July 18, 2025 • 29 mins
Navigating Transformation
In this episode of Real Men Feel, host Andy Grant converses with Ritchie Nkana, an award-winning author, former banker, and transformation coach. Richie shares his journey from a successful banking career to becoming a transformation coach, driven by a need for personal growth and change. The discussion explores the motivations behind change, common blind spots and misconceptions among high-achieving men, and the relationship between physical fitness and professional success.
Ritchie emphasizes the importance of daily discipline, mental health awareness, and the power of asking for help. The episode also highlights Ritchie's unique insights into integrating personal well-being with professional success, offering actionable advice for men striving to lead lives of authenticity, purpose, and power.
00:00 Introduction: The Illusion of Success
00:20 Welcome to Real Men Feel
00:34 Meet Ritchie Nkana: From Banker to Transformation Coach
01:17 The Turning Point: Desperation to Transformation
03:41 From Personal Struggles to Helping Others
04:59 Challenges of Shifting Identities
06:39 The Body and Bank Connection
09:45 Misconceptions and Blind Spots in High Achievers
13:15 Redefining Masculinity and Mental Health
15:35 The Importance of Openness and Vulnerability
18:27 Measuring Success and Personal Growth
21:53 Daily Habits and Rituals for Success
26:33 Final Thoughts and Contact Information
Connect with Ritchie
Ritchie Nkana -- https://ritchienkana.com/
LinkedIn -- https://www.linkedin.com/in/ritchienkana/
Resources
The Body and Bank Connection: How to Exercise Your Way to Financial Fitness, by Ritchie Nkana -- https://amzn.to/46epYIZ
As A Man Thinketh, by James Allen -- https://amzn.to/4kQjZ0H
Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway, by Susan Jeffers -- https://amzn.to/3TNtR04
Connect with Andy and the Real Men Feel Podcast:
Get support, growth, and brotherhood in the Authentic AF community. Join at http://realmenfeel.org/group
Instagram | @realmenfeelshow & @theandygrant
Andy Grant | https://theandygrant.com for coaching, healing, and book info!
Real Men Feel | http://realmenfeel.org
YouTube | https://youtube.com/realmenfeel
#RealMenFeel ep 362
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
On paper, I look successful, successful banker as you would
call it, bigger goes. But guess what, in the back end,
pretty much living in caffeine, we like she ships on autopilot,
pretty much being reactive, sortof like it's all about the
dopamine and the kind of stuff. Hello and welcome to Real Man
(00:21):
Field, where we explore the evolving pace of masculinity and
help men lead lives of authenticity, purpose, and
power. I'm your host, Andy Grant, and
today I'm joined by a man who knows what it takes to win, not
just in business, but in life. Richie and Connor is an
award-winning author, a former banker, and current
transformation coach who helps high achievers unlock new levels
of growth, fitness, and personalmastery.
(00:44):
From navigating major life transitions to cultivating daily
discipline, Richie is all about building the habits and mindset
that fuels true success. Whether you're on the verge of
burnout or craving A deeper sense of purpose, you're going
to find value in this one. Richie shares the two
motivations of change, the blindspots he sees and successful
men, and explores the body and bank connection.
(01:06):
Let's do it. Hello Richie, and welcome to
Real Men Field. Thanks, Andy.
Thanks for having me. So I know you've gone from being
a a successful banker to a transformation coach.
So first, what first are you interested in banking and then
what triggered the the shift? That's a very interesting
question. I think with banking, I think
that was easy. I think it was the money.
(01:28):
Yeah, I was. I'm a trade CPA.
So I think money I think was an easy motivation at that moment
in time, being a young kid and not really sure exactly what you
want to do, money is always a good motivation.
But I think change happens two ways with the shift from banking
into into transformation. What I've found to say, they say
(01:48):
change happened two ways. It could be through inspiration
or desperation. For me, that shift was more
around desperation. So by that I'm looking myself in
the mirror. I don't like what I see and what
I'm talking about. No liking what I see.
I'm not talking about the aesthetics.
Yes, that too, because I have put on quite a few pans over the
(02:09):
months and I think over years, Ithink with a neglect, I think
with busy with the workouts actually doing, but not like the
way I did show up when I looked in the mirror because I did not
like the way I showed up for my family.
I said, you know, like the way Ishowed up for my friends and
loved ones and and I did not like the way I showed off my
employers. And to tell you the truth, Andy,
(02:31):
I was actually scared and depressed that moment in time
because I got health conditions.I wanted my family at that rate
that I was going things are not looking good.
So it was time for me to make a shift and for me to do that.
Being desperate is going back todrawing board, seeking help and
(02:51):
but this the help that I was actually getting the solution
that was out there was just no right for me.
Being busy with my career in banking and and everything going
on. He had a very short window in
the day and with the PTS of personal trainers that I reached
out to at that time, I need to work around the time which was
(03:12):
just no right for me. So I had to work something out.
So I looked up everything from both nutrition, PT, metabolic
conditioning, but I found that stuff so interesting.
I went deep into the end up getting certified and all that
stuff. And that's what came out.
That solution, the same solutionthat has helped me being able to
(03:35):
not only maintain myself and gethealthier, but also help
hundreds of other people along the way through that.
It was never really meant for meto be a coach.
It was my mess which came into pretty much into into my
message. And through that, people
noticing how I was actually shifting and asking me for help
(03:57):
to actually help him how to do that.
So he was very, very organic in how it all sort of like turned
out. Yeah.
So it so it sounds like your personal growth really mirrors
what you now do with clients. Absolutely.
So everything pretty much I teach has been more about my my
pain points, some stuff I've travelled with being a busy, a
(04:17):
busy professional source to speak from a banking days and
how I can actually maintain health and how the energy what
you lacked and is filling those gaps that now I can actually
articulate that and actually teach that, but it can actually
relate to that. So it could be it could be
anything related to that. For the most part, these are
kind of be burned out, you know,in a case of like mental health
(04:40):
kind of struggles you kind of face as you go through these
kind of phases. So I can actually relate to what
professionals are actually goingthrough and being able to sort
of like bridge that gap as you indicated.
So pretty much my message turning into and into my mess,
my mess turning to my message. So Richie, I wonder how
(05:01):
challenging or easy was it for your identity shift from from
corporate banker to entrepreneurand coach?
To be honest, it wasn't easy. It wasn't easy.
It's something that I've, I've really, I've invested quite a
lot of money and that for me to make that shift.
Having said that, because what I've found is being in a career,
(05:24):
being in a job, it was everything became so easy for
me. I was good at what I did saying
banking in the case, lead transformation programs.
But when I came into the coaching space, it was very,
very different. And being entrepreneur, right, I
had to learn everything about marketing.
I never had to do much marketingin my consulting or on a case of
(05:48):
like kind of work career. Whereas you come in being
entrepreneur, you have to learn all that kind of stuff because
you can have the best part on the marketplace.
If nobody knows about it, nobody's going to buy.
So it's like learning all those new skills and it takes
persistence as well in a case oflike going into the marketplace
(06:09):
and being able to tickle your message, your message as well.
What problem are you actually solving?
How can people actually relate to the problem you're solving?
So you can actually bridge that gap.
So, so it wasn't, it wasn't easy, but I guess I think what
keeps you going is if you are clear on the purpose and that
grind, when that promise is actually very clear as to what
(06:32):
you're looking to achieve, that grind I think is easy.
You can just keep on going. When you first reached out, you,
you, you have this, this niche that that.
I had not heard him phrase this way before, But what?
What is the body and bank connection?
All right, that's quite interesting.
I think that's my, it's based onmy book actually, Body and Bank
(06:52):
Connection. I think this is goes back to the
struggle I had because I'll tellyou a story how it all came
about. I was talking to my fellow
bankers. I was giving a talk and I think
one of the questions I raised iswhat are your thoughts when we
talk about fitness? And for the most part the
answers I normally get, and I did get the end was like 6 pack.
(07:14):
You know, at times you might getan old answer like confidence
and stuff like that, which is quite interesting, right?
And I go like, oh Richie, I do understand the benefits of
exercise and fitness, but I justdon't have the time I need to
put food on the table, right? Which was quite interesting.
I was like, that is very, very interesting because actually
counter intuitive, right? Me having been in that
(07:37):
environment, because guess what?Studies have shown that when you
exercise, they're 20% more productive, right?
Studies have actually shown whenyou exercise, when you're in
that environment, because I was speaking to ban because my
fellow ban, because at that moment in time you are in that
very stressed environment. It's very stressful.
So when you're stressed, guess what?
(07:59):
The coastal levels elevated and what do you need to count to
that? You need things like serotonin,
dopamine to count to that. And guess what, when you
exercise, those are sort of likethe benefits you get in case of
like the happy homeowners, they're related that they're
referred to. We can talk about the cognitive
function. When you are in that demanding
job, you need to be cognitively sharp.
(08:22):
And what's so interesting is there's a study on BDNFBDNF
drives neurogenesis, which is a reproduction of brain cells.
And what was found is that when you exercise, BDNF can be
enhanced as much as threefold 3 times.
So I was speaking to my Bank of friends.
I was like, now with all these facts I just laid down, there's
more to it, but just these 3 facts.
(08:45):
Are you still saying that exercise and fitness is an
option or a necessity? Because I'm going to think about
Richie now. I think it is a necessity.
But so that was pretty much a genesis of my book and getting
to articulate that message. The body and bank connection,
yes, body and bank connection could be in a literal sense as
(09:07):
how you can level up your bank account, right?
Because guess what, we get paid for the value brings to the
marketplace. And as I talked about how you
can be more productive when you exercise, guess what that is
likely going to drive your productivity then that would
drive your bank account. So it could be in a literal
sense, but it could also be a metaphor.
(09:29):
Whatever bank account you're looking to feel, be it your
energy bank account, your productivity bank account, it
starts with what our bodies, andthat is pretty much what that
is. Yeah, that's how it came about.
So yeah, that's my my book Body and Bank Connection.
What are some common misconceptions in in the high
achieving men that you might work with?
Misconceptions about personal development or growth.
(09:52):
Yeah, I, I I think, I think there could be plenty of in the
case of misconception, I think girls, the re exist
misconception that in the case of like girls, maybe it's almost
like a one off, but I think it'ssupposed to be a constant.
I feel like in my case, I'm growing on a daily basis.
I call it playing back the tapeson a daily.
(10:14):
What is it that I could do better today looking at today?
What can I invest into tomorrow?I look at the key pieces that I
learned from today that a positive that I can invest into
tomorrow. What are the things that I can
actually sort of like eliminate.So yeah, so I think with girls,
it's not a one off. We have to keep on going.
(10:36):
The moment you stop growing is the moment you start dying.
So I think that is for me, I think that is maybe I would say
maybe one of them. What are some of the common
blind spots for someone that hasall the outward signs of success
in their life? I think I can, I can tell from
my own experience with that because you have a problem.
(10:58):
I could on paper I look successful, successful banker as
you would call it, bigger goes. But guess what, in the back end,
pretty much living in caffeine, be like she ships an autopilot,
you know, things like that, pretty much being reactive sort
(11:18):
of like it's all about the dopamine and the kind of stuff.
So it is very, very important tothink in the case of having that
identity shift and having that alignment, how is it that that's
what we're going to talk a lot about the operator behind say,
the business or behind whatever it is that we might see from the
outside, which could be a facade, right?
(11:41):
How is it that we can align the underlying operator because in
everything else sort of like then aligns with everything
else. Everything else can just be like
lovers. So I think it's all about how is
it that we show up and how we show up can it's all about, I
think for me, I look at it more about those all three areas,
(12:05):
right? In the case of our health, if
we're not really healthy and we don't feel right in our body, in
our energy because what energy drives execution, we can talk
about having systems that drive scale, right?
So in case of like business, in case of my located maybe from
the wealth perspective, but alsorelationship relationships
(12:27):
pretty much through everything, right.
So it's all about how is it realigned in all those kind of
three areas. And for me you think that is
success that we can relate to the people that actually lift
this up. It's not so much about being in
the room is when we leave the room.
What is it that lingers after weleave that room in the case of
(12:48):
relationships, in the case of health and energy levels, how is
it that we'll wake up where we to go, we know crashing at 2:00
PM, right? Do we have systems in place that
actually drive scale that we just know static we're hitting
that plateau. So I think those are kind of key
areas of thing for me that drivethat can have that full spectrum
(13:10):
success, be it in business and in life.
Richard, when we first spoke you, you talked about the
banking world being a very machismo tough guy place, which
surprised me as a non banker. That is not, that was not my
stereotypical view of of accountants.
So I wonder, how has your view and definition of masculinity
(13:33):
changed throughout your various careers?
Yeah, that's a very, very good point because I think we were,
I, I was going through burnout, I faced it big time.
And I think these are kind of things we don't talk about too
much. And I think as a man as well and
I keep things like even mental health, we don't talk enough
about it. We are meant to just tough it
out and grit and just keep on going, right.
(13:56):
But what to what expense? So yeah, for my banking world,
in my case, my experience was that that, you know, you just
meant in the case of show up, yes, in the case of long hours
that comes with the territory, but it's also just about being
that machismo as you mentioned in the case of toughing it out,
if you show your emotions, you are supposed to be maybe weak or
(14:21):
anything of that perceived as such, which is just think a sad
situation. But I think things are so
changing a little bit right now.So, but that education and
that's the reason I think in my case, I've been driving that
messaging quite a bit that in the case of burnout is not a
badge of honor, right? We can't be just as effective
and push things in scale withoutburning out, without sacrifice.
(14:44):
And that's been my mission because I did drive putting in
place systems, driving billions in the back end, but you find
the operators driving those systems themselves, they're not
really operating at scale. So that has been my mission and
that was been because I was partof that world.
(15:06):
So yes, it's it's very prevalentand it's about begin just being
again that awareness as well, because when you are in that
culture, you don't because that's all you know, that's what
you see. So it becomes ingrained and
becomes the normal, but it had doesn't have to be that.
Beyond burnout and mental health, is there anything else
(15:31):
you're seeing men struggle with today that they're keeping to
themselves? Yeah, I think it's, it's, it's
your openness. I think, man, I think it's
something that we're we're we'resupposed to be more about just
tough it out. It's just maybe not just the
banking world, but for the most part, I think with man, we're
(15:51):
supposed to tough it out. We're not supposed to open up
when we're struggling, but then we end up just bustling up and
the moment we just have that outlet, we just sort of like
almost like burst because we've just been building up for two
months for too long. So how is it that we can be able
(16:12):
to have create open spaces that we can actually your tickler and
communicate? So we appreciate your show,
Andy, because this is kind of stuff that man don't really talk
about openly. I'm struggling.
You know, I'm facing this, right?
You admitting that or me admitting that I have a problem
(16:32):
or I'm struggling with this doesnot feel weakness.
I think if anything, it shows strength being able to.
Yeah, being able to be open about it.
And only till you admit that I'mstruggling or had a problem
would you be able to get that help.
Because you cannot help somebodythat doesn't need, doesn't want
(16:54):
to be helped. Yeah, and men are, well, I'll
speak for myself. I've always been great at
pretending I don't need anybody's help when that's the
thing I need the most. And yeah, I have to get over my
own freaking bullshit of. And really that, that, that.
Perhaps it is that in green distortion of masculinity that
says I've got to figure it out myself, I've got to tough it up.
But yeah, often the bravest thing we can ever do is ask for
(17:18):
help. Absolutely.
I can totally relate because I've been in that boat myself
and I think that's the reason I think I'm trying to create as
much as possible like Operators Edge is part of that as well.
In the case of trying to create that open space where you can,
people can actually communicate,you can open.
This is a safe space, right? No judgement.
How is it that we can create more spaces like this?
(17:39):
Like what are you creating here,Andy, talking about things like
this? Because then when we open up,
man, go like, oh, actually I'm facing.
I'm also having going through that.
But I thought I was the only one.
And if I open up, I'll be seen as weak.
No, it's not weak. Yeah, that's why being willing
to be vulnerable, being willing to share whatever you're going
(18:01):
through it, it not only helps you, it helps everybody else
because it gives other people that hear that permission to go,
oh, I don't have to just keep this to myself.
Like that guy just spilled his guts and the world in mend.
That's that's amazing. That's not what I thought would
happen. Totally.
And it just a release as well. We just talked about both laying
up right that release and the times speaking and talking about
(18:24):
something, it just brings about that clarity as well.
Richard, what, How do you measure success in your work
with clients? Is it just the scale or how much
they bench press? Like what, how?
How do you know someone is succeeding?
I think success for me it's, it's very personal.
So each of one of my clients have got their own goals for me.
(18:44):
Think that one of the best definitions I have for success
is it's almost like a personal progressive realization of 1's
own purpose. So it has to be progressive, it
has to be a worthy as well. Maybe I should add there, right?
Personal progressive realizationof a worthy purpose, right?
(19:05):
So, and that is again, it's veryit's, it's, it's very personal.
So one of my clients come around, this is what I want to
achieve, right? Success for them will look very,
very different. I the same.
It has been like even when I wascoaching on the finance side of
things as well on personal finances, like I've got some
clients who will say like, oh, Richie, this is my financial
(19:26):
independence number. I want the other one would go
like, this is my personal finance number.
I want if I can actually have this money coming in on
autopilot without me lifting a finger, I'm financially
independent. So it's very, very, it's very,
very unique to each and every one of us.
So to your question, success is measured by how is it I can
(19:50):
bridge that gap that a client has come to me and they're
telling me this is my purpose, this is my goal.
This is where I want to hit. And I help them bridge that gap
because I've always shown because.
What do coaches do? I've always, because the time is
always this thing about the caseof like, what do a coach do?
A coach does is pretty much shorten the distance, shorten
(20:12):
that time frame. I looked at it more like, we're
all given these keys in this world, right?
We have this bunch of keys, but trying to find that right key
that's going to open the door tothose New Horizons can be quite
fidgety, might take a little bitof a while.
Sometimes what a coach does is point you to the right key so
(20:34):
you can open that door and get there quicker, so you can
actually go to those New Horizons.
So how is it that I can actuallyhelp them, point them to that
right key and get there quick enough and achieve what it is
that you're trying to achieve? That is success to me.
Excellent. Yeah, I like that metaphor.
I 'cause I, I have been and I see lots of people that kind of
(20:55):
just click keys. I just giant key chains, all
these keys of all these classicsand programs I've ever taken.
And then I don't really know which one to use when I'm faced
with a, with a challenge, though, I, I that, that, that
really, that really resonates with me.
Richie, is there a book that hastruly changed your life?
Wow. Yes, it's actually plenty, but
if I can pick one and this is aneasy read As a Man Thinketh by
(21:19):
James Allen. I've read that book quite a few
times. It's it's, it's a classic.
It's over 100 years old, but it it, it's just amazing in the
case of thought process and, andhow thought does drive our
actions in a lot of ways. And this just goes back to a lot
of things that we talked about, be it mental health and all that
(21:39):
kind of stuff. It's our thoughts, right?
How is it that we can direct those thoughts to the right
purpose? Yeah.
So, yeah, as a man, think it is one of my most, most favorite
books and I read it. I've read it so many times.
You know, I in my life I've found the importance of of
rituals and and and solid habitsto to to create my best life.
(22:02):
What is one thing that you do every day, no matter what?
Wow, 1st every day, no matter what, when I wake up, first
thing is water as they have at least a half a liter of water
just to keep stab my metabolism.This kind of habit that I do
have. But for the most part I would
(22:23):
add on to that. That is the first thing maybe I
would do, but then I'll do some maybe mobility stuff.
It just sort of like gets me going.
Mobility stuff just takes about 5 minutes.
So I would just do some mobilitystuff then just go into the
zone. Yeah.
But if there's one thing that I do is, yeah, a water just seems
to just so mostly just kick start.
(22:44):
OK, game time right now before anything, I only have my coffee.
I think about 90 minutes after Iawake and at that moment in time
because my cortisol level is actually dipping.
Yeah, but water first. And I'm, and I'm glad you
mentioned mobility because so many guys caught up in the gym
culture, I'm saying never working on mobility ever.
(23:05):
And they just want to get biggerand bigger and stronger and
stronger and not necessarily be able to move.
That is exactly the problem. And The thing is, fish as we get
older, right, mobility is key. Like if you can tell a time
somebody's age by the gate, right?
So, and that's the reason why mobility is something that is
not spoken off enough and torched enough for me.
(23:27):
That's just been a game changer.And it's just been a habit of
mine that I do on a daily. I've got a mat, I'll go on
there, maybe a foam roller, do some stretching.
It doesn't take long. It's only 5 minutes, but it's a
very, very good habit. And I'm ever so thankful for it
because I just feel so much better.
I can actually, yeah, I can. I can run circles around 18 year
(23:50):
olds and 19 year old so. Richie, what's What's one thing
that you wish more men knew? Wow.
I, I think it's, well, that's a good one.
I would say. I think that the only
limitations I think we put is the limitation to put on
ourselves. And I think with, yeah, well,
(24:14):
with men, we tend to, I feel forthe most part, I, I think that's
a generic, but I think it's moreabout those limiting beliefs
that we have. Because I can go back to your
thoughts as well. Be it with the struggles that
we're facing that it is this tooshall pass right?
Be it with Y direction we want to take that we're not stuck and
(24:37):
we're not. We don't have to be stuck in a
dead end job that we did not enjoy and wait till retired then
up a moment in time we can actually enjoy.
Life is that we can pretty much change the course of our lives
and take whatever course we want, and it's all about making
that decision and change that identity and anybody can do
(24:59):
that. And I find, well, like, I wonder
if people can you grow so much that you don't have limiting
beliefs like that? Maybe the Dalai Lama doesn't
have any limiting beliefs, but but I'm I'm not sure if anyone
else. Might I think limiting beliefs
is part of the it's part of it, because I think if you don't, if
you don't sort of like at times have be it imposter syndrome,
(25:20):
whatever it is, that's part of the territory, right.
It's about doing despite becausewhenever new environment you're
getting in, you will have feel like an imposter and it's
normal. We all impostors to start off
with anyway in anything right, because we do not have
confidence of the gate for the most part.
What people stops people, all those having those limiting
(25:41):
beliefs is expected to have the confidence of the gate, but
confidence is rarely there. With confidence, it starts with
what carriage. And what with carriage, you're
just jumping in there, feeling that imposter syndrome feeling,
having those doubts or just jumping in there, then guess
what? Then you commit.
Once you commit, then you got what?
(26:03):
You start building up the capabilities.
Only till you build up the capabilities do you get to have
that confidence. Yeah.
So those limiting beliefs say are normal.
But again, those are the kind ofbarriers as well that can
actually stop us from going after a purpose of actually what
it is and test our limits. Only two would jump in there.
(26:27):
I've got there's a book. Feel the fear and do it anyway,
right? At times you just have to do
that. So Richie, what's the best way
for people to get in touch with you and to find out all the
things that you're offering? I think the best way to reach me
is LinkedIn. I'll respond to all the messages
I post pretty much almost on a daily in LinkedIn and that's
Richie Encounter and just searchon LinkedIn and you'll find me
(26:51):
there, right? And we'll have we'll have links
for Richie's contact info and such and the show notes for this
episode. And Richie, do you see clients
in person only or do you know how some have a hybrid system or
how do you work with people? It's a bit of a combination.
For the most part, the fitness was all online because I started
doing this. I still have my banking
(27:14):
consultancy business and I'm just at the point of I still go
South with, with banks right now.
So my, my time can be quite limited.
I can't really be in the gym to do that.
So fitness was pretty much purely online and he was
designed as such because he did fit for busy professionals and
(27:35):
busy people. So it works around them as
opposed to working around a personal trainer, which was my
pain, right? So that worked fine.
But for the other programs, I doin person talks as well.
I do like talks. I've got corporate training
programs. I've got CTG, which is college
to growth programs, a tool V program for corporate that is in
(27:58):
person, but we also have a virtual version of it.
Then Operator's Edge, which is amastermind for the most part
online, but we also have, we can, we also have in person once
in a while. But for the most part, yeah,
it's, it's online that gives theflexibility I think with digital
world we're in right now and having clients all over the
(28:18):
world as well. So it just makes it so much
better that way. Well.
Thanks, Richie for making the time to talk to us today and
thanks for sharing your your journey, your growth and how
using it just to serve others. This is my favorite sort of man
to meet. Somebody's going to be open
about what he's gone through. And then I was using it to help
other people. So you've got it both.
(28:38):
So thanks again, and thanks everyone for listening.
That was Richie and Connor bringing powerful insights on
discipline, growth, and redefining what it means to
succeed as a man. If something in today's
conversation sparked your interest or hit a little too
close to home, take it as a sign.
Maybe it's your time to upgrade your habits, shift your mindset,
or simply ask yourself, am I winning in the ways that truly
matter? Please reach out to me for a
(29:00):
complimentary clarity call by visiting the Andy grit.com Talk
and we'll explore what's going on in your life and what you can
do to make it better. Until next time, be good to
yourself.
On paper, I look successful, successful banker as you would
call it, bigger goes. But guess what, in the back end,
pretty much living in caffeine, we like she ships on autopilot,
pretty much being reactive, sortof like it's all about the
dopamine and the kind of stuff. Hello and welcome to Real Man
(00:21):
Field, where we explore the evolving pace of masculinity and
help men lead lives of authenticity, purpose, and
power. I'm your host, Andy Grant, and
today I'm joined by a man who knows what it takes to win, not
just in business, but in life. Richie and Connor is an
award-winning author, a former banker, and current
transformation coach who helps high achievers unlock new levels
of growth, fitness, and personalmastery.
(00:44):
From navigating major life transitions to cultivating daily
discipline, Richie is all about building the habits and mindset
that fuels true success. Whether you're on the verge of
burnout or craving A deeper sense of purpose, you're going
to find value in this one. Richie shares the two
motivations of change, the blindspots he sees and successful
men, and explores the body and bank connection.
(01:06):
Let's do it. Hello Richie, and welcome to
Real Men Field. Thanks, Andy.
Thanks for having me. So I know you've gone from being
a a successful banker to a transformation coach.
So first, what first are you interested in banking and then
what triggered the the shift? That's a very interesting
question. I think with banking, I think
that was easy. I think it was the money.
(01:28):
Yeah, I was. I'm a trade CPA.
So I think money I think was an easy motivation at that moment
in time, being a young kid and not really sure exactly what you
want to do, money is always a good motivation.
But I think change happens two ways with the shift from banking
into into transformation. What I've found to say, they say
(01:48):
change happened two ways. It could be through inspiration
or desperation. For me, that shift was more
around desperation. So by that I'm looking myself in
the mirror. I don't like what I see and what
I'm talking about. No liking what I see.
I'm not talking about the aesthetics.
Yes, that too, because I have put on quite a few pans over the
(02:09):
months and I think over years, Ithink with a neglect, I think
with busy with the workouts actually doing, but not like the
way I did show up when I looked in the mirror because I did not
like the way I showed up for my family.
I said, you know, like the way Ishowed up for my friends and
loved ones and and I did not like the way I showed off my
employers. And to tell you the truth, Andy,
(02:31):
I was actually scared and depressed that moment in time
because I got health conditions.I wanted my family at that rate
that I was going things are not looking good.
So it was time for me to make a shift and for me to do that.
Being desperate is going back todrawing board, seeking help and
(02:51):
but this the help that I was actually getting the solution
that was out there was just no right for me.
Being busy with my career in banking and and everything going
on. He had a very short window in
the day and with the PTS of personal trainers that I reached
out to at that time, I need to work around the time which was
(03:12):
just no right for me. So I had to work something out.
So I looked up everything from both nutrition, PT, metabolic
conditioning, but I found that stuff so interesting.
I went deep into the end up getting certified and all that
stuff. And that's what came out.
That solution, the same solutionthat has helped me being able to
(03:35):
not only maintain myself and gethealthier, but also help
hundreds of other people along the way through that.
It was never really meant for meto be a coach.
It was my mess which came into pretty much into into my
message. And through that, people
noticing how I was actually shifting and asking me for help
(03:57):
to actually help him how to do that.
So he was very, very organic in how it all sort of like turned
out. Yeah.
So it so it sounds like your personal growth really mirrors
what you now do with clients. Absolutely.
So everything pretty much I teach has been more about my my
pain points, some stuff I've travelled with being a busy, a
(04:17):
busy professional source to speak from a banking days and
how I can actually maintain health and how the energy what
you lacked and is filling those gaps that now I can actually
articulate that and actually teach that, but it can actually
relate to that. So it could be it could be
anything related to that. For the most part, these are
kind of be burned out, you know,in a case of like mental health
(04:40):
kind of struggles you kind of face as you go through these
kind of phases. So I can actually relate to what
professionals are actually goingthrough and being able to sort
of like bridge that gap as you indicated.
So pretty much my message turning into and into my mess,
my mess turning to my message. So Richie, I wonder how
(05:01):
challenging or easy was it for your identity shift from from
corporate banker to entrepreneurand coach?
To be honest, it wasn't easy. It wasn't easy.
It's something that I've, I've really, I've invested quite a
lot of money and that for me to make that shift.
Having said that, because what I've found is being in a career,
(05:24):
being in a job, it was everything became so easy for
me. I was good at what I did saying
banking in the case, lead transformation programs.
But when I came into the coaching space, it was very,
very different. And being entrepreneur, right, I
had to learn everything about marketing.
I never had to do much marketingin my consulting or on a case of
(05:48):
like kind of work career. Whereas you come in being
entrepreneur, you have to learn all that kind of stuff because
you can have the best part on the marketplace.
If nobody knows about it, nobody's going to buy.
So it's like learning all those new skills and it takes
persistence as well in a case oflike going into the marketplace
(06:09):
and being able to tickle your message, your message as well.
What problem are you actually solving?
How can people actually relate to the problem you're solving?
So you can actually bridge that gap.
So, so it wasn't, it wasn't easy, but I guess I think what
keeps you going is if you are clear on the purpose and that
grind, when that promise is actually very clear as to what
(06:32):
you're looking to achieve, that grind I think is easy.
You can just keep on going. When you first reached out, you,
you, you have this, this niche that that.
I had not heard him phrase this way before, But what?
What is the body and bank connection?
All right, that's quite interesting.
I think that's my, it's based onmy book actually, Body and Bank
(06:52):
Connection. I think this is goes back to the
struggle I had because I'll tellyou a story how it all came
about. I was talking to my fellow
bankers. I was giving a talk and I think
one of the questions I raised iswhat are your thoughts when we
talk about fitness? And for the most part the
answers I normally get, and I did get the end was like 6 pack.
(07:14):
You know, at times you might getan old answer like confidence
and stuff like that, which is quite interesting, right?
And I go like, oh Richie, I do understand the benefits of
exercise and fitness, but I justdon't have the time I need to
put food on the table, right? Which was quite interesting.
I was like, that is very, very interesting because actually
counter intuitive, right? Me having been in that
(07:37):
environment, because guess what?Studies have shown that when you
exercise, they're 20% more productive, right?
Studies have actually shown whenyou exercise, when you're in
that environment, because I was speaking to ban because my
fellow ban, because at that moment in time you are in that
very stressed environment. It's very stressful.
So when you're stressed, guess what?
(07:59):
The coastal levels elevated and what do you need to count to
that? You need things like serotonin,
dopamine to count to that. And guess what, when you
exercise, those are sort of likethe benefits you get in case of
like the happy homeowners, they're related that they're
referred to. We can talk about the cognitive
function. When you are in that demanding
job, you need to be cognitively sharp.
(08:22):
And what's so interesting is there's a study on BDNFBDNF
drives neurogenesis, which is a reproduction of brain cells.
And what was found is that when you exercise, BDNF can be
enhanced as much as threefold 3 times.
So I was speaking to my Bank of friends.
I was like, now with all these facts I just laid down, there's
more to it, but just these 3 facts.
(08:45):
Are you still saying that exercise and fitness is an
option or a necessity? Because I'm going to think about
Richie now. I think it is a necessity.
But so that was pretty much a genesis of my book and getting
to articulate that message. The body and bank connection,
yes, body and bank connection could be in a literal sense as
(09:07):
how you can level up your bank account, right?
Because guess what, we get paid for the value brings to the
marketplace. And as I talked about how you
can be more productive when you exercise, guess what that is
likely going to drive your productivity then that would
drive your bank account. So it could be in a literal
sense, but it could also be a metaphor.
(09:29):
Whatever bank account you're looking to feel, be it your
energy bank account, your productivity bank account, it
starts with what our bodies, andthat is pretty much what that
is. Yeah, that's how it came about.
So yeah, that's my my book Body and Bank Connection.
What are some common misconceptions in in the high
achieving men that you might work with?
Misconceptions about personal development or growth.
(09:52):
Yeah, I, I I think, I think there could be plenty of in the
case of misconception, I think girls, the re exist
misconception that in the case of like girls, maybe it's almost
like a one off, but I think it'ssupposed to be a constant.
I feel like in my case, I'm growing on a daily basis.
I call it playing back the tapeson a daily.
(10:14):
What is it that I could do better today looking at today?
What can I invest into tomorrow?I look at the key pieces that I
learned from today that a positive that I can invest into
tomorrow. What are the things that I can
actually sort of like eliminate.So yeah, so I think with girls,
it's not a one off. We have to keep on going.
(10:36):
The moment you stop growing is the moment you start dying.
So I think that is for me, I think that is maybe I would say
maybe one of them. What are some of the common
blind spots for someone that hasall the outward signs of success
in their life? I think I can, I can tell from
my own experience with that because you have a problem.
(10:58):
I could on paper I look successful, successful banker as
you would call it, bigger goes. But guess what, in the back end,
pretty much living in caffeine, be like she ships an autopilot,
you know, things like that, pretty much being reactive sort
(11:18):
of like it's all about the dopamine and the kind of stuff.
So it is very, very important tothink in the case of having that
identity shift and having that alignment, how is it that that's
what we're going to talk a lot about the operator behind say,
the business or behind whatever it is that we might see from the
outside, which could be a facade, right?
(11:41):
How is it that we can align the underlying operator because in
everything else sort of like then aligns with everything
else. Everything else can just be like
lovers. So I think it's all about how is
it that we show up and how we show up can it's all about, I
think for me, I look at it more about those all three areas,
(12:05):
right? In the case of our health, if
we're not really healthy and we don't feel right in our body, in
our energy because what energy drives execution, we can talk
about having systems that drive scale, right?
So in case of like business, in case of my located maybe from
the wealth perspective, but alsorelationship relationships
(12:27):
pretty much through everything, right.
So it's all about how is it realigned in all those kind of
three areas. And for me you think that is
success that we can relate to the people that actually lift
this up. It's not so much about being in
the room is when we leave the room.
What is it that lingers after weleave that room in the case of
(12:48):
relationships, in the case of health and energy levels, how is
it that we'll wake up where we to go, we know crashing at 2:00
PM, right? Do we have systems in place that
actually drive scale that we just know static we're hitting
that plateau. So I think those are kind of key
areas of thing for me that drivethat can have that full spectrum
(13:10):
success, be it in business and in life.
Richard, when we first spoke you, you talked about the
banking world being a very machismo tough guy place, which
surprised me as a non banker. That is not, that was not my
stereotypical view of of accountants.
So I wonder, how has your view and definition of masculinity
(13:33):
changed throughout your various careers?
Yeah, that's a very, very good point because I think we were,
I, I was going through burnout, I faced it big time.
And I think these are kind of things we don't talk about too
much. And I think as a man as well and
I keep things like even mental health, we don't talk enough
about it. We are meant to just tough it
out and grit and just keep on going, right.
(13:56):
But what to what expense? So yeah, for my banking world,
in my case, my experience was that that, you know, you just
meant in the case of show up, yes, in the case of long hours
that comes with the territory, but it's also just about being
that machismo as you mentioned in the case of toughing it out,
if you show your emotions, you are supposed to be maybe weak or
(14:21):
anything of that perceived as such, which is just think a sad
situation. But I think things are so
changing a little bit right now.So, but that education and
that's the reason I think in my case, I've been driving that
messaging quite a bit that in the case of burnout is not a
badge of honor, right? We can't be just as effective
and push things in scale withoutburning out, without sacrifice.
(14:44):
And that's been my mission because I did drive putting in
place systems, driving billions in the back end, but you find
the operators driving those systems themselves, they're not
really operating at scale. So that has been my mission and
that was been because I was partof that world.
(15:06):
So yes, it's it's very prevalentand it's about begin just being
again that awareness as well, because when you are in that
culture, you don't because that's all you know, that's what
you see. So it becomes ingrained and
becomes the normal, but it had doesn't have to be that.
Beyond burnout and mental health, is there anything else
(15:31):
you're seeing men struggle with today that they're keeping to
themselves? Yeah, I think it's, it's, it's
your openness. I think, man, I think it's
something that we're we're we'resupposed to be more about just
tough it out. It's just maybe not just the
banking world, but for the most part, I think with man, we're
(15:51):
supposed to tough it out. We're not supposed to open up
when we're struggling, but then we end up just bustling up and
the moment we just have that outlet, we just sort of like
almost like burst because we've just been building up for two
months for too long. So how is it that we can be able
(16:12):
to have create open spaces that we can actually your tickler and
communicate? So we appreciate your show,
Andy, because this is kind of stuff that man don't really talk
about openly. I'm struggling.
You know, I'm facing this, right?
You admitting that or me admitting that I have a problem
(16:32):
or I'm struggling with this doesnot feel weakness.
I think if anything, it shows strength being able to.
Yeah, being able to be open about it.
And only till you admit that I'mstruggling or had a problem
would you be able to get that help.
Because you cannot help somebodythat doesn't need, doesn't want
(16:54):
to be helped. Yeah, and men are, well, I'll
speak for myself. I've always been great at
pretending I don't need anybody's help when that's the
thing I need the most. And yeah, I have to get over my
own freaking bullshit of. And really that, that, that.
Perhaps it is that in green distortion of masculinity that
says I've got to figure it out myself, I've got to tough it up.
But yeah, often the bravest thing we can ever do is ask for
(17:18):
help. Absolutely.
I can totally relate because I've been in that boat myself
and I think that's the reason I think I'm trying to create as
much as possible like Operators Edge is part of that as well.
In the case of trying to create that open space where you can,
people can actually communicate,you can open.
This is a safe space, right? No judgement.
How is it that we can create more spaces like this?
(17:39):
Like what are you creating here,Andy, talking about things like
this? Because then when we open up,
man, go like, oh, actually I'm facing.
I'm also having going through that.
But I thought I was the only one.
And if I open up, I'll be seen as weak.
No, it's not weak. Yeah, that's why being willing
to be vulnerable, being willing to share whatever you're going
(18:01):
through it, it not only helps you, it helps everybody else
because it gives other people that hear that permission to go,
oh, I don't have to just keep this to myself.
Like that guy just spilled his guts and the world in mend.
That's that's amazing. That's not what I thought would
happen. Totally.
And it just a release as well. We just talked about both laying
up right that release and the times speaking and talking about
(18:24):
something, it just brings about that clarity as well.
Richard, what, How do you measure success in your work
with clients? Is it just the scale or how much
they bench press? Like what, how?
How do you know someone is succeeding?
I think success for me it's, it's very personal.
So each of one of my clients have got their own goals for me.
(18:44):
Think that one of the best definitions I have for success
is it's almost like a personal progressive realization of 1's
own purpose. So it has to be progressive, it
has to be a worthy as well. Maybe I should add there, right?
Personal progressive realizationof a worthy purpose, right?
(19:05):
So, and that is again, it's veryit's, it's, it's very personal.
So one of my clients come around, this is what I want to
achieve, right? Success for them will look very,
very different. I the same.
It has been like even when I wascoaching on the finance side of
things as well on personal finances, like I've got some
clients who will say like, oh, Richie, this is my financial
(19:26):
independence number. I want the other one would go
like, this is my personal finance number.
I want if I can actually have this money coming in on
autopilot without me lifting a finger, I'm financially
independent. So it's very, very, it's very,
very unique to each and every one of us.
So to your question, success is measured by how is it I can
(19:50):
bridge that gap that a client has come to me and they're
telling me this is my purpose, this is my goal.
This is where I want to hit. And I help them bridge that gap
because I've always shown because.
What do coaches do? I've always, because the time is
always this thing about the caseof like, what do a coach do?
A coach does is pretty much shorten the distance, shorten
(20:12):
that time frame. I looked at it more like, we're
all given these keys in this world, right?
We have this bunch of keys, but trying to find that right key
that's going to open the door tothose New Horizons can be quite
fidgety, might take a little bitof a while.
Sometimes what a coach does is point you to the right key so
(20:34):
you can open that door and get there quicker, so you can
actually go to those New Horizons.
So how is it that I can actuallyhelp them, point them to that
right key and get there quick enough and achieve what it is
that you're trying to achieve? That is success to me.
Excellent. Yeah, I like that metaphor.
I 'cause I, I have been and I see lots of people that kind of
(20:55):
just click keys. I just giant key chains, all
these keys of all these classicsand programs I've ever taken.
And then I don't really know which one to use when I'm faced
with a, with a challenge, though, I, I that, that, that
really, that really resonates with me.
Richie, is there a book that hastruly changed your life?
Wow. Yes, it's actually plenty, but
if I can pick one and this is aneasy read As a Man Thinketh by
(21:19):
James Allen. I've read that book quite a few
times. It's it's, it's a classic.
It's over 100 years old, but it it, it's just amazing in the
case of thought process and, andhow thought does drive our
actions in a lot of ways. And this just goes back to a lot
of things that we talked about, be it mental health and all that
(21:39):
kind of stuff. It's our thoughts, right?
How is it that we can direct those thoughts to the right
purpose? Yeah.
So, yeah, as a man, think it is one of my most, most favorite
books and I read it. I've read it so many times.
You know, I in my life I've found the importance of of
rituals and and and solid habitsto to to create my best life.
(22:02):
What is one thing that you do every day, no matter what?
Wow, 1st every day, no matter what, when I wake up, first
thing is water as they have at least a half a liter of water
just to keep stab my metabolism.This kind of habit that I do
have. But for the most part I would
(22:23):
add on to that. That is the first thing maybe I
would do, but then I'll do some maybe mobility stuff.
It just sort of like gets me going.
Mobility stuff just takes about 5 minutes.
So I would just do some mobilitystuff then just go into the
zone. Yeah.
But if there's one thing that I do is, yeah, a water just seems
to just so mostly just kick start.
(22:44):
OK, game time right now before anything, I only have my coffee.
I think about 90 minutes after Iawake and at that moment in time
because my cortisol level is actually dipping.
Yeah, but water first. And I'm, and I'm glad you
mentioned mobility because so many guys caught up in the gym
culture, I'm saying never working on mobility ever.
(23:05):
And they just want to get biggerand bigger and stronger and
stronger and not necessarily be able to move.
That is exactly the problem. And The thing is, fish as we get
older, right, mobility is key. Like if you can tell a time
somebody's age by the gate, right?
So, and that's the reason why mobility is something that is
not spoken off enough and torched enough for me.
(23:27):
That's just been a game changer.And it's just been a habit of
mine that I do on a daily. I've got a mat, I'll go on
there, maybe a foam roller, do some stretching.
It doesn't take long. It's only 5 minutes, but it's a
very, very good habit. And I'm ever so thankful for it
because I just feel so much better.
I can actually, yeah, I can. I can run circles around 18 year
(23:50):
olds and 19 year old so. Richie, what's What's one thing
that you wish more men knew? Wow.
I, I think it's, well, that's a good one.
I would say. I think that the only
limitations I think we put is the limitation to put on
ourselves. And I think with, yeah, well,
(24:14):
with men, we tend to, I feel forthe most part, I, I think that's
a generic, but I think it's moreabout those limiting beliefs
that we have. Because I can go back to your
thoughts as well. Be it with the struggles that
we're facing that it is this tooshall pass right?
Be it with Y direction we want to take that we're not stuck and
(24:37):
we're not. We don't have to be stuck in a
dead end job that we did not enjoy and wait till retired then
up a moment in time we can actually enjoy.
Life is that we can pretty much change the course of our lives
and take whatever course we want, and it's all about making
that decision and change that identity and anybody can do
(24:59):
that. And I find, well, like, I wonder
if people can you grow so much that you don't have limiting
beliefs like that? Maybe the Dalai Lama doesn't
have any limiting beliefs, but but I'm I'm not sure if anyone
else. Might I think limiting beliefs
is part of the it's part of it, because I think if you don't, if
you don't sort of like at times have be it imposter syndrome,
(25:20):
whatever it is, that's part of the territory, right.
It's about doing despite becausewhenever new environment you're
getting in, you will have feel like an imposter and it's
normal. We all impostors to start off
with anyway in anything right, because we do not have
confidence of the gate for the most part.
What people stops people, all those having those limiting
(25:41):
beliefs is expected to have the confidence of the gate, but
confidence is rarely there. With confidence, it starts with
what carriage. And what with carriage, you're
just jumping in there, feeling that imposter syndrome feeling,
having those doubts or just jumping in there, then guess
what? Then you commit.
Once you commit, then you got what?
(26:03):
You start building up the capabilities.
Only till you build up the capabilities do you get to have
that confidence. Yeah.
So those limiting beliefs say are normal.
But again, those are the kind ofbarriers as well that can
actually stop us from going after a purpose of actually what
it is and test our limits. Only two would jump in there.
(26:27):
I've got there's a book. Feel the fear and do it anyway,
right? At times you just have to do
that. So Richie, what's the best way
for people to get in touch with you and to find out all the
things that you're offering? I think the best way to reach me
is LinkedIn. I'll respond to all the messages
I post pretty much almost on a daily in LinkedIn and that's
Richie Encounter and just searchon LinkedIn and you'll find me
(26:51):
there, right? And we'll have we'll have links
for Richie's contact info and such and the show notes for this
episode. And Richie, do you see clients
in person only or do you know how some have a hybrid system or
how do you work with people? It's a bit of a combination.
For the most part, the fitness was all online because I started
doing this. I still have my banking
(27:14):
consultancy business and I'm just at the point of I still go
South with, with banks right now.
So my, my time can be quite limited.
I can't really be in the gym to do that.
So fitness was pretty much purely online and he was
designed as such because he did fit for busy professionals and
(27:35):
busy people. So it works around them as
opposed to working around a personal trainer, which was my
pain, right? So that worked fine.
But for the other programs, I doin person talks as well.
I do like talks. I've got corporate training
programs. I've got CTG, which is college
to growth programs, a tool V program for corporate that is in
(27:58):
person, but we also have a virtual version of it.
Then Operator's Edge, which is amastermind for the most part
online, but we also have, we can, we also have in person once
in a while. But for the most part, yeah,
it's, it's online that gives theflexibility I think with digital
world we're in right now and having clients all over the
(28:18):
world as well. So it just makes it so much
better that way. Well.
Thanks, Richie for making the time to talk to us today and
thanks for sharing your your journey, your growth and how
using it just to serve others. This is my favorite sort of man
to meet. Somebody's going to be open
about what he's gone through. And then I was using it to help
other people. So you've got it both.
(28:38):
So thanks again, and thanks everyone for listening.
That was Richie and Connor bringing powerful insights on
discipline, growth, and redefining what it means to
succeed as a man. If something in today's
conversation sparked your interest or hit a little too
close to home, take it as a sign.
Maybe it's your time to upgrade your habits, shift your mindset,
or simply ask yourself, am I winning in the ways that truly
matter? Please reach out to me for a
(29:00):
complimentary clarity call by visiting the Andy grit.com Talk
and we'll explore what's going on in your life and what you can
do to make it better. Until next time, be good to
yourself.
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