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October 11, 2022 74 mins

A paradox - something that makes sense but doesn’t make sense - is the only way to describe how living a messy, challenging life makes it a better one. Choices born of naivety, insecurity, and the awful-beautiful-unthinking way a young adult navigates the world is how it went for me. A need to feel loved, a fast engagement, and back-to-back pregnancies are what happened; addiction, disability, and death are what made it interesting. We don’t plan for messy - we plan for perfection, but the messiness of the human experience is where the gold is. Messy is what sets you up for humility, empathy, connection, and gratitude. Messy is what allows you to arrive in new spaces & places with a sense of purpose and preparedness. Messy is what has made my life hard and meaningful and scary and worth living. See? Paradox at its finest. 

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