May 10, 2024 • 46 mins
In this captivating episode, Gia sits down with the remarkable Traci Peterson, founder and CEO of Elevate Wellness and Aesthetics, and visionary behind the mother-daughter movement, BE.
Traci shares her personal journey of triumph over self-doubt and external validation, revealing how a pivotal moment in her adolescence shaped her understanding of confidence and leadership. Despite facing backlash and years of people-pleasing, Traci's story is one of resilience and empowerment.
During our conversation, Traci offers practical advice for mothers and daughters to develop together, emphasizing the importance of one-minute moments and her seven woman lessons. She encourages listeners to prioritize activities that regenerate energy and align with their values, leading to a more fulfilled life.
Listeners will be inspired by Traci's insights into living a full life and reclaiming one's divine gifts. Join us as we uncover the power of embracing authenticity and leading by example for the next generation.
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Episode Transcript
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(00:00):
Welcome to Your Future Starts Now, the go-to podcast for
extraordinary women who are ready to step into their next chapter with
authentic confidence. I'm your host, Gia Lacqua, empowerment coach,
motivational speaker, children's book author, and girl mom. Whether
you're a corporate powerhouse or an entrepreneur, this show is
designed for you. Your Future Starts Now is more than
(00:20):
just a podcast. It's a movement, a movement towards rewriting
the rules of success for high-achieving women. Are you ready
to get unstuck and step into your next chapter? If
so, you are exactly where you need to be. Your future starts
now. Welcome to Your Future Starts Now. I'm
your host, Gia Lacqua. Thanks for joining us today. I am so
(00:42):
excited to introduce you to Traci Peterson. Traci
is an international speaker, highly sought after trainer, has
spoken to over 24,000 people, performs in front of 100,000 in
sports audiences. She's a board certified family nurse practitioner, founder,
CEO of Elevate Wellness and Aesthetics, She's treated
over 6,000 female patients and was awarded the number
(01:04):
one top team builder in 50 countries with Amare for
outstanding leadership and long-term team retention. Her
latest project is called BE, a mother-daughter movement grounded
in connection and protection. With collective medical wellness,
aesthetics, and leadership experience of 15 plus years, Traci is
widely regarded by her male and female peers patients, clients,
(01:26):
entrepreneurs, and moms alike. She helps high-performing women
and their daughters conquer self-criticism and comparison through
identifying their unique and divine gifts and finding
validation through learning to love yourself and to lean on
God. She helps people practically remember who they are
so they can confidently raise the next generation of leaders.
(01:55):
Yeah, I'm excited to chat with you today. So before we dive in,
so our listeners can get to know you a little bit better, tell us a little bit about
Yeah. I mean, I think, thank you for asking. I love
being able to share my story because I feel like we all have stories and
we all have sort of this evolution that we go through as women.
(02:17):
And so my background, I was raised in a really good
family. I would say that I was a high achiever from
a very young age. I'm a recovering perfectionist now.
I had those perfectionist tendencies very early on. In
my life, I always played sports and I always wanted to play with
the boys and all those good things. And
(02:42):
what I had and what I noticed is I had these natural
talents and these natural leadership gifts and abilities. And
I was celebrated for those like all throughout my life until
I reached the age of 14. And
I remember at the time, I
(03:03):
was waiting to hear the results of the student body
office class presidencies, and
I was sitting in that last period of the day, and
I swear I didn't even remember anything that that teacher said. I just heard the
ticking. of the clock, and I remember his
voice coming over the loudspeaker. And he said,
(03:25):
we have the winners of your student body officers. And
he read through Secretary Crystal Sorensen, Vice
President Sonny Dent, and your new student body
president is Traci Osler.
And I was like, Oh my gosh, it's amazing. And everybody in my class was
like jumping all around me and they were so excited and so happy for
(03:48):
me. And I was like, I won. Right. It's like what you want. And
I was so happy in that moment. And I remember walking out
in the hallway as a 14 year old girl and
walking up to my group of friends and they didn't know that
I was standing there. And they were like, I
can't even believe that she won anyway. Like she thinks she's so
(04:08):
great. And all of this, which obviously completely
broke my heart. And I was like, so
I went to somebody that I, that I loved looking
for, um, validation looking
for, um, just some, empathy
(04:29):
and love. And I said, why, why do these girls
have such a hard time with me? And this person
that I love and that I care about said, well, we've
been talking about it and we all agree that you're
too confident, you're too bossy, you're
too loud, and it makes people feel uncomfortable. Wow.
(04:53):
And so I think from that point on, I
started I started feeling
like it was my responsibility to make people around me
comfortable. Like I needed to lower
my natural gifts, like achieve, but don't achieve
too much to make people feel uncomfortable, which was really
(05:16):
a confusing place for me to be because I feel like,
you know, I had these natural leadership gifts and abilities. until
somebody said something. And I think many people,
especially women and men as well, we can trace it
back to something that somebody said or something that
somebody did where we were given this label that
(05:40):
created a limit within ourselves. And
I remember I would have this like response
anytime I heard the word bossy, I was like, No, like
it was like a trigger where I was like, no, no, no, I'm not bossy. I'm not bossy. No, no, no, I'm not.
I'm not bossy. And that carried on Gia for
probably like 20 years. It started this
(06:02):
sort of people pleasing, like looking for every
bit of validation in every accolade
and every achievement. It's like I became this hyper achiever
to try to fill this void and
this hole because I thought there was something wrong with me. I
(06:22):
thought there was something wrong with those gifts that
I innately had. And it wasn't until later on, that's why
I'm so impassioned about this mother-daughter movement,
because I think sometimes very, very
well-intentioned mothers, we can inadvertently project
our insecurities onto our daughters. And
(06:46):
so I wanted to create a
container and a community for mothers and
daughters where they could personally develop
together, where they could move from a place of insecurity to
surety about who they are, about
what gifts they have to give, and they can then support
(07:08):
one another in developing those gifts. So that's really where this
came from, is how can we liberate ourselves
from some of these limits? How can we avoid, as
mothers, projecting some of our insecurities onto our
daughters? And the way we do that is by continually developing
(07:28):
and working on our own insecurities, knowing that we have them, and
then continually be pouring into ourselves and
trying to gain
real inner confidence. And you find
that through validating self and finding that validation,
(07:49):
not in external people, but in
the internal and the eternal. It's by looking inward and
Such an incredible, incredible story. Thank you for sharing
that. Traci, there's so much there to unpack. First
of all, I mean, we know 14 year old girls can be brutal. And,
(08:10):
you know, although it was a very difficult, I
imagine, and challenging situation for you to navigate, it's
beautiful to see you on the other side of that, right, and
where it brought you in terms of pursuing your passion and
your purpose. So there is beauty in that. But
I want to go back to a couple of things that you said that are really super important.
(08:33):
So I think a lot of us have had similar experiences, and a lot of
our listeners can relate to those situations where we were too
much for somebody, right? Too loud, too
bossy, too confident, too silly, right?
And as kids, as you said,
sometimes it's inadvertent. Sometimes it's not intentional. It's
(08:54):
not meant to be malicious. But whether it's family
or friends, we get labeled. Yes. And
those labels stick and they stick with
us through childhood into adulthood when we are no longer that
same person. Exactly. And I see it all the time in
the clients that I work with. We hold on to them because they become
(09:16):
part of our identity. Right. And then you're afraid to let them go
because you're like, no, this is who I am. But the reality is
we're dynamic, fluid people and we change and
we evolve. And so but it's really hard to shed
those old layers and those old identities. So I
appreciate that you mentioned, you know, 20 years later, you still
(09:37):
had Right. And it drove some of those qualities that
also we, you know, I think everyone can also relate to the people pleasing and
the perfectionism. Right. And that external validation,
because we are trying to accommodate other people. We are
trying to make sure everybody, everybody around
us is comfortable. Right. That they are happy. And
(10:00):
what does that mean? We have to adapt. We have
to change who we are. and that light
that you bring to the world. If somebody says it's too bright, what
do we do? We turn it down. Totally. Right. And
so I love everything you just said. There's a couple of things you
mentioned. I would love to dig into a little bit more. You mentioned, you
(10:21):
know, having that sense of inner confidence and really
shifting to self validation away
from the external validation to self validation. So could you elaborate on
that a little bit more, those concepts and tips and tools you have for
Yeah, definitely. I think it goes back to
(10:42):
really looking inward and upward for your validation. So how
do you do that? Where do you start? I developed
these seven woman lessons in
order to help women and their daughters look inward and upward for
validation. Because my daughter, who's
11 now, I have an 11-year-old, a nine-year-old, and a six-year-old. But
(11:03):
when my 11-year-old daughter, Quinn, was nine, she
said to me, it was just regular after-school activities. The
TV was on, I was doing dishes. And she said, Mom, can
we do woman lessons? And I was like, It's
like, we can do women lessons, of course. Like as a
nine-year-old, what a mature question to ask. Can we do women lessons? And
(11:25):
I was like, yes. What does that mean to you? What
do you want to learn? And she said, well, I
want to learn how to do my makeup. I want to learn how to put together
an outfit. And I want to learn how to cook. And
my mama heart was like, that is so sweet. And
then this driving, entrepreneurial, powerful
(11:48):
woman was like, is
that all that she thinks that it is to be a woman? Is
what we look like and what we do? And I
was like, how? How can I teach her? how women
are so much more than that, how you can be a confident, a
self-assured, articulate, opinionated woman,
(12:10):
spirit-led, all of those things. Who do I want her
to grow up to be? And who am
I now? And what lessons did I have to
learn? What did it take for me to get here? And how
can I help her to avoid all those pitfalls
that I struggled with for over, what,
(12:33):
20, almost 30 years now? And and that's
what helped me to develop these seven woman lessons. And
so the base, the foundation of it is remembering who
you are. Because I think oftentimes as
parents, we have we have children and it's
less about us teaching them how to be an
(12:54):
adult and them reminding us how
to be more like a child. 100%. 100% because
I think if we all think back to a time in our life, and
I take my moms and my daughters through this, where
we close our eyes and we remember back to a time when
(13:15):
we were the most self-assured, the most happy, the most blissful,
the most filled with joy, and we didn't care what other
people thought about us. Usually it's right between
the ages of like six and eight. And
my mind takes me back to a time when I
was with my friends and I was seven years old
(13:38):
and I went to my best friend Stephanie's house and we were running
through the sprinklers. Like we had that long yellow slip and
slide and never once did I think What
swimming suit should I wear so it doesn't show my cellulite? What
friends are going to be there and are they more fit than me? Should I wear a one
piece? All of those insecurities that
(14:00):
pop up for us as women, which
is so unfortunate and it breaks my heart and it makes me so sad.
And I remember going to Stephanie's house and
walking into her backyard and my feet were greeted by
this cold, muddy hose water. Like
we all know that like freezing cold hose water and
(14:23):
you were like so grounded in the present moment
and you were so grateful to just be with your friends and
be alive and have this amazing able body
where you could run and jump and laugh and play and
you didn't once care what you looked like, what
somebody thought of you. You were just, you
(14:46):
were just able to be. Like, you are
just able to be. And that's why I actually named
this Mother Daughter Movement, BE. It's a place where you
can build belief in yourself and elevate
other people as you become who God created you to
be. And he created us and we started out
(15:06):
as just these amazing children, right?
And then the world sort of packs all of these labels
and everybody else projects their insecurities onto us. And
we sort of take those throughout our life. So I think at the base, at
the foundation, is remembering who you are
every day, reminding yourself who that young
(15:29):
girl was and who that young girl still is
inside of you. And then also
remembering whose you are. Like God created you
with very specific divine gifts for
a very specific reason. And I believe that each one
of us has a mission and a potential that only we
(15:50):
can fulfill. We were given certain trials,
certain hardships, certain gifts and abilities, and
we're meant to bless other people with those. And
so I think if we can identify and own
whatever that divine gift is, knowing that
the world sees you're different as difficult, but
(16:12):
God sees you're different as divine. And
going back to that example of when I was 14, I
learned how to become liberated from some of those limits through
reframing. So when I think, oh,
you're too bossy, I reframe and I say, actually,
I'm a master delegator. So there's no
(16:35):
longer this negative connotation with it. There is this
positive and uplifting thing that actually helps
to benefit society and helps to benefit my businesses and
helps to benefit my family. A lot of times women will
be told you're too emotional. No, it's
almost like you're setting up a boundary and you're saying no, like even
(16:56):
just saying no. That's a pattern interrupt as
well, right? You're saying, no, I'm choosing this. I don't
choose this. That doesn't serve me. I choose that. I'm
not too emotional. I'm actually incredibly empathetic, which
allows me to connect well to people. So it's
reframing some of those negative labels. And
(17:18):
that's how you become liberated from those things. And that's the thing. Whenever
somebody's like, Traci, you're
high maintenance. It's like, actually, I just know my value. Those
things don't trigger me anymore, Tia. If somebody calls me bossy, I'm
like, yes, I'm a mystery investigator. I
(17:39):
get crap done. That's what I do. Exactly. Those
are two of the lessons that we talk about, but the foundation is remembering who
you are and who you used to be and then
owning your divine gift and learning to relabel
some of those limits. And that's truly how we become liberated from
(17:59):
them. And it's such an empowering place to be. I think it's
honestly learning to love yourself.
we have to learn how to love ourselves again. And I think oftentimes
in, in the Christian community, sometimes we
forget, I think it's Matthew 22, when
(18:20):
we learn about like the two great commandments, there's a
little tag at the end of the second, right? We focus on
love God and love your neighbor as
you love yourself. We forget the,
as you love yourself and that
is critical, critical in
(18:41):
order for you to love your neighbor because you can't give
what you don't have. And the best
way to honor your creator is to love his
gifts. And you're one of his gifts. Like we
were created in the image of God. And so I
just think that divine relationship between
(19:02):
self and the creator is
invaluable. It's invaluable. So we talk about that a lot within
this mother-daughter movement, like setting up daily gratitude practices
to really kind of ground yourself in the present moment.
and really honoring and owning your divine gifts. And
(19:23):
then looking for those divine gifts in other women, too. I think
that's something that culture and society doesn't want us to do. They
typically pit us against each other. And it's
very competitive when it should be collaborative. And
the only way we change that is if we no longer
(19:45):
For sure. For sure. So much there and
so beautifully stated. You know, it's funny what you
just said resonated with me as a mother, because
my nine-year-old just the other day was watching one of her shows.
And after the show was over, she had gone to her room and I found her
sobbing. And I said, oh no, what
(20:07):
just happened? And she tells me that she's crying
about the episode. And I said, well, was it sad? And
she goes, yeah, but it ended up being a happy ending. And so I
said, okay, well, what's causing you to cry? There's really sad
music. And it finally dawned upon me that it's the first time
that she had experienced, like she had created such a connection with the characters that
(20:29):
she actually felt their sadness,
right? When you get really into a show or a movie and you like
feel what the characters are feeling, you go. It's the first time she experienced
that. And my initial reaction was
like, you know, don't be don't be don't be
too emotional. Right. That was my instinct was to
(20:50):
try to calm her down and say it's just a show. And then I
said, no, this kid is a highly
empathetic. Highly in tune with her emotions. And
that is one, just one of her many gifts that
this child is bringing to this world. Right. And
so it totally reframed how I just sat with
(21:12):
her and held her and let her cry. Right.
And just let her get it out. And so it was a really important
Absolutely. Absolutely. And good job. Like, good job
for you. Because I think that's what I'm trying to
empower these moms, these high performing women
(21:33):
with is to use these one minute moments. Yeah. use
those one minute moments to your advantage, to your
daughter's advantage. When I was standing at the counter and
my daughter asked me, can we do woman lessons? And
I want to learn how to cook, how to do my makeup and
how to put together an outfit. I could have been like, sure. Yeah,
(21:54):
cool. We can do that. Moving on to my next task. But
these one minute moments are speckled
throughout our day. And they're so foundational. and
so formative. And the way that you
responded in that moment was like a
thing of beauty. You allowed her to be
(22:18):
who God created her to be. You validated her
emotion in that moment, and emotions are beautiful. And
the fact that she could feel that, I love how deeply you
feel for people. It's just validating those emotions
that's so good. I mean, It's, again, we just have to be
careful, just so careful how the
(22:41):
words that we choose, because the words that we choose become
Yeah, for sure. For the rest of their life. For the rest
of their lives. And to your point, earlier point, it's, you know, what we
were taught and told growing up, we've grown
and evolved. And so that is a pattern interruption of itself, right?
(23:01):
You know, a lot of us were taught to suppress or ignore the
quote-unquote ugly feelings or the bad feelings or don't make other
people feel funny because you're sad or you're crying, right? And
so that is definitely a shift. It's a mindset shift to
say, no, we're going to embrace that sadness. We're going
to cry it out, right? And that's a significant shift,
(23:22):
but it is those moments exactly to
what you just said that make and shape who
they are as they grow up. And it's also modeling that behavior. Right.
Because if I tell her that it's OK and,
you know, in the moments when I do cry in front of my kids, I
have to remind myself it's OK. It's OK for them
(23:43):
to see me cry because I tell them that it's OK to cry.
Right. And so if you're not modeling and living that behavior,
Exactly, exactly. And there's nothing wrong
with feelings. And I expect, I expect the
next generation, because I think naturally like high performing
(24:05):
women, like we already have enough expectations for ourselves,
right? Like that we're trying to live up to. And it's like, oh my gosh, Traci Gia,
if every single one minute moment matters, what
if I screw up? Guess what? You're going to. You're going
to. The beautiful part about life is
the repair. Is it owning your
(24:27):
mistakes when you make them because nobody's perfect, and
then going to your child, repairing those, having that
tough conversation, owning your own stuff, and
saying, I didn't get that right. Like, will you please forgive me? Because
just to your point, you're modeling the type of behavior that
you want them to go out and do. We want a society and
(24:50):
a community of people who own their mistakes, not
who hide them under a rug, not who lie about them
and try to cover them up, not people who suppress those emotions.
Feelings are free. What you do next is what
makes you who you are. Feelings are free. So
if you're feeling overwhelmed, That's
(25:12):
everybody can feel overwhelmed, but it's a choice to
stay overwhelmed and to be overwhelmed and
Yeah. And just before we started recording this episode,
Traci, you and I were having a conversation and I would love to go back to that, you
know, speaking of being overwhelmed. I
(25:33):
love there's a there's a tool that you use or a
tip in terms of that language shift of being busy, right?
We still live in a bit of a hustle culture. There's still a lot of
pride in being busy. And it is
so overused. How are you? I'm busy. Well, we're all busy.
Yeah. So but you have a different take on it. So
(25:56):
Yeah. You know, I don't believe in the word busy.
I've completely removed it from my vocabulary. And
now I choose the word full. I live
a full life. I'm fulfilled in my full
life. Everything is full. Because to me, I
was using, like you mentioned, busyness as a
(26:17):
badge of honor and sort of like a pass. It
was like a get out of jail free card. And it was also just like this pass.
It's like, oh, I can't help you with XYZ because I'm
so busy. Or the first thing when you meet someone, you're like, oh,
I'm so busy. Where really, to me,
being busy makes me a victim. Like
(26:39):
I'm so busy. I don't have a choice in my life or
all the activities, which is a lie. We
have a choice that we can curate whatever type
of life that we want. So I choose to
live a full life. To me, that is
when I perform at my best. And especially as
(27:01):
women, I think we thrive in a
place of creation. I think it
is innately a part of our divine natures to be
creating. That doesn't mean that we have to take on
too much, but what we're all looking for is alignment. And
you can be creating an environment in your home.
(27:23):
You can be creating a culture within your family. You
can be creating things inside of your home and outside
of the home, one or the other or both. And
as long as you're feeling in alignment with
the things that you value, and I like to
call them energy generators, we take our mothers and daughters through
(27:45):
this little workshop of what are the three
things, list out three things that help you to, or
three things that are energy generators. that pour energy back
into you. Oftentimes it's recreation, but
if we're constantly checking things off of our to-do list and
not taking any time for those energy
(28:08):
generators for maybe a little recreation, then we're
going to always feel empty and depleted and burnt out
and overwhelmed because we're not honoring those things that we
value and those things that are regenerating our energy. Literally,
recreation is a recreation. It
recreates energy. And
(28:30):
oftentimes it even recreates time because
instead of just going down our to-do list and lamenting and
loathing and procrastinating all the things that we don't want to do, something
that probably could have taken us 10 minutes is now taking us 10 hours
because we're pushing it off, if we would have just adjusted
and made sure that we hit our energy generators first,
(28:54):
then you're like overflowing. You're in this constant state
of energy regeneration. So you have more than enough. You
have more than enough to give your family. You have more than enough to give
your businesses. And typically, if you're feeling
overwhelmed and you're feeling burnt out, it's
because you are not prioritizing your
(29:17):
energy generators. We just
had this mother-daughter workshop and I was talking with the CEO
of a high-end shoe line in New York. Her
eyes were about like this after we did this energy regeneration
exercise. She's like, I think my
(29:38):
day and the way I've scheduled myself is completely off.
She's like, that's why I feel like I'm up to here and I'm
just trying to tread water. And she's like,
I need to go back and make sure that I prioritize those
energy generators because then you're always feeling
(29:58):
fulfilled. You're literally overflowing and
you have more to give. And instead of giving our
families what's left of us, we
can give our families the best of us. Like
that, to your point, you were talking to me about success, like
that to me is success. is showing
(30:19):
up as the best version of yourself. And sometimes that requires
for women to push back a little bit, you know, on this sort
of self-sacrificing, you know, messaging that we sometimes get.
And, you know, because I think our children don't
need self-sacrificing martyrs. They
(30:39):
need sturdy leaders. And
the way we present them a sturdy leader is by first leading
ourselves. And there's no
shame in that. There's absolutely no shame in that at
all. It's actually the absolute best thing you could do for our children because
it's in your example that you're showing them how to live their
(31:02):
life. I mean, when we kind of take a step back and when
we kind of almost make it objective, if
we take an objective view at it and we step back and we say, okay,
children, okay, daughter, Honey, you can be whatever
you want to be in this world. Go after your dreams. You can be whatever
you want to be until you become a mom. Then
(31:23):
you need to sacrifice all of that. You
need to sacrifice your health. You need to sacrifice any
dreams that you had. The greatest gift we can give
our children is the gift of a mother who believes in herself and
goes after her dreams. I believe that with my
whole heart because we're modeling the behavior that
(31:45):
we wish to see in them. And so it's
a shift, it's a shift though. But
also I think there's a little bit of like this uprising. I
feel like there's sort of this new breed of mama that's like
being created from maybe some of these unhealthy
patterns. um, that we see in the world, or maybe
(32:07):
that we were raised with, or some of these kind of toxic labels that
we were, that we were surrounded by. Um, but I do, I
mean, mamas like you and, you know, like tons of
women that I work with. They're, they're wanting to
be those sturdy leaders that our children really need. And,
um, it's exciting. I really think there's like, it's
(32:30):
this exciting time to be a mom. And we were called
to be our children's mothers right now, in
a chaotic world when they need sturdy leaders.
Absolutely. I couldn't agree with you more. And I love, you know,
when we are able to, we do get mired down in the day to day and
we do live in a chaotic world. And, you know, there certainly is
(32:51):
no guidebook for parenting in 2020 forever,
forever. But, you know, I think one of the things that's important is
to take that step back and look at parenting
styles of our generation and the way we were raised and
then look at how you want your
children to raise their children, right? And
(33:14):
realize that we're at a pivotal inflection point where
we can really shift the trajectory of that
next generation. I mean, we're the ones feeling that squeeze, right?
But it is actually empowering. It's really powerful
It is. And you know, again, I
(33:36):
think I think moms, we also need to give
ourselves more credit. We're
doing amazing. We're awesome. All
the things that we're juggling and the thousand,
probably 2,000 items that run through our mind at any given moment,
(33:56):
at any given day, something that's helped me a
lot as an entrepreneur and as you
know, a high-performing woman and as a mom, is
giving myself some grace. Because I think as high-performing women,
we're always focused on like, what's next? Like, what's that
next goal? What's that next thing that
(34:17):
I'm working on? And we don't stop. Like,
we don't give ourselves permission to just stop and
like, look around and appreciate all
I think it's really easy for us to focus
on the one thing and the one area that we've fallen short
(34:40):
and not look at the other 99 things
that we've nailed and we've gotten right in our day.
You know, yeah, we definitely we're on to the next thing. Right. And
to your point, we don't stop and reflect and appreciate where we are, how far we've come,
the moment that we're in. And so I think giving ourselves that
grace is important. You know, it took my seven year old. It was a
(35:02):
beautiful moment. She reminded me of that exact point.
The other night she said to me, Mommy, you do so much
for us. And I was so caught
off guard when she said that because I don't expect my
seven-year-old to really know or understand the extent of all the
things we do to keep their world running, right? Safe and
(35:24):
healthy and happy. But she really took note
of it. And she's like, you do a lot. to keep
us, you know, keep everything together. And she's like,
you do a lot for us. And it was it was a beautiful moment. So
you really sometimes you don't realize how much they
(35:44):
And what a gift that she has. I'm sure you just wanted to like bottle it up
and drink with that like every day. But truly,
what a gift she has to see people. She
sees you. She sees your effort. That's
the thing. I think if moms, we can put on these gift goggles.
If I'm just going to put on these divine gift goggles and I'm going to go
(36:07):
throughout my day and my interactions with my kids, which
sometimes super suck. Other times are
super great. Yeah, if I can put on these divine gift goggles
and I can look for the divine gifts in my kids and then I
can talk about that with them and
I can identify it in them and I can celebrate that
(36:27):
gift in them. And it doesn't just stop with our children. Let's
put on those divine gift goggles when you and
I are talking and let's talk about each other's divine gifts. When we're around,
you know, other women out, you know, in
the entrepreneurial field or in our communities or in our churches, like,
let's stop looking through the goggles of comparison and
(36:49):
look at those divine gift goggles. And I think that
shifts, that just shifts the way that people show
up and they start walking around sort of with
this inner confidence like, wow, like people see
me and I have this divine gift and I have this self-worth
and this divine worth inside of me. Like my
(37:10):
life matters. Like what I'm doing here matters
and how I use that gift to bless other people matters. We're
not only trying to elevate and lift the community, but I
believe that, you know, we live on
after this life. Like what we do here matters and the
interactions that we have with our children and with, you
(37:32):
know, other people around us. It truly,
truly matters. How can we breathe
life and how can we light other people's candles?
That's what we teach our moms and our daughters and
that's what our community does. We light candles in
other people and that's how
(37:56):
you light the world. That's how we change the world.
The world right now is There's so much
darkness. There's just a lot of darkness. But like we
were talking about on these podcasts, you get to see those
little flickers of light. You get to see like amazing people
who who want to do good in the world, who want to use those divine
(38:17):
gifts to better the world and better other people. And that's
how we bring light to the world, you know, and
that's how we're going to get through some dark times that that are ahead
is knowing what our light is. and not dimming
it for anybody else, but letting it shine as bright as
possible. And if it's too bright for you, here you go. You can have my sunglasses.
(38:39):
Because, you know, like, if it's too bright for you, like, you're
not my person. I can still love you, like, from a
distance. Yeah. Step back and
watch from afar. Here's a pair of solar
I love it. I love it. So powerful. Traci, just
before we wrap up, what is one thing you want our listeners to
(39:01):
consider doing differently or changing after listening to
First of all, I want all you high performing mamas to
know that you're doing a great job. That if
you feel this little like, peeing, like,
I'm not doing that. I'm not getting that right. Or I messed
(39:23):
up. That's okay. You can make a
small little micro adjustment and do just a little bit better.
Look for those one minute moments in your day. Look
at your children and look at other women through
those divine gift goggles. And so
many things will change for you. And
(39:45):
put those divine gift goggles on and make sure to look in the mirror. Make
sure to look in the mirror and really identify
what your divine gift is and like sit in it. Sit
in it and own it and figure out how you can magnify
that. And if people go to my Instagram
(40:06):
at Mother Daughter Movement, there's a divine gift guide. It's
in one of my highlight bubbles. You could just go click on that and
it's a free download. and it walks you through
some questions to ask yourself to help you identify your divine gift.
It's a super fun activity to do with your daughters as
well. Oh, perfect. Yeah, because it's important. It's
(40:27):
really important to see that and to own it. And
also know it may take a little bit of reframing with
some of those labels that maybe you were given
Yeah, absolutely. I love that. Such great advice. And
Traci, you know, we talk a lot about success and redefining success on
(40:48):
this podcast. So I would love to know from your perspective, how do you define
success? What does that look like for you? And how
It's definitely evolved because I thought success was achievements
and accolades. Yeah. But
what I've come to learn and come to find out over 25 years of
(41:13):
of struggle and hardship and masterminds and
personal development and so many things is that
success is really honoring your values
as a woman. Because because
you were a woman before you were a mom. And
so making sure to honor those values, those
(41:35):
energy generators, that's how you live a fulfilled,
aligned life. is making sure that you're hitting
those three, and then you build your life around those.
And no matter what you choose to do, no matter where you fill in the
gaps, you're going to feel fulfilled. You're going to
feel happy. That is how we truly leave
(41:57):
a legacy, is honoring
and nurturing those values every day, every
week. And that's what's going to make you be able to
fulfill that potential. that God placed inside of you. Sure.
And that's really what success, that's how I've
redefined success is not
(42:19):
accolades or anything external and outside of me, but
it's really getting to learn to love myself and
to lean on God. And that's helped me to have true inner
confidence. So I'm that much more confident in raising the
Beautiful. So beautifully stated. Traci, where
(42:42):
Yes. So they can go to my Instagram at Mother Daughter
Movement. That's the Mother Daughter Movement page. And we actually
have a huge weekend connection summit
for mothers and daughters. So it's for daughters between the ages of nine and
12. Right during that age, they actually in their psychosocial development, they
(43:03):
are deciding between identity and confusion. Basically,
they're learning who they are. So we give
them lots of activities, lots of good interactions
with people, and we go through our woman lessons
on how to look inward and upward for their validation. And especially with
social media and especially with friendships and all
(43:25):
the chaos that's going on in the world, it's an amazing place for
you to invest in your relationship with your daughter, but
also to invest in the relationship with yourself. Because
we can take a girl to a camp and remove her from her environment
and make her feel all good and teach her all these skills and she's
feeling amazing. And then if we put her back in the
(43:48):
exact same environment, she'll slide back into some of
those similar patterns. And so again, this is just a beautiful, multi-generational
movement, mother-daughter movement, where mothers and daughters can come together
and personally develop, where they can work on their own
insecurities. But it is not like a deep, dark place.
This is like high action, lots of movement,
(44:11):
little 20-minute segments. We're doing, it's June
7th and 8th, so anybody can go to TraciPeterson.com. and
you can get all the information. It's going to be here in Utah. So it's going to be
an amazing mother daughter weekend, like with the mountains, we
can hook you up with hikes, all those things. But it's a day, it's
a day and a half event. Also, if
(44:32):
you're listening to me on this podcast, and
anything that Jay or I talked about resonated with you,
Go on to Instagram and send me a DM. If
you're like, I think I want to go to this, like reach out
to me. Nobody runs my social media. I do. So
we can get on a phone call. We can hop on a zoom. Let's talk about
(44:53):
how we can improve. your inner confidence, your
love of self, your relationship with God and
your relationship with your daughter. Reach out to me. Let's talk. Let's
get you the help you need. And if and if it's not a good fit,
this mother daughter movement for you, I can connect you with lots of other people that
(45:15):
Perfect. That sounds incredible. This has been such an empowering conversation.
Traci, I want to thank you for being here, for sharing your insights and your expertise.
You're amazing. Thanks for having me. Truly. You're such a good mama. And
what you're doing here is meaningful. And it's changing people's
Yeah, it's inspiring to see. Thank you. And of course, you can
(45:36):
visit my website at GiaLacqua.com. Reach out to me on Instagram at GiaLacqua.
Don't forget to subscribe, rate, and leave a review. This is Gia signing off
with gratitude for your time and energy. Our mic drops, but the movement
continues. Until next time, your next chapter is waiting. Take
care. That concludes another empowering episode of
Your Future Starts Now. Before we wrap up, I want to thank this
(45:57):
incredible community of high-achieving women. Your energy, resilience,
and commitment to growth are the driving force behind what we do.
If you enjoyed today's episode, please rate it, leave a review, and don't forget
to subscribe so you never miss an episode. Your feedback fuels our
mission to empower high-achieving women just like you. And of
course, share Your Future Starts Now with the extraordinary women in
(46:17):
your life who are also on a journey of healing and empowerment. Connect
with us on social media, share your thoughts, let us know what topics you'd like to
explore in future episodes. Stay connected on Instagram at
GiaLacqua. I encourage you to carry the energy of this conversation
into your day and keep on supporting the incredible women around you.
Welcome to Your Future Starts Now, the go-to podcast for
extraordinary women who are ready to step into their next chapter with
authentic confidence. I'm your host, Gia Lacqua, empowerment coach,
motivational speaker, children's book author, and girl mom. Whether
you're a corporate powerhouse or an entrepreneur, this show is
designed for you. Your Future Starts Now is more than
(00:20):
just a podcast. It's a movement, a movement towards rewriting
the rules of success for high-achieving women. Are you ready
to get unstuck and step into your next chapter? If
so, you are exactly where you need to be. Your future starts
now. Welcome to Your Future Starts Now. I'm
your host, Gia Lacqua. Thanks for joining us today. I am so
(00:42):
excited to introduce you to Traci Peterson. Traci
is an international speaker, highly sought after trainer, has
spoken to over 24,000 people, performs in front of 100,000 in
sports audiences. She's a board certified family nurse practitioner, founder,
CEO of Elevate Wellness and Aesthetics, She's treated
over 6,000 female patients and was awarded the number
(01:04):
one top team builder in 50 countries with Amare for
outstanding leadership and long-term team retention. Her
latest project is called BE, a mother-daughter movement grounded
in connection and protection. With collective medical wellness,
aesthetics, and leadership experience of 15 plus years, Traci is
widely regarded by her male and female peers patients, clients,
(01:26):
entrepreneurs, and moms alike. She helps high-performing women
and their daughters conquer self-criticism and comparison through
identifying their unique and divine gifts and finding
validation through learning to love yourself and to lean on
God. She helps people practically remember who they are
so they can confidently raise the next generation of leaders.
(01:55):
Yeah, I'm excited to chat with you today. So before we dive in,
so our listeners can get to know you a little bit better, tell us a little bit about
Yeah. I mean, I think, thank you for asking. I love
being able to share my story because I feel like we all have stories and
we all have sort of this evolution that we go through as women.
(02:17):
And so my background, I was raised in a really good
family. I would say that I was a high achiever from
a very young age. I'm a recovering perfectionist now.
I had those perfectionist tendencies very early on. In
my life, I always played sports and I always wanted to play with
the boys and all those good things. And
(02:42):
what I had and what I noticed is I had these natural
talents and these natural leadership gifts and abilities. And
I was celebrated for those like all throughout my life until
I reached the age of 14. And
I remember at the time, I
(03:03):
was waiting to hear the results of the student body
office class presidencies, and
I was sitting in that last period of the day, and
I swear I didn't even remember anything that that teacher said. I just heard the
ticking. of the clock, and I remember his
voice coming over the loudspeaker. And he said,
(03:25):
we have the winners of your student body officers. And
he read through Secretary Crystal Sorensen, Vice
President Sonny Dent, and your new student body
president is Traci Osler.
And I was like, Oh my gosh, it's amazing. And everybody in my class was
like jumping all around me and they were so excited and so happy for
(03:48):
me. And I was like, I won. Right. It's like what you want. And
I was so happy in that moment. And I remember walking out
in the hallway as a 14 year old girl and
walking up to my group of friends and they didn't know that
I was standing there. And they were like, I
can't even believe that she won anyway. Like she thinks she's so
(04:08):
great. And all of this, which obviously completely
broke my heart. And I was like, so
I went to somebody that I, that I loved looking
for, um, validation looking
for, um, just some, empathy
(04:29):
and love. And I said, why, why do these girls
have such a hard time with me? And this person
that I love and that I care about said, well, we've
been talking about it and we all agree that you're
too confident, you're too bossy, you're
too loud, and it makes people feel uncomfortable. Wow.
(04:53):
And so I think from that point on, I
started I started feeling
like it was my responsibility to make people around me
comfortable. Like I needed to lower
my natural gifts, like achieve, but don't achieve
too much to make people feel uncomfortable, which was really
(05:16):
a confusing place for me to be because I feel like,
you know, I had these natural leadership gifts and abilities. until
somebody said something. And I think many people,
especially women and men as well, we can trace it
back to something that somebody said or something that
somebody did where we were given this label that
(05:40):
created a limit within ourselves. And
I remember I would have this like response
anytime I heard the word bossy, I was like, No, like
it was like a trigger where I was like, no, no, no, I'm not bossy. I'm not bossy. No, no, no, I'm not.
I'm not bossy. And that carried on Gia for
probably like 20 years. It started this
(06:02):
sort of people pleasing, like looking for every
bit of validation in every accolade
and every achievement. It's like I became this hyper achiever
to try to fill this void and
this hole because I thought there was something wrong with me. I
(06:22):
thought there was something wrong with those gifts that
I innately had. And it wasn't until later on, that's why
I'm so impassioned about this mother-daughter movement,
because I think sometimes very, very
well-intentioned mothers, we can inadvertently project
our insecurities onto our daughters. And
(06:46):
so I wanted to create a
container and a community for mothers and
daughters where they could personally develop
together, where they could move from a place of insecurity to
surety about who they are, about
what gifts they have to give, and they can then support
(07:08):
one another in developing those gifts. So that's really where this
came from, is how can we liberate ourselves
from some of these limits? How can we avoid, as
mothers, projecting some of our insecurities onto our
daughters? And the way we do that is by continually developing
(07:28):
and working on our own insecurities, knowing that we have them, and
then continually be pouring into ourselves and
trying to gain
real inner confidence. And you find
that through validating self and finding that validation,
(07:49):
not in external people, but in
the internal and the eternal. It's by looking inward and
Such an incredible, incredible story. Thank you for sharing
that. Traci, there's so much there to unpack. First
of all, I mean, we know 14 year old girls can be brutal. And,
(08:10):
you know, although it was a very difficult, I
imagine, and challenging situation for you to navigate, it's
beautiful to see you on the other side of that, right, and
where it brought you in terms of pursuing your passion and
your purpose. So there is beauty in that. But
I want to go back to a couple of things that you said that are really super important.
(08:33):
So I think a lot of us have had similar experiences, and a lot of
our listeners can relate to those situations where we were too
much for somebody, right? Too loud, too
bossy, too confident, too silly, right?
And as kids, as you said,
sometimes it's inadvertent. Sometimes it's not intentional. It's
(08:54):
not meant to be malicious. But whether it's family
or friends, we get labeled. Yes. And
those labels stick and they stick with
us through childhood into adulthood when we are no longer that
same person. Exactly. And I see it all the time in
the clients that I work with. We hold on to them because they become
(09:16):
part of our identity. Right. And then you're afraid to let them go
because you're like, no, this is who I am. But the reality is
we're dynamic, fluid people and we change and
we evolve. And so but it's really hard to shed
those old layers and those old identities. So I
appreciate that you mentioned, you know, 20 years later, you still
(09:37):
had Right. And it drove some of those qualities that
also we, you know, I think everyone can also relate to the people pleasing and
the perfectionism. Right. And that external validation,
because we are trying to accommodate other people. We are
trying to make sure everybody, everybody around
us is comfortable. Right. That they are happy. And
(10:00):
what does that mean? We have to adapt. We have
to change who we are. and that light
that you bring to the world. If somebody says it's too bright, what
do we do? We turn it down. Totally. Right. And
so I love everything you just said. There's a couple of things you
mentioned. I would love to dig into a little bit more. You mentioned, you
(10:21):
know, having that sense of inner confidence and really
shifting to self validation away
from the external validation to self validation. So could you elaborate on
that a little bit more, those concepts and tips and tools you have for
Yeah, definitely. I think it goes back to
(10:42):
really looking inward and upward for your validation. So how
do you do that? Where do you start? I developed
these seven woman lessons in
order to help women and their daughters look inward and upward for
validation. Because my daughter, who's
11 now, I have an 11-year-old, a nine-year-old, and a six-year-old. But
(11:03):
when my 11-year-old daughter, Quinn, was nine, she
said to me, it was just regular after-school activities. The
TV was on, I was doing dishes. And she said, Mom, can
we do woman lessons? And I was like, It's
like, we can do women lessons, of course. Like as a
nine-year-old, what a mature question to ask. Can we do women lessons? And
(11:25):
I was like, yes. What does that mean to you? What
do you want to learn? And she said, well, I
want to learn how to do my makeup. I want to learn how to put together
an outfit. And I want to learn how to cook. And
my mama heart was like, that is so sweet. And
then this driving, entrepreneurial, powerful
(11:48):
woman was like, is
that all that she thinks that it is to be a woman? Is
what we look like and what we do? And I
was like, how? How can I teach her? how women
are so much more than that, how you can be a confident, a
self-assured, articulate, opinionated woman,
(12:10):
spirit-led, all of those things. Who do I want her
to grow up to be? And who am
I now? And what lessons did I have to
learn? What did it take for me to get here? And how
can I help her to avoid all those pitfalls
that I struggled with for over, what,
(12:33):
20, almost 30 years now? And and that's
what helped me to develop these seven woman lessons. And
so the base, the foundation of it is remembering who
you are. Because I think oftentimes as
parents, we have we have children and it's
less about us teaching them how to be an
(12:54):
adult and them reminding us how
to be more like a child. 100%. 100% because
I think if we all think back to a time in our life, and
I take my moms and my daughters through this, where
we close our eyes and we remember back to a time when
(13:15):
we were the most self-assured, the most happy, the most blissful,
the most filled with joy, and we didn't care what other
people thought about us. Usually it's right between
the ages of like six and eight. And
my mind takes me back to a time when I
was with my friends and I was seven years old
(13:38):
and I went to my best friend Stephanie's house and we were running
through the sprinklers. Like we had that long yellow slip and
slide and never once did I think What
swimming suit should I wear so it doesn't show my cellulite? What
friends are going to be there and are they more fit than me? Should I wear a one
piece? All of those insecurities that
(14:00):
pop up for us as women, which
is so unfortunate and it breaks my heart and it makes me so sad.
And I remember going to Stephanie's house and
walking into her backyard and my feet were greeted by
this cold, muddy hose water. Like
we all know that like freezing cold hose water and
(14:23):
you were like so grounded in the present moment
and you were so grateful to just be with your friends and
be alive and have this amazing able body
where you could run and jump and laugh and play and
you didn't once care what you looked like, what
somebody thought of you. You were just, you
(14:46):
were just able to be. Like, you are
just able to be. And that's why I actually named
this Mother Daughter Movement, BE. It's a place where you
can build belief in yourself and elevate
other people as you become who God created you to
be. And he created us and we started out
(15:06):
as just these amazing children, right?
And then the world sort of packs all of these labels
and everybody else projects their insecurities onto us. And
we sort of take those throughout our life. So I think at the base, at
the foundation, is remembering who you are
every day, reminding yourself who that young
(15:29):
girl was and who that young girl still is
inside of you. And then also
remembering whose you are. Like God created you
with very specific divine gifts for
a very specific reason. And I believe that each one
of us has a mission and a potential that only we
(15:50):
can fulfill. We were given certain trials,
certain hardships, certain gifts and abilities, and
we're meant to bless other people with those. And
so I think if we can identify and own
whatever that divine gift is, knowing that
the world sees you're different as difficult, but
(16:12):
God sees you're different as divine. And
going back to that example of when I was 14, I
learned how to become liberated from some of those limits through
reframing. So when I think, oh,
you're too bossy, I reframe and I say, actually,
I'm a master delegator. So there's no
(16:35):
longer this negative connotation with it. There is this
positive and uplifting thing that actually helps
to benefit society and helps to benefit my businesses and
helps to benefit my family. A lot of times women will
be told you're too emotional. No, it's
almost like you're setting up a boundary and you're saying no, like even
(16:56):
just saying no. That's a pattern interrupt as
well, right? You're saying, no, I'm choosing this. I don't
choose this. That doesn't serve me. I choose that. I'm
not too emotional. I'm actually incredibly empathetic, which
allows me to connect well to people. So it's
reframing some of those negative labels. And
(17:18):
that's how you become liberated from those things. And that's the thing. Whenever
somebody's like, Traci, you're
high maintenance. It's like, actually, I just know my value. Those
things don't trigger me anymore, Tia. If somebody calls me bossy, I'm
like, yes, I'm a mystery investigator. I
(17:39):
get crap done. That's what I do. Exactly. Those
are two of the lessons that we talk about, but the foundation is remembering who
you are and who you used to be and then
owning your divine gift and learning to relabel
some of those limits. And that's truly how we become liberated from
(17:59):
them. And it's such an empowering place to be. I think it's
honestly learning to love yourself.
we have to learn how to love ourselves again. And I think oftentimes
in, in the Christian community, sometimes we
forget, I think it's Matthew 22, when
(18:20):
we learn about like the two great commandments, there's a
little tag at the end of the second, right? We focus on
love God and love your neighbor as
you love yourself. We forget the,
as you love yourself and that
is critical, critical in
(18:41):
order for you to love your neighbor because you can't give
what you don't have. And the best
way to honor your creator is to love his
gifts. And you're one of his gifts. Like we
were created in the image of God. And so I
just think that divine relationship between
(19:02):
self and the creator is
invaluable. It's invaluable. So we talk about that a lot within
this mother-daughter movement, like setting up daily gratitude practices
to really kind of ground yourself in the present moment.
and really honoring and owning your divine gifts. And
(19:23):
then looking for those divine gifts in other women, too. I think
that's something that culture and society doesn't want us to do. They
typically pit us against each other. And it's
very competitive when it should be collaborative. And
the only way we change that is if we no longer
(19:45):
For sure. For sure. So much there and
so beautifully stated. You know, it's funny what you
just said resonated with me as a mother, because
my nine-year-old just the other day was watching one of her shows.
And after the show was over, she had gone to her room and I found her
sobbing. And I said, oh no, what
(20:07):
just happened? And she tells me that she's crying
about the episode. And I said, well, was it sad? And
she goes, yeah, but it ended up being a happy ending. And so I
said, okay, well, what's causing you to cry? There's really sad
music. And it finally dawned upon me that it's the first time
that she had experienced, like she had created such a connection with the characters that
(20:29):
she actually felt their sadness,
right? When you get really into a show or a movie and you like
feel what the characters are feeling, you go. It's the first time she experienced
that. And my initial reaction was
like, you know, don't be don't be don't be
too emotional. Right. That was my instinct was to
(20:50):
try to calm her down and say it's just a show. And then I
said, no, this kid is a highly
empathetic. Highly in tune with her emotions. And
that is one, just one of her many gifts that
this child is bringing to this world. Right. And
so it totally reframed how I just sat with
(21:12):
her and held her and let her cry. Right.
And just let her get it out. And so it was a really important
Absolutely. Absolutely. And good job. Like, good job
for you. Because I think that's what I'm trying to
empower these moms, these high performing women
(21:33):
with is to use these one minute moments. Yeah. use
those one minute moments to your advantage, to your
daughter's advantage. When I was standing at the counter and
my daughter asked me, can we do woman lessons? And
I want to learn how to cook, how to do my makeup and
how to put together an outfit. I could have been like, sure. Yeah,
(21:54):
cool. We can do that. Moving on to my next task. But
these one minute moments are speckled
throughout our day. And they're so foundational. and
so formative. And the way that you
responded in that moment was like a
thing of beauty. You allowed her to be
(22:18):
who God created her to be. You validated her
emotion in that moment, and emotions are beautiful. And
the fact that she could feel that, I love how deeply you
feel for people. It's just validating those emotions
that's so good. I mean, It's, again, we just have to be
careful, just so careful how the
(22:41):
words that we choose, because the words that we choose become
Yeah, for sure. For the rest of their life. For the rest
of their lives. And to your point, earlier point, it's, you know, what we
were taught and told growing up, we've grown
and evolved. And so that is a pattern interruption of itself, right?
(23:01):
You know, a lot of us were taught to suppress or ignore the
quote-unquote ugly feelings or the bad feelings or don't make other
people feel funny because you're sad or you're crying, right? And
so that is definitely a shift. It's a mindset shift to
say, no, we're going to embrace that sadness. We're going
to cry it out, right? And that's a significant shift,
(23:22):
but it is those moments exactly to
what you just said that make and shape who
they are as they grow up. And it's also modeling that behavior. Right.
Because if I tell her that it's OK and,
you know, in the moments when I do cry in front of my kids, I
have to remind myself it's OK. It's OK for them
(23:43):
to see me cry because I tell them that it's OK to cry.
Right. And so if you're not modeling and living that behavior,
Exactly, exactly. And there's nothing wrong
with feelings. And I expect, I expect the
next generation, because I think naturally like high performing
(24:05):
women, like we already have enough expectations for ourselves,
right? Like that we're trying to live up to. And it's like, oh my gosh, Traci Gia,
if every single one minute moment matters, what
if I screw up? Guess what? You're going to. You're going
to. The beautiful part about life is
the repair. Is it owning your
(24:27):
mistakes when you make them because nobody's perfect, and
then going to your child, repairing those, having that
tough conversation, owning your own stuff, and
saying, I didn't get that right. Like, will you please forgive me? Because
just to your point, you're modeling the type of behavior that
you want them to go out and do. We want a society and
(24:50):
a community of people who own their mistakes, not
who hide them under a rug, not who lie about them
and try to cover them up, not people who suppress those emotions.
Feelings are free. What you do next is what
makes you who you are. Feelings are free. So
if you're feeling overwhelmed, That's
(25:12):
everybody can feel overwhelmed, but it's a choice to
stay overwhelmed and to be overwhelmed and
Yeah. And just before we started recording this episode,
Traci, you and I were having a conversation and I would love to go back to that, you
know, speaking of being overwhelmed. I
(25:33):
love there's a there's a tool that you use or a
tip in terms of that language shift of being busy, right?
We still live in a bit of a hustle culture. There's still a lot of
pride in being busy. And it is
so overused. How are you? I'm busy. Well, we're all busy.
Yeah. So but you have a different take on it. So
(25:56):
Yeah. You know, I don't believe in the word busy.
I've completely removed it from my vocabulary. And
now I choose the word full. I live
a full life. I'm fulfilled in my full
life. Everything is full. Because to me, I
was using, like you mentioned, busyness as a
(26:17):
badge of honor and sort of like a pass. It
was like a get out of jail free card. And it was also just like this pass.
It's like, oh, I can't help you with XYZ because I'm
so busy. Or the first thing when you meet someone, you're like, oh,
I'm so busy. Where really, to me,
being busy makes me a victim. Like
(26:39):
I'm so busy. I don't have a choice in my life or
all the activities, which is a lie. We
have a choice that we can curate whatever type
of life that we want. So I choose to
live a full life. To me, that is
when I perform at my best. And especially as
(27:01):
women, I think we thrive in a
place of creation. I think it
is innately a part of our divine natures to be
creating. That doesn't mean that we have to take on
too much, but what we're all looking for is alignment. And
you can be creating an environment in your home.
(27:23):
You can be creating a culture within your family. You
can be creating things inside of your home and outside
of the home, one or the other or both. And
as long as you're feeling in alignment with
the things that you value, and I like to
call them energy generators, we take our mothers and daughters through
(27:45):
this little workshop of what are the three
things, list out three things that help you to, or
three things that are energy generators. that pour energy back
into you. Oftentimes it's recreation, but
if we're constantly checking things off of our to-do list and
not taking any time for those energy
(28:08):
generators for maybe a little recreation, then we're
going to always feel empty and depleted and burnt out
and overwhelmed because we're not honoring those things that we
value and those things that are regenerating our energy. Literally,
recreation is a recreation. It
recreates energy. And
(28:30):
oftentimes it even recreates time because
instead of just going down our to-do list and lamenting and
loathing and procrastinating all the things that we don't want to do, something
that probably could have taken us 10 minutes is now taking us 10 hours
because we're pushing it off, if we would have just adjusted
and made sure that we hit our energy generators first,
(28:54):
then you're like overflowing. You're in this constant state
of energy regeneration. So you have more than enough. You
have more than enough to give your family. You have more than enough to give
your businesses. And typically, if you're feeling
overwhelmed and you're feeling burnt out, it's
because you are not prioritizing your
(29:17):
energy generators. We just
had this mother-daughter workshop and I was talking with the CEO
of a high-end shoe line in New York. Her
eyes were about like this after we did this energy regeneration
exercise. She's like, I think my
(29:38):
day and the way I've scheduled myself is completely off.
She's like, that's why I feel like I'm up to here and I'm
just trying to tread water. And she's like,
I need to go back and make sure that I prioritize those
energy generators because then you're always feeling
(29:58):
fulfilled. You're literally overflowing and
you have more to give. And instead of giving our
families what's left of us, we
can give our families the best of us. Like
that, to your point, you were talking to me about success, like
that to me is success. is showing
(30:19):
up as the best version of yourself. And sometimes that requires
for women to push back a little bit, you know, on this sort
of self-sacrificing, you know, messaging that we sometimes get.
And, you know, because I think our children don't
need self-sacrificing martyrs. They
(30:39):
need sturdy leaders. And
the way we present them a sturdy leader is by first leading
ourselves. And there's no
shame in that. There's absolutely no shame in that at
all. It's actually the absolute best thing you could do for our children because
it's in your example that you're showing them how to live their
(31:02):
life. I mean, when we kind of take a step back and when
we kind of almost make it objective, if
we take an objective view at it and we step back and we say, okay,
children, okay, daughter, Honey, you can be whatever
you want to be in this world. Go after your dreams. You can be whatever
you want to be until you become a mom. Then
(31:23):
you need to sacrifice all of that. You
need to sacrifice your health. You need to sacrifice any
dreams that you had. The greatest gift we can give
our children is the gift of a mother who believes in herself and
goes after her dreams. I believe that with my
whole heart because we're modeling the behavior that
(31:45):
we wish to see in them. And so it's
a shift, it's a shift though. But
also I think there's a little bit of like this uprising. I
feel like there's sort of this new breed of mama that's like
being created from maybe some of these unhealthy
patterns. um, that we see in the world, or maybe
(32:07):
that we were raised with, or some of these kind of toxic labels that
we were, that we were surrounded by. Um, but I do, I
mean, mamas like you and, you know, like tons of
women that I work with. They're, they're wanting to
be those sturdy leaders that our children really need. And,
um, it's exciting. I really think there's like, it's
(32:30):
this exciting time to be a mom. And we were called
to be our children's mothers right now, in
a chaotic world when they need sturdy leaders.
Absolutely. I couldn't agree with you more. And I love, you know,
when we are able to, we do get mired down in the day to day and
we do live in a chaotic world. And, you know, there certainly is
(32:51):
no guidebook for parenting in 2020 forever,
forever. But, you know, I think one of the things that's important is
to take that step back and look at parenting
styles of our generation and the way we were raised and
then look at how you want your
children to raise their children, right? And
(33:14):
realize that we're at a pivotal inflection point where
we can really shift the trajectory of that
next generation. I mean, we're the ones feeling that squeeze, right?
But it is actually empowering. It's really powerful
It is. And you know, again, I
(33:36):
think I think moms, we also need to give
ourselves more credit. We're
doing amazing. We're awesome. All
the things that we're juggling and the thousand,
probably 2,000 items that run through our mind at any given moment,
(33:56):
at any given day, something that's helped me a
lot as an entrepreneur and as you
know, a high-performing woman and as a mom, is
giving myself some grace. Because I think as high-performing women,
we're always focused on like, what's next? Like, what's that
next goal? What's that next thing that
(34:17):
I'm working on? And we don't stop. Like,
we don't give ourselves permission to just stop and
like, look around and appreciate all
I think it's really easy for us to focus
on the one thing and the one area that we've fallen short
(34:40):
and not look at the other 99 things
that we've nailed and we've gotten right in our day.
You know, yeah, we definitely we're on to the next thing. Right. And
to your point, we don't stop and reflect and appreciate where we are, how far we've come,
the moment that we're in. And so I think giving ourselves that
grace is important. You know, it took my seven year old. It was a
(35:02):
beautiful moment. She reminded me of that exact point.
The other night she said to me, Mommy, you do so much
for us. And I was so caught
off guard when she said that because I don't expect my
seven-year-old to really know or understand the extent of all the
things we do to keep their world running, right? Safe and
(35:24):
healthy and happy. But she really took note
of it. And she's like, you do a lot. to keep
us, you know, keep everything together. And she's like,
you do a lot for us. And it was it was a beautiful moment. So
you really sometimes you don't realize how much they
(35:44):
And what a gift that she has. I'm sure you just wanted to like bottle it up
and drink with that like every day. But truly,
what a gift she has to see people. She
sees you. She sees your effort. That's
the thing. I think if moms, we can put on these gift goggles.
If I'm just going to put on these divine gift goggles and I'm going to go
(36:07):
throughout my day and my interactions with my kids, which
sometimes super suck. Other times are
super great. Yeah, if I can put on these divine gift goggles
and I can look for the divine gifts in my kids and then I
can talk about that with them and
I can identify it in them and I can celebrate that
(36:27):
gift in them. And it doesn't just stop with our children. Let's
put on those divine gift goggles when you and
I are talking and let's talk about each other's divine gifts. When we're around,
you know, other women out, you know, in
the entrepreneurial field or in our communities or in our churches, like,
let's stop looking through the goggles of comparison and
(36:49):
look at those divine gift goggles. And I think that
shifts, that just shifts the way that people show
up and they start walking around sort of with
this inner confidence like, wow, like people see
me and I have this divine gift and I have this self-worth
and this divine worth inside of me. Like my
(37:10):
life matters. Like what I'm doing here matters
and how I use that gift to bless other people matters. We're
not only trying to elevate and lift the community, but I
believe that, you know, we live on
after this life. Like what we do here matters and the
interactions that we have with our children and with, you
(37:32):
know, other people around us. It truly,
truly matters. How can we breathe
life and how can we light other people's candles?
That's what we teach our moms and our daughters and
that's what our community does. We light candles in
other people and that's how
(37:56):
you light the world. That's how we change the world.
The world right now is There's so much
darkness. There's just a lot of darkness. But like we
were talking about on these podcasts, you get to see those
little flickers of light. You get to see like amazing people
who who want to do good in the world, who want to use those divine
(38:17):
gifts to better the world and better other people. And that's
how we bring light to the world, you know, and
that's how we're going to get through some dark times that that are ahead
is knowing what our light is. and not dimming
it for anybody else, but letting it shine as bright as
possible. And if it's too bright for you, here you go. You can have my sunglasses.
(38:39):
Because, you know, like, if it's too bright for you, like, you're
not my person. I can still love you, like, from a
distance. Yeah. Step back and
watch from afar. Here's a pair of solar
I love it. I love it. So powerful. Traci, just
before we wrap up, what is one thing you want our listeners to
(39:01):
consider doing differently or changing after listening to
First of all, I want all you high performing mamas to
know that you're doing a great job. That if
you feel this little like, peeing, like,
I'm not doing that. I'm not getting that right. Or I messed
(39:23):
up. That's okay. You can make a
small little micro adjustment and do just a little bit better.
Look for those one minute moments in your day. Look
at your children and look at other women through
those divine gift goggles. And so
many things will change for you. And
(39:45):
put those divine gift goggles on and make sure to look in the mirror. Make
sure to look in the mirror and really identify
what your divine gift is and like sit in it. Sit
in it and own it and figure out how you can magnify
that. And if people go to my Instagram
(40:06):
at Mother Daughter Movement, there's a divine gift guide. It's
in one of my highlight bubbles. You could just go click on that and
it's a free download. and it walks you through
some questions to ask yourself to help you identify your divine gift.
It's a super fun activity to do with your daughters as
well. Oh, perfect. Yeah, because it's important. It's
(40:27):
really important to see that and to own it. And
also know it may take a little bit of reframing with
some of those labels that maybe you were given
Yeah, absolutely. I love that. Such great advice. And
Traci, you know, we talk a lot about success and redefining success on
(40:48):
this podcast. So I would love to know from your perspective, how do you define
success? What does that look like for you? And how
It's definitely evolved because I thought success was achievements
and accolades. Yeah. But
what I've come to learn and come to find out over 25 years of
(41:13):
of struggle and hardship and masterminds and
personal development and so many things is that
success is really honoring your values
as a woman. Because because
you were a woman before you were a mom. And
so making sure to honor those values, those
(41:35):
energy generators, that's how you live a fulfilled,
aligned life. is making sure that you're hitting
those three, and then you build your life around those.
And no matter what you choose to do, no matter where you fill in the
gaps, you're going to feel fulfilled. You're going to
feel happy. That is how we truly leave
(41:57):
a legacy, is honoring
and nurturing those values every day, every
week. And that's what's going to make you be able to
fulfill that potential. that God placed inside of you. Sure.
And that's really what success, that's how I've
redefined success is not
(42:19):
accolades or anything external and outside of me, but
it's really getting to learn to love myself and
to lean on God. And that's helped me to have true inner
confidence. So I'm that much more confident in raising the
Beautiful. So beautifully stated. Traci, where
(42:42):
Yes. So they can go to my Instagram at Mother Daughter
Movement. That's the Mother Daughter Movement page. And we actually
have a huge weekend connection summit
for mothers and daughters. So it's for daughters between the ages of nine and
12. Right during that age, they actually in their psychosocial development, they
(43:03):
are deciding between identity and confusion. Basically,
they're learning who they are. So we give
them lots of activities, lots of good interactions
with people, and we go through our woman lessons
on how to look inward and upward for their validation. And especially with
social media and especially with friendships and all
(43:25):
the chaos that's going on in the world, it's an amazing place for
you to invest in your relationship with your daughter, but
also to invest in the relationship with yourself. Because
we can take a girl to a camp and remove her from her environment
and make her feel all good and teach her all these skills and she's
feeling amazing. And then if we put her back in the
(43:48):
exact same environment, she'll slide back into some of
those similar patterns. And so again, this is just a beautiful, multi-generational
movement, mother-daughter movement, where mothers and daughters can come together
and personally develop, where they can work on their own
insecurities. But it is not like a deep, dark place.
This is like high action, lots of movement,
(44:11):
little 20-minute segments. We're doing, it's June
7th and 8th, so anybody can go to TraciPeterson.com. and
you can get all the information. It's going to be here in Utah. So it's going to be
an amazing mother daughter weekend, like with the mountains, we
can hook you up with hikes, all those things. But it's a day, it's
a day and a half event. Also, if
(44:32):
you're listening to me on this podcast, and
anything that Jay or I talked about resonated with you,
Go on to Instagram and send me a DM. If
you're like, I think I want to go to this, like reach out
to me. Nobody runs my social media. I do. So
we can get on a phone call. We can hop on a zoom. Let's talk about
(44:53):
how we can improve. your inner confidence, your
love of self, your relationship with God and
your relationship with your daughter. Reach out to me. Let's talk. Let's
get you the help you need. And if and if it's not a good fit,
this mother daughter movement for you, I can connect you with lots of other people that
(45:15):
Perfect. That sounds incredible. This has been such an empowering conversation.
Traci, I want to thank you for being here, for sharing your insights and your expertise.
You're amazing. Thanks for having me. Truly. You're such a good mama. And
what you're doing here is meaningful. And it's changing people's
Yeah, it's inspiring to see. Thank you. And of course, you can
(45:36):
visit my website at GiaLacqua.com. Reach out to me on Instagram at GiaLacqua.
Don't forget to subscribe, rate, and leave a review. This is Gia signing off
with gratitude for your time and energy. Our mic drops, but the movement
continues. Until next time, your next chapter is waiting. Take
care. That concludes another empowering episode of
Your Future Starts Now. Before we wrap up, I want to thank this
(45:57):
incredible community of high-achieving women. Your energy, resilience,
and commitment to growth are the driving force behind what we do.
If you enjoyed today's episode, please rate it, leave a review, and don't forget
to subscribe so you never miss an episode. Your feedback fuels our
mission to empower high-achieving women just like you. And of
course, share Your Future Starts Now with the extraordinary women in
(46:17):
your life who are also on a journey of healing and empowerment. Connect
with us on social media, share your thoughts, let us know what topics you'd like to
explore in future episodes. Stay connected on Instagram at
GiaLacqua. I encourage you to carry the energy of this conversation
into your day and keep on supporting the incredible women around you.
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