All Episodes

September 11, 2025 ‱ 19 mins

Grab theđŸ“± ↘"He doesn't reply" Flow Chart (free):

https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/flow

 

It only takes eight seconds
 or does it? ⏰ 

 

Remember scrolling Instagram, seeing that reel, and thinking,

“Why isn’t he replying? It’s just eight seconds!”

 

That’s exactly how anxious attachment tricks us making us chase validation, obsess over texts, and feel like every delayed reply is rejection.

In this episode, I unpack why this “eight-second trap” fuels anxiety, overthinking, and the addictive chase cycle. I share why your emotional safety doesn’t depend on anyone else, how to stop texting obsessively, and the step-by-step tools I use (and teach clients) to calm your brain and feel secure on your own.

 

We talk real examples: heart racing when they’re “typing,” overanalyzing likes, messages, and stories, and feeling too much in love or friendship.

I also share practical actions—from journaling out your thoughts, setting boundaries for yourself, spotting patterns without personalizing, and walking away from crumbs—to reclaim your peace and confidence.

If you’ve ever felt anxious waiting for a text, overanalyzed replies, or let someone else control your emotions, this episode is your guide to healing your anxious attachment, trusting yourself, and stopping the chase.

 

ON SALE (27 euros only)

Stop obsessing over Text in 21 days or less - Course:

https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/textanxiety

 

 

CHAPTERS:

00:00 The Eight Second Dilemma 03:12 Why its makes sense to want them to reply quickly (but it's wrong) 05:45 The Viral "if he wanted to he would" video 08:03 5 Reasons Why This Is Toxic for Anxious Attachment 12:54 How action plan to feel more secure when they don't reply

 

Want more support?

➞ Monthly Text + Talk Support đŸ“Č đŸ–€

(daily coaching, check-ins + reassurance and becoming secure, text by text, commitment free support, cancel any month)

https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/textandtalk

 

➞ Monthly Coaching Calls đŸ“žđŸ–€

(2x calls a month or unlimited calls + text support to help you become secure)

https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/oneononecoachingsubscription

 

➞ SHOP + FREE RESOURCES

https://linktr.ee/the.anxious.to.secure.coach/shop

 

 

Attachment Style QUIZ – Take the 3-min quiz to be 100% sure you're Anxiously Attached: 3 MIN QUIZ

 

How to Stop OVERTHINKINGđŸš« 🌀Your Relationship in 4 Steps (With Your Avoidant Partner)

 

đŸ•ŠïžđŸ“± ↘"He doesn't reply" Flow Chart (free):

https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/flow

 

DISCLAIMER: I'm not a therapist or doctor. This content is for informational and entertainment purposes only. It's not intended to diagnose, treat, or heal any mental health conditions.

This is not meant for situations involving abusive relationships of any kind. Always seek professional advice for personal health concerns.

 

Remember: Change in your relationship starts with YOU, thought by thought and action by action.

Mark as Played
Transcript

Advertise With Us

Popular Podcasts

Stuff You Should Know
Ruthie's Table 4

Ruthie's Table 4

For more than 30 years The River Cafe in London, has been the home-from-home of artists, architects, designers, actors, collectors, writers, activists, and politicians. Michael Caine, Glenn Close, JJ Abrams, Steve McQueen, Victoria and David Beckham, and Lily Allen, are just some of the people who love to call The River Cafe home. On River Cafe Table 4, Rogers sits down with her customers—who have become friends—to talk about food memories. Table 4 explores how food impacts every aspect of our lives. “Foods is politics, food is cultural, food is how you express love, food is about your heritage, it defines who you and who you want to be,” says Rogers. Each week, Rogers invites her guest to reminisce about family suppers and first dates, what they cook, how they eat when performing, the restaurants they choose, and what food they seek when they need comfort. And to punctuate each episode of Table 4, guests such as Ralph Fiennes, Emily Blunt, and Alfonso Cuarón, read their favourite recipe from one of the best-selling River Cafe cookbooks. Table 4 itself, is situated near The River Cafe’s open kitchen, close to the bright pink wood-fired oven and next to the glossy yellow pass, where Ruthie oversees the restaurant. You are invited to take a seat at this intimate table and join the conversation. For more information, recipes, and ingredients, go to https://shoptherivercafe.co.uk/ Web: https://rivercafe.co.uk/ Instagram: www.instagram.com/therivercafelondon/ Facebook: https://en-gb.facebook.com/therivercafelondon/ For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iheartradio app, apple podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.com

Dateline NBC

Dateline NBC

Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com

Music, radio and podcasts, all free. Listen online or download the iHeart App.

Connect

© 2025 iHeartMedia, Inc.