In this episode of "Not Your Typical Leadership Coaching Podcast," we dive deep with Dr. Robert Glover, the renowned author of "No More Mr. Nice Guy." Dr. Glover shares
• His transformative journey from a marriage and family therapist
• Grappling with his own Nice Guy Syndrome
• Becoming an influential author and coach who empowers men to lead authentic lives
Join us as we explore how Dr. Glover's insights have evolved over two decades, the impact of his work on men's growth, and his ideas on true leadership in a world that often rewards fitting in.
Covert Contracts:
1. If I'm a good guy, I'll be liked. And, of course, I got the scoreboard up. I'm a good guy. I do all these good things. People should like me and love me.
2. If I meet your needs without you having to ask, if I read your mind and meet your needs without you having to ask, you will read my mind and meet my needs without me having to ask.
3. If I do everything right, I will have a smooth and easy life.
‣ First Order Change: “If I do A, as part of that covert contract even, if I do A, then, B should happen.”
‣ Second Order Change: “A systemic change where you fundamentally alter the system. And maybe you cut a flower off. Maybe you shorten a string, maybe move a string up on the stick a little bit, perturbate it, you have no clue where it's gonna end up.”
Key Points:
• The Genesis of "No More Mr. Nice Guy":
○ Dr. Glover shares the personal and professional experiences that led him to write his seminal book.
○ Insights into the challenges men face with the Nice Guy Syndrome in their personal and professional lives.
• The Evolution of a Movement:
○ The unexpected journey of "No More Mr. Nice Guy" from concept to global phenomenon.
○ Dr. Glover discusses the initial challenges in publishing and how the digital age revolutionized access to his work.
• Impacts and Insights:
○ Reflections on the reception of "No More Mr. Nice Guy" and its growing relevance in men's coaching and therapy.
○ The pivotal role of authenticity and vulnerability in overcoming the Nice Guy Syndrome and embracing effective leadership.
• Leadership and Authenticity:
○ Dr. Glover's perspective on the intersection of authentic self-expression and leadership.
○ The importance of breaking free from covert contracts and embracing transparent communication for leaders.
• Looking Forward:
○ Dr. Glover talks about his recent endeavors, including his membership program, Integration Nation (integrationnation.net), aimed at supporting men in their journey toward authenticity and leadership.
○ Future projects and Dr. Glover's vision for expanding his impact on men's development.
Links and References:
1. No More Mr. Nice Guy by Dr. Robert Glover, www.drglover.com/no-more-mr-nice-guy/the-book.html
2. Dr. Robert Glover’s website: www.drglover.com
3. Learn more about IFS Coaching with Bill Tierney at www.billtierneycoaching.com.
4. Learn more about coaching with Martin Kettelhut at www.listeningisthekey.com.
5. Learn more about IFS at www.IFS-institute.com.
Popular Podcasts
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations.
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
The Nikki Glaser Podcast
Every week comedian and infamous roaster Nikki Glaser provides a fun, fast-paced, and brutally honest look into current pop-culture and her own personal life.