Grace In The Luteal Phase | Mid Week Tease - Legally Clueless

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to the midwi Te's with me adele Jangle, where
I share some random and not two random thoughts on things.
And in this episode, let's talk about the luteal phase.
Mm hmm. I'm going to go there because I've had it.
I'm smack in the middle of it, and I'm just

(00:20):
like where but I finally figured out how to have
a better handle of it. Okay, rewind. Let me start
from the very beginning. Have you ever had those days
when you're doing everything right, You are doing everything according
to your schedule. If you normally wake up and do

(00:40):
a morning walk like me, you're trying to do that.
If you normally wake up in the morning and you
are doing your exercise routine, or you know, you're packing
your lunches, or you're getting ready for work, whatever your
routine looks like you are trying desperately to do it right.
And probably yesterday and the day before you were doing it.

(01:04):
You were killing whatever is on your routine, whatever is
on your to do list, and then all of a sudden,
today you're trying to do the same damn thing, but
out of nowhere, your energy just drops. Your body feels sluggier,
even heavier, your emotions are closer to the surface. For

(01:26):
those of you who love crying like me, your tears
are just they're waiting, ready to pop out. And you
can even find yourself doubting yourself. Lord, I know that
feeling so well. For so many years, I used to
beat myself up whenever these feelings would pop up. I

(01:48):
would call myself lazy, call myself unproductive, call myself to emotional,
say that I'm failing at things, and really just talk
down and harshly to myself until I learned what my
body was actually trying to tell me. So today I
want to talk about grace really, that really is what

(02:11):
it is, and specifically how we as women can be
more graceful with ourselves during our menstrual cycle, especially during
the luteal phase. You know that stretch of time before
our period starts when we often feel most unlike ourselves.

(02:33):
Sometimes we feel unworthy. Sometimes we feel like we're just
not doing well enough. We're not doing the things we
used to be able to do just a couple of
days or a week ago, you know what I mean
that phase. Let's first start by understanding the luteal phase, right,
It usually happens after ovulation and before your period. What's

(02:55):
happening is your progesterone levels rise and your body starts
preparing for men's and physically, what you might start to
feel is more tired. Oh my god, can I I'm
smack in the middle of this phase and the exhaustion,
and it has come when we're shooting season three of

(03:15):
four Mannerless Women. We're shooting another show that's going to
be coming on our network very soon. Yeah, I'm tired.
You could feel bloated. I used to get very bloated
during this period, but then I noticed that whenever I
take probiotic yogurt, I don't feel it. Emotionally, Hey, during

(03:42):
this phase, I am so much more sensitive, so much
more like, hey, one small thing, and I'm just like, well,
I'm taking it with a heavy pinch of salt. I'm
more reflective, I am I found even with my person

(04:05):
I'm less patient. I'm like noticing everything and reading so
much more into it that I need to be. And
I think, I also, which is so out of my character.
I withdraw this particular luteal phase that I'm going through.
I don't even want to talk to people, which is
crazy because I love chatting. I'm one of the few

(04:29):
people who even loved small talk, right, But I recently
got better at extending grace to myself during this period
after downloading And this is not a this is not
a sponsored ad or anything, but I downloaded this app
called Bell to track my period. I never used to

(04:52):
track my period on an app per se. I would
just rely on certain tell tale signs that my b
you would give me two weeks before a week before,
and my body used to be like clockwork. It still
is to a huge percent, but because of other complications
I have. I downloaded this app called Bell because I

(05:13):
was like, I want to get serious about tracking, and
I also want to notice the luteal phase specifically. And
if I and I thought, if I better understand it,
if I know when it's happening, I can be more
graceful with myself. Right. And just these few couple of
months that I've been tracking and monitoring, and the app

(05:36):
actually tells you what phase you're in, so I know
when I'm in the luteal phase. I've noticed that when
I know I am more graceful with myself, right, I
start to acknowledge that there's nothing wrong with me, that
my body isn't broken, that my body's actually working hard
right even though I'm feeling like shit. My body is

(06:00):
doing something sacred. It's doing important, behind the scenes work,
and that deserves grace, not guilt, and not shame. But
it's not always easy. It's not always easy because we
live in a world that we words consistency, in a

(06:21):
world where productivity is praised and rest is questioned even
looked down upon. You know, It's like taking a break
or taking it slow is synonymous with being lazy in
the world that we're living now, which is just wrong.
We're expected to show up the same way every single

(06:44):
day at work, in relationships, creatively, in our businesses. Yet
as women, our bodies are designed to change, you know.
So I used to push through every cycle and ignore
my body's cues and then feel like I'm not showing
up as well as I used to, I'm not doing enough,

(07:07):
I'm being unproductive, I'm being lazy, and then I just
feel burnt out. I would get so irritable or i'd
panic because I'd feel like have I lost my spark?
You know what's happening. But let me tell you, especially
since tracking I have begun to really understand the rhythm
of my body, and I just kind of realized nothing

(07:31):
is off during this period. Like I'm talking to you
now smack in the middle of my luteal face, and
I am acknowledging that I'm moving a lot slower than
I did, let's say, last week. But that doesn't mean
I'm lazy. That doesn't mean I'm off, that doesn't mean
I'm not serious. It just means the amount of work

(07:56):
my body is doing internally, behind the scenes, sacred work,
requires me in this moment to move a little slower,
and that's okay. It is okay for me to flow
with my body and not against it. I don't know
if you've noticed the Legally Clueless podcast episode this week

(08:17):
went out a little later than usual. This particular midweek
TIS episode is going out a couple of hours later
than it usually does. I'm not shaming myself. I'm not
guilting myself that I'm taking longer than usual to approve
certain edits, to approve certain copy or whatever for things

(08:37):
to go out. I'm aware of the phase I'm in,
and I'm saying, hey, you know, I'm gonna do it
for sure. It's gonna get done. It might be four
hours later than it was last week, and that's because
my body is doing incredible work right now and I'm

(08:57):
flowing with it, not against And so like my number
one ask of you, as a woman who is listening
to this is to track your cycle. Not for you
to get pedantic about it or anal about it, but
for you to just know, especially with the luteal phase,

(09:18):
my goodness, to just know I get it's I'm not
gonna share on myself. I understand exactly what's happening in
my body right now, and so I want to share
with you five ways that you can practice grace during
your luteal phase. And these are some ways that I

(09:40):
practice grace so tried and test it. The first one
is to rest intentionally. Instead of calling it being lazy,
I just remind myself that rest is actually part of
the work. I think in season two of for Manalist Women,
one of our guests in Gashin said, if you are
not productive with rest, you're not going to be productive

(10:04):
with work. So you've got to rest to the best
of your ability. And I am so shameless during my
luteal phase, like I literally have been on calls with
a colleague and when I'm ending the call, I'm saying, hey,
if you're not able to reach me in the next
hour and a half, like over the next hour and
a half, it'll be because I'm taking my afternoon nap. Yeah. Yeah,

(10:27):
shamelessly man, shamelesslie. The second tip are just your rhythm.
Now that you know the phase that you're in, this
isn't the time for you to force big creative ideas
and pushes. It's time for reflection. It's time for you

(10:48):
to maybe tie up loose ends, do soft planning, delegate
a bit more, which is what I'm doing. I am
in the middle of, you know, launching a business, another business,
and expanding this current business. And I've taken a week

(11:09):
off literally the people suppliers that I've been talking to.
I said, hey, let's circle back in a week. I've adjusted.
I've adjusted my rhythm, and nothing is going to die,
nothing is going to go up in flames because I've
done that. I'm honoring my body, which brings me to
the third tip. Nurture your body, meet your body where

(11:32):
it's at, Give your body warm foods, stretch. Oh my god,
let me tell you my morning walks because I go
up three really steep hills. I just feel my body stretching,
and I'm like, yes, I'm giving you what you need
right now. You could journal. Journaling is incredible for the mind,

(11:54):
even which is what I love. Drink your brood hubble teas.
I love making my hibiscus tea from scratch. I boil
the hibiscus petals, I cut up ground and ground ground.
I cut up and grind my ginger and I pour

(12:18):
it in there. I had a bit of honey and
I brew it. And that always makes my body feel
safe when I just give it this tea that we love,
you know, nurture your body. Number four, Hey, this one,
Please pay attention. If there's only one thing you take
from this episode, let it be this. Watch yourself talk.

(12:40):
Please watch it. The luteal phase can make your inner
critic louder than ever. It's like giving it a megaphone.
And when you notice that, try responding with compassion instead
of criticism. So, for example, I walk every morning. I

(13:00):
do a morning walk that is between seven thousand to
ten thousand steps. During my luteal phase. There's some days
I am so tired, I can't even wake up and
do my morning walk. Before, when I wasn't tracking and
I didn't know which phase I was in of my cycle,

(13:22):
my inner critic would shit on me the days that
I am just too tired because of the work my
body is doing to go for my walk. Do you
know what has changed now? I want to say maybe
a day. Actually yesterday. Yesterday my alarm rang and the
first thing I normally do is gone my morning walk.

(13:44):
And I was for two minutes going back and forth
with my body trying to see can I make it?
Can I not? Can I make it? And my inner
voice was the kindest, kindest I've ever been. What I
thought was, Hey, you know what I I think you
can try. Let's try, and even if we do have
that's good. My inner voice was reminding me, Hey, remember

(14:08):
how much you like the crisp early morning breeze hitting
your face. I really love that feeling. I can't explain
to you why, but I love it. It's one of my
favorite things, favorite ways of starting the day, specifically that feeling.
And my inner voice reminded me of that and said,
you know, maybe that's all we do. Let's just go

(14:29):
and get that fix of that thing. We like, and
literally my inner voice said, I think you can do it.
Let's give it a try. And even if we already
do fifty percent of our normal walk, hey we tried
compassion instead of criticism. And the fifth tip is ask

(14:50):
for softness. Let me tell you, the people around you
want to be there for you. They really do. But
you got to reach out first. You have to ask
whether it looks like you're communicating your needs to your
partner or you simply saying no. You're allowed to make
a space for yourself. And I'll give you an example
of two things I've done during this phase. As I

(15:11):
mentioned earlier, I am working on expanding this business and
finally ruling out something fun. Okay, that's all I can
say right now, and it involves me shipping in samples,
and I just did not have the energy to go
and pick the samples. I was stretched thin because of

(15:35):
the work that I was doing. A Normally I wouldn't
delegate tasks like this to someone else because control freak
and then excitement, right, But I just knew I don't
have it in me during this phase, and I really

(15:55):
just reached out to my person and said, hey, I
need to help I don't have the capacity for ABCD.
Can you go and do this for me? In a heartbeat?
They did another thing. During this phase, my bloatedness was
like I was feeling a bit of crambs. But it

(16:19):
wasn't cramps. It was just discomfort, to be honest, and
I vocalized it. And I live in the middle of nowhere,
so even trying to get a hot water bottle around here,
all of the best, all of the best, you know,
and I vocalized this need, it was met by someone
who wanted to immediately, you know, help, and they did.

(16:45):
Another thing is even on a good day. I hate
WhatsApp groups, I really do. And I was recently added
into WhatsApp group that I didn't want to be in,
and I didn't realize that my What's Up settings on
my private line I were insecure. So if you added
me to a group, it would just accept. Do you
know what I did? I left because I knew not

(17:09):
only do I not like what'sapp groups in general, but
right now I do not want the noise all of
notifications and people talking blah blah blah. As I said earlier,
I experience wanting to withdraw right so the little energy
I have now or bandwidth, I am saving it for

(17:32):
my work that includes speaking to you, speaking to guests
because we're in the middle of or about to start
shooting season two, or for manalist women tomorrow. So ask
for softness, but also give yourself the softness. You are
allowed to make space for yourself as you are doing

(17:53):
your luteal phase. So this week I want to leave
you with this thought. What would it look like if
instead of fighting your body you started flowing with it.
What if every time your energy shifted, instead of panicking,
you paused and you told yourself, I am allowed to

(18:17):
slow down. Grace isn't passive, right, It's quite active. It's
a doing thing. It's an act of partnership with your body,
and I think that's one of the most powerful kinds
of self love. But more than anything other than the
tips I've given you track your cycle so that you

(18:37):
know exactly when you and your body and your mind
are needing of more grace than guilt. Now, if this
episode resonated with you, make sure you share it with
another woman who needs to be reminded that slowing down
is not failure, it's it's actually wisdom. It's actually wisdom.

(18:59):
I will also get give you one last heads up
of something that we're doing if you want to continue
on this wellness journey. Here we look at wellness mental, physical,
but also financial and so our last wellness talk of
the year is this Saturday, the twenty fifth of October.

(19:19):
My favorite money educator, Susan Ronjikou is going to be
the guest speaker and she's going to be helping us
unpack smart money strategies for entrepreneurs and freelancers, so from
money boundaries to building financial safety nets for your business
and yourself, splitting personal finances, business finances, and what I

(19:44):
love about Susan is she always has practical tips and
tools that she gives us. Tickets are just a thousand bob.
They are available there's a link in the show notes,
but our ticket portal closes at three pm East Africa
time on Thursday, the twenty third of October, so make

(20:06):
sure you grab your ticket asup and always remember you
are enough, you're worthy, and you are loved. Thanks for
listening to the Midwik T's a Legally Clueless Africa production.
Episodes go out every Wednesday, and you can learn more
about us by going to legally clueless africa dot com

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Grace In The Luteal Phase | Mid Week Tease

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