October 22, 2025 • 46 mins
Are you longing to feel joy again, even when life feels heavy? In this uplifting episode of Faith Fueled Living, host Kristin Fitch sits down with author and “curator of joy” Jill Baughan to uncover how play, gratitude, and curiosity can renew your faith and lighten your spirit. Jill shares powerful insights from her book No Matter What: 90 Devotions for Experiencing Unexpected Joy in Tough Times, reminding us that joy and sorrow often coexist—and that God meets us in both.
Through laughter, stories, and practical takeaways, Kristin and Jill explore how to bring playfulness back into your faith, create space for everyday delight, and find God’s presence in ordinary moments. If you’ve been feeling weighed down or disconnected, this episode will help you reignite joy, laugh again, and live with a lighter heart.
Key Takeaways
- Joy is a choice and a practice—it can coexist with grief and hardship.
- Playfulness is spiritual: approaching life with curiosity reconnects you to God’s goodness.
- Gratitude journals and “joy lists” train your mind to spot small blessings daily.
- Laughter and spontaneity foster emotional healing and deepen community.
- Intentional joy creates connection—it invites others to experience God’s light through you.
Connect with Jill at JillBaughan.com
Download My Free Joyful Living 15 Day Devotional: https://kristinfitch.com/devotional
Ready to take your first step towards a more joyful, faith-filled life? Download our Reignite Your Passion Workbook and start living with purpose today!
What to feel more energized in midlife? Grab my 5 Day Energy Reset Jump Start Guide here.
Ready to work with Kristin to make a shift in your life? Click here to get started.
Christian joy podcast, joy in hard times, faith and happiness, playful spirit Christian women, joy and sorrow, finding joy again, faith-based encouragement, spiritual growth for women, Christian mindfulness, gratitude practice, everyday joy, rediscover purpose, faith-filled living, Christian inspiration for women, joy in everyday life
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
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(00:00):
Hey, and welcome back to the show.
Today I have a great guestinterview for you.
We're going to talk about howdo we find joy in our everyday lives,
and how do we find it evenwhen we're walking through hard moments?
We're also going to talk abouthow do we keep a playful spirit about
us no matter what.
Welcome to Faith FueledLiving, the podcast that equips you
to live well spiritually,emotionally, physically, and purposefully.
(00:23):
Each week, we'll dive intoconversations and biblical truths
to help you strengthen yourfaith, pursue meaningful work, care
for your whole self, and livein line with what matters most.
Hi.
Today on the podcast, I wouldlike to welcome our guest, Jill Bond.
She is an author, speaker, and podcaster.
She's also the curator of JoyShots, and she helps people find
joy no matter what else ishappening in their life.
(00:45):
Her podcast is called FindingJoy no Matter what.
And her newest book is calledno matter what 90 devotions for experiencing
Unexpected Joy in Tough Times.
And I'm excited to have thisconversation with her today because
if you've listened to the showfor a while, you know that joy is
definitely something I talkabout, and I'm passionate, passionate
about helping people findalong with passion and purpose and
(01:05):
stepping into a deeper faith.
And so I'm excited becausewe're going to talk about how do
we find joy in the everyday?
How do we find joy when wewalk through those tough seasons?
And how do we just navigatelife with a playfulness and a openness
that allows us to experienceeverything God has for us and that
he has for us to experienceexperience together?
(01:27):
So I want to welcome Jill tothe show.
Jill, welcome.
And I'm so glad you're joiningus today.
Thank you.
And I am so glad to be here.
Awesome.
Okay, so can you tell us alittle bit more about life and just
why do you talk about joy andwhat life looks like for you today?
Well, I. I started thisjourney a long time ago.
(01:50):
I. I tell a lot of people whenI was a child, and.
And I first learned it alesson on the tilt a whirl.
And any.
Most people, I think, knowwhat that is.
It's a.
It's a ride that goes aroundand around on a platform that goes
around and around.
It was at the street fair inmy hometown of Bluffton, Indiana,
and I learned a very importantlesson on that tilt a whirl.
(02:13):
And that was it is entirelypossible for a human being to laugh
and throw up at the same time.
Yeah, Joy and dove times rightthere, all in the same place.
And it came back to me manyyears later.
And this was a while ago whenthis happened, but I was at a basketball
(02:35):
banquet at my church and theChick fil a cow came bopping in as
the mascot.
It looked like so much fun.
And the cow was high fivingall the kids.
And I turned to my husband andI said, that looks like fun.
I could do that.
And he said, well, why don't you?
And I said, yeah, maybe I will someday.
(02:55):
So I forgot about it, really.
Three months later we were ata Chick fil a and my daughter, who
also heard me say that, said,why don't you go up there and ask
the manager about putting onthat cow suit?
I thought, busted.
So I had to go through with it.
So I went up to the counter,asked for the manager and asked him,
(03:16):
what, what does it take to puton that cow suit and do a few gigs?
And he looked at me and said,what does it take?
A pulse.
That's what it takes.
That's it.
No brains, no talent, nothing.
So I said, I would like toapply for that job.
So he gave me an applicationthat was clearly intended for an
(03:40):
adolescent looking for a parttime job.
And I thought, ah, I will havesome fun with this.
So I went home, got copies ofmy college transcripts, refreshed
my resume.
I made a portfolio to die for,made an appointment with the HR lady
in the mall, and I met, and Idressed to the nines, by the way,
(04:01):
for this interview.
So I went, I met her, sheinterviewed me.
And at the end of theinterview she stood up and stuck
out her hand and said, I ampleased to offer you the, the position
of area market cow for Chickfil a.
So it was one of the happiestdays of my life.
So I did a few, a few gigs,you know, some parties and, you know,
(04:23):
tramping around malls and all.
But one year later, I was thecow at the same banquet that I had
been to a year before.
And I was standing by a windowwaiting for my turn to go in.
And all of a sudden, you mayknow and your listeners may know,
ladies of a certain ageexperience an internal furnace periodically
(04:49):
that starts way down deep andjust radiates out.
It can be very miserable.
And all of a sudden I wasfeeling that furnace.
And.
Have you ever been in a cowsuit before, Kristen?
Not a cow suit, no.
Maybe other kinds of suits,but these are, they're so, so, so
hot.
Yeah.
(05:09):
So anyway, I thought, oh, oh,please, no, no, not in this get up,
not now, please, please, no.
But in that moment, itreminded me of some sorrow that I
had been experiencing and thatthat was this.
That my husband and I haddealt with infertility all our married
(05:30):
life, and we did.
We were able to have one.
One child, our daughter.
And we always wanted more,never felt led to adopt.
I don't know why.
We were not good candidatesfor other forms of conception.
And so I knew that with every.
Every furnace episode, I wasone step closer to the end of my
(05:56):
reproductive years.
And apparently the answer fromGod was no.
And everybody listening, I'msure, knows what it's like to want
something you don't have or toask God for something perfectly reasonable
(06:17):
and you get a no.
And it doesn't make sense.
And it seems like it's not fair.
Well, for about two yearsbefore that, I had started.
I had always been a deeplyjoyful person.
Person.
And I started getting sad.
And I couldn't figure out if Iwas still a joyful person going through
(06:38):
a season of sadness or if Iwas turning into a sad person.
And it just broke my own heart.
But it was in that moment thatthat lesson I learned so long ago
came back to me.
And all of a sudden, I knowthis thought was from God.
I thought to myself, isn'tthis the perfect picture of joy and
(07:02):
sorrow in the same place?
Me having a hot flash in a cow suit?
And I had to laugh because itwas so ridiculous, but it was exactly
what I needed.
And it changed the way Ilooked at tough times from then on.
That, oh, it's not just.
(07:23):
Just sad.
It's joy over here waiting foryou to be intentional enough to draw
from the joy that's walkingalongside that sadness.
Some lesson.
Yeah, absolutely.
Oh, my gosh.
Yeah.
That's amazing.
That in that moment, having ahot flash, that.
That, like you said, that thatstill came to you, right?
(07:45):
You had a.
That appreciation that, youknow, there is good and evil, there's
dark and light.
There's joy even in the hard things.
And, you know, that's aperspective that I think we can all
try to remember more becausewe're all going to have seasons.
We're all going to have thingsthat are hard.
We're going to have loss and grief.
(08:07):
You know, this year, I'vewalked through several losses.
My dad passed earlier thisyear after battling Parkinson's,
you know, and it had gotten.
It continued to get, you know,go downhill and get.
Just get really bad.
And then we had a neighborhoodfriend unexpectedly pass.
And then I had a girlfriend inJuly pass, actually just had her
(08:27):
celebration and Service on Friday.
And you know, but in all thosethings, and I know a lot of other
people walk through a lot ofloss, you know, recently and you
don't know how it'll hit you.
But in every one of thosetimes I found so much joy and love
and other things.
Even while you felt this deeploss in this grief.
(08:51):
And you know, one, maybe it'sbecause I'd had a lot of perspective
on that before from talking toother people, right.
That have walked through a lotof grief, unexpected grief.
But two, I think it's becauseof my perspective.
Right.
And that I knew that even whenmy dad was struggling before he passed
(09:11):
like the times that we wouldjust be over there, which was regularly
there was even so much.
He was just so happy to haveus and that we were there and that,
you know, because he knewfamilies that their kids weren't
present or that weren't there,that weren't helpful.
But, you know, so it's like Iwas always just have this appreciation
in this, like knowing thatthere's joy in the moments.
(09:34):
Even when it was horrible for him.
Right.
He couldn't do much ofanything for himself, but it was,
he still had such joy.
He was still so proud.
Right.
Of his children.
He had so much love and somuch faith.
And I think watching peoplelike that too sometimes reminds us
that there's joy to be had.
There's other people, a lot oftimes us who brings the joy into
(09:55):
our lives, but it's also beinglight hearted.
And you brought something elseup earlier, which is we need to not
take ourselves in life soseriously, you know?
You know, while that might notbe exactly what you say all the time,
it was clear that the plaquethat you went to apply for a chick
fil a cow job and that you puttogether this amazing, like probably
(10:16):
the most professional levelapplication they've gotten.
Right.
For the cow.
To me, it's just amazing andit just shows this light heartedness
that you put into.
Right.
You were already doing thingsand whatnot.
And you said, I'm going to gobe the chick fil a cow.
Because that seems kind of fun.
Right?
Right.
And I love that.
Highly underrated.
(10:37):
Sometimes, you know, we feellike we don't have enough time or
the wherewithal.
But really you.
You don't have time not tohave fun because it's, it's, it's
so true.
So I was at a women'sleadership event two weeks ago.
I was on a panel there.
And the woman that runs orhosts this, this group, she.
(10:58):
I GUESS she's about 75 and atthe beginning of the event, but.
Well, I'm sorry, before theevent started, so only a couple of
us were there.
It was at a local businessthat has a huge second floor, you
know, event area and they havea two story slide besides their steps
coming up or down.
And she had said somethingabout the slide and kind of said
(11:19):
what we're talking about,which is, oh, we should all just
like, you know, enjoy lifemore and do things right.
The whole, you know, I talkabout a lot like, follow your passions
and go and enjoy life.
Don't say no to life.
And so when I was leaving,there was a woman sitting at the
top of the slide.
And I said, okay, I'm gonna do it.
(11:40):
Like, I didn't even know anyof these women because it was a new
group that I haven't been apart of before.
But she was actually justtaking a picture.
So I say, okay, I'll do it.
So.
So some of the women are upthere and so she's like, oh, I'll
take your picture and video.
I said, okay, great.
So I start to go and the womendown below are yelling to me, put
your legs on this outer slide.
So I. I'm like, why?
(12:01):
So I start doing it.
As I get to the bottom, Ithink I better put my legs together
right to stop myself.
They were saying that becauseyou needed to slow down.
So I flew off of it runningand fly to a superman position onto
the ground.
And it kind of hit my arms.
And I was okay, of course,besides my pride.
But the point about that was,is one, you.
(12:24):
Yes.
I didn't know that I was goingto fall because I didn't know how
fast it was.
But it was uncomfortable forme to do that because I didn't know
anyone else.
I've never done this slide.
But I ignored the fear.
I ignored the like, oh, let'sjust go down the stairs normal.
And said, no, I want to spicethings up.
Even in that little moment,let's do the slide.
(12:45):
Because we can all be like,we're 10 years old again or 5 years
old.
And so I only share that tosay, go take the slide.
Go apply for the Chick Fil.
A, you know, thing.
Or, you know, my mom, she's always.
Whenever we go to a trade showor event, she wouldn't go be in the
costume.
But anytime there was acharacter like that, she would run
up and say, I want to take apicture with them.
(13:07):
And so for her that was, youknow, a fun thing.
And so that's the point isjust get out of your comfort zone.
Right.
Because that's often where youfind the joy and you find the little
nuggets that get you excited.
Right.
I always tell people thatthere are a couple kinds of fear
in my mind anyway.
One is fear of, like, jumpingout of an airplane.
(13:31):
Fear that I'm afraid of thisand I don't want to do it.
That would be me, do not wantto do it.
But there's the other kindthat I think that's worth paying
attention to, and that's I'mkind of scared of this, but I really
want to do it, and I say payattention to that.
Absolutely sly.
Yeah.
I so agree with you on that.
(13:51):
And yes, I'm with you.
I used to think when I wasvery young, oh, I'm going to jump
out of an airplane.
But I bungee jumped one time,and I was so petrified to jump.
And yes, it was fun after thefact, but I was like, that is not
for me.
Apparently.
It makes me feel like Ishouldn't be doing that.
Every bell and whistle wentoff in my body.
I said, apparently, I'm notmeant to skydive.
So since then, I said, it'snot for me.
(14:13):
So I'm with you on that.
That is a different type of fear.
And that's okay, right?
Because sometimes you do wantthat little voice to tell you, like,
this dark alley at night seems dangerous.
Right?
Versus.
Yeah, versus, like, oh, youknow what, what really is going to
happen if you decide to go inthe ocean swimming, but you haven't
been in it for 10 years, youknow, it's going to be joyful.
(14:34):
So I love that.
Okay, so let's get into.
Tell me a little bit aboutsome of the things that you share
about finding joy in oureveryday lives.
Oh, I, you know, I. I have collected.
And that's why I call myself acurator of joy shots.
Because I've collected so many things.
(14:55):
I could.
I could make your podcastvery, very long.
I'll tell you just a couple,though, of my favorites.
And one of them, I call it toSeize and Celebrate Moments.
Because we all have moments.
And what I mean by seize amoment is to just pay attention to
(15:18):
it.
And one way my husband and Ihave decided to do this is to take
a one line a day journal.
I don't know if you've everheard of those or not.
They're, I don't know, like,four by six.
They're not very big, butthey're thick.
And you can write there's justa little tiny space in every day.
(15:38):
You can write one word, oneline, anything.
And it goes on, though, forfive years.
You go through the book andthen you come back and put the next
year.
And so five years, we decidedthat we would like to go to bed and
let our heads hit the pillowwith something joyful on our minds.
So we decided at the end ofevery day to write one good thing
(16:02):
that happened that day, nomatter how bad the day had been.
Well, we started it in Januaryof 2020, so we all know what was
coming after that.
But, you know, of course we didn't.
And it turned out to be thebest thing.
And some terrible thingshappened to us in that I might be
(16:23):
able to tell you about alittle bit later, but in 2020.
But.
But I will say that now we'reon our sixth year, we had to start
a new journal.
Now we have hundreds andhundreds and hundreds of tiny moments
from every day.
And that's not to negate thebad things that might have happened
(16:45):
along the way.
It's not a band aid on agaping wound, but it's just a way
to change the channel in yourmind and use that book to do that.
And we have found that justwhat a delight.
So that's just one way to payattention then.
Celebrating moments.
(17:06):
Season Celebrate.
Celebrating moments.
My favorite ways to make amoment concrete.
So the journal makes it concrete.
Everybody's brought a souvenirhome from the beach, a shell or,
you know, bought somesouvenirs, brought them home.
But I encourage people tocollect everyday souvenirs.
(17:29):
So if you have coffee with afriend and you had an especially
good time, I might take thecup and put it in the windowsill
afterwards and just let it sitthere so that every time you see
it.
This is a paper cup.
Do not steal a ceramic cupfrom a coffee.
But you just get a little.
(17:50):
A little joy shot.
And it reminds you of thatwonderful time.
One time we went on a rafttrip and had a great time.
Our shoes were obnoxious andawful and gross at the end of the
trip.
So I put them on the front porch.
Muddy, nasty.
And every time I noticed that,waiting for them to dry, every time
(18:12):
I noticed that, I would openthe front door and I'd look to the
left and I'd see those shoes and.
And it would make me smile.
I left them there for two weeks.
They were ugly, but theyreminded me of some joy.
But my favorite way of makingthings concrete is to actually print
(18:33):
out a photo.
There are lots of things youcan do with photos.
But my favorite, if I can tellyou this story of all time, One year
at the my mom and I were atthe Virginia State Fair and we passed
by a booth where you could getyour picture taken with a chimpanzee
for a mere $5.
(18:54):
And I said, mom, mom, let'sget our picture taken.
Let's get our picture taken.
And she just kept refusing.
And keep in mind, I was agrown woman at this time.
I was not a child begging mymom for this.
But she just kept saying no.
And I said, why?
And she said, well, sosomebody might look at it 50 years
from now and think it's athree generation photo.
(19:16):
And I said, really?
And that was it.
That was the end of it.
We missed the opportunity.
However, 20 years later, myfamily was coming to Virginia from
Indiana.
I knew this would probably bethe last time all those people were
here.
I was lying in bed one night,they would be here for several days
(19:39):
thinking, what can I do toentertain these people?
And all of a sudden my mindwent back that 20 years to that missed
opportunity.
And I thought, I wonder if Ican find a photographable chimpanzee
anywhere and surprise my momor get revenge.
(19:59):
You can look at it one of two ways.
Sure enough, I networked around.
I found a guy with a farm inmy county.
I called him up, I said,here's what I'm doing.
He said, oh, yeah, why don't.
He said, it's cold.
It was December.
He said, it's cold.
We don't want your mom out inthe cold.
Why don't I bring the chimp toyour house?
(20:20):
And I wanted to die fromhappiness at that thought.
So on the appointed day, wehad a backdrop in our living room
because my mom thought we werejust going to take family photos.
And the handler was coming upthe walk with the chimp.
And I told my mom, I said,mom, put some lipstick on.
(20:41):
I got a surprise for you.
And when he walked through thedoor with that chimpanzee, I said,
do you remember 20 years ago?
Yes, yes, yes, she remember.
But she was all about it this time.
So for 90, I am so telling youthe truth.
90 of the most joyful momentsof our lives.
(21:06):
We played with that chimp.
She.
We would lie down on the floorand she would roll over us.
She would take grapes from our mouths.
She would jump all over.
It was so fun.
And we got about 300 picturesof all that.
But the greatest moment of theday was at the end, about the time
she had to leave.
And we sat down and my mom andI had a picture taken with the chimpanzee.
(21:32):
I have that picture on mydresser now.
And it reminds me not just ofthat moment, but every day, every
single day that I'm home, Ilook at it.
It reminds me of moments thatthe coming day might hold that I
(21:52):
don't want to miss.
And a little P.S.
to the story.
My mom lived to be 99 years old.
And when she died, my brotherand I were meeting with the funeral
director.
And he said, you know, we havea little.
Usually put a little pamphletabout the person and some information
(22:13):
just for people to take home.
He said, but we need a photo.
And my brother looked at meand he said, I have an idea, but
it might be inappropriate.
And I said, inappropriate isour middle name.
So we put a picture of my momand a chimpanzee on front.
(22:34):
On the front of that bulletinand we told the story at her service.
And everybody knows at afuneral there are tears and there
is grief, but.
But there was so much laughterbecause that story and it, again,
it's joy and sorrow rightthere, you've experienced lately
(22:56):
in the same place.
So making it concrete, such abig help.
I love that story.
And yeah, because for my dad,what he wanted was a celebration.
And so it was somewhat happy.
We shared stories, right?
And people, definitely one ofhis very close friends shared a mission
(23:17):
story.
But it was so many funny, youknow, like, it was just like so good.
It was so heartfelt, but itwas also funny and it was endearing
and so.
Absolutely.
I know what you're saying, butI love the story about your mom and
your chimpanzee.
My mom would have been the onethat would have been pulling me over.
I would have done it, but shewould have been like, please, please,
please.
(23:39):
Above my desk, I have somephotos of friends and family and
some things.
But one of the photos I haveup there is from when I was a child,
so I wasn't an adult yet, butit is me holding a baby.
I think it's a hold on a baby lion.
So it was way back, right?
Because you probably aren'tallowed to do these things now.
But you know, at a.
(24:00):
At a thing where you just gotake a picture, but I'm holding it,
there's nobody around us.
I'm just holding this real animal.
But it's like, I love thatpicture because, I don't know, it
just reminds me of.
I don't know, it's just, youknow, it's like you said, I love
looking at it, that's one ofthe reasons why it's the only picture
of me as a kid that's on thisparticular, you know, area.
And, but that one just makesme so happy seeing it all the time.
(24:24):
So I'm absolutely with you.
And I think that's the point too.
Even about your, your mom'sthe, you know, the funeral pamphlet
or information about her isthat we don't have to follow any
rules.
There are no rules, right?
I mean, somebody might, wemight feel like there's rules, but
(24:44):
there's not.
And we get to choose how welive and we get to choose our joy.
And if something seems happyor good to us or we connect with
it, or we love something, thenwe shouldn't be afraid to share it
or to show it or to go take apicture with a chimpanzee.
And so I definitely encouragepeople, you can do the same if we
just live a little bit morespontaneous, right?
(25:07):
And say, doesn't that look fun?
You know what I mean?
Or I love fresh flowers in thehouse, you know, but.
And if I don't have any in myyard, I'll go buy them for myself
for my house.
But some people I think,think, oh well, no one bought me
flowers.
You don't need permission, youdon't need to wait if they make you
happy.
Seeing beautiful, brightcolored flowers makes me really happy
as I walk in my kitchen or myoffice, you know, so it's like, do
(25:31):
those little things for yourself.
Love that.
Sometimes I will keep a crossreference list.
Other people have differentnames for it, but it'll be, it'll
be a list of things that bringme joy.
Like you said, like the flowers.
Like for a lot of people it'sbeing outdoors, just being outdoors,
(25:51):
just anything.
And if you keep a running listbecause you, you won't be able to
think of everything all atonce, but just a running list.
And then when life gets hard,or even on a everyday, superficial
level, if you have a task thatyou are just dreading.
I hate pain.
You know, if you can marrythat tough place with something that
(26:17):
gives you joy.
And a lot of times peopledon't remember to give themselves
those little pieces of joy.
I read and I wish I couldremember the name of the book.
I don't.
But this woman lost her best friend.
Her best friend died and shewas an outdoors woman all the way.
(26:38):
And it just breathed life into her.
And she said after her frienddied, she said, I went into the woods
because no other arms were big enough.
I thought that that does It.
So it's so simple.
It's such a simple thing to do.
Just keep a list and then golook at the list and, oh, yeah, I
(27:01):
need.
I need to get outside today.
Absolutely.
And, you know, there's a. I. Idon't know the quote.
It's.
It's a book I have in here somewhere.
I think it's a devotional, butI think it's Shanti, not Feldman,
but it's Feldhan Felden,something like that.
But she basically is talking about.
Her and her husband werehaving a really tough time.
I don't remember if he losthis job, but something had happened
in their life, right?
(27:22):
So they were struggling andtrying figure out what was next.
And financially, things aregoing to be hard, but they're driving
through the mountains, Ithink, in Colorado, and as they're
just, you know, feeling theweight of life, they turn the corner,
right?
They're in the mountains, andthey just see the majestic mountains,
right, Kind of with the light coming.
And they.
They had that feeling of awethat you get in big nature sometimes.
(27:44):
And, you know, she reminds youin that book or on that page that
you cannot feel fear or worryor even sadness in the same moment
that you have, that you feelawe or gratefulness, in other words.
So when we are grateful, whenwe are writing down or we're taking
note of something good thathappened in our day or something
(28:06):
at least, that we can beappreciative of, or if we are in
something where we see thisgorgeous sunset where there's purples
and oranges and, you know,pinks in the sky, and you just take
a minute to be present andreally be awestruck by it, all the
other feelings will go away inthat moment, right?
And if we let ourselvesexperience those things, some of
(28:27):
the hard things feel a littleless heavy, I think, you know, in
the scheme of things, right?
When.
When my daughter was little,four years old, maybe it was raining
one day, and she thought rainwas just the most amazing thing ever.
And I was.
And I was preoccupied withsomething else.
(28:51):
And she came up to me andsaid, mommy, let's put on our swimsuits
and go walking in the rain.
And I thought, oh, no, it'sraining so hard.
And we lived in a neighborhoodwhere there were no secrets because
nobody had a garage.
You went out on the sidewalk,and everybody knew.
I thought, oh, that just seemswrong on many levels.
(29:12):
But then I started to say no.
And then I said to her, tomyself, you know, she's four years
old once, and so we did it.
We put on our bathing suits.
She put on galoshes for someweird reason, and we went up and
down the street in the rainfor about 20 minutes.
And do you know, 40 yearslater, she remembers that 20 minutes,
(29:39):
is 44 years old now andremembers that 20 minutes.
So you can't underestimatepulling into that joy.
Well, and I think you broughtup a good point, which is I have
three sons.
They're all about college ageor just, just beyond.
And absolutely, you know, I'vewritten about this before, that it's
(30:02):
so easy to stand on thesidelines of a parent sometimes and
be the cross carpal parent orthe, you know, that we have to do
dinner.
You know, we have all thesethings to do so we can say no to
the playfulness of, of beingwith our children in the play, in
the wonder.
And we have to be careful ofthat to, to not continue to say no.
(30:24):
I was on a plane, I don'tknow, a couple years ago, and there
was a boy and a mom, I think,in behind me.
And the boy, I don't know howold he is.
I'm going to say he was 8 or 9years old, but he, he was playing
something, you know, on alittle device, so probably like a
Game Boy or something.
And he kept trying, he was soexcited about something.
He kept trying to tell hismom, but she was just kind of like
not going to have it, notgoing to, you know.
(30:44):
But from having sons that wereprobably just at the time a little
bit older than that, I, like,I knew not to say, I never said probably
no to something, but I hadlearned the lesson that sometimes
I would sit at the beach andnot go in the water with them.
And I learned, you know, whenit was a snow day here, which for
where we're from, right, wedon't get snow all the time.
Like go.
I would go sledding with themand I would, you know, go out and
(31:07):
trance around in the snow.
Actually, now I do it, whereasmy boys are too old for that.
If you will go meet mygirlfriend, then we go on a, A little
adventure in the snow.
But my point is, is we have toremember that our choices and our
saying yes give other peopleboth permission to say yes to the
joy, to the fun, to thewonder, and, and it teaches our kids
(31:31):
or other people, right, ifyou're a teacher or something, it
teaches them that they'reimportant and that play and wonder
and joy are important andthey're worth making time for.
So I think that's really valuable.
Actually, yeah, yeah, good point.
I love it.
So let me ask you this.
You know, I know obviouslyyour new devote or you know, your
(31:51):
newest book is a devotional,talking about how we can still tap
into the joy you've shared alittle bit about, you know, some
of the ways that you try to dothat now.
But what about when you'vewalked through some of the tough
times?
Were there additional thingsthat helped you continue to pull
those little bits of joy outor into your day?
(32:12):
There was one, one inparticular that I. I try to look
for God in the middle of a bigbad story.
People ask me often, whatabout the times when something happens
and there is no, none, no joyin this circumstance.
(32:38):
And there's plenty of that.
I think we all know that.
And that happened to us.
My father in law at 91 yearsold got Covid.
It was April of 2020.
He had been in assisted livingand we couldn't see him for three
weeks.
And then he had to go to thehospital once he was diagnosed.
(33:01):
My husband, we were both veryclose to him, but my husband extremely
close to his father and justbroke our hearts to be separated
from him like that.
So he was in the hospital andeverybody was holed up at home and
we were just sick with worry.
But there was a nurse and hername was Karen.
(33:26):
And she called us on herpersonal phone and said, I just want
you to know.
And she was dressed at thetime in a.
Something that looked like ahazmat suit.
You know, in the verybeginning nobody could touch anybody,
but she would continually withher gloved hand stroke his forehead
(33:49):
and say what a sweet man he was.
And she said, I hope it's okay.
I found a computer and Ibrought it in and I started to play
old hymns on the computer.
She didn't know that helistened to hymns on the radio ever
since his wife had died yearsbefore to put himself to sleep and
to soothe himself.
(34:10):
And so that was wonderful.
Well, it didn't take break,but a couple days before she called
us and said, you might want tospeak to your dad.
And so we were talking to himand he said he was having trouble
breathing and he choked outthe words, I'm ready to go.
(34:32):
And of course we were notready to let him.
Yeah, but he was very clearheaded and, and he was ready.
So we said, okay, stop.
Stop everything if that's whatyou want.
Nurse Karen held her personal phone.
I can't even tell you how longit was.
(34:53):
I cannot.
He slipped into unconsciousness.
She still held the phone andHeld it and held it until we watched
his breaths.
And at one point when hischest failed to rise and said, I
think he's gone.
And she checked and she noddedher head and she cried.
(35:19):
Yeah.
With us.
And I've always said it wasthe most beautiful, terrible thing
I have ever experienced in my life.
To think on one hand that wecouldn't be with him.
I know that time.
(35:39):
But on the other hand, that welived in an age where technology
allowed us to be with him andat least to be there in one form
or another and usher into thearms of God was just amazing.
And I said that, lady, thatcircumstance was awful.
(36:05):
Yes.
Looking for redemption in abig bad story is.
Wow, that's so important.
Yeah.
Oh, first of all, I'm sorry Ihad to go through that and I know
a lot of people did.
Actually one of my uncles, hedoesn't live near me, but it's similar.
Sadly, a similar storyhappened to him and similar outcome.
(36:29):
You know, he was in thehospital as well, and his kids couldn't
go see him and everythingduring COVID and he also passed in
the hospital.
But sadly, we all probablyknow a lot of people that had that
terrible experience.
But the fact, like you said,that you had, and I know there were
so many caring nurses andpeople and that showed grace and
(36:50):
love and just a level ofcompassion that they were there with,
with some of our loved ones.
And, you know, not everybodygot that or not.
The circumstances weren't all that.
And so thank you for sharingthat because you're right.
Even in the terrible situationthat so many of us found ourselves
(37:11):
in during early Covidespecially, and not knowing and just
the roles of the hospital andthe care facilities, it seemed inhumane,
but we didn't get to choosethese things.
Right.
And so the fact that you hadsomeone that came alongside your
father in law and, you know,you all could still be talk to him
(37:31):
and be a part of it, eventhough it wasn't what you wanted.
Of course, that's.
That's beautiful.
And like you said, it doesn'tmake it seem joyful, but what it
does is it gives us a sense ofappreciation or seeing some moment
of good or of someone's loveor outreach, even when we're going
(37:51):
through something really hard.
Right.
Like, same with my dad, whenhe was really ill, he had hospice
coming.
And for my stepmom,especially, having those people come,
the different people thatcame, was a godsend for her because
it was support.
Not just like maybe to helphim shower, but it was support for
her to talk like, do you havewhat you need?
(38:13):
You know, let me.
You know, so it.
All of those things.
I mean, the situation wasn'tgreat, but none of us could fix that.
But there was people that camealongside her.
We all came alongside her.
Right.
And so she felt as supportedas she could, and we did going through
a really hard diagnosis andthen going into, you know, the final
stages of life.
And so, once again, we couldchoose to only look at the tough
(38:37):
and difficult.
But if we are willing to look,we can find the beautiful moments,
the moments of connection andthe moments of people coming, you
know, being.
Being there for us.
And so I think that's where wefind the grace and the moments, whether
you want to call that joy ornot, but it's.
It's joyful because it's theopposite in those moments of the
(39:00):
hard and the sad things, Ithink, you know, and.
You know, I define joy as deep delight.
Yes.
Easier soul.
And with a definition likethat, you.
You can.
At least I can understand howyou could even call that joy.
(39:22):
It was.
We took such delight in thislady, and it really did feed our
souls, even though we were.
Absolutely.
I agree with you.
Okay, so let me ask you this.
We've kind of talked a littlebit about just, you know, having
a playfulness about our lives,about, you know, tapping into, you
(39:45):
know, just the other things,wonder, saying yes to things that
will delight us.
But is there anything else youjust share with us about, you know,
you've already shown that youobviously move towards those things,
that you invite them into your life.
But anything else you justwant to.
Share about that, I will tellyou one thing, one more thing that
(40:06):
really helps me, and I thinkit helps a lot of people if you're
feeling particularly unjoyfuland that to do something for someone
else.
And that is not new news, butI need to be reminded of it periodically.
You know, one Halloween, Ihave a friend, and we both love to
(40:30):
dress up, and nobody wasinviting us to their Halloween parties.
And we were ruing the factthat, you know, adults, oh, while,
you know, they just stand inthe street while the kids have all
the fun and this and that.
So we decided that we woulddress up and we would do what we
called a reverse trick ortreat, because two adults ringing
(40:52):
a doorbell and holding apillowcase out would not go over
well.
But we decided that we wouldgive treats away.
So we dressed up, we got it,made ourselves a list of people that
we knew who had had a roughtime, who were having a rough time
or had had a rough year and wewent all dressed up and gave out
(41:13):
candy.
So simple.
So, so simple.
But let me tell you, it's justjoy shot after joy shot after joy
shot, whatever.
And both of us over the yearshave gone through some, some really
tough things and we've beendoing that maybe eight years now.
(41:34):
Yeah.
So we said we'll, we'll be,you know, 98 year old ladies hobbling
inflammation to people's doors.
I love it.
I love that.
Yeah.
And even during COVID Iremember, you know, when some of
my girlfriends, they had theirbirthdays and you know, at the very
beginning.
(41:54):
Right.
Of most people weren't havingbig celebrations or gathering because
nobody knew and all the things.
But you know, I remember likewe would, we did like little special
things for the people thatmissed their birthdays.
You know what I mean?
Maybe we couldn't all betogether in the house, you know,
at the beginning at least, orwhatever, but we would go do like
you said, little things tobring them joy, you know, maybe do
(42:15):
stuff in their yard or bring,you know, ring their doorbell and
bring them something and leaveit on the porch or, you know.
But your point is we can alltap into that spirit of giving, that
spirit of extending out like alittle surprise and love.
Whether it's bringing aneighbor that you want to, you know,
brighten their day a littlepotted plant or some basil from your
(42:38):
garden.
Right.
Or doing something fun like on Halloween.
You know, the kids don't getto only have the fun.
Right.
We should too.
So I love, I love thatpractice and example.
That's amazing.
So let me ask you this.
What would you say is fillingyou up and fueling you right now
as we're, you know, in the notquite to the middle of September?
(42:59):
A couple things I'd have tosay right now.
I've been speaking for a longtime, but I'm really putting an emphasis
on it now.
And I've started speakingoutside the church walls to educators
on their professionaldevelopment days because they, at
(43:20):
least the educators in my areacomplain about professional development
days and how they're forced tosit through things they're not interested
in.
Teachers have had it tough.
They're near and dear to my heart.
That has been.
I've spoken to counselors to.
Just filling me up.
Absolutely.
And I'm also getting moreinvolved, kind of related to speaking
(43:44):
and storytelling.
So I'm going to a conferencein Nashville in October.
But I'm also going to takeimprov lessons in January.
So fun.
And also disco balls.
In particular.
And confetti.
I went into an ice cream shop,I don't know, a month ago, I went
(44:07):
into the bathroom, and all ofa sudden, the disco ball, the light
goes off in the bathroom anddisco ball comes and it's shining
around.
So I put a disco ball in mykitchen, and I also have one that
fits on your phone, so you can.
You can, you know, at a stop.
(44:30):
Oh, my gosh, that's awesome.
Yeah.
And I'm with you.
I love confetti and all thebeautiful, happy things, you know,
because, you know, we don'tneed to wait for a birthday or a
celebration day to celebrate.
You know, as you kind ofalluded to earlier, every day is
actually a reason tocelebrate, you know, and the, you
know, we.
If we still get to wake up andhave a breath, you know, and live
(44:51):
this day, that is a reason tobe joyful and to, you know, embrace
the day.
And like you said, we don'tneed to fit in some mold or be, you
know, serious and stodgy.
We can be fun and fun lovingas we get older and not say, either
of us are old.
I just meant, you know, we'renot 15.
(45:11):
Yeah.
My mom's in her 80s.
She's a professional artist,and she's all about, like I've kind
of mentioned earlier, she'sall about the fun and the colors
and painting and drawing.
Right.
So, absolutely.
I get that from her, you know,much like, you know, you probably
had some of that growing up aswell, but.
Okay, so tell us, Jill, wherecan people find out about your newest
(45:33):
book and your podcast andeverything else you're speaking and
all that good stuff?
Mainly if you just go to mywebsite, jillbond.com that it's all
there, the book.
And you can find the bookanywhere that you most.
Anywhere that you would buy books.
So Amazon, Christian Book,Barnes and Noble, all those places.
(45:56):
So.
So it's really easy to find,but my website will take you to the
podcast and to the book and toeverything else.
Absolutely.
I love it.
Well, thank you for taking thetime to come on and join us to share
your stories of, you know,finding joy in everyday moments.
Just sharing with us.
How can we tap into more funand just more real.
(46:21):
Just like real moments in life.
Right.
Things that are going to lightus up.
Because I think when we're allmore lit up, we are just a testament
to life, to how good it canbe, even though there's going to
be.
Hard and difficult things.
And so just thank you fortaking the time and joining us today.
My extreme pleasure.
Really fun.
If you enjoyed today'sepisode, if you could leave a rating
(46:43):
review on Apple Podcasts orwherever you listen to podcasts,
it helps the show getdiscovered by more people so that
we can continue to uplift andencourage people in their faith journey
as well as all of the otherparts of their lives.
Hey, and welcome back to the show.
Today I have a great guestinterview for you.
We're going to talk about howdo we find joy in our everyday lives,
and how do we find it evenwhen we're walking through hard moments?
We're also going to talk abouthow do we keep a playful spirit about
us no matter what.
Welcome to Faith FueledLiving, the podcast that equips you
to live well spiritually,emotionally, physically, and purposefully.
(00:23):
Each week, we'll dive intoconversations and biblical truths
to help you strengthen yourfaith, pursue meaningful work, care
for your whole self, and livein line with what matters most.
Hi.
Today on the podcast, I wouldlike to welcome our guest, Jill Bond.
She is an author, speaker, and podcaster.
She's also the curator of JoyShots, and she helps people find
joy no matter what else ishappening in their life.
(00:45):
Her podcast is called FindingJoy no Matter what.
And her newest book is calledno matter what 90 devotions for experiencing
Unexpected Joy in Tough Times.
And I'm excited to have thisconversation with her today because
if you've listened to the showfor a while, you know that joy is
definitely something I talkabout, and I'm passionate, passionate
about helping people findalong with passion and purpose and
(01:05):
stepping into a deeper faith.
And so I'm excited becausewe're going to talk about how do
we find joy in the everyday?
How do we find joy when wewalk through those tough seasons?
And how do we just navigatelife with a playfulness and a openness
that allows us to experienceeverything God has for us and that
he has for us to experienceexperience together?
(01:27):
So I want to welcome Jill tothe show.
Jill, welcome.
And I'm so glad you're joiningus today.
Thank you.
And I am so glad to be here.
Awesome.
Okay, so can you tell us alittle bit more about life and just
why do you talk about joy andwhat life looks like for you today?
Well, I. I started thisjourney a long time ago.
(01:50):
I. I tell a lot of people whenI was a child, and.
And I first learned it alesson on the tilt a whirl.
And any.
Most people, I think, knowwhat that is.
It's a.
It's a ride that goes aroundand around on a platform that goes
around and around.
It was at the street fair inmy hometown of Bluffton, Indiana,
and I learned a very importantlesson on that tilt a whirl.
(02:13):
And that was it is entirelypossible for a human being to laugh
and throw up at the same time.
Yeah, Joy and dove times rightthere, all in the same place.
And it came back to me manyyears later.
And this was a while ago whenthis happened, but I was at a basketball
(02:35):
banquet at my church and theChick fil a cow came bopping in as
the mascot.
It looked like so much fun.
And the cow was high fivingall the kids.
And I turned to my husband andI said, that looks like fun.
I could do that.
And he said, well, why don't you?
And I said, yeah, maybe I will someday.
(02:55):
So I forgot about it, really.
Three months later we were ata Chick fil a and my daughter, who
also heard me say that, said,why don't you go up there and ask
the manager about putting onthat cow suit?
I thought, busted.
So I had to go through with it.
So I went up to the counter,asked for the manager and asked him,
(03:16):
what, what does it take to puton that cow suit and do a few gigs?
And he looked at me and said,what does it take?
A pulse.
That's what it takes.
That's it.
No brains, no talent, nothing.
So I said, I would like toapply for that job.
So he gave me an applicationthat was clearly intended for an
(03:40):
adolescent looking for a parttime job.
And I thought, ah, I will havesome fun with this.
So I went home, got copies ofmy college transcripts, refreshed
my resume.
I made a portfolio to die for,made an appointment with the HR lady
in the mall, and I met, and Idressed to the nines, by the way,
(04:01):
for this interview.
So I went, I met her, sheinterviewed me.
And at the end of theinterview she stood up and stuck
out her hand and said, I ampleased to offer you the, the position
of area market cow for Chickfil a.
So it was one of the happiestdays of my life.
So I did a few, a few gigs,you know, some parties and, you know,
(04:23):
tramping around malls and all.
But one year later, I was thecow at the same banquet that I had
been to a year before.
And I was standing by a windowwaiting for my turn to go in.
And all of a sudden, you mayknow and your listeners may know,
ladies of a certain ageexperience an internal furnace periodically
(04:49):
that starts way down deep andjust radiates out.
It can be very miserable.
And all of a sudden I wasfeeling that furnace.
And.
Have you ever been in a cowsuit before, Kristen?
Not a cow suit, no.
Maybe other kinds of suits,but these are, they're so, so, so
hot.
Yeah.
(05:09):
So anyway, I thought, oh, oh,please, no, no, not in this get up,
not now, please, please, no.
But in that moment, itreminded me of some sorrow that I
had been experiencing and thatthat was this.
That my husband and I haddealt with infertility all our married
(05:30):
life, and we did.
We were able to have one.
One child, our daughter.
And we always wanted more,never felt led to adopt.
I don't know why.
We were not good candidatesfor other forms of conception.
And so I knew that with every.
Every furnace episode, I wasone step closer to the end of my
(05:56):
reproductive years.
And apparently the answer fromGod was no.
And everybody listening, I'msure, knows what it's like to want
something you don't have or toask God for something perfectly reasonable
(06:17):
and you get a no.
And it doesn't make sense.
And it seems like it's not fair.
Well, for about two yearsbefore that, I had started.
I had always been a deeplyjoyful person.
Person.
And I started getting sad.
And I couldn't figure out if Iwas still a joyful person going through
(06:38):
a season of sadness or if Iwas turning into a sad person.
And it just broke my own heart.
But it was in that moment thatthat lesson I learned so long ago
came back to me.
And all of a sudden, I knowthis thought was from God.
I thought to myself, isn'tthis the perfect picture of joy and
(07:02):
sorrow in the same place?
Me having a hot flash in a cow suit?
And I had to laugh because itwas so ridiculous, but it was exactly
what I needed.
And it changed the way Ilooked at tough times from then on.
That, oh, it's not just.
(07:23):
Just sad.
It's joy over here waiting foryou to be intentional enough to draw
from the joy that's walkingalongside that sadness.
Some lesson.
Yeah, absolutely.
Oh, my gosh.
Yeah.
That's amazing.
That in that moment, having ahot flash, that.
That, like you said, that thatstill came to you, right?
(07:45):
You had a.
That appreciation that, youknow, there is good and evil, there's
dark and light.
There's joy even in the hard things.
And, you know, that's aperspective that I think we can all
try to remember more becausewe're all going to have seasons.
We're all going to have thingsthat are hard.
We're going to have loss and grief.
(08:07):
You know, this year, I'vewalked through several losses.
My dad passed earlier thisyear after battling Parkinson's,
you know, and it had gotten.
It continued to get, you know,go downhill and get.
Just get really bad.
And then we had a neighborhoodfriend unexpectedly pass.
And then I had a girlfriend inJuly pass, actually just had her
(08:27):
celebration and Service on Friday.
And you know, but in all thosethings, and I know a lot of other
people walk through a lot ofloss, you know, recently and you
don't know how it'll hit you.
But in every one of thosetimes I found so much joy and love
and other things.
Even while you felt this deeploss in this grief.
(08:51):
And you know, one, maybe it'sbecause I'd had a lot of perspective
on that before from talking toother people, right.
That have walked through a lotof grief, unexpected grief.
But two, I think it's becauseof my perspective.
Right.
And that I knew that even whenmy dad was struggling before he passed
(09:11):
like the times that we wouldjust be over there, which was regularly
there was even so much.
He was just so happy to haveus and that we were there and that,
you know, because he knewfamilies that their kids weren't
present or that weren't there,that weren't helpful.
But, you know, so it's like Iwas always just have this appreciation
in this, like knowing thatthere's joy in the moments.
(09:34):
Even when it was horrible for him.
Right.
He couldn't do much ofanything for himself, but it was,
he still had such joy.
He was still so proud.
Right.
Of his children.
He had so much love and somuch faith.
And I think watching peoplelike that too sometimes reminds us
that there's joy to be had.
There's other people, a lot oftimes us who brings the joy into
(09:55):
our lives, but it's also beinglight hearted.
And you brought something elseup earlier, which is we need to not
take ourselves in life soseriously, you know?
You know, while that might notbe exactly what you say all the time,
it was clear that the plaquethat you went to apply for a chick
fil a cow job and that you puttogether this amazing, like probably
(10:16):
the most professional levelapplication they've gotten.
Right.
For the cow.
To me, it's just amazing andit just shows this light heartedness
that you put into.
Right.
You were already doing thingsand whatnot.
And you said, I'm going to gobe the chick fil a cow.
Because that seems kind of fun.
Right?
Right.
And I love that.
Highly underrated.
(10:37):
Sometimes, you know, we feellike we don't have enough time or
the wherewithal.
But really you.
You don't have time not tohave fun because it's, it's, it's
so true.
So I was at a women'sleadership event two weeks ago.
I was on a panel there.
And the woman that runs orhosts this, this group, she.
(10:58):
I GUESS she's about 75 and atthe beginning of the event, but.
Well, I'm sorry, before theevent started, so only a couple of
us were there.
It was at a local businessthat has a huge second floor, you
know, event area and they havea two story slide besides their steps
coming up or down.
And she had said somethingabout the slide and kind of said
(11:19):
what we're talking about,which is, oh, we should all just
like, you know, enjoy lifemore and do things right.
The whole, you know, I talkabout a lot like, follow your passions
and go and enjoy life.
Don't say no to life.
And so when I was leaving,there was a woman sitting at the
top of the slide.
And I said, okay, I'm gonna do it.
(11:40):
Like, I didn't even know anyof these women because it was a new
group that I haven't been apart of before.
But she was actually justtaking a picture.
So I say, okay, I'll do it.
So.
So some of the women are upthere and so she's like, oh, I'll
take your picture and video.
I said, okay, great.
So I start to go and the womendown below are yelling to me, put
your legs on this outer slide.
So I. I'm like, why?
(12:01):
So I start doing it.
As I get to the bottom, Ithink I better put my legs together
right to stop myself.
They were saying that becauseyou needed to slow down.
So I flew off of it runningand fly to a superman position onto
the ground.
And it kind of hit my arms.
And I was okay, of course,besides my pride.
But the point about that was,is one, you.
(12:24):
Yes.
I didn't know that I was goingto fall because I didn't know how
fast it was.
But it was uncomfortable forme to do that because I didn't know
anyone else.
I've never done this slide.
But I ignored the fear.
I ignored the like, oh, let'sjust go down the stairs normal.
And said, no, I want to spicethings up.
Even in that little moment,let's do the slide.
(12:45):
Because we can all be like,we're 10 years old again or 5 years
old.
And so I only share that tosay, go take the slide.
Go apply for the Chick Fil.
A, you know, thing.
Or, you know, my mom, she's always.
Whenever we go to a trade showor event, she wouldn't go be in the
costume.
But anytime there was acharacter like that, she would run
up and say, I want to take apicture with them.
(13:07):
And so for her that was, youknow, a fun thing.
And so that's the point isjust get out of your comfort zone.
Right.
Because that's often where youfind the joy and you find the little
nuggets that get you excited.
Right.
I always tell people thatthere are a couple kinds of fear
in my mind anyway.
One is fear of, like, jumpingout of an airplane.
(13:31):
Fear that I'm afraid of thisand I don't want to do it.
That would be me, do not wantto do it.
But there's the other kindthat I think that's worth paying
attention to, and that's I'mkind of scared of this, but I really
want to do it, and I say payattention to that.
Absolutely sly.
Yeah.
I so agree with you on that.
(13:51):
And yes, I'm with you.
I used to think when I wasvery young, oh, I'm going to jump
out of an airplane.
But I bungee jumped one time,and I was so petrified to jump.
And yes, it was fun after thefact, but I was like, that is not
for me.
Apparently.
It makes me feel like Ishouldn't be doing that.
Every bell and whistle wentoff in my body.
I said, apparently, I'm notmeant to skydive.
So since then, I said, it'snot for me.
(14:13):
So I'm with you on that.
That is a different type of fear.
And that's okay, right?
Because sometimes you do wantthat little voice to tell you, like,
this dark alley at night seems dangerous.
Right?
Versus.
Yeah, versus, like, oh, youknow what, what really is going to
happen if you decide to go inthe ocean swimming, but you haven't
been in it for 10 years, youknow, it's going to be joyful.
(14:34):
So I love that.
Okay, so let's get into.
Tell me a little bit aboutsome of the things that you share
about finding joy in oureveryday lives.
Oh, I, you know, I. I have collected.
And that's why I call myself acurator of joy shots.
Because I've collected so many things.
(14:55):
I could.
I could make your podcastvery, very long.
I'll tell you just a couple,though, of my favorites.
And one of them, I call it toSeize and Celebrate Moments.
Because we all have moments.
And what I mean by seize amoment is to just pay attention to
(15:18):
it.
And one way my husband and Ihave decided to do this is to take
a one line a day journal.
I don't know if you've everheard of those or not.
They're, I don't know, like,four by six.
They're not very big, butthey're thick.
And you can write there's justa little tiny space in every day.
(15:38):
You can write one word, oneline, anything.
And it goes on, though, forfive years.
You go through the book andthen you come back and put the next
year.
And so five years, we decidedthat we would like to go to bed and
let our heads hit the pillowwith something joyful on our minds.
So we decided at the end ofevery day to write one good thing
(16:02):
that happened that day, nomatter how bad the day had been.
Well, we started it in Januaryof 2020, so we all know what was
coming after that.
But, you know, of course we didn't.
And it turned out to be thebest thing.
And some terrible thingshappened to us in that I might be
(16:23):
able to tell you about alittle bit later, but in 2020.
But.
But I will say that now we'reon our sixth year, we had to start
a new journal.
Now we have hundreds andhundreds and hundreds of tiny moments
from every day.
And that's not to negate thebad things that might have happened
(16:45):
along the way.
It's not a band aid on agaping wound, but it's just a way
to change the channel in yourmind and use that book to do that.
And we have found that justwhat a delight.
So that's just one way to payattention then.
Celebrating moments.
(17:06):
Season Celebrate.
Celebrating moments.
My favorite ways to make amoment concrete.
So the journal makes it concrete.
Everybody's brought a souvenirhome from the beach, a shell or,
you know, bought somesouvenirs, brought them home.
But I encourage people tocollect everyday souvenirs.
(17:29):
So if you have coffee with afriend and you had an especially
good time, I might take thecup and put it in the windowsill
afterwards and just let it sitthere so that every time you see
it.
This is a paper cup.
Do not steal a ceramic cupfrom a coffee.
But you just get a little.
(17:50):
A little joy shot.
And it reminds you of thatwonderful time.
One time we went on a rafttrip and had a great time.
Our shoes were obnoxious andawful and gross at the end of the
trip.
So I put them on the front porch.
Muddy, nasty.
And every time I noticed that,waiting for them to dry, every time
(18:12):
I noticed that, I would openthe front door and I'd look to the
left and I'd see those shoes and.
And it would make me smile.
I left them there for two weeks.
They were ugly, but theyreminded me of some joy.
But my favorite way of makingthings concrete is to actually print
(18:33):
out a photo.
There are lots of things youcan do with photos.
But my favorite, if I can tellyou this story of all time, One year
at the my mom and I were atthe Virginia State Fair and we passed
by a booth where you could getyour picture taken with a chimpanzee
for a mere $5.
(18:54):
And I said, mom, mom, let'sget our picture taken.
Let's get our picture taken.
And she just kept refusing.
And keep in mind, I was agrown woman at this time.
I was not a child begging mymom for this.
But she just kept saying no.
And I said, why?
And she said, well, sosomebody might look at it 50 years
from now and think it's athree generation photo.
(19:16):
And I said, really?
And that was it.
That was the end of it.
We missed the opportunity.
However, 20 years later, myfamily was coming to Virginia from
Indiana.
I knew this would probably bethe last time all those people were
here.
I was lying in bed one night,they would be here for several days
(19:39):
thinking, what can I do toentertain these people?
And all of a sudden my mindwent back that 20 years to that missed
opportunity.
And I thought, I wonder if Ican find a photographable chimpanzee
anywhere and surprise my momor get revenge.
(19:59):
You can look at it one of two ways.
Sure enough, I networked around.
I found a guy with a farm inmy county.
I called him up, I said,here's what I'm doing.
He said, oh, yeah, why don't.
He said, it's cold.
It was December.
He said, it's cold.
We don't want your mom out inthe cold.
Why don't I bring the chimp toyour house?
(20:20):
And I wanted to die fromhappiness at that thought.
So on the appointed day, wehad a backdrop in our living room
because my mom thought we werejust going to take family photos.
And the handler was coming upthe walk with the chimp.
And I told my mom, I said,mom, put some lipstick on.
(20:41):
I got a surprise for you.
And when he walked through thedoor with that chimpanzee, I said,
do you remember 20 years ago?
Yes, yes, yes, she remember.
But she was all about it this time.
So for 90, I am so telling youthe truth.
90 of the most joyful momentsof our lives.
(21:06):
We played with that chimp.
She.
We would lie down on the floorand she would roll over us.
She would take grapes from our mouths.
She would jump all over.
It was so fun.
And we got about 300 picturesof all that.
But the greatest moment of theday was at the end, about the time
she had to leave.
And we sat down and my mom andI had a picture taken with the chimpanzee.
(21:32):
I have that picture on mydresser now.
And it reminds me not just ofthat moment, but every day, every
single day that I'm home, Ilook at it.
It reminds me of moments thatthe coming day might hold that I
(21:52):
don't want to miss.
And a little P.S.
to the story.
My mom lived to be 99 years old.
And when she died, my brotherand I were meeting with the funeral
director.
And he said, you know, we havea little.
Usually put a little pamphletabout the person and some information
(22:13):
just for people to take home.
He said, but we need a photo.
And my brother looked at meand he said, I have an idea, but
it might be inappropriate.
And I said, inappropriate isour middle name.
So we put a picture of my momand a chimpanzee on front.
(22:34):
On the front of that bulletinand we told the story at her service.
And everybody knows at afuneral there are tears and there
is grief, but.
But there was so much laughterbecause that story and it, again,
it's joy and sorrow rightthere, you've experienced lately
(22:56):
in the same place.
So making it concrete, such abig help.
I love that story.
And yeah, because for my dad,what he wanted was a celebration.
And so it was somewhat happy.
We shared stories, right?
And people, definitely one ofhis very close friends shared a mission
(23:17):
story.
But it was so many funny, youknow, like, it was just like so good.
It was so heartfelt, but itwas also funny and it was endearing
and so.
Absolutely.
I know what you're saying, butI love the story about your mom and
your chimpanzee.
My mom would have been the onethat would have been pulling me over.
I would have done it, but shewould have been like, please, please,
please.
(23:39):
Above my desk, I have somephotos of friends and family and
some things.
But one of the photos I haveup there is from when I was a child,
so I wasn't an adult yet, butit is me holding a baby.
I think it's a hold on a baby lion.
So it was way back, right?
Because you probably aren'tallowed to do these things now.
But you know, at a.
(24:00):
At a thing where you just gotake a picture, but I'm holding it,
there's nobody around us.
I'm just holding this real animal.
But it's like, I love thatpicture because, I don't know, it
just reminds me of.
I don't know, it's just, youknow, it's like you said, I love
looking at it, that's one ofthe reasons why it's the only picture
of me as a kid that's on thisparticular, you know, area.
And, but that one just makesme so happy seeing it all the time.
(24:24):
So I'm absolutely with you.
And I think that's the point too.
Even about your, your mom'sthe, you know, the funeral pamphlet
or information about her isthat we don't have to follow any
rules.
There are no rules, right?
I mean, somebody might, wemight feel like there's rules, but
(24:44):
there's not.
And we get to choose how welive and we get to choose our joy.
And if something seems happyor good to us or we connect with
it, or we love something, thenwe shouldn't be afraid to share it
or to show it or to go take apicture with a chimpanzee.
And so I definitely encouragepeople, you can do the same if we
just live a little bit morespontaneous, right?
(25:07):
And say, doesn't that look fun?
You know what I mean?
Or I love fresh flowers in thehouse, you know, but.
And if I don't have any in myyard, I'll go buy them for myself
for my house.
But some people I think,think, oh well, no one bought me
flowers.
You don't need permission, youdon't need to wait if they make you
happy.
Seeing beautiful, brightcolored flowers makes me really happy
as I walk in my kitchen or myoffice, you know, so it's like, do
(25:31):
those little things for yourself.
Love that.
Sometimes I will keep a crossreference list.
Other people have differentnames for it, but it'll be, it'll
be a list of things that bringme joy.
Like you said, like the flowers.
Like for a lot of people it'sbeing outdoors, just being outdoors,
(25:51):
just anything.
And if you keep a running listbecause you, you won't be able to
think of everything all atonce, but just a running list.
And then when life gets hard,or even on a everyday, superficial
level, if you have a task thatyou are just dreading.
I hate pain.
You know, if you can marrythat tough place with something that
(26:17):
gives you joy.
And a lot of times peopledon't remember to give themselves
those little pieces of joy.
I read and I wish I couldremember the name of the book.
I don't.
But this woman lost her best friend.
Her best friend died and shewas an outdoors woman all the way.
(26:38):
And it just breathed life into her.
And she said after her frienddied, she said, I went into the woods
because no other arms were big enough.
I thought that that does It.
So it's so simple.
It's such a simple thing to do.
Just keep a list and then golook at the list and, oh, yeah, I
(27:01):
need.
I need to get outside today.
Absolutely.
And, you know, there's a. I. Idon't know the quote.
It's.
It's a book I have in here somewhere.
I think it's a devotional, butI think it's Shanti, not Feldman,
but it's Feldhan Felden,something like that.
But she basically is talking about.
Her and her husband werehaving a really tough time.
I don't remember if he losthis job, but something had happened
in their life, right?
(27:22):
So they were struggling andtrying figure out what was next.
And financially, things aregoing to be hard, but they're driving
through the mountains, Ithink, in Colorado, and as they're
just, you know, feeling theweight of life, they turn the corner,
right?
They're in the mountains, andthey just see the majestic mountains,
right, Kind of with the light coming.
And they.
They had that feeling of awethat you get in big nature sometimes.
(27:44):
And, you know, she reminds youin that book or on that page that
you cannot feel fear or worryor even sadness in the same moment
that you have, that you feelawe or gratefulness, in other words.
So when we are grateful, whenwe are writing down or we're taking
note of something good thathappened in our day or something
(28:06):
at least, that we can beappreciative of, or if we are in
something where we see thisgorgeous sunset where there's purples
and oranges and, you know,pinks in the sky, and you just take
a minute to be present andreally be awestruck by it, all the
other feelings will go away inthat moment, right?
And if we let ourselvesexperience those things, some of
(28:27):
the hard things feel a littleless heavy, I think, you know, in
the scheme of things, right?
When.
When my daughter was little,four years old, maybe it was raining
one day, and she thought rainwas just the most amazing thing ever.
And I was.
And I was preoccupied withsomething else.
(28:51):
And she came up to me andsaid, mommy, let's put on our swimsuits
and go walking in the rain.
And I thought, oh, no, it'sraining so hard.
And we lived in a neighborhoodwhere there were no secrets because
nobody had a garage.
You went out on the sidewalk,and everybody knew.
I thought, oh, that just seemswrong on many levels.
(29:12):
But then I started to say no.
And then I said to her, tomyself, you know, she's four years
old once, and so we did it.
We put on our bathing suits.
She put on galoshes for someweird reason, and we went up and
down the street in the rainfor about 20 minutes.
And do you know, 40 yearslater, she remembers that 20 minutes,
(29:39):
is 44 years old now andremembers that 20 minutes.
So you can't underestimatepulling into that joy.
Well, and I think you broughtup a good point, which is I have
three sons.
They're all about college ageor just, just beyond.
And absolutely, you know, I'vewritten about this before, that it's
(30:02):
so easy to stand on thesidelines of a parent sometimes and
be the cross carpal parent orthe, you know, that we have to do
dinner.
You know, we have all thesethings to do so we can say no to
the playfulness of, of beingwith our children in the play, in
the wonder.
And we have to be careful ofthat to, to not continue to say no.
(30:24):
I was on a plane, I don'tknow, a couple years ago, and there
was a boy and a mom, I think,in behind me.
And the boy, I don't know howold he is.
I'm going to say he was 8 or 9years old, but he, he was playing
something, you know, on alittle device, so probably like a
Game Boy or something.
And he kept trying, he was soexcited about something.
He kept trying to tell hismom, but she was just kind of like
not going to have it, notgoing to, you know.
(30:44):
But from having sons that wereprobably just at the time a little
bit older than that, I, like,I knew not to say, I never said probably
no to something, but I hadlearned the lesson that sometimes
I would sit at the beach andnot go in the water with them.
And I learned, you know, whenit was a snow day here, which for
where we're from, right, wedon't get snow all the time.
Like go.
I would go sledding with themand I would, you know, go out and
(31:07):
trance around in the snow.
Actually, now I do it, whereasmy boys are too old for that.
If you will go meet mygirlfriend, then we go on a, A little
adventure in the snow.
But my point is, is we have toremember that our choices and our
saying yes give other peopleboth permission to say yes to the
joy, to the fun, to thewonder, and, and it teaches our kids
(31:31):
or other people, right, ifyou're a teacher or something, it
teaches them that they'reimportant and that play and wonder
and joy are important andthey're worth making time for.
So I think that's really valuable.
Actually, yeah, yeah, good point.
I love it.
So let me ask you this.
You know, I know obviouslyyour new devote or you know, your
(31:51):
newest book is a devotional,talking about how we can still tap
into the joy you've shared alittle bit about, you know, some
of the ways that you try to dothat now.
But what about when you'vewalked through some of the tough
times?
Were there additional thingsthat helped you continue to pull
those little bits of joy outor into your day?
(32:12):
There was one, one inparticular that I. I try to look
for God in the middle of a bigbad story.
People ask me often, whatabout the times when something happens
and there is no, none, no joyin this circumstance.
(32:38):
And there's plenty of that.
I think we all know that.
And that happened to us.
My father in law at 91 yearsold got Covid.
It was April of 2020.
He had been in assisted livingand we couldn't see him for three
weeks.
And then he had to go to thehospital once he was diagnosed.
(33:01):
My husband, we were both veryclose to him, but my husband extremely
close to his father and justbroke our hearts to be separated
from him like that.
So he was in the hospital andeverybody was holed up at home and
we were just sick with worry.
But there was a nurse and hername was Karen.
(33:26):
And she called us on herpersonal phone and said, I just want
you to know.
And she was dressed at thetime in a.
Something that looked like ahazmat suit.
You know, in the verybeginning nobody could touch anybody,
but she would continually withher gloved hand stroke his forehead
(33:49):
and say what a sweet man he was.
And she said, I hope it's okay.
I found a computer and Ibrought it in and I started to play
old hymns on the computer.
She didn't know that helistened to hymns on the radio ever
since his wife had died yearsbefore to put himself to sleep and
to soothe himself.
(34:10):
And so that was wonderful.
Well, it didn't take break,but a couple days before she called
us and said, you might want tospeak to your dad.
And so we were talking to himand he said he was having trouble
breathing and he choked outthe words, I'm ready to go.
(34:32):
And of course we were notready to let him.
Yeah, but he was very clearheaded and, and he was ready.
So we said, okay, stop.
Stop everything if that's whatyou want.
Nurse Karen held her personal phone.
I can't even tell you how longit was.
(34:53):
I cannot.
He slipped into unconsciousness.
She still held the phone andHeld it and held it until we watched
his breaths.
And at one point when hischest failed to rise and said, I
think he's gone.
And she checked and she noddedher head and she cried.
(35:19):
Yeah.
With us.
And I've always said it wasthe most beautiful, terrible thing
I have ever experienced in my life.
To think on one hand that wecouldn't be with him.
I know that time.
(35:39):
But on the other hand, that welived in an age where technology
allowed us to be with him andat least to be there in one form
or another and usher into thearms of God was just amazing.
And I said that, lady, thatcircumstance was awful.
(36:05):
Yes.
Looking for redemption in abig bad story is.
Wow, that's so important.
Yeah.
Oh, first of all, I'm sorry Ihad to go through that and I know
a lot of people did.
Actually one of my uncles, hedoesn't live near me, but it's similar.
Sadly, a similar storyhappened to him and similar outcome.
(36:29):
You know, he was in thehospital as well, and his kids couldn't
go see him and everythingduring COVID and he also passed in
the hospital.
But sadly, we all probablyknow a lot of people that had that
terrible experience.
But the fact, like you said,that you had, and I know there were
so many caring nurses andpeople and that showed grace and
(36:50):
love and just a level ofcompassion that they were there with,
with some of our loved ones.
And, you know, not everybodygot that or not.
The circumstances weren't all that.
And so thank you for sharingthat because you're right.
Even in the terrible situationthat so many of us found ourselves
(37:11):
in during early Covidespecially, and not knowing and just
the roles of the hospital andthe care facilities, it seemed inhumane,
but we didn't get to choosethese things.
Right.
And so the fact that you hadsomeone that came alongside your
father in law and, you know,you all could still be talk to him
(37:31):
and be a part of it, eventhough it wasn't what you wanted.
Of course, that's.
That's beautiful.
And like you said, it doesn'tmake it seem joyful, but what it
does is it gives us a sense ofappreciation or seeing some moment
of good or of someone's loveor outreach, even when we're going
(37:51):
through something really hard.
Right.
Like, same with my dad, whenhe was really ill, he had hospice
coming.
And for my stepmom,especially, having those people come,
the different people thatcame, was a godsend for her because
it was support.
Not just like maybe to helphim shower, but it was support for
her to talk like, do you havewhat you need?
(38:13):
You know, let me.
You know, so it.
All of those things.
I mean, the situation wasn'tgreat, but none of us could fix that.
But there was people that camealongside her.
We all came alongside her.
Right.
And so she felt as supportedas she could, and we did going through
a really hard diagnosis andthen going into, you know, the final
stages of life.
And so, once again, we couldchoose to only look at the tough
(38:37):
and difficult.
But if we are willing to look,we can find the beautiful moments,
the moments of connection andthe moments of people coming, you
know, being.
Being there for us.
And so I think that's where wefind the grace and the moments, whether
you want to call that joy ornot, but it's.
It's joyful because it's theopposite in those moments of the
(39:00):
hard and the sad things, Ithink, you know, and.
You know, I define joy as deep delight.
Yes.
Easier soul.
And with a definition likethat, you.
You can.
At least I can understand howyou could even call that joy.
(39:22):
It was.
We took such delight in thislady, and it really did feed our
souls, even though we were.
Absolutely.
I agree with you.
Okay, so let me ask you this.
We've kind of talked a littlebit about just, you know, having
a playfulness about our lives,about, you know, tapping into, you
(39:45):
know, just the other things,wonder, saying yes to things that
will delight us.
But is there anything else youjust share with us about, you know,
you've already shown that youobviously move towards those things,
that you invite them into your life.
But anything else you justwant to.
Share about that, I will tellyou one thing, one more thing that
(40:06):
really helps me, and I thinkit helps a lot of people if you're
feeling particularly unjoyfuland that to do something for someone
else.
And that is not new news, butI need to be reminded of it periodically.
You know, one Halloween, Ihave a friend, and we both love to
(40:30):
dress up, and nobody wasinviting us to their Halloween parties.
And we were ruing the factthat, you know, adults, oh, while,
you know, they just stand inthe street while the kids have all
the fun and this and that.
So we decided that we woulddress up and we would do what we
called a reverse trick ortreat, because two adults ringing
(40:52):
a doorbell and holding apillowcase out would not go over
well.
But we decided that we wouldgive treats away.
So we dressed up, we got it,made ourselves a list of people that
we knew who had had a roughtime, who were having a rough time
or had had a rough year and wewent all dressed up and gave out
(41:13):
candy.
So simple.
So, so simple.
But let me tell you, it's justjoy shot after joy shot after joy
shot, whatever.
And both of us over the yearshave gone through some, some really
tough things and we've beendoing that maybe eight years now.
(41:34):
Yeah.
So we said we'll, we'll be,you know, 98 year old ladies hobbling
inflammation to people's doors.
I love it.
I love that.
Yeah.
And even during COVID Iremember, you know, when some of
my girlfriends, they had theirbirthdays and you know, at the very
beginning.
(41:54):
Right.
Of most people weren't havingbig celebrations or gathering because
nobody knew and all the things.
But you know, I remember likewe would, we did like little special
things for the people thatmissed their birthdays.
You know what I mean?
Maybe we couldn't all betogether in the house, you know,
at the beginning at least, orwhatever, but we would go do like
you said, little things tobring them joy, you know, maybe do
(42:15):
stuff in their yard or bring,you know, ring their doorbell and
bring them something and leaveit on the porch or, you know.
But your point is we can alltap into that spirit of giving, that
spirit of extending out like alittle surprise and love.
Whether it's bringing aneighbor that you want to, you know,
brighten their day a littlepotted plant or some basil from your
(42:38):
garden.
Right.
Or doing something fun like on Halloween.
You know, the kids don't getto only have the fun.
Right.
We should too.
So I love, I love thatpractice and example.
That's amazing.
So let me ask you this.
What would you say is fillingyou up and fueling you right now
as we're, you know, in the notquite to the middle of September?
(42:59):
A couple things I'd have tosay right now.
I've been speaking for a longtime, but I'm really putting an emphasis
on it now.
And I've started speakingoutside the church walls to educators
on their professionaldevelopment days because they, at
(43:20):
least the educators in my areacomplain about professional development
days and how they're forced tosit through things they're not interested
in.
Teachers have had it tough.
They're near and dear to my heart.
That has been.
I've spoken to counselors to.
Just filling me up.
Absolutely.
And I'm also getting moreinvolved, kind of related to speaking
(43:44):
and storytelling.
So I'm going to a conferencein Nashville in October.
But I'm also going to takeimprov lessons in January.
So fun.
And also disco balls.
In particular.
And confetti.
I went into an ice cream shop,I don't know, a month ago, I went
(44:07):
into the bathroom, and all ofa sudden, the disco ball, the light
goes off in the bathroom anddisco ball comes and it's shining
around.
So I put a disco ball in mykitchen, and I also have one that
fits on your phone, so you can.
You can, you know, at a stop.
(44:30):
Oh, my gosh, that's awesome.
Yeah.
And I'm with you.
I love confetti and all thebeautiful, happy things, you know,
because, you know, we don'tneed to wait for a birthday or a
celebration day to celebrate.
You know, as you kind ofalluded to earlier, every day is
actually a reason tocelebrate, you know, and the, you
know, we.
If we still get to wake up andhave a breath, you know, and live
(44:51):
this day, that is a reason tobe joyful and to, you know, embrace
the day.
And like you said, we don'tneed to fit in some mold or be, you
know, serious and stodgy.
We can be fun and fun lovingas we get older and not say, either
of us are old.
I just meant, you know, we'renot 15.
(45:11):
Yeah.
My mom's in her 80s.
She's a professional artist,and she's all about, like I've kind
of mentioned earlier, she'sall about the fun and the colors
and painting and drawing.
Right.
So, absolutely.
I get that from her, you know,much like, you know, you probably
had some of that growing up aswell, but.
Okay, so tell us, Jill, wherecan people find out about your newest
(45:33):
book and your podcast andeverything else you're speaking and
all that good stuff?
Mainly if you just go to mywebsite, jillbond.com that it's all
there, the book.
And you can find the bookanywhere that you most.
Anywhere that you would buy books.
So Amazon, Christian Book,Barnes and Noble, all those places.
(45:56):
So.
So it's really easy to find,but my website will take you to the
podcast and to the book and toeverything else.
Absolutely.
I love it.
Well, thank you for taking thetime to come on and join us to share
your stories of, you know,finding joy in everyday moments.
Just sharing with us.
How can we tap into more funand just more real.
(46:21):
Just like real moments in life.
Right.
Things that are going to lightus up.
Because I think when we're allmore lit up, we are just a testament
to life, to how good it canbe, even though there's going to
be.
Hard and difficult things.
And so just thank you fortaking the time and joining us today.
My extreme pleasure.
Really fun.
If you enjoyed today'sepisode, if you could leave a rating
(46:43):
review on Apple Podcasts orwherever you listen to podcasts,
it helps the show getdiscovered by more people so that
we can continue to uplift andencourage people in their faith journey
as well as all of the otherparts of their lives.
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