I'm talking about.
Mike, nobody does this better than you.
You deliver this message with such passion and enthusiasm,
but also with the love in your, in your heart.
And I,
and that's why it lands and you have such a big effect in
people's lives.
I'd like you to talk now,
(13:27):
like a kind of transition into that.
I know you've done a bunch of research,
you study and for those of you,
I didn't mention at the beginning of the program.
Mike's a nationally renowned speaker.
He goes into large and small companies and organizations,
literally across the country,
as well as having his own programs.
So Mike, I'd like you to talk about how to,
how to take that personal responsibility and those core
(13:49):
values because they are, are critical,
but you're absolutely right.
The core values don't hold up without that foundation of
personal responsibility.
What do you share with, with organizations,
teams about how to shift or move their culture?
Yeah, and you know, we, we, we as human beings, uh, uh,
on this well-worn path where, uh,
(14:12):
we've been taught what we should do and what we shouldn't
do.
And we go through our entire lives shouldn't all over
ourselves.
I mean,
focus on doing things the way that we've been taught to do
them.
And they seem like they,
that they're the right things to do.
Uh,
the only way for us to identify what's right for me or what's
(14:34):
right for Louie is we have to know what our specific
outcome is.
So if my outcome is to create a better version of myself,
then this is an inside job that only I can do.
It is a, it's an inside job that only I, uh,
can make a commitment to and be personal responsibility,
(14:55):
be responsible for taking some small steps and getting
small wins.
So, and where I want to go with that just for a second,
Louie, if I can,
is that when we're on this well-worn path of doing things
the way that we've been taught,
a part of this human universal paradigm, uh, where,
where we're, we're following, uh, some traditions.
(15:18):
I normally get myself in trouble with that one, but,
but I'm not going to go anywhere, I'm going to go anywhere,
but we're following specific traditions.
And traditions for me, Louie, are the beliefs of the dead.
They are truly the beliefs of the dead and traditional
lisms are the dead beliefs of the living.
So we have taken on these beliefs, uh,
(15:40):
and we've not challenged them, uh, to, uh,
to the extent that we can do something even better than
what somebody else has done, uh, and I,
I know I'm making myself in trouble,
so let me just go on and say it.
When we're living according to the human universal
paradigm, uh,
(16:00):
we are on this well-worn path where we're doing things only
the way that we've been taught, W
hat we have done is we have allowed ourselves to get into a
fixed mindset where we believe that these things are the
way that they are, a
nd this is the only way it's going to be.
This is who I am.
And this is the only way I'm going to be.
And I, I would, I would call BS on that and Part B, uh,
(16:24):
Louie, this is not who you are,
it is who you have chosen to be again and again and again.
And as a result of that,
you have created this well-worn path that you follow,
and you are a very predictable individual.
We can predict from a human behavior standpoint,
how you're going to react to things,
how you're going to show up,
what's your mindset is when something, uh, challenges you.
(16:47):
Uh,
it's going to be predictable because you're on this well-worn
path, and you've already played your cards.
We already know who's going to show up.
So what,
what I would encourage people to do is understand that
there are so many new possibilities for you in the
universe.
If you just, first of all, uh,
(17:07):
understand that there are over eight billion people on the
planet, they all know something that you don't,
which means that there is an opportunity for you to learn
and for you to grow every day.
For you to get up and be doing things the same old way
every day, following the same pattern, I mean, it's,
it's nothing more than underliving your potential, uh,
(17:30):
underliving the opportunity that God has given you to be a
greater version of yourself than exists today.
That can happen every day, Louie.
If I'm truly moving into a growth mindset where I know that
the best version of me yesterday can be, can be,
can be improved upon today if I am willing to understand
(17:54):
that I don't know what I don't know,
and there's always an opportunity for me to learn something
from Louie, from, from, from the barista at the,
at the Starbucks, I mean,
if I'm open to learning and growing and I listened with the
intent to be influenced,
if I'm reading these books with the intent to be
influenced,
(18:14):
I'm going to learn something from somebody else every
day of my life.
He's dropping golden nuggets and I want to capture a couple
of those before we move on.
One, learning.
I'm a huge advocate.
Mike and I share books and ideas all the time and so
because we're both learners, we're both curious,
you should never ever stop learning because he's absolutely
(18:35):
right.
He said something else, too.
You have the choice.
You're choosing to either stay the same or get out of that
comfort zone.
Another thing he touched on,
Mike has and I've learned a bunch of his acronyms from him
over the years,
but one of his acronyms is IFO (18:49):
I focus on the outcome. A
nd, he created that himself,
but I want you to understand he's talking about what's the
outcome.
That's the same as a goal.
Where are you headed?
Where are you going in your life?
If you know that, if you get clear on where you want to go,
then the rest of us starts to line up, right Mike?
(19:10):
What you want to learn and most importantly,
what I'm passionate about and you light my heart up
brother.
This is just so, it's like recharging me,
but I have a conversation with you,
but when you know where you're going,
what books to read becomes really easy, right?
People ask me what books should I read?
I don't know.
What are you focused on, right?
Where are you headed?
(19:31):
Well, who do you want to be?
Who do you want to be?
Because we get to be whoever we want to be and that's the
magic in that.
So can you again,
I don't want to let go of this culture thing because you're
such a great, when you came into my company,
it changed the game and the mind shifts.
So I'd like you to talk some more about culture on,
(19:51):
and so now that you've got a leader who's focused on
learning and improving every day, who they're going to,
and he said something else, everybody grabbed this.
He said, it could be little steps.
It doesn't matter.
It doesn't need to be quantum leaps.
It could be a little step, but every day, a little step,
a little step,
a little step over time really starts to add up.
(20:13):
So Mike,
how do people transform that into the culture and shift it
into the team?
And I'm passionate about this too, brother,
because I want this to go out for families as much as
organizations and teams and corporations,
because you can't do it in one place and not do it
someplace else.
(20:34):
Absolutely. Absolutely true.
So Louie, I got to say this because, I mean,
you teed this up really nicely.
Unless I have an outcome, I don't know where I'm going.
If I don't have my own North Star,
then I'm playing based upon what's in the rearview mirror,
what I've been taught.
(20:55):
So let me just give you an example of that real quickly.
If I don't have an outcome,
any road will get me to where I'm going.
I don't have a specific destination.
So when I have a outcome,
I have a very specific role that's going to get me there.
(21:16):
I'm going to know the appropriateness of my choices,
if I have an outcome.
I don't even know what's positive and what's negative,
if I don't have an outcome.
I'm only playing by historical data because everything in
this universe, Louie,
and I really want your listeners to get this,
has a positive and a negative context.
(21:37):
Everything in the universe has a positive and a negative
context.
However you have learned it and however you've experienced
it,
that's the way it's stored in your subconscious with a positive
and negative frame around it.
However,
everything in this universe has a positive and a negative.
So I don't even know the appropriateness of my choices.
I don't know positive and negative unless I have a very
(21:58):
specific outcome.
So now that I know where I'm going,
I know what choices are going to get me there.
I know what books I can read that's going to help me get
there.
I know what people I want in my community to surround
myself with.
I mean it allows me to be able to be very definitive about
(22:18):
who I am, what I'm about,
and what you can expect from me in the context of my
outcome.
So now let's get back to the small steps real quick.
Through the process of neuroplasticity,
in order for us to really create sustainable change,
we've got to understand the importance of the power of
(22:40):
repetition.
So if I'm taking small steps to a specific outcome and
getting small wins every day,
then through that process of small steps, small wins,
the power of repetition,
then I am going to create new behaviors.
So I would challenge everybody listening to this to
challenge everything that you've been taught.
(23:02):
So I just want to throw this log on fire real quick, Louie.
If I walk into my business or I walk into my home where my
boys are concerned or my wife, Susan,
and I walk up to one of them, Louie, and I say to you,
I want to give you some feedback.
What they now have is a negative frame around a word that
(23:26):
says you're going to criticize me.
So through the fight or flight mechanism,
they're automatically going to be defensive and absolutely
standoffish because of that one word.
So let me throw another big log on the fire before I go
where I'm going to go.
Words create pictures, and those pictures create emotions,
(23:49):
and then our energy and our action follow our thoughts.
So if you look at the frame that is around the word
feedback,
it's a negative frame that's going to create a negative
picture,
which now is going to put them in a negative space because
their energy and their actions are going to follow their
thought.
Their thought is that's negative.
(24:11):
Does that make sense so far, Louie?
Yes, sir.
I'm tracking with you.
Okay,
so now that we have an awareness around that one word that
we could change from a negative context to a positive
context, it's gonna create a much different picture.
It's gonna create a much different outcome.
(24:31):
It's gonna create a much different energy between those two
people.
So I invented a word,
and I've been using it a lot in the last 33 years,
and I really wanted to catch on, Louie.
I wanted to become a household word.
I wanted to become a cultural foundation for people.
(24:51):
And the word is "feed forward." So when I'm now giving
people feed forward, it changes everything.
So the rearview mirror comes down.
We're not gonna talk about what went wrong or what I don't
want from you.
We're gonna talk about what you need to do moving forward
in order for you to be more successful.
We're gonna paint a picture of where I want you to go,
(25:16):
not where you've been.
People think, Louie, that if I tell you what you did wrong,
then there's a good chance that you're not gonna do that
again.
Well, if you tell me what I did wrong, boss,
I still don't know what to do, right?
I need to interrupt you real quick.
I want you to I want everybody to catch that.
What he just said, boss,
you didn't give me and he's talking about pictures.
(25:36):
The brain works in pictures.
If I give you the word elephant and thanks for letting me
interrupt you, Mike, because this is flipping.
This is the goal, my brother.
This is the vein, right?
You're right there.
You got hair back in my neck standing up, man.
We've got this thing going on.
Our brain works in pictures.
And so if you're giving somebody feedback,
you're showing the picture of what was behind you,
his rear, Mike's rearview mirror theory,
(25:58):
care that bad boy off and throw it away.
But their picture that you're continuing to reinforce is
the negative that happened behind them.
You've got to show them the picture of what that outcome
is.
Where do you want them to go?
Give them I'm sorry to interrupt you, but go on.
I just I could let that go by.
That's beautiful, man,
and that's exactly what I'm just committed to do, man.
(26:20):
I am focused and committed to changing the world, Louie,
and it starts with you and me.
I mean, I can just do it two people at a time,
that that's perfectly okay,
because every one of those individuals are going to touch
somebody else.
I just want to focus on doing it two people at a time,
you and me.
So whoever's listening to this, they benefit from it,
(26:43):
that's great, but right now,
this is just about you and me right now, mano a mano,
one-on-one.
So now that I am communicating what I want them to do,
what I want you to observe when you embrace this is that
it's going to speed up the transaction.
It's going to develop more receptivity in the relationship.
(27:06):
They're going to be willing to take more risk.
So they're going to be more innovative.
They're going to be more resilient when we start managing
people like this and managing ourselves like this as well,
Louie.
So rather than me focusing on what went wrong,
if I now can get my mind skipped 180 degrees and focus on
(27:29):
what's going right, first of all,
I can celebrate that and I should,
but I'm doing a high five, baby, and I should.
And in addition to that,
I am now going to be in a much different energy moving
forward that's going to be a positive energy than over here
licking my wounds in a negative energy based upon the fact
(27:51):
that I did something wrong and I got beat up for it.
Again, man, you're on fire, Mike.
So again, listeners,
there's a couple of things I want to make sure you catch
this with what Mike's talking about.
One is he's talked about choices.
The other thing he said is every choice you make is going
to either lead to a negative or a positive.
And I love to tell people there's no fence straddling,
(28:12):
right?
Mike,
you can't stand in the middle of the road thinking it's
going to be okay.
Cause you're not doing anything, right?
It's going to go one way or the other,
but you're making these choices that are positive or
negative.
And I want you to know,
I want to touch on something else that Mike just said,
that's really near and dear to my heart.
We all have the power to change the world.
We all do.
And it's not some monumentous thing.
(28:32):
It's every day with your interaction with people, and Mike,
you hit that nail in the head,
and I want to share with the audience to this day,
I still use feed forward.
As a matter of fact, I sent out an email, Mike,
and you're on that email that I sent out today,
asking people to help me with the podcast and get it out.
And I asked them for feed forward.
And, and this is what I want all the listeners.
(28:54):
I want you all to grasp this.
I believe we're not supposed to know the full impact of our
downstream.
Mike,
you've impacted literally tens of tens of thousands of
lives.
And Mike said something that I think every leader needs to
realize.
If you only impact one person,
you have no idea how many lives they touch.
(29:16):
So you got to be the best you all the time with everybody,
because you don't know how far down it goes.
And I believe God gave us that on purpose, right?
If you knew how the impact you've had, Mike,
you couldn't get your head out the door.
And that's, and that's why God keeps us separate from that.
And I trust that whatever it is,
it's going to be what it's supposed to be.
Right.
That's that,
that's that faith and belief in what we're doing is, is,
(29:38):
is positive.
And so again, I don't,
I want the listeners to catch the importance of your
decisions headed in to a specific outcome and then what
those, those effects are having on other people, Mike,
I'd like to talk about at this point,
how do you tie culture to that vision of purpose in,
(29:59):
in making a difference?
One of the things I share with people,
I really believe our business,
whether you own a business or work in a business,
that's our spiritual practice.
I'd love to hear your thoughts on,
on how you tie the culture and the purpose or the vision
for the company or the organization or the family, right?
A lot of families don't have a vision of,
of who they want to be, how they want to be.
(30:19):
So can you talk about that, please?
Yeah, and you know, Lou, when you talk about culture,
we've had an opportunity to do some great work with some
great organizations and great teams that really were on
that well-worn path of doing things the way,
whatever best practices they have connected to.
(30:44):
And the first thing I like to do when I walk in the door is
tell them, Discover Leadership Training,
we're not focused on best practices.
We're focused on you creating the next practice.
So when you create the next practice,
it's because you set a specific outcome,
you've taken the human beings that are in this building,
this human dynamic which does not exist anywhere else on
(31:05):
the planet,
and you are absolutely utilizing all of the potential of
these people in the building to get to your specific
outcome.
So if I'm following somebody else's process,
I may be underliving my potential and my whole team may be
underliving their potential.
If we now create the outcome that we want,
(31:28):
whether it seems lofty or not is not what's important.
What's important over the course of time is how they play
the game.
So I am going to continually only address them when they
are playing the game in the appropriate manner that's gonna
(31:49):
get us to our outcome.
Those are the things that I'm gonna address.
So let me just throw this on there, Louie,
because this is where you're gonna think, okay,
I knew Mike Jones is crazy.
I never told my boys,
never told my boys that they were gifted,
that they were talented, that they were somehow special,
because all of those things will create a fixed mindset
(32:11):
where an individual does not realize that they've got to
work for what they want.
What I taught my boys was to have a great work ethic.
I only addressed them when they put in the effort.
I only addressed the effort.
The reason that you got that A on that test, bro,
(32:32):
is because you studied your butt off of that.
And so I'm now giving the dog a bone for what I want the
dog to continue doing,
because if you give a dog a bone for shitting in the middle
of the floor, Louie,
he gonna keep shitting in the middle of the floor.
Whatever you're rewarding is what the people are gonna do.
So if I'm in my business now,
and I know that we have set a specific outcome,
(32:52):
like we have KPIs and we wanna hit these numbers every
month,
I'm not going to judge them based upon whether or not we
hit that KPI or not.
I'm gonna judge them on how they played the game,
because there are gonna be circumstances and stuff that's
gonna happen that none of us have any control over.
The question is,
how did we come together as a team in those moments that
(33:14):
circumstances occurred that we didn't have any control over
and come together and synergistically deal with whatever it
was?
Not blaming, not advocating,
but coming together and doing everything that we can as a
team, as a unit that never says, that's not my job.
That never says that I got this much tenure,
(33:40):
so I'm the brain of the business or whatever.
There's opportunity for everybody to learn and everybody to
grow.
And what I'm gonna focus on is how they're playing the
game.
The things that I'm gonna address is how they're playing
the game.
And that is the one thing that we control.
(34:00):
That's the one thing that we can grow.
I mean,
every day and get better and absolutely make sure that they
get rewarded for how they're playing the game and not for
necessarily hitting outcomes.
So one of the one of Mike's catchphrases is a game changer.
He uses that in some of his trainings.
And I can tell you that what he was just talking about is
(34:22):
just that, right?
That's how you change the game is hold your focus on what
they're doing.
Right?
Not not.
And I love, I love to tell people manage by walking around,
right?
Go find people doing stuff, right?
Go find them playing the game the way you want them playing
the game.
Don't worry.
There's a lot of leaders that will wander around and
they're nitpicking things or they're jumping down people's
throats for what they're doing wrong or what.
(34:43):
And again,
that picture is completely different than where you're,
they want the outcome to go.
You touched on something, Mike,
that I don't want to gloss over.
And I want you to help the audience understand.
You said something very powerful about the team's
potential.
I'd like you to talk about how you,
when you go into companies and even one-on-one,
(35:05):
like you've done with me and other people,
what's your thoughts and advice on how do you get the
potential out of your people?
And what do you use to determine whether they're,
they should stay on the team or you need,
they need to go find another team?
Because you said another thing that is a truly golden
nugget.
Every team, every team is unique, right?
(35:26):
There are no two teams alike.
And again, Mike's Mike's telling you, here's another thing.
Mike's been saying, he's got a theme through this,
everybody.
One of the things he's saying is break out of the box.
Whatever you thought is the paradigm, that's the truth.
Tear it all down and start again,
because your team is like no other team.
And so your rules, your structure,
(35:46):
all the things that you think should be might be completely
different to get that maximum potential.
But Mike,
can you talk about how to get the most out of your people
for their potential and then also determine who should or
shouldn't be on your team?
Oh, yeah.
Oh, I mean, what a beautiful topic to me.
The one thing that we teach when we're working with a team
(36:08):
is we teach the leadership to start managing promises and
not expectations.
So when we're managing our expectations,
that's all historical stuff.
That's rearview mirror stuff.
And when we now start managing and you talk about here,
we could come back to personal responsibility,
we start managing promises,
(36:30):
we now have a much different culture,
a much different game that we're playing.
Because now I've come to you, Louie,
I've told you exactly what I need from you.
I've absolutely made sure that you can deliver that.
And if not, and then I'm going to teach you how to,
I'm not just going to tell you,
(36:50):
I'm going to I'm going to tell you, I'm going to show you,
then I'm gonna have you tell me and then you show me,
I'm going to make sure that you know exactly how to deliver
that.
Before I take my hands off of it,
and I am going to gain an agreement from you.
This is so important.
So important.
I'm going to gain an agreement from you that we're going to
(37:10):
deliver this at this level by this date.
So and once I have that that commitment and that agreement,
I can now manage that promise in game that that's got to be
really important.
I'm going to manage it in game and make sure that we are
successful because I am on your team.
(37:31):
I'm not going to just give you this and walk away and come
back in 30 days at the end of the deadline to see if you've
accomplished it or you have not.
I am never going to take my hand off of it.
People say that that's called micromanaging.
I disagree completely.
I am here to help manage this in game.
So I can give you adabars, kudos, high fives,
(37:53):
pats on the back, whatever you need a hug,
or whatever you need to keep doing that that way.
I'm going to keep encouraging you that you're doing the
right thing.
You're doing it the right way.
Or if you get off step a little bit,
I'm going to help manage that in game.
I'm not going to wait for you to fail and then jump all
(38:14):
over you at the end.
We're going to have a relationship that is a collaborative
relationship.
That's a two-way street that you can give and take with me
along this journey as we build this culture together.
So everybody, I want you to again, he, he, he's dropping,
he's not dropping little nuggets,
(38:35):
he's dropping boulders of gold.
So one of the things Mike just said is he's very clear and
very specific on what that outcome is that he wants that
perfect specific team member to have.
And then before he holds them accountable,
he's training them, teaching them, coaching them,
mentoring them,
(38:55):
all the things good leaders do to get them to,
and then he said something very important.
They tell him back how to do it, and they show him.
So he's got clear understanding.
There's no breakdown in that communication.
It's crystal clear what the outcome, the FOMO, right?
What am I focusing on?
(39:17):
And then he trains that to agreement because once you have
agreement,
then you know that you can kind of take your hands off the
wheel enough to audit or monitor them because you don't,
you're right, Mike, you don't walk away.
You don't lead by dropping it on them and then walking away
thinking it's just all going to be magic and it's all going
to go down the way you want it to.
(39:39):
I think that, and again,
I want everybody to know Mike has modeled this in my
relationship with him for,
I don't know how long we've known each other, Mike,
maybe a decade at this point, but he,
and I'm telling you in 10 years, he has not failed,
he has not failed to answer the phone or call me back and
hold that up and that's those promises he's talking about.
(40:00):
And again,
he keeps bringing back to personal responsibility.
Mike, I'd like to go a little bit further.
Can you talk about at some point now that you've done this
training, you've,
you've got somebody that you can hold accountable, but you,
you, you're walking the path with them, right?
I love that, that now that picture comes to my, my mind,
you're walking the path with them at what point,
how do you,
(40:21):
you coach and mentor leaders at what point do you decide,
you know, they need to move to another team.
They don't, it is not a good fit for our team.
Right.
And you know, I love the question.
I'm sorry, I didn't address it a moment ago.
But Louie, when when you are managing individuals,
by promises and not by expectations,
what ultimately happens is it speeds up the transaction for
(40:44):
you to know that this is the right person on my team or
not,
because you're going to be able to definitively see that
this person has integrity with themselves,
or they don't have integrity with themselves.
So if I'm building a culture based on trust,
and I know that if I'm managing my promise, at some point,
I'm going to be able to allow that person to be completely
(41:08):
autonomous for me, and not have to check on at all,
because we're going to have build a trusting relationship
that we know that they're going to play fall out every day
that they're going to deliver at a high level every day.
And I no longer need to give attention or energy to that
particular person,
I cannot go and do something else with with that time that
(41:30):
I got back.
Because I now know,
I'm not assuming I know that this person is a right person
for my team, based upon how they play the game.
And I can easily determine who's not a good fit for that,
based on how they're playing the game.
So they've made promises to me,
they've been shown exactly how things need to be done at
(41:53):
the level that they need to be done.
However, they refuse to do things at that level,
then they're definitely not going to be a good fit for my
team.
I love that, and I've heard the analogy.
I love your thoughts on it.
As soon as it crosses your mind that they're not a good
fit, you should let them go.
Do you agree with that?
(42:14):
Absolutely, absolutely. I
was talking to a leader yesterday, Louie, that I said,
I've been coaching you to cut ties with this person for
about six months now.
And soon as you do it, you're gonna say,
I wish I had done that sooner.
And that's exactly what he said yesterday.
I wish I had listened to you.
I wish I had done that sooner.
(42:34):
Now I've got a bigger mess to clean up than I would have
had six months ago.
And I love what you said, as soon as it crosses your mind,
that this is not a good fit for my team.
It's not a good fit for your team.
And you need to do something about it.
One of the things I was in an organization when I would,
I would go into a networking chapters.
And one of the things that blew me away, Mike, was,
and I like, and like you speak to this,
(42:56):
because I'm sure you've had much more experience than I
have, but it was,
it was unbelievable to me how one bad apple,
one person in a chapter of 15, 20, 30 winners would,
they could suck the whole, that whole chapter down.
Could you talk to about that a little bit and why it's so
important to get that apple out sooner than later?
Absolutely. So, so, so, Louie,
(43:16):
you know you right in my wheelhouse right now,
because I know we all grew up playing sports and people
taught us that there's no I in team.
One of the things that we teach to Discover Leadership T
raining is that there is absolutely an I in team because
every person matters.
Every person is going to affect this culture,
(43:37):
this environment,
this family or whatever the case may be either positively
or negatively.
There is absolutely no neutral in the context of this.
So for me to have my team at work performing and producing
the optimal outcome,
then everybody's got to be on board and doing their job.
(43:58):
It would only take one of them, Louie,
to be that bad apple or not performing at that same high
level for us to now have some total, S-U-M-T-O-T-A-L.
So if we want optimal,
everybody's got to be accepting person responsibility to be
the I in team,
to deliver at the quality and at the speed and whatever
(44:21):
that we have agreed upon.
It would only take one of them in order to throw a wrench
in that for us to end up with sum total and not optimal.
Only one.
Uh, yeah, I love that Mike,
and it's really powerful because I think people tolerate,
especially in the, in the market today,
I don't understand why,
(44:41):
but they tolerate things because they think, well,
I can't replace this person.
You can't afford not to replace that person, right?
They could suck the rest of the team down faster than you
can whistle Dixie.
And then, and like, like the leader you were just coaching,
then you got a real mess on your hands because,
and here's the thing that I've,
and I like to like you to talk about this a little bit too,
(45:02):
because, and again, we could do this for hours,
but I'd like you to talk about the,
what does it do to the team when you let that one bad apple
stray off of our core values,
off a personal responsibility, what happens?
Yeah,
so one of the things that you're doing as a leader when you
allow that, Louie,
(45:22):
you are damaging the trust as it relates to this team.
You are also setting a precedence that it's okay to operate
at this level and still have a job and still get paid.
And that allowing that in the culture is going to bring the
quality of the whole thing down because now you have now
(45:44):
given other people permission to behave in the exact same
way.
You cannot confront them if you're not going to confront
that.
The more you confront that, what I have learned over time,
Louie, it brings a level of trust up.
It brings a level of receptivity and synergy up on the team
because they now know that this is not going to be
(46:04):
tolerated in this culture.
We only are going to play based upon our promises.
And when that culture is one that is being managed by
promises and not expectations,
you are absolutely going to see people behave way
differently than they are normally in the traditional
environment.
(46:25):
So this is really rich, Mike.
So that leads me to another question.
So I would love to hear your thoughts and advice to leaders
on how do they have that hard conversation?
A lot of people are afraid of confrontation,
or to your point earlier, you know,
if you were to say something like,
and you mentioned this before we started recording about
(46:45):
constructive criticism, right?
But how do you coach people on how to have those difficult
conversations and confront the issue to stop that and not
tolerate it right now?
Yeah, and Louie,
when you are managing promises versus expectations,
when you have a culture that is focused on giving people
feed forward in game,
(47:07):
there really are no tough conversations because you've now
developed a relationship that has trust in it,
that whatever conversation needs to happen is going to
happen and is not gonna be a whole lot of negativity
involved in it, if any.
But the one thing that we really gotta sell here is that
(47:27):
when I'm giving people feed forward consistently,
they are now going to be seeking out my observation.
They're gonna be seeking out my commentary.
They're gonna be seeking out.
They're not gonna be running from it.
They're not gonna be hiding it.
They see me show up because I'm a command and control
leader.
They put their heads down.
(47:48):
They don't wanna hear anything from me.
But when I now am the leader who's walking around,
you're catching people doing things right,
rather than catching them doing things wrong,
then they are gonna be more receptive to everything that I
have to say.
And those tough conversations are no longer tough
conversations.
They are just normal conversations in the context of this.
(48:10):
So again, everybody save this, replay it.
He just another, another huge piece of wisdom.
And he's talking about the communication, right?
He's talking about that communication that's gone on the
entire time with the team, with the family,
so it's really clear where we're heading,
how we're playing the game, who we're busy being,
and how we're going to get to where we all mutually want to
(48:32):
go.
So at that point,
it's really easy to have that conversation because it's not
like you haven't been communicating with these people.
And that's difficult, isn't it, Mike?
When,
when you don't communicate regularly and then out of the,
and to them,
it seems like you come out of the blue and you're dropping
the hammer and they're like, Oh, I had no idea.
If you,
if you're delivering a message and they have no idea,
your communication skills suck.
(48:53):
You need to work on that, right?
Take personal responsibility for how,
how you're communicating gives, because they should,
they should,
they should be telegraphed to them on a regular basis.
And again, I love that you're,
you keep going back to personal responsibility and the
positive, how can they spin this to the positive?
Yeah, I just want to say this real quick.
It is important,
(49:15):
because I know a lot of folks will resonate with this,
to give the feed forward in game.
If you're one of those people,
and I know a lot of people listening to this will
definitely resonate with this,
that allows whatever's going on to just marinate and stew
and simmer until you get to a point that you're angry or
(49:37):
frustrated, it's not going to come out positive.
It's not going to come out in a way that anybody is going
to be receptive to it.
So if you're now doing this in game,
when you see it say something,
when you see that they're not doing it the way that they
need to be doing,
give them the feed forward in that moment so that they will
(49:58):
know how to do it and what you want them to do,
not what you don't want them to do, or what not to do.
Yeah, that very powerful Mike,
and I'd like to share that with the audience.
What Mike's talking about is again this the power of
positive communication.
And one of the things that I like to, and I learned this,
I forget where I learned it from, but it doesn't matter,
(50:19):
is start with a what question, not a why question, right?
To your point earlier, you asked somebody a why question,
they instantly start to back up and that's at the fight or
flight, right?
Why did you, and instead of asking, hey, what went on,
what happened?
Completely different kind of frame of mind and we're
looking at what happened, not why did you do something?
Very powerful.
(50:40):
Mike, I really appreciate this.
Is there anything you'd like to add or something you wanted
that's on your heart that you'd like to share with the
audience?
Yeah,
and what I would like to say is what I really feel like
will be very beneficial to everybody that's listening to
this.
And that is,
(51:01):
I really want you to examine how you start your day.
So if you're a snooze button hitter,
I want you to be aware that you're in a negative mindset.
When you do that,
you're having a negative conversation with yourself.
You're creating all of this negative energy around
yourself, and you haven't even gotten out of the bed yet.
(51:21):
So you've already started your day in a negative way.
Those of you all that are multiple snooze button hitters,
oh my god.
Think about how much negativity you've created for
yourself, and you haven't even gotten out of your bed yet.
So,
I like to suggest to people that they take their phone or
their alarm clock and move it across the room.
(51:41):
Because we're not talking about motivation anymore, Louie,
we're talking about self-discipline.
I say the more and more you build that self-discipline
muscle,
you'll be motivated to continue doing whatever it is that
you need to do.
But it's not about needing more motivation or willpower.
It's about self-discipline.
So if I now made a commitment to myself that when that
(52:02):
alarm goes off, I'm going to get up,
I'm already working that self-discipline muscle and making
it stronger.
Because I did what I said I was going to do.
I'm accepting personal responsibility for that.
So now that I'm up, what I would suggest to people, Louie,
is don't go turn on CNN or Fox.
You already know that's going to be negative.
Don't go get your morning newspaper out the driveway and
(52:23):
sit down with a cup of coffee and start reading that.
Don't let that be the first thing that you ingest into your
spirit.
So like Louie does,
and I know he does it because we talk about this,
is the second thing that I want you to do once you get up
is read something positive.
I mean,
there are millions of websites out there on the internet
(52:44):
that have positive inspirational messages.
You can send us a message at Discover Leadership Training.
We'll send you one of our books that has 365 Positive M
essages in.
But read something positive.
Start your day by reading something positive.
For those of y'all that are really spiritual people,
is that your Bible, whatever,
just make a commitment to read something positive.
(53:07):
And then once you have started your day like that,
I want you to observe the difference that it makes for your
entire day in everything that you got to deal with all day
long.
Mike, I love that, so that leads me,
I brought my book today, 365 Powerful Messages,
(53:27):
and I want people that are watching,
you can see that this thing's dog-eared.
I'm actually on my fourth time through it,
so this is a year of positive messages.
This is a book Mike wrote, and not only is it, and Mike,
this just occurred to me literally in the moment,
but I have my card from Discover Leadership,
that's my bookmark in your book.
And for those of you that can't see it, again,
(53:49):
this is a God moment,
the hair on the back of my neck standing up, but it says,
I am worthy, and I read this, I am worthy,
I choose to believe in myself,
I matter in everything that I do,
and I'm committed to love and respect myself,
I will create a better version of myself, I am worthy.
And I read that when I read your page for the day.
And so, what he's talking about is very powerful,
(54:11):
and it's as simple as getting a book.
Now, Mike, before,
I want people to know how to be able to get in touch with
you, but I'd like to publicly relate right now, thank you,
because this just came up to me in the moment.
And it touches me, I'm sorry, it moves my heart, brother.
I would not be doing this podcast had I not gone through
Discover Leadership.
I mean that, and that light just went off right now.
(54:35):
I went through those fears, am I good enough?
Who the hell am I to be leading a podcast?
Who am I to talk about love?
Who am I to talk about leadership?
But to your point, I got out of that,
I let those beliefs go and thought, I'm gonna go do this,
and I just took those little steps and bam, here we are.
But I can tell you that the impetus of that came from the
(54:55):
four days I spent with you for Discover Leadership.
And so, I'd love for you to tell people now,
and now I wanna be clear,
Mike's got a program called Discover Leadership,
and the only way,
the only way that you can get in is to be nominated.
He doesn't take every chuckle head off the street.
And one of the reasons why he doesn't is because you have
(55:15):
to commit.
You have a conversation, even after you're nominated,
you have a conversation with Mr.
Mike Jones himself,
because he wants to know how committed you are to making a
change in your life, to live in the life of your dreams,
to focus on your outcomes, to be the best version of you.
So,
and his success rate is very high because he's got a screening
process that only takes the people that really wanna change
(55:36):
the game, the game changers.
So, I'm gonna tell everybody listening in the audience,
if you'd like to get into Discover Leadership,
reach out to me personally,
and I will nominate you to Mike Jones personally,
and Mike Jones and I have both a professional and personal
relationship,
but I will nominate you personally to get into Discover
Leadership because otherwise you can't get in.
You can contact Mike for books,
(55:58):
have him come to speak at your organization or an event,
but he will not let you into Discover Leadership without a
nomination, and trust me, I love him,
and it's people that have gone through it.
My team members, other people, friends that I've known,
Mike Anderson, a mutual friend of ours,
refers tons of people in the collision industry, but again,
if you want that nomination, please reach out to me,
(56:19):
I'll be happy to make that happen, but Mike,
how can people get ahold of you and what are some of the
other things that you offer that you can help them with?
Yeah, for sure, Louie.
They can contact us through the website at
discoverleadership.com.
Send me a message there.
I love just, you know,
connecting with people and kind of talking through their
(56:41):
stories.
I love hearing people's stories.
We will offer coaching to people that are graduates of our
program and people that aren't.
I mean, so if they need anything from us,
we know that there's like 8 billion people on the planet.
We're not going to touch every last one of them,
but we want to touch as many of them as we possibly can.
(57:03):
They can join my Facebook page.
It's a public page.
So and follow us there.
We drop a Hump Day Wisdom,
which is an article every Wednesday.
And they can make it.
They can see it on that Facebook page.
Mike Jones, Discover Leadership Training.
And yeah, we would just love to connect with them so.
(57:26):
Well, Mike, thank you very much.
I highly recommend that you reach out to Mike,
as you can hear and see easily.
He's just a wealth of wisdom and knowledge.
And I can tell you that Mike Jones is living what he's
talking about because we didn't pre-emphasis with any
specific questions.
We let it be organic, and it went where it went.
(57:46):
So these are the kind of people you wanna seek out in your
life that will help you change your life.
And trust me when I tell you,
Mike Jones is a man that does that every day.
So Mike, I love you brother.
Thanks for taking the time and what a true joy.
And I'd like to invite you in the future,
we'll do this again because we just,
you're like the iceberg, right?
We just hit the tip of your iceberg, brother,
(58:08):
underneath the water,
there's just a whole mass of stuff you still know.
Absolutely, man.
Thank you, Louie, for allowing me to do this.
I'm honored, humbled by your friendship and your love.
And I love you.
I love you as well, my brother.
Absolutely.
Thanks again for joining us and listening to this episode
of Leadership and Love.
I would like to challenge you to ask yourself what's one
(58:31):
thing that you heard today that you can implement
immediately to improve your leadership and accelerate your
growth.
If you've gotten value out of this episode or learned
something that you can implement today,
we'd ask that you please share it with those that you care
about.
Our goal is to create more leaders who are leading with
(58:51):
love.
Welcome to the Leadership and Love Podcast.
We will cover leadership, mindset, personal development,
and sales and marketing.
You'll experience thought-provoking conversations with both
nationally and internationally recognized leaders.
Our goal is to inspire you and deliver actionable items
that you can implement that will help you accelerate your
(00:22):
growth.
Get ready to discover the magic and the power when you lead
with love.
Welcome back, everybody,
to another episode of Leadership and Love.
Today,
I'm truly humbled and excited for a dear friend of mine,
a mentor,
(00:42):
and a coach that has been in my life for quite a while now,
Mr.
Mike Jones.
Mike Jones is the owner and CEO of Discover Leadership.
And we're going to talk a little bit about that and what
his company does in a little bit.
But I'd like to give you a little bit of a background on
where he came from.
And then I'll turn it over to you, Mike,
to fill in the blanks and the spaces.
(01:04):
But at one point, I met Mike at an event.
And I kind of rolled my eyes at him.
And he said, he knew what crossed my mind.
And I thought, you know, at the time,
I was younger than I am today, obviously.
And I was a little cocky and thought, well, yeah,
what's this guy going to teach me?
Well,
I was in for a rude awakening because he's taught me just a
(01:26):
wealth of information around leadership and a bunch of
other things.
But I want you to know, at one point,
he was a helicopter pilot for the police department in
Texas.
And he's morphed and left that.
And he had a career before that as well.
So he's done a number of things in his life.
But then he came to this thing called Discover Leadership
(01:47):
through his own personal growth and personal journey.
And he's really sharing it with the world.
And trust me when I tell you,
this is a man who changes lives.
This is also a man who lives with the highest level of
integrity that I've ever known.
And I mean that sincerely.
He says, when he's on your team, he means it.
There's times I've called Mike and said, hey, Mike,
(02:08):
I need help.
And he takes the call or he'll call back as soon as
possible.
And he gives me wisdom,
advice and counsel on how to guide myself through whatever
challenge I'm in the middle of.
So Mike, thanks for being here.
And please fill in any of the blanks that I might have left
out.
No, Louie, thank you for having me man.
I just feel honored to be a part of the gifted leadership
(02:32):
and on this incredible podcast that you've launched and
being able to be a part of the genesis of this is really
important to me, and I feel honored for the opportunity.
So thank you.
You're quite welcome.
One of the first things I wanna talk to you about, Mike,
that I think I've never seen anybody do a better job of
this than you.
(02:53):
How would you suggest to our listeners that they deliver a
message?
You deliver hard messages.
Now, I wanna be clear with the audience.
I'm not talking about mean messages or cruel or heartless.
I'm talking about you deliver hard messages with tact and
(03:14):
love.
And you tell people, one of your sayings,
and I'm gonna cover a bunch of your stuff today that I
learned from you.
Well, one of the things you say is,
the sweetest fruit is out in the skinny branches.
But one of the things that you help people understand is
personal responsibility.
And when I brought you into my company for some leadership
training,
one of the first things we talked about was core values and
(03:36):
that's where you went.
So can you please explain to the audience how when you're
delivering a hard message,
how do you deliver it in such a way that it lands and
people aren't offended?
Yeah, well, you know, Louie,
the first thing that we all have to truly just embrace is
the fact that this is not a dress rehearsal,
as far as we know it this life that we have right now is
(03:58):
the only one that we're going to get.
So I like to tell people,
we don't have enough life left to be beaten around the bush
or blowing smoke up people's behinds,
playing politics or behave in a certain way because
somebody's got paper on the wall from the university.
I mean,
the truth is the only thing that's going to get us to a
(04:20):
better place.
Now, I know, you know,
I grew up in church down south down here and in church,
they taught us that the truth will set you free.
But what I've learned in my practice over these 33 years
that I've been doing this, Louie,
as it relates to the things that we have learned,
the things that we have been taught and the things that we
(04:41):
have experienced in our life,
those things that have allowed us to create the self image
of ourselves that we have,
the messages that other people have given us that have
created these identities that we have.
To remain in that truth is what I like to refer to as
(05:04):
imprisonment, because that imprisons you.
So absence of that truth, you know,
if you grew up and somebody told you that you were
worthless or that you would never amount to something or
that you can't do something, that that truth imprisons you.
So absence of that truth is freedom because the truth is
(05:26):
when you come through one of our programs,
we are not going to be looking back at what happened.
We've taken a rearview mirror down.
We're talking about what's available to you right now in
the context of this conversation,
which means everything is available to you.
There is abundance in this universe.
There is not scarcity.
(05:47):
So whatever you want,
if you have the courage to step inside of it,
it's available to you.
And when you meet people like Louie Sharp or you get a
chance to come through Discover Leadership Training,
you have those types of people in your life,
they are going to absolutely require you to step up to
another level in order to be a part of that community.
(06:14):
Absolutely get to the best version of yourself that's
available.
So for me, Louie,
I learned a long time ago that the straightest path to
something is straight to it, not going around it.
So when I am communicating with people,
I like to go right to the point.
I don't care what your title is,
how much paper you got in on the wall from university.
(06:37):
Every last one of us occupies the largest room in the
house, which is a room for improvement.
So if you are open to some new possibilities of somebody
talking to you about things that are in your blind spot
that you may not even be able to see,
then Mike Jones is your guy because I don't have a problem
going that way too soon.
(06:58):
So,
so for those of you listening or who you could be watching
as well.
So Mike just might, and he's, I trust me, you want to,
you want to earmark this bad boy, copy and paste it,
but you're going to listen to this thing over and over
because Mike's going to drop golden nuggets for,
through our whole conversation.
And Mike and I could talk about this for days,
but couple of things he just said,
I want you to understand that everything that we've been
(07:21):
told is a belief and a belief is only a thought that you
think over and over and over.
And so I want you to grab what Mike said here,
and I want you to challenge every thought that you think
about yourself, because none of it's the truth.
You get to pick what your truth is.
Mike,
you also touched on something and I'd like you to go back
(07:41):
for a minute, if you would,
and talk about personal responsibility,
because that's really the core of where you start your
programs and your training to help people start to move the
needle.
And you know, Louie, I have four biological sons,
and everything that I have ever done through my leadership
training was absolutely tested on them.
(08:01):
So they were my lab rats.
So as a kid growing up, I lived under, like most kids do,
a command and control environment where mom was, I mean,
she was a single parent, and she was the shit,
she was the boss.
I mean,
and if you question why she was asking you to do something,
(08:23):
the only response that quite often you was going to get is
because I said so.
And what I learned through that process when I had children
of my own was that I wanted to really put them on a journey
to go from dependent to independent.
And I knew that the one thing that they owned in this
(08:43):
universe that, I mean,
nobody could ever take away from them was their word.
So what I started doing with them is I started getting them
to make commitments to very specific things like cleaning a
room or taking out the garbage or washing the dishes.
We made commitments to things.
And what I taught them through that process was that your
(09:06):
word is the only thing that you own.
So when you accept personal responsibility to own it,
it absolutely is going to develop you into a individual who
people can count on.
You know,
there's a whole lot of assumptive trust in the world,
Louie.
People tell us that we should trust people indiscriminately
until they give us a reason not to.
(09:26):
If anybody's listening to that and you live in your life by
that, I'm gonna tell you, bro,
the one thing that you can depend on is that there's gonna
be some disappointment in your future if you keep managing
your relationships like that.
The most authentic trust in the universe is when I tell
Louie Sharp that I'm gonna do something and I am personally
responsible for my word and I do it.
(09:48):
The more and more I build that kind of a relationship,
what we're talking about in my business or in my home,
then there is gonna be trust in that relationship.
And when people have that kind of trust in their
relationship, Louie,
you will play this game differently when you know who has
your back.
So we go into businesses all the time, Louie,
and they wanna talk about core values.
(10:09):
In fact,
most of them have had individuals that have come in,
consultants that have come in,
and they've gone through this process of writing a mission,
vision statement, coming up with core values.
I mean, they have it printed on the walls.
They got it on the plaque cards in the elevator.
They printed it on business cards,
and they've given it to people.
I challenge you right now, if you're listening to this,
(10:32):
if y'all have core values,
I challenge you to look on that card or on that wall and
tell me if personal responsibility is one of the things
that is there because quite often it's not, Louie.
And that's why we have all of these different measures of
levels of management is because people have to be managed
(10:52):
to the outcome.
They are not committed to it because they're not accepting
personal responsibility.
The one thing I challenge you to do, Louie,
you look at the things that are on that core value list,
like integrity, accountability.
Let's definitely go there.
Whatever those things are,
what I want you to observe is that unless personal
(11:16):
responsibility shows up,
none of those things are gonna show up.
And I put accountability in there, Louie,
because a lot of people think that accountability and
personal responsibility are the same.
I am absolutely here to tell you today that they are not
the same.
If I am holding you accountable, however,
I am not accepting personal responsibility,
(11:39):
let's call that blame.
If I'm holding you accountable,
but I'm not accepting personal responsibility,
there's no personal responsibility in this relationship,
that's called blame.
So unless personal responsibility shows up,
you are not gonna get people to extreme ownership of their
position, their roles, and their responsibility.
When personal responsibility shows up,
(12:01):
you will absolutely get them to ownership and extreme
ownership, where you can take your hands off of it,
give them the resources and the authority to do their job,
and they will do their job.
They will not need to be managed because they will be self
-managed.
Boy, I can tell you Mike,
if people just got what you just said,
(12:22):
this whole thing is going to be worthwhile.
And so again, for those of you listening or watching,
I want you to understand that what Mike just said,
it's the foundation of what makes everything work.
It starts with you.
You can't, and I love that you're blaming Mike, you know,
if you're holding somebody accountable,
you're really blaming them because you're not holding up
your end of it.
And I want to repeat something I said about Mike earlier.
(12:44):
I can tell you that he's, he walks the walk.
When I call him or I need something and he said,
I'm on your team, he's never ever, never ever.
And here's what I want to talk about the emotional bank
account a little bit, but he's always been there.
And so he's living what he's talking about because it's
that critical.
And I want you to understand that he's talking about a word
(13:06):
called freedom.
We all want freedom,
but we don't want to do the work to pay for that freedom
and personal responsibility.
And this is what I'm talking about.
Mike, nobody does this better than you.
You deliver this message with such passion and enthusiasm,
but also with the love in your, in your heart.
And I,
and that's why it lands and you have such a big effect in
people's lives.
I'd like you to talk now,
(13:27):
like a kind of transition into that.
I know you've done a bunch of research,
you study and for those of you,
I didn't mention at the beginning of the program.
Mike's a nationally renowned speaker.
He goes into large and small companies and organizations,
literally across the country,
as well as having his own programs.
So Mike, I'd like you to talk about how to,
how to take that personal responsibility and those core
(13:49):
values because they are, are critical,
but you're absolutely right.
The core values don't hold up without that foundation of
personal responsibility.
What do you share with, with organizations,
teams about how to shift or move their culture?
Yeah, and you know, we, we, we as human beings, uh, uh,
on this well-worn path where, uh,
(14:12):
we've been taught what we should do and what we shouldn't
do.
And we go through our entire lives shouldn't all over
ourselves.
I mean,
focus on doing things the way that we've been taught to do
them.
And they seem like they,
that they're the right things to do.
Uh,
the only way for us to identify what's right for me or what's
(14:34):
right for Louie is we have to know what our specific
outcome is.
So if my outcome is to create a better version of myself,
then this is an inside job that only I can do.
It is a, it's an inside job that only I, uh,
can make a commitment to and be personal responsibility,
(14:55):
be responsible for taking some small steps and getting
small wins.
So, and where I want to go with that just for a second,
Louie, if I can,
is that when we're on this well-worn path of doing things
the way that we've been taught,
a part of this human universal paradigm, uh, where,
where we're, we're following, uh, some traditions.
(15:18):
I normally get myself in trouble with that one, but,
but I'm not going to go anywhere, I'm going to go anywhere,
but we're following specific traditions.
And traditions for me, Louie, are the beliefs of the dead.
They are truly the beliefs of the dead and traditional
lisms are the dead beliefs of the living.
So we have taken on these beliefs, uh,
(15:40):
and we've not challenged them, uh, to, uh,
to the extent that we can do something even better than
what somebody else has done, uh, and I,
I know I'm making myself in trouble,
so let me just go on and say it.
When we're living according to the human universal
paradigm, uh,
(16:00):
we are on this well-worn path where we're doing things only
the way that we've been taught, W
hat we have done is we have allowed ourselves to get into a
fixed mindset where we believe that these things are the
way that they are, a
nd this is the only way it's going to be.
This is who I am.
And this is the only way I'm going to be.
And I, I would, I would call BS on that and Part B, uh,
(16:24):
Louie, this is not who you are,
it is who you have chosen to be again and again and again.
And as a result of that,
you have created this well-worn path that you follow,
and you are a very predictable individual.
We can predict from a human behavior standpoint,
how you're going to react to things,
how you're going to show up,
what's your mindset is when something, uh, challenges you.
(16:47):
Uh,
it's going to be predictable because you're on this well-worn
path, and you've already played your cards.
We already know who's going to show up.
So what,
what I would encourage people to do is understand that
there are so many new possibilities for you in the
universe.
If you just, first of all, uh,
(17:07):
understand that there are over eight billion people on the
planet, they all know something that you don't,
which means that there is an opportunity for you to learn
and for you to grow every day.
For you to get up and be doing things the same old way
every day, following the same pattern, I mean, it's,
it's nothing more than underliving your potential, uh,
(17:30):
underliving the opportunity that God has given you to be a
greater version of yourself than exists today.
That can happen every day, Louie.
If I'm truly moving into a growth mindset where I know that
the best version of me yesterday can be, can be,
can be improved upon today if I am willing to understand
(17:54):
that I don't know what I don't know,
and there's always an opportunity for me to learn something
from Louie, from, from, from the barista at the,
at the Starbucks, I mean,
if I'm open to learning and growing and I listened with the
intent to be influenced,
if I'm reading these books with the intent to be
influenced,
(18:14):
I'm going to learn something from somebody else every
day of my life.
He's dropping golden nuggets and I want to capture a couple
of those before we move on.
One, learning.
I'm a huge advocate.
Mike and I share books and ideas all the time and so
because we're both learners, we're both curious,
you should never ever stop learning because he's absolutely
(18:35):
right.
He said something else, too.
You have the choice.
You're choosing to either stay the same or get out of that
comfort zone.
Another thing he touched on,
Mike has and I've learned a bunch of his acronyms from him
over the years,
but one of his acronyms is IFO (18:49):
I focus on the outcome. A
nd, he created that himself,
but I want you to understand he's talking about what's the
outcome.
That's the same as a goal.
Where are you headed?
Where are you going in your life?
If you know that, if you get clear on where you want to go,
then the rest of us starts to line up, right Mike?
(19:10):
What you want to learn and most importantly,
what I'm passionate about and you light my heart up
brother.
This is just so, it's like recharging me,
but I have a conversation with you,
but when you know where you're going,
what books to read becomes really easy, right?
People ask me what books should I read?
I don't know.
What are you focused on, right?
Where are you headed?
(19:31):
Well, who do you want to be?
Who do you want to be?
Because we get to be whoever we want to be and that's the
magic in that.
So can you again,
I don't want to let go of this culture thing because you're
such a great, when you came into my company,
it changed the game and the mind shifts.
So I'd like you to talk some more about culture on,
(19:51):
and so now that you've got a leader who's focused on
learning and improving every day, who they're going to,
and he said something else, everybody grabbed this.
He said, it could be little steps.
It doesn't matter.
It doesn't need to be quantum leaps.
It could be a little step, but every day, a little step,
a little step,
a little step over time really starts to add up.
(20:13):
So Mike,
how do people transform that into the culture and shift it
into the team?
And I'm passionate about this too, brother,
because I want this to go out for families as much as
organizations and teams and corporations,
because you can't do it in one place and not do it
someplace else.
(20:34):
Absolutely. Absolutely true.
So Louie, I got to say this because, I mean,
you teed this up really nicely.
Unless I have an outcome, I don't know where I'm going.
If I don't have my own North Star,
then I'm playing based upon what's in the rearview mirror,
what I've been taught.
(20:55):
So let me just give you an example of that real quickly.
If I don't have an outcome,
any road will get me to where I'm going.
I don't have a specific destination.
So when I have a outcome,
I have a very specific role that's going to get me there.
(21:16):
I'm going to know the appropriateness of my choices,
if I have an outcome.
I don't even know what's positive and what's negative,
if I don't have an outcome.
I'm only playing by historical data because everything in
this universe, Louie,
and I really want your listeners to get this,
has a positive and a negative context.
(21:37):
Everything in the universe has a positive and a negative
context.
However you have learned it and however you've experienced
it,
that's the way it's stored in your subconscious with a positive
and negative frame around it.
However,
everything in this universe has a positive and a negative.
So I don't even know the appropriateness of my choices.
I don't know positive and negative unless I have a very
(21:58):
specific outcome.
So now that I know where I'm going,
I know what choices are going to get me there.
I know what books I can read that's going to help me get
there.
I know what people I want in my community to surround
myself with.
I mean it allows me to be able to be very definitive about
(22:18):
who I am, what I'm about,
and what you can expect from me in the context of my
outcome.
So now let's get back to the small steps real quick.
Through the process of neuroplasticity,
in order for us to really create sustainable change,
we've got to understand the importance of the power of
(22:40):
repetition.
So if I'm taking small steps to a specific outcome and
getting small wins every day,
then through that process of small steps, small wins,
the power of repetition,
then I am going to create new behaviors.
So I would challenge everybody listening to this to
challenge everything that you've been taught.
(23:02):
So I just want to throw this log on fire real quick, Louie.
If I walk into my business or I walk into my home where my
boys are concerned or my wife, Susan,
and I walk up to one of them, Louie, and I say to you,
I want to give you some feedback.
What they now have is a negative frame around a word that
(23:26):
says you're going to criticize me.
So through the fight or flight mechanism,
they're automatically going to be defensive and absolutely
standoffish because of that one word.
So let me throw another big log on the fire before I go
where I'm going to go.
Words create pictures, and those pictures create emotions,
(23:49):
and then our energy and our action follow our thoughts.
So if you look at the frame that is around the word
feedback,
it's a negative frame that's going to create a negative
picture,
which now is going to put them in a negative space because
their energy and their actions are going to follow their
thought.
Their thought is that's negative.
(24:11):
Does that make sense so far, Louie?
Yes, sir.
I'm tracking with you.
Okay,
so now that we have an awareness around that one word that
we could change from a negative context to a positive
context, it's gonna create a much different picture.
It's gonna create a much different outcome.
(24:31):
It's gonna create a much different energy between those two
people.
So I invented a word,
and I've been using it a lot in the last 33 years,
and I really wanted to catch on, Louie.
I wanted to become a household word.
I wanted to become a cultural foundation for people.
(24:51):
And the word is "feed forward." So when I'm now giving
people feed forward, it changes everything.
So the rearview mirror comes down.
We're not gonna talk about what went wrong or what I don't
want from you.
We're gonna talk about what you need to do moving forward
in order for you to be more successful.
We're gonna paint a picture of where I want you to go,
(25:16):
not where you've been.
People think, Louie, that if I tell you what you did wrong,
then there's a good chance that you're not gonna do that
again.
Well, if you tell me what I did wrong, boss,
I still don't know what to do, right?
I need to interrupt you real quick.
I want you to I want everybody to catch that.
What he just said, boss,
you didn't give me and he's talking about pictures.
(25:36):
The brain works in pictures.
If I give you the word elephant and thanks for letting me
interrupt you, Mike, because this is flipping.
This is the goal, my brother.
This is the vein, right?
You're right there.
You got hair back in my neck standing up, man.
We've got this thing going on.
Our brain works in pictures.
And so if you're giving somebody feedback,
you're showing the picture of what was behind you,
his rear, Mike's rearview mirror theory,
(25:58):
care that bad boy off and throw it away.
But their picture that you're continuing to reinforce is
the negative that happened behind them.
You've got to show them the picture of what that outcome
is.
Where do you want them to go?
Give them I'm sorry to interrupt you, but go on.
I just I could let that go by.
That's beautiful, man,
and that's exactly what I'm just committed to do, man.
(26:20):
I am focused and committed to changing the world, Louie,
and it starts with you and me.
I mean, I can just do it two people at a time,
that that's perfectly okay,
because every one of those individuals are going to touch
somebody else.
I just want to focus on doing it two people at a time,
you and me.
So whoever's listening to this, they benefit from it,
(26:43):
that's great, but right now,
this is just about you and me right now, mano a mano,
one-on-one.
So now that I am communicating what I want them to do,
what I want you to observe when you embrace this is that
it's going to speed up the transaction.
It's going to develop more receptivity in the relationship.
(27:06):
They're going to be willing to take more risk.
So they're going to be more innovative.
They're going to be more resilient when we start managing
people like this and managing ourselves like this as well,
Louie.
So rather than me focusing on what went wrong,
if I now can get my mind skipped 180 degrees and focus on
(27:29):
what's going right, first of all,
I can celebrate that and I should,
but I'm doing a high five, baby, and I should.
And in addition to that,
I am now going to be in a much different energy moving
forward that's going to be a positive energy than over here
licking my wounds in a negative energy based upon the fact
(27:51):
that I did something wrong and I got beat up for it.
Again, man, you're on fire, Mike.
So again, listeners,
there's a couple of things I want to make sure you catch
this with what Mike's talking about.
One is he's talked about choices.
The other thing he said is every choice you make is going
to either lead to a negative or a positive.
And I love to tell people there's no fence straddling,
(28:12):
right?
Mike,
you can't stand in the middle of the road thinking it's
going to be okay.
Cause you're not doing anything, right?
It's going to go one way or the other,
but you're making these choices that are positive or
negative.
And I want you to know,
I want to touch on something else that Mike just said,
that's really near and dear to my heart.
We all have the power to change the world.
We all do.
And it's not some monumentous thing.
(28:32):
It's every day with your interaction with people, and Mike,
you hit that nail in the head,
and I want to share with the audience to this day,
I still use feed forward.
As a matter of fact, I sent out an email, Mike,
and you're on that email that I sent out today,
asking people to help me with the podcast and get it out.
And I asked them for feed forward.
And, and this is what I want all the listeners.
(28:54):
I want you all to grasp this.
I believe we're not supposed to know the full impact of our
downstream.
Mike,
you've impacted literally tens of tens of thousands of
lives.
And Mike said something that I think every leader needs to
realize.
If you only impact one person,
you have no idea how many lives they touch.
(29:16):
So you got to be the best you all the time with everybody,
because you don't know how far down it goes.
And I believe God gave us that on purpose, right?
If you knew how the impact you've had, Mike,
you couldn't get your head out the door.
And that's, and that's why God keeps us separate from that.
And I trust that whatever it is,
it's going to be what it's supposed to be.
Right.
That's that,
that's that faith and belief in what we're doing is, is,
(29:38):
is positive.
And so again, I don't,
I want the listeners to catch the importance of your
decisions headed in to a specific outcome and then what
those, those effects are having on other people, Mike,
I'd like to talk about at this point,
how do you tie culture to that vision of purpose in,
(29:59):
in making a difference?
One of the things I share with people,
I really believe our business,
whether you own a business or work in a business,
that's our spiritual practice.
I'd love to hear your thoughts on,
on how you tie the culture and the purpose or the vision
for the company or the organization or the family, right?
A lot of families don't have a vision of,
of who they want to be, how they want to be.
(30:19):
So can you talk about that, please?
Yeah, and you know, Lou, when you talk about culture,
we've had an opportunity to do some great work with some
great organizations and great teams that really were on
that well-worn path of doing things the way,
whatever best practices they have connected to.
(30:44):
And the first thing I like to do when I walk in the door is
tell them, Discover Leadership Training,
we're not focused on best practices.
We're focused on you creating the next practice.
So when you create the next practice,
it's because you set a specific outcome,
you've taken the human beings that are in this building,
this human dynamic which does not exist anywhere else on
(31:05):
the planet,
and you are absolutely utilizing all of the potential of
these people in the building to get to your specific
outcome.
So if I'm following somebody else's process,
I may be underliving my potential and my whole team may be
underliving their potential.
If we now create the outcome that we want,
(31:28):
whether it seems lofty or not is not what's important.
What's important over the course of time is how they play
the game.
So I am going to continually only address them when they
are playing the game in the appropriate manner that's gonna
(31:49):
get us to our outcome.
Those are the things that I'm gonna address.
So let me just throw this on there, Louie,
because this is where you're gonna think, okay,
I knew Mike Jones is crazy.
I never told my boys,
never told my boys that they were gifted,
that they were talented, that they were somehow special,
because all of those things will create a fixed mindset
(32:11):
where an individual does not realize that they've got to
work for what they want.
What I taught my boys was to have a great work ethic.
I only addressed them when they put in the effort.
I only addressed the effort.
The reason that you got that A on that test, bro,
(32:32):
is because you studied your butt off of that.
And so I'm now giving the dog a bone for what I want the
dog to continue doing,
because if you give a dog a bone for shitting in the middle
of the floor, Louie,
he gonna keep shitting in the middle of the floor.
Whatever you're rewarding is what the people are gonna do.
So if I'm in my business now,
and I know that we have set a specific outcome,
(32:52):
like we have KPIs and we wanna hit these numbers every
month,
I'm not going to judge them based upon whether or not we
hit that KPI or not.
I'm gonna judge them on how they played the game,
because there are gonna be circumstances and stuff that's
gonna happen that none of us have any control over.
The question is,
how did we come together as a team in those moments that
(33:14):
circumstances occurred that we didn't have any control over
and come together and synergistically deal with whatever it
was?
Not blaming, not advocating,
but coming together and doing everything that we can as a
team, as a unit that never says, that's not my job.
That never says that I got this much tenure,
(33:40):
so I'm the brain of the business or whatever.
There's opportunity for everybody to learn and everybody to
grow.
And what I'm gonna focus on is how they're playing the
game.
The things that I'm gonna address is how they're playing
the game.
And that is the one thing that we control.
(34:00):
That's the one thing that we can grow.
I mean,
every day and get better and absolutely make sure that they
get rewarded for how they're playing the game and not for
necessarily hitting outcomes.
So one of the one of Mike's catchphrases is a game changer.
He uses that in some of his trainings.
And I can tell you that what he was just talking about is
(34:22):
just that, right?
That's how you change the game is hold your focus on what
they're doing.
Right?
Not not.
And I love, I love to tell people manage by walking around,
right?
Go find people doing stuff, right?
Go find them playing the game the way you want them playing
the game.
Don't worry.
There's a lot of leaders that will wander around and
they're nitpicking things or they're jumping down people's
throats for what they're doing wrong or what.
(34:43):
And again,
that picture is completely different than where you're,
they want the outcome to go.
You touched on something, Mike,
that I don't want to gloss over.
And I want you to help the audience understand.
You said something very powerful about the team's
potential.
I'd like you to talk about how you,
when you go into companies and even one-on-one,
(35:05):
like you've done with me and other people,
what's your thoughts and advice on how do you get the
potential out of your people?
And what do you use to determine whether they're,
they should stay on the team or you need,
they need to go find another team?
Because you said another thing that is a truly golden
nugget.
Every team, every team is unique, right?
(35:26):
There are no two teams alike.
And again, Mike's Mike's telling you, here's another thing.
Mike's been saying, he's got a theme through this,
everybody.
One of the things he's saying is break out of the box.
Whatever you thought is the paradigm, that's the truth.
Tear it all down and start again,
because your team is like no other team.
And so your rules, your structure,
(35:46):
all the things that you think should be might be completely
different to get that maximum potential.
But Mike,
can you talk about how to get the most out of your people
for their potential and then also determine who should or
shouldn't be on your team?
Oh, yeah.
Oh, I mean, what a beautiful topic to me.
The one thing that we teach when we're working with a team
(36:08):
is we teach the leadership to start managing promises and
not expectations.
So when we're managing our expectations,
that's all historical stuff.
That's rearview mirror stuff.
And when we now start managing and you talk about here,
we could come back to personal responsibility,
we start managing promises,
(36:30):
we now have a much different culture,
a much different game that we're playing.
Because now I've come to you, Louie,
I've told you exactly what I need from you.
I've absolutely made sure that you can deliver that.
And if not, and then I'm going to teach you how to,
I'm not just going to tell you,
(36:50):
I'm going to I'm going to tell you, I'm going to show you,
then I'm gonna have you tell me and then you show me,
I'm going to make sure that you know exactly how to deliver
that.
Before I take my hands off of it,
and I am going to gain an agreement from you.
This is so important.
So important.
I'm going to gain an agreement from you that we're going to
(37:10):
deliver this at this level by this date.
So and once I have that that commitment and that agreement,
I can now manage that promise in game that that's got to be
really important.
I'm going to manage it in game and make sure that we are
successful because I am on your team.
(37:31):
I'm not going to just give you this and walk away and come
back in 30 days at the end of the deadline to see if you've
accomplished it or you have not.
I am never going to take my hand off of it.
People say that that's called micromanaging.
I disagree completely.
I am here to help manage this in game.
So I can give you adabars, kudos, high fives,
(37:53):
pats on the back, whatever you need a hug,
or whatever you need to keep doing that that way.
I'm going to keep encouraging you that you're doing the
right thing.
You're doing it the right way.
Or if you get off step a little bit,
I'm going to help manage that in game.
I'm not going to wait for you to fail and then jump all
(38:14):
over you at the end.
We're going to have a relationship that is a collaborative
relationship.
That's a two-way street that you can give and take with me
along this journey as we build this culture together.
So everybody, I want you to again, he, he, he's dropping,
he's not dropping little nuggets,
(38:35):
he's dropping boulders of gold.
So one of the things Mike just said is he's very clear and
very specific on what that outcome is that he wants that
perfect specific team member to have.
And then before he holds them accountable,
he's training them, teaching them, coaching them,
mentoring them,
(38:55):
all the things good leaders do to get them to,
and then he said something very important.
They tell him back how to do it, and they show him.
So he's got clear understanding.
There's no breakdown in that communication.
It's crystal clear what the outcome, the FOMO, right?
What am I focusing on?
(39:17):
And then he trains that to agreement because once you have
agreement,
then you know that you can kind of take your hands off the
wheel enough to audit or monitor them because you don't,
you're right, Mike, you don't walk away.
You don't lead by dropping it on them and then walking away
thinking it's just all going to be magic and it's all going
to go down the way you want it to.
(39:39):
I think that, and again,
I want everybody to know Mike has modeled this in my
relationship with him for,
I don't know how long we've known each other, Mike,
maybe a decade at this point, but he,
and I'm telling you in 10 years, he has not failed,
he has not failed to answer the phone or call me back and
hold that up and that's those promises he's talking about.
(40:00):
And again,
he keeps bringing back to personal responsibility.
Mike, I'd like to go a little bit further.
Can you talk about at some point now that you've done this
training, you've,
you've got somebody that you can hold accountable, but you,
you, you're walking the path with them, right?
I love that, that now that picture comes to my, my mind,
you're walking the path with them at what point,
how do you,
(40:21):
you coach and mentor leaders at what point do you decide,
you know, they need to move to another team.
They don't, it is not a good fit for our team.
Right.
And you know, I love the question.
I'm sorry, I didn't address it a moment ago.
But Louie, when when you are managing individuals,
by promises and not by expectations,
what ultimately happens is it speeds up the transaction for
(40:44):
you to know that this is the right person on my team or
not,
because you're going to be able to definitively see that
this person has integrity with themselves,
or they don't have integrity with themselves.
So if I'm building a culture based on trust,
and I know that if I'm managing my promise, at some point,
I'm going to be able to allow that person to be completely
(41:08):
autonomous for me, and not have to check on at all,
because we're going to have build a trusting relationship
that we know that they're going to play fall out every day
that they're going to deliver at a high level every day.
And I no longer need to give attention or energy to that
particular person,
I cannot go and do something else with with that time that
(41:30):
I got back.
Because I now know,
I'm not assuming I know that this person is a right person
for my team, based upon how they play the game.
And I can easily determine who's not a good fit for that,
based on how they're playing the game.
So they've made promises to me,
they've been shown exactly how things need to be done at
(41:53):
the level that they need to be done.
However, they refuse to do things at that level,
then they're definitely not going to be a good fit for my
team.
I love that, and I've heard the analogy.
I love your thoughts on it.
As soon as it crosses your mind that they're not a good
fit, you should let them go.
Do you agree with that?
(42:14):
Absolutely, absolutely. I
was talking to a leader yesterday, Louie, that I said,
I've been coaching you to cut ties with this person for
about six months now.
And soon as you do it, you're gonna say,
I wish I had done that sooner.
And that's exactly what he said yesterday.
I wish I had listened to you.
I wish I had done that sooner.
(42:34):
Now I've got a bigger mess to clean up than I would have
had six months ago.
And I love what you said, as soon as it crosses your mind,
that this is not a good fit for my team.
It's not a good fit for your team.
And you need to do something about it.
One of the things I was in an organization when I would,
I would go into a networking chapters.
And one of the things that blew me away, Mike, was,
and I like, and like you speak to this,
(42:56):
because I'm sure you've had much more experience than I
have, but it was,
it was unbelievable to me how one bad apple,
one person in a chapter of 15, 20, 30 winners would,
they could suck the whole, that whole chapter down.
Could you talk to about that a little bit and why it's so
important to get that apple out sooner than later?
Absolutely. So, so, so, Louie,
(43:16):
you know you right in my wheelhouse right now,
because I know we all grew up playing sports and people
taught us that there's no I in team.
One of the things that we teach to Discover Leadership T
raining is that there is absolutely an I in team because
every person matters.
Every person is going to affect this culture,
(43:37):
this environment,
this family or whatever the case may be either positively
or negatively.
There is absolutely no neutral in the context of this.
So for me to have my team at work performing and producing
the optimal outcome,
then everybody's got to be on board and doing their job.
(43:58):
It would only take one of them, Louie,
to be that bad apple or not performing at that same high
level for us to now have some total, S-U-M-T-O-T-A-L.
So if we want optimal,
everybody's got to be accepting person responsibility to be
the I in team,
to deliver at the quality and at the speed and whatever
(44:21):
that we have agreed upon.
It would only take one of them in order to throw a wrench
in that for us to end up with sum total and not optimal.
Only one.
Uh, yeah, I love that Mike,
and it's really powerful because I think people tolerate,
especially in the, in the market today,
I don't understand why,
(44:41):
but they tolerate things because they think, well,
I can't replace this person.
You can't afford not to replace that person, right?
They could suck the rest of the team down faster than you
can whistle Dixie.
And then, and like, like the leader you were just coaching,
then you got a real mess on your hands because,
and here's the thing that I've,
and I like to like you to talk about this a little bit too,
(45:02):
because, and again, we could do this for hours,
but I'd like you to talk about the,
what does it do to the team when you let that one bad apple
stray off of our core values,
off a personal responsibility, what happens?
Yeah,
so one of the things that you're doing as a leader when you
allow that, Louie,
(45:22):
you are damaging the trust as it relates to this team.
You are also setting a precedence that it's okay to operate
at this level and still have a job and still get paid.
And that allowing that in the culture is going to bring the
quality of the whole thing down because now you have now
(45:44):
given other people permission to behave in the exact same
way.
You cannot confront them if you're not going to confront
that.
The more you confront that, what I have learned over time,
Louie, it brings a level of trust up.
It brings a level of receptivity and synergy up on the team
because they now know that this is not going to be
(46:04):
tolerated in this culture.
We only are going to play based upon our promises.
And when that culture is one that is being managed by
promises and not expectations,
you are absolutely going to see people behave way
differently than they are normally in the traditional
environment.
(46:25):
So this is really rich, Mike.
So that leads me to another question.
So I would love to hear your thoughts and advice to leaders
on how do they have that hard conversation?
A lot of people are afraid of confrontation,
or to your point earlier, you know,
if you were to say something like,
and you mentioned this before we started recording about
(46:45):
constructive criticism, right?
But how do you coach people on how to have those difficult
conversations and confront the issue to stop that and not
tolerate it right now?
Yeah, and Louie,
when you are managing promises versus expectations,
when you have a culture that is focused on giving people
feed forward in game,
(47:07):
there really are no tough conversations because you've now
developed a relationship that has trust in it,
that whatever conversation needs to happen is going to
happen and is not gonna be a whole lot of negativity
involved in it, if any.
But the one thing that we really gotta sell here is that
(47:27):
when I'm giving people feed forward consistently,
they are now going to be seeking out my observation.
They're gonna be seeking out my commentary.
They're gonna be seeking out.
They're not gonna be running from it.
They're not gonna be hiding it.
They see me show up because I'm a command and control
leader.
They put their heads down.
(47:48):
They don't wanna hear anything from me.
But when I now am the leader who's walking around,
you're catching people doing things right,
rather than catching them doing things wrong,
then they are gonna be more receptive to everything that I
have to say.
And those tough conversations are no longer tough
conversations.
They are just normal conversations in the context of this.
(48:10):
So again, everybody save this, replay it.
He just another, another huge piece of wisdom.
And he's talking about the communication, right?
He's talking about that communication that's gone on the
entire time with the team, with the family,
so it's really clear where we're heading,
how we're playing the game, who we're busy being,
and how we're going to get to where we all mutually want to
(48:32):
go.
So at that point,
it's really easy to have that conversation because it's not
like you haven't been communicating with these people.
And that's difficult, isn't it, Mike?
When,
when you don't communicate regularly and then out of the,
and to them,
it seems like you come out of the blue and you're dropping
the hammer and they're like, Oh, I had no idea.
If you,
if you're delivering a message and they have no idea,
your communication skills suck.
(48:53):
You need to work on that, right?
Take personal responsibility for how,
how you're communicating gives, because they should,
they should,
they should be telegraphed to them on a regular basis.
And again, I love that you're,
you keep going back to personal responsibility and the
positive, how can they spin this to the positive?
Yeah, I just want to say this real quick.
It is important,
(49:15):
because I know a lot of folks will resonate with this,
to give the feed forward in game.
If you're one of those people,
and I know a lot of people listening to this will
definitely resonate with this,
that allows whatever's going on to just marinate and stew
and simmer until you get to a point that you're angry or
(49:37):
frustrated, it's not going to come out positive.
It's not going to come out in a way that anybody is going
to be receptive to it.
So if you're now doing this in game,
when you see it say something,
when you see that they're not doing it the way that they
need to be doing,
give them the feed forward in that moment so that they will
(49:58):
know how to do it and what you want them to do,
not what you don't want them to do, or what not to do.
Yeah, that very powerful Mike,
and I'd like to share that with the audience.
What Mike's talking about is again this the power of
positive communication.
And one of the things that I like to, and I learned this,
I forget where I learned it from, but it doesn't matter,
(50:19):
is start with a what question, not a why question, right?
To your point earlier, you asked somebody a why question,
they instantly start to back up and that's at the fight or
flight, right?
Why did you, and instead of asking, hey, what went on,
what happened?
Completely different kind of frame of mind and we're
looking at what happened, not why did you do something?
Very powerful.
(50:40):
Mike, I really appreciate this.
Is there anything you'd like to add or something you wanted
that's on your heart that you'd like to share with the
audience?
Yeah,
and what I would like to say is what I really feel like
will be very beneficial to everybody that's listening to
this.
And that is,
(51:01):
I really want you to examine how you start your day.
So if you're a snooze button hitter,
I want you to be aware that you're in a negative mindset.
When you do that,
you're having a negative conversation with yourself.
You're creating all of this negative energy around
yourself, and you haven't even gotten out of the bed yet.
(51:21):
So you've already started your day in a negative way.
Those of you all that are multiple snooze button hitters,
oh my god.
Think about how much negativity you've created for
yourself, and you haven't even gotten out of your bed yet.
So,
I like to suggest to people that they take their phone or
their alarm clock and move it across the room.
(51:41):
Because we're not talking about motivation anymore, Louie,
we're talking about self-discipline.
I say the more and more you build that self-discipline
muscle,
you'll be motivated to continue doing whatever it is that
you need to do.
But it's not about needing more motivation or willpower.
It's about self-discipline.
So if I now made a commitment to myself that when that
(52:02):
alarm goes off, I'm going to get up,
I'm already working that self-discipline muscle and making
it stronger.
Because I did what I said I was going to do.
I'm accepting personal responsibility for that.
So now that I'm up, what I would suggest to people, Louie,
is don't go turn on CNN or Fox.
You already know that's going to be negative.
Don't go get your morning newspaper out the driveway and
(52:23):
sit down with a cup of coffee and start reading that.
Don't let that be the first thing that you ingest into your
spirit.
So like Louie does,
and I know he does it because we talk about this,
is the second thing that I want you to do once you get up
is read something positive.
I mean,
there are millions of websites out there on the internet
(52:44):
that have positive inspirational messages.
You can send us a message at Discover Leadership Training.
We'll send you one of our books that has 365 Positive M
essages in.
But read something positive.
Start your day by reading something positive.
For those of y'all that are really spiritual people,
is that your Bible, whatever,
just make a commitment to read something positive.
(53:07):
And then once you have started your day like that,
I want you to observe the difference that it makes for your
entire day in everything that you got to deal with all day
long.
Mike, I love that, so that leads me,
I brought my book today, 365 Powerful Messages,
(53:27):
and I want people that are watching,
you can see that this thing's dog-eared.
I'm actually on my fourth time through it,
so this is a year of positive messages.
This is a book Mike wrote, and not only is it, and Mike,
this just occurred to me literally in the moment,
but I have my card from Discover Leadership,
that's my bookmark in your book.
And for those of you that can't see it, again,
(53:49):
this is a God moment,
the hair on the back of my neck standing up, but it says,
I am worthy, and I read this, I am worthy,
I choose to believe in myself,
I matter in everything that I do,
and I'm committed to love and respect myself,
I will create a better version of myself, I am worthy.
And I read that when I read your page for the day.
And so, what he's talking about is very powerful,
(54:11):
and it's as simple as getting a book.
Now, Mike, before,
I want people to know how to be able to get in touch with
you, but I'd like to publicly relate right now, thank you,
because this just came up to me in the moment.
And it touches me, I'm sorry, it moves my heart, brother.
I would not be doing this podcast had I not gone through
Discover Leadership.
I mean that, and that light just went off right now.
(54:35):
I went through those fears, am I good enough?
Who the hell am I to be leading a podcast?
Who am I to talk about love?
Who am I to talk about leadership?
But to your point, I got out of that,
I let those beliefs go and thought, I'm gonna go do this,
and I just took those little steps and bam, here we are.
But I can tell you that the impetus of that came from the
(54:55):
four days I spent with you for Discover Leadership.
And so, I'd love for you to tell people now,
and now I wanna be clear,
Mike's got a program called Discover Leadership,
and the only way,
the only way that you can get in is to be nominated.
He doesn't take every chuckle head off the street.
And one of the reasons why he doesn't is because you have
(55:15):
to commit.
You have a conversation, even after you're nominated,
you have a conversation with Mr.
Mike Jones himself,
because he wants to know how committed you are to making a
change in your life, to live in the life of your dreams,
to focus on your outcomes, to be the best version of you.
So,
and his success rate is very high because he's got a screening
process that only takes the people that really wanna change
(55:36):
the game, the game changers.
So, I'm gonna tell everybody listening in the audience,
if you'd like to get into Discover Leadership,
reach out to me personally,
and I will nominate you to Mike Jones personally,
and Mike Jones and I have both a professional and personal
relationship,
but I will nominate you personally to get into Discover
Leadership because otherwise you can't get in.
You can contact Mike for books,
(55:58):
have him come to speak at your organization or an event,
but he will not let you into Discover Leadership without a
nomination, and trust me, I love him,
and it's people that have gone through it.
My team members, other people, friends that I've known,
Mike Anderson, a mutual friend of ours,
refers tons of people in the collision industry, but again,
if you want that nomination, please reach out to me,
(56:19):
I'll be happy to make that happen, but Mike,
how can people get ahold of you and what are some of the
other things that you offer that you can help them with?
Yeah, for sure, Louie.
They can contact us through the website at
discoverleadership.com.
Send me a message there.
I love just, you know,
connecting with people and kind of talking through their
(56:41):
stories.
I love hearing people's stories.
We will offer coaching to people that are graduates of our
program and people that aren't.
I mean, so if they need anything from us,
we know that there's like 8 billion people on the planet.
We're not going to touch every last one of them,
but we want to touch as many of them as we possibly can.
(57:03):
They can join my Facebook page.
It's a public page.
So and follow us there.
We drop a Hump Day Wisdom,
which is an article every Wednesday.
And they can make it.
They can see it on that Facebook page.
Mike Jones, Discover Leadership Training.
And yeah, we would just love to connect with them so.
(57:26):
Well, Mike, thank you very much.
I highly recommend that you reach out to Mike,
as you can hear and see easily.
He's just a wealth of wisdom and knowledge.
And I can tell you that Mike Jones is living what he's
talking about because we didn't pre-emphasis with any
specific questions.
We let it be organic, and it went where it went.
(57:46):
So these are the kind of people you wanna seek out in your
life that will help you change your life.
And trust me when I tell you,
Mike Jones is a man that does that every day.
So Mike, I love you brother.
Thanks for taking the time and what a true joy.
And I'd like to invite you in the future,
we'll do this again because we just,
you're like the iceberg, right?
We just hit the tip of your iceberg, brother,
(58:08):
underneath the water,
there's just a whole mass of stuff you still know.
Absolutely, man.
Thank you, Louie, for allowing me to do this.
I'm honored, humbled by your friendship and your love.
And I love you.
I love you as well, my brother.
Absolutely.
Thanks again for joining us and listening to this episode
of Leadership and Love.
I would like to challenge you to ask yourself what's one
(58:31):
thing that you heard today that you can implement
immediately to improve your leadership and accelerate your
growth.
If you've gotten value out of this episode or learned
something that you can implement today,
we'd ask that you please share it with those that you care
about.
Our goal is to create more leaders who are leading with
(58:51):
love.
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