January 4, 2023 • 33 mins
“You can’t solve a problem with the same mindset that created it.” -Albert Einstein
In this episode, we explore how mindfulness and intentional thinking can help us become more aware of our automatic thoughts and make more purposeful decisions about our relationship with alcohol. We'll discuss how to create a mindset that supports the vision of a life without drinking, and how to ultimately reach a point where not drinking is not even a thought. Tune in to learn more about how to fact check your mind and take control of your relationship with alcohol.
You’ve tried to cut back on drinking but nothing sticks, you're stuck in the cycle of confusion and convincing. One day you're motivated, the next you're telling yourself it's not that bad. What makes the difference isn’t more information—it’s having a new way to apply it. Click HERE to schedule your free consult to uncover the one thought that will change everything.
There Is A Life Beyond Moderation & Deprivation.
We Focus On What You Are Moving Towards, Not What You Are Moving Away From.
The Exhausting Trap Of Moderation Ends Now With My No Shame Approach Using The Proven Five Shifts Process. Follow the path of 100's of Women, Click HERE to join today!
DISCLAIMER: This podcast and its contents are not a substitute for rehabilitation, medical treatment or advice. It is for educational and inspirational purposes. I am not a therapist or doctor. The views here are expressed a personal opinion and based on first hand experience. Please consult a doctor if your mental or physical health is at risk.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Unknown (00:01):
Do you ever feel like you're outgrowing alcohol, that
you are longing for a deeperconnection to life? If alcohol
is keeping you playing small andfeels like the one area, you
just can't figure out you are inthe right place. Hi, my name is
Mary Wagstaff. I'm a Holisticalcohol coach who ended a 20
year relationship to alcoholwithout labels, counting days or
(00:23):
ever making excuses. Now I helppowerful women just like you
eliminate their desire to drinkon their own terms. In this
podcast, we will explore therevolutionary approach of my
proven five shifts process thatgets alcohol out of your way by
breaking all of the rules, andthe profound experience that it
is to rediscover who you are onthe other side of alcohol. I am
(00:48):
so thrilled to be your guide.
Welcome to your journey ofawakening. Welcome back to the
show my beautiful listeners,thank you so much for being
here. As I reflected on my ownjourney. As I do, one of the
things I think is so importantwith the new year is not just to
plan the future. But to take amoment to presents everything
we've done with facts, it's likewe have to fact check our mind.
(01:11):
And that's what we're going totalk about today, how to fact
check your own mind. It's likethere's this journey of
awakening this awakening toconsciousness that's happening
simultaneously like with moreand more information coming into
our brain. And I'm going onthree years of the show, and,
you know, as you grow, and asI've gotten alcohol out of my
(01:34):
way, alcohol is no longer one ofthe things on like my top 10
list of what happens right likethis, the the success there was
there's no more efforting putin, and it really hasn't been
for the last at least couple ofyears. And that's what you have
to look forward to were beingalcohol free, is the is maybe
like the has become the root.
(02:00):
But like, of why you've beenable to grow so much. And
especially through this processof the journey of awakening. You
learn how to be mindful, and youlearn how to create a new
mindset. So that's why it'sactually such a gift to go
through the journey of awakeningwith alcohol, because this can
(02:22):
happen with anything withalcohol as the starting point or
the anchor calling you in. Butreally, it's just getting you
back to baseline of who youinnately are. And, you know, so
you can learn these skillswithout ever having, you know,
to get alcohol out of your way.
And you could learn thempartially with alcohol in your
(02:43):
way. But you don't have fullaccess to your really to
reality, right? Because there'salways this diluted part of the
alcohol being somewhereimportant in your brain and
trying to figure it out. And itjust takes up space where you
(03:04):
could be doing more, there's anefforting. Right. So getting to
the place where there'sliterally no efforting. And I
mean, that happens reallyquickly, you might have more
prevalent thoughts where youhave to fact check your mind. So
the difference between automaticthinking, and intentional
thinking is what we're going totalk about today. But that was
(03:27):
one of the things that showed upfor me, because I see this a lot
with, you know, in a lot ofsober communities and celebrate
yourself however you need towrite. But what I find with my
clients and with the five chefsprocess is that there isn't that
same efforting. And that's thewhole point, right? It's like we
(03:48):
want to get alcohol out of ourway and move on. And I think
that that's the best thing likesobriety isn't hard, right? Like
initially there's a thresholdyou have to walk yourself
through, there's a grace period.
But the thought that sobriety ishard, is not useful, in my
(04:10):
opinion, right. And it hasn'tbeen useful for my clients that
have major success. They reallywant that's like the whole thing
is you want to you have tointentionally decide on that
thought that sobriety is notgoing to be a challenge for me.
I'm going to go through aprocess and I'm going to learn
it. And that's the differencebetween automatic thinking and
(04:34):
habitual thinking like how likewho decides that sobriety is
hard, right? And what is hardabout sobriety? All it is is
your willingness to feel thesensations in your body. So
anything like we think it's thecircumstance that creates our
emotions, but it's our thoughtsabout it.
(04:55):
And if you haven't yet signed upfor a one on one coaching call
with me For the month ofJanuary, girl, I don't know what
you're doing. Because this is anamazing, amazing opportunity to
actually have a transformationin a really short amount of time
this offer is never going to behere again, $23 for a one on one
coaching call. And that way youcan experience the power of
(05:16):
coaching, I don't think before Istarted coaching myself and
having a coach, I didn't knowthe power of what was possible,
when two people come from aneutral place ready to solve
problems, like, you have to bewilling to like, Yeah, this is
where my mind is, and not takeit seriously not make it a big
deal, not take it personal,right, like I had a huge
breakthrough in a half hour withmy coach today. And this person,
(05:39):
I'm in a program where I get adifferent one on one coach every
week. So this person doesn'teven really like know me. And
it's fine, because I'm at alevel where I don't need that
and where my clients are cominginto me creating the safe and
sacred container to bevulnerable. And something like I
don't want to undermine everanyone's emotions, because I've
(06:00):
been there, right. And I want tocreate the safe and sacred
container for us to explore. Andthen when we move into the
portion of the program that isthrough written communication, I
already know you in a reallydeep and intimate level, I mean,
I'm pretty friendly with all ofmy clients, you can imagine.
That's why most people are here,because they, you know, I'm easy
(06:21):
to get along with them easy tolisten to. And, and so there's
the safety in like thevulnerability, right? And being
honest, where like, a lot ofpeople can't even do that in
therapy. And we laugh and wecelebrate. And you know, I'm
holding space to guide youthrough the emotions that sense
those things that you'reresisting so much. And then your
(06:42):
willingness to see like, oh,yeah, I have this thought not
useful, right? Like, oh, if I'mnot doing, you know, one of my
thoughts today was like, unlessI'm on a coaching call, like I'm
not creating value, unless I'mcoaching my client. And it's
like, so then that using my theETA process, it's like, the
actions I take from that place,are fueled with lack and
(07:04):
scarcity and panic, rather thanvalue. Right. So I, we create
based on the thoughts that we'rethinking, and that's why you
have to fact check your mind.
And the difference is not justin in retrospect, saying, you
know, oh, I know what I couldhave done differently. Or I was
(07:26):
making a big deal out of nothingor anything like that, like this
morning, I sat down, and I havethe intention this year and to
be to really work on the placesin my life where I have the most
reactivity, right where I spinout, like the circumstances that
I think are creating an emotionfor me, I want to intentionally
(07:49):
from a very neutral place knowwhat those are, experienced the
emotions in my body ahead oftime. So when they start to show
up in my real life, and I'm justgoing on habitual reaction,
right, I can take, I canrecognize it quicker and slow it
down. Matthew and I, at the endof the year just joined a what's
called the marriage upgrade. Andit's so amazing. And we haven't
(08:12):
even started coaching with thiswith this coach yet, Dr. Shavon.
She's amazing. She's very, like,just straightforward, simple and
profound. And before the programofficially starts, there was
kind of this primer programcalled the 21. Day sprint was a
very short audio, followed bysome questions. And Matthew and
(08:33):
I have been listening to thisaudio, we've been switching the
way that we spend our time tointentionally decide we want to
create a different result in ourrelationship, we want to upgrade
our relationship, we want to bemore conscious of the things
that aren't working, we don'twant to just say that like,
because you do this, this is howI respond, right? Our intentions
are peace, joy and adventure.
(08:54):
And just by making thisintention together and sitting
down and doing this, it'sslowing down the time where we
have maybe a natural reaction,like one of my things is to tell
him how to feel like, you know,in a moment where he's not
feeling. And the thing that Ireally want to do is to just say
(09:14):
I understand, it's okay is tovalidate him, let him have his
own experience and then comeback like especially if it's not
really affecting me, right. Sothe the whole act of bringing
something and this is the beautyof coaching, bringing something
into your awarenessintentionally when your nervous
system is online. And you arefeeling really good is okay, now
(09:39):
I'm going to go and check andI'm going to see what are the
thoughts what are the emotions Ihaven't been willing to feel
right because the circumstanceisn't really a problem if it
didn't create that emotion foryou and how we know that is
because everyone responds to aset of circumstances
differently. Right. So now allthe circumstances that you know
(09:59):
you have Have a resistance towhen it comes to alcohol. That's
not my experience. That's not myclients experience. Right and
there, it's going to bedifferent for everyone. Some
people have a lot of resistanceto being home alone by
themselves. Some people can goout and be social and never
drink, but it's when they're bythemselves. Some people could
never go out and be social,right? That's what they're
(10:19):
telling themselves. So thecircumstance doesn't dictate how
you're experiencing it, it isyour thought about it. So if
that emotion wasn't a problem,if you were willing to feel that
emotion first, you couldexperience the resistance, and
then go in willing to find newevidence. Okay, so what Dr.
(10:45):
Shavon calls, this is thethought makeover, right. And I'm
calling like fact check yourmind. So in addition to not
escaping feeling and emotion inyour body, calling out your
habitual mind is a skill thatyou need to have, like Matthew
will say something that he hasinformation about from like 15
years ago. And I have to likecall BS on him, right. And this
(11:06):
is what you have to do with yourbrain from in a really loving
neutral, like, you can kind oflaugh about it a little bit.
It's, it's the time when you'rein the heightened emotion that
it's hard to, you know, yourtake yourself so seriously. And
that's the thing, you got tostop taking your habitual
thoughts seriously, all of thethoughts that are creating your
results about alcohol are nottrue, they are not true. And you
(11:30):
have to stop taking them. Sopersonally, you have to start
investigating what they are andwanting to and willing to find
the opposite and createintentional thinking. Sobriety
is not hard, sobriety is a pieceof a breeze. Because what
happens when you think sobrietyis a breeze, you get to love the
results that it's giving youinstead of thinking about how
(11:52):
hard it is. And you get to loveyour reasons why when you bring
awareness to the thoughts thathave you in deprivation, or
scared or anxious to even take abreak or thinking about the
future, you have to examine themwith curiosity, your automatic
thoughts are make everything sopersonal, right? Because you
(12:17):
feel it in your body and that isyour lived experience. And if we
do not learn how to be inrelationship to our body, Elena
Brower today, I took a classthat said belonging to yourself,
what is it like to belong toyourself? To to make decisions
based on not the past you whenyou belong to yourself? You're
(12:40):
making decisions on this moment,right? But you also have to know
that automatic thoughts aren't aproblem. This is part of the
human This is how we learn. Sothere's really good reasons to
have automatic thoughts. But youalso just need to know are they
serving me or not? Because Ihave the automatic thought the
sobriety is a piece of cake,like there's no efforting in it,
right? That thought I want tokeep around forever, right? Like
(13:03):
I don't even think aboutsobriety like this is just my
life right? Like not drinking isis so easy for me. And it is. So
you want to you want to fillthis is the work right is we we
bridge the gap we bridge the gapto sobriety is hard to sobriety
is a piece of cake, and all ofthe thoughts that you need to
think in in the meat in betweentime.
(13:24):
So your opinions are based onwhat you have believed all of
that in interpretation, all ofthat socialized conditioning,
but you got to call BS on themand a really loving way. And you
can, it's just that shift ofperspective, right? And it takes
practice, it is a muscle thatyou build. And one of the
easiest ways I learned how to dothis really early on was saying
(13:47):
to myself, that's just athought. Or, you know, that's
not true for me anymore. I don'twant that to be true for me
anymore. I don't want that to bemy that's not my story anymore.
So just write that down. That'snot a thought. That's not my
story anymore. Right? That wasmy story. When I was in college.
That was my story when I was 16.
And I was so awkward. And I wasso shy. And I would go to those
(14:07):
keg parties. And I had a couplebeers. And I was like, now I
wanted to talk to everyone.
That's not my story anymore.
Because I'm a 41 year old womanwith a business with a kid with
a house with a you know, havingto do all these adult things and
working and like that's not mystory anymore. I know how to
interact with people without,you know, maybe there's some
things that aren't natural tome, but I but I can learn
(14:29):
anything, right? So you'd likethe willingness to like,
explore, that's not my storyanymore. You're not that person
anymore. You're the person youare today. You're not the person
you even were two days ago or ayear ago, right? Like I know
when I made such a hugetransition. I mean, I was
partying hard you guys likebefore I met was born and then
(14:49):
the like there was a couple oftimes that I partied and I was
like this is like bit This isnot what I want to do and I was
leading up To that, but I wasjust like, oh, this is thank
God, thank God, I get thechoice, right? I choose to not
stay here anymore. Because Iknow there's so much more for
(15:11):
me, right? And so you and thenyou got to bring your mind there
again and again and again. Andthat is the piece of the
accountability of like, I don'twant you to have to wait to do
this. Because what happens,right? Like, I intentionally and
I've got skills, right, so Ilike I've got these skills, and
I do it every day. But it'sstill hard for me, I will never
(15:31):
not have a coach like, thiswoman helped me see such a
different perspective, I came toher with this ideas like I want
to explore this a little bit.
And she took me into acompletely different direction
that like really simplified itfor me. Just because based on
like my own limitations, andshe's got this neutral,
objective perspective, that's sowas so amazing. And I was like,
(15:55):
yeah, like, I just get to see,your body is telling you, your
body is telling you when it'stime to pause. And that is when
you have a heightened emotionyour body is telling you when
it's time to call BS on yourthoughts. Right, but the
embodiment piece is anotherepisode because it's the both
it's the both and so you havelike, that's just a thought,
(16:19):
right? Like even about yourpartner or whatever. Like they
don't care, right? That's just athought, What do you want to
believe? Right? Because if yourmind like that was the in the
marriage upgrade, like that wasis like Dr. Shavon is like,
Where does your brain keepgoing? That's not supporting
your marriage? Like, where doyou want it to go like, and what
has happened in this in thisrelate this so far, is it's
(16:40):
drawn out all of these strengthsthat we already have, right?
Because her like one of herphilosophies is like you already
have an amazing marriage. Youjust can't see that. But I can.
And that's how I believe aboutyou, as you already have an
amazing life. And like there'snothing about you that needs to
change. You just need to shiftyour perspective I can I already
(17:01):
know that. I already know howamazing you are. And that
there's that you can reallyenjoy your life without alcohol.
I already know that's possiblefor you. And so with that
belief, I come to the table,right? Like I know, like, I feel
so much in my bones like thatDr. Shavon believes that for for
Matthew and I so much that it'sbuilding my belief right in
(17:23):
myself. And there has been like,what, what am I going to do?
Right? So we don't rely on theexternal to decide for us, we
get to decide on the internal.
So there's these thoughts like,everyone will think it's
strange, if I'm not drinking,it's normal, I'll be missing
out. I'm awkward. It's too hardlife will be boring, right? The
(17:46):
absolute pleasure of notdrinking and all the reasons
that you are aware of right nowlike you know how good you feel
when you wake up after a morningof not drinking. And the ones
that you are completely unawareof like I'm telling you, you
have no clue is when you use thefive shifts process of how
(18:09):
transformative your life willbecome in every single area. But
all of those thoughts, all ofyour automatic thoughts are
taking away the pleasure of notdrinking, because you believe
that those thoughts are true.
And they're just goingunexamined. So there's two main
(18:33):
steps in the process of this,which is mindfulness.
Mindfulness is becoming aware ofthe thoughts from a neutral
place the witness, taking a stepback behind yourself, and seeing
this from a neutral perspective.
And now, this is challenging fora lot of us, because we've got
opinions about everything. We'vegot opinions about other
people's thoughts, too. So toreally step into this place of
seeing something from a neutralperspective, without a charged
(18:54):
emotion. But do it when you'refeeling in alignment, right
examine this stuff, so that it'sin the forefront of your brain.
Don't just brush over it. Andthat's why we that's why one of
the big myths is I want todistract myself, I need to know
what to do when I have acraving. No, you don't know what
to know what else to do. Whenyou have a craving, you need to
(19:16):
know the different perspectiveto take when you have a craving
Oh, there's my craving. Right?
I'm going to witness this as anexperience. This is actually the
cue for me to examine how Ifeel, right? I'm having
resistance. What's the what'sthe thought creating the end
like if I'm willing to feel theresistance and I moved through
(19:37):
that? Well, now that's the onlyproblem. The only reason you're
drinking is because you don'twant to feel the resistance.
Right and but there was but whatyou don't realize is that the
resistance goes away when youstopped drinking. And when
you're willing to feel it so youdon't want like, I want you to
do all the things you'renaturally going to have more
time like yes, go to yoga, likedo all the things but don't turn
(19:59):
away just shift yourperspective, shift your
perspective to curiosity andcompassion, and everything else
will change. So when we'reyou're seeing it an objective
without an opinion, right? Andthen the mindset piece is you
now me you deciding whatattitude and opinion you want to
(20:22):
have about yourself inrelationship to alcohol. And
that is the other downfall oftraditional sobriety programs is
that there is a lot of shame, alot of comparison, and a lot of
this idea that it's going to behard forever, right? And it's
just not useful. Because you getto decide that's a thought, it's
(20:44):
going to be hard forever. And sois it's not going to be hard
forever, right? Or alcohol ispoison, or any thought that
doesn't create, like a feelingof pleasure and empowerment and
confidence in your body. So wewant to go from neutral to
positive, right? Like, oh, like,it's like, I just want you know,
and I see this too, with peoplewhere they start to, they start
(21:07):
to reduce their desire or theefforting. It's taking to say
no, and, and then that that doeschange like that they're able
to, they feel like they're morein control, and that they can
have like one or two becausethey've controlled part of it.
But what happens is that themindset of that is still making
(21:29):
alcohol important. And what ishappening in your body, when you
say no to that one or two. Andhow long does that last? For how
long? Do you want to be havingthe conversation about alcohol
in your life? What are youputting off today, tomorrow, a
year from now, five years fromnow? Because you're making space
for alcohol? Right? So what Iwant to take all my clients
(21:51):
doing, there's no, you get todecide for you, right? And like
people have tried, they've triedto go back to drinking after a
year and very quickly realized.
It's the same, right? But nowthey have the tools, right? Like
they've tried it and now theyhave the tools to be like, Oh,
no, I'm getting like I'm goingback. Right? curious minds want
to know. But it's not a problemwhen you can, when you tap back
(22:12):
into mindfulness, about it,where I want all my clients to
go where I want you to go isthat you feel when you say no,
do it no to a drink, there is noresistance. If use if there is
any circumstance, when saying noto a drink creates resistance,
you know that alcohol still youhas a tether to you? Right?
(22:39):
And that is different foreveryone. But it's expedited
when you put yourself incircumstances and you learn how
to feel resistance, then it'sless the next time. And when you
create the mindset of Who do Iwant to decide to be what
attitude and opinion do I wantto have about myself in
relationship to alcohol, I don'thave like, I've got my own
(23:00):
opinions about alcohol, but Idon't have opinions about other
people who drink, right? Like, Idon't care what they like, I
care what you do, because I knowthat you want to change, but
like my, like, I'm not likewasting my time with other
things, I want to help you getthe results that you want, which
is experiencing what it feelslike to have no resistance to
(23:25):
saying no to alcohol, but thenlike you're not really saying
no, you just don't drink. Soit's you know, there's like some
nuance there, right. And thenyou keep thinking those thoughts
again, and again. And again,until they become your reality,
just like the thoughts that youthought about alcohol. Except
this is the bonus, it doesn'ttake 20 or 30 years and like you
have these other naturalchemicals that are going to
(23:46):
support you in your body thathave no negative consequence.
Okay, so we're not substituting,we're not avoiding, we're not
counting days, there's no rulesor bargaining, right. And you
are in alignment with the womanwho you are deciding to become
like, it's amazing, you just getto decide, it's really as simple
(24:06):
as that. It really is as simpleas that. But you got to learn
these skills, right? You got tolearn the skills of observation,
you got to learn the skills ofevaluation, and the
accountability is the only wayto get there. Because you only
have so much bandwidth to dosomething new. And that's why
when we talk about like, like ifyou wanted to become a doctor,
(24:28):
like studying on your own wouldbe really really hard right? And
it just takes the process somuch longer. And that's why the
accountability of coaching isjust so powerful. And using you
know, they say when you readwhen you speak when you write
you learn quicker, right and sothat is what the my my private
(24:53):
one on one program is all aboutis it gives you all of these
opportunities to engage in thework from different areas of
your brain, and then you and Iare talking on a weekly basis,
so you're there's like ateaching and experiential
component of it because you'resharing with me your new
awarenesses. So it's like youget to teach me we get to have
(25:15):
these conversations you're in,like, you might be starting to
talk about it with your familyand your friends. And you're
going out and making a plan towith curiosity to implement the
new tools that you're learning,and then you're coming back and
reporting, right. So it's a veryactive learning experience. And
that that really is thedifference besides just not
(25:37):
drinking, and then talking aboutyour story of all the things
that you did or how hard it islike. So then you're like
learning a new skill set that'sin law in alignment with the
woman that you're becoming, whoalso can solve the all of the
other problems, who also isgoing to fact check her brain
about all of the otherlimitations, right, in a loving
way. And you get to have arelationship with yourself, your
(26:00):
relationship to alcohol will endwhen you begin a new
relationship with yourself. Andthis is where this becomes so
much more powerful and kind ofbigger than yourself. And I do
think sometimes for a lot ofpeople taking personal
responsibility, once they knowthis is scary and can like they
it's like, okay, well now Iknow, I have no one to blame,
(26:22):
and then that's like anotherlayer of it. But for most of you
listening, you're ready to takeresponsibility for your life
because you're a baller. I knowyou I know the people that I
hang out with, right? So it'slike, what do I want? The
attitude to be what attitude doI want? And then you think the
thoughts to be in line with thatattitude? And what if I fell in
(26:45):
love with the idea of gettingcloser to myself and becoming a
woman who belongs to herself?
What would she think? How does awoman who belongs to herself
respond to her emotions? Shedoesn't pour a bunch of booze on
top of it, say like, yeah, Ibetter get out of here. Right?
She might inquire like, Hey,what's going on? What is this
all about? How does she respondto other people's opinions about
(27:08):
her? Right? She doesn't flipthem off and say Screw you.
Right? She she can sense thatthere's a reflection, right?
That other people's opinions areabout us are usually some, you
know, insecurity that they have,right, we can kind of know this.
So take this fact checking. Andstart with the mindfulness piece
(27:34):
of examining your automaticthoughts when you feel a
triggered emotion. And we'regoing to learn how to feel the
trigger emotions first. That'swhy I always say stop at the E
stop at the emotion. And thenthe mindset is creating
intentional thoughts about whoyou get to decide to be in your
(27:55):
attitude and your opinions inrelationship to alcohol. If you
only started here, you wouldmake huge, huge headway. But
here's the here's the trick,right? It's not just one and
done. As you know, our mind ishabitual. So you're gonna keep
(28:17):
coming back. I mean, shit,they're stuff I'm working on
this year that I've been workingon for a few years. And that's
why I was like, Okay, I'm gonnanip this in the bud, I really
want to pull this out, I reallywant to get some, like, that's
why Matthew and I are doing thecoaching, we've been talking
about changing our reactions,and making sure we're in the
most peaceful environment allthe time. Like, we just want to
(28:37):
be in a peaceful environment allthe time. And we want to be the
best example of how emotionalintelligence for our kids,
right? And, you know, I'm human,but there's times where it's
like embarrassing. Sometimes,like the way that I'll naturally
react to something, and then Ihave to hold space for myself
and know that I'm human, andit's okay. But if there's a
(28:57):
slowing down, and then anintentional, like, this is why,
right? This is what I want. Andthis is why. And so that is
something else that you can askyourself, I want to be happier
without alcohol. I want to fallin love with an alcohol free
life. And this is why because Idon't want this shit taking up
my brain anymore, right? Soimagine in one year from now,
(29:21):
but like not efforting likeresistance and gritting your
teeth, right? The ease fulnessof like, just like being in the
pleasure of all of the thingsthat you feel when alcohol is
not taking up all of your brainspace, and a year from now, not
deciding like there's literallyno effort, right? But the
biggest biggest shift happens inthe first three weeks and then
(29:46):
in the first 12 weeks. And so Iwant you to know that when you
put your when you commit, notquit when you commit to learning
a new way and applying the fiveshow If that is the trajectory,
right, that is the trajectory ofwhat will happen with a
willingness to be open with awillingness to be open, because
(30:08):
you're not going to solve theproblem with alcohol with the
same mind that got you there.
And that's why you have to factcheck your mind. I can't wait to
talk to you soon. Have anamazing week. Hi, it's Mary
Wagstaff. I want to personallyinvite you to spend one hour
with me one on one. Because youdeserve to know what's holding
(30:28):
you back is your time, alcoholhas had its fair share. We're
going to talk aboutpossibilities about how to align
your thoughts and actions withyour dreams and what matters
most to you about why alcohol isno longer suited for the life
you want to live. How you canget on the fast track to freedom
from alcohol and stay therewithout deprivation. Follow the
(30:51):
link in the show notes or on mywebsite Mary Wagstaff
coached.com To schedule yourcomplimentary call and get a new
perspective on an old habit.
Do you ever feel like you're outgrowing alcohol, that
you are longing for a deeperconnection to life? If alcohol
is keeping you playing small andfeels like the one area, you
just can't figure out you are inthe right place. Hi, my name is
Mary Wagstaff. I'm a Holisticalcohol coach who ended a 20
year relationship to alcoholwithout labels, counting days or
(00:23):
ever making excuses. Now I helppowerful women just like you
eliminate their desire to drinkon their own terms. In this
podcast, we will explore therevolutionary approach of my
proven five shifts process thatgets alcohol out of your way by
breaking all of the rules, andthe profound experience that it
is to rediscover who you are onthe other side of alcohol. I am
(00:48):
so thrilled to be your guide.
Welcome to your journey ofawakening. Welcome back to the
show my beautiful listeners,thank you so much for being
here. As I reflected on my ownjourney. As I do, one of the
things I think is so importantwith the new year is not just to
plan the future. But to take amoment to presents everything
we've done with facts, it's likewe have to fact check our mind.
(01:11):
And that's what we're going totalk about today, how to fact
check your own mind. It's likethere's this journey of
awakening this awakening toconsciousness that's happening
simultaneously like with moreand more information coming into
our brain. And I'm going onthree years of the show, and,
you know, as you grow, and asI've gotten alcohol out of my
(01:34):
way, alcohol is no longer one ofthe things on like my top 10
list of what happens right likethis, the the success there was
there's no more efforting putin, and it really hasn't been
for the last at least couple ofyears. And that's what you have
to look forward to were beingalcohol free, is the is maybe
like the has become the root.
(02:00):
But like, of why you've beenable to grow so much. And
especially through this processof the journey of awakening. You
learn how to be mindful, and youlearn how to create a new
mindset. So that's why it'sactually such a gift to go
through the journey of awakeningwith alcohol, because this can
(02:22):
happen with anything withalcohol as the starting point or
the anchor calling you in. Butreally, it's just getting you
back to baseline of who youinnately are. And, you know, so
you can learn these skillswithout ever having, you know,
to get alcohol out of your way.
And you could learn thempartially with alcohol in your
(02:43):
way. But you don't have fullaccess to your really to
reality, right? Because there'salways this diluted part of the
alcohol being somewhereimportant in your brain and
trying to figure it out. And itjust takes up space where you
(03:04):
could be doing more, there's anefforting. Right. So getting to
the place where there'sliterally no efforting. And I
mean, that happens reallyquickly, you might have more
prevalent thoughts where youhave to fact check your mind. So
the difference between automaticthinking, and intentional
thinking is what we're going totalk about today. But that was
(03:27):
one of the things that showed upfor me, because I see this a lot
with, you know, in a lot ofsober communities and celebrate
yourself however you need towrite. But what I find with my
clients and with the five chefsprocess is that there isn't that
same efforting. And that's thewhole point, right? It's like we
(03:48):
want to get alcohol out of ourway and move on. And I think
that that's the best thing likesobriety isn't hard, right? Like
initially there's a thresholdyou have to walk yourself
through, there's a grace period.
But the thought that sobriety ishard, is not useful, in my
(04:10):
opinion, right. And it hasn'tbeen useful for my clients that
have major success. They reallywant that's like the whole thing
is you want to you have tointentionally decide on that
thought that sobriety is notgoing to be a challenge for me.
I'm going to go through aprocess and I'm going to learn
it. And that's the differencebetween automatic thinking and
(04:34):
habitual thinking like how likewho decides that sobriety is
hard, right? And what is hardabout sobriety? All it is is
your willingness to feel thesensations in your body. So
anything like we think it's thecircumstance that creates our
emotions, but it's our thoughtsabout it.
(04:55):
And if you haven't yet signed upfor a one on one coaching call
with me For the month ofJanuary, girl, I don't know what
you're doing. Because this is anamazing, amazing opportunity to
actually have a transformationin a really short amount of time
this offer is never going to behere again, $23 for a one on one
coaching call. And that way youcan experience the power of
(05:16):
coaching, I don't think before Istarted coaching myself and
having a coach, I didn't knowthe power of what was possible,
when two people come from aneutral place ready to solve
problems, like, you have to bewilling to like, Yeah, this is
where my mind is, and not takeit seriously not make it a big
deal, not take it personal,right, like I had a huge
breakthrough in a half hour withmy coach today. And this person,
(05:39):
I'm in a program where I get adifferent one on one coach every
week. So this person doesn'teven really like know me. And
it's fine, because I'm at alevel where I don't need that
and where my clients are cominginto me creating the safe and
sacred container to bevulnerable. And something like I
don't want to undermine everanyone's emotions, because I've
(06:00):
been there, right. And I want tocreate the safe and sacred
container for us to explore. Andthen when we move into the
portion of the program that isthrough written communication, I
already know you in a reallydeep and intimate level, I mean,
I'm pretty friendly with all ofmy clients, you can imagine.
That's why most people are here,because they, you know, I'm easy
(06:21):
to get along with them easy tolisten to. And, and so there's
the safety in like thevulnerability, right? And being
honest, where like, a lot ofpeople can't even do that in
therapy. And we laugh and wecelebrate. And you know, I'm
holding space to guide youthrough the emotions that sense
those things that you'reresisting so much. And then your
(06:42):
willingness to see like, oh,yeah, I have this thought not
useful, right? Like, oh, if I'mnot doing, you know, one of my
thoughts today was like, unlessI'm on a coaching call, like I'm
not creating value, unless I'mcoaching my client. And it's
like, so then that using my theETA process, it's like, the
actions I take from that place,are fueled with lack and
(07:04):
scarcity and panic, rather thanvalue. Right. So I, we create
based on the thoughts that we'rethinking, and that's why you
have to fact check your mind.
And the difference is not justin in retrospect, saying, you
know, oh, I know what I couldhave done differently. Or I was
(07:26):
making a big deal out of nothingor anything like that, like this
morning, I sat down, and I havethe intention this year and to
be to really work on the placesin my life where I have the most
reactivity, right where I spinout, like the circumstances that
I think are creating an emotionfor me, I want to intentionally
(07:49):
from a very neutral place knowwhat those are, experienced the
emotions in my body ahead oftime. So when they start to show
up in my real life, and I'm justgoing on habitual reaction,
right, I can take, I canrecognize it quicker and slow it
down. Matthew and I, at the endof the year just joined a what's
called the marriage upgrade. Andit's so amazing. And we haven't
(08:12):
even started coaching with thiswith this coach yet, Dr. Shavon.
She's amazing. She's very, like,just straightforward, simple and
profound. And before the programofficially starts, there was
kind of this primer programcalled the 21. Day sprint was a
very short audio, followed bysome questions. And Matthew and
(08:33):
I have been listening to thisaudio, we've been switching the
way that we spend our time tointentionally decide we want to
create a different result in ourrelationship, we want to upgrade
our relationship, we want to bemore conscious of the things
that aren't working, we don'twant to just say that like,
because you do this, this is howI respond, right? Our intentions
are peace, joy and adventure.
(08:54):
And just by making thisintention together and sitting
down and doing this, it'sslowing down the time where we
have maybe a natural reaction,like one of my things is to tell
him how to feel like, you know,in a moment where he's not
feeling. And the thing that Ireally want to do is to just say
(09:14):
I understand, it's okay is tovalidate him, let him have his
own experience and then comeback like especially if it's not
really affecting me, right. Sothe the whole act of bringing
something and this is the beautyof coaching, bringing something
into your awarenessintentionally when your nervous
system is online. And you arefeeling really good is okay, now
(09:39):
I'm going to go and check andI'm going to see what are the
thoughts what are the emotions Ihaven't been willing to feel
right because the circumstanceisn't really a problem if it
didn't create that emotion foryou and how we know that is
because everyone responds to aset of circumstances
differently. Right. So now allthe circumstances that you know
(09:59):
you have Have a resistance towhen it comes to alcohol. That's
not my experience. That's not myclients experience. Right and
there, it's going to bedifferent for everyone. Some
people have a lot of resistanceto being home alone by
themselves. Some people can goout and be social and never
drink, but it's when they're bythemselves. Some people could
never go out and be social,right? That's what they're
(10:19):
telling themselves. So thecircumstance doesn't dictate how
you're experiencing it, it isyour thought about it. So if
that emotion wasn't a problem,if you were willing to feel that
emotion first, you couldexperience the resistance, and
then go in willing to find newevidence. Okay, so what Dr.
(10:45):
Shavon calls, this is thethought makeover, right. And I'm
calling like fact check yourmind. So in addition to not
escaping feeling and emotion inyour body, calling out your
habitual mind is a skill thatyou need to have, like Matthew
will say something that he hasinformation about from like 15
years ago. And I have to likecall BS on him, right. And this
(11:06):
is what you have to do with yourbrain from in a really loving
neutral, like, you can kind oflaugh about it a little bit.
It's, it's the time when you'rein the heightened emotion that
it's hard to, you know, yourtake yourself so seriously. And
that's the thing, you got tostop taking your habitual
thoughts seriously, all of thethoughts that are creating your
results about alcohol are nottrue, they are not true. And you
(11:30):
have to stop taking them. Sopersonally, you have to start
investigating what they are andwanting to and willing to find
the opposite and createintentional thinking. Sobriety
is not hard, sobriety is a pieceof a breeze. Because what
happens when you think sobrietyis a breeze, you get to love the
results that it's giving youinstead of thinking about how
(11:52):
hard it is. And you get to loveyour reasons why when you bring
awareness to the thoughts thathave you in deprivation, or
scared or anxious to even take abreak or thinking about the
future, you have to examine themwith curiosity, your automatic
thoughts are make everything sopersonal, right? Because you
(12:17):
feel it in your body and that isyour lived experience. And if we
do not learn how to be inrelationship to our body, Elena
Brower today, I took a classthat said belonging to yourself,
what is it like to belong toyourself? To to make decisions
based on not the past you whenyou belong to yourself? You're
(12:40):
making decisions on this moment,right? But you also have to know
that automatic thoughts aren't aproblem. This is part of the
human This is how we learn. Sothere's really good reasons to
have automatic thoughts. But youalso just need to know are they
serving me or not? Because Ihave the automatic thought the
sobriety is a piece of cake,like there's no efforting in it,
right? That thought I want tokeep around forever, right? Like
(13:03):
I don't even think aboutsobriety like this is just my
life right? Like not drinking isis so easy for me. And it is. So
you want to you want to fillthis is the work right is we we
bridge the gap we bridge the gapto sobriety is hard to sobriety
is a piece of cake, and all ofthe thoughts that you need to
think in in the meat in betweentime.
(13:24):
So your opinions are based onwhat you have believed all of
that in interpretation, all ofthat socialized conditioning,
but you got to call BS on themand a really loving way. And you
can, it's just that shift ofperspective, right? And it takes
practice, it is a muscle thatyou build. And one of the
easiest ways I learned how to dothis really early on was saying
(13:47):
to myself, that's just athought. Or, you know, that's
not true for me anymore. I don'twant that to be true for me
anymore. I don't want that to bemy that's not my story anymore.
So just write that down. That'snot a thought. That's not my
story anymore. Right? That wasmy story. When I was in college.
That was my story when I was 16.
And I was so awkward. And I wasso shy. And I would go to those
(14:07):
keg parties. And I had a couplebeers. And I was like, now I
wanted to talk to everyone.
That's not my story anymore.
Because I'm a 41 year old womanwith a business with a kid with
a house with a you know, havingto do all these adult things and
working and like that's not mystory anymore. I know how to
interact with people without,you know, maybe there's some
things that aren't natural tome, but I but I can learn
(14:29):
anything, right? So you'd likethe willingness to like,
explore, that's not my storyanymore. You're not that person
anymore. You're the person youare today. You're not the person
you even were two days ago or ayear ago, right? Like I know
when I made such a hugetransition. I mean, I was
partying hard you guys likebefore I met was born and then
(14:49):
the like there was a couple oftimes that I partied and I was
like this is like bit This isnot what I want to do and I was
leading up To that, but I wasjust like, oh, this is thank
God, thank God, I get thechoice, right? I choose to not
stay here anymore. Because Iknow there's so much more for
(15:11):
me, right? And so you and thenyou got to bring your mind there
again and again and again. Andthat is the piece of the
accountability of like, I don'twant you to have to wait to do
this. Because what happens,right? Like, I intentionally and
I've got skills, right, so Ilike I've got these skills, and
I do it every day. But it'sstill hard for me, I will never
(15:31):
not have a coach like, thiswoman helped me see such a
different perspective, I came toher with this ideas like I want
to explore this a little bit.
And she took me into acompletely different direction
that like really simplified itfor me. Just because based on
like my own limitations, andshe's got this neutral,
objective perspective, that's sowas so amazing. And I was like,
(15:55):
yeah, like, I just get to see,your body is telling you, your
body is telling you when it'stime to pause. And that is when
you have a heightened emotionyour body is telling you when
it's time to call BS on yourthoughts. Right, but the
embodiment piece is anotherepisode because it's the both
it's the both and so you havelike, that's just a thought,
(16:19):
right? Like even about yourpartner or whatever. Like they
don't care, right? That's just athought, What do you want to
believe? Right? Because if yourmind like that was the in the
marriage upgrade, like that wasis like Dr. Shavon is like,
Where does your brain keepgoing? That's not supporting
your marriage? Like, where doyou want it to go like, and what
has happened in this in thisrelate this so far, is it's
(16:40):
drawn out all of these strengthsthat we already have, right?
Because her like one of herphilosophies is like you already
have an amazing marriage. Youjust can't see that. But I can.
And that's how I believe aboutyou, as you already have an
amazing life. And like there'snothing about you that needs to
change. You just need to shiftyour perspective I can I already
(17:01):
know that. I already know howamazing you are. And that
there's that you can reallyenjoy your life without alcohol.
I already know that's possiblefor you. And so with that
belief, I come to the table,right? Like I know, like, I feel
so much in my bones like thatDr. Shavon believes that for for
Matthew and I so much that it'sbuilding my belief right in
(17:23):
myself. And there has been like,what, what am I going to do?
Right? So we don't rely on theexternal to decide for us, we
get to decide on the internal.
So there's these thoughts like,everyone will think it's
strange, if I'm not drinking,it's normal, I'll be missing
out. I'm awkward. It's too hardlife will be boring, right? The
(17:46):
absolute pleasure of notdrinking and all the reasons
that you are aware of right nowlike you know how good you feel
when you wake up after a morningof not drinking. And the ones
that you are completely unawareof like I'm telling you, you
have no clue is when you use thefive shifts process of how
(18:09):
transformative your life willbecome in every single area. But
all of those thoughts, all ofyour automatic thoughts are
taking away the pleasure of notdrinking, because you believe
that those thoughts are true.
And they're just goingunexamined. So there's two main
(18:33):
steps in the process of this,which is mindfulness.
Mindfulness is becoming aware ofthe thoughts from a neutral
place the witness, taking a stepback behind yourself, and seeing
this from a neutral perspective.
And now, this is challenging fora lot of us, because we've got
opinions about everything. We'vegot opinions about other
people's thoughts, too. So toreally step into this place of
seeing something from a neutralperspective, without a charged
(18:54):
emotion. But do it when you'refeeling in alignment, right
examine this stuff, so that it'sin the forefront of your brain.
Don't just brush over it. Andthat's why we that's why one of
the big myths is I want todistract myself, I need to know
what to do when I have acraving. No, you don't know what
to know what else to do. Whenyou have a craving, you need to
(19:16):
know the different perspectiveto take when you have a craving
Oh, there's my craving. Right?
I'm going to witness this as anexperience. This is actually the
cue for me to examine how Ifeel, right? I'm having
resistance. What's the what'sthe thought creating the end
like if I'm willing to feel theresistance and I moved through
(19:37):
that? Well, now that's the onlyproblem. The only reason you're
drinking is because you don'twant to feel the resistance.
Right and but there was but whatyou don't realize is that the
resistance goes away when youstopped drinking. And when
you're willing to feel it so youdon't want like, I want you to
do all the things you'renaturally going to have more
time like yes, go to yoga, likedo all the things but don't turn
(19:59):
away just shift yourperspective, shift your
perspective to curiosity andcompassion, and everything else
will change. So when we'reyou're seeing it an objective
without an opinion, right? Andthen the mindset piece is you
now me you deciding whatattitude and opinion you want to
(20:22):
have about yourself inrelationship to alcohol. And
that is the other downfall oftraditional sobriety programs is
that there is a lot of shame, alot of comparison, and a lot of
this idea that it's going to behard forever, right? And it's
just not useful. Because you getto decide that's a thought, it's
(20:44):
going to be hard forever. And sois it's not going to be hard
forever, right? Or alcohol ispoison, or any thought that
doesn't create, like a feelingof pleasure and empowerment and
confidence in your body. So wewant to go from neutral to
positive, right? Like, oh, like,it's like, I just want you know,
and I see this too, with peoplewhere they start to, they start
(21:07):
to reduce their desire or theefforting. It's taking to say
no, and, and then that that doeschange like that they're able
to, they feel like they're morein control, and that they can
have like one or two becausethey've controlled part of it.
But what happens is that themindset of that is still making
(21:29):
alcohol important. And what ishappening in your body, when you
say no to that one or two. Andhow long does that last? For how
long? Do you want to be havingthe conversation about alcohol
in your life? What are youputting off today, tomorrow, a
year from now, five years fromnow? Because you're making space
for alcohol? Right? So what Iwant to take all my clients
(21:51):
doing, there's no, you get todecide for you, right? And like
people have tried, they've triedto go back to drinking after a
year and very quickly realized.
It's the same, right? But nowthey have the tools, right? Like
they've tried it and now theyhave the tools to be like, Oh,
no, I'm getting like I'm goingback. Right? curious minds want
to know. But it's not a problemwhen you can, when you tap back
(22:12):
into mindfulness, about it,where I want all my clients to
go where I want you to go isthat you feel when you say no,
do it no to a drink, there is noresistance. If use if there is
any circumstance, when saying noto a drink creates resistance,
you know that alcohol still youhas a tether to you? Right?
(22:39):
And that is different foreveryone. But it's expedited
when you put yourself incircumstances and you learn how
to feel resistance, then it'sless the next time. And when you
create the mindset of Who do Iwant to decide to be what
attitude and opinion do I wantto have about myself in
relationship to alcohol, I don'thave like, I've got my own
(23:00):
opinions about alcohol, but Idon't have opinions about other
people who drink, right? Like, Idon't care what they like, I
care what you do, because I knowthat you want to change, but
like my, like, I'm not likewasting my time with other
things, I want to help you getthe results that you want, which
is experiencing what it feelslike to have no resistance to
(23:25):
saying no to alcohol, but thenlike you're not really saying
no, you just don't drink. Soit's you know, there's like some
nuance there, right. And thenyou keep thinking those thoughts
again, and again. And again,until they become your reality,
just like the thoughts that youthought about alcohol. Except
this is the bonus, it doesn'ttake 20 or 30 years and like you
have these other naturalchemicals that are going to
(23:46):
support you in your body thathave no negative consequence.
Okay, so we're not substituting,we're not avoiding, we're not
counting days, there's no rulesor bargaining, right. And you
are in alignment with the womanwho you are deciding to become
like, it's amazing, you just getto decide, it's really as simple
(24:06):
as that. It really is as simpleas that. But you got to learn
these skills, right? You got tolearn the skills of observation,
you got to learn the skills ofevaluation, and the
accountability is the only wayto get there. Because you only
have so much bandwidth to dosomething new. And that's why
when we talk about like, like ifyou wanted to become a doctor,
(24:28):
like studying on your own wouldbe really really hard right? And
it just takes the process somuch longer. And that's why the
accountability of coaching isjust so powerful. And using you
know, they say when you readwhen you speak when you write
you learn quicker, right and sothat is what the my my private
(24:53):
one on one program is all aboutis it gives you all of these
opportunities to engage in thework from different areas of
your brain, and then you and Iare talking on a weekly basis,
so you're there's like ateaching and experiential
component of it because you'resharing with me your new
awarenesses. So it's like youget to teach me we get to have
(25:15):
these conversations you're in,like, you might be starting to
talk about it with your familyand your friends. And you're
going out and making a plan towith curiosity to implement the
new tools that you're learning,and then you're coming back and
reporting, right. So it's a veryactive learning experience. And
that that really is thedifference besides just not
(25:37):
drinking, and then talking aboutyour story of all the things
that you did or how hard it islike. So then you're like
learning a new skill set that'sin law in alignment with the
woman that you're becoming, whoalso can solve the all of the
other problems, who also isgoing to fact check her brain
about all of the otherlimitations, right, in a loving
way. And you get to have arelationship with yourself, your
(26:00):
relationship to alcohol will endwhen you begin a new
relationship with yourself. Andthis is where this becomes so
much more powerful and kind ofbigger than yourself. And I do
think sometimes for a lot ofpeople taking personal
responsibility, once they knowthis is scary and can like they
it's like, okay, well now Iknow, I have no one to blame,
(26:22):
and then that's like anotherlayer of it. But for most of you
listening, you're ready to takeresponsibility for your life
because you're a baller. I knowyou I know the people that I
hang out with, right? So it'slike, what do I want? The
attitude to be what attitude doI want? And then you think the
thoughts to be in line with thatattitude? And what if I fell in
(26:45):
love with the idea of gettingcloser to myself and becoming a
woman who belongs to herself?
What would she think? How does awoman who belongs to herself
respond to her emotions? Shedoesn't pour a bunch of booze on
top of it, say like, yeah, Ibetter get out of here. Right?
She might inquire like, Hey,what's going on? What is this
all about? How does she respondto other people's opinions about
(27:08):
her? Right? She doesn't flipthem off and say Screw you.
Right? She she can sense thatthere's a reflection, right?
That other people's opinions areabout us are usually some, you
know, insecurity that they have,right, we can kind of know this.
So take this fact checking. Andstart with the mindfulness piece
(27:34):
of examining your automaticthoughts when you feel a
triggered emotion. And we'regoing to learn how to feel the
trigger emotions first. That'swhy I always say stop at the E
stop at the emotion. And thenthe mindset is creating
intentional thoughts about whoyou get to decide to be in your
(27:55):
attitude and your opinions inrelationship to alcohol. If you
only started here, you wouldmake huge, huge headway. But
here's the here's the trick,right? It's not just one and
done. As you know, our mind ishabitual. So you're gonna keep
(28:17):
coming back. I mean, shit,they're stuff I'm working on
this year that I've been workingon for a few years. And that's
why I was like, Okay, I'm gonnanip this in the bud, I really
want to pull this out, I reallywant to get some, like, that's
why Matthew and I are doing thecoaching, we've been talking
about changing our reactions,and making sure we're in the
most peaceful environment allthe time. Like, we just want to
(28:37):
be in a peaceful environment allthe time. And we want to be the
best example of how emotionalintelligence for our kids,
right? And, you know, I'm human,but there's times where it's
like embarrassing. Sometimes,like the way that I'll naturally
react to something, and then Ihave to hold space for myself
and know that I'm human, andit's okay. But if there's a
(28:57):
slowing down, and then anintentional, like, this is why,
right? This is what I want. Andthis is why. And so that is
something else that you can askyourself, I want to be happier
without alcohol. I want to fallin love with an alcohol free
life. And this is why because Idon't want this shit taking up
my brain anymore, right? Soimagine in one year from now,
(29:21):
but like not efforting likeresistance and gritting your
teeth, right? The ease fulnessof like, just like being in the
pleasure of all of the thingsthat you feel when alcohol is
not taking up all of your brainspace, and a year from now, not
deciding like there's literallyno effort, right? But the
biggest biggest shift happens inthe first three weeks and then
(29:46):
in the first 12 weeks. And so Iwant you to know that when you
put your when you commit, notquit when you commit to learning
a new way and applying the fiveshow If that is the trajectory,
right, that is the trajectory ofwhat will happen with a
willingness to be open with awillingness to be open, because
(30:08):
you're not going to solve theproblem with alcohol with the
same mind that got you there.
And that's why you have to factcheck your mind. I can't wait to
talk to you soon. Have anamazing week. Hi, it's Mary
Wagstaff. I want to personallyinvite you to spend one hour
with me one on one. Because youdeserve to know what's holding
(30:28):
you back is your time, alcoholhas had its fair share. We're
going to talk aboutpossibilities about how to align
your thoughts and actions withyour dreams and what matters
most to you about why alcohol isno longer suited for the life
you want to live. How you canget on the fast track to freedom
from alcohol and stay therewithout deprivation. Follow the
(30:51):
link in the show notes or on mywebsite Mary Wagstaff
coached.com To schedule yourcomplimentary call and get a new
perspective on an old habit.
Popular Podcasts
24/7 News: The Latest
The latest news in 4 minutes updated every hour, every day.
Therapy Gecko
An unlicensed lizard psychologist travels the universe talking to strangers about absolutely nothing. TO CALL THE GECKO: follow me on https://www.twitch.tv/lyleforever to get a notification for when I am taking calls. I am usually live Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays but lately a lot of other times too. I am a gecko.
The Joe Rogan Experience
The official podcast of comedian Joe Rogan.