Ep 52: Money, Business and the Coaching Industry

Episode Transcript
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Meg O'Neill (00:04):
Hey beautiful humans. Welcome to sex, love and
everything in between.

Jacob O'Neill (00:12):
You're here with Jacob and my wife, Meg. And this

is the place where we have all the very, very real
role and extremely unfilteredconversations about sex, love,
and everything in between.

It's here you get a behind the scenes look into
our relationship. And we willnot be holding back. Well, we
might have

no, you don't know how to do that. Not at all. So
beautiful ones. Thank you forbeing here. Enjoy this episode.

Hey, lovers.

Hi. Love is Hey, lava. Hi, man. How are you? I am
good. You good? And good.

Have you had the greatest day ever?

I have had a day I've had a day I feel great.
Now. I was spiraling a littleearlier. Spiraling and I haven't
felt that much down in a while Iwas just really in a lot of
doubt around my value, and mywork. And yeah, I'm just about

(01:19):
to make a really big investmentin Yeah, a really big investment
in my business. And I think itwas just bringing everything out
to the surface around. Yeah, mywork. And I think that's what
you will. That's my experienceof whenever I've made big
investments or I'm about tolike, really step into the next
evolution of my work. It isalmost a permission slip to see

(01:43):
all the shit I need to see andmeet and feel in order to
experience that next thing thatI'm, I'm ready to experience. So
how did I like that? Felt like,Oh my God, what do I even do?
Why am I even here would havepeople even listen to me like my
stuff. And then I had just likethe best fucking afternoon of
coaching and really, reallyserving. And that is always for

(02:05):
me when I'm ever I'mexperiencing any kind of doubt
or any kind of doubt. For me,just like service is always the
way back into remembering, justlike surf. And I really, if
anyone listening that has abusiness, if you're just like
spiraling like going fuckingsurf, even if it's the free,

(02:26):
like go and just get in theenergetic of serving your
people. And that just like getsyou out of the fuck out of the
fuck out of your own fuckingway.

It reminds you why you do what you do. And
brings you back to the actualcore of your work, which is to
Yeah, which is to give? Well,I'm happy for you. Thank you so
happy for you,

you really helped me beautifully today.

Yeah, but you you think it's anything like when
we're about to be initiated intothe next level of
responsibility, especially inour work. Of course, all the
stories that are conflictingwith that, that level of
capacity are going to come up,it's like, you can't hold both
of those in your body. Like youcan't not you can't like believe

(03:11):
you're only worth a certainamount and then invest something
beyond that you have to actuallylike, meet all of those things
and then choose anyway. Andthat's what business can be such
an initiator, for, forleadership, like self
leadership, especially if you'rean entrepreneur journey and you
like this is really theenergetics behind like this kind
of work that we do. It's like,knowing that, that is the thing

(03:34):
we need to do. And realizingthat we're gonna have to face
all of the uncomfortable thingsthat are in its way. And all
those things that you weresaying aren't true. But they're
the beliefs that can stop youfrom doing what the actual next
step is in your business. Andyou could have easily gone and
done 150 other different thingstoday. But that was the one
thing that was asking you to bepresent with it. And I

think I just want to speak into one other thing
here because I'm making a biginvestment in in branding and
web design for my for mybusiness. And I only decided I
wanted that like last week. AndI was only really once I decided
that I was like yeah, maybewe'll spend x amount of dollars.
I am now deciding to spend aboutthree times that amount. And so

(04:18):
it does it's an investment thatdoesn't really make sense. Like
I could go and find someone thatis three times less than what
I'm about to pay. But this womanthat I found just feels fucking
true and fucking right. And

what we're gonna say is a pattern here. This has
this isn't the first time

it means spending three times the amount of

time this is not the first time well what are you
getting at? This is how you rolllike this is your you know this
is you like rack wreckreconciling that you'd like the
fucking you like high quality.

I like high quality, and I like things.
Yeah, for me. What I was reallygetting at them was like This
felt right. And I think, youknow, I am not an advocate for
going and just making becauseI've seen women do this just
going and being like, I justthrow money at things and then
that shouldn't make me moneyback. No. Like, there needs to
be a level of consciousness inthe way we're investing money if

(05:15):
we're in business or anything,but sometimes we are going to be
cold to make an investment. Thatdoesn't really make logical
sense. Totally. And I think inbusiness, like you reminded me
of this, when I got off the callwith this woman that's going to
do my website, then I felt I'dbe like, Oh, God, fuck, I'm
gonna do this. And you were justlike, of course, you fucking

(05:36):
are. Like, of course, youfucking are. This is what we do.
And I think there's an elementeven I was watching. I was
watching a podcast with Casey,nice Danny stat on Diary of a
CEO with I think it's StevenBartlett. And they were talking
about this is like, you know,successful CEOs and successful

(05:57):
creators that like other peoplecan look in at your journey as
an entrepreneur and be like,That's fucking stupid, or that's
a dumb decision, or that doesn'tmake sense. And yeah, some
successful entrepreneurs are theones that are willing to take
risks, and the ones willing todo the things that don't really

(06:17):
make sense. If you are lookingfor a life that makes sense,
don't become an entrepreneur.
Yeah, don't do it, get a nine tofive. Being in business is going
to invite you to, yeah, gobeyond logic and to trust
yourself and to, yeah, takerisks and fucking back yourself.
And that takes such a nervoussystem capacity to be willing to

(06:39):
be with the sensation of risk,and to be with the sensation of,
I have to trust myself here. AndI don't know the outcome, but
I'm fucking going to backmyself. And yeah, that there has
to be an element of insanity. Ithink with running a business
and, and being on being anentrepreneur, I truly believe

(06:59):
that is

he willing to hold that open loop like to be
okay with not having it allfigured out, not having the path
clear, yeah. And set. And Iliken it to seeing the
mountaintop that you want to goclimb to but there's this forest
in front of it, you can just seethe peak, and you can see the
mountaintop, and you can seethat you need to enter the
forest, but you have no ideawhat's in that fucking forest.

(07:24):
You have no idea what you'regoing to have to face. But you
know, that mountain top is whereyou're going. And that's the you
know, for you, that's what thatis that that investment is
there. Like if you weren't tochoose that you would be
compromising on your, your felttruth. And that's the the
investment piece of that. Andthat has served us multiple
times in our personal andbusiness lives. And even in our

(07:46):
relationship with how we threwdown at our wedding like with
the investments we made, that wedidn't hold back. And there's
not one part of me that hasregretted the investments that
we've made in all areas of ourlife. And just to give some
context, because I like to bringstory we went rug shopping once.
And we made was looking onlinefor rugs and they're $400 $800.

(08:10):
And she's looking and she couldnot find one she liked.

I think it was like 400 was like the max that was
Yeah, and you just could notfind one you liked. Right. And I
was getting so frustratedbecause I'd been looking for
hours. And I was like, Oh, Ican't find it. I like this is
really hot. It was

terrible. It was absolutely just a hug. I really
felt for you. But what happenedthen was we went for a drive to
Burleigh to take a look at somerugs anyway.

Yeah. No, you asked me when I was getting frustrated
on my laptop later, if you wouldlike, if you could have any
fucking rug you desire, whatwould it be? And I was like,
rockin long story Burly. Andyou're like, well, let's go look
at them. And oh, like, but Iknow what it is. And you're
like, let's just go look atthem.

And then what happened? We looked at them,

we looked at them.
And immediately I was like, I'mgonna take that one I spent
like, it was really two and ahalf grand is two and a half
$1,000. And then I had thebiggest month of my life in
business. Yes, I used I callthat like an activating
investment, an investment thatactivates you into a new state
of being that then supports youto create more in your life. I
also want to bring nuance intothis because I see this in the

(09:24):
coaching industry and I see alot of women just again,
thinking that are so I justspend money to make money. And
no, that's not what this is.
This is about if there issomething authentically that is
calling you. Right and you usediscernment in this this isn't
about just throwing money aroundwilly nilly, but something

(09:46):
that's authentically callingyou. It can bite by circulating
money towards that thing. It canalmost like shift your self
concept and activate you into anew state of being which then
can you know, allow Used to be aspace for more money or allow
you to feel like the womanthat's able to create more
money. And that was definitelythe case for me. I think I had

(10:06):
my first 20 grand month thatmonth after I bought the rug
because it just activatedsomething.

Well, you like that, to me is like you honoring
your deep desire, like activateddepth of like receivership.
Like, oh, when I honor my deepdesires, I'm a space for for
more. Yeah, which was cool. Andlike, I want to bring in another
story because I'm just gonna putyou on the spot if that's okay,
my love.

I love that this is not where the episode was gonna
go. But we're

gonna get there.
I love that. I feel like we'regonna find a segue shortly.
Yeah. When you enter by yourcar.

Yeah, so this is a fucking pattern isn't it's a
pattern. It is

such a pattern.
So we've started looking at the25 999 base model mg. Yep. And I
was like, this is a nice car foryou my love, this is got
everything that you need. It'slike it's reliable. They're good
little cars like this. This isin the repayments are going to
be sell for, you'll be able tosort this all out. So this is
this is your car. And then youas you do explore the rest of

(11:04):
the MG website. Whoa,

did I think I'd already seen the electric one.
And I was like, a little drawnto it. And then because it was
during COVID, we had the womancome out to our house because we
couldn't get across the borderto the showroom, or whatever it
is. And so the woman came out toher house. And at the time, we
lived in an eco village. Soeverything is you know, kind of
off the grid were very ecofriendly, very eco friendly. And

(11:33):
there's a lot of electric cars,and they can village and she
drove in and she was a greatsaleswoman. And she was like,
Why are you looking at the basemodel? Like, I'm think living
here you you really ecofriendly. Why wouldn't you get
the electric car

we rent for first? I was No, that's not how
it works lady like we're lookingat the base model.

And then I was like, Well, funny. You say that?
Because I have actually feltcool. Tell me more about it.
Okay, it's 20 grand well.

I wanted to stretch this out a little more.
So it's 25 999 for the basemodel. And then it's like, well,
that doesn't have heated seats.
It's also there's not leatherseats. It also doesn't have the
sunroof. So we looked at thenext one, which was around 30, I
think was like 32. That's 999We'd reconcile. Okay, well, you
definitely need seat warmers.

Yeah,

you definitely need like, you definitely need
it also had a good yeah, it wasgood little cart. Love it. And
then that's when Wendy, Wendy,she came out. And she's like,
she just hit you with the hardquestion. Why are you yelling
for the electric? And you'relike, why aren't I? I want the
electric. And we've gone westarted at 25 999. And we ended

(12:42):
up at 44 999, which is a jump ofalmost $20,000. It was so it was
it was just a yes. And eventhough in my mind, like, let's
be practical here and let's besensible. There was a part of
you that was honoring your deepdesire for that for what you

(13:03):
actually wanted, you weren'tgoing to compromise on your deep
desires, knowing full well thatyou had the capacity to stretch
into that as you know, you hadthe capacity to financially make
that work. It wasn't like you'regoing by being myself. No, you
weren't going buying a $250,000car you bought you were

(13:24):
stretching yourself in a waythat was still in the zone of
courage not the zone of chaos.
Yes.

And that's like this investment as well. I have
the the website I have the moneyfor it. It was just a lot
stretchier than I originallyplanned. Correct. And yeah, but
it's again, it's like this isthis is right. And it feels
there's there's more sensationwith this experience of
investing that but it's feelsright. And I think also
something I want to note becauseone thing i and this is very

(13:54):
much been my practicepotentially yours in the last
year as well. And also as acouple, but I started earning
money very quickly, about twoyears ago compared to what I
went from having a $40,000 ayear to like a quarter of a
million dollar a year and likethat was like what the fuck and
it never, you know, we hadstruggled and were in debt for

(14:14):
years and years and years. Andthen suddenly I was like knowing
how to make money. So suddenlythere was lots of money I don't
want to spend all that fuckingmoney. Yeah, and I got really
really good at that I got goodat making and I got good at
spending yet and I think there'sbeen a depth of consciousness
that's come into my life, myspending my business, all of it
in the last year, which has beenreally beautiful. All of those

(14:36):
things that we just spoke about.
They weren't unconscious, justthrowing money out into life.
They were very like I'm all ofthem felt activating and really
powerful and I stand behind allof those investments, stand
behind everything I've spentmoney on but there's been a
moment maybe not that ridiculousplace we stayed up for. Actually
I stand behind that but That waskind of ridiculous the amount I

(15:00):
wanted to spend on that

one, then the beach opinion. Yeah, yeah, that
was, I would say that wasunnecessary.

I think that was that was reckless.

I think we've made some reckless investments.
Like we went and slept on thereef at.

I wouldn't say that one wasn't.

Yeah. And I also feel like if we had to like, go
back and take a look at how wewere spending our money. Yeah.
And we looked at more of a longterm vision, we were definitely
in a season of yes, let's let'sdo this. And we got a helicopter
to fucking Whitehaven Beach orwhatever like, and we,

I think after so long of like, we were really
reflecting on this the otherday, we went and lived or not
lived, but we went to Bali forlike a few months, probably five
years ago, now, almost fiveyears ago. We had no money, I
couldn't even go to a yogaclass. And we didn't have $15 to
spare to go to a fucking yogaclass. We had to we had, we had

(16:04):
like, $3 in our bank account atone stage and my, my pay was
supposed to come in from thenetwork marketing company I was
working for at the time. Andthen we realized it was fucking
Easter. And there was like threemore days of public holidays
until the money came.

So you remember that your sister or your mom
like sent us? 50 bucks? Do youremember asking for

Yeah, we asked for money, but then it couldn't come
through bank accounts. Rememberwhat happened?

It came in, and then your MailChimp or Spotify,

all of these, the money suddenly came in. But
because we hadn't had money inthere, all of my subscriptions
came out. So we got my mom ordad to send us $50 So we could
eat. And then suddenly, on thosedollars is gone. We went to get
it out. The cash is gone. Yeah,we were like, Why isn't this
fucking working? The $50 was inmy account. And then we looked
in it wasn't because I had takenout.

And that was a sad.

That was such a low point. Yeah. And I remember just
like yearning to have. I lovethat this conversations about
money now. I remember yearningto be able to have money to
like, yeah, go to a yoga class,or like, go to a store, look at
events, even like I remember,someone was holding a women's

(17:19):
circle here on the coast. And itwas like $50. And I was just
like, that's fucking ridiculous.
I didn't have $50 to spend on awomen's circle. And then, a few
years later, I was investing 10sof 1000s of dollars in being in
spaces like that. But yeah, itwas really beautiful when we
were when we were at lunch theother day, and we had Django and

(17:40):
we're just like sitting there.
And I forget what we werereflecting on. I think he looked
at me and you were like, we havea really beautiful life. Look
what we've created. And I thinkit's so it's so cliche, but it's
so true that we can get socaught up in what is next. And
forget to stop and breathe intowhat is here. And again, so

(18:04):
cliche, but we can forget thatwe're actually living out what
our past self deeply drempt oflike if that version of us in
Bali saw the life we had creatednow, even that we have this
podcast and the amount of peoplethat listen to this podcast, and
we're

sitting in six or $700 chairs on the podcast,
like, there was no part of methat ever thought we'd have the
capacity to live this live atthis, like desired like this,
this level of desire. Like I wasalways like, yeah, I never I
never knew this was possible.
And I'm not saying that we're ina position of like, infinite
abundance of like, we can quitour jobs and go and like, do

(18:46):
whatever we want. Like there'sstill a part of us that is
actively engaged in growing ourbusinesses. There's just so much
more we desire, but yeah, tolike, and that's what I think
like for so many people thatthey feel like they're on this
never ending pursuit of that,then the next thing is like, do
you ever stop and just reflectback on the last year, three
years, five years, 10 years andsee where you've come from? I

(19:09):
only realized the other day,that's been 15 years since I've
been at high school. Well, I wasjust like, reflecting on being
at being 17 and 18. And I wasthinking about how like, at that
age, my nan and pop had a childat 18 they had a child, I was
thinking far out I've spent thelast 15 years figuring shit out.
Imagine if I had a child to lookafter in that. If I had like a

(19:33):
level of responsibility that wasbeyond just my own. My own self
development. I'm like, wow, thisis this is huge. So I think
yeah, I think like, the otherday when I was sitting in a cafe
like this is a beautiful life. Ithink that's that comes from
reflection and having those lowmoments which are part of the

(19:54):
part of the journey.

Yeah, Hmm, and that ability to reflect and that's
something else. I've we've beentalking about this a lot I've
been really landing in this inmy own work and life. And again,
so fucking cliche, but the factthat like where always Is he

(20:21):
okay yeah, Django is just in theroom with us sleeping under
Jacob's chair the cliche pieceof like, there's no destination,
it's always a journey. And likethat's just really landed.
Cliche like that, like so deeplylanded, like just seeing the

(20:44):
part of me, particularly inbusiness that always thought I
was going to get to a placewhere it just suddenly got easy.
Like it was all easy and therewere no issues and there was
always this feeling ofcompletion. And I'm like, Ah,
that's, that's not business.
Business is a process like, I'mconstantly you always remind me

(21:09):
of this, like, you're alwaysgoing to be creating, there's
not just like this Apex point ofbeing like, Woohoo, it's done.
Like, there's going to bemilestones along the way. But
there's always going to be thiselement of, I'm on the journey,
I'm in process and this year isfor me is really been about like
accepting that. Like, Ah, okay,can I rest into the journey? Can

(21:32):
I rest into the feeling of thisbeing a process, instead of
like, gripping hold and holdingmy breath until I get to the
finish line? realizing like,well, I'm always gonna be
fucking gripping and holding mybreath because there's not an
actual finish line in business,

tantric business baby, relax into wax into it.
Well,

I always say how we fuck is how we do life. Yeah.
And it's true. It is a lot of usare holding our breath and
gripping on to trying to get ourorgasm out or like forcing our
orgasms out. And it's the sameway we go after whatever we want
in life. And if we actuallylearn to relax into our body,
relax into the moment enjoy thejourney while we're fucking

(22:16):
ourselves or another person, ormultiple people, you know, that
really ripples out into life.
The way we talk is the way we dolaugh came on.

Is there anything else you want to share about
business my love? finances soyou can the other finance tips
for Meg's 10 Finance tips?

No, we started seeing a financial advisor a few
months ago,

I think the key thing really powerful for us, I
think the journey is like yeah,being willing to do whatever it
takes to follow your yourpassion, even if it means being
broke as fuck in Bali, if itmeans moving in with your
partner's parents for fuckingfour months in Brisbane did
that. Even if it means likedoing stuff that like doesn't
make sense to anyone else. Iknow, I spent fucking hours
doing that fucking data entrytried to get my plumbing app

(23:02):
going for fucking days on end,when we were living with your
parents. And I was like, Thisjust feels like pure fucking
madness. Yeah. And it felt likeI was like, I don't know if this
is actually healthy. But therewas a part of me that wasn't
willing to give up. And I thinkthat like, that's where I
learned a lot from you have thislike, resilience, resilience

(23:23):
piece of like, I'm gonna keep ongoing, I'm gonna keep on going.
And I'm gonna figure this out.
And what then happened.
Subsequently, a few years later,from that moment took you took a
few years, was like maybe twoyears was, we then got to the
point where like, Ah, now weknow how to have money coming
in. We've learned how to havemoney flow into us into our bank

(23:45):
accounts. But then this wholeother arena of managing money
was the new challenge. So we hadmoney flowing in, right? Oh, you
did definitely before me, andthen I figured it out
eventually. But we then werelike, wow, look at this. What
should we do? Why don't we dothat? Let's do this. Let's do

(24:06):
that. And we were able to, like,circulate that money in a way
that like brought us a reallylike rich, enriching lifestyle.
But we hadn't learned how toactually, like manage that
money, even to the point that wedid try to do some investing,
and we got going pretty well.
And we got some money in theinvestment accounts. But then
we're like, Oh, you'll have abig fucking wedding. So we
decided to have a big fuckingwedding. And then that was where

(24:30):
like, we, we drained thatinvestment back into, like, what
we desired. And I don't have anyregrets around that. But at the
same time, I'm like, Oh, this iscool. Because we're learning
like our money can come to usquite easily now. Or we can we
know how to work with money in away that allows us to receive
deeply and be valued for ourservices. But can we actually
like create a nervous systemthat's able to hold that money

(24:52):
and then use that moneyaccordingly to our longer term
vision?

Yeah, huh? Yeah.

And we're getting there. Well, yeah, we had a
meeting with a financialadvisor. Yeah, we did. Yeah, we
did. And we did.

Yeah. That's our next edge is is the management
of money. Yeah. And the creationof wealth, which I'm so excited
about. Yeah, bring it on. Ithink the the almost like golden
piece I want to just reiterateto you beautiful humans
listening is yeah, that if youare on the journey of like,

(25:29):
creating something, especiallyin business, entrepreneurship,
it's that like, Patience.
Patience, patience, patience.
Patience, patience, patience,patience. Like, I also, I really
like the the podcast Diary of aCDR. I think, I love listening
to anyone who has had successand hearing their life story.

(25:55):
Like, I love that I loveunderstanding how successful
people, you know, came intosuccess no matter what kind of
realm of life or realm they'resuccesses in. And I was
listening to Diary of a CEO andSeth Rogen was on and Steven
asked him, like, like, what doyou attribute to your success?

(26:16):
And he just said, I just never,I never stopped. Yeah. Meaning
like, you know, he was like, I'mnot more creative than other
people. I'm not, you know,anything else and other people.
I just kept going. I didn'tleave the arena. And I think
there's such like, yes, skill,yes, anything like all of those

(26:36):
things are necessary. But ifyou're staying in the fucking
arena, you learn that over time,totally sharpen the sword, you
know, whatever the thing is,sharpen the sword, sharpen the
sword. But yeah, that's such a,there's such an unsexy truth to
that. Like, stay, hold, bepatient, it'll come. And I think

(26:57):
in the, in the world we live innow people are wanting like the
123 step formula to everything.
And I think that's a real sexyway to like, package up work and
do that sometimes. But the truthis, like, for long lasting
success, in Yeah, in whatever itis, it's it's patience.

(27:19):
Patience, patience, patience. I

really love the way that we bring the word
devotion into a lot of our work.
And I do this a lot with man, Ispeak about the journey, but I
speak about, like, you have topractice devotion, you have to
be devoted to the, the, theexperience of moving toward, and
I just, that's just the fuckingtruth. Like, there's no magic
bullets, you know, the magicpill, the silver bullet is they,

(27:48):
you can try them and they might,like you said, throw money at
something to try and get more ofwhat you want. Or maybe you
think that this is the nextthing that's going to change it,
but then you sort of wake up thenext day, and, you know, figure
out what you're going to do. Sowhat a you know, in a month's
time, there's going to besomething else to do on a year's
time is gonna be something elseto do in 10 years time, there's

(28:08):
gonna be something else to do.
So one of the things that Ireally love about our approach
is that we've we've createdthis, like really, really deep
understanding aroundsustainability when it comes to
depth, whether that's inbusiness, or relationship, or
just our own personal practice,it's like, can we prioritize

(28:31):
depth over speed? And can weknow when it's time to actually
like, just do the work day inday out, and when we're being
called to be initiated intoanother level of capacity. So,
you know, like you said, withyour branding, you could sit
there and day in day out for thenext three months, do the
branding yourself. But the realfact is that you need to invest

(28:51):
at a level that shows you thatyou're now stepping into a new
level of maturity in yourbusiness. I am the kind of woman
that has fucking biomassbranding, wicked representation,
and this is hey, I'm here likehere I am presenting to the
world as this this brand of thisbusiness, this service based
fucking woman who is so deeply,deeply devoted to her body of

(29:16):
work that I'm no longer going tobe doing the things that aren't
my zone of genius. And that's athat's a vulnerable place to be
but it's like the most beautifulpart like for me the the
initiation moments are what makemake for fucking awesome stories

do you want to go into it? We're gonna talk about
Oh, Jesus, I want to keep vibingwith this.

We just keep bobbing with this. This is a
whole podcast. Yeah. Cool, cooltopic. Let's keep going. Do you
want to just kick it off?

Yeah, keep going.

I am. I've also learned I

love everyone. It's like 930 at night and we've just
been on we were just on it andignite your intimacy Eagle CO
which is so fucking epic. And

we're gonna say Back to that we're definitely
still going to do the topic weoriginally were going to do is
Yeah. Can I

just feel like this is more just casual? Let's jump
on the mics and yeah, speak intowhatever is alive.

Just spit a 60 Truth. Yeah. What was he gonna
say? I've also learned so mucharound like pricing my work and
understanding how to like,create sustainability in my
business around like, Ah, I'mnot like my next program isn't

(30:32):
going to be the thing thatretires me. Oh,

I think that is so true. I even got caught up in
this energy thinking that yeah,like putting all all my
expectations on the one launchbut again like that's not
business and I think in thecoaching industry there is a
sometimes such a tunnel visionor like short term focus on yet

(31:00):
the next the next month or thenext launch, where if we look at
like big businesses, you know,that's not what they do. They're
like long term fucking visionand they're willing to take some
hits or take some risks in theshort term in service to the
longer vision and yeah, I thinkthat that's so important we do

(31:22):
that is in our industry to 100%So yeah, pricing not to be like,
Oh, this is gonna be 100k launchor Yeah, yeah,

definitely. And for me, I learned like, ah, like
I charged 4k This time nowcharge 6k now charge aka don't
charge 16k Downstairs 24k. Now,more and more, more, more more.
It's like, oh, what's actually ahealthy energetic exchange that
I receive money that I know I'mworth. And I'm excited as fuck
to serve these people.

I so agree. And

I've been I've been on both ends of the
spectrum, I've overcharged. Andthen I felt like I've needed to
give more more, more, more more,because I felt guilty for taking
so much money off from someone.
Ironically, they were happy toinvest that they got a lot of
value out of it. It was only myown incongruence my internal
congruence. So it's like,externally, everything was good.
But internally, there wassomething out. And I was like,
oh, cool, like, and then there'sbeen other times where I've

(32:15):
undercharged so fucking badly.
And I'll share like my firstlike, 12 month program that I
ran was called the mountainbrotherhood. And I fucking
charged $1,100 for 12 months ofcoaching with me. And these
guys, we got a monthly call,monthly group call a minor
monthly one on one. So I wasgave away like 24 calls for

(32:37):
$1,100 to each person and likethat was where I was at. But I
also learned pretty quickly thatour to offer something over over
a 12 month period, and thenlearn in that cycle was quite
drought as a big learning curvefor me at the start of my
journey. And it's like to beable to like, navigate my
pricing now to a point whereit's like, oh, this is what I'm

(32:59):
worth, this is what I know willdeliver, you'll receive an epic
amount of value. And I trustthat if you can't afford that,
then I don't need to change thepricing to suit you. Yeah,
completely. Yeah. And um, theone last thing I'll say before I
let you speak here, my love isthat like as you grow in

(33:21):
business, you build out ahealthy ecosystem of different
products and different valuableresources that give people
access to your work at differentlevels. Yeah, so I think that
this podcast has been so muchfun to like, just jump on and
just share so much of what we doand what we are about and just
be able to give it give it toeveryone every week for free
like so here have have some haveaccess to us.

It's been so fun to serve in this way so generously
for free. Like majority ofpeople, I would say listening to
this aren't in our work. Yeah,they probably will step into our
work but it's not as if everyoneis coaching with us. Not
everyone is in full spectrumwoman or everyone listening is
in seventh and sacred. No, likea lot of this is us serving for

(34:02):
free. And I think that's so thatthat's, that's part of how
business works, or at least thecoaching industry works in that
way. And this has been one of myfavorite things about the last
year is creating this podcastand, and serving in such a
generous deep way and buildingcommunity.

Definitely. Yeah, there's like it once again, that
devotion to service has comeback online more and more this
year for both of us I feel andin that we've created a more
healthy, sustainable, robustbusiness design individually
like for both of our businesses,where we're able to create
products and services thatactually like deliver value at

(34:39):
different different levels. Likeyou want to work with us one on
one, here's the price. If that'snot for you, here's here's a
group program that's not foryou. Here's a here's a short
course like here's there's somany ways for you to access
these words.

He's like, Yeah, 70 hours of podcast listening.
Yeah, and

the thing is, we're not it's beautiful to get
to a point. I think this is allpart of the journey to where
like If someone says no toworking with me like I had it
happened last Friday, I wassharing with a guy and he's
like, when I'm so excited towork with you one on one. I
said, Awesome, bro like to workwith me. It's, it's, it's $6,000
for three months. And he waslike, Oh, wow, I didn't realize

(35:14):
it would be that much. I said,Yeah, bro, that's my that's my
price, I can do a payment plan.
But if that if that's not if youcan't afford that right now, but
that's totally okay. It'stotally okay. I said I offer a
different other things and I canI'm gonna send you an email with
a few other things that I haveon offer. And if they feel
right, happy days, if not, andyou want to, you know, wait six
months and save up and or youwant to like, you know, work a

(35:35):
bit more and work out how youcould make this happen, then,
hey, I'm here. I'm not going toforce you into joining my
program. Yeah, so that's myclass. I think that's like, that
is such a, it's so nice not toneed people. In the role of
coach. I know, for me, there wasparts of my journey at the
beginning where I was like, Ineed your transformation more

(35:56):
than you do. Oh, that's big.
Yeah.

That's why I'm such an advocate for people having a
job whilst they start abusiness. Yes, I you know, when
I used to do a lot of businesscoaching, and I would always
advocate for women to do that.
Unless that was some peoplethrive in Fuck, I'm going all
the way the fuck in and I've gotno backup plan. And to a certain
degree, I've done that indifferent stages of my my

(36:25):
entrepreneur, business journey.
But also I just think it createit can create such a neediness
in business. And that's, that'snot fun to be in, as the
business owner. And that's notfun to be on the other end of
Yeah. And when you're when youhave, you know, an income
servicing your needs and yourbusiness can be there can be a

(36:47):
purity to that. Yeah, there's,there's beauty in that. And I
also think we all need to haveour kinda like, yeah, it's my
kind of moment. Totally. And

the two things want to say is like, there's a
concept of burning the boats.
That's like a really, I lovethat. Yeah. Do you want

to share that story? Yeah, so I also feel like
if anyone's watching the video,I'm flashing, I'm flashing,

flashing lights.
The concept of like, burning theboats is that there's these
these warriors, and they'resailing to a distant shore,
right. And the captain isleading them and there's a fleet
of these boats, and they pull upon this, this this rocky shore
with a big cliff, as this cliffhas got a beautiful big, just
like sloping hill and over thathill was they land they jump off
the boats, like we're gonna takeover this land, we're gonna

(37:35):
conquer it, we're gonna getwhat's ours, you know, go out
and you know, make it make makethe market over the hill comes
10,000 warriors, from the, fromthe, from this native to this
land, and they stand on top ofthe hill. And in that time,
before those warriors come downand find their way down the
rocky cliff and meet them on thebeaches, they they're able to be

(37:55):
put in a position where they'dhave to make a choice. Do they
hop on the boats and returnhome? Or do they face up to
these 10,000 warriors and fightand mind you there's 1000
warriors that have just rockedup on the boat. So they're
outnumbered 10 to one. And theyget option a stay in fight and

(38:16):
most likely die, option B, howoften the boats return home. And
what the captain orders the mento do is to lighter flame
lighter torch and burn everysingle one of the boats. So
option B is not an option. AndOption A is all that they've
got. So when they're fighting,they're fighting literally for

(38:37):
their lives. They're notfighting and if they start to
lose, they can hop on the boats,they go all the fucking way in.
And that to me is such a fuckingaudacious energy that when you
do make those decisions, andyou're making them from like an
actual like, I'm ready for thisfucking initiation not like I
need to be successful because Iwant people to see me as this

(38:59):
when you like I'm here tofucking serve and that's all I'm
gonna fuckin do. And I know whenthat comes online for me, like I
have a I have a mantra it'slike, especially with Teague on
this year I was like I'm runningthis motherfucker if I will. I
will go into debt I will do or Iwill lose everything for this
fucking retreat. I don't give afuck I'm going all in even if

(39:19):
I'm the only person that I'mgoing to do every single
practice for the four days bymyself and eat 400 Fucking
watermelons and all the shitthat I bought. And when I just
started speaking like that, Ijust couldn't stop fucking
talking about it. I couldn'tstop being about I couldn't stop
walking with this sense of like,I am that motherfucker like you
can't fuck with me because I'mdoing this regardless. And that

(39:39):
level of sovereignty that comesonline and that level of like
there's only one one outcomehere this is happening is
fucking powerful. What sometimeshappens those people and this is
the issue with the burn theboats thing is people will get
within say five or sixkilometres of the shore, and

(40:00):
they'll torch the boat, andthey're still out in the water.
And then they fucking trying toswim to shore. And when they get
to shore, they're exhaustedthey're burning the boats before
they actually get to shore. Soquite often people it's not
about burning the boats, beingthe right or wrong decision is

(40:21):
like, when do I burn the boats?
Yeah. And that's an important,important understanding that I
believe a lot of, especially alot of young entrepreneurial
like wide eyed people have tolike realize is like, sometimes
you gotta burn the boats beforeyou get to shore. And you're
gonna have to go through thatrealization of like, Fuck
humbling too soon. Yeah, yeah.
So that's the thing. The otherthe other thing that I wanted to

(40:46):
say, especially for people onthis journey, how are we doing
for time? My love? Yeah, good.
Good, is what do I need to feelsafe? What do I need for my
nervous system to feel safe forme to serve unconditionally?

Oh, say that again?

What do I need for my nervous system to feel
safe, in order to serveunconditionally. And that has
been a massive, massive gamechanger for a lot of the guys
that have worked with me thatare looking to like step into
leadership, it's like, if youare in an activated state, and
you're serving, and you're likeliving in scarcity, there's

(41:26):
going to be a part of you thatneeds your clients money more
than they need your services.
And in that dynamic creates aneediness. It creates an
insecure, like this insecureattachment to that person. And
energetically, they're going tofeel that you're going to feel
that and regardless of theoutcomes they get, it's not
going to stick because there'sthis. Yeah, there's this

(41:48):
imbalance. There's thisincongruence, even

the way you spoke about the client from last week,
when he was at a node of workingwith you, there needs to be a
level of what do you need? Whatdo you need so that you can meet
those moments with a level ofneutrality? Totally. Like, I'm
the same when a client comes tome, and they, you know, they're
interested in working with me,and then even if they're like,

(42:16):
Yeah, I'm so in and then theyghost it's just like, I'm so
fucking neutral to that shitnow, because I'm like, I don't
there'll be someone else orlike, I don't. And that's also a
privilege to get to that stageof business where I'm not
relying on. Bless you. Unlessyou were. Yeah, I'm not relying

(42:36):
on that. But also that this iswhat I was saying before. I
really invite. Yeah, I really,when I used to do a lot of
business coaching, I would beinviting my clients to, yeah,
have if they need a job if theylike anything, so that they can,
you know, actually meet theirclients with a level of
neutrality. And that's ofservice to them. But that's more

(43:00):
importantly in service to theclient. And future client. 100%.

Oh,

I love that. This.
This has been like money chats,business chats, yeah. Anything
else we want to bring. The

other thing that I want to speak about was like
the difference between likeinitiation investing in
integration investing. I thinkthat's a really cool thing to
speak about. Like, tell me likefor you like there's a there's a
part of his he's like,

God, he's like, on his back we'd like one lay. Oh,
my God, it's cheeky guy Iunderstand it better look at
them. It's having a dog is thebest thing ever. How have I
never had a dog before?

Like, for some, for some people, like an
initiation investment is thething that is like it's the burn
the boats moment, right? It'sthe I need to invest in a way
that is going to activate meinto going all in. Yeah, yeah.
And that's an initiationinvestment. Right? Like for me,
right now, I'm not in aninitiation investment season.

(44:00):
But when I did invest in mybusiness coach, I invested,
like, more money than I everhave. And the same thing
happened like I you know, withinthree, three or four months, I'd
had some of my biggest monthsever. Business just drew the
energetic alignment of like, I'mall in now. I'm not Yeah, I
never I when I speak, people askme what I do. I'm like, I'm a

(44:21):
full time men's coach. Like Idon't leave space for the the,
the uncertainty, or your men'scoach, like, do you do that
part? No. I'm a full time men'scoach. And I would speak with
such conviction, like, this iswhat I do. And I became so much
clearer in how I delivered whatI do. Like I'm a men's
leadership coach, I coach men tolive freely, love deeply and

(44:43):
serve humbly. So humanity canfucking thrive. And that became
like really fucking clear once Istarted investing in like once I
had those initiationinvestments, which was fucking
awesome. It was such a beautifulexperience to go through that
firsthand after seeing you gothrough it, my love, and then
the integration investments orhow am I actually maintaining a

(45:08):
place in the arena? How am Iactually stepping into the arena
regulated and keeping myselffine tuned to the frequency of
expansion and growth. And that,for me has been a lot of my
ceremony work like religiously,like going to ceremony like
staying connected to sweat lodgestaying connected to, I'm
currently in America, a lowticket mastermind where I get to

(45:31):
like be a part of a communityand I get to go on like, weekly
calls and jam on differenttopics and just being a part of
like, a group where I can speakinto what I'm creating and just
be seen and, and moving withother people that are operating
at the level I am. Feels likeI'm still in the arena, I'm not
initiating myself, and then justgoing back into what I was doing
before. And this for me is superimportant for people to

(45:53):
understand like, yeah, you ifyou're continually like
stretching yourself in thoseinitiation investments, there is
a point where you will have tointegrate.

Yeah. And I think it's also I've witnessed this, I
don't think, probably had oneinvestment like this, where I
invested in I realized, oh,fuck, I was just investing in
that, because I thought that wasgonna make me lots of money.
Yeah. And that was just almostlike a caffeinated investment.
Like a really like, Oh, my God,I feel like, you know, full of

(46:24):
caffeine, I'm like a bit, youknow, hi. I'm going to make that
investment without actually itbeing embodied. And I've seen
and witnessed the effects ofthis in the industry where
people are, especially women inbusiness are just again, like
throwing money out there,thinking that, Oh, that's what I
do. You just throw money at acoach and they make you lots of
money. And it's like, no, don'tinvest in something that isn't

(46:48):
true for you. Don't invest insomething that doesn't feel also
that you can't fucking getbehind and you can't own. If you
were to get nothing out of thatexperience. Can you still sit
behind that investment? Can youstill have nothing? Meaning
like, if you want to make moneyout of that, can you still stand
behind that investment? And Ithink there were a lot of people

(47:09):
investing money that thatcouldn't, and they would just
doing it from this, this code,this coach makes lots of money.
If I give money to them, they'llbe able to make me lots of
money. That's not how it fuckingworks at all. And there has to
be such a depth of there's sucha depth of ownership and every
investment I've in I've made andyeah, yeah, I think that's just

(47:29):
changing in the industry. Ithink it was a lot in the
women's coaching space. I didn'tnecessarily or not really in the
men's coaching space. But I'veseen the energetics really shift
and people are way morediscerning there. I am not
seeing this like like you saidbefore, it's like
6k 10k 20k 30k 40k 50k Like it'sit's it's less caffeinated. It's

(47:51):
there's a there's a groundednessto the industry that probably
wasn't there a year ago. Andeven for me, I felt that like
yeah, I'm I'm focused so muchmore on sustainability. I'm not,
you know, I raise I put down myprices probably a year ago, and
that feels really good. For me,I'm focusing more on
sustainability than like, howmuch can I fucking charge?

(48:13):
That's not Yeah, yeah, I'm, I'm,yeah, I'm wanting to add, like
accessibility is reallyimportant to me, accessibility
having my work, you know,obviously, not everyone can work
one on one with me. So that's ata certain price point. But for
me, even that's the reason why Ishifted full spectrum woman that
used to be a high end program,and women would pay 1000s and

(48:34):
1000s of dollars to be in thatspace with me for three months.
I was like, I want more fuckingwomen in this work. That's what
I was really cool to. And nowwomen pay a few $100 a month to
be a part of that. And there'sstill equal amounts of value, if
not more in terms of whatthey're receiving. So yeah, I
think that's what shifted for mearound that. Yeah,

if I can, I love that. And like, yeah, like, what
I hear in like, both of our,like, our words right now is
like we're playing we'reshifting from how can I have the
My biggest quarter or my biggestmonth? To how can I create
something that's like, like,long lasting? How can I like
build quality products andservices that allow people to

(49:21):
really deeply receive from ourwork and have access to our work
at varying levels so people canhave the experience that they're
designed to have, and even afterjust getting off, ignite your
intimacy, and we ran that, likea, like a really affordable
price over always loads ofvalue, and just seeing the you
know, some of the some of theguys on that were just having

(49:43):
some bright absolute, likemassive like, moments in their
relationships that were justleading to like the most epic
fucking, like sex and love andintimacy, and I was just like,
Man, fuck it, like I love thisshit. I love serving people. I
love sharing this info. motionand I love being a stand for it.
And part of that is like, seeingthis as a life long journey for

(50:07):
us, like, Yeah, I'm not here tobe a coach for the next fucking
three months, I'm here to be acoach for the rest of my life.
And I'm, I'm a big advocate forowning that, that, that fucking
label, so many people that I'vespoken to, and a lot of guys
definitely they're like, oh,like coaches of fact, or
coaching is just, you know,that's just, I don't resonate
with that word. I'm like, if youdon't resonate with that word,

(50:29):
yet, you're trying to doeverything that a coach does,
you're not willing to fuckingtake the arrows, you know,
willing to stand up and like,deliver quality and set a
standard for not only yourself,but the industry. And that for
me, you know, I've, I'm veryclear on you know, I don't we, I
set you know, my container atthree months to work with me one
on one, but just, you know, Ijust had a guy call me today to

(50:50):
tell me about the breakthroughthat he had, you know, two weeks
after we finished I thought,this is as like, I'm gonna
answer this because this isgonna be good. He's like, Hey, I
just had to, I had to bring intell you about, you know, the
result. Like, it's all landing.
I'm just like, you know, I'm, Iwant to be the guy that can
answer a call like that have a10 minute chat with a client
that the previous client, closeit down and be like, cool.

(51:10):
stoked for you, bro, and be ableto, like, receive that feedback
and like, take that with me anduse that as fuel rather than
being this harsh, like, theseare my boundaries. This is how I
offer and it's like, no, I'm afucking human. I'm here to
relate with people, obviously,you know, not just to give my
time and energy away, but tounderstand that, like, we
fucking do the work and wefinish when the work is done,

(51:31):
you know, I'm not going to leaveyou hanging, I'm not going to
leave you half baked. That's notThat's not a healthy I believe
that's a healthy way to leadwith integrity, especially in
this coaching arena. Sorry, Ijust had to get a little bit
pumped up about that. And tothere was another thing I was

(51:52):
gonna say around like the youknow, he said, like with the
women and like that, that almostlike they're caffeinated
investing, I feel that like menhave always like it for men to
have massive self worth journeyfor them to get, you know, I
know a lot of personaldevelopment was predominantly a
lot of women do it. And I'vespoken to other people that run
code gender stuff, and they have80 to 90% women. And for me,

(52:13):
like I'm focusing just on men,so I know how how big like an
investment can be itself. So forme like it's like how do I
actually build my business tomeet the market or to meet the
to meet the men where they'reat, whilst not diminishing my
value? And that's been a that'sbeen a really powerful journey

(52:34):
for me over the last 12 months.
Is there anything else that youwant to share my love around
finances or business or

the coding industry? No, this was this was
a fun, spontaneous, unexpecteddirection. But I hope you guys
enjoyed it. You guys enjoyed. Ifyou came for the relationship
shots, this episode probablywasn't for you. But I also know
that so many of yeah, those ofyou that are here in this
community are entrepreneurs,coaches are business owners, you

(53:05):
know, taking an unconventionalpath. So I'm sure there was a
lot of gold in this episode. Solet us know if you'd like us to
deepen into these kinds ofconversations more regularly as
well. Because you know, thepodcast is called Sex love and
everything in between it is alittle feedback like where's the
everything in between?

I love the everything in between. I'm here
probably more everything inbetween all talking about the
plants. I want to talk about.
Dogs.

Oh, at the dog, how we're training our dog how we're
training a dog. Our dog looks socute right now, guys. It looks
so adorable. He's upside down.
And he's he just having a dog isso beautiful, because they just
follow you everywhere.

That's been another part of the contentment
to like, just like feeling that.

Oh my gosh, like,

I'm not I don't like being called mommy and
daddy of the dog. We like peopleknowing that I like to be that I
like that. But um, yeah, it'smade of this. It's really felt
like family. It's felt like thisfamily energy. It's like, oh,
like, when

I left today, and I drove away and I was already
feeling emotional. And he said,I Well, my window down and you
were yelling. We love you. Asyou're holding our puppy and I
was like, we there's a wheel.

Yeah, it feels Yeah, it feels really special.
Yeah, and um, so that's coming.
So excited for parenthood withemail. Me too. Amazing. So

thanks for listening. Beautiful humans. We
will see you next week. Yeah,

I think we're doing a 2023 recount next week
and do a 2023 recap Bring it on.
And

then I actually have some I have a guest coming.
Oh yeah, you do this week torecord a podcast. It's gonna be
so fucking fun. So in a fewweeks time, potentially even
next week, there's gonna be avery saucy episode. So what was
that? Those sourcesOkay, thanks for being here.

(55:04):
Beautiful ones. We love you. Andyeah, we really appreciate you
listening. Me supporting mebeing a part of this journey
filled

with gratitude right now. We have a beautiful
life. We are so lucky. We

do and thanks for being a part of it beautiful
humans. We appreciate youreally, really, really fucking
appreciate you. And if you dolove the podcast, it means the
world to us and is deeplysupportive in having the podcast
get into more people's ears foryou to subscribe and also review
the podcast. So you can do thaton Apple. Go to the Apple App

(55:39):
find sex love and everything inbetween. Give it five stars
rights and cool shit.

Hell yeah,

that just really helps the podcast. Yeah be seen
by more humans and to have theseconversations in in the ears of
more humans that are devoted toEpic sets. Sets.

Epic sets of six.

Yeah, that can you tell it's nearly 10pm It's no.
Please bright light. You guys goout I was saying okay, we'll see
you next week. We love you.

Yo, yo, yo, thank you so much for tuning in to
another episode of Sex love andeverything in between. Now if
you'd like to stay connectedwith Megan i You can head on
over to Instagram and follow meat the Jacob O'Neill and where
can people find you lover at

the dot mag dot o me

amazing. And yeah, guys, check out the show
notes for all other informationin regards to what we've got
coming up. And yeah, we're supersuper grateful that you guys for
taking the time to listen in tothis podcast. If you do have any
topics or any questions, like Isaid, hit us up on Instagram and
we'll see what we can do. Apartfrom that have a beautiful,
beautiful rest of your day.

Thanks for being here.

Big Big Love.

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Ep 52: Money, Business and the Coaching Industry

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