Unpacking Loss, Isolation at the Grocery Store, the Role of Jealousy and A Visit from Charlie Mattera

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Carmen Lezeth (00:00):
Hey everybody, hi everybody, welcome to All About
the Joy.
So glad you're here.
So you know, this week was areally interesting week for me
because Monday was theanniversary of my mother's
passing and I tend to make thata celebration of her life kind
of day, just for myself.
You know what I mean.
And I think on Monday you hadtexted me or something and said
how you doing or whatever.

(00:21):
You know, because we talkedpretty much during the week and
so it was going fine.
I thought I was totally,absolutely fine.
And then on the 29th I haveanother anniversary, which is
Alden's brother, steve.
He passed away like three yearsago of brain cancer.
So it's just still fine,totally fine.

(00:41):
But on Thursday morning notThursday Tuesday morning at nine
o'clock I got an email and theemail was telling me that one of
their friend's mother hadpassed away and you know
whatever, their wife wastraveling to go to this
situation or whatever.
And clearly it was oh and itwas unexpected, that's what it

(01:02):
was.
So I got the email and Itotally lost it.
But you just never know and Idon't know who his friend is or
who.
I don't know who he's talkingabout.
It's not a mutual friend ofours or whatever, but it's so
weird.
The things that will triggeryou.

Rick Costa (01:22):
Yeah, but that's definitely happened before.
I'm like you know, somethinghappened, I should be crying.
Another thing happened, Ishould be crying and then
another thing happened.
I'm like that I shouldn't cry,but it just the dam breaks and
the water starts pouring it.

Just I was like everything's cool.
Here's my thing about a parentpassing that I'll share.
You never get over it.
You know, for me there's neverthe right thing for anyone to
say, and I realized the more Ishared the holiday with people,
the more I'd have to talk aboutit and there was always a downer

(01:57):
.
You know, and it's been so long, you don't ever get over anyone
passing.
I don't think that you love,but you do get used to it.

Rick Costa (02:05):
Yeah, it's been like really slow this week at work
and I don't know if it's becauseit's weird.
Well, it's that, and thenthey're having this really crazy
storm in Florida where mycompany actually is.
I'm in Connecticut but it'slike, and my boss is like, are
you guys okay?
Because he's like I got to gooutside and help to clean up
with the neighbors, are you good?
We're like yeah, it's dead, goahead, do what you gotta do.

So it's weird that it's okay, I'm going to
tell you I was mad at you whenyou sent me that text or
whenever you told me, I forgetwhen you told me about your work
thing.
I'll tell you why.
Okay, so I live in Los Angeles,in Santa Monica, right?
And if there's a fire six hoursfrom me, everyone and their
mother is like Carmen, are youokay?
Everyone's texting me orsending me DMs, are you all

(02:49):
right?
And I'm like, oh, my God, it's,it's in Northern California,
thank you, whatever.
We had the first ever motherflowering hurricane in Los
Angeles here.
I didn't get one text message.
Nobody was worried, nobody.

Rick Costa (03:07):
I did, didn't.

I no, nobody, nobody.
I was shocked by it.
You didn't admit it, you didn'tgrasp the fact, but not when it
was happening.

Rick Costa (03:14):
I thought I did.
I was like checking in,checking in.
I did not.
Are you sure I'm gonna go backand look?
I didn't have to.

I mean, I think you did check in, but it was
just weird, right, Because forme it was.
I'm not saying that peopledidn't check in after the fact.
Here's the thing aboutearthquakes in Los Angeles they
just happened.
They happened, we deal with it,we move on, and thankfully I
haven't been through anything sohorrific.
I've maybe been through ashaker that maybe bounced

(03:43):
something off a shelf for half asecond, but nothing major.
Thank you, Thank you, thank you.
But this anxiety of hurricanesand the news and you have to
shelter in, and everyone in LosAngeles was at the grocery store
buying everything.
I'm like, okay, it's not goingto be all that, I hope, because
I was getting scared.
But you know, we didn't feelanything.

(04:04):
We didn't feel anything.
So, but yeah, so I was.
I was you kind of text me today, and then my other brother
lives in Florida and I was likehope you're all right, whatever,
because he didn't reach out tome.
I was like, well he, I knew hewasn't really near it or
whatever, but it was just sofunny.
I was like he didn't reach outto me either about no hurricane.

Rick Costa (04:25):
I'm telling you I've got to look, I thought I did, I
thought I did and I don't wantto be annoying about it too I
was like, let me just do likeonce a day, check in.

I think you checked in after the fact.

Rick Costa (04:35):
I thought I did during because you were telling
you were giving me updates.

I don't think so I think you're talking about.
I will have to figure it out,and if I have to apologize to
you, I will.

Rick Costa (04:43):
But I was, I was a little sad.

Nobody reached out to all of us here.
I mean, I reached out to likeAndrea.
Andrea lives here and you knowmy friends and everything.
We were all touching base witheach other, you know, because it
was such an anomaly, but butyeah, I don't know, so I sent
you that article about the LA inthe LA Times.

Rick Costa (05:02):
Oh yeah, that was.
I love old people.
That touched me.
I love old people.
That wasn't the point of thearticle, but it it touched me.
Though, when you know the wholething the husband died, and
then you know it just touched meso.

so there's an article in the LA Times and I
would show it, but I am so overtrying to figure out how to do
it.
Should I try?

Rick Costa (05:21):
it one more time.
I mean, are they going to evenbe able to read?

It's probably going to be too small, right,
but let me look at what the whatthe name of it is, because that
would be helpful for everyone.
It's called that personal touchat check stand.
Priceless is the name of it andbasically what they're talking
about in the article is they'veinstalled in a lot of the
grocery stores I'm sure everyonehas experienced this the, what

(05:46):
do they call the self?

Rick Costa (05:48):
checkout.

The self checkout .
So the whole article is talkingabout how that has added to the
isolation of all of us, becauseyou don't have that contact with
the person and saying thatsimple hello, whatever.
And then they put all theselittle I mean they started off
with a, with an elderly womanwho just lost her husband, and

(06:10):
they always go to every Fridayand they go shopping or whatever
, and they always go to the samecashier and they bypass the
checkout and they have likethree or four of those examples.
And so I was saying to you thatI thought it was a fascinating
article because of how we lovetechnology, but this feeling of

(06:33):
isolation and being by yourselfand just bringing it back to
what happened on Monday with meand thinking about my mom, and
then getting that email.
There was even that part of itwhere I wasn't even sharing that
sadness with anyone, like Iwasn't going to bother people
about it because that's what itfeels like.
You don't want to bother people, you know.
But you read the article.
What did you think I mean,besides the fact that you love

(06:54):
old people?
It's so funny.

Rick Costa (06:56):
And just, you know stories always get to people.
You know good stories alwaysgrasp people's attention.
But I think a good question,before we even go further to ask
everybody, including us, let'ssay you're in let's say you're
in Walmart or supermarket,whatever, and there you are, you
have self checkout or you havea person.
Where do you go to?

(07:16):
And I'm not gonna lie, I go tothe person If there if you go to
the person.
I do I do.
I go to the person.
I rather deal with a person andthen if something's wrong
they're right there.
They can deal with immediatelywhether they're like.
I need help over here, but youknow what?

I don't know if it's where I live, but the self
checkout is not only faster, butthere's always a person there,
always a person.

Rick Costa (07:39):
There is.
There is hey, Chris, Chris inthe book.

Hey, chris, wait, is that his name, chris?

Rick Costa (07:45):
Chris, yeah.

Hi Chris, in the Netherlands there is a
designated slow checkout forquote unquote people.
I mean, I'm saying I know theperson at our self checkout
thing because he's always thereand I, yeah, I don't go into the
.
Yeah, I don't know.
Okay, melannie goes to theperson too.

Rick Costa (08:07):
And I decided never use self checkout.
Like if it's like, if the linesare ridiculous and self
checkout looks a little better,then I will go to self checkout.

But oh, my God.

Rick Costa (08:15):
I'm the opposite.

If there's too many people at self checkout,
I'll go wait in line because itgoes quicker, like everyone goes
to self checkout where we are.

Rick Costa (08:23):
Interesting here.
I think it's kind of like halfand half, to be honest.

Yeah, that's an interesting thing.
I I didn't wow.
Melannie also goes to theperson.
Do you go to the same cashierLike?
Do you have a favorite like?
In the article.
No no, okay, that doesn't fazeyou at all.
Okay, Do you do the chit chat?
Hey, kimberly, I don't do selfcheckout too many.
What's a bit to Mars?

Rick Costa (08:47):
Might be a misspun.
I almost forgot to pay forwater.

Many I almost forgot to pay for water at
bottom of the car.
I banned myself from selfcheckout.

Rick Costa (08:55):
I've, I've almost done that too to be asked with
you, because you forget it's onthe bottom, you know.

So do you guys still have to?
You have to pick up everythingin scan.
Is that what you do?

Rick Costa (09:05):
Sometimes I'd be like oh, no, no, no, I can do it
, and they have like a portablething and they'll just come
around and do it.

So in my neighborhood the checkout, self
checkout, is actually a.
It's like there's a cashier butthere isn't.
And you put it on and it scansthrough and it rolls.
It's not just the scan, so likeif you have a lot of stuff or
you have like more than two orthree items, you put it on the
belt and it and it goes down andthen you can bag it at the end.

(09:32):
So it's like a regular cashier,there's just nobody there and
it's just scans.

Rick Costa (09:37):
I've not seen that in Connecticut.

And then you have the thing like if you, because
I always buy like bottled wateror bottled sparkling water and
I'm not going to pick that upand so I always.
Then I scan that on the bottom,whatever.
But yeah, they're, yeah, theyhave it.
So it's like it.
I feel bad because I knowpeople, you know.
Again it gets to that thinglike how many jobs are people
losing, you know, but then yourealize that I'm probably

(10:01):
learning something else or youknow it's never going to be
nobody there.
I mean I guess that's the idea.

Rick Costa (10:07):
That's interesting, I've never even seen that.
So self checkout, and it's gota conveyor belt and you just put
it in the belt yes, and aconveyor belt yeah.
Yeah, we don't have that here.
That might be.
That might be, you know,something I might want to prefer
to do.

So there's always people at the end.
There's always I'm not going tocall them cashiers, but I'm
sure that's what they used to bebut there's always people at
the end and they're like youknow, do you need any bags?
You want to see bags for you?
Blah, blah, blah.
Whatever they're like, do youneed it?
And they'll come in and fixstuff.
And I'm always like oh, look atthe lottery, it looks like it's
a billion dollars.
Let me play.
Can you change this for me?

(10:41):
That's the only reason why I'mgoing to go up and really bother
them, because you can't.
You can't get change from thescanner thing or whatever.

Rick Costa (10:48):
Wow, yeah, I'm literally trying to think, and I
don't think I've ever seen aconveyor about self checkout
here.

You're probably going to get it soon.
Yeah, because.

Rick Costa (10:55):
I think a lot of people.

I think it is faster.
But I was sad when I read thearticle and was like, oh yeah, I
guess if you're not somebodywho is constantly engaging
people, you know like I'll talkto everybody.
I know everybody at the deli.
I know everybody at the bakeryarea.

(11:17):
I know people where I get mycookies.
Notice hiding saying anythingabout fruits and vegetables.
I'm not you know, but I'mserious, but I don't know those
people, so I always say hi orwhatever.
You know, and some people arenot like, they're not friendly
in this.

Rick Costa (11:33):
Yeah.

Yeah.
That's true People neighborly,not neighborly people, that's
true, I usually say hi.

Rick Costa (11:39):
I say hi to the person how are you doing?
Sometimes it's like how's yourday, you know.
But I won't get into likereally deep conversation, but
I'll be a little friendly.

And then you know your people at your store.
See, this is what I don'tunderstand.

Rick Costa (11:53):
I mean I don't.
Well, now I don't go anywherebecause of my situation, but
when I did go I would at leastsay hello, how's your day?
Why do?

you get close to reason, you must go to grocery
store.

Rick Costa (12:02):
Delivery I have everything.
Everything is delivered,everything is delivered.

Okay, that adds to the isolation big time.
Yes, yes.

Rick Costa (12:11):
But I do know, not know, but I recognize the people
that deliver.
Now there's one guy that Isecretly call him Jesus, because
he looks like Jesus with hislong curly hair.
I'm like my Jesus is here.
She's like what he's a white.

Jesus, though You're talking about white Jesus
.

Rick Costa (12:24):
He's a white Jesus, but he looks.
It's that curly long hair, Okay.

That's funny.

Rick Costa (12:30):
Yeah, but yeah, that's the only people I see.

So then I mean, it goes to this thing about how,
like the internet, see, I thinkit's a great tool because it
allows people whether it's inyour situation or not, people
who are recluse is that what yousay Recluse?
They don't like to go outsideor they're not social beings or
whatever.
They have the ability to makefriendships and make

(12:56):
relationships, and I thinkthat's why technology is amazing
.
Like, that's why I do embraceit and love it, you know,
because I think it has thepotential to make society so
much better and, hope it, tomore people.
But again, in that same article, they talk about how technology
has added to the isolation ofpeople, right?

(13:21):
So I was a little confused bythat.
How do you-.

Rick Costa (13:25):
Yeah, because I know , because, like, for example, my
first job was McDonald's andthere was like all these same
people and they were elderlypeople and they came in every
morning.
I knew all their orders andexactly what they wanted and how
much sugar they wanted, theircoffee cream, whatever, like I
knew them all because they cameall the time, or some people
were only on Saturdays orwhatever, and they didn't come

(13:47):
so much because, oh, I love thefood at McDonald's.
It's amazing.
No, I think they came becausethey wanted to have an
experience outside of home andbe with other people.
Right, they would congregatetogether and they knew each
other.
And I'm like you know, yeah,after a while, if you're alone,
you start to go a little starcrazy.
So, yeah, I understand that.

So do you go stir crazy?

Rick Costa (14:08):
Well, no, because I have y'all.

Because I have y'all.
Okay, kimberly just say yeah,rick, I've been doing the
delivery too, but I reallyshouldn't.
Stuff is always missing or evenopen.

Rick Costa (14:22):
Oh, I've never had that.

Can't you complain?
Can't you respond to them?
And complain then to the-.

Rick Costa (14:29):
Yeah, I think I've only complained once and they
took care of me.

So, I think, Kimberly, if you ever have any
suspicion of anything, you canrespond back to the app and they
will take it.
They have to because if notthey could lose you.
They could just a lawsuit waitand happen.
If that's what's going on rightthere, I mean not them giving
you ideas.
I'm just saying that's a badthing, I don't.
I mean, I don't get delivery,because it's also, you know.

(14:55):
It's the same reason why Idon't drive to the grocery store
, which is very unheard of herein Los Angeles.
I walk to the grocery store.
The only time I won't walk tothe grocery store is if I have
to, you know, like if I'm buyingbottled water or something you
know like.
I'm not going to hope that,although that's what I'm trying

(15:15):
to see.

Rick Costa (15:16):
How often do you go, like weekly?
Me To grocery store yeah.

Oh, probably twice a week.

Rick Costa (15:22):
Okay.

Yeah, because it's just me and so okay.
So this is funny.
Like people always like youshould go to Costco.
You go save so much more moneyif you go to Costco.
I'm like I don't need 27 rollsof toilet paper, I don't need
them, I have nowhere to put them, I don't need like big.
Like.
Someone did me the favor onceand they were like I'm going to

(15:44):
Costco, you want me to pick upanything?
This is before I understoodwhat Costco was.
They brought me eggs and it waslike two crates of eggs.
I am not going to eat them.
Yeah.

Rick Costa (15:58):
It's more for big families, yeah.

I just, but also just I mean, I go to the regular
grocery store but I also, firstof all, I like the walk and
secondly, it's because I don'tneed that much on a weekly basis
and I do get fruits andvegetables and those don't last
too long and I don't buy likeI'll never buy like five bananas
, you know, I'll just buy two.

(16:22):
So they'll go bad if I do.
And we said well, you contactcustomer service, they refund
you, but I don't think they care.
Honestly.
I see what you're saying andalso it doesn't matter in a way,
because, like when I order food, like from a restaurant, if
they mess it up and I, you know,let them know and, yeah, they
reimburse, it still messes up.

(16:43):
You were just about to eat.
So I can only imagine, like ifKimberly ordered apples, you
know, and they were gala apples,and she got whatever the other
app.
I only eat gala apples, but youknow what I mean.
She got the other apples, theywere green apples.
It's going to mess up her applepie cooking as long.
Yeah, so I get you.
I understand that is a problem.

(17:04):
I'm not.
I swear I was going to turnthis off.
I'm not even looking at it,just turn it off.
Turn it off.
You know what it was.
I left it on in case you textme or something you know.
You want to talk about jealousy, or do you want?
to talk about characters ontelevision shows and writing.
I'm just kidding.

Rick Costa (17:27):
Yeah, we can talk about that eventually.
But yeah, the stuff I've beentelling you about, it's like
I've learned so much.

WGA this is my magazine from SAG-AFTRA.
We're still on.
Oh okay, yeah, that's what thatis.
Yeah, we get a magazine everymonth, but we're still on it's
backwards for us.
It's backwards because, oh myGod, no, I know why.

Rick Costa (17:46):
I know why.

I know but this is why I said this thing that
your camera needs to beauthentically the way you would
see you.

Rick Costa (17:51):
No, you don't have to, you don't have to Drayden
you said that.

You said that you were like if I were to see you
in person, you wouldn't look thesame, or something.
That's what you're saying.
What?
What you would say?
The way we see you is not theway you see on camera.

Rick Costa (18:05):
Well yeah, just like when you look at a mirror,
you're looking at.
What you see in a mirror is notwhat everybody else sees.

I know, but this is what I see in the mirror is
fabulous.
I want you to see what I see inthe mirror.
Okay, so the reason so I alwaysflip my camera.
I don't even know how to flipit back, because I do it on my
actual camera, not on the yeah,don't worry about it.
I know, because it would flipeverything right.
No, it would just flip me.

Rick Costa (18:35):
I mean, yeah, your whole, everything would flip
around, yeah.

Okay, let me see if I can do it.

Rick Costa (18:39):
You're going to do it now.

Yeah, why not?
It would be funny, wouldn't it?

Rick Costa (18:41):
I think you could do it.
Let me see, can you reach me?

I'm looking, okay , yeah yeah, mirror.
Oh horrible.
No, oh my God, oh my God.
Okay, this is why I do it.
Okay, wait, let me put this upnow, so you can see it perfectly
.
On strike Say.

Rick Costa (19:02):
I got.
Oh, that's what that says, okay.

This is why I do it, because I can see my tooth,
that I have a fake tooth, not afake.
I have a dead tooth, whichwe've already talked about on
this program, so I can see it.
It's a little bit ahead of theother one and it bothers me in
pictures.
Look at my head.
No, we got to go back.

Rick Costa (19:26):
But if you never said anything, nobody would know
.

Yeah, but that's why I do it for me.

Rick Costa (19:31):
I don't mind sharing .

I don't mind sharing, but that was kind of
funny, because I remember yousaid that I was like oh, that
looks so much more normal, right, everybody, right, Everybody.

Rick Costa (19:42):
Oh my gosh.

Okay, let's talk about jealousy at work, because
this is a thing.
This is a thing Do you want toshare?

Rick Costa (19:54):
Well, I remember like one guy he used to work at
the company For some reason, I'mlike yo, I've been here for 20
years.
You just got here and you allact like.
You're trying to act likeyou're my boss and I'm like but
yet you're asking me how to dothis, that and the other.
I'm like stop acting likeyou're my boss, though, dude.

(20:16):
I'm like why are you doing this?

Wait, did you tell him that though?

Rick Costa (20:19):
No no.

Yeah, because that's such a thing.
Okay, so the guy was jealous ofyou, but you never confronted
him about it.

Rick Costa (20:27):
No, I was like okay, I don't want to deal with drama
.
I was like I'm just dealingwith this guy and whatever, but
do you ever get jealous of otherpeople?

And this answer is interesting because work,
work wise anywhere, I meananywhere, jealousy in general, I
mean it's not my nature,honestly.
I think it's everyone's nature.
I'm just going to stop youright there.
I was waiting for.
Everybody says that.
Everybody says I'm not jealous,I don't get jealous, it's part
of human nature.
How could you not get jealous?

Rick Costa (20:58):
I mean, even when I was married, if I saw my ex
talking to somebody, I wouldn'tbe jealous.
I'm like she's still cominghome with me.
So you talk all day you want to.

Okay, but I'm not saying in that instance, that's
about being honorable and agood man, that's the I don't
know.
But okay, this is why I wantedto bring this up, because I
think we put a negative spin onso many things that are just
natural to our human spirit.
Like, I don't think in general,jealousy is a bad thing.
It's what we do with jealousy.

(21:27):
That that is the problem, Ithink.
For me, what I see in jealousythat I think is a really great
thing is that we end up tryingto be better.
When we see something that weadmire or are jealous of, like,
if we really look at it, likewhen I get jealous of a woman,
like if I see a beautiful womanand she wearing an outfit that I

(21:49):
know I could never play outlike I could never work that
outfit, I get jealous becauseI'm like oh, I got to go home
and figure out a cute outfitwhere I can be working my magic
that way, you know.
And what I do with jealousy isI will give that woman I don't
care who she is a compliment,because it takes it out of you
and that's something I learned along time ago.

(22:11):
And when it comes to work.
The reason why this came up atwork the other day for me was,
you know, I manage quite a fewdifferent people in different
circumstances and I have thesepeople who are so jealous of
each other that every time weget into a situation where we're
working on a project together,they're like no, no, I can do it
.
No, no, I can do it.
And I'm like, oh my God, it'snot a competition.

(22:32):
And if I talk to themseparately, I'll be like you
don't need to be jealous of him,and she'll be like I'm not
jealous of him, I'm not jealousat all.
I'm like, okay, okay, okay,cool, okay, I'm glad we got that
out of the way.
You know, I don't know, I don'tknow how else to explain that
jealousy doesn't have to be abad thing.

(22:53):
The fact that everyone gets sodefensive, the fact that
everyone pretends they're notjealous instead of seeing it for
what it is, it's just a littleinstinct in us that lets us know
that, wow, I want that, or Iwish I could be that.
All right, like I'm so jealousof Beyonce, I wish I could sing
and dance and, more importantly,wear them outfit she wear, and

(23:13):
every day.
I don't know if you've beenseeing her Instagram, you
probably don't follow Beyonce,huh.

Rick Costa (23:17):
I'm not sure, I don't think so.

Well, whatever, she is displaying all of her
costumes in her concert andthey're by magnificent fashion
designers.
But the thing is, it's justremarkable how you know, because
you got to be able to carrythat off.
It doesn't matter ifsomething's made for you, if you
can't walk in that presence,you know, I mean, that's just
the whole other thing.
But I'm like, oh my gosh, shelooks so good.

(23:42):
You know, ain't nothing wrongwith that, but if I started
calling her the B word or Istarted being like, well,
whatever, she's not really agood actress or something, but
hopefully that's when jealousybecomes a problem.

Rick Costa (23:59):
Yeah, yeah, I can see that.

That's what I'm saying.
But but you don't, you don'tlike confrontation.

Rick Costa (24:06):
That's true, I can't deny that.

I'm going to do a Tony, bring it.

Rick Costa (24:11):
Does it?

Tony, is it Tony who does that?

Rick Costa (24:14):
I'm going to do another, tony.

I can't believe you just.
Oh, that was cruel.

Rick Costa (24:22):
That's not happening on my show.

ever again, you cannot be cool to Tony.
Like, and he's been really good, from what I understand.

Rick Costa (24:30):
He's going to get me for that.

if you have a nice person, I hope he gets you
like really good too, becausethat was cool.
That was cool, and I'll behonest though that's good.
Hi Jean, I guess, I don't know,beyonce inspires you, but do
you wish you had what she hasinstead of her?
Do I wish I had what she hasinstead of?

Rick Costa (24:52):
And he's being instead of have the stuff
instead of or be her.
Is that what?

you're saying I don't want to be her, I don't
know if she inspires me.
I said that was an interestingthing.
I don't know if she inspires.
I love her music, I do, youknow.
I love dancing to it, I lovethe power in it, I love I kind
of like her, her essence and howshe's putting herself out there

(25:19):
and I love that she's creatinga space for artists, not just
for herself, but you know thesefashion designers and you know
other women who are in her bandand concert or whatever.
Like it's kind of the TaylorSwift thing too.
Like you just really admirepeople who are pushing that
envelope and pushing us forwardas a society, you know.

(25:40):
But I don't know if sheinspires me.
And do I wish I had what she hasinstead of her?
Well, first of all, I don'tneed to have something more
instead of somebody else.
Like maybe we could both havestuff.
Like I think that's what youmean.
Like do I wish I had it and shedidn't know?
I'm not that cruel of a person.
I wish we could all haveeverything that we individually

(26:06):
want and need without steppingon someone else or hurting
another person, or does thatmake sense?
Am I sounding?

Rick Costa (26:12):
weird.
Yeah, yeah, definitely yeah.

I wouldn't want anything instead of her, but but
I just I like her.
I don't know, do you have anartist like that that you like,
that you think is amazing?

Rick Costa (26:23):
I mean my realm is more the Christian realm.
So totally different people.

But did you not see my tiktok the other day
about?
I smile.

Rick Costa (26:37):
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah , yeah, kirk Franklin, yeah,
yeah that was so cool.

What happened right it?

Rick Costa (26:41):
was awesome Did.

I ever talk about that I did on the Instagram not
on here, but if you want totalk, Basically, what happened
was I was walking in this areaIn Santa Monica, but it's like a
very exclusive kind of in thecanyon area and it's, you know,
these beautiful homes and a lotof people don't walk there.
It's a very quiet place andwhen it's the weekend or

(27:02):
whatever, I don't want to godown to the beach because
there's a lot of touristy people, you know.
So I was minding my businessbut I had my head set on and I
was, you know, I didn't realizeI was singing so loud.
Anyway, so I'm walking down thestreet minding my own business,
I have my head set on and Ididn't realize it, but I was,
you know, just doing my thingand I do, I do a little, not

(27:24):
dancing crazy, but you know, Iget into it or whatever,
especially nobody's around.
And a bike came from behind me,they were on the street and
it's these are little sidewalksis a very Well-to-do area.
So you know they got, no bigsidewalks would be hanging
around, you know.
And he went like this to me andand I was like what, what?

(27:44):
You know what I mean and hethen he stopped and he turned to
me and he said you are singingso on key, it's awesome and I
didn't realize I was singing soloud.
And then people were walkingtowards me, right, so they were
walking.
They weren't that far ahead ofme, but they were walking
towards me.
Whatever they're like, we lovethat song and I was.

(28:05):
So I Was singing, I smile, Iwas seeing it very loudly and I
Singing voice.
I can't stay on key but I donot have a a Whitney Houston
voice, so I was singing, I smile, so it was just very funny, but
yeah, it was a great song.

(28:27):
It is a great song.
So back to you were saying yourfavorite artist.
I said do you have somebodythat's like Beyonce?
That's why we brought up what'shis name?
What sings the song?

Rick Costa (28:38):
Kirk Franklin.

Kirk Franklin.
Yeah, religious yeah he's upthere.

Rick Costa (28:43):
He's definitely up there.
Yeah, so many, though so manysongs of his are amazing, really
, really good songs.
Fred Hammond it's another bigone.
He's pretty well known.

By the way, and that's the only song I listened
to really, cuz you know.
I mean I listen to other gospelmusic, but it's not because
it's the gospel music part of it, right?
The?

Rick Costa (29:11):
one other song that almost everybody knew for some
reason, of Kirk Franklin wasstop.
And when I think about there'sa little crossover.

It go like, whenever you have a song, I mean
that's what happened withTaylor Swift, right, she was a
country singer, and then it itcropped whatever her I don't
even remember what it was, butthere was a song that crossed
over and you realize that it was, you know, more pop or whatever
.
It's kind of the same thing.
So yeah, I mean I Lovelistening, like if I were to go

(29:45):
to a church and listen to gospelmusic.
That's a whole other ball game,that's.
That's a whole.
That's just an experience andthat is quite powerful.
But I don't tend to listen togospel music on a regular basis.

Rick Costa (29:59):
You don't go to a Kirk Franklin concert.

I don't think I could do that either.
I Mean I would go to a churchand listen to him.
That's what you meant.

Rick Costa (30:11):
Church doesn't matter.
The venue, I don't care.

Does he have concerts like Beyonce?
I'm sure he does.
Oh yeah, I think the antigoplaces yeah yeah, yeah, I mean I
think if it was first of all.
I don't do concerts unless I'mVIP.
Again, I don't like crowds orwhat I hear Tony saying boozy,
boozy totally, absolutely boozyand I have been to several

(30:38):
concerts and VIP and one of myfavorites was I saw.
Do you know who Gordon Sumneris?

Rick Costa (30:46):
Sounds familiar.

It's his real name for what it's.
It's not the name he goes by,but it's his real name.
But I saw him twice, vip, likehe was this close to me.
Come on, does nobody know whoGordon Sumner is such a easy one
?

Rick Costa (31:05):
sounds so familiar it is.

It's easy.
Okay, let me see if I can singa song that he is.
I can't sing the chat slow bythe way.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah and everymove you make it stink.

Rick Costa (31:19):
Okay, cuz didn't I?
Um, didn't somebody do a remakerecently, or that?

You're talking about the compilation with puff
daddy or something.
They did it as a song to BiggieSmalls and Tupac and Princess
Diana and it's a.
They took his song.
Actually that's a really greatvideo to watch because they did
it like the Grammys or somethingand Sting comes up and sings
his part, which is not reallypart of it.
No, they usually just.
They sampled his music andthey're saying goodbye to Tupac

(31:48):
and Biggie, but I'm surprisedyou knew that one.
I'm up to send you that link.
Yeah, yeah but um, but yeah, Isaw sting and Good job, chris.

Rick Costa (31:57):
by the way he got it .

He totally got it .
Yeah, your prize is Let me seewho else I saw.
I haven't seen a lot ofconcerts because I don't like
crowds.
I Hmm I saw.
Of course you know I saw GeorgeMichael.
Okay, regrets, that's also onthe list.
Regrets I never saw Prince inconcert.

Rick Costa (32:18):
Oh, we talked about that before.

Heartbreaking, did you even like Prince?

Rick Costa (32:23):
I mean, I think you asked this before.
I think, there were definitelysongs that I was like, yeah,
it's nice, that's cool song, butI wasn't like a huge fan.

Oh my god, I was a huge fan.
I'm still here.

Rick Costa (32:32):
I was kind of in the Christian realm things up.

Yeah, but you said okay, you got to stop
saying that, because you sent meyour YouTube list of 80s music
and there's not one gospel songon there.

Rick Costa (32:45):
Well, yeah, that was on purpose.
All songs that I remember,songs that you literally can't
get away from, because when yougo to a store they're playing
the radio and you hear all these, something you can't get away
from.

That they're playing these songs, because I
have not heard some of thesesongs in forever.

Rick Costa (32:57):
Bob's, and I remember them like Long stick in
my head.

Some of the songs I don't like that you picked
though.
I mean there's over what?
200 of them.

Rick Costa (33:07):
So that wasn't, and I wasn't even necessarily trying
to pick like oh, this is afavorite of mine.
I was just trying to think like, oh, this makes me think of
that time period.

Okay, so my regret is that I didn't.
I mean, that's one of myregrets is that I never saw
Prince in concert, and Partiallybecause when people that I knew
were going to go, it wasn'tlike VIP and I wasn't even in a
place to know.
I just I don't like crowds.
I don't unless I'm I know thisis again we can hear Tony and

(33:37):
Brian.
She's so bougie Like.
If I'm on stage and there's alot of people, that's one thing,
but if I have to be in a crowdof people, I get very
Clustrophobic, I get very antsy,I get very quiet, which I guess
a lot of people would like.
So that's, I don't like crowds.
So, okay, what regrets do youhave?

(34:00):
Just one name, one regret.

Rick Costa (34:02):
Like in life, in life.
Oh hey, one big one thatdefinitely changed my life was
at a job that there was a.
It was another I could have gotlike it was a promotion
basically, and I wasn't evengonna go for it Cuz I just like
I was happy where I was, it wasfine.
What?
Yeah, it would have been mademore money, but I'm like, but
I'm cool here, I'm happy, thisis like my family, I'm happy I'm

(34:25):
.
And then my boss was like, I'msure, as everybody that I
thought was gonna go for the jobwent for it.
But you, I thought you weregonna go for it.
I was like, really, I didn'teven think about it, like I'm
cool here, did it up.
But she kind of was like Ithink you should try, you should
try.
And I was like All right, I'lltry, but I'm not gonna get it
cuz these other people are therebetter than me.
But blah, blah, blah.
Well, I got it.
So yay.

(34:46):
But it wasn't a yay Becausethree months later and I think
I've mentioned this to youbefore they did a company-wide
layoff and there was people inevery department they got canned
.
So I was yeah, I talked aboutthat.
I think was either.

Right, right, right so that was a regret.

Rick Costa (35:02):
I should have just stayed where I was happy I don't
know.

I don't know.
I think it's good that youtried to move up, I Mean, did
you feel it in your belly thatyou didn't want to do it?
But you didn't, because I justtold you to.

Rick Costa (35:14):
I didn't have any desire to, but Okay, yeah,
that's legit, like I didn't.
I didn't feel like, oh, this issomething I should do, like in
me.
She just kept.
She kept saying I think youshould try, she could try.
I'm like all right, I'll try,I'm not gonna get it.
I didn't think I'm gonna get itand I got it.

I Think you know I have another regret.
I bought a condo In Brentwood.
This was before the crash, youknow, before the the the economy
Did the downturn in 2007, 2008?
Because before then everyonewas like you have to buy real
estate, you have to do.

(35:50):
And I had a business manager atthe time who was like you
cannot be giving your money away, you have to invest.
You can't write this as a taxwrite-off and the thing is I
liked giving my like.
When I had money, I likedgiving it away.
I don't know why people thinkgiving money away Doesn't make
you happy and I don't know whyeveryone, everybody always gives
money away and it has to be atax write-off.

(36:12):
Hey, rich people, it doesn't.
It doesn't have to be a motherflowering tax write-off.

Rick Costa (36:17):
You know what you?

just give money away and help people.
You know, it's one of my my petpeeves about rich people.
They always want to give moneyaway because it's a tax
write-off, so it's doingsomething for them, so it's not
really a genuine help.
And here's the thing you can'thelp individual people Because
you can't get a tax write-off ifthey're not a nonprofit.

(36:39):
So it's that weird thing.
So I, you know I was making allof this money.
I was Beyond belief and I wasgiving my money away and
everybody, and their mother, whoI knew, was telling me you have
to buy a condo, you have to buyproperty, you have to do this.
And that was one of the biggestmistakes of my life.
You know it was.
It was a beautiful condo, isfantastic, but I ended up having

(37:03):
like four floods, I ended upbeing miserable and then the
economy turned, so I ended uplosing it anyway.
Rich people give money away totheir own foundation.
Those are corrupt rich people,chris.
But yes, those are.
Those are people who do itwrong.
But there are people who do itright and they give money to
their foundation or they givemoney to other foundations and I

(37:23):
ain't got no issues with that.
If you help and people.
I ain't gonna be mad at youabout that, but because I've
worked for so many wealthypeople, what bothers me is,
instead of just helping peopleout, the kindness of your heart
and realizing that this, thereis such a joy that happens when
you get and look at, I ain't gotno money.
I'm just saying from my littleexperience, when I give to

(37:48):
people and they don't even askfor it, like you just helping
somebody, there is such a joy inmy heart for you get something
out of that.
That's bigger than a taxwrite-off and I don't know what.
Yes, bill and Melinda Gates.
I think my, my, my Respect forthem came from the fact that
Warren Buffett gave all of hismoney to them and said Do what

(38:10):
you need to do with this, youknow, I mean, which I think is
kind of cool, and his kids.
You know his kids are fine, butthey're not inheriting all his
wealth, which I think is amazing.
No, but he's the extreme.
You know he's not the nor, butit gets to that thing where how
much money does one person need?
I mean, you know, you know, andit's sad, and especially in

(38:33):
this country, like you know, abillion isn't enough.

Rick Costa (38:37):
Yeah, that's crazy.
It's crazy.
I remember in um in schoolprobably High school more who
remembers cassette tapes?
So there's these littlesquirish and I used to just like
make take top ten hits,whatever, and just give people
cassettes of oh, why are yougiving this to me?
Cause don't you like this kindof music.

Yeah, okay when boys know you, me, though, I
knew they liked me.

Rick Costa (39:04):
Oh no, I just did it because I'm like I just I like
to just be generous and givestuff.
You like this kind of musicright here, Take it, oh.
Or I would make like ifsomebody was like I'm getting it
work, I'm gonna work out, butuh, so I'd find songs that were
good for work out.
I'm like yeah, I made this foryou.
Like really, what do you want?
Nothing, I just give it.
Just take it why are youthinking back?

But I think back then too.
I don't know about you, but Idon't think there was such a a
Weirdness about doing things forother people.

Rick Costa (39:31):
You know, Even even this article, just to bring it
back full circle what so funnymade me think of a video I just
saw and I shared it with a fewpeople.
So it was the son in thekitchen.
He was cooking something in apan and he was obviously
listening to Mariah Carey and hewas singing really loud.
But you can hear the MariahCarey song okay.
And the parents are look at himlike you doing, what are you

(39:53):
doing?
So he's just jammed that it upand then all of a sudden it
switches to him.

You never want to sing out loud.
Tomorrow I carry cuz she hitsthem notes One of my favorite
moments all the time, and thisis like a regular thing me and
my goddaughter do.
She's 15, she's gonna be 15.
Every time I pick her up, wealways listen to George Michaels
careless whisper and we bothsing it at the top of my lungs

(40:32):
because, like, it's just funny,because, you know, not singing
Wonderfully, but it's been ourthing since she was a little kid
is just so funny, you know.
But I imagine that, like if youturned off the sound, oh, he's
so wrong.
Okay, I'm sorry.

Rick Costa (40:53):
There's just something fun about watching
somebody sing with joy, even iftheir voices and good, but you
see they're having fun.
It's like go ahead, okay.

So here's the rest of that story though.
So when I got up the hill, whenI'm walking with my headset
after the people Acknowledgedand whatever.
So I went this way cuz I wantedto walk up this really hard
hill.
So when I get I'm trying to getback on track.
You know with.
I used to run that hill, so itreally angers me that I can't
run it anymore.

(41:22):
Charlie, that's one of the songsalways think about we got to
talk about.
Charlie.
So glad to see you, miss you.
So I walked up this hill andwhen I got up there, the guy on
the bike he rode all the way upthere so he was dying right.
So he had stopped and he waskind of waiting for me and so we

(41:45):
met.
His name is van.
He's cool.
He lives in the neighborhood.
It was like a really cool thing, you know.
It's like it wasn't just thatone moment.
So we started talking about thesong.
He's not very religious but helikes his.
I'm like I'm not that religiouseither, but it's a really good
song.
It was cool and it was aboutjoy.
That's kind of what he said.
He's like you were just so init.

(42:06):
He was like nobody was in yourworld, like you didn't even
notice that the people werewalking and then I was coming by
.
He's like you were just so init.
I'm like that's such a boozy.
I didn't say this damn, butit's such a you don't want to be
singing that loud.
So yeah, that's so cool.
I can't believe Charlie'sstopping by saying you got to

(42:27):
have faith.
Mm-hmm, I got faith.
We talked about George Michael.

Rick Costa (42:30):
Yes, yes, um, did you like to think?
I gotta have faith to think, tothink, yeah, some of the songs
are cool.

I thought we were gonna keep singing.
I Miss George Mike.
I loved him, love, I still lovehim, I love him.
Those are my favorites PrinceGeorge, michael, rita Franklin,
freddie Mercury.

Rick Costa (42:52):
You know some of these people died early.
Though my gosh crazy.

Well, I mean, we know why they died early.
I mean, prince, you know, wasunfortunately Addicted to his
medication and it's sad, right,it's sad.

Rick Costa (43:08):
I mean like individually, why did this one?
I'm just saying, why does ithave to happen?
It's oh People that have suchamazing talent and they go so
soon, you know.

I don't know and it's, and that's how.
Those are the moments when Ifeel old.
Right, those are the momentswhere I feel old because I
realize all of my people that Ilisten to growing up Whitney
Houston, michael Jackson, georgeMichael, all of that, like all
of them, prince, I mean, thoseare me growing up.

Rick Costa (43:37):
Yeah.

I'm trying to think who else?

Rick Costa (43:39):
Whitney was the one that hit me the hardest.
Oh did, oh yeah, that hit methe hardest.

That was.
That happened right before theGrammy Awards too.
That was.
That was in the right hand ofBeverly Hilton, I believe right.
So did you cry?

Rick Costa (43:53):
Oh yeah, Really, I was in shock.
I was like what?
No, that's not right, that'snot real.
This is you're lying.

Charlie, you need to come on the show.
That's what you need to do.
I'm going to get you to come onthe show.
He's so cute.
Charlie is a very, veryhandsome man, very, very
handsome, very, very married man, but he's still a good looking
man and a beautiful soul.
I will also say yeah, no.
I think those are the momentswhere I start to realize my age.

(44:20):
Ok, wow, do you want to come upright now?
You can come up right now ifyou want to.
We have five more minutes.
Hey, charlie, what's up?
How are you?
I'm good.
I'm good.
I can't believe you jumped upon here.

Charlie Mattera (44:38):
Because I see your stuff and it's always smart
, so I pay attention, you know,because I could always learn
something.

You are so wait.

Rick Costa (44:47):
That's a good compliment.

Wait, here's such a compliment, but he just said
that.

Well, you know, there's so much stupid stuff
going on.
And then I know for a fact thatshe's a very smart lady plus
very good looking, and it's alla compliment, and when I see her
posts, they're always somethingI agree with and it seems that
we seem to share a lot of thesame sensibilities.

(45:14):
You know, let everybody have ataste, let the country be nice.

You are so funny.
Wait where are you right now?
Are you at home?

Yeah, I'm in the house.

But are you here in LA still You're not.

Yeah, I'm not.
Where am I going to go?

OK, but I thought you moved out of Los Angeles.

Well, no, I live out in Glendora, out there.
It's like it's hillbilly, it's30 miles away.
Yeah, wow, when I come to theWest Side, my shoulders drop
about two inches.
Yeah.

Well, because you're relaxed.

I'm shocked about how Brentwood looks.
I was over there the other day.
Horrible, it's horrible youknow I'm not trying to toot my
own horn, but when me and mypals were over there it wasn't
like that.
Ok, wait, we have to tell.

Rick Rick's in Connecticut Talk about where
you're at.

We're in Connecticut.

Rick Costa (46:09):
He's in Connecticut Danbury, Danbury, Connecticut.

Oh, you're right by the joint.
I used to live in West Havenfor a while, right At least in
the hot dog.
What was the hot dog place bythe beach?

Rick Costa (46:20):
Oh yeah, yeah, I know you're talking about.

Who's at Frank's or something in Frank's?
Yeah, I can't remember.

Rick Costa (46:25):
But yeah, I know you don't.

I've been a great hot dog and I'm from Coney
.

Island and that's the place I was just going to
say.
Did you hear that New Yorkaccidents?

I used to go to Oxford Hill House, toad's Place
, toad's.

Rick Costa (46:39):
Place yeah.

Toad's Place was great.
I saw some great concerts there.
And there was another place,Arcadia Ballroom, I think it was
called.

Are these places you frequent, rick?

No, this is 100 years ago, I mean, you know,
this was really even.

Rick Costa (46:54):
The food place.
I've been there Toad's Place.
I've never been there, buteverybody's heard of it.
I've been here the other place.
I didn't know, but yeah.

Yeah, I saw Johnny Winter at the Oxford Hill
House and a place with like 40people, wow no, it was insane.

And then I was saying yeah, but you know
everybody, so this isn't reallylike.
I know you, so I know everybody.

Well, I mean, I worked at nightclubs in
Manhattan for years, so you knowI was the guy at the front door
.
If you didn't pay me.
If you didn't pay me, I'm sorry, you didn't get it.
I'm still sorry to this day.
I know it was cold out there, Ididn't mean it, but you know it
was my doctor's office.
I had to pay the rent.
It wasn't cheaper.

It was so funny.

Wait, Charlie.

Charlie, how did we meet?

I met you in the neighborhood, just popping
an earphone In Bruntwood.
That's right, you're staring atme, me staring at you.

You're staring at each other.
There was this tension.

We did that we did that for a few years until
we finally wanted to How's itgoing?

It was so cool, yeah.
And then I think we had mutualfriends in some way, shape or
form, or whatever.

Well, you know as much as anybody can have
friends in Los Angeles.

Yeah, but hey, can you wait, wait, can you talk
a little bit about the writerstrike?
I'm curious.

Well, you know you should also be a
screenwriter.
I'm glad you brought that up.
Wait, wait, wait.

Let me tell Rick, because, rick, people don't
know who you is, baby, I knowwho you is, yeah, so he's a
screenwriter and he's done morethan a few movies.
But now you can tell us aboutthe new.

I'm also sad, you know.

Yeah.

And I was getting work and then all of a
sudden see my daughter.

Hi, I never met your daughter.

That's Christmas.
That's Christmas is her name.

Rick Costa (48:35):
Oh, such a cool name .

Well, hanukkah wouldn't work, so running down
the street 10.30 at night.
Hanukkah, come back.
That's awesome, so Christmas.

Give us your idea about the writer.

Well, you know, there's a lot of writers in the
writer's guild that are makinga lot of cake and I know these
guys.
You know everybody's on thepicket line and everything.
And you know I don't think theproducers take them serious
because it looks like it's afucking party out there, like

(49:11):
everybody's there just hangingout, you know, like they're in
high school.
But I think maybe all thewriters should figure out.
Maybe there's got to be a wayto go somewhere else.
You know.

Well, all the independence, right, yeah, all
the independence.
Why do we?

have?
Why does everybody have?
Why is there only one peanutfarm and the five peanut farms
that we could sell our wares to?
I mean, it's sort of like youknow, it's sort of like the
standard oil in the old days.
You know, you either sell to usor you sell to no one.

You sell to no one.
Well, I read an article I thinkit was the Hollywood Reporter
this morning talking about whyis?
Why are the studios not sidingwith all the artists and letting
Netflix go on their own?
Because Netflix is the one.

This all goes to the point of the studios.
Ok, your studio, what are youdoing?
You're giving the deals to guyswho can't act, can't dance,
can't sing, can't write.
They have no talent whatsoever.
The only talent they have isthey know a bunch of jaguars
that are in the industry andthey're not going to audition 12
, 15 writers, steal the bestportion of every pitch that came

(50:24):
in there and then smash six ofthem together and think they can
make a movie out of it and thenslap their nephew's name on its
screenplay.
And the nephew is going to andthen the nephew is going to kick
them back 25 to 35% of thescreenplay price because they've
got their friend who's going toorder out and buy it.

Do you know how many?

producers.
Do you know how many producerspay writers here?
I'm going to give you 10 grandjust to keep you alive, but I
want 25% of your sale price.
There's no watchdog communityin the entertainment business
how writers walk into meetingsand are constantly threatened
and your livelihood isthreatened on a daily basis

(51:04):
because you don't want to douncompensated fucking steps that
aren't in your contract.
When you go in that room andthey go, hey, could you do the
producers polish and I'm likeyou know, look at them with
contract.
Here it's the rewrite, secondrewrite.
I see polish.
I don't see nothing about theproducers' files.
Well, you know, we just want toput in a few things.
So, basically, you want me torewrite it before I get paid for

(51:27):
the rewrite and then whenwhoever reads this and says,
yeah, this is cool, Go this wayor go that way, it's going to
think I'm a fucking idiotbecause your ideas suck and
you're not a writer.
Rick, are you getting a fuckinganswer.
No, my point is this.

Why does?

the studio.
Give the deals to the peoplewho could actually make the
potato, give the deals to thewriters, and then the producer
goes downstairs, like the olddays.
And he goes past one room andsays I want a pirate movie, I'll
see you next week, get mesomething.
I want a Western, you.
I want a gangster picture, getme something.
Side-fly, I'll see you guysnext week and you know I'm

(52:08):
paying the bills.
So let's see something.
And you know what Writers wouldgive their arm?
They would.
They would because we're notgreedy guys, we're not asking
for anything, we're just askingto give me a little, and you're
only important when they wantthe draft Right.
As soon as you give them thedraft, they're not important
anymore.

(52:28):
And I sat in the room.
I was working with Jim Cameron.
This is no lie.
I couldn't get to shit thesedays.
I sat in the room in JimCameron's office.
He sent me to Moscow to write astory.
I was there six weeks.
I came back.
I'm in Light Storm on 10th atSanta Monica over there.

And I was sitting in the room.

Yeah, I was sitting in the room.
My office was Arnold's oldoffice because I remember all
the cigars were outside mywindow.

Here's all the name dropping.

No, I'm not kidding you.
No, I know.

Look, I know this is your life.

I know Do you know, when they made the Titanic
I was, my office was right nextto the wardrobe, so they always
used to come because I was sortof this normal middle size,
charlie, come here, try on thiscoat.
So I was like the model forhalf of the backers.
You see, I remember the guywould come in and go Charlie, $5
million budget just for thewardrobe alone.

(53:17):
Check out these earrings.
And they weren't copies, theywere original, antique, like
$10,000 earrings.
Everything Jim had was top ofthe notch.

Rick Costa (53:30):
And.

I loved him.
And I'm sitting in a conferenceroom with a bunch of creative
executives which is sort ofanother name for celebrities or
studio executives kids that theydon't know what the fuck to do
with.
So they get them a job in thestudio being a creative
executive, torturing writers.
You know stupid ideas.
So I'm sitting in there enoughto get right in the movie about

(53:53):
this thing in Russia and the guygoes to me.
One of the helicopter goes overthe Urals and it passes by the
Army, the secret Army base.
Why is it painted camouflage?
I swear to you.
And Jim is in Rosarito Beachmaking Titanic.
He's on the VIA satellite thing.
And also and I look at him andI go Jim, I painted a camouflage
because I ran out of fuckingred paint.

(54:15):
What kind of super fuckingphone was that?
I said why am I sitting in thismeeting?
Why am I listening to this?
I said you sent me over there.
I almost got my head blown offby the police.
I came home, I got a story.
Let me tell my story.
And I mean they would sit thereand they would say you know the
character of Yuri, why does he?
And I would say let me stop youfor a second.

(54:36):
I would say every character onthat page, every woman, every
man, every child, every comma,every word me and my friend, we
made it up man, that's pieces ofus.
Each one of those characters isa little chunk.
So when you talk about thosecharacters like you know them, I
got to tell you, it makes mefucking sick Because you're

(54:59):
sitting there and you act likeyou know something, you have
something to contribute, whenyou should say to me Charlie,
what do you need from us ExactlyTo help you kill this shit?
What can we do for you?
So when you give this to theboss, he just goes great job,
great job Charlie, great jobSteve.
And I could turn to him and gohey, man, these guys, if it

(55:21):
wasn't for them, Right, it wasall of us.
We're not glory hounds, man,we're not the go.
We don't look for the 15credits on a movie.
We just want to be treated likeyou know, like maybe half the
way they treat these guys onBroadway Got right, and you know
what.
And I'm going to be like GeorgeCostanza, I should probably get
out on a high note right BeforeI say something rude.

(55:44):
You should, yeah, I'll say sure.
I never work again.

No, no, it'll be fine, Bro.

I can't get a job.
Anymore, man, I can't get a jobanymore.

They don't like me.

I look them dead in the face.
I mean what I say and I saywhat I mean.
And they don't take that.
Yeah, but you're from New York,Well you know, never been any
different.
It's not my fault that when I gointo meeting in 30 seconds I
know the guy behind the desk isfull of shit and then it takes
him another 10 minutes torealize that.
I know that and I know he can'tcall a shot.

(56:17):
He's got to go to 15 guys andif I pitch and if I pitch to him
, I got to hope he could pitchto somebody else with the same
enthusiasm and drive and passionand ambition.
That's the problem.
Producers and the powers thatbe take writers drive passion,
ambition and they think it'sdifficult and it's crazy.

(56:39):
No man, let that horse out onthe beach.
Let him run, man, he'll makeyou out, he'll do something
really cool.
And then if you want to fix afew things that it makes sense,
they'll be more than happy to doit.
They're happy to do it, youknow.
So on that note, calm anytimeyou want to see me, homeboy.

I will definitely , definitely be in touch.
You have to come up again.

I like doing this.

This is good look at you know we're gonna have
you come up proper officialofficial guest.

I'll get a haircut and everything.
Beautiful baby man.
Now no man when I walkbeautiful man.

You know you're beautiful.
You know we'll talk later.
We gonna have you on the showwatch, wait, wait, before I
leave.

Rick Costa (57:34):
Richard gear yeah nice meeting you you too bro.

Oh my god I was fine.
I love him, but you know hispassion, everything he's saying
about the right is build.
I mean, you know, I love that hecame on.
That was awesome.
He's so beautiful, good man andknows everybody in Hollywood,
everybody.
Like when I was saying that hewas named off, it is like he's

(58:04):
not even named dropping, he'ssaying name, he knows all these
people and right, he has such apassion and you know what I'm
gonna stop.
I'm just glad he came on.
I'm really kind of just shockedhim.
You know, I'm always shocked bypeople who are listening to the
show too.
It's such a compliment becauseI don't know.

(58:25):
It's not like everyone'sreaching out to me to tell me I
can see the numbers.
I just see numbers.
Hi, jerry, we are doing well.
How are you doing?
good is real people.
Charlie Matera is about as realas it gets and that little clip
was just a little sliver of thekind of people I love.

(58:45):
You know they're amazing.
I love authenticity.

Rick Costa (58:50):
You know what I mean that's what you get with a New
Yorker totally yeah, but yeah,but that's how we met we.

I was like hey, it was kind of cool.
We just became friends.
It was really cool.
So your regrets you don't haveany regrets that are bad.

Rick Costa (59:08):
Oh, you have the job one, but still you got the job
it's like a bad, yeah, but if Ididn't take that job, I would
have still been at that companyand I would have probably
eventually got higher on my ownand it was a good company.
I the money I made there is noteven what I make now.
I've been here this company for20 years.
It was good money but, yeah, itwas not a good decision.

I think one of the regrets I have with work and
it is with brand new school,when I used to work there and
you know that's when I wasmaking all my bling money or
whatever had my condo, whatever.
I knew three years in I shouldhave quit.
I was, you know, I I think Itold you the story that one
point.
I was in the office and Bencame into the office and he was

(59:52):
looking at me and my one side ofmy face was drooping down.
They had to take me to thehospital.
They thought I was having astroke, but I wasn't.
I ended up it was like a panicattack or whatever and it was
balls palsy or Bell's palsy.
My mom's had that twice yeah,and right then I should.
It was like I was too stressedI should have stopped and I
didn't.
I stayed for another five yearsor something and you know, we

(01:00:16):
only got busier because we gotbigger, and so my regret is, you
know, not leaving a very toxicsituation and, I'll be honest,
it was because I was making somuch money and everyone was like
you're so successful, right.
So when people put that on youand you grow up in the hood and
you grow up you know the way Igrew up it's hard to be like I'm

(01:00:40):
going to quit this job becauseI am stressed weird.
But I read, you know it is oneof my regrets, yeah.

Rick Costa (01:00:48):
I saw that you liked on my Facebook something I post
don't allow a job to stress youto death, because that job will
be posted online before you areobituary it's, that's just work
, should not be.

Carmen Lezeth (01:00:59):
I mean, unless you do what you love, unless you
are in a position, like so manypeople who do have that grace,
you know, like I'm sure gettingback to Beyonce, I'm sure she
loves doing her music and herconcerts like, if you do what
you love for a living, then youare so blessed.
If you can make money in aliving and you can support your

(01:01:21):
family and friends and you knowwhat I mean like that that's
that's a blessing that mostpeople do not have.
Yeah, you know, and, and asmuch as you know, I love Gary V,
right, I love, I love peoplewho are authentic and on point
and swear I mean you.
You notice that I've beensaying not swears, so that you
not get offended.

I know you don't get offended but don't get offended
, but have you noticed that I'vebeen saying mother.
I've noticed, but I have to saywhen.

Charlie was swearing.
I love him.
I love Gary V, but one of thethings I disagree with him about
, I mean there's like quite afew things, but you know, not
everyone who's going to hustleand side hustle and do
everything says is going to getwhere they want to be, and

(01:02:13):
sometimes it's not their fault,it's just there's just too many
I don't know facets to like.
There were just so many thingsthat have to come together for
things to actually work out, foryou to be successful in the
thing, you wanted.
It doesn't mean you shouldn'ttry.

I'm trying every day yeah, yeah, but I was.
I was remember hearing likestories of people that they're
successful, but like, yeah, butyou haven't heard all the stuff
I did before that were completefailures, right?

I just never gave up and I kept going and going
and then finally I got to, youknow but there are people but
this is what I'm trying to saythere are people who will do
everything and anything and dothe side hustle and do
everything they're supposed todo and try whatever, and they're
still not gonna get to wherethey're going.
And here's why I bring this up,is why I bring this up, because

(01:03:06):
I'm one of those people.
I'm one of those people I willcontinue, continue, continue,
trying to do what I need to doto get to where I want to be.
I have goals that I haven't met, and then people will say but
you're so successful, you'veaccomplished what now?
That's your vision, that's yourversion of what you think me.
Surviving the streets of Bostongrowing up is not a success

(01:03:28):
thing.
For me, that's survival youknow, that's not the same thing.
So I made it out.
But but we all love thosestories, right?
We love the person who hasnothing, who finds their way
through.
I get it.
I'm not trying to dismiss it.
I'm saying those are not mygoals.
Right, I'm still in pursuit ofmy goals.

(01:03:48):
But what I realize and I hateto sound corny here is I think
it's okay if I do not succeed inthe way that I believe I'm
supposed to succeed, but how Iperform on that journey.
That's what matters to me now.
Not only happened in the past 10years where I was like you know

(01:04:10):
what, I don't care if I don'tmake it as a actor or I don't
make it as a writer, I don'thave my own talk show or I don't
, whatever.
All my little dreams are, youknow, I mean I don't care about
all that.
Now I want to make sure thatthe way in which I pursue all of
because I'm never gonna stopcuz it's in me, it's in me it's
not gonna end.
I tried, I have tried, I'vebeen like okay, I was a dancer,

(01:04:33):
I'm not a dancer anymore, I'mgonna stop performing.
And so miserable.
Making $250,000 a year at acompany was not enough to make
me be like yeah, no, I'm good,didn't help, so I know it's in
me to always be this person, butnow it's about.

(01:04:54):
I may not get to thedestination that I have
envisioned, but the journey andwho I am in the process is
everything to me now, everythingand can you be happy along the
way can you have joy along theway?
I say that because I think it'sdifferent.
I don't think you can becontinuously happy, but I do

(01:05:16):
think you can be in pursuit ofjoy all the time, every day.
That's why I use the word joy.
Okay, let's go.
Okay, all right, bye everyone.
Thank you so much.
See you next week.
Thanks for stopping by.
All about the joy.
Be better and stay beautiful.
Folks, have a sweet day.

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