April 9, 2025 • 56 mins
Zoe Smith shares her transformative journey from a high-powered career to becoming a holistic healing practitioner, offering powerful insights on overcoming fear to reach our goals and healing the whole self.
• Everything we want exists on the other side of fear, but we must focus on our goals rather than obstacles
• The breath directly connects to our parasympathetic nervous system, making breathwork a powerful tool for reducing stress hormones
• QHHT (Quantum Healing Hypnosis Technique) helps resolve past trauma and provides healing through accessing the subconscious
• Reiki channels universal life force energy to balance the body's energy systems and remove blockages
• Despite increased technological connectivity, people report feeling more disconnected and lonely than ever before
• Healing is an ongoing journey of peeling away layers, not a one-time event
• Simple daily practices like breathwork, gratitude exercises, and using the five senses can bring us back to center
Connect with Zoe at yourvitalitycoaching.com or find her on Facebook and Instagram to learn more about her services, which are available worldwide through Zoom.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:08):
Welcome back to part two of our conversation with the
incredible Zoe Smith, with yourVitality Coaching.
If you caught the first episode, you already know her story is
one of radical transformation,stepping away from a
high-powered career to fullyembracing a path of healing and
wholeness.
We're going to dig into somepretty big questions.
(00:29):
How do we move through fear toreach success?
What does it truly mean to healthe whole self, and how can
small rituals create massiveshifts in our emotional and
physical well-being?
Zoe's also going to open upabout who she is today, after
pressing pause in her life, whatsurprised her most about that
journey and how she now helpsothers reconnect with themselves
(00:52):
through powerful healingmodalities like QHHT, reiki,
sound therapy, yoga, body combatand actually being a life coach
.
The conversation is honest,uplifting and filled with
practical wisdom, so let's jumpin.
I've reinvented myself many,many times and I really believe
(01:12):
in constantly evolving.
You are the poster person forreinventing yourself, I think,
and I think we have to giveourselves permission many times
in order to do that.
What have you learned abouttransformation and what gives
you the courage to keep evolvinginto new, into new versions of
(01:36):
yourself?
Speaker 2 (01:38):
yeah, I asked.
Yeah, I haven't.
I have, um, transformed manytimes, not intentionally, but I
think it's part of life'sjourney, and I think my current
boss has a saying, and I thinkhe got it from George Adair.
George Adair's famous quote iseverything that you want is on
the other side of fear, and myboss translated that to and he
(02:02):
uses it in his fitness classessometimes to motivate people,
and he'll say um, the magichappens on the other side of the
stuff that you don't want to do.
Well, actually, both of both ofthose are absolutely spot on,
because the stuff that we finddifficult, the stuff we're
scared of, the stuff that wedon't want to do, we have to
(02:24):
overcome that in order to movein order to transform and
develop.
And when I think back, likemoving from England to China, I
remember I packed my house up, Igave most of my belongings away
or I sold them, and I headedoff to China with two suitcases
(02:44):
and no real plan.
I knew that I wanted to livethere, I knew I wanted to work
and I knew I wanted to travel.
That was my plan.
I had no idea how long I wasgoing for, um, if I would have
known that covid was going tobreak out, I think I'd have gone
five years sooner, but anyway,um.
So yeah, was that scary?
Yes, but I didn't focus on thefear.
(03:07):
I focused on what I reallywanted to achieve.
And if I would have been frozenin the fear, I would have never
done it.
Fear out of the way, accept it,acknowledge it.
(03:28):
But we still have to to keepgoing, don't we?
Otherwise we remain stuck andthat is a choice.
Speaker 1 (03:31):
That's something else , it is a choice.
Speaker 2 (03:32):
It's a choice.
None of us are rooted to thespot.
We've all got choice.
That choice might not be niceand it might not be a welcome
choice.
It might be hard to make, butit's a choice and yeah, and so
evolving and I don't think a lotof us realize or feel, see that
choice.
Speaker 1 (03:51):
We don't.
You know a lot of people reallydon't see themselves being able
to go through the fear, get tothe other side, because success
or whatever you really want isreally on the other side and you
, you know fear is a lie, youknow most of the things that are
standing in between us andwhatever we want to achieve
(04:12):
isn't really even going tohappen.
And we have to allow ourselvesto just forge through, no matter
what.
But I mean, it is really hardbecause it is a big block and
it's being able to push throughthat mountain or whatever it is
(04:34):
that stand in between us andwherever we want to be, and just
allow ourselves to succeed.
Speaker 2 (04:40):
Yeah, it's having the courage.
Isn't it being brave?
Yeah, it's having the courage.
Speaker 1 (04:44):
Isn't it being brave?
Yes, taking that leap, yeah, Ilike those words From that crazy
life that you led before acouple of different times.
It sounds like to who you aretoday because you are a much
more grounded person.
How different are you todayfrom that person that had to
(05:04):
pause for that five months?
Speaker 2 (05:08):
Oh, completely different.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm muchcalmer, I'm much more laid back,
incredibly flexible.
I'm organized in a flexiblekind of a way, so I'm still
organized.
I like that.
To the outside person lookinginto my life, it might look a
(05:33):
bit chaotic, whereas in the pastit would have looked very
organized and disciplined.
I'm still organized anddisciplined, but I am a lot more
more laid back with it.
Um, okay, I tend to be late fora lot of things nowadays, to be
honest.
Speaker 1 (05:51):
and um, I'm not very late, but maybe five minutes
late and okay well, you're busy,just needing that extra five
minutes to take care of yourself.
Speaker 2 (06:02):
Yeah, yeah, and I don't mind about that now and I
will tell people.
In fact, we were talking aboutpronouns the other day and how
people are using pronouns and Isaid mine are almost there.
I identify as late.
My pronouns are almost there.
That's awesome.
Oh, I love that.
(06:24):
I think, alongside all that,I've grown in confidence a lot.
I'm very happy and comfortablein my own skin and with who I am
, Whereas in the past thatwasn't always the case and I
think it really made me think.
A few weeks ago I covered anaqua class and so I was there on
the side of the pool doing mything and motivating everyone
(06:45):
and shouting and getting up, andin the class there was a lady
who had come to say hi at thebeginning and I haven't seen her
for years and she's my friend,who I went to school with.
It's her mom, and I haven'tseen my friend for years and I
haven't seen her mom for years.
So we were reminiscing a littlebit.
And then she got in the pooland I started the class and
partway through the class I'mlike come on everybody, how are
(07:07):
we feeling?
And she said Zoe, you used tobe so quiet and shy and a nice
person and now you're justbullying me.
Speaker 1 (07:16):
Oh, my goodness.
Speaker 2 (07:18):
And it really made me laugh because I thought, yeah,
I am completely different now tohow I would have been when she
knew me back at school.
Speaker 1 (07:27):
Well, a beautiful transformation.
Anything surprise you aboutyour journey learning about
yourself, Everything.
Speaker 2 (07:35):
Yeah, I love seeing how things unfold.
I love seeing the magic of theuniverse.
I love seeing the miracles andthe synchronicities and things
that life throws at us.
That there's no.
I believe there's no such thingas a coincidence.
I believe that everybody, andeverything that happens is for a
(07:56):
reason, and that reason mightbe a lesson where we learn
something, or it could be ablessing, where you're feeling
desperate about something andthen suddenly something happens
and it changes it all.
And I am always surprised bylife and I embrace those
surprises.
I look forward to see, like,where things go and I'm a really
(08:18):
big believer in trying thingsand seeing what happens.
I love that.
Speaker 1 (08:23):
Yeah, I believe in exposure for my kids.
I mean it's just being exposedto everything and being open.
I mean that's really important.
Now talk about being open aboutdifferent things.
You now offer a powerful rangeof modalities.
You have so much experience.
(08:44):
You offer the QHHT, which youtalked about, the quantum
healing, hypnosis technique,which we will talk about.
These things Reiki, yoga, soundtherapy, coaching, even body
combat, which I found reallyinteresting.
How do you determine whatsomeone needs and how do you
help people recognize wherethey're out of balance, either
(09:07):
mentally, emotionally,physically or spiritually?
Speaker 2 (09:11):
yeah, that's an interesting question, um,
because I learned a long timeago, um, that you can't force
your help on other people.
So some so you can easily lookat someone else's life and say,
oh, you should be doing this,you should try that.
But we all know that whenpeople do that for us, we often
(09:31):
don't listen.
We have to figure that out forourselves.
So really early on in mycoaching I realized even though
I thought I knew what peopleneeded then that wasn't the
approach that I should be taking.
So I focus a lot on askingquestions.
I am nosy and I ask lots ofquestions, and I really love
getting to know my clients,whether that's in the gym doing
(09:54):
exercise, rehab, or whether it'ssomeone who comes for Reiki,
and then we get chatting andlook at other things that will
help in their life.
So I ask a lot of um, and itdoes depend a lot on the
scenario.
I recently had um a chap come tome who'd lost mobility due to a
spinal injury, so so I was sortof trying to understand what it
(10:17):
was that he was wanting toachieve, and I'm making
suggestions to him about what wecould do and everything that I
suggested.
He came up with a negative.
Oh well, no, that won't workbecause.
Oh well, I tried that and thatdidn't work.
And oh no, I'm not so sureabout that.
So this had gone on for aboutfive or 10 minutes and in the
end I put my clipboard down andsat back in my chair and I just
(10:38):
went.
So what is it you do want?
Why are you here?
And I can come across as bluntand direct I can be blunt and
direct sometimes so he sort ofhe looked at me and sort of
stopped and he thought for aminute and then he answered and
then we carried on from there.
So he'd been coming to the gymfor a number of weeks and he'd
(11:00):
made some really good progress.
And I commented on his progressone day and I said wow, look how
far you've come.
Well done with this.
And he said well, it's all you.
And I said it's not all me.
I said it's all down to you.
You're the one who's put thework in.
He went no, no, it's all you,zoe.
And I said how is it me?
And he said well, you asked methat question when we first met
(11:22):
and I'd forgotten about this.
And I said which question wasthat?
And he said well, he said youjust stopped and looked at me
and went well, what is it you dowant?
And he said I hadn't actuallythought about that.
And he said I realized what youmeant and it made me think.
And he said I went home afterthat and I was thinking what do
(11:43):
I actually want, want?
And so sometimes it's aboutasking the right question, which
sometimes I get right andsometimes I don't, but then from
there working with that personto put things in place.
So that chap as well was veryclosed to alternative therapies
when I first met him.
I asked him in that firstmeeting are you open to
alternative therapies?
(12:04):
Because that's what I willusually say to people, to
quickly determine whether or notit's something they would be
willing to consider.
And he, his response was prettymuch no, um, and so I moved on
to my next question and justdismissed that.
And then he mentioned to meabout somebody that he knew who
was a Reiki master, and he wassort of laughing about it and
(12:27):
and saying you know, I don'tthink that.
What a load of rubbish.
And I said, oh, a reiki master.
Yes, I'm a reiki master.
And he went oh, oh and uh and Isaid but don't worry, I said I
won't, I won't mention it withyou because I can see that it's
not for you.
And then, because he got toknow me a little bit by that
point, then he was intriguedbecause he his sort of
(12:49):
perception of me and how we'dwork together.
But then he then he's realizingthat I'm doing other things as
well and he's suddenly intriguedand uh, and now he's having
Reiki and it's making a reallybig difference to his life.
So it can be a journey workingwith other people, and I've
really realized it has to bevery step-by-step and it has to
(13:11):
be led by them and I'm justthere to make suggestions, ask
questions, get them thinking.
Speaker 1 (13:18):
Sure, because it really is about them getting to
know themselves.
It is yeah, and they've got towant to.
Yeah, helping them help it isyeah, and they've got to want to
.
Yeah, helping them helpthemselves Exactly yeah.
But I have a few questionsabout what exactly some of these
things are, because I have noidea what QHHT is and how it
(13:39):
supports deep healing.
So if you could talk a littlebit about that, Because it vast.
Speaker 2 (13:46):
So I'll just I'll give us okay.
Speaker 1 (13:47):
In a nutshell, for the lay person who has no clue
what it is.
Speaker 2 (13:53):
So.
It was developed by the late umdolores cannon, um, who was an
american lady, and she worked onon the technique over a 40-year
career and sort of found it byaccident working with
hypnotherapy, and theneventually it evolved into what
(14:16):
we now know and love as QHHT ofhypnotherapy, where you take the
person back in time, regressthem back to wherever their
higher self or subconscioustakes them.
Now that might be a past lifeor it might be earlier in their
current life.
It'll be somewhere in time thatthey that will be directly
(14:43):
relevant to whatever issuesgoing on in their life now.
So it's it's a complex, yetsimple at the same time process.
Um, so I've had it done on me,because when I was training to
become a practitioner, um, arequirement is that you have it
done on you so that because ifyou've not had that experience,
(15:06):
you can't understand it and howit might play out for other
people.
So in my session I was takenback to a past life and in that
past life I was able to describewhat was going on and why and
how I was feeling, and we wentright through that past life up
to the point of death and thenmoved into what happens after
(15:29):
death.
So even if somebody'sexperienced something truly
horrific, say like being burntat the stake or if they drowned
or something horrific, theydon't feel that.
So you can take them throughthe experience without them
feeling any of that.
So it's all safe.
But it can help resolve anyhistorical unresolved trauma.
(15:53):
It can help you understand anyemotional pain that you're
dealing with or physical painSometimes, when we've got
physical health conditions inthis life.
Sometimes that can be linkedwith a past life.
Sometimes it can be somethingthat our higher self or our soul
has chosen for us to experiencein this life and we just have
(16:14):
to go through that because it'sone of our lessons.
So then, once you've gonethrough your past life safely,
we will then meet with thesubconscious and we will.
At that point you can ask thesubconscious any questions you
want the answers to.
So I sat down before my sessionand I think I had two a4 sides
(16:35):
of questions.
You can ask about anything.
You can ask about anythingthat's happened in your life.
You can ask tough questions.
You're going through at thetime all sorts about your life
and you get the answers andduring that same segment of of
the healing, if you have anyphysical ailments that you would
(16:58):
like to understand why you'vegot them or how you can work
through them, you can also askfor healing and if it's
appropriate for that conditionto be healed, then the
subconscious will step in andheal the body.
So as a practitioner, I havedone a number of sessions where
people have had healing, butthere's always one that sticks
(17:20):
in my mind and it was for agentleman who had had a spinal
injury.
He'd had several spinaloperations and he had QHHT with
me and during the healing partwe asked for healing for his
spine and I could see his bodymoving independently.
I wasn't touching him I don'tneed to touch during qhht, um,
(17:40):
and his body was just movingindependently, twitching and
moving, and his spine wasrealigning and healing.
And at the end of that sessionover the next couple of weeks,
the more you you get a recordingof your session and the more
you listen to it before you fallasleep, the more healing comes
through, because you're in thatdeeply relaxed state and whilst
(18:01):
you're having the hypnotherapyyou're in a deeply relaxed state
.
So when you're in that deepstate of relaxation, that is
when the body can heal itselfand he was able to go back to
playing football with his son,which he'd never done for years,
and he had been asemi-professional boxer before
he'd had his injury.
He went back and had anothersemi-professional fight after
(18:24):
that and he'd been in agony foryears and yet he was able to get
healing.
And I know when I, when I hadmine, I'd asked for healing on
my spine because I'd been havinglow back problems and I and I
had a similar experience wheremy body just I could feel it.
I could feel my body moving asI was lying there, because
(18:45):
you're in a deeply relaxed statebut you're still aware of
what's going on around you.
It's, um, it's a an amazingexperience.
Incredible.
Yeah, yeah, it doesn't healeverything.
So, for example, I my eyesightis terrible I've got really long
eyesight and I'd asked forhealing on my eyes as well that
(19:06):
that didn't come through, whichmeans for me that's obviously
before I came into this life,that's something that my soul
had chosen for me, so I'm notmeant to have good eyesight in
this life, but yet my spineproblems were resolved.
So, yeah, it is amazing.
(19:27):
Wow, could you talk a little bitabout Reiki, because I
personally I know a little bitabout it, but for our listeners
just explain it a little bitplease so Reiki is a Japanese
form of healing and well, comesfrom Japan and it's working with
the universal life force,energy, which is the energy that
(19:49):
we've all got inside us andthat we all share, and it's what
links us all with the universe.
That energy has no beginningand no end.
It changes form and changesshape, um, and so with reiki I
work as a channel.
I I work between your energyand the energy from the universe
(20:10):
and I am just a channel tochannel healing energy to, to
your body.
So I work over the body in theenergy field.
I don't all.
I occasionally I'll put myhands on the body, but not very
often.
I usually work above the energyfield or on the aura and I am
just channeling energy to thebody.
Now I can sense through myhands, as I'm doing that, where
(20:34):
healing is needed, um, and I cansense where there's blockages
in people's energy and Reikijust works to.
It puts you into that deeplyrelaxed state where your body
can heal itself, and then it'sjust working with that energy to
realign it, to remove anyblocks, to balance your energy.
(20:56):
I work over the chakras.
We've got seven main chakrapoints down our body, from the
crown of our head to the tip ofour tailbone.
I'll work over those points.
But I'll also work on otherareas of the body as well, and
I've had some amazingexperiences.
Reiki works on a body, mind andsoul level, so the healing goes
(21:19):
wherever your higher selfdetermines you need it.
So somebody might come to mewith really bad pain in their
knee, but they've also beengoing through a heavily
emotional time, and so thehealing will go purely to their
emotions, which can be verysubtle, and not the knee, and
then they'll say to me oh, itdidn't work.
And then I have to then coaxout of them like what else is
(21:44):
going on?
Where else might it have gone?
Have you been feeling anydifferently in yourself?
And then they'll say oh well,I've been feeling a bit calmer.
Oh well, there we go.
Um.
So sometimes it can be verysubtle and you have to take a
step back, go, hang on a minute.
The healing's gone somewhere,because it always does.
So where has it gone?
And then once.
So if somebody is going throughan emotional or stressful time
(22:08):
and they get that healing there,then if they come back for more
Reiki, then it may well then goto the painful knee or wherever
else it's needed.
So it's body, mind and soul andyou don't get to choose, and I
don't get to choose where thatgoes, but your higher self does.
But then, on the other hand,I've had clients who have come
(22:28):
to me and can't walk without astick and after a few sessions
of Reiki they're walking withouta stick and thinking of going
back to ballroom dancing, andit's amazing.
It's absolutely amazing.
It's like magic to me and Inever get sick of it.
I just love to see how it works.
Speaker 1 (22:46):
Oh my gosh.
So in a way, I mean, eventhough your healthcare system
has turned into what it is andpeople are going to alternative
ways of healing, it seems likeyou know that's a good thing.
Speaker 2 (22:59):
I think so.
I think we've all got the powerwithin us to heal and to heal
each other.
This isn't a special skill.
I've got that no one else hasgot.
I've just tapped intounderstanding, energy healing
and now I'm doing it and we'veall got that ability.
We've been born with, with thatability, but we're not told
(23:19):
about it and we're not taughthow to use it and we've all
forgotten about it as a as arace.
We've forgotten about it and Ithink if we could all just
remember that and tap into itand if we were all doing it, how
amazing would life be.
We wouldn't need it, would besome of the pharmaceuticals and
(23:39):
things like that.
Speaker 1 (23:41):
Yeah, it would definitely be different, and I
think that those things are well.
Yeah, I think that a lot ofthose medicines are killing us,
so so do I, so do I yeah,they're not designed.
Speaker 2 (23:53):
I did read something the other day about one of the
large pharmaceutical companiesand how they'd been around for a
certain amount of time and inthat time they've hardly healed
anyone, and I thought, yeah,they're not designed to heal.
They've put all that investmentinto research and the latest
technology and yet actuallypeople are still sick oh yeah
(24:13):
yeah, I think the ancientcivilizations understood all
this.
they used to use it egypt, theMayans, so many of them and it's
got lost in time.
But it's got lost for a reason.
It's been hidden from us for areason so that we're more easily
controlled, because we've gotall this ability and it's
(24:36):
important we get it back.
Speaker 1 (24:39):
I really want to know this what is body combat?
Speaker 2 (24:43):
It's an exercise class.
It's part of the Les Millsclasses.
It's one of their programs.
It's been really popular.
It's been around for a longtime and I've been instructing
body combat classes for a fewyears now.
So it's all set to music andit's using different combat
moves.
So you might be punching or alldifferent types of punches and
(25:06):
then kicks, and it's allthreaded together through
choreography and there's usuallyabout 10 tracks in an hour's
class and you'll cover all thedifferent types of martial art
within a class and it's intense.
You can take it down to yourlevel, um, but no matter what
your level is, if you're workinghard in class you are sweating.
(25:26):
Is it like zumba kind of, inthat it's a cardio class and
you'll work hard and sweat.
Speaker 1 (25:34):
Yeah well, I used to work out all the time.
I do treadmill and things likethat.
I'm I am constantly moving, uh.
But that is something that I'mreally interested in doing is
high intensive, either dance orsome kind of an exercise like
that.
So I really believe in that.
(25:55):
That's because I mean you haveto keep moving.
Speaker 2 (25:58):
You have to Absolutely Use it or lose it.
Yeah, oh, 100%.
What do you do as a life coach?
As a life coach, my lifecoaching kind of threads
together all of the above in away.
So it may be that somebodywants to set some goals and make
a plan for the future, butthey're not really sure how to
(26:20):
set the goals, or they're notsure how to work towards them,
or they need someone to keepthem accountable.
So it might be that that's myrole there.
Or it might be that to improvetheir lifestyle and put some
measures in place to improvetheir health or fitness, and
we'll work through techniquesaround that.
Or it could be relationshipissues or um, career issues or
(26:46):
or anything really that's partof life.
So it's vast um, and it's givingdifferent strategies,
techniques, um, and helping themunpick any blockages they may
have and helping them thinkthrough the consequences of not
doing something and realizingthey've got a choice and whether
(27:07):
they choose to make that changeand how.
So it can be quite powerful.
It's an opportunity for someoneto take a step back, gain that
perspective in order to thenstep forward.
It can be um really interesting.
I've and I'm starting to workwith more young people.
I think covid's got had animpact on our young people.
(27:30):
They they were going throughcovid in their formative years,
whereas it was hard enough forus as adults to go through those
changes but, yeah, for childrento go through them, that's had
lasting effects on a lot of ourour young people, and so I've
been working with some youngpeople looking at coping
(27:51):
strategies, um breathingtechniques, helping them realize
they have choices and whatthose choices look like, and
that's been quite interesting aswell.
Speaker 1 (28:06):
Do you think that we underestimate how connected our
emotional health is to ourphysical well-being, and how do
you guide clients through thatconnection in your practice?
Speaker 2 (28:20):
I think we do underestimate that massively
because the breath is one of ourbiggest links in our body.
Our breath links us directlywith our parasympathetic nervous
system, which is the system inour body that calms us us.
So when we're at stress orwe're feeling there's an
(28:41):
emergency or something like that, we're in our fight or flight.
Uh okay, pathetic nervoussystem, cortisol levels are high
, we're ready to go, but we'reonly designed to be in that
space for very short periods todeal with those emergencies.
However, the pace of modernlife means that more and more
people are in that heightenedzone with raised cortisol levels
(29:02):
for long periods of time.
And unless you're aware andunless you're thinking about how
to lower those cortisol levelsagain, then it can actually have
lasting effects.
It can be responsible for heartconditions, diabetes, all sorts
of different physicalconditions, and it's really
(29:23):
simple to employ some verysimple breathing techniques and
the breath connects us straightaway with that parasympathetic
nervous system, which reducesthose cortisol levels back down,
make us feel calm, makes usfeel peaceful, gives us our
clarity and our focus and ourvision back, which we lose when
we're up here all the timebecause we're feeling
(29:45):
overwhelmed, we're on edge andwe can't select.
So we massively underestimatethat as a nation, as as a world.
Um, in modern life, technologyis great.
Technology is amazing.
It's made all sorts of changesto our lives for the better, but
it's also made a lot of changesto our lives that have not been
(30:06):
for the best, and I think wehave to learn how to use
technology better, how to regaina balance and a pace of life.
And so, yeah, breathworktechniques are something I use
with a lot of my clients,whether that's through yoga I've
(30:27):
introduced it into some of myexercise classes in the
cool-down section I try andeducate my clients using
breathwork in the gym.
Again, I've had real successworking with some of my younger
clients, um, introducing breathwork techniques to them, um, and
explaining why.
(30:47):
Because if you just say to topeople, it'll calm you down.
Sometimes they're like no, yeah, I don't see how that's going
to help.
But when you explain thescience behind it from to do it
with you, they're like oh, yeah,actually I do feel calm now.
Speaker 1 (31:03):
Um, it's so powerful, and so these things can
actually lower cortisol.
Yeah, without having to takesome of these prescribed
medications to lower cortisolyeah, you're doing breath work.
Speaker 2 (31:19):
You know in the moment when you're feeling
anxious, or at night, if youcan't settle and if you just
follow a few simple breath worktechniques.
One of my favorite is I justshut my eyes and I'll breathe in
to the count of three, out tothe count of three.
Now, that means that I'm havingto focus on my breath and I'm
counting.
So whilst I'm focusing on mybreath and I'm counting, I'm not
(31:42):
able to do anything else.
I'm not able to think aboutwhat it was that was stressing
me out the second before or anyof those things.
So breathe in for three, out forthree, do that for three or
four rounds, and then I'llbreathe in for three, out for
four.
So I'm slowly lengthening thatexhale and I'll do that for
three or four rounds and then Ibreathe in for three, out for
(32:05):
five.
Now I've really lengthened thatexhale and I'll sit with that
until I start to feel peacefuland I just sit and count, and
then I'll bring it back downthree and four, and then I bring
it back down three and threeand by the time I've done that
and it might only take and four,and then I bring it back down
three and three, and by the timeI've done that and it might
only take two minutes, by thetime I've done that, whatever it
was that was stressing me out aminute before I've forgotten,
(32:31):
I'm feeling calm and I'm readyto go again.
Speaker 1 (32:32):
That's powerful Massively.
I've got two kids who wentthrough a lot of trauma before I
adopted them and their cortisollevels are high, so that's
really interesting.
I am definitely going to lookinto that with them.
Speaker 2 (32:52):
Do that with them, and there's loads of different
exercises, um, and some willappeal to people, to individuals
, more than others, and so it'sworth trying different ones
until you find one that worksfor them.
But I think the practice ofdoing it, the calmness that they
will feel as they do it andafter it, just really opens your
(33:16):
eyes to a simple technique thatcan really help.
Speaker 1 (33:20):
Well, that's one thing, possibly for someone
who's brand new to things likeenergy healing and yoga.
Where do you suggest they start?
I mean the breath work oranywhere else?
Speaker 2 (33:33):
Breath work's a really good place to start.
People struggle with meditationat first, um, because usually
the usually when we needmeditation in the moment, it's
when our head is so busy andfull of chatter, and, and that
can be when it's hard tomeditate.
And I find that breath work isreally good because if you're
(33:57):
counting in the way that I wasjust talking about, for example,
then you can only focus oncounting and breath, so you've
got one single point of focus,which is what helps with calming
the mind.
So breath work's a really goodway to start.
Sometimes, when you'vepracticed breath work a little
(34:18):
bit, you can then move intomeditation, and breath work is a
good way into meditationbecause you've calmed yourself.
Then you can meditate.
Um, yoga can help some people ifthey um, some of us have got a
lot of energy and can't sitstill and just sitting down to
do breath work is hard in itself.
(34:39):
So yoga does the same thing,but you're moving, so you're
moving into a pose and you mightinhale one way, exhale down,
whatever that pose is, but againyou're focusing on the movement
, the body and the breath, andso it's a single point of focus
again.
And then another one that Ilike is the sound therapy a
(35:01):
single point of focus again, andthen another one that I like is
the sound therapy.
So for sound healing, I'll getpeople to lay on the floor in a
really comfy position for them.
They might have blankets andsleeping bag, whatever to make
them feel really comfy, and thenthey just lay there and listen
to the sound.
So again, listening to thesounds, and there'll be
different sounds at differentfrequencies, and that helps put
(35:21):
you into that relaxed state onceagain, and then that's when you
can really calm the mind andthe body starts to heal itself.
So I think those are three of myfavorites because they're
accessible for most people.
One of them will appeal more toeach individual than another,
but they're a way intorelaxation, um, where people can
(35:44):
just relax, and often peoplewill say to me oh, I can't do
yoga, because when I was doingthis, all I was thinking about
was that.
And I said to them right, okay,so instead of letting your mind
wander, bring it back.
What are you doing with yourbody at that time?
How is your body aligned?
How are you breathing?
(36:04):
Are you aligning your breathwith your movement?
And there's no where for themind to go when you're fully in
the moment.
But being fully in the momentis hard sometimes in modern life
.
Speaker 1 (36:17):
It sounds like the mind might be one of our biggest
barriers.
I would think so.
I mean, are there any reallybig barriers that you see with?
Because you've seen peoplestuck, lost, disconnected, and
what would you say?
Some of the biggest barriersare that hold people back.
Speaker 2 (36:40):
The mind is one of our most powerful tools.
Yeah, the power of the mind isphenomenal, but, yeah, it can,
equally as much as it can be oneof our most powerful tools for
taking us forward, it can alsobe a powerful tool in holding us
back.
And that couples up with someof the expectations that we
place on ourselves that areunreasonable, the expectations
(37:03):
that society places on us orthat we feel society might be
placing on us.
Some of the traditions whatwill your family think, what's
your family expect from you?
All of those things, extrapressures that we put on
ourselves.
Keeping up with material wantspeople place um success on what
(37:25):
they own sometimes, and thenbeing able to achieve having
that house, that car, thatholiday, whatever it, oh,
whatever it is.
For you people, that can be abarrier.
Yeah, feeling trapped andtrying to live someone else's
dreams for your life.
Sometimes people are so focusedon living other people's dreams
(37:46):
they don't even realize they'redoing it, and then they don't
know what their dreams actuallyare, and it isn't until years
down the line.
Sometimes people say I've beenliving his life, or I've been
living her life, I've been doingwhat my mum wanted and, and now
she's gone and I don't knowwhat I want, and that's really
(38:07):
sad, because we've all got thechoice and stepping outside of
those expectations that we puton ourselves or that we feel are
put on us, um, is it'simportant, it's really important
, to be able to do that.
So I think one of the biggestthings is is being able to
identify what brings you joy um,some people don't know what
(38:30):
brings them joy and to be, ableto, to know what it is that
brings you joy and then to maketime for it.
Um, and when we feel that joy,it brings us back to a state of
peace in itself, um, we'refeeling happy doing whatever it
is that brings us joy.
We're joyful while we're doingit and that helps us to think
(38:51):
clearly and it gives us the timeto do it.
So we've set aside some time todo something we love and it can
be so therapeutic.
But making time can be the hardthing, can't it?
Um, stepping back and andreally reflecting on on on
things it can.
(39:11):
That can be the hardest thing.
Speaker 1 (39:12):
Prioritizing ourselves oh, that is so
important and I hear you sayoften is that it's just finding
something that brings you backto center.
And you know it's sometimesbecause my life is really crazy.
It's sitting down and putting apuzzle together or painting or
(39:34):
drawing, because I love doingthose kinds of things, or
getting out in nature and doingmy photography that I love.
You know it's really importantthat we have to do those things
in the crazy.
Now, in your view, what does itreally mean to heal the whole
(39:56):
self, and do you think that weever can really reach that?
Speaker 2 (40:02):
I think it's an ongoing process.
I think we can heal the wholeself, but it's not a do it once,
done forever, and I think thewhole healing process happens.
I often describe it as likepeeling an onion so you peel
away a layer of healing and youdeal with it and you feel good,
(40:26):
and then life carries on andthen something else happens and
it triggers the memory or anemotion, or there's a situation
that's got out of hand, or, andthen you peel away that layer
and you heal it and you throw itaway and life moves on and it's
a constant journey.
But as we go through thatjourney, if we are taking the
time to understand ourselves, tolearn about ourselves, to
(40:50):
figure out what brings us backto our center, to understand
what brings us joy, to learnfrom our mistakes, then as we go
through life, peeling thoselayers and dealing with them
gets easier.
Each time, or sometimesthere'll be big challenges that
crop up that we haven't seencoming.
But life it is a journey andthat healing is constant.
(41:12):
But we can only learn from eachexperience and hopefully, as we
get older, it gets easier.
That's what I hope anyway.
Speaker 1 (41:23):
Yeah, I don't know.
I think it is a daily thing.
Are there daily rituals thatyou do every single day or that
people can just do sitting attheir desk?
Now I'm thinking probablybreath work, but that are people
just like, wait a second, Ireally need to do this right now
.
And what could they do in orderto stay grounded and connected?
Speaker 2 (41:49):
so breath work is one gratitude.
Three things I'm grateful forthis minute ago, um, and another
one that I don't use this, butit has been recommended to me in
the past and I know for some ofmy clients this works really
well.
So so, in the moment, fivethings that you can one, see,
two, hear, three, touch, four,feel using each of the five
(42:13):
senses.
And that brings you right backto yes, have you done it I have
tried it and it didn't in themoment that I tried it.
The time that I tried it, itdidn't work for me.
For me, it's more the breathwork and the gratitude.
But I have worked with clientsfor who it really works and they
(42:36):
use it all the time, and Ithink that's the other thing.
We have to try these differentthings to figure out what does
work.
And also, sometimes somethingthat works at one time won't
work in another situation.
So I know, like sometimes I lovehaving reflexology done on me,
I absolutely love it, um, butother times I want reiki done on
(43:00):
me and other times I might useacupuncture, and so I know that
they all work.
But I know that over the years,the more that I use them, I
know which scenario they'll workin, and it's only through trial
and error that we can do that.
And the same with some of thesetechniques as well.
Like sometimes it might begratitude and that's that brings
(43:22):
you back to the moment and,yeah, things aren't all bad
because I'm grateful for this,this and this.
Other times it might be a fewdeep breaths and, yeah, having a
toolbox that you learn aboutand develop over time.
Speaker 1 (43:36):
Yeah, I talk about toolboxes all the time, and
sometimes it's just havingsomething to help us reset in
the moment.
You know, and that is soimportant.
That's so much of what you'retalking about here.
With your experience acrossgovernment care, education and
healing, what have you learnedabout people in all of these
(44:00):
different spaces and what do youbelieve stays constant in our
human need for connection andtransformation?
Speaker 2 (44:08):
Ooh, that's a good question.
I think I've noticed over theyears amongst humanity and this
is largely down to media andsocietal expectations I've
noticed there's been an increasemore and more in the need for
instant gratification, likepeople are looking for in things
(44:29):
instantly.
Now they can't wait foranything.
Um, and not only do they wantinstant gratification, they want
validation.
You know social media how manylikes did I get?
How?
Who's watched it?
How many followers have I got?
And material success andfollowers and those kind of
(44:50):
things have become like themarkers of doing well, and
actually they're not the markersof doing well.
Who cares how many followersanybody's got, it doesn't mean
anything.
Um, social media and technologyhave had a massive impact on
those changes and as we livemore and more in the virtual
world, um, social connectionshave changed loneliness and a
(45:14):
lack of community.
They've got a big effect on ourmental health and covid really
exemplified that more thananything and that lack of
community and an increase inselfishness in some ways can
leave a real emptiness in ourlives.
So one of, yeah, working in thegym, we often do like um, we
(45:37):
ask some of our clients a set ofquestions which is designed to
establish their mental, anunderstanding of their mental
health in that moment.
It is very subjective, so itjust gives us a snapshot of how
they're feeling at that time.
But one of the questions thatwe ask is how often have you
been feeling close to otherpeople?
And I can have clients who talkto me fondly about their family
(46:03):
all the way through their gymsessions and they'll tell me
about their children or theirpartner or mum, dad, whoever.
And then I ask that questionand they'll say, oh, rarely or
never.
And I would say that more peoplesay to me that they feel close
to other people rarely than anyother answer, and that really
(46:29):
speaks to me, because we aresupposed to be more connected
than ever before.
Social media means, like I know, when I lived in China, I could
FaceTime my parents back homeand keep in touch with them
every week, and some of myfriends back home.
So really I was connected, Iwas still connected, and we are
(46:51):
more connected than ever before,but yet we feel more lonely
than ever before.
We're becoming more and moredistant from each other.
So I don't know whether that'sa lack of empathy, whether's
feeling overwhelmed with our, sooverwhelmed with our own issues
and our own lives that we can'tthen step, step outside that
and take on board other people'sproblems, or?
(47:12):
I don't know what it is, um,but I do know that we have a
need to be understood and valued, um.
And I think all of this is madeworse when somebody doesn't
understand themselves as anindividual and they don't
realize that they don'tunderstand themselves.
So they might have unresolvedtrauma.
(47:35):
They might be living somebodyelse's expectations of them,
have that self-understanding andthat security in who we are as
an individual is so important inthen being able to connect with
other people and to be therefor other people.
We don't have to solve otherpeople's problems, but just
knowing that there's someone tolisten can make a massive
(47:58):
difference.
But to do this requires us tostep outside of that fear that's
holding us back, and I thinkthat's one of the things that
I've learned.
Speaker 1 (48:12):
You said so much and it was so beautifully said.
I really thank you so much forbeing on.
What a journey you have had,zoe.
You have helped us understand aworld and right now, with what
(48:33):
you just said, you really hadsuch an insight on people and
how we operate.
And I don't know.
I've often thought about whatyou said about we're so
disconnected but yet we'resupposed to be connected and we
(48:54):
are allow ourselves to put well,we didn't have phones.
You know, we're looking at ourphones and we're doing something
else and we're doing so manythings at the same time that
we're not ever really where weare.
Yes, you know, and I think thatit's really unfortunate because
(49:36):
we can't just hit a button andwe're across the world and we're
talking to somebody, like weare now.
No, but in reality,unfortunately, I think that
we're not as much with thepeople that are with us in our
own families and in our owncircles and our own towns than
(49:56):
we used to be and we're just somuch more busy and we're seeking
for so many different things.
You know, when I look at what mychildhood was versus what my
kids' childhood is now, I mean Ialmost feel really bad for them
because it's getting them toput those devices down and be
able to look and sit at a dinnertable and to feel more
(50:18):
connected than we ever.
That we haven't felt in for, Ithink, a decade.
And it's getting worse as thedecades go, unfortunately, in
the more that AI and the morethat the Internet has evolved
into our world, I think thatwe're getting more and more
distant from what we used to beand have really personal,
(50:42):
heartfelt conversations, and Ithink what you're doing with all
these different modalities isyou're bringing people back to
becoming more centered, and Ithink that we're going to need
those things more and more, asthe more these other things are
integrated into our world and wefeel more distanced.
Speaker 2 (51:06):
Yeah, I agree Definitely.
Speaker 1 (51:10):
Well, healing the mind, body and soul is a series
of brave steps, and you areproof of what you can do and you
know.
So many times those are stepsthat no one else sees when we're
doing them and that can make itharder, because it is a choice
(51:33):
that we have to make withinourselves on a regular basis to
become our best self, and I knowyou've personally done a lot of
work.
But you have really taken thisto another level, and so I so
appreciate our conversation.
How can people get a hold ofyou and learn more about how you
can help them and what you aredoing?
Speaker 2 (51:56):
I've got a website, yourvitalitycoachingcom, and
there's loads of information onthere.
There's lots of blogs there,there's information about all of
the services I offer and howthey might work for different
people in different scenarios.
So there's loads of stuff onthere that people can have a
look at and, if they fancygetting in touch, I'm on
(52:18):
Facebook and Instagram andthere's a link to my emails on
the website.
So, yeah, definitely have alook, get in touch and it'd be
really good to chat.
Speaker 1 (52:29):
So people aren't in the UK.
I mean, can they still reachout and ask for help and how can
you do?
Speaker 2 (52:36):
that I do a lot of work over Zoom.
Zoom's been an amazing tool,hasn't it?
It's definitely made the worldsmaller over the last 20 years
or so.
Speaker 1 (52:48):
So it doesn't matter if they're not in the UK, they
can still contact you and askfor help, absolutely.
Yeah.
Well, that's a good thing foryou know, for these types of
situations.
And now we can just like I said, we can just click a button and
there you are and we can say,zoe, I really need you.
Speaker 2 (53:10):
can you teach some of these, like yoga and reiki and
different things, even fromacross the pond, uh-huh yeah,
I'm just in the process ofsetting up an online platform
and because what I'd love to beable to do and it's something
that I actually did when I cameback to the UK first, after
COVID, I used to teach exerciseclasses online and I used to
(53:33):
deliver them through a Facebookgroup, and I had a group of
ladies it was all ladies whoused to come to the classes, and
it changed our lives as a group.
I put myself in there as wellbecause, um, we built a
community and you know what,over the last couple of months,
I've been downloading thosevideos off off that platform,
(53:56):
off Facebook, to put up onto myonline platform and to grow from
there.
And looking back at thecomments on all of the videos
and looking back at the videos,it's really made me realize what
a community we built and howsupportive everyone was of each
other.
And then, looking at where theladies went, um, when I, when I,
stopped doing those classes,and life changed.
(54:18):
We all got on with other thingsand, uh, one of those ladies
has recently been to spain tocompete in a high rocks
competition, and so, you know,they carried on Everybody's
carried on their journeys.
And so, yeah, I'm in theprocess now of setting up an
online platform to take myclasses back online and that
(54:39):
will be open right around theworld.
The Internet is our worldwidewebsite.
I'm hoping to build a communityonline and make it
international.
That would be amazing.
Speaker 1 (54:52):
So yeah, that'll be one way okay, well, for anybody
that's listening, I mean, shareit, get the word out there and
you can go to her website andyou can absolutely check her out
and contact her.
That would be amazing.
Now, as we always say at RealTalk with Tina and Anne, there
is purpose in the pain and thereis hope in the journey.
(55:14):
Every step we take is astepping stone to where we are
going.
Thank you for being here.
Thank you.
(55:36):
I keep yeah, keep growing, keeppushing pause when you need to,
and always remember that you cangive yourself permission to
pivot and start again.
You are a soul.
You have a body, and I've neverreally thought about that
before.
That really hit me when I readit.
So that's pretty powerful andit's also the reason why, like
(55:57):
Buddha said, to keep the body ingood health is a duty,
otherwise we shall not be ableto keep our mind strong and
clear.
And I want to leave you withthis.
Plato said the part can neverbe well unless the whole is well
.
So please share this episodewith someone.
(56:18):
Let people know about Zoe Smithand your vitality coaching as
usual.
We will see you next time.
Welcome back to part two of our conversation with the
incredible Zoe Smith, with yourVitality Coaching.
If you caught the first episode, you already know her story is
one of radical transformation,stepping away from a
high-powered career to fullyembracing a path of healing and
wholeness.
We're going to dig into somepretty big questions.
(00:29):
How do we move through fear toreach success?
What does it truly mean to healthe whole self, and how can
small rituals create massiveshifts in our emotional and
physical well-being?
Zoe's also going to open upabout who she is today, after
pressing pause in her life, whatsurprised her most about that
journey and how she now helpsothers reconnect with themselves
(00:52):
through powerful healingmodalities like QHHT, reiki,
sound therapy, yoga, body combatand actually being a life coach
.
The conversation is honest,uplifting and filled with
practical wisdom, so let's jumpin.
I've reinvented myself many,many times and I really believe
(01:12):
in constantly evolving.
You are the poster person forreinventing yourself, I think,
and I think we have to giveourselves permission many times
in order to do that.
What have you learned abouttransformation and what gives
you the courage to keep evolvinginto new, into new versions of
(01:36):
yourself?
Speaker 2 (01:38):
yeah, I asked.
Yeah, I haven't.
I have, um, transformed manytimes, not intentionally, but I
think it's part of life'sjourney, and I think my current
boss has a saying, and I thinkhe got it from George Adair.
George Adair's famous quote iseverything that you want is on
the other side of fear, and myboss translated that to and he
(02:02):
uses it in his fitness classessometimes to motivate people,
and he'll say um, the magichappens on the other side of the
stuff that you don't want to do.
Well, actually, both of both ofthose are absolutely spot on,
because the stuff that we finddifficult, the stuff we're
scared of, the stuff that wedon't want to do, we have to
(02:24):
overcome that in order to movein order to transform and
develop.
And when I think back, likemoving from England to China, I
remember I packed my house up, Igave most of my belongings away
or I sold them, and I headedoff to China with two suitcases
(02:44):
and no real plan.
I knew that I wanted to livethere, I knew I wanted to work
and I knew I wanted to travel.
That was my plan.
I had no idea how long I wasgoing for, um, if I would have
known that covid was going tobreak out, I think I'd have gone
five years sooner, but anyway,um.
So yeah, was that scary?
Yes, but I didn't focus on thefear.
(03:07):
I focused on what I reallywanted to achieve.
And if I would have been frozenin the fear, I would have never
done it.
Fear out of the way, accept it,acknowledge it.
(03:28):
But we still have to to keepgoing, don't we?
Otherwise we remain stuck andthat is a choice.
Speaker 1 (03:31):
That's something else , it is a choice.
Speaker 2 (03:32):
It's a choice.
None of us are rooted to thespot.
We've all got choice.
That choice might not be niceand it might not be a welcome
choice.
It might be hard to make, butit's a choice and yeah, and so
evolving and I don't think a lotof us realize or feel, see that
choice.
Speaker 1 (03:51):
We don't.
You know a lot of people reallydon't see themselves being able
to go through the fear, get tothe other side, because success
or whatever you really want isreally on the other side and you
, you know fear is a lie, youknow most of the things that are
standing in between us andwhatever we want to achieve
(04:12):
isn't really even going tohappen.
And we have to allow ourselvesto just forge through, no matter
what.
But I mean, it is really hardbecause it is a big block and
it's being able to push throughthat mountain or whatever it is
(04:34):
that stand in between us andwherever we want to be, and just
allow ourselves to succeed.
Speaker 2 (04:40):
Yeah, it's having the courage.
Isn't it being brave?
Yeah, it's having the courage.
Speaker 1 (04:44):
Isn't it being brave?
Yes, taking that leap, yeah, Ilike those words From that crazy
life that you led before acouple of different times.
It sounds like to who you aretoday because you are a much
more grounded person.
How different are you todayfrom that person that had to
(05:04):
pause for that five months?
Speaker 2 (05:08):
Oh, completely different.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm muchcalmer, I'm much more laid back,
incredibly flexible.
I'm organized in a flexiblekind of a way, so I'm still
organized.
I like that.
To the outside person lookinginto my life, it might look a
(05:33):
bit chaotic, whereas in the pastit would have looked very
organized and disciplined.
I'm still organized anddisciplined, but I am a lot more
more laid back with it.
Um, okay, I tend to be late fora lot of things nowadays, to be
honest.
Speaker 1 (05:51):
and um, I'm not very late, but maybe five minutes
late and okay well, you're busy,just needing that extra five
minutes to take care of yourself.
Speaker 2 (06:02):
Yeah, yeah, and I don't mind about that now and I
will tell people.
In fact, we were talking aboutpronouns the other day and how
people are using pronouns and Isaid mine are almost there.
I identify as late.
My pronouns are almost there.
That's awesome.
Oh, I love that.
(06:24):
I think, alongside all that,I've grown in confidence a lot.
I'm very happy and comfortablein my own skin and with who I am
, Whereas in the past thatwasn't always the case and I
think it really made me think.
A few weeks ago I covered anaqua class and so I was there on
the side of the pool doing mything and motivating everyone
(06:45):
and shouting and getting up, andin the class there was a lady
who had come to say hi at thebeginning and I haven't seen her
for years and she's my friend,who I went to school with.
It's her mom, and I haven'tseen my friend for years and I
haven't seen her mom for years.
So we were reminiscing a littlebit.
And then she got in the pooland I started the class and
partway through the class I'mlike come on everybody, how are
(07:07):
we feeling?
And she said Zoe, you used tobe so quiet and shy and a nice
person and now you're justbullying me.
Speaker 1 (07:16):
Oh, my goodness.
Speaker 2 (07:18):
And it really made me laugh because I thought, yeah,
I am completely different now tohow I would have been when she
knew me back at school.
Speaker 1 (07:27):
Well, a beautiful transformation.
Anything surprise you aboutyour journey learning about
yourself, Everything.
Speaker 2 (07:35):
Yeah, I love seeing how things unfold.
I love seeing the magic of theuniverse.
I love seeing the miracles andthe synchronicities and things
that life throws at us.
That there's no.
I believe there's no such thingas a coincidence.
I believe that everybody, andeverything that happens is for a
(07:56):
reason, and that reason mightbe a lesson where we learn
something, or it could be ablessing, where you're feeling
desperate about something andthen suddenly something happens
and it changes it all.
And I am always surprised bylife and I embrace those
surprises.
I look forward to see, like,where things go and I'm a really
(08:18):
big believer in trying thingsand seeing what happens.
I love that.
Speaker 1 (08:23):
Yeah, I believe in exposure for my kids.
I mean it's just being exposedto everything and being open.
I mean that's really important.
Now talk about being open aboutdifferent things.
You now offer a powerful rangeof modalities.
You have so much experience.
(08:44):
You offer the QHHT, which youtalked about, the quantum
healing, hypnosis technique,which we will talk about.
These things Reiki, yoga, soundtherapy, coaching, even body
combat, which I found reallyinteresting.
How do you determine whatsomeone needs and how do you
help people recognize wherethey're out of balance, either
(09:07):
mentally, emotionally,physically or spiritually?
Speaker 2 (09:11):
yeah, that's an interesting question, um,
because I learned a long timeago, um, that you can't force
your help on other people.
So some so you can easily lookat someone else's life and say,
oh, you should be doing this,you should try that.
But we all know that whenpeople do that for us, we often
(09:31):
don't listen.
We have to figure that out forourselves.
So really early on in mycoaching I realized even though
I thought I knew what peopleneeded then that wasn't the
approach that I should be taking.
So I focus a lot on askingquestions.
I am nosy and I ask lots ofquestions, and I really love
getting to know my clients,whether that's in the gym doing
(09:54):
exercise, rehab, or whether it'ssomeone who comes for Reiki,
and then we get chatting andlook at other things that will
help in their life.
So I ask a lot of um, and itdoes depend a lot on the
scenario.
I recently had um a chap come tome who'd lost mobility due to a
spinal injury, so so I was sortof trying to understand what it
(10:17):
was that he was wanting toachieve, and I'm making
suggestions to him about what wecould do and everything that I
suggested.
He came up with a negative.
Oh well, no, that won't workbecause.
Oh well, I tried that and thatdidn't work.
And oh no, I'm not so sureabout that.
So this had gone on for aboutfive or 10 minutes and in the
end I put my clipboard down andsat back in my chair and I just
(10:38):
went.
So what is it you do want?
Why are you here?
And I can come across as bluntand direct I can be blunt and
direct sometimes so he sort ofhe looked at me and sort of
stopped and he thought for aminute and then he answered and
then we carried on from there.
So he'd been coming to the gymfor a number of weeks and he'd
(11:00):
made some really good progress.
And I commented on his progressone day and I said wow, look how
far you've come.
Well done with this.
And he said well, it's all you.
And I said it's not all me.
I said it's all down to you.
You're the one who's put thework in.
He went no, no, it's all you,zoe.
And I said how is it me?
And he said well, you asked methat question when we first met
(11:22):
and I'd forgotten about this.
And I said which question wasthat?
And he said well, he said youjust stopped and looked at me
and went well, what is it you dowant?
And he said I hadn't actuallythought about that.
And he said I realized what youmeant and it made me think.
And he said I went home afterthat and I was thinking what do
(11:43):
I actually want, want?
And so sometimes it's aboutasking the right question, which
sometimes I get right andsometimes I don't, but then from
there working with that personto put things in place.
So that chap as well was veryclosed to alternative therapies
when I first met him.
I asked him in that firstmeeting are you open to
alternative therapies?
(12:04):
Because that's what I willusually say to people, to
quickly determine whether or notit's something they would be
willing to consider.
And he, his response was prettymuch no, um, and so I moved on
to my next question and justdismissed that.
And then he mentioned to meabout somebody that he knew who
was a Reiki master, and he wassort of laughing about it and
(12:27):
and saying you know, I don'tthink that.
What a load of rubbish.
And I said, oh, a reiki master.
Yes, I'm a reiki master.
And he went oh, oh and uh and Isaid but don't worry, I said I
won't, I won't mention it withyou because I can see that it's
not for you.
And then, because he got toknow me a little bit by that
point, then he was intriguedbecause he his sort of
(12:49):
perception of me and how we'dwork together.
But then he then he's realizingthat I'm doing other things as
well and he's suddenly intriguedand uh, and now he's having
Reiki and it's making a reallybig difference to his life.
So it can be a journey workingwith other people, and I've
really realized it has to bevery step-by-step and it has to
(13:11):
be led by them and I'm justthere to make suggestions, ask
questions, get them thinking.
Speaker 1 (13:18):
Sure, because it really is about them getting to
know themselves.
It is yeah, and they've got towant to.
Yeah, helping them help it isyeah, and they've got to want to
.
Yeah, helping them helpthemselves Exactly yeah.
But I have a few questionsabout what exactly some of these
things are, because I have noidea what QHHT is and how it
(13:39):
supports deep healing.
So if you could talk a littlebit about that, Because it vast.
Speaker 2 (13:46):
So I'll just I'll give us okay.
Speaker 1 (13:47):
In a nutshell, for the lay person who has no clue
what it is.
Speaker 2 (13:53):
So.
It was developed by the late umdolores cannon, um, who was an
american lady, and she worked onon the technique over a 40-year
career and sort of found it byaccident working with
hypnotherapy, and theneventually it evolved into what
(14:16):
we now know and love as QHHT ofhypnotherapy, where you take the
person back in time, regressthem back to wherever their
higher self or subconscioustakes them.
Now that might be a past lifeor it might be earlier in their
current life.
It'll be somewhere in time thatthey that will be directly
(14:43):
relevant to whatever issuesgoing on in their life now.
So it's it's a complex, yetsimple at the same time process.
Um, so I've had it done on me,because when I was training to
become a practitioner, um, arequirement is that you have it
done on you so that because ifyou've not had that experience,
(15:06):
you can't understand it and howit might play out for other
people.
So in my session I was takenback to a past life and in that
past life I was able to describewhat was going on and why and
how I was feeling, and we wentright through that past life up
to the point of death and thenmoved into what happens after
(15:29):
death.
So even if somebody'sexperienced something truly
horrific, say like being burntat the stake or if they drowned
or something horrific, theydon't feel that.
So you can take them throughthe experience without them
feeling any of that.
So it's all safe.
But it can help resolve anyhistorical unresolved trauma.
(15:53):
It can help you understand anyemotional pain that you're
dealing with or physical painSometimes, when we've got
physical health conditions inthis life.
Sometimes that can be linkedwith a past life.
Sometimes it can be somethingthat our higher self or our soul
has chosen for us to experiencein this life and we just have
(16:14):
to go through that because it'sone of our lessons.
So then, once you've gonethrough your past life safely,
we will then meet with thesubconscious and we will.
At that point you can ask thesubconscious any questions you
want the answers to.
So I sat down before my sessionand I think I had two a4 sides
(16:35):
of questions.
You can ask about anything.
You can ask about anythingthat's happened in your life.
You can ask tough questions.
You're going through at thetime all sorts about your life
and you get the answers andduring that same segment of of
the healing, if you have anyphysical ailments that you would
(16:58):
like to understand why you'vegot them or how you can work
through them, you can also askfor healing and if it's
appropriate for that conditionto be healed, then the
subconscious will step in andheal the body.
So as a practitioner, I havedone a number of sessions where
people have had healing, butthere's always one that sticks
(17:20):
in my mind and it was for agentleman who had had a spinal
injury.
He'd had several spinaloperations and he had QHHT with
me and during the healing partwe asked for healing for his
spine and I could see his bodymoving independently.
I wasn't touching him I don'tneed to touch during qhht, um,
(17:40):
and his body was just movingindependently, twitching and
moving, and his spine wasrealigning and healing.
And at the end of that sessionover the next couple of weeks,
the more you you get a recordingof your session and the more
you listen to it before you fallasleep, the more healing comes
through, because you're in thatdeeply relaxed state and whilst
(18:01):
you're having the hypnotherapyyou're in a deeply relaxed state
.
So when you're in that deepstate of relaxation, that is
when the body can heal itselfand he was able to go back to
playing football with his son,which he'd never done for years,
and he had been asemi-professional boxer before
he'd had his injury.
He went back and had anothersemi-professional fight after
(18:24):
that and he'd been in agony foryears and yet he was able to get
healing.
And I know when I, when I hadmine, I'd asked for healing on
my spine because I'd been havinglow back problems and I and I
had a similar experience wheremy body just I could feel it.
I could feel my body moving asI was lying there, because
(18:45):
you're in a deeply relaxed statebut you're still aware of
what's going on around you.
It's, um, it's a an amazingexperience.
Incredible.
Yeah, yeah, it doesn't healeverything.
So, for example, I my eyesightis terrible I've got really long
eyesight and I'd asked forhealing on my eyes as well that
(19:06):
that didn't come through, whichmeans for me that's obviously
before I came into this life,that's something that my soul
had chosen for me, so I'm notmeant to have good eyesight in
this life, but yet my spineproblems were resolved.
So, yeah, it is amazing.
(19:27):
Wow, could you talk a little bitabout Reiki, because I
personally I know a little bitabout it, but for our listeners
just explain it a little bitplease so Reiki is a Japanese
form of healing and well, comesfrom Japan and it's working with
the universal life force,energy, which is the energy that
(19:49):
we've all got inside us andthat we all share, and it's what
links us all with the universe.
That energy has no beginningand no end.
It changes form and changesshape, um, and so with reiki I
work as a channel.
I I work between your energyand the energy from the universe
(20:10):
and I am just a channel tochannel healing energy to, to
your body.
So I work over the body in theenergy field.
I don't all.
I occasionally I'll put myhands on the body, but not very
often.
I usually work above the energyfield or on the aura and I am
just channeling energy to thebody.
Now I can sense through myhands, as I'm doing that, where
(20:34):
healing is needed, um, and I cansense where there's blockages
in people's energy and Reikijust works to.
It puts you into that deeplyrelaxed state where your body
can heal itself, and then it'sjust working with that energy to
realign it, to remove anyblocks, to balance your energy.
(20:56):
I work over the chakras.
We've got seven main chakrapoints down our body, from the
crown of our head to the tip ofour tailbone.
I'll work over those points.
But I'll also work on otherareas of the body as well, and
I've had some amazingexperiences.
Reiki works on a body, mind andsoul level, so the healing goes
(21:19):
wherever your higher selfdetermines you need it.
So somebody might come to mewith really bad pain in their
knee, but they've also beengoing through a heavily
emotional time, and so thehealing will go purely to their
emotions, which can be verysubtle, and not the knee, and
then they'll say to me oh, itdidn't work.
And then I have to then coaxout of them like what else is
(21:44):
going on?
Where else might it have gone?
Have you been feeling anydifferently in yourself?
And then they'll say oh well,I've been feeling a bit calmer.
Oh well, there we go.
Um.
So sometimes it can be verysubtle and you have to take a
step back, go, hang on a minute.
The healing's gone somewhere,because it always does.
So where has it gone?
And then once.
So if somebody is going throughan emotional or stressful time
(22:08):
and they get that healing there,then if they come back for more
Reiki, then it may well then goto the painful knee or wherever
else it's needed.
So it's body, mind and soul andyou don't get to choose, and I
don't get to choose where thatgoes, but your higher self does.
But then, on the other hand,I've had clients who have come
(22:28):
to me and can't walk without astick and after a few sessions
of Reiki they're walking withouta stick and thinking of going
back to ballroom dancing, andit's amazing.
It's absolutely amazing.
It's like magic to me and Inever get sick of it.
I just love to see how it works.
Speaker 1 (22:46):
Oh my gosh.
So in a way, I mean, eventhough your healthcare system
has turned into what it is andpeople are going to alternative
ways of healing, it seems likeyou know that's a good thing.
Speaker 2 (22:59):
I think so.
I think we've all got the powerwithin us to heal and to heal
each other.
This isn't a special skill.
I've got that no one else hasgot.
I've just tapped intounderstanding, energy healing
and now I'm doing it and we'veall got that ability.
We've been born with, with thatability, but we're not told
(23:19):
about it and we're not taughthow to use it and we've all
forgotten about it as a as arace.
We've forgotten about it and Ithink if we could all just
remember that and tap into itand if we were all doing it, how
amazing would life be.
We wouldn't need it, would besome of the pharmaceuticals and
(23:39):
things like that.
Speaker 1 (23:41):
Yeah, it would definitely be different, and I
think that those things are well.
Yeah, I think that a lot ofthose medicines are killing us,
so so do I, so do I yeah,they're not designed.
Speaker 2 (23:53):
I did read something the other day about one of the
large pharmaceutical companiesand how they'd been around for a
certain amount of time and inthat time they've hardly healed
anyone, and I thought, yeah,they're not designed to heal.
They've put all that investmentinto research and the latest
technology and yet actuallypeople are still sick oh yeah
(24:13):
yeah, I think the ancientcivilizations understood all
this.
they used to use it egypt, theMayans, so many of them and it's
got lost in time.
But it's got lost for a reason.
It's been hidden from us for areason so that we're more easily
controlled, because we've gotall this ability and it's
(24:36):
important we get it back.
Speaker 1 (24:39):
I really want to know this what is body combat?
Speaker 2 (24:43):
It's an exercise class.
It's part of the Les Millsclasses.
It's one of their programs.
It's been really popular.
It's been around for a longtime and I've been instructing
body combat classes for a fewyears now.
So it's all set to music andit's using different combat
moves.
So you might be punching or alldifferent types of punches and
(25:06):
then kicks, and it's allthreaded together through
choreography and there's usuallyabout 10 tracks in an hour's
class and you'll cover all thedifferent types of martial art
within a class and it's intense.
You can take it down to yourlevel, um, but no matter what
your level is, if you're workinghard in class you are sweating.
(25:26):
Is it like zumba kind of, inthat it's a cardio class and
you'll work hard and sweat.
Speaker 1 (25:34):
Yeah well, I used to work out all the time.
I do treadmill and things likethat.
I'm I am constantly moving, uh.
But that is something that I'mreally interested in doing is
high intensive, either dance orsome kind of an exercise like
that.
So I really believe in that.
(25:55):
That's because I mean you haveto keep moving.
Speaker 2 (25:58):
You have to Absolutely Use it or lose it.
Yeah, oh, 100%.
What do you do as a life coach?
As a life coach, my lifecoaching kind of threads
together all of the above in away.
So it may be that somebodywants to set some goals and make
a plan for the future, butthey're not really sure how to
(26:20):
set the goals, or they're notsure how to work towards them,
or they need someone to keepthem accountable.
So it might be that that's myrole there.
Or it might be that to improvetheir lifestyle and put some
measures in place to improvetheir health or fitness, and
we'll work through techniquesaround that.
Or it could be relationshipissues or um, career issues or
(26:46):
or anything really that's partof life.
So it's vast um, and it's givingdifferent strategies,
techniques, um, and helping themunpick any blockages they may
have and helping them thinkthrough the consequences of not
doing something and realizingthey've got a choice and whether
(27:07):
they choose to make that changeand how.
So it can be quite powerful.
It's an opportunity for someoneto take a step back, gain that
perspective in order to thenstep forward.
It can be um really interesting.
I've and I'm starting to workwith more young people.
I think covid's got had animpact on our young people.
(27:30):
They they were going throughcovid in their formative years,
whereas it was hard enough forus as adults to go through those
changes but, yeah, for childrento go through them, that's had
lasting effects on a lot of ourour young people, and so I've
been working with some youngpeople looking at coping
(27:51):
strategies, um breathingtechniques, helping them realize
they have choices and whatthose choices look like, and
that's been quite interesting aswell.
Speaker 1 (28:06):
Do you think that we underestimate how connected our
emotional health is to ourphysical well-being, and how do
you guide clients through thatconnection in your practice?
Speaker 2 (28:20):
I think we do underestimate that massively
because the breath is one of ourbiggest links in our body.
Our breath links us directlywith our parasympathetic nervous
system, which is the system inour body that calms us us.
So when we're at stress orwe're feeling there's an
(28:41):
emergency or something like that, we're in our fight or flight.
Uh okay, pathetic nervoussystem, cortisol levels are high
, we're ready to go, but we'reonly designed to be in that
space for very short periods todeal with those emergencies.
However, the pace of modernlife means that more and more
people are in that heightenedzone with raised cortisol levels
(29:02):
for long periods of time.
And unless you're aware andunless you're thinking about how
to lower those cortisol levelsagain, then it can actually have
lasting effects.
It can be responsible for heartconditions, diabetes, all sorts
of different physicalconditions, and it's really
(29:23):
simple to employ some verysimple breathing techniques and
the breath connects us straightaway with that parasympathetic
nervous system, which reducesthose cortisol levels back down,
make us feel calm, makes usfeel peaceful, gives us our
clarity and our focus and ourvision back, which we lose when
we're up here all the timebecause we're feeling
(29:45):
overwhelmed, we're on edge andwe can't select.
So we massively underestimatethat as a nation, as as a world.
Um, in modern life, technologyis great.
Technology is amazing.
It's made all sorts of changesto our lives for the better, but
it's also made a lot of changesto our lives that have not been
(30:06):
for the best, and I think wehave to learn how to use
technology better, how to regaina balance and a pace of life.
And so, yeah, breathworktechniques are something I use
with a lot of my clients,whether that's through yoga I've
(30:27):
introduced it into some of myexercise classes in the
cool-down section I try andeducate my clients using
breathwork in the gym.
Again, I've had real successworking with some of my younger
clients, um, introducing breathwork techniques to them, um, and
explaining why.
(30:47):
Because if you just say to topeople, it'll calm you down.
Sometimes they're like no, yeah, I don't see how that's going
to help.
But when you explain thescience behind it from to do it
with you, they're like oh, yeah,actually I do feel calm now.
Speaker 1 (31:03):
Um, it's so powerful, and so these things can
actually lower cortisol.
Yeah, without having to takesome of these prescribed
medications to lower cortisolyeah, you're doing breath work.
Speaker 2 (31:19):
You know in the moment when you're feeling
anxious, or at night, if youcan't settle and if you just
follow a few simple breath worktechniques.
One of my favorite is I justshut my eyes and I'll breathe in
to the count of three, out tothe count of three.
Now, that means that I'm havingto focus on my breath and I'm
counting.
So whilst I'm focusing on mybreath and I'm counting, I'm not
(31:42):
able to do anything else.
I'm not able to think aboutwhat it was that was stressing
me out the second before or anyof those things.
So breathe in for three, out forthree, do that for three or
four rounds, and then I'llbreathe in for three, out for
four.
So I'm slowly lengthening thatexhale and I'll do that for
three or four rounds and then Ibreathe in for three, out for
(32:05):
five.
Now I've really lengthened thatexhale and I'll sit with that
until I start to feel peacefuland I just sit and count, and
then I'll bring it back downthree and four, and then I bring
it back down three and threeand by the time I've done that
and it might only take and four,and then I bring it back down
three and three, and by the timeI've done that and it might
only take two minutes, by thetime I've done that, whatever it
was that was stressing me out aminute before I've forgotten,
(32:31):
I'm feeling calm and I'm readyto go again.
Speaker 1 (32:32):
That's powerful Massively.
I've got two kids who wentthrough a lot of trauma before I
adopted them and their cortisollevels are high, so that's
really interesting.
I am definitely going to lookinto that with them.
Speaker 2 (32:52):
Do that with them, and there's loads of different
exercises, um, and some willappeal to people, to individuals
, more than others, and so it'sworth trying different ones
until you find one that worksfor them.
But I think the practice ofdoing it, the calmness that they
will feel as they do it andafter it, just really opens your
(33:16):
eyes to a simple technique thatcan really help.
Speaker 1 (33:20):
Well, that's one thing, possibly for someone
who's brand new to things likeenergy healing and yoga.
Where do you suggest they start?
I mean the breath work oranywhere else?
Speaker 2 (33:33):
Breath work's a really good place to start.
People struggle with meditationat first, um, because usually
the usually when we needmeditation in the moment, it's
when our head is so busy andfull of chatter, and, and that
can be when it's hard tomeditate.
And I find that breath work isreally good because if you're
(33:57):
counting in the way that I wasjust talking about, for example,
then you can only focus oncounting and breath, so you've
got one single point of focus,which is what helps with calming
the mind.
So breath work's a really goodway to start.
Sometimes, when you'vepracticed breath work a little
(34:18):
bit, you can then move intomeditation, and breath work is a
good way into meditationbecause you've calmed yourself.
Then you can meditate.
Um, yoga can help some people ifthey um, some of us have got a
lot of energy and can't sitstill and just sitting down to
do breath work is hard in itself.
(34:39):
So yoga does the same thing,but you're moving, so you're
moving into a pose and you mightinhale one way, exhale down,
whatever that pose is, but againyou're focusing on the movement
, the body and the breath, andso it's a single point of focus
again.
And then another one that Ilike is the sound therapy a
(35:01):
single point of focus again, andthen another one that I like is
the sound therapy.
So for sound healing, I'll getpeople to lay on the floor in a
really comfy position for them.
They might have blankets andsleeping bag, whatever to make
them feel really comfy, and thenthey just lay there and listen
to the sound.
So again, listening to thesounds, and there'll be
different sounds at differentfrequencies, and that helps put
(35:21):
you into that relaxed state onceagain, and then that's when you
can really calm the mind andthe body starts to heal itself.
So I think those are three of myfavorites because they're
accessible for most people.
One of them will appeal more toeach individual than another,
but they're a way intorelaxation, um, where people can
(35:44):
just relax, and often peoplewill say to me oh, I can't do
yoga, because when I was doingthis, all I was thinking about
was that.
And I said to them right, okay,so instead of letting your mind
wander, bring it back.
What are you doing with yourbody at that time?
How is your body aligned?
How are you breathing?
(36:04):
Are you aligning your breathwith your movement?
And there's no where for themind to go when you're fully in
the moment.
But being fully in the momentis hard sometimes in modern life
.
Speaker 1 (36:17):
It sounds like the mind might be one of our biggest
barriers.
I would think so.
I mean, are there any reallybig barriers that you see with?
Because you've seen peoplestuck, lost, disconnected, and
what would you say?
Some of the biggest barriersare that hold people back.
Speaker 2 (36:40):
The mind is one of our most powerful tools.
Yeah, the power of the mind isphenomenal, but, yeah, it can,
equally as much as it can be oneof our most powerful tools for
taking us forward, it can alsobe a powerful tool in holding us
back.
And that couples up with someof the expectations that we
place on ourselves that areunreasonable, the expectations
(37:03):
that society places on us orthat we feel society might be
placing on us.
Some of the traditions whatwill your family think, what's
your family expect from you?
All of those things, extrapressures that we put on
ourselves.
Keeping up with material wantspeople place um success on what
(37:25):
they own sometimes, and thenbeing able to achieve having
that house, that car, thatholiday, whatever it, oh,
whatever it is.
For you people, that can be abarrier.
Yeah, feeling trapped andtrying to live someone else's
dreams for your life.
Sometimes people are so focusedon living other people's dreams
(37:46):
they don't even realize they'redoing it, and then they don't
know what their dreams actuallyare, and it isn't until years
down the line.
Sometimes people say I've beenliving his life, or I've been
living her life, I've been doingwhat my mum wanted and, and now
she's gone and I don't knowwhat I want, and that's really
(38:07):
sad, because we've all got thechoice and stepping outside of
those expectations that we puton ourselves or that we feel are
put on us, um, is it'simportant, it's really important
, to be able to do that.
So I think one of the biggestthings is is being able to
identify what brings you joy um,some people don't know what
(38:30):
brings them joy and to be, ableto, to know what it is that
brings you joy and then to maketime for it.
Um, and when we feel that joy,it brings us back to a state of
peace in itself, um, we'refeeling happy doing whatever it
is that brings us joy.
We're joyful while we're doingit and that helps us to think
(38:51):
clearly and it gives us the timeto do it.
So we've set aside some time todo something we love and it can
be so therapeutic.
But making time can be the hardthing, can't it?
Um, stepping back and andreally reflecting on on on
things it can.
(39:11):
That can be the hardest thing.
Speaker 1 (39:12):
Prioritizing ourselves oh, that is so
important and I hear you sayoften is that it's just finding
something that brings you backto center.
And you know it's sometimesbecause my life is really crazy.
It's sitting down and putting apuzzle together or painting or
(39:34):
drawing, because I love doingthose kinds of things, or
getting out in nature and doingmy photography that I love.
You know it's really importantthat we have to do those things
in the crazy.
Now, in your view, what does itreally mean to heal the whole
(39:56):
self, and do you think that weever can really reach that?
Speaker 2 (40:02):
I think it's an ongoing process.
I think we can heal the wholeself, but it's not a do it once,
done forever, and I think thewhole healing process happens.
I often describe it as likepeeling an onion so you peel
away a layer of healing and youdeal with it and you feel good,
(40:26):
and then life carries on andthen something else happens and
it triggers the memory or anemotion, or there's a situation
that's got out of hand, or, andthen you peel away that layer
and you heal it and you throw itaway and life moves on and it's
a constant journey.
But as we go through thatjourney, if we are taking the
time to understand ourselves, tolearn about ourselves, to
(40:50):
figure out what brings us backto our center, to understand
what brings us joy, to learnfrom our mistakes, then as we go
through life, peeling thoselayers and dealing with them
gets easier.
Each time, or sometimesthere'll be big challenges that
crop up that we haven't seencoming.
But life it is a journey andthat healing is constant.
(41:12):
But we can only learn from eachexperience and hopefully, as we
get older, it gets easier.
That's what I hope anyway.
Speaker 1 (41:23):
Yeah, I don't know.
I think it is a daily thing.
Are there daily rituals thatyou do every single day or that
people can just do sitting attheir desk?
Now I'm thinking probablybreath work, but that are people
just like, wait a second, Ireally need to do this right now
.
And what could they do in orderto stay grounded and connected?
Speaker 2 (41:49):
so breath work is one gratitude.
Three things I'm grateful forthis minute ago, um, and another
one that I don't use this, butit has been recommended to me in
the past and I know for some ofmy clients this works really
well.
So so, in the moment, fivethings that you can one, see,
two, hear, three, touch, four,feel using each of the five
(42:13):
senses.
And that brings you right backto yes, have you done it I have
tried it and it didn't in themoment that I tried it.
The time that I tried it, itdidn't work for me.
For me, it's more the breathwork and the gratitude.
But I have worked with clientsfor who it really works and they
(42:36):
use it all the time, and Ithink that's the other thing.
We have to try these differentthings to figure out what does
work.
And also, sometimes somethingthat works at one time won't
work in another situation.
So I know, like sometimes I lovehaving reflexology done on me,
I absolutely love it, um, butother times I want reiki done on
(43:00):
me and other times I might useacupuncture, and so I know that
they all work.
But I know that over the years,the more that I use them, I
know which scenario they'll workin, and it's only through trial
and error that we can do that.
And the same with some of thesetechniques as well.
Like sometimes it might begratitude and that's that brings
(43:22):
you back to the moment and,yeah, things aren't all bad
because I'm grateful for this,this and this.
Other times it might be a fewdeep breaths and, yeah, having a
toolbox that you learn aboutand develop over time.
Speaker 1 (43:36):
Yeah, I talk about toolboxes all the time, and
sometimes it's just havingsomething to help us reset in
the moment.
You know, and that is soimportant.
That's so much of what you'retalking about here.
With your experience acrossgovernment care, education and
healing, what have you learnedabout people in all of these
(44:00):
different spaces and what do youbelieve stays constant in our
human need for connection andtransformation?
Speaker 2 (44:08):
Ooh, that's a good question.
I think I've noticed over theyears amongst humanity and this
is largely down to media andsocietal expectations I've
noticed there's been an increasemore and more in the need for
instant gratification, likepeople are looking for in things
(44:29):
instantly.
Now they can't wait foranything.
Um, and not only do they wantinstant gratification, they want
validation.
You know social media how manylikes did I get?
How?
Who's watched it?
How many followers have I got?
And material success andfollowers and those kind of
(44:50):
things have become like themarkers of doing well, and
actually they're not the markersof doing well.
Who cares how many followersanybody's got, it doesn't mean
anything.
Um, social media and technologyhave had a massive impact on
those changes and as we livemore and more in the virtual
world, um, social connectionshave changed loneliness and a
(45:14):
lack of community.
They've got a big effect on ourmental health and covid really
exemplified that more thananything and that lack of
community and an increase inselfishness in some ways can
leave a real emptiness in ourlives.
So one of, yeah, working in thegym, we often do like um, we
(45:37):
ask some of our clients a set ofquestions which is designed to
establish their mental, anunderstanding of their mental
health in that moment.
It is very subjective, so itjust gives us a snapshot of how
they're feeling at that time.
But one of the questions thatwe ask is how often have you
been feeling close to otherpeople?
And I can have clients who talkto me fondly about their family
(46:03):
all the way through their gymsessions and they'll tell me
about their children or theirpartner or mum, dad, whoever.
And then I ask that questionand they'll say, oh, rarely or
never.
And I would say that more peoplesay to me that they feel close
to other people rarely than anyother answer, and that really
(46:29):
speaks to me, because we aresupposed to be more connected
than ever before.
Social media means, like I know, when I lived in China, I could
FaceTime my parents back homeand keep in touch with them
every week, and some of myfriends back home.
So really I was connected, Iwas still connected, and we are
(46:51):
more connected than ever before,but yet we feel more lonely
than ever before.
We're becoming more and moredistant from each other.
So I don't know whether that'sa lack of empathy, whether's
feeling overwhelmed with our, sooverwhelmed with our own issues
and our own lives that we can'tthen step, step outside that
and take on board other people'sproblems, or?
(47:12):
I don't know what it is, um,but I do know that we have a
need to be understood and valued, um.
And I think all of this is madeworse when somebody doesn't
understand themselves as anindividual and they don't
realize that they don'tunderstand themselves.
So they might have unresolvedtrauma.
(47:35):
They might be living somebodyelse's expectations of them,
have that self-understanding andthat security in who we are as
an individual is so important inthen being able to connect with
other people and to be therefor other people.
We don't have to solve otherpeople's problems, but just
knowing that there's someone tolisten can make a massive
(47:58):
difference.
But to do this requires us tostep outside of that fear that's
holding us back, and I thinkthat's one of the things that
I've learned.
Speaker 1 (48:12):
You said so much and it was so beautifully said.
I really thank you so much forbeing on.
What a journey you have had,zoe.
You have helped us understand aworld and right now, with what
(48:33):
you just said, you really hadsuch an insight on people and
how we operate.
And I don't know.
I've often thought about whatyou said about we're so
disconnected but yet we'resupposed to be connected and we
(48:54):
are allow ourselves to put well,we didn't have phones.
You know, we're looking at ourphones and we're doing something
else and we're doing so manythings at the same time that
we're not ever really where weare.
Yes, you know, and I think thatit's really unfortunate because
(49:36):
we can't just hit a button andwe're across the world and we're
talking to somebody, like weare now.
No, but in reality,unfortunately, I think that
we're not as much with thepeople that are with us in our
own families and in our owncircles and our own towns than
(49:56):
we used to be and we're just somuch more busy and we're seeking
for so many different things.
You know, when I look at what mychildhood was versus what my
kids' childhood is now, I mean Ialmost feel really bad for them
because it's getting them toput those devices down and be
able to look and sit at a dinnertable and to feel more
(50:18):
connected than we ever.
That we haven't felt in for, Ithink, a decade.
And it's getting worse as thedecades go, unfortunately, in
the more that AI and the morethat the Internet has evolved
into our world, I think thatwe're getting more and more
distant from what we used to beand have really personal,
(50:42):
heartfelt conversations, and Ithink what you're doing with all
these different modalities isyou're bringing people back to
becoming more centered, and Ithink that we're going to need
those things more and more, asthe more these other things are
integrated into our world and wefeel more distanced.
Speaker 2 (51:06):
Yeah, I agree Definitely.
Speaker 1 (51:10):
Well, healing the mind, body and soul is a series
of brave steps, and you areproof of what you can do and you
know.
So many times those are stepsthat no one else sees when we're
doing them and that can make itharder, because it is a choice
(51:33):
that we have to make withinourselves on a regular basis to
become our best self, and I knowyou've personally done a lot of
work.
But you have really taken thisto another level, and so I so
appreciate our conversation.
How can people get a hold ofyou and learn more about how you
can help them and what you aredoing?
Speaker 2 (51:56):
I've got a website, yourvitalitycoachingcom, and
there's loads of information onthere.
There's lots of blogs there,there's information about all of
the services I offer and howthey might work for different
people in different scenarios.
So there's loads of stuff onthere that people can have a
look at and, if they fancygetting in touch, I'm on
(52:18):
Facebook and Instagram andthere's a link to my emails on
the website.
So, yeah, definitely have alook, get in touch and it'd be
really good to chat.
Speaker 1 (52:29):
So people aren't in the UK.
I mean, can they still reachout and ask for help and how can
you do?
Speaker 2 (52:36):
that I do a lot of work over Zoom.
Zoom's been an amazing tool,hasn't it?
It's definitely made the worldsmaller over the last 20 years
or so.
Speaker 1 (52:48):
So it doesn't matter if they're not in the UK, they
can still contact you and askfor help, absolutely.
Yeah.
Well, that's a good thing foryou know, for these types of
situations.
And now we can just like I said, we can just click a button and
there you are and we can say,zoe, I really need you.
Speaker 2 (53:10):
can you teach some of these, like yoga and reiki and
different things, even fromacross the pond, uh-huh yeah,
I'm just in the process ofsetting up an online platform
and because what I'd love to beable to do and it's something
that I actually did when I cameback to the UK first, after
COVID, I used to teach exerciseclasses online and I used to
(53:33):
deliver them through a Facebookgroup, and I had a group of
ladies it was all ladies whoused to come to the classes, and
it changed our lives as a group.
I put myself in there as wellbecause, um, we built a
community and you know what,over the last couple of months,
I've been downloading thosevideos off off that platform,
(53:56):
off Facebook, to put up onto myonline platform and to grow from
there.
And looking back at thecomments on all of the videos
and looking back at the videos,it's really made me realize what
a community we built and howsupportive everyone was of each
other.
And then, looking at where theladies went, um, when I, when I,
stopped doing those classes,and life changed.
(54:18):
We all got on with other thingsand, uh, one of those ladies
has recently been to spain tocompete in a high rocks
competition, and so, you know,they carried on Everybody's
carried on their journeys.
And so, yeah, I'm in theprocess now of setting up an
online platform to take myclasses back online and that
(54:39):
will be open right around theworld.
The Internet is our worldwidewebsite.
I'm hoping to build a communityonline and make it
international.
That would be amazing.
Speaker 1 (54:52):
So yeah, that'll be one way okay, well, for anybody
that's listening, I mean, shareit, get the word out there and
you can go to her website andyou can absolutely check her out
and contact her.
That would be amazing.
Now, as we always say at RealTalk with Tina and Anne, there
is purpose in the pain and thereis hope in the journey.
(55:14):
Every step we take is astepping stone to where we are
going.
Thank you for being here.
Thank you.
(55:36):
I keep yeah, keep growing, keeppushing pause when you need to,
and always remember that you cangive yourself permission to
pivot and start again.
You are a soul.
You have a body, and I've neverreally thought about that
before.
That really hit me when I readit.
So that's pretty powerful andit's also the reason why, like
(55:57):
Buddha said, to keep the body ingood health is a duty,
otherwise we shall not be ableto keep our mind strong and
clear.
And I want to leave you withthis.
Plato said the part can neverbe well unless the whole is well
.
So please share this episodewith someone.
(56:18):
Let people know about Zoe Smithand your vitality coaching as
usual.
We will see you next time.
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