Episode Transcript
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(00:00):
At first someone came to me,and you know, it's tough to stop.
You know, I don't think Iwas ready the first time, and
that was closer when I was inMiami towards the end of that. And
you know, I would have yearsof white knock on it or avoiding it.
But you know I would still maskwith other substances, whether I smoke
marijuana or drank here and there.Sure, but I would always somehow end
up finding my way back because Iwasn't actually trying to work on my real
(00:23):
problems. You know, I alwaysthought the substance was the problem. Welcome
to cut, Traded, Fired,Retired. If this is your first time,
thank you for checking out the podcast. There is no order to the
episodes. Just pick and choose wheneveryou want to hear some great stories from
professional athletes and coaches. If you'rea regular, you already know how this
works and thank you for your support. I'm your host, Susie Wargen.
(00:44):
This episode's guest has Colorado connections withhigh school and college, along with a
pretty deep story about overcoming fears andsubstance abuse. Cole Pemberton was a three
time letterman in football at Mountain VistaHigh School in Highlands, Ranch and chose
to play college ball at Colorado StateUniversity, where he was eventually a team
captain. After CSU, the offensivelineman went to the East West Shrine Game
(01:04):
and the NFL Combine, but hisname was never called on draft Day.
He was able to catch on withGary Kubiak's Texans as a college free agent,
but his time in the NFL wascut short due to a knee that
just couldn't hold up to the riggersof pro football. After football, Cole
tried coaching and a few other jobs, but found himself stuck in a mentally
dark place, relying on opiates andother substances to try and figure out life.
(01:29):
These days, he's in a muchbrighter place. He's a fellow ram
and liberal arts major ladies and gentlemen. Cole Pemberton Cut Traded, Fired Retired
podcast with Susie Wargen. Hello,Cole Pemberton, how are you? I'm
doing? Welcome, good, GoodAnother offensive lineman. I have this run
(01:49):
of offensive lineman right now, whichis really a thrill as a media person
because you guys don't typically talk tothe media very much, so this is
fun to get to know you better. Yeah, it's definitely honored to be
here. Yeah, you don't seethe microphone much. Yeah, exactly.
But you have a great story totell. We're going to kind of go
through it, from your beginning togo into CSU, your time in the
NFL, and a little bit ofcoaching too, which I think is interesting.
(02:10):
You've kind of run the gamut withyour your football career for sure.
Yeah. I definitely tried to staywith it, and now you're doing something
totally different. Yeah, which isfun. I love the reinvention stories too,
So let's talk about the beginning.You're born in Kansas City, Missouri,
and grew up mostly there, right. You didn't come to Colorado till
you were in high school. Yeah. I grew up in Kansas City kind
(02:30):
of on the Kansas side, youknow, since it kind of spills into
both, and stayed with my mom. My mom's whole side of the family's
from Kansas City, so I grewup there around them. My dad.
I moved to California when I wasyoung and they divorced, but I grew
up there until high school. Youknow, went to it's called Shawny Mission
East High School, played on theB team kind of played football because I
(02:51):
had to. I had uncles thatplayed and played in Nebraska and my granddad
that played. But I was neverlike a big kid, you know,
you weren't. I mean, Iwas always a little bigger, but I
wasn't like that kid. You're like, oh, that's a huge kid,
because you are a huge human being. Now. Yeah, yeah, it
definitely changed after that through high school. But I played one year in like
(03:12):
fourth or fifth grade. I hadkind of a what I thought was a
mean coach at the time, andit just turned me off the football.
And I played a lot of soccerand basketball growing up. So you didn't
play football again until you were inhigh school. Yeah, I didn't play
until my freshman year. They toldus that they split the team evenly,
which you know, was pretty evidentthat was not the case when the B
team didn't have enough kids to dotwo sides of the ball for practice.
(03:34):
But I had the buddies out there, and yeah, we still had a
good time. And you know whatpositions did you play when you were on
that B team? I still playedoffensive line and defensive line. I was
still on the bigger side. Andokay, and then you make the move
to Colorado. Yeah, I justdidn't love it. There wasn't like dying
to stay, I guess you couldsay. And my dad had moved to
Denver with my stepmom and my twobrothers and come up here for the summer,
(03:59):
you know, enjoyed it. Didn'tknow my dad well, and it
was kind of an opportunity where Icould move out here, go to a
different school. They had just openedMountain Vista. I was after the first
year there, and uh, youknow, at first I kind of thought
it was just gonna be a oneyear thing. You know. I didn't
know my dad that well. Youknow, I would see him over summers
or for periods of time. Butit wasn't like the same as when you
live with somebody obviously, right,So you know, I know it was
(04:19):
tough on my mom. And Idon't think my sister was that sad I
was moving out. You know.I think she got a bigger room and
you know, didn't have anyone tocontest with. But you get to be
the only child. Yeah, yeah, so that's a big gamble to take,
moving states and then going to aparent that you hadn't lived with full
time. Yeah, No, itwas, uh, I don't think I
really realized that at the time,like what it meant, you know.
(04:41):
I just was like, oh,something new, something different, you know,
was open to to give it ashot, and just really wanted to
get to know my dad better.Went to Vista and really liked the coaches
there. They were just good,like nice people. Coach Cash and Coach
Gardner were the first two I thinkI met, you know, and they're
just kind of end up guys thatlived by good principles and morals and wanted
(05:01):
to They weren't necessarily just concerned aboutwins and losses. It was more about
the kids they were coaching and raising, which is so important in high school
football. Yeah, it was definitelykey. Okay, so when did the
transition happen when you became a muchbigger I grew Yeah, I grew from
a couple inches freshman year, youknow, it was probably six three or
six four after that, and thenprobably another two to three inches over sophomore
(05:26):
year. So I was about sixsix six seven by the end of my
sophomore year. My first year atVista. Oh wow. Yeah, and
that made a difference. Yeah,definitely helped definitely. And so you still
stayed on the line both sides,offense and defense. Yeah, well I
played offensive line and coach Cash dida you just played one way there.
Some people thought we could have benefitedfrom going to two. Yeah, so
(05:47):
just played offensive line and made alot of good friends from the start and
kind of learned to come out ofmy show a little bit and just really
enjoy the guys I met and thecoaches I had. So what was a
one year planned ended up in athree year plan? And so was that
a combination coal of both your footballexperience and obviously you must have got a
great relationship going with your dad too. Yeah. No, it was great
(06:09):
to get to know him. Mylittle brothers were young then and kind of
just run around, you know,like little kids do, and it was
cool to be around them when theywere young, and yeah, it was
just I just felt a lot morecomfortable. The high school dynamic was very
different too, with it being anew high school. It was freshman and
sophomores only, so it was definitelynot your normal You guys ruled the roost,
didn't you. Yeah, I guessas much as you can. You
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know, you're still a little unsure. I think even the whole way through
your Sure, you know, it'skind of like there's no traditions to follow
things like that, but I guessyou kind of set someone on the way.
But it was definitely not your normalhigh school layout. I guess,
you know, no older classman tomess with you, right, So yeah,
it was a good dynamic. That'scool. So then when did you
kind of start to think that,Okay, maybe I can play this game
(06:53):
at the next level. I'm assumingespecially probably once you had your growth spurt
you started getting recognized more often,probably after a sophomore. In the junior
year, I realized, you know, with the size I had, that
that would give me an opportunity justto be in a position, you know,
because you do have to get youknow, lucky physically to do some
things. And so I got thatluck. I'd always had some success in
(07:15):
athletics, Like I said, Ihave played a lot of soccer and basketball
after I think helped my feet andhands, and and I'd always looked up
to my uncles. I had twothat played at Nebraska and one at Boston
College, you know, and onewent on to play after for a little
bit. And so it was somethingI'd always wanted to do. I didn't
realize I could do it probably tillabout then and when the coach is like,
you know, if you just keepworking hard and do what you're supposed
(07:38):
to do, you know, thiscould be something that could work out for
you to go to the next leveland go to college. So they gave
you that encouragement. Oh yeah,definitely. It was kind of just like
you're shown some ability. You definitelyhave the size. You know, you
just keep doing the right things andyou know, keep kind of walking that
path and things co work out.Did you start to get Scouts at your
schools? Did you start to getletters? What? Yeah, you know,
(07:58):
I mean they send you the letters. What At first, You're like,
oh, this is this is great, and then you just realize that
there's just like a million photo copiedletters that go out. They're all the
same, same type and everything.Yeah, yeah, exactly. You know
the first letters you really remember whenyou start getting those like handwritten ones things
like that. Sure, I meanthat's kind of was like one of the
first things that CSU really did earlierwas they had a very good personal touch
(08:22):
to how they went about things.And I mean I still remember meeting coach
Delani in the weight room. LikeI don't think we were actually allowed to
talk. Then. It was kindof like we ran to each other in
passing. Whether it was on purposeor on accident, I don't know.
But was he at Vista Vista?Okay? Yeah? So and some guys
like to joke, you know,I played Jake Potter in a game I
think of my junior year and hewent off for like twenty five tackles and
(08:46):
I think even caught like the gamewinning pass or something. You know,
So you used to always say Igot recruited thanks to Jake watching him because
they saw they saw the team hewas playing by by accident. You know,
Oh that's funny. So what thenwent into your decision to go to
see issue? You know, Idid a visit up there and did the
camp, and I mean, youknow, meeting coach Lubick and coach Delaney
(09:09):
and even coach Funk. It wasjust like I did never like questioned if
I felt like I fit in.I just kind of felt like you were
at home, you know, youraround family, and you could just tell
those guys I actually cared about youas an individual. They would ask questions
about your family, your background,and then they would remember it and kind
of like keep that conversation going downthe line. It was very Uh,
it was just a different experience andvery like touching. I guess you could
(09:31):
say, well, like you saidbefore, personal, Yeah, and when
they add that personal touch, thatmakes a difference because you feel like you've
been listened to as opposed to justgetting all those form letters. Yeah.
Yeah, you definitely want to feellike you matter in that process. Was
there another contender in there that youwere trying to decide between. It was
pretty much between Colorado State and Ihad to offer it a KU early.
But I mean I grew up,you know, in Kansas City, and
(09:54):
a lot of the kids I wentto high school with, I kind of
knew what they all go to KU. I kind of knew the dynamic and
knew that wasn't what when I waslooking for. But I did go to
camp out there, and I justknew kind of after going to you,
I didn't even take a visit tokill you. I remember I committed pretty
early, I think even before thesenior season or right when it started.
Yeah, I love it. Sotwo thousand and five, you graduate from
Mountain Vista and you head up toce SU. You red shirt your freshman
(10:18):
year, and then six was prettymuch special teams. Yeah, special teams
and kind of like the next tackle. And I think we still had like
Oldenburg and Josh Dahan, those dudesplaying at time that lit there were so
many good athletes that came through onthat line during Sunny's years. Oh yeah,
I used to. I remember watchinglike Brizel and Bemper and that class.
You know, that year that KyleBell really had a great season,
(10:41):
and I was just like, howare we ever going to do what these
DIDs do? Right? You know? Yeah? And you did. Yeah,
And especially in two thousand and seven, you start the first ten games
in the year, you're kind ofCaleb Haney's blindside guy, and then you
have an injury and you had afew injuries, knee injuries during your college
time. About that a little bit. Yeah, I had a couple of
(11:01):
different Nie scopes. I think thefirst one was that red shirt freshman year,
so it wasn't a huge hindrance,and then both the other ones luckily
happened in the spring, so itnever cost me game time during and I
think that end of that first year, I think I had a bad sprained
ankle and missed the final two games. But yeah, I mean that first
year, it was it was likeyour head was spinning again like a freshman
(11:22):
to some extent, you know,I remember going down and having the first
game play at Invesco. You know, you're just well, that's definitely an
experience of its own, and yeah, it was. It was a great
learning experience, you know. Itwas you know, you were young trying
to go against a lot of olderguys. And one of the stories of
a few buddies like to bring upis we were playing TCU and they had
like Tommy Blake and Chase Ortiz,who I think Tommy Blake wasn't all American.
(11:45):
Yeah, Chase Artiz was all conferenceand Tommy Blake took a mental leave
of absence. And I remember Iwas sitting in the cultub and I was
just like, oh, that's goodfor me, because that dude was a
good explosive player. I don't wantto say I wasn't up and forward to
playing him, but it definitely wasn'tthe first guy I was like, I'd
love to go against him. Didyou have a you are now in college
(12:05):
moment where you just got Oh.Yeah. It was in the cow game.
They had this linebacker Zach something,and I remember he started about six
seven years off the ball and justtried to run me over, which he
did, and I don't even thinkhe was going for the ball because he
just stood there and he had thisjust laugh. He's just like ah ha.
(12:26):
I was like, oh, itjust took me out. And I
was like And that was like thesecond game of the year. I think
we've played col and Fort Collins.And yeah, he didn't make a tackle,
but he definitely knocked me on myhand. He got you. Yeah,
yeah. Wow. So then intwo thousand and eight, let's see,
that's when coach Fairchild came in.Yeah, it was coach Fairchewd's and
went to the New Mexico Bowl thatyear. How different was it because it
(12:48):
was different back then. You couldn'tjust transfer out super easy and do all
the things like kids do now whenthere's coaching changes. But were you nervous?
The end of Sunny's era was reallythat was a hard time for everybody.
People didn't think that he deserved it. It was there was a lot
going on up at the top.Yeah, it was super unfortunate. Y.
Yeah, I remember when that happened. You know, you were just
(13:09):
it was almost surreal. You couldn'tbelieve it was happening the way it was
happening. He's a legend, andhe's also just one of the greatest human
beings to walk around here, andjust to see him kind of forced out,
you know, it sucked to watch. It was just done so horribly.
Yeah, it was tough, andhe still just handled it as probably
only you know, a good guylike him could. Yeah, he didn't
(13:30):
show it at least you know whatwas really going on, And you know,
I think that's why everyone just respectsand loves Sonny, you know,
as much as they do. Iwas still, i would say, young
in the head, you know,especially didn't understand what that all meant with
the new staff coming in and thechanges, and it was comforting to know
they're bringing in some CSU alum.I guess to an extent when coach Fairchild
and the Pat Meyer, who wouldbe the offensive line coach, kind of
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remember being like, well, Iguess I'll figure out, you know,
where I land. And I remembercoach Meyer kind of call and talk to
me about playing like right tackle orsomething, and we had done that weak
strong system where we always flipped,and I had played the open side,
and he told me I was goingto play right tackle, and I don't
know, I felt like I waslike being told I wasn't good enough to
do the left side. So Ikind of took that as like, I
guess I'll have to you know nowit really got to prove something. And
(14:16):
yeah, I mean we all hadto kind of earn our spots back,
you know when they do that.But there's a pride that comes with that
left tackle position. Oh yeah,for sure, you definitely want to claim
that. You know, it's onlygotten like more notoriety throughout the years.
I feel like as they talk aboutit, but but I mean both tackles
are equally important for sure, rightBut yeah, you like the joke with
the right tackle. I guess ifyou play left and then go to the
(14:37):
New Mexico Bowl, how far wasthat? It was? Uh? You
know, it was fun. Youknow, I think we had a we
obviously had an up year, youknow, he had some success and it
was awesome just seeing Gartreil have theyear he did, especially the ge get
about Gartreil and just how darn goodhe was and all those dreads. Yeah,
just the hair flowing. Yeah,she's smiling and uh yeah. He
(14:58):
just had a great, you know, personality, just a happy guy,
just ran hard and worked for it, and it was cool to see things
work out for him. And yeahit was fun, you know. I
mean we had three other guys inmy class were starting on the line,
so it was fun to have thesuccess with them and just kind of have
that taste of winning and taste offun that we kind of missed through some
hard times a year before as anoffensive lineman Cole. And because you guys
(15:20):
don't talk as much, we don'thear as much perspective of what it's like
for you guys, the pride andwhat it means to you to have a
running game that does really well,or being able to pass block, or
you know, making sure that yourquarterback doesn't get sacked, which I think
your senior year you gave up onesack or something like that. I mean,
it was there's things that you reallyhang your hat on, but nobody
(15:41):
focuses on because we always focus onthe skill players. So is that something
you guys talk about or just somethingthat's kind of the lineman creed that you
have within yourselves. Yeah, Imean it's, uh, you only really
get noticed if you do something wrongexactly, which is too bad. Yeah
no, but it's kind of justgoes with the position. And you know,
and and I think a lot oflinemen aren't guys that are you know,
(16:03):
they're not really attention is true,not that other positions are, but
also maybe not used to the limelighteither at times. And but yeah,
you know, I mean there's definitelya lot of pride and what you can
do on the ground game because itshows that you're doing, you know,
something right and keeping your quarterback cleaningup because you know it's your responsibility to
make sure that he doesn't get hurtor hit and you know, you don't
(16:23):
want to be the one that's costingyou know, his health, and then
there's a lot of responsibility. Yeah, it definitely. It definitely you know,
shows when something goes wrong, youknow, you have a lot on
your shoulders, you know, whenyou're doing something for somebody else to an
extent, wellhereas the other guys ifthey mess up, but they know,
it's just kind of tough love andeveryone's there to pick each other up and
(16:44):
move forward and hopefully get better.All right, so you graduate then?
Is it winter of two thousand andnine? Did you graduate? Okay?
You graduate after the season, finishedschool Liberal Arts degree, yeah, okay,
time, and went into training,signed with an Age out of here,
out of Denver. It was awesome, guy Peter Shaffer. Peter Shaffer
because he's the one they all used. Yeah, awesome, that's fantastic.
(17:07):
And you were invited to the EastWest Shrine game. Yeah, that's a
cool honor. Yeah, that wasawesome. I was. I was originally
not in the game. I wasplaying in the Texas First Nation game,
okay, and I was training downin Naples, Florida. I had just
taken one of my roommates actually heplayed at cu or Ryer Gear to the
airport and he was flying out theplanet and then I got to call him.
(17:27):
Peter's like, hey, somebody gotbumped from the East West Shrine game
to the Senior Bowl. I thinkit was Zane Beatles from Utah, And
so I turned around and went backto the airport. Oh, I got
to play in the East West andit was cool because I got to play
next to Shelley Smith in that game. So we practiced for each other,
and I think Clint Kobe was onthe other team. I don't know.
(17:48):
Some it was some weird worked outwhere well he was on the other team,
and yeah, we got a picturetogether and got to see Clint.
But yeah, it was cool.You know, I got to play next
to Shelley in that and got thatexperience of kind of going down and doing
the the Shrine Bowl, and itwas that's a great spot for teams to
see you too. Yeah. Yeah, it was amazing to see, you
know, the business side, thescouts down there, just the involvement,
you know, the amount of peopledown there that are just looking at you
(18:11):
and judging you and writing nose down. And the competition level was just,
you know, unreal. It's likeyou're at a beauty pageant but you're not
right. You're at a beauty passeantbut you're not beautiful, something like that.
And then you did go to theNFL Combine. Yeah, I was
kind of like, if I go, great, if not, I didn't
look at myself as I wasn't likeyou know, some all Americans, some
(18:33):
that I thought was just you gothonorable All Conference, your senior year honorable
mention, right, yeah, Ithink I honestly don't even know. I
think the only thing I always happyabout was I got that captain spot and
you were a captain, Yes,yes, absolutely, I got the Team
MVP Senior year as offensive. Thoseare huge. That's because that's a big
team award. It was cool toget that, for sure. The captain
one is the one that means themost. It just was, you know,
(18:55):
something I'd wanted to earn, andthat was definitely an honor to be
a captain there. Absolutely, Soyou go to the combine, Yeah,
I went to the combine. Youknow, I had trained down in Florida
kind of trimmed down a little bit. I don't know if that helped or
hurt me, but you know,they do a lot of different tests and
kind of did some testing on myknee, which had I knew it was
a little bit of an issue.I didn't know to the extent it was
an issue. But when you seea lot of doctors from teams huddled up
(19:18):
whispering while you're still laying on thetable, it wasn't like a great inkling,
but but it was. It wasa different experience. You know.
It was cool to be able togo and be a part of that.
They definitely like to test you mentallywith the canceling and re invitation to the
interviews, you know, where theycan do that a lot. Yeah,
they used to do like different gameslike that where they set it up and
(19:38):
then they'd cancel it or they'd moveit or I think I really actually learned
it up having one meeting with theDolphins. It's weird. You know,
you're sitting in there and there's likea panel of people just looking back at
you, firing off questions. Soit was a different Do you remember some
of the questions, Cole. Theywere asking me questions about film. I
mean, it had been a coupleof months since i'd gone through like our
exact playbooks, so I couldn't rememberthe exact play calls. But they're kind
(19:59):
of just talking about what you didhere, what went wrong? And I'm
pretty sure they played the sack Igave up to Jerry Hughes, which you
know, they show like your worststuff. They kind of asked you what
you're doing while you're doing it,and you know, Jerry Hughes was a
great player and I shouldn't have jumpedat him. When I jumped at him,
and he picked up that sack andI learned my lesson. Interesting,
(20:21):
Yeah, the mental games and thenthe physical part of it too. Did
you do all the same drills thateverybody else does as alignment as far as
I mean, you do the fortyobviously, Yeah, you do the forty.
I mean you do all those basiclike speed drills, and then they
do have those position specific kind ofmovement drills that they have an offensive line
coach run you through. I didn'ttest Gray, I test it just Okay,
(20:41):
how'd you feel when you came outof it? Well, I didn't
feel great. You know. Itwas just like you always want to do
better, you know, or dogreat, and I knew I didn't.
I didn't crush it. I wasworried about the knee and the and yeah,
I mean they test you. Youknow, they had this train that
went through the hotel, and thehotel would shake it like to it.
It was a weird deal getting theywake you up at like, yeah,
five am for the drug test.And I had a roommate that snored loud
(21:04):
and anybody'd ever met, and soit was I was glad to leave India,
to put it that way. Yeah, yeah, it sounds kind of
miserable. So did you have anythoughts that you might get drafted? Did
Peter set you up for that orhe did? He was he realistic with
you. I think we're both alwaysrealistic, you know, Like I said,
I never I don't think I everhad too big of a head going
into it. Yeah, sure,I love would have loved to get drafted.
(21:25):
Definitely probably had a little more hopethan I should have had. And
yeah, I watched the draft.Definitely didn't expect to go. You know,
I got like one phone call duringfrom Kansas City, but it wasn't
like really much. It was justlike a check in, Okay, all
right, and then are you stillthere live? Could we draft you?
Phone still works? I'm still pretything type of thing, and uh and
yeah. And then the draft endedand I talked to Peter and Houston came
(21:49):
in with a good free agent offer, and you know, it sucks to
say it, but like I wasn'thappy. You know, you know,
you have that hope and you wantthis and want that, and you know
it's only going to happen once.And I remember I went upstairs and kind
of sat by myself and felt likeashamed or like I'd let people down,
which is, you know, lookingback, you realize how, you know,
(22:10):
fortunate you really were to even bein a position to get that free
agent contract, you know, butat the time you don't see it like
that. You've just seen one onetrack and uh, you know kind of
what you were hoping might happen.And so so yeah, so I signed
that and then and Gary Kubiak wasthe head coach then. Yeah. Yeah,
he was very kind to a lotof Colorado State players. Yeah,
I remember they had drafted Shelley Iwas going down there. I think Jesse
(22:33):
Nading was on the roster, MikeBrazil was on the roster, camera,
Joe Joel had just left, Okay, Dave Anderson was down there. Yeah.
Then you obviously had coach Kubrick.I think Mark Levic was in the
front office somewhere. Coach Benton wason staff. So yeah, it was
the Colorado State Ties were crazy withHouston. I remember when one O line
(22:53):
meeting, there were three guys thereand now there put it Miami Florida.
It was Eric Winston, Chris Mywho played up here for the Broncos,
and Rashad bothered one time They're like, how are there just as many Colorado
State guys in the room as areMiami Florida players because there were two of
us playing. And then obviously coachBenton was Colorado State, right, and
he was your lint coach, ylined coach. That's funny. Yeah,
(23:15):
when you're in Houston, you goin as an undrafted free agent. Yeah,
and how long do you make itbefore one of two cuts I was
in Houston, I got cut atthe end of camp, at the very
end, like last cuts of trainingcamp. Yeah, and so I had,
you know, had gotten some timein the preseason games, which was
great and it was cool. Butthat is good. So you have the
(23:36):
film, Yeah, yeah, itwas. It was great. You know,
I got a lot of opportunity,and I got good opportunity. I
mean, I think I played threefirst round picks on the defensive side of
the ball out of four of thosegames. So it was you got to
go against some good players and waslucky to do that. Got released,
flew back here, went to theshowdown and Invesco, and then the next
day I got a call and myroommate, my buddy Steve, had been
(23:59):
kept as the other he got claimedoff waivers and so then I was able
to resign and go down on thepractice squad in Houston, Okay for that
twenty ten season. How that allhappens, Cole, It's something that most
people that have a regular job can'tunderstand because you're literally every twenty four hours
something is different with the waivers orif you get cut, and then all
(24:19):
of a sudden, every day there'sso much movement, especially that first week
after the last cutdown, so you'rejust kind of in a wait and see
mode. I just kind of that'sgot to drive you crazy. Yeah,
I mean I think that's why Icame back and went to the game.
I was trying not to think.It was just like, don't sit here
and think about it. Just dosomething occupy your time for at least another
(24:41):
day or two, you know,and then when Monday rolls around, I
guess maybe deal with it then.Yeah. I don't know if that was
the healthiest way to try to doit, but you gotta do something,
yeah, exactly, So go downand then you're on the practice squad.
Yeah, and how long were youon the practice squad? I spent that
whole year on the practice squad inHouston, which you still get paid.
Yeah, it's not a bad placeto be. It was definitely a good
pain position, you know, careerwise. Was not mad about that,
(25:03):
you know, was found a placeto rent a month to month furnished place
because you know, you're pretty muchemployee, you know, and so it
was like, I don't get tiedup in a lease, all right,
So you stay in the practice squadthat whole year. Then twenty eleven comes
around. What happens? Then Igot released again at the end of camp.
Okay, all the way through trainingcamp. Yeah, so we had
(25:25):
the lockout that off season, whichwas oh yeah, that's my own experience
of its own, I guess,you know. It was just pretty much
out here working out with Lauren anda lot of a lot of CSU guys
went back to camp. You know, when the lockout ended. Played through
camp, they had drafted another tackleand they had resigned their third string tackle
from the season before, so Iknew, you know, it was going
(25:47):
to be a battle, which italready is a battle, but it just
got a little bit harder, anduh, you know I got released this
time. Coach Kubiak sat me downand talked to me about like what my
knee actually meant to like my career. How on paper, you're giving a
letter grade, and normally, youknow, I would be someone that letter
grade comes up first, you coverhealth reports first, they hear the letter
(26:07):
and they pass over to the nextguy and just move forward. And the
CSU thing pretty much was the reasonI got a chance. Wow, Yeah,
we knew you, and so wewent further than just the letter grade.
And that's pretty cool, Cole.I mean you're not going to get
that from obviously. That didn't happenwith thirty one other teams. Yeah,
No, it was great to getthat honesty and transparency on like what it
(26:29):
was you know that was was goingto hinder me and kind of where I
stood, because you know, thatwas something that I think helped me,
you know, down the line absolutelyprocess. So then Gary cuts you gently,
yeah with reason, right, Yeah, and you go to the Virginia
Destroyers for a little bit. Therefore, I can't remember for four or five
weeks, finished camp out there withthem and was there for week one.
(26:53):
I remember Coach Schottenheimer was our headcoach, and you know, there were
a lot of good players out therethat had had a lot of NFL start
and experience, you know, andit was the way I think the first
year of the league. So itwas a little shaky, but yeah,
I went through that first week.What sucked was a player got hurt for
the Texans on the line and theycalled Peter to see if I could sign,
and I couldn't go out of mycontract with the UFL to go back
(27:17):
to Houston. And then we playedthe first game and then had a bye
week and I leave town and Igot released from the UFL team a week
after that. So I got releasedfrom the UFL and in the meantime,
obviously Houston wasn't waiting around for ColePembertons. Well, you know, they
did what they would do and signedsomeone that they could sign, and so
then, yeah, I spent acouple of weeks, you know, living
(27:38):
back in Kansas City, just kindof working out and did a visit with
like I think it was the Raidersand the Colts, and then I went
up to Washington when they had Ithink it was Trent Williams for something that
got suspended. It was the lastfour or five weeks of the season,
and it was kind of just theyjust needed a body to fill some shoes
and be out there. That kindof understood the playbook to an extent because
(28:00):
it wasn't far off from coach Kubiabeing the Shanahan system. And yeah,
I went out there and finished theyear. When that happens, Cole,
when you realize that, Okay,I'm I'm a body to fill a position.
Do you still love the game orat that point are you like,
is this what I really need tobe doing. At the time, it
was like, well, foot inthe door, you know, get in.
You know, I think some ofthat talk is kind of the looking
(28:21):
back on it. You know,you're hopeful at the time when you're young
and you're jumping at the opportunity todo it. And I understood the business
side of it. You know,I knew why I was there. I
knew it wasn't I had done somethingcrazy insane to get the position. I
knew that there was a need andI could fill it for the time being.
And then, you know, afterthat season, I didn't sign up
futures with them. I did aworkout with a group of Canadian teams in
(28:42):
case I wanted to go up there, and that was very different experience.
It was down in Bradenton at theIMG facilities, and they had like five
offensive linemen twenty d linemen and we'ddo all these one on ones. I
remember my whole chest was bruised upwhen I left. And then oh geez.
Yeah, so that was brutal,and I was, I don't know
if I want to go up therenow, and I follow just that made
(29:04):
you feel like a piece of meat, you know, get beat and you
just like that. And then itwas kind of like, you know,
I don't know how long this couldlast. I did another workout with the
Patriots and that one all right,left and went to Pittsburgh. That's when
I finally was sat down by likethe doctor and uh, you know,
your knees in this condition, we'renot going to work you out. You
(29:26):
need to seriously consider this, maybeconsidering retiring as bad. And it's not
going to get better unless you justtake care of it to get better.
But football is not going to helpyou get better. No, that position
does not help your knees at all. Yeah. And then Ray Jackson spent
the day with me, and Idon't know if you know it, but
he definitely kept me in a bettermood and helped me a ton. You
know, he's a he's an awesome, awesome ram. He is always appreciated
(29:48):
week and now works for the Broncosand and he helps a lot of guys.
Yeah, I'll tell him that Isee him at all the games.
Yeah I will. Yeah, he'sgreat. That's really cool. So then
after that you decide to retire.Yeah, so I was in the from
playing. Yeah, it was inthe Pittsburgh airport and told Peter's like,
I don't think I'm doing it anymore. Man. A couple of weeks later,
(30:10):
I decided to go volunteer and workas an offensive assistant on coach mcawayne's
staff and his first year up here, And how was that? It was
good? It was an introduction tothe coaching life, I guess, you
know, which is slightly insane.Yeah, it was eye opening for sure.
Did you find a new appreciation forwhat coaches do that you didn't have
when you were a player? Yeah, you definitely see some of the things
(30:32):
that they're up against and all thelittle stuff that they deal with that you
don't know about because there's the harderguys on the team, and yeah,
they got to deal with everything withthose guys. And then yeah, on
top of that, the hours offilm and recruiting and it's just it's just
amazing. It's never ending. Yeah, absolutely, So then you're with him
for a little while, and thenyou get an opportunity to go to the
(30:52):
University of Miami to be a GAthere. I thought it was a joke
at first when I got offered thejob I had. Then I went to
the Kentucky Derby with a friend andhad come back and some people knew I
had applied for the job, andso I got a call and we want
to fly you down for interview.And I was like, get out of
here, and he's like, no, I'm actually the director of operations.
I was like, dude, Ithought you were one of my buddies.
(31:15):
Yeah, I thought you're one ofmy buddies. Just trying to mess with
me, you know. It justwas sounded so casual, and went down
and interviewed, and you know,the OC coach Kohley was also like a
Saban disciple, kind of like macaOwain, so I kind of had an
understanding of how his playbook operated inthe structure of it, and you know,
got lucky. I got the opportunityto go to go down there,
(31:37):
and I definitely meant leaving CSU,which was that hard. Yeah, it
definitely it was a tough decision.It felt like I was, I mean,
you're leaving family and friends and leavingsomething that you love, you know,
and leaving that part behind and tryingto try something new and have a
new experience, and Coach I encouragedyou to do it. Yeah. I
had just accepted the GA job atCSU, probably weeks before, and I
(32:00):
was way before. Yeah, itwas I had volunteered, you know,
the whole year before and worked andthen I got the offering. I was,
you know, some of the coacheson the offense weren't thrilled that I
had gotten the offer and was entertainingit, I guess you could say.
And then I met with Coach Macand he was like, you know,
nothing against you know, I'm amoderate. It's obviously a great place and
I'm here too, but you know, you've got an opportunity that's not going
(32:22):
to come up again, and Ithink it's a great opportunity for you.
And so I kind of just tookhis words of encouragement, and he took
his words of encouragement years later wentto Florida. Yeah, yeah, so
and then what was Miami like?It was different. The city is is
a lot different than Fort Polar oppositesfound out. I wasn't a big city
(32:44):
guy, that's for sure. Youdidn't do the bars till six in the
morning. No, I don't understandhow you go out at one am and
you don't sleep. And yeah,I didn't drive a Ferrari. So it's
hard to fit in. It isa different world. It's like a different
planet there. Yeah, so,you know, diverse and multi cultural.
It's just it's unreal. Yeah,you'd be around people speaking Russian, then
(33:05):
Spanish and next and then you know, language that I couldn't even identify after
that, And what was the schoollike itself? The program compared to what
you knew at CSU, it wasdifferent. You know, there's definitely it
was more pressure, you know,for that staff to win. I didn't
know it was a private school.I didn't know it was like right there
in the heart of Coral Gables.I didn't know a lot about it.
You know, it was a smallschool, beautiful campus, but with the
(33:25):
football dynamic it was it was different. It wasn't a close knit group it
just wasn't the same close knit asfar as the coaches got. Yeah,
you know, even my year atCSU, you know, or the coaches
i'd seen there when I played,you know, everyone was friends, they
did things together, They you know, they wanted to be around each other.
They had more than just a commonjob to share, I guess in
an office and you know, Idon't know if it was the pressure,
(33:49):
just the environment or what, butdown there there was just a difference.
It was a lot of the differentstaff members. You know, you didn't
really spend time together unless you reallyhad to, you know, And I
didn't stop that. I didn't.It's not that we didn't like each Other's
seem to be a divide, Iwould say, especially amongst you know,
certain coaches here and there. Therewas a lot of micro management that just
felt like there was an aspect offear based you know, regime that's tough
(34:14):
and yeah, and it wasn't goodfor me. And you know, I
made friends down there, you know, the other gas were great, and
I did like a lot of coacheson the staff, and it was just
a tough environment to like build thosefriendships to where they would extend beyond football.
Right, How long were you there, Cole? I was there for
three years. Oh wow, Okay, probably should have left sooner. It
(34:36):
wasn't like the greatest place for me, and like mental health wise, just
personally, I mean I was awayfrom friends and family. I was missing
weddings or events or just everything thatwith people I cared about and loved,
and you know, it definitely wreon me. And then it was a
tough work environment that wre on mein other ways and it really just kind
of took me down a path ofcoaching and kind of there's mentally that wasn't
(34:59):
great for my So a blessing toget fired from there. Yeah, it
was great, you know. Imean we had a rough year and our
head coach got let go mid seasonand it was a while. Was a
wild night, okay, coach gotlet go. We had just lost the
Clemson real bad or. One ofmy roommates was a ga. He got
to call at midnight that one ofour corner's mom went to the hospital and
so he left. And I wakeup at like two or three am to
(35:23):
some noise in the house and kindof go back to sleep, wake up
aout thirty minutes later. And someone'sstanding over my bed, and I thought
it was my roommate, and Ihad used this laptop and I was braining
on some film. And then Irealized it wasn't my roommate and that we
were actually being robbed, and soI yelled, jumped up and chased this
dude out of the out of thehouse, tried to cut him off one.
(35:43):
I don't know, it wasn't agreat decision to chase. I don't
know why I did instinct. Yeah, we hit the living room, someone
went out the back door, someoneout the front door. So I chased
one of them, you know,a lineman. I'm not exactly a Captain
Sprinter, you know, I'm notthe fastest and you're big. Yeah,
And so they were two people inthere. Yeah, they got away.
Yeah, And you know, itwas it was wild looking back, you
(36:04):
know, I had kind of someadrenaline going. And then we just lost
bad our coach was just fired.Yeah, And and then we got around
you were the only one in thehouse. No, I had had another
roommates sleeping. Okay, two otherroommates were there, but their doors were
closed, and I woke up tothe guy pulling the laptop off my bed,
and yeah, we called the cops. I remember just being mad that
(36:25):
I wasn't gonna get any sleep.So I knew the next day it was
going to be really long now,And sure enough the cops caught them.
They'd already like pung some stuff.And it was wild. I mean,
I think it was even like inthe paper it was. It was a
wild experience. And but yeah,so Miami wasn't had a lot of bad
experiences with it. And then yeah, end of the season, they brought
in coach Ricked. Most of thestaff was let go. I had finished
(36:49):
my time as a GA there andso I was going to have like a
semester left. They were like,you can just you can leave now,
okay. Yeah, oh wow.So then you leave there with all of
those experiences and then where do yougo? So I came back to Denver.
I had interviewed at John Carroll inOhio, didn't get the position.
(37:10):
And then I was talking to acouple They were starting a league in Australia
and there are a few guys fromCSU that were going to be on staff.
They were trying to bring over alot of US coaches and players,
and so it sounded like a cooldeal to do for a year. And
then I passed on a couple ofjobs here in the States at some other
colleges that were just g A WOLSas well, but they would have been
(37:30):
good opportunities, thinking that this wasgoing to pan out. And then in
the summer they had postponed the leagueand then canceled the league. Oh man,
and those other jobs are gone.Yeah, oh yeah, there I
felt, And I was like,oh great, you know, like now
nothing's really going to work out.So do you give up on coaching at
that point? Yeah? At thatpoint, you know, just with how
Miami went, with how that went, I kind of just was like,
(37:52):
you know, I think I mightjust not pursue this. It definitely wasn't
in in a great spot mentally,kind of with having that what felt like
a lot of failure, beating myselfup and knocking myself down, and didn't
really like chase that any further andkind of just wanted to get on with
life. And it was nice tobe back around some friends and family and
feel that again, because what gotyou through the mental downs then I wish
(38:15):
I could say it was a quickprocess, you know, it definitely I
would say I'm still working on it, you know. I mean, I'm
doing much better now. You know. Back then, I struggled a lot
with pain in my knee and struggledwith opiates, and you know, and
that doesn't help. Nope, itdoesn't. And I was afraid of failure.
You know, I was afraid ofa lot of things I didn't even
realize I was afraid of, youknow, just in life and just shame
(38:38):
or guilt. I wasn't moving onwell. But I also wasn't talking about
it. You know. I wasn'topen and honest and vulnerableout what was going
on in my head or in mylife. Because too many guys that's a
sign of weakness. Yeah, youdon't want to talk about it when you
really should tough up, you know, figure it out, you know,
do it on your own. Andyet you're taught that through whether it's sports
(38:58):
or just family background or just kindof how men are portrayed. And so,
you know, I kind of hadsome rough years for sure. After
that, bounced around, tried differentjobs. I worked in medical equipment for
a little bit as an independent contractorwith Durable medical Equipment. I went back
to Kansas City in twenty nineteen,just got out of Denver right before COVID.
You know, we're still kind offiguring out life, you know.
It was I just never thought aboutthat next step, right the plan beag
(39:22):
Yeah, And like I said,I was afraid to talk about it.
I was afraid of failure again andjust kind of like wouldn't even take the
chance because I'd already told myself itwouldn't work out. So did that.
Took a couple just random kind ofmanagement jobs, and then was managing real
estate staging business and met some guysin construction and got into a project management
(39:45):
job with a residential developer, andthen met someone through that that's in commercial
and I worked for him now,and yeah, you know, I'm able
to have a job I really enjoy. I work for probably the best boss
you know, next to Sunny ifyou want to calls just someone that cares
about people and does right by everyone. And he's given me the opportunity to
work. And I'm back in schoolfor the third time working on a construction
(40:07):
management degree. That's great because theliberal arts degree great and a lot of
football players finished with it, butthat doesn't really give you that that ground
for what you're going to do afterfootball. Sometimes even to take that further,
I got a Liberal Arts Masters atMiami because I had to get I
had to get the job in aweek, and they said, this is
(40:28):
the only program that doesn't require testingto get in, so this is for
to take. So I said,all right, I guess I'm I'm going
to be a oh wow, liberalartist. So it literally is your third
time going back getting this associated it'smy third time back in school, and
I never thought I'd be the oldest, this old in the classroom. But
I definitely enjoy it, you know, and it's a great opportunity for sure.
That's good Cole. So there's agood span of ten years in there
(40:52):
where you're really trying to figure outafter you're done in Miami, you know,
what do I do? And ifyou're struggling with all those other things
too, And I mean you bringup the the painkillers and how many guys
struggle with that because such a tollis taken on your bodies. Yeah,
it's just you know, back then, no one really knew what I learned
later, you know, is howyour body actually processed is physical and mental
pain the same. And I wishI could say I was taking opiate.
(41:15):
It's always to mask physical pain,but that would be a lie. It
wasn't the case. It was tocover up how I felt and to deal
with the fears and insecurities I had. For sure. Sure, a lot
of people did go that stigma whenit first came out. You know,
you didn't want to be labeled anaddict or have a problem with drugs,
and you know it was it wasa tough to deal with. And I'm
lucky that I have a loving andcarrying like family and support group of friends
(41:37):
and a great girlfriend who they've stuckwith me and helped me along the way
and just make sure that I'm doingall right and doing the next best thing.
Did somebody come to you or didyou realize it that it was a
problem at first? Someone came tome, and you know, it's tough
to stop. You know, Idon't think I was ready the first time,
and that was closer when I wasin Miami towards the end of that,
and you know, I would haveyears of white knuckle on it or
(41:59):
avoiding it, but you know Iwould still mask with other substances, whether
I smoked marijuana or drank here andthere. Sure, but I would always
somehow end up finding my way backbecause I wasn't actually trying to work on
my real problems. You know,I always thought the substance was the problem,
when really, you know, thesubstance was the solution to my problems.
I had all these other problems insidethat I wasn't discussing, I wasn't
(42:21):
talking about, I wasn't even dealingwith. I was just avoiding them.
I was, you know, makingmountains out of molehills and my problems and
then justifying my actions because of myfear of my problems. Wow, that
takes a long time to unpack allthat. Yeah, no, it's it's
still and you have to realize it. Even if somebody comes to you,
you're like, no, it's nota problem. It's definitely been been along
(42:43):
road. I've definitely been lucky tomeet some of the right people and get
in some groups that have helped me. And I went to treatment, and
I go back and speak at thistreatment facility to hopefully good for you,
like provide hope to others or youknow, just share anything that they needed
to hear. Because for a longtime, you know, I didn't want
to admit it. I didn't wantto admit defeat. I didn't want to
give in. I didn't think Iwas an addict or I didn't think I
(43:05):
had these problems. And then yourealize you're not that special. Like everyone
has problems, Everyone deals with differentthings. Oh yeah, everyone has a
different way to get through it.But there's a lot of people out there
that can help you if you're openup and trust them. And what was
the most helpful as far as thegroups that you went to just kind of
meeting like minded people that had beenthrough the same thing, guys that helped
(43:27):
a lot of success in life andin you know, dealing with their past.
Yeah, and just seeing where they'reat now and being able to be
open, honest and vulnerable with themand not worry about judgment or anything,
and learning how to have self acceptance. You know, I am where I
am. You know, I don'tplay that comparison game that I used to
when I was younger. Yeah,you know, that should have would have
(43:50):
cut us. You know, thoseare dangerous, especially if you like living
start living in them. And Ithink you know, when we were younger,
they had all the social media wasa rage, and it was easy
to fall into comparison traps or thinkthat life should be a certain way.
I mean, life is definitely betternow than probably it's ever been. Oh
that's good, you know. Yeah, I'm happy and healthy, and I
have a different appreciation for a lotof the little things in life and a
(44:13):
lot to look forward to. Andthat's great, that's awesome, Cole.
So what would you tell people thenthat are going through You know, you've
had struggles alone, just with theinjuries and things like that throughout your career,
but then you have on top ofthis other struggles that became a substance
issue. What would you tell people? What do you tell people when you
go back and speak at those facilities, You know, I just tell them
it's okay. You know, it'sokay to fail. All the successful people
(44:37):
have failed and it took me along time to realize that too. You
just need to ask for help.And asking for help is a sign of
strength, you know, it isn'ta sign of a weakness like a lot
of people like to think. Youknow, if you have the humility and
the ability to ask for help,you know, help will come to you
and you can build from that.You know, be open and honest about
what's going on inside, because ifnot, it can't eat you up over
(44:59):
time. Not be tomorrow, butyou don't know when. And you know,
we're all we're all a lot morea lot alike than we think,
and we're all not so special andso individualistic that there is no solution for
your problems, you know, Andall problems are solvable if you're trying to
solve the problem. Absolutely, Ilove it all right. Last thing for
you, your dad's the one thatkind of helped facilitate this because he reached
(45:20):
out to me and he said,when you talked to Cole, you got
to ask him why his nickname iscake Face. Oh my god, he's
talk about Can I ask that?Yeah? I had like a twenty first
birthday up in Fort Collins and everydays in the summer, so it's pretty
much just guys from the team,probably too many, just meat heads in
one place, drinking beer and havingfun. And my dad took a piece
(45:42):
of cake and smashed me in theface in front of everyone, you know,
and they were doing their oh thisis happy birthday, YadA, YadA,
YadA. Oh he hit me sohard. I think my nose bled
and no, yeah he thought,and I didn't, you know, he
couldn't really feel much with the statewe were in. But he's, uh,
he's really held on to that moment. He loves it, for sure,
he does. He said, yougot to ask him about that.
(46:04):
So that's great, Cole. Thishas been fantastic. It's been great to
learn more about you. Pretty surethat we had you on the show when
I did the Steve Fairchild Show becausewe got all the seniors in that year,
and it's great to reconnect and hearwhat you're doing now. And you're
in a great place, man,they really are. Yeah, for the
I'm impressed. Opportunity to be here. It was a I mean, I
read that list of names and it'llmake you nervous when you see some of
(46:28):
them. Some of the folks I'vetalked to you I got respect and admiration
for, and you know a lotof guys that I got love for.
And so yeah, it was agreat opportunity to come on. And everybody's
got a story. Absolutely, Yeah, I love it. All right,
thanks cool, appreciate it, Thankyou, Thank you, Cole. New
episodes have cut, traded, fired, retired, come out every Tuesday.
Please download and like this podcast whereveryou listen to podcasts, and keep up
(46:52):
on new releases by following on Twitterand Instagram at CTF for our podcast,
and also on the website CTF ourpodcastdot com. I'm your host, Susie
Wargen. To learn more about me, visit susiewargin dot com. Thanks for
taking the time to listen, anduntil next time, please be careful,
be safe and be kind. Takecare