Special Announcement #1
Attend the Legendary Summer Intensive
Featuring Drs. David Burns and Jill Levitt
August 8 - 11. 2024
Learn Advanced TEAM-CBT skills
Heal yourself, heal your patients
First Intensive in 5 years!
It will knock your socks off!
Limited Seating--Act Fast
Click for registration / more information!
Sadly, this workshop is a training program which will be limited to therapists and mental health professionals and graduate students in a mental health field Apologies, but therapists have complained when non-therapists have attended our continuing education training programs. This is partly because of the intimate nature of the small group exercises and the personal work the therapists may do during the workshop. Certified coaches and counselors are welcome to attend.
Special Announcement #2
Here's some GREAT news! The Feeling Great App is now available in both app stores (IOS and Android) and is for therapists and the general public, and you can take a ride for free! Check it
Today's Ask David Podcast
We have lots of great questions today. The answers in the show notes were written prior to the podcast, and the answers in the live podcast as we discussed these questions may differ somewhat or amplify the written materials in these show notes.
We love your questions. Remember to send them to David@feelinggood.com.
Ask David Questions for Today
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Bosley asks: My father can be very critical of my plans for the future. What’s the best way to respond to him?
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Willie asks: I have a dating questions. Why do women keep ghosting me? Should they be more willing to work out differences with the Five Secrets of Communication?
1. Bosley asks: My father can be very critical of my plans for the future. What’s the best way to respond to him?
"To explain somewhat concisely, I just want to move to the nearest major city (Seattle) since I feel really really happy there. I also love volunteering for a specific organization and have some community there that I care about, and I feel very isolated having been away from for months.
I'm willing to carry the load of all the work I would need to do to make it happen, and do a business training my dad wants me to complete.
He has other thoughts. He looks down on volunteering and his thoughts on friends are simply that I can make new ones anyway. He is very aggressive and intimidating in his arguments, full of insults and many factually incorrect statements that are difficult to disarm on the fly.
He shoots down the idea upon mention, so it's difficult to collaborate to find mutually beneficial solutions. He is a successful businessman, despite recent financial issues, and has a sort of strict plan for me that he has wanted me to follow, although I really don't feel this conflicts with his goals to have me run things in the future.
I'm just worried since he has a long past of being emotionally abusive and of going back on his word. Plus, I just want some autonomy.
In the end, it's his way or the highway. He says “You keep scheming and going down a twisted path instead of doing what I tell you.”
David’s reply
I suggested he might complete the first four steps of the Relationship Journal so we could see how he’s communicating with his dad. Here is Bosley’s partially partially completed Relationship Journal (showing steps 1 to 4, but not 5.)
| Step 1 – S/he said: Write down exactly what the other person said. Be brief: You keep scheming and going down a twisted path instead of doing what I tell you! | Step 2 – I said: Write down exactly what you said next. Be brief: What? |
| Circle or bold the emotions S/HE might have been feeling | Circle or bold the emotions YOU were feeling |