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September 7, 2025 40 mins

What does it say about you when someone's failure to use a turn signal sends you into a rage? Or when the sound of someone chewing makes your skin crawl? In this engaging conversation, we dive deep into the psychology behind our pet peeves and what they reveal about our values and expectations.

The hosts share their most triggering annoyances – from drivers who don't signal to people typing loudly on keyboards, from inappropriate workplace attire to individuals taking loud personal calls in public spaces. What emerges is a fascinating pattern: most pet peeves stem from a fundamental desire for consideration from others. When someone cuts us off without signaling, they're breaking an unspoken social contract that prioritizes collective safety and predictability.

We tackle the awkward conversations nobody wants to have – like addressing hygiene issues in the workplace or enforcing dress codes without crossing lines. How do you tell a coworker they need to shower more frequently? Is there a tactful way to suggest someone's outfit might be inappropriate for the office? The hosts share their real-world experiences navigating these delicate situations with empathy while still maintaining necessary boundaries.

The discussion expands to modern irritations in our digital world – from delayed text responses when we know someone is glued to their phone, to people walking across streets while texting, endangering themselves and others. These behaviors trigger our frustration because they represent a perceived devaluation of human connection and safety.

Take a moment to reflect on your own pet peeves as you listen. What might they reveal about your values? Perhaps they're not random sensitivities but meaningful indicators of what matters most to you in your interactions with others. By understanding the psychology behind our irritations, we gain valuable insights into ourselves and the implicit expectations that help society function smoothly.

Listen now and join our community every Friday night at 6 PM Pacific/9 PM Eastern for our live shows. Don't forget to subscribe and share your own pet peeves in the comments!

Thank you for stopping by. Please visit our website: All About The Joy and add, like and share. You can also support us by shopping at our STORE - We'd appreciate that greatly. Also, if you want to find us anywhere on social media, please check out the link in bio page.

Music By Geovane Bruno, Moments, 3481
Editing by Team A-J
Host, Carmen Lezeth


DISCLAIMER: As always, please do your own research and understand that the opinions in this podcast and livestream are meant for entertainment purposes only. States and other areas may have different rules and regulations governing certain aspects discussed in this podcast. Nothing in our podcast or livestream is meant to be medical or legal advice. Please use common sense, and when in doubt, ask a professional for advice, assistance, help and guidance.

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Transcript

Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Carmen Lezeth (00:00):
Hey everyone, welcome to All About the Joy.
This is the private lounge.
We have Cynthia in the house,rick Costa's in the house.
How you guys doing what's up?
So today we're going to talkabout a subject.
I think we touched on thisbefore on one of our lives.
We talked about pet peeves andI really want to talk about it
because I want to think aboutwhat it says about us.

(00:21):
About what it says about us.
So I think it could be both apositive and a negative.
So first I wanted to see whatyou guys thought.
Maybe the definition of petpeeves are for you.

Cynthia (00:35):
I guess something that just annoys you, that you know
kind of is like a tick orsomething that just triggers you
type of thing.
I've got plenty of those.

Carmen Lezeth (00:46):
Right, yeah, it's something that a particular
person finds especiallyannoying or frustrating.
It might be something big orsmall, but it's not like
something general that everyone,that it bothers everyone.
I mean, rick, would you kind ofagree with that?
Yeah?

Rick Costa (01:03):
To me.
I would say it's something thatis annoying to you, but the
root of it is in considerationon the other person's part.

Carmen Lezeth (01:12):
Oh, you made that all like that.
Yeah, it's the other person'sfault, right?
I think one of my big we'vetalked about this.
I cannot stand people who don'tuse directionals.
I can't stand it.
Think one of my big we'vetalked about this.
I cannot stand people who don'tuse directionals.
I can't stand it.
Uh, when you're driving in someplaces they're called blinkers

(01:33):
right blinkers in in connecticut.
What do you guys call them?

Rick Costa (01:38):
turn signal, I think turn signals right.

Carmen Lezeth (01:41):
So I have gotten so frustrated and I just want
to apologize in case this personis ever watching this show.
I don't know who you are, butyou were driving a Lambo.
Is that what they're called theLamborghinis?
Is that what a Lambo, 21 yearsold, that's in mint condition.

(02:02):
And I went to the stop sign andthey were like here and I, and
that's a red light, the redlight.
And I went and I rolled down mywindow, cause I had that window
open and I was like, does yourcar not come with a direction?
They couldn't hear me, but Iwas like, and they didn't hear,
they could care less, like, andI realized like that's bad, like

(02:28):
that's road rage, but I was soannoyed.
Is that what the Lamborghinisare called?
Lambos?

Rick Costa (02:35):
Yeah.

Carmen Lezeth (02:36):
Oh, they are Okay.
But I said it with attitude andangry, but they didn't hear me.
But they also probably heard meand just ignored me, because
why would you respond to me?
Do you know what I mean?
But I felt they knew that whatthey did was wrong.
I'm just going to say yeah.

Cynthia (02:55):
Oh yeah, oh yeah.
I'm the same way Today.
Actually, as I'm driving home,I'm thinking about like the pet
peeves and I said, oh yeah, thisis one of them, people not
using their blinkers, cutting infront of me, and of course they
can't hear me in my car and I'mcussing them out.
And, juan's, like you think youhave road rage?

Carmen Lezeth (03:14):
Oh, my God, oh, he's in the car with you.
Yeah, whenever I'm driving he'sin the car.
You know what's so ghetto aboutme?
If somebody's in the car withme, especially one of my god
daughters or something I'm socomposed like, all the rage is
inside.
I'm totally that person like inthe car, I'm totally happy and

(03:35):
joyful, but inside, dying, Iwould never wow.

Rick Costa (03:40):
Okay, you have the same road rage thing I do oh
yeah, I think my son may havesaid something to the same
effect once or twice in the pastbefore.
Like Dad, you're really angry.
I'm like because it's stupid.

Carmen Lezeth (03:53):
You know what would be great though I know
this sounds weird I've alwayswanted to have a little sign
Like is your blinker broken?
No, you're so bad, no, but justa sign that you could just put
up or whatever.
Or you could press a button andit could come out of your car
and be like a flag or somethingand say is your blinker broken,

(04:15):
or something.
I just don't understand why.
Well, okay, so this is what Ithink it says about me.
Clearly I have issues with roadrage, I think no, but I.
I think it says about me.
Um, clearly I have issues withroad rage, I think no, but I.
I do think it's aboutconsideration.
That was one of the things Iwrote was I don't like people
who aren't, because people whoare doing that are not thinking
about the people behind them,right?

(04:36):
They're not being consideratethat other people don't know
where they're going.
And when we don't know whereyou're going, we're assuming
you're going to go straight andso we're going to behave that
way.
And then somebody else would belike well, you're supposed to
be one car behind.
I am, I am.
That's not the point, you know.

Cynthia (04:55):
And this week all the school, college schools are
moving in, so of course you havepeople from other states and
it's like dude, if you're goingto move into this state, use
your blinkers.
Know the rules of Boston.

Carmen Lezeth (05:12):
You know what I mean.
Boston is crazy.
Drive is like LA.
True but true, but still useyour blinker right, exactly.

Rick Costa (05:22):
You know, what always makes me madder is not
that they didn't use theirblinker at all.
It's when they slow down.
They're already starting toturn, and then they turn on
their blinks.

Cynthia (05:38):
They already knew.

Rick Costa (05:40):
That pissed me off even more.

Carmen Lezeth (05:43):
They're already in the turn, they're already
almost there, and then they puton the blinker.
That one's a good one.
It's hilarious, yeah.
What other pet peeves do youguys have?

Cynthia (05:55):
Oh, I hate the sound of people chewing.
Do you really?
It's really?
Oh my God.

Carmen Lezeth (06:03):
Wait, so that's not an ASMRmr thing you want to
listen to wow, I didn't knowthat.
It really bothers me, yeah sowhat do you think it says about
you?
I know people who haven't seenour episode where we did asmr
for like the whole hour, all allthree of us.
It was so random, it was one ofour Friday night lives.

(06:27):
It was very funny actually,right, yeah, what do you think
it says about you?
That I have anger issues?
No, no, it probably means that,like you don't like kind of
ambient noises like that.

Cynthia (06:44):
Yeah, there's certain noises that really bother me,
like very, very high-pitchednoises bother me, like alarms,
like a fire alarm.
That really bugs me.
Okay, that's supposed to bugyou.
Well, yeah, I know, I know itis, but there's certain ones
that are just really, reallyhigh pitch and it really hurts
my ears, but chewing sounds.

Carmen Lezeth (07:06):
Sounds is interesting, because how do you
get around that when you're atdinner with somebody?

Cynthia (07:10):
Yeah, you just kind of your face yeah Hard.

Carmen Lezeth (07:18):
Is it anybody chewing, or certain like people
who, like you know, do thechewing thing very loudly, very
loudly, or is it just chewing?

Rick Costa (07:29):
Very loudly yeah.

Cynthia (07:32):
There's another person that, like they chew with their
mouth closed, but it's almostlike you can hear the teeth
hitting each other and it's likewhy are you chewing like that?
Wow.

Carmen Lezeth (07:44):
Is the food that hard?
Wow, I've never.
I mean, I know there are peoplewho don't like that, but okay.
But Rick, what were you goingto say?

Rick Costa (07:52):
I think this is more like an old movie thing, but
there used to be like characterswould be like chewing gum Hang,
hang a gun, don't want you todie.

Carmen Lezeth (08:01):
Look at Cynthia's dying dying.

Cynthia (08:03):
That's annoying.

Carmen Lezeth (08:05):
You know, there's so much ASMR videos and
stuff on YouTube and TikTokwhere that's all they're doing.
They're like licking their lips, really.

Cynthia (08:16):
She just keeps swiping.
I know someone else who eatsfruit and they're always like
and I went.

Carmen Lezeth (08:25):
I wonder, what that means.
Right like I wonder, because Idon't know, it's just okay, but
wait, I have something similar,rick, we're gonna get you in a
second, that's what?
But just because we're the samething, I don't like when people
are typing too loud or theirphones like, and to me it's like
.
I don't like noise pollution.
I don't know if that's a thing,but I don't like.

(08:46):
I like it quiet.
So I wonder if there'ssomething similar there.

Rick Costa (08:49):
But I don't like clickety clackety keyboards,
like when my boss gave me thelast computer I was like, oh no,
got rid of it.

Cynthia (09:01):
I hate that, it's just annoying what about the when
they have the long nails andthey're typing no?
I hate that, it's just annoying.
What about the typewriters?

Carmen Lezeth (09:07):
When they have the long nails and they're
typing.
Oh, I don't get the long nailsthing and typing and I don't
know who said wiping their ass.
One time I was like it's toomuch information.
But now, whenever I seesomebody with long nails it
doesn't matter who it is,celebrity, anything I'm like
it's the.
It's the only thing that comesto my head, like that must hurt.

(09:31):
Or you're not wiping fully, ormaybe you have a bidet.
I don't know.
You must have a bidet Becauseyou can't.
You know, like Cynthia Erivovo,who we all love, her nails are
longer than she is tall.
I mean, she's like a littlething and her nails are like
clam, clam, clam.

(09:52):
You know, um, but yeah, oh.

Rick Costa (09:55):
So you don't like an old school typewriter, though,
rick that's like a vintage thing, yeah, like that's almost on
purpose.
So that was almost.
That would just take me back.
I wouldn't be annoyed, unless Ihad it here every day.
Then I'd be like, okay, it'sgiving me a headache, where's my
aspirin?

Carmen Lezeth (10:13):
Okay, what other pet peeve do you have?

Rick Costa (10:16):
People that can't clean a bus to themselves.
I can like their normal houseand their mother works there.
You expect me to clean yourmess?

Carmen Lezeth (10:24):
No, but you don't just tell them, I tell
them.

Rick Costa (10:30):
I guess it depends on my relationship with them.

Carmen Lezeth (10:33):
Let me be very clear.
If you are ever invited to myhome, you will pick up after
your damn self, because I am notyour maid.
I'll tell you to your face Idon't care, that's where I'm
mean, or whatever.
Do you know what I mean?
What do you think it says aboutyou?

Cynthia (10:52):
He's a neat freak.

Carmen Lezeth (10:55):
I don't know.
I don't know if you're.

Rick Costa (10:56):
Are you a?

Carmen Lezeth (10:57):
neat freak.

Rick Costa (10:59):
I wouldn't say that.

Carmen Lezeth (11:00):
No, I think it's what you said earlier.
I think all these things comedown to maybe some type of being
considerate, you know.
So the thing that I wasresearching a little bit I
didn't do a lot of research onit, but it's micro truths that
come out right.
There are things that we learnabout ourselves, and here's the
thing Do you ever do the samepet peeve that annoys you?

(11:22):
Do you actually do it as well,is the next question or do you
have any things that you do thatother people might consider a
pet peeve?
So I use my directional all thetime.
I'm just going to say straightup all the time, whatever.
However, I do sometimes, likeall humans, make mistakes when

(11:46):
I'm driving.
So I love that.
Most people think they're likeeveryone thinks they're the best
driver on the planet, and I'mthe complete opposite.
Like I am going to drive theactual speed limit.
I am not good.
Like I might go five above orfive under or whatever, but I'm
not going to go 85 just becausethat's how the traffic's going,

(12:08):
and I know that annoys people,but I don't love to drive.
I'm a careful driver.
The speed limit says 75, usedto be 65.
Now you're all going 85, 90.
I don't understand, so I know Ican see.

Cynthia (12:22):
Something is like uh-huh I know, but you keep the
one behind you, like oh.

Carmen Lezeth (12:28):
They're going at me right, because I'm never
going to be in that left laneover to the, you know, the one
that Terry K always talks about.
Don't be in this.
The what's the, that's the lanehe's in the travel lane.
No, no, but he calls it theticket money lane because you
got ticket money.
What?
No, no, but he calls it theticket money lane because you
got ticket money.
What was great about him whenhe did that?
He's the.
He's an influencer on TikTokPolice officers.

(12:51):
This was before ICE, everyonebefore ICE.
But the police officers cameout and you know and did, they
did stitches with him on TikTokand they were laughing.

Terry Kaye (Influencer) (13:09):
I thought this was common
knowledge, but obviously not.
So let me teach some of y'all.
The left lane, also known asthe fast lane, it's for people
who have ticket money.
It's for people who have ticketmoney.
If you are going to follow therules, follow the laws as you
should.
That middle lane is reservedjust for you.
It's yours.
If you are scared, if you'regoing to tiptoe, if you are
hesitant, that far right lane isjust for you.

(13:29):
Nobody else wants to be overthere.
That is your area.
But by golly gee, do not getover in that far left lane, also
known as the fast lane, tiptoe,because we're trying to him.
We have ticket money and evenif we don't have ticket money,
look, that's our burden to bear.
Don't get over here holding usup because you scared.

(13:52):
Now, middle lane if you'regoing to follow the rules.
Far right lane.
If you're scared, left lane,look your back.

Carmen Lezeth (14:01):
They're like yeah, don't be in the ticket
because we're going to get you.
So if you don't have ticketmoney, don't be in the because
we're gonna get you.
So if you don't have ticketmoney, don't be in that fast
lane.
So I I use my directional allthe time, but I do go the speed
limit.

Rick Costa (14:14):
Fight me and I actually stop at stop signs.
Fight me, yeah, I do incalifornia.

Carmen Lezeth (14:21):
That's against the law.
It has to be a rolling stopsign.
I'm kidding, Nobody stops it.
I mean we stop it Like, we kindof stop, Like we stop, but
we're still rolling.
You don't pause.
It's a rolling stop sign.
It's just.
You know, everyone kind of doesit.
It's kind of the lie air, butyou guys stop at your stop signs

(14:43):
.
Oh my God, this is so boringbut kind of funny conversation.

Rick Costa (14:57):
One thing I will say , though, about the blinkers is
maybe the only time I won't do.

Carmen Lezeth (14:59):
It is if you are in a lane and there's only you
can only turn one certain way.
I think you should use it allthe time, because I think that's
where you make the mistake.
If I'm coming out of theparking lot and there's only one
way to go, it's habit.
I'm not even thinking about itand I think the problem is
people pick and choose when touse it.
But if you just use it all thetime, you're never going to not
use it.

Cynthia (15:14):
But I think that's come naturally to you at that point.

Carmen Lezeth (15:21):
I'm sure the person in the Lamborghini was
like ah, it's just a Honda,she's going to make sure she
knows where she is around me.
No big deal, I won't use it.
I think if you start makingexcuses about it, that's what we
get in trouble.
Any other pet peeves?

Cynthia (15:35):
My old coworker, the one that got laid off.
She used to burp like a truckdriver.
That's just bad manners.
It's like, okay, everybodyburped.
You know what I mean.
But there's also a littlediscreet way to do it.
Sometimes you might let out aburping.
Maybe she has a problem.
She had a problem, all right, Ibet you she watches our show.

(16:00):
Just kidding, but she used todo it constantly and so loud and
it was just like at some pointit was just like okay, you know,
you're doing it, you know.

Carmen Lezeth (16:14):
I just think people don't have manners and
etiquette.
I think that's what it is rightLike, or people get too
comfortable.

Cynthia (16:23):
Yeah, yeah, I made the one thing.
You can do it around you know,family, friends, whatever you
know but it's like you're doingit at work, I know, but I think
she probably has a problem.

Carmen Lezeth (16:35):
I'm not defending her.
I'm like that's kind ofembarrassing, that's like
farting or whatever, likepretending you're not.
You know what I mean.
Like you know, I don't know ifyou ate something bad.
Okay, this is going down areally bad way, I don't know
whatever okay, rick, share withus your bodily issues.

Rick Costa (16:59):
I'm just kidding well, I was gonna say I know
some people they do have aproblem and they almost can't
help it.

Carmen Lezeth (17:06):
But if you always stink, I don't think
people know they have a problem?

Rick Costa (17:13):
no, you generally don't.

Carmen Lezeth (17:15):
But uh, like, I don't know, like, if you have to
take a shower a few times a day, then do what you gotta do but
people don't know, okay, thereason why I bring this up,
because somebody came to me inone of the offices I worked in,
I'm just gonna say, in the lastfew months, and they said that
one of the other co-workersstinks all the time.
I was like really, I neversmell him.

(17:36):
And they were like no, becauseyou're not around him.
We work with him all the time.
And I'm like I don't think so.
He's given me a hug beforewhatever.
And then I'm like maybe an eyestick, maybe they're trying to
tell me something.

Rick Costa (17:48):
The smells are combating each other.

Carmen Lezeth (17:50):
I was like wait a minute, I was freaking out.
But then I realized, because Imade it a point to like stand
next to him in the kitchen orwhatever, and I was like, oh, I
see what they're saying.
Now I smell what they're sayingnow I was like I don't know how

(18:13):
to tiptoe on that one.
I don't know how to deal withthat one, like I don't know.
And they were coming to me likecan you take care of it?
I'm like let me see my contract.

Rick Costa (18:25):
You had a hygiene tweet.

Cynthia (18:28):
I don't know.
That's part of my jobdescription.

Carmen Lezeth (18:31):
I know I'm here to fix problems, but that's a
weird one.
But, I started thinking aboutit.
I've have conversations, likeI've had conversations with
women and men regarding dressattire.
Like we've had some women inthe couple and I'll say in the
past few years where they'vegone into, like they've come in

(18:54):
to start a job and they'redressed in a way that is
probably not.
It's like it's like walking oneggs.
Basically too much cleavage,too much ass, like just too much
.
You know what I mean.

Rick Costa (19:07):
Like too much tightness.
It's an office, not a club.

Carmen Lezeth (19:11):
Right, and here's the thing you have to be
very careful because you can'tyou know what I mean.
Like, people have the right todress however they want, and but
not in our office.
There is a dress code and wehave it as part of our handbook
that there is a dress code a lotof places.
Don't you know what I mean?
But it's still something.

(19:32):
You have to be careful becauseeverybody has their own style,
and I have to say, like onewoman that we had a conversation
with and I say we because I hadsomebody else in the room with
me right, there's a way you doit.
You don't do it by yourself orwhatever, you know.
Um, she fabulous, if she wasgoing to a club, you know what I
mean like she was going out,you know like, she just like,

(19:54):
but there was no need.
You know, now I can't tell hernot to wear.
She was wearing like stilettosevery day to work, like just,
but you, I can't, you do you.
That's fine, whatever, but thecleavage down to here.
You know what I mean.
And so it was so difficult tohave the conversation, but then
she was like no, I get it, I getit, I'll do it.

(20:17):
She was totally cool about it,because she wanted a job so
badly.
You know what I mean.
She had already gotten a joband she wanted to keep it.
And I said here's the thing.
You should be able to wearwhatever you want.
Whatever you want to wearshould be the way it is,
unfortunately, because we livein a country full of crazy
people.
So I turned around I said weneed to be more aware of how we

(20:42):
dress so that we don't have todeal with the crazy people.
You know what I mean and I'm sogood at my job like, because
it's true and but she was alsovery receptive, like I was lucky
one of the men that came in.
He was just wearing half shirtsand he was like it's like, but I
just came from the gym.
Well, we don't, I get it.
But I was like no, you have towear.
She's like no, but I have.
I said not a.
Well, we don't, I get it.
But I was like no, you have towear shades, like no, but I have
.
I said not a half shirt.

(21:02):
No, I don't need to see yourbelly, like we need to, you need
to clean up or something Likejust, you have to have
consideration.
Going back to that word, peoplein the office, you know, if you
don't have time to take ashower and get dressed or
whatever, then you need tochange the time you go work out
because you need to be here atwork.
Is your gym paying your bill orare we paying your bills?

(21:25):
I'm just trying to figure itout, because he had a little bit
of an attitude and I was readyto be like that's all right,
it's warning number one andwe're going to fire your ass
because you're not that greatanyways, motherfucker, that was
all deep down inside.

Cynthia (21:40):
I.
That was all deep down inside.
I hope you're not watching theshow.
Speaking on how to dress atwork, I remember people coming
in for an interview and wearingflip-flops and I'm like really,
but what's your job?

Carmen Lezeth (21:54):
Where are they working in At a?

Cynthia (21:56):
hospital.
Well, you can't wear open-toedshoes at all, right?
You know what I mean.
You're dealing with patients,you're dealing with medicines or
whatever Like they're sharpobjects, and you're wearing
flip-flops to an injury.

Carmen Lezeth (22:10):
Can you say my feet smell?
No, I'm just kidding, yeah,yeah, I mean, oh God, those are
just bad fashion Cause they'reugly.
Okay, um, no, but it's in thehandbook.
Like, I think the mistakepeople make is that people
usually just take any and I'mnot a hospital wouldn't do this

(22:32):
but they'll.
You know, people start abusiness and they'll just pull
any random handbook off theinternet to start their business
or whatever, and they won'treally read it and they won't
really talk to a lawyer about itand you act.
I mean, if you're having anat-home, remote job or it's
different, but if you have an inoffice and you're hiring people
, you need to make sure youcover all the bases.
You know, now, I can't tellsomeone you're dressing too sexy

(22:55):
, see, I can't say that becausethat's not, that's not objective
and you know people may thinkme wearing a gap t-shirt is sexy
.
I don't know.
Ooh, carmen, that wrinkledneckline.
That's why you can't saysomething like that.
You have to be very objectiveabout it, you know.

(23:20):
But if you have it in thehandbook and if you can put it
towards the idea that, like we,we need to be able to be
considerate of everyone in theoffice, you know, and this needs
to be a place like as much as Ilove your outfit for the club
where everyone be like hey,who's that here?
We need to be like hey.
We need to just work togetherand not be worried about the
flashiness of it all.
She still kept wearing herheels though.

(23:43):
Hey, go ahead.
Is there a day when you won'tbe able to still knock that shit
out?
I know because I used to wearthem all the time.
I never wore heels like that,though Three or four inches was
enough for me.

Rick Costa (23:59):
This is actually an issue that comes up not to be
religious, but in church too.
It's like girl if you bend overa little bit, something might
pop out.
What are you doing?
You're in church, really.

Carmen Lezeth (24:10):
You're loving the Lord.
What are you doing?
Do you tell people in churchthey can't wear something?

Rick Costa (24:17):
If it's like a woman , they'll have a woman like an
older woman say something.
Or if it's a man, I don't wantto be the man really.

Carmen Lezeth (24:24):
So it usually would be like a young person
wearing something out of lineprobably right.

Terry Kaye (Influencer) (24:28):
That's funny.

Carmen Lezeth (24:30):
It's always the young kids who don't understand.
Yeah, so I never did go andtalk to that person about them
smelling, but I did have.
Well, first of all, I didn'tknow he smelled, so I don't work
with him.
So I don't care, not mydepartment, but um, but I did

(24:50):
talk to the group of men whoworked with him and said you
know what, maybe you could do itone of two ways.
The first way is to talk aboutyour own showering habits.
I don't mean like so, guys,what do you do when you shower?
I don't mean like that, just belike God.
I missed my shower this morning.

(25:11):
Do I smell?
I shower every morning withoutfail.
You know what I mean.
You do it like that.

Rick Costa (25:18):
I just got a new body wash that smells so, so
good.
Have you ever tried this bodywash?

Carmen Lezeth (25:22):
exactly, yeah, that's how you do it, so that's
how I told them all to go aboutit to be make it more about what
we all, because some peoplejust don't know.

Rick Costa (25:31):
Yeah, you know, I at first one.
Make sure it wasn't me itwasn't me.

Carmen Lezeth (25:37):
Okay, you know it's him everybody.
You know it's him.

Rick Costa (25:39):
Go ahead I had a friend, that very large person,
say that way and, yes, they didkind of have this issue and so
somebody thought I'm gonna givehim a big hint and be anonymous
about it and they gift wrappedand when he opened that up he
was heated that's not nice I waslike that's what I'm saying.

(26:02):
It wasn't me.
He was heated.

Carmen Lezeth (26:04):
I was like, oh, that's that's mean but also, I
mean, first of all, it was a badway to do it, but secondly,
they probably still got thepoint.
And I think when you're biggerand look, it's not even bigger.
I have, as I've gotten older,some areas that flap over that
never flapped over before mypoor boobs.

(26:28):
So you know you sweat a littlebit, you gotta wipe a little bit
and you know you gotta do somedamage.
But that's how I would approachthat, right, I would go up to
that person and and make itabout I.
But that's how I would approachthat, right, I would go up to
that person and make it about Ithink that's the thing is that
the best way to help otherpeople, especially when it's an
embarrassing thing, is to makeit about you.

(26:51):
But that requires empathy and welack that in this country.
I don't know if it's just thiscountry, but this society.
We are so divorced of havingempathy and sympathy that we
don't seem to be able to do it.
We just get mad at other peoplein a Lamborghini.
We don't think that maybe theywere just having a bad day and

(27:12):
they forgot, and maybe it's notreally their Lamborghini.
You know what dawned on me too.
I was like because I work withso many people that own a lot of
these stupid cars and I waslike they don't drive them.
Their maintenance people willdrive them or bring them.
Or I'm like what if it wasn't?

Cynthia (27:30):
You know what I?

Carmen Lezeth (27:33):
mean.
And then I'm like you know what?
Now I feel better about it.
It's okay, go ahead, enjoy yourfun drive.
I don't know, but just beingmore empathetic and sympathetic
about things I think would makeit easier.

Rick Costa (27:48):
One that's for me.
If you use the last bit oftoilet paper and you don't put
the new roll in, it's going tobe me and you.
It's right there, You're notgoing to know it was me.

Carmen Lezeth (28:02):
You're not going to know it was me.

Rick Costa (28:05):
I hate that.

Carmen Lezeth (28:07):
Okay, but do you do the toilet paper up or down?

Rick Costa (28:10):
I had a feeling you were going to say that.

Carmen Lezeth (28:13):
Because there's only one right way to do it.

Rick Costa (28:15):
There was a whole episode about that.

Carmen Lezeth (28:17):
It's over.

Rick Costa (28:18):
Yeah, I do over.

Carmen Lezeth (28:21):
Why do didn't do it?
There was a whole show aboutthat it's over.

Cynthia (28:23):
Yeah, I do over.

Carmen Lezeth (28:24):
Why do people do it under?
That don't even make no sense.
It doesn't whatever okay, veryweird.

Cynthia (28:27):
All right, another pet peeve of mine.
Hey, um, cars that have soundsystems that are just way too
loud.
People are sitting in the car.
You cannot even hear the song.
All you hear or feel actuallyis boom, boom, boom.
You can't even enjoy the song Idon't get that Okay.

Carmen Lezeth (28:50):
So I'm going to say something.
Okay, I agree with you.
I agree with you.
However, I have my old HondaCivic Hybrid and I don't have a
new stereo system in it at all,whatever.
But I remember when I lived on21st Street.
I think you came to myapartment when I lived on 21st
Street I would always I had myown garage.
That was the kind of cool partof that apartment complexes,

(29:12):
it's like that was like a wholeother.
You can have a whole otherapartment in there.
I didn't realize that when Ipulled in and I had my music
blaring or whatever, because Ifelt like I have my windows up,
no one can hear it Like.
My neighbors came down one day.
They were like Carmen, we loveyou, we think you're a great

(29:33):
person.
I was like what happened?
What?
Like I thought they were goingto give me a gift or something.
I'm like.
They're like, can you pleasestop listening to your music so
loud in your car and then driveinto the?
I'm like.
I had no idea.
They're like I said, but thewindows are up.
They're like carmen, it's likeyou're in our living room.
We can hear it.
It's like a.
Then the husband was like youbought a new, like a new

(29:57):
surround system or something foryour car, right?
But all they hear is the boom,boom, boom, like, oh my god, old
school, I shouldn't say thatbecause people will try to steal
it, but it is pretty loud so Idon't do that anymore.
I don't have it loud anymore,but I didn't know, wow.

Cynthia (30:16):
Yeah, but see, you didn't know.
These other people know They'vegot all the windows down and
they're doing it on purpose.
Oh yeah, no yeah.
Like I was on the bus the otherday and you could feel it
through the bus, I was like,yeah, that's just way too much.

Carmen Lezeth (30:33):
Unless it's a good song that I agree with and
I'm okay with it.

Rick Costa (30:37):
That's my problem.
If this is like, this is my jam.
If I can't hear myself singing,it's not loud enough.

Carmen Lezeth (30:47):
I walked across the street the other day and
somebody had their music up.
What were they playing?
I can't remember.
Oh, did a little boo thing.
I walked across like dancing.
I was such a dork.
I'm sure other people didn'tappreciate it, but I was like
that's a good sound Cause I gota bounce to it, you know.

Cynthia (31:09):
Yeah.

Carmen Lezeth (31:12):
I agree with you and people do.
Yeah, it's too much, especiallywhen people have it, you know.
They clearly have bought a newstereo system so that everyone
can hear the music they listento.
And how come it's never someonewho listens to like classical
or orchestra, you know what Imean.
It's always like hard rock orrap or heavy metal.
It's always something I don'twant to listen to.

(31:33):
So true, I'm sorry that's sotrue.

Rick Costa (31:47):
I'm sorry.
What about people that takeforever to respond back to a
text or email, when you knowthey are always on their phone?
They're ghosting you with them.
They're always on the phone.

Terry Kaye (Influencer) (31:53):
I didn't see it bro, you was, I'm
with you.
You were always on your phone,which means you didn't see it
right?

Carmen Lezeth (32:02):
yeah, but people have different.
I mean, I don't know, Ishouldn't say what people do,
but I have different chimes anddifferent rings for everybody,
so if I hear a certain one, Ican wait.
I guess that's not nice.

Cynthia (32:17):
I know the reason why she doesn't respond.

Carmen Lezeth (32:19):
I respond to everyone's texts at minimum
within 24 hours, but I always.
When have you ever waited forme to respond to your texts?
Oh, never, never, I respond,Rick.
Have you ever texted me and Inot responded?

Rick Costa (32:36):
Always.

Carmen Lezeth (32:37):
Always, I always .
Yeah, I'm, I don't know whypeople, you know people like oh
my God, I get so many emails.
That's why I didn't get back toyou, shut the fuck up.
I've had five or six clients atone time, staff offices of like
20 and 30 in each office peopleemailing me.
You know what?
I still get to my emails whenmy friends email me.
But that's just me, you do, you.

(32:59):
I have a system, though I don'tthink people because I'm
ridiculously organized, but youknow, from like 8am to four
o'clock I do business emails andthen anything after that is
personal.
So I close that off.
I don't have emails mixing in.
You know what I mean.
So for me it's really easy.

(33:20):
So that's why I always get backto my friends or whatever so,
and I only do an hour each, likemorning, and then hour at night
and get back to emails, okay,so you all know my trick now.

Rick Costa (33:29):
So there, it is why I think dios what if you're like
in a doctor's office right,you're surrounded by strangers.
You don't know any of thesepeople.
You're maybe already a littlebit agitated and you hear what's
that?
Exactly somebody doing that.
It's like, oh my god, please,for the love of god, stop.

(33:49):
But it's a stranger.
So it's like what do you do?

Carmen Lezeth (33:51):
okay, wait, that really bothers you the sighing
who does that?
do I do, that do I do that I dothat sometimes yeah, rick does
the sighing and I was like, andthen I'm like is that what jesus

(34:14):
would do?
Is that what jesus would do?
That's what that's always myrebuttal.
Is that how Jesus would react?
I don't know if tapping bothersme.
I mean, I guess it depends onwhere I'm at.
Like I told you, when I'm in anoffice, in an intimate office,
like there's three of us sharinga shoebox and somebody's you
know phone is ringing andthey're texting and you can hear

(34:36):
it click, click, Like I don't Itext without the clicking.
Like I don't I text without theclicking like I don't
understand why you would do that.
It drives me insane.
And then they get upset with mebecause I asked them to turn
off the sound.
Like I hate when you're here,I'm like, okay, well, I'm gonna
still be here, so turn off yourfucking phone, I don't care.
Yeah, I don't care.
Yeah, those are my things Idon't know.

(34:57):
I don't know.
I think if it's a stranger andit's really bothering me, I
might be cute about it.
I tell people.
I know I'm bad, I'm blunt.

Cynthia (35:08):
My thing is early in the morning.
Why do people feel the need tohave a virtual or FaceTime and
talk so loud?

Carmen Lezeth (35:21):
Wait, I don't know what you're talking about.

Cynthia (35:22):
Who's doing that?
People waiting for the shuttleor on the bus or walking
anywhere, and they're talking soloud in their FaceTime.
It's 7am.
Who the hell are you talking to?
Shouldn't they be at work too?

Carmen Lezeth (35:37):
Maybe somebody in another country, I don't know
, I don't know, I don't know, Idon't know, I don't know, I know
, I don't know, I don't walk.
So there are things I don't dothat other people do, that I
still.
I don't even think it's aboutcoordination.
I just think I don't thinkpeople have learned how not to
use their phones all the time.
We always talk about kids.

(35:57):
It's not kids, it's adults whohave the problem.
The problem.
I see people walking across thestreet.
I'll be in my car and they're.
They haven't even looked up,they're stepping off the curb
and they're still texting.
And in my head I'm like I justdon't trust car.
I don't trust other people somuch that I'm gonna be okay with
you, hoping that you're gonnastop your car so that I can walk

(36:20):
gracefully across the street.
Like I don't trust nobody.

Cynthia (36:24):
Like today I'm coming home and this girl is literally
on the bus talking really loudon her phone to a credit card
company about some charges thatwere on her phone, and then
she's saying her credit cardnumber out loud.
Are you an idiot?
These are personal calls.

Carmen Lezeth (36:42):
There are no rules on the see, because when I
used to take the bus and thetrolling stuff, you didn't, we
didn't have phones.
Oh my god, there's no rulesthat you can like in restaurants
.
You can't have your phone on.
You know what I mean.
Like no, there's no rules.
Oh see, but again, it'sconsideration.
Yeah, but you're expectingpeople need rules then right, so

(37:05):
I'm just saying this is one ofthose moments where I would
personally send a letter to themayor and to the mbta or
whatever it's.
What's it called in inmassachusetts?

Cynthia (37:15):
no, it wasn't even the regular t, it was our shuttle
bus, the employee shuttle, oh,that's even worse.

Carmen Lezeth (37:21):
Well, you should talk to.
I thought you meant like publictransportation, no, it was our
employee shuttle.

Cynthia (37:28):
It's like you have a bus full of people and you're
saying your credit card number.

Carmen Lezeth (37:33):
I'll allow you really trust these employees why
don't you, just why don't yousend the?
You know what?
You send them the link to theshow.
This is a problem, seriously.
I mean, I thought you weretalking about the regular tea,
I'm like that.
I think there were rules.
You can't do that.
I don't know.
I haven't been on a on a.

(37:54):
I haven't been in a in a longtime, even in a place where
normally people don't talk loud,in a bus in a long time.

Rick Costa (38:01):
Even in a place where normally people don't talk
loud, and I don't mean alibrary, that's obvious, but
like a grocery store, forexample, Like I don't need to
hear that.

Carmen Lezeth (38:15):
You know what Restaurant people do that, that
I am.
Don't be in the grocery storewith me and be in line and get
mad at the cashier because yourass is on the phone and you
didn't hear her when she said 42, whatever.
And then I have told like Icannot tell you.
I almost wait for it.
I get in line just to wait tosee who the motherfucker is

(38:35):
that's going to do this shit.
I will defend the cash cashier.
That drives me insane.
I tend to use my phone in thegrocery store, not to be on the
phone, but because I use mycoupons with my phone.
But I think, being on the, Idon't.
People try to multitask andpeople there's no such thing as
multitasking.
Everyone thinks they canmultitask, but that's not how

(38:58):
the brain works and what you'redoing is everything half-assed
at the same time.
That's what you're doinginstead of focusing on one thing
.
But I do think one of thethings that we can take away
from this is consideration,empathy, sympathy and just
trying to be more considerate ofother people, because you're
annoying Cynthia with yourchewing.

(39:22):
Hey everyone, thank you forstopping by.
Remember we have our Fridaynight shows at 6 pm Pacific, 9
pm Eastern.
We also have our Thursday nightshows, 6 pm, called Culture and
Consequence.
So check out that show, butbeware, it's heavy on politics.
Anyways, remember, at the endof the day it really is all

(39:43):
about the joy and we'll see younext time.
Bye everyone, bye.
Thanks for stopping by.
All About the Joy.
Be better and stay beautifulfolks.
Have a sweet day.
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